A special advertising supplement
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contents
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Money & Matrimony
Something borrowed, something blue, something you don’t have to do Wedding tools make planning easier Engaged Onslow Contest Winner Cover photo credit Alicia Q Alicia Q Photography www.aliciaqphotography.com
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A guide to Wedding Binder Printables
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Planning tricks the professionals use
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Treat guests to personalized vows
The Engaged Onslow Bridal Expo book is an advertising special section published by GateHouse Media, a private enterprise not connected with the DoD or the U.S. Marine Corps. The appearance of advertising in this publication does not constitute endorsement of these products or services by the DoD, the U.S. Marine Corps, or GateHouse Media. Published February 8, 2018. Everything advertised in this publication shall be made available for purchase, use or patronage without regard to race, color, religion, sex, national origin, age, marital status, physical handicap, political affiliation, or any other non-merit factor of the purchaser, user, or patron. If a violation or rejection of this equal opportunity policy by an advertiser is confirmed, the publisher shall refuse to print advertising from that source until the violation is corrected. The editorial content of this publication is the responsibility of GateHouse Media. For distribution and advertising information inquires, call (910) 939-0700.
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MONEY & MATRIMONY:
Financial topics to discuss before you say I do Chris DeWitt
Getting married joins you with a partner for life. Before getting married, there are a lot of details to iron out. Deciding where to get married, who to invite, what to eat and even what to wear are just a few of the planning details thrown into the fray. However, there is another crucial topic that couples should consider before putting a ring on it—finances. Financial woes can take a great toll on married couples. Individuals need to remember that they join into the financial situation of their spouse just as they join his/her family. What exactly regarding finances should be on the table for discussion? Dr. Mark Thompson, associate pastor and marriage counselor at Centerview Baptist Church, has navigated through this key issue with engaged couples. “There are several financial areas couples should talk about before marriage,” said Thompson. “They both need to have similar philosophies on spending, saving, budgeting, etc. or there will be significant issues in the marriage. They should also talk about how much money they will spend on the wedding and honeymoon. Having a shared strategy for financial manage-
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ment is one of the indicators of a healthy marriage. If you start a marriage in financial distress with differing philosophies on the management of finances, you have a recipe for disaster.” Money can be a difficult topic to talk about. However, there are some favorable approaches to tackling it. “The most important thing is not to assume that the other person knows your philosophy inherently,” said Thompson. “You must talk about issues in advance. Good pre-marital counseling can aid greatly in this endeavor. Since opposites tend to attract in marriage, it is not uncommon that you will have different approaches to finances. Knowing these, listening to each other, and then making necessary compromises will definitely help prevent long-term marriage problems.” Communication and preparation before you get married are vital for preventing financial disagreement later. Seeking pre-martial counseling can help provide a strong foundation to get the necessary tools to get you started. For more information, talk to marriage and family counselors who can guide you along your path to the altar.
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Something borrowed, something blue, something you don’t have to do Kenbasa Harrell
A lot of thought goes into planning that special day, but how much planning is over-planning? From the fancy wedding invitations to the extravagant meal choices that your guests forget to choose from, a large amount of the stress that you put on your shoulders can be averted. Have you ever decided that you were not going to attend a friend’s or relative’s wedding because they were not planning on serving lobster bisque as a main course with, tiramisu as a dessert option? Chances are the answer is no. “They could have served finger sandwiches and I would have been just fine with it,” said Samantha Nelson, a Jacksonville local who recently attended the wedding of two close family friends. “They are two of my closest friends and I was happier to see them tie the knot than I was to see that T-bone steaks were on the menu.” Make it easier on yourself and plan your meal options based on what you and your future spouse want and not on what will impress your guest
list. It’s your big day not theirs. That is how they see it and that is how you should see it as well. Another widely over-planned aspect of a wedding is the decorative stationery that we carefully craft in order to announce the big day. From the envelope to the paper inside, your future guests will be disposing of all of it as soon as they have typed it into their smart phones. “I definitely had no plans of keeping the invitation, as nice as it was,” said Nelson. Living in the age of technology affords us many more options when it comes to getting the word out. It may not follow old wedding tradition guidelines, but not many things that we do these days remain constricted to such specifics anyways. Thinking outside of the box may actually take less time. With so much else to schedule and plan pertaining to one of the happiest days of your life, it will always benefit to lift some of the weight off of your shoulders by simplifying the smaller details.
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Wedding tools make planning easier Ensuring an event goes on with minimal hiccups takes patience and thorough planning. This is especially true for weddings, when many elements must merge together for a memorable day. Today’s couples have a bevy of new resources at their disposal to facilitate wedding planning. The internet makes vetting vendors and reading reviews that much easier, but wedding-related apps also can simplify wedding planning. The following are some top picks as culled by Wedding Shoppe, Inc., The Knot and Lifehacker. Wedding Spot: Couples can search for their ideal wedding venue based on location, budget, styles, and capacity. The website enables users to plan their ideal weddings and get cost estimates based on guest list and options. Users also can access discounts and exclusive deals. Wedding LookBook: This app enables couples to browse through thousands of dresses, accessories, jewelry, and much more. The app will help customers f ind products in their area. Shutterf ly: This photo, invitation and image-sharing tool can be an inexpensive place to create save-the-date stationery, invitations, and photo memory books. Appy Couple: This app and website helps couples manage their budgets, timelines, wedding parties, and seating charts, while also allowing them to share photos. There is a free version and basic packages that allow access to more features.
iWedding Deluxe: In addition to managing timelines, to-do lists and vendors, this app offers inspiration ideas for gowns, manages and tracks gifts, and offers f irst dance suggestions from iTunes. However, it is only available to iPhone users. AllSeated: This tool can help couples f igure out seating arrangements by creating 3D f loor plans of the event, and couples can pull contacts from email and social networks to establish a guest list. If f loor plans are unavailable in their database, they can be drawn. The Knot’s Marketplace: With the click of a button, couples can search for wedding vendors in all different categories, read reviews, and directly connect with those businesses. HitchSwitch: Brides or grooms who may be changing their names can do so in one convenient place. Three different packages cater to various name-changing needs. Vistaprint: These stationery specialists offer an array of services, from cards to invitations to personalized envelopes. Once a design is chosen, Vistaprint will offer addon suggestions for coordinating items, helping to create a cohesive look for the festivities. Wedding websites, apps and more can streamline wedding planning. – Metro Creative Connection
Wedding website dos and don’ts Technology continues to infiltrate all areas of life. So it should come as no surprise that apps and digital organization play a prominent role in many couples’ weddings. Couples may now feel it is necessary to design a wedding website to keep their guests up-to-date. Though they’re useful when planning a wedding, websites are not a must-have, according to bridal etiquette experts. However, those who choose to delve into the world of wedding websites can keep these pointers in mind when navigating. DO use the wedding website as a central hub for putting pertinent information about the wedding that may not be covered on invitations or save-the-date cards. DON’T ignore the potential for identity theft and privacy. Wedding websites can put quite a deal of personal information out for public consumption. Not only will the website advertise when the wedding takes place (when your home and the homes of all your guests will be empty), but also it could include birthdays, maiden names,
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and other information that would normally be more difficult to track down. DO use a wedding website provider that gives you the option to password protect your website. Urge guests not to share this protected information with others. DON’T caption engagement photos, bachelorette party photos and more with dates and names on the wedding website and on other social media. DO skip the wedding website if you are strongly opposed to it. When properly composed, a wedding invitation will convey all the pertinent details. A group email or phone calls can alert guests to any changes after the fact. DON’T forget to link to gift registries. DO use the wedding website to collect responses and then make a table seating arrangement online. This will help you stay more organized and streamlined. Wedding websites are yet another tool couples can use to stay organized as they plan their weddings. – Metro Creative Connection
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NOT
TES
A guide to Wedding Binder Printables Ena Sellers
He finally dropped down to his knees and said those four magic words … You said yes and the world feels magical. For most girls, planning the perfect wedding is something we dream about since we’re old enough to play with Barbie dolls and when the time comes, we are ready to jump in and get hands on planning, but first let’s get organized. The first step is to get a binder big enough to accommodate for all your important planning information from “to do” check lists, vendor timelines, sitting charts, emergency contacts and wedding inspiration, to a section where you can keep copies of vendor agreements, deposit receipts and meeting notes. We recommend at the least a 3” binder. The second step is to do some online research and download a few Printables. If you are not familiar with the term Printables, as the word describes it, they are files that you can print. The function of a Printable is to aid you in staying organized. Printable kits usually include time lines for your ceremony and reception, complete vendor-by-vendor check lists, contact lists, to do lists and things to remember to name a few. Most Printable kits will include page dividers for each category and subcategory, so you can stay on top of your game. Thanks to a myriad internet of sites you can find an array of free designs to suit your needs and maybe even match your wedding theme. For your convenience, I have included some great sites I
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came across while doing my research for this story. One of my favorite free planning Printables is Martha Stewart’s Wedding Workbook, it features eight pages of work sheets that include lists of things you need to start planning on from six months out, up to a day before the wedding. It also includes a budget planner, a guest list planner where you can track invitations sent, RSVPs and everything guest related. The workbook also has a photography check list with a list of must have shots; a music planner that provides a timeline for songs you want to include from the prelude to every key moment of the celebration, including a ‘do not play list.’ The work book also provides a flower planner check list with a helpful list of flowers by season to help you keep your budget in check. If you are looking for a Printable to aid you in creating your seating chart, WeddingWire’s Sitting Chart Tool is an easy to use program that allows you to drag and drop names from your guest list. In this free program, you can customize the shapes and sizes of your tables and design the entire floor plan, including the location of the cake table, dance floor, DJ table, etc. If you are looking for a classy, yet fun wedding timeline, Confetti.co.uk has a beautiful free Pintable Wedding Day Timeline worth checking out. When it comes to Wedding Binder Printables, the sky is the limit! Make sure to check out Etsy and Pinterest for more great inspiration.
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Planning tricks the professionals use
Wedding planning can be an exciting undertaking, but couples who have already walked down the aisle can attest that wedding planning also can be stressful. Ensuring all of the details come out right can prove overwhelming at times.
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Hiring a wedding planner is one way to alleviate some of the stress associated with wedding planning. Couples who do not have the money to hire wedding planner can borrow some of the tips and tricks professionals rely on when planning weddings.
arrangements can be time-consuming. Also, many flowers no longer produce strong scents because they’re bred for longer stems and a lengthy vase life. Interspersing potted plants with arrangements that are lighter on blooms and heavier on filler can help cost-conscious couple stick to budget.
Make guests the first priority Even though it may seem like weddings should be geared around couples tying the knot, many wedding planners advise couples to focus on accommodating their guests. Having a handle on the number of people who will be attending, any of their specific needs (allergies, mobility issues, etc.), providing a comfortable environment (addressing bugs, weather, seating shortages), and knowing how much space guests will require can make choosing a venue that much easier.
Trust vendors’ advice Wedding vendors tend to know one another and can be good sources of information. A wedding photographer, for example, may be able to tell couples which reception venues photograph particularly well, and a reception manager may know which DJs or bands are best at getting guests on the dance floor.
Rent what you don’t have Renting rather than purchasing items can save couples money. Wedding planners do not stockpile items such as tables, chairs and decorations. Instead, they rely on rental companies to provide what is necessary. According to Minneapolis-based professionals The Wedding Guys, even couples working with small budgets can enhance or elevate their weddings by working with rental companies. Flush out foliage Wedding planners know that flowers cost a great deal of money, especially flowers that are not native to the region where couples are getting married. The process of making
Negotiate before signing the contract Wedding planners understand that vendors may be more willing to offer perks or extras rather than adding up a la carte pricing before the contract is signed. This way they secure the reservation on good will. Negotiating for more later on may be difficult. Get organized Organization is key. Brides- and grooms-to-be may want to enlist friends or relatives with a flair for organization to help with details. Borrowing tricks from wedding planners can help couples save money and avoid stress. – Metro Creative Connection
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Treat guests to
personalized
vows
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Couples who choose to write their own wedding vows recognize how special such personal gestures are. Writing one’s own vows can impart a personalized and special touch to the ceremony. But as anyone who has stared down a blank piece of paper or blinking cursor can attest, a case of writer’s block may encourage couples to abandon the idea of writing their own vows. Writing vows can be nerve-wracking. Many couples are unaccustomed to speaking in front of crowds, and then there is the challenge of turning life-altering feelings into language that will appeal to the masses. But couples struggling with their vows need not throw in the vow-writing towel. With some practice and guidance, anyone can write cherished vows that will be remembered for all of the right reasons for years to come. Skip the schtick. Jokes may pop up in speeches throughout the evening, but wedding vows can be your chance to truly speak from the heart. Humor may come across as insincerity. Rather, list the words that describe your feelings for your future spouse, and build on that. Tell a story. If you need inspiration, look to a moment in your relationship when you really knew this was the person with whom you wanted to share your life. Relay the story, but keep it brief. Try to be as specific as possible, and recognize that it’s acceptable to be playful with your words. When it’s really coming from the heart and not the head, you’ll know it. Borrow from traditional words. Take traditional vows and tweak them to make them your own. This works especially
well for those who have trouble getting started or are unsure of which format to follow. Incorporate key words, such as “partners,” “love,” “friends,” “joy,” and “forever.” Be sure the officiant is on board. Depending on the type of ceremony, the officiant may have final say over what can or cannot be included in your vows. Religious ceremonies, for example, may be limited to certain scripture readings and traditional vows. Before you devote any time to writing vows, ensure that it’s alright to include them. Otherwise, save personalized sentiments for a special toast at the wedding reception. Decide on a mutual structure for the vows. If you and your spouse will not be writing the vows together, agree on a format that you both will follow. Otherwise, you might be writing about your unending love, and he or she may be promising to keep updated on favorite sports teams or television programs. You want the tone and style of the vows to be cohesive. Dig deeper. Look into the future and project how you hope your life to be in 10 or 20 years. Explain all of the reasons you want to be together for the duration. Read the vows several times. Read over your work and make sure the language is clear and there are no glaring errors. It may take a few versions to get the final version right where you want it. Get a second opinion. Ask someone you trust to listen to the vows and offer feedback. This needs to be a person who will be honest and not just tell you what you want to hear. Personalized vows can add an extra special touch to wedding ceremonies. – Metro Creative Connection
Did you know? Since Ancient Roman times, June has been a popular month for couples to tie the knot. The month’s namesake, the goddess Juno, was said to be the protector of women in every aspect, but most notably in regard to marriage and childbearing. Therefore, it made sense to get married and take the first step toward creating a family in June. For practical reasons, June also has been a prime month for marriage because the month is neither especially hot nor especially cold in many areas of the world. While dressed in formalwear – whether having an outdoor wedding or an indoor one – no one wants to be overheated or uncomfortably cold. While June is a still a popular month to get married, the wedding resource The Knot indicates that autumn, in particular the months of September and October, has overtaken summer as the most popular wedding season. Warmer-than-average temperatures in autumn over the last few years as well as a dazzling display of natural color help make the fall a popular time for nuptials. Interestingly enough, perhaps due to a slightly cooler climate, a 2015 survey from Wedding Bells found August to be the most popular month to get married in Canada, and that 67 percent of weddings in Canada that year occurred between June and September. – Metro Creative Connection
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