The Fashion of Ageing is the Fashion to Follow

By Charisse Glenn

Ageless means ‘being of all generations, not ageing or appearing to age’.

To want to look youthful is not an issue, masking it behind a facade of fear is. Acknowledging what prevents us from owning our years is essential to our spiritual growth. We are all ageing — every one of us, every minute of every day. We will never be chronologically younger than we are at this moment.

The good news is how we handle it will determine if we grow old or if we become ageless. Becoming ageless happens when we shift our perspective. The shift is happening. We are entering a new era; the fashion of ageing is upon us. Never before have women embraced the natural cycle of life as they are doing now. As a young woman, I admired women who went grey. Exuding an aura of wisdom and youthful curiosity, they seemed to be shrouded in mystery, holding a secret behind the twinkle in their eyes. I wanted to know what allowed them to be so confident and free.

Years later, as my grey began to appear, I lacked the courage to let it show. I was not ready to become the woman I was meant to be. I struggled. The ramifications seemed immense. Ageism is rampant in the world in which I work. I have been a commercial casting director in Los Angeles for more than 30 years. In this image and youth-oriented business, was I endangering my livelihood if I allowed my age to show? In the realm of advertising, as you approach 50, you are looking at the exit door. So, like millions of women, I coloured the grey.

Momentarily I felt better, and yet I felt like a spiritual charlatan for hiding my true self. The dread of exposure was always hanging over me. When I finally decided to let my grey shine, most of my friends were shocked. To their reactions, I responded: ” I am doing it so I can speak my truth.”

When I decided to follow the course of nature and let my hair grey, I let go of pressures that I hadn’t realised I was carrying around — pressures of how I was taught to be. I am not advocating all women to go grey; it is a personal choice, just like our wardrobe. Yet, for me, it was a gateway to my authentic self.

The need to come to terms with my ageing was crucial for my journey of self-realisation. Acceptance of who I am, naked, without adornments was imperative. I needed to face myself without shame. It was not easy. At times, I was unrecognisable to myself. The inner image I carried had not reconciled with the one reflecting me – who was that old woman looking at me?

Nothing in nature stands still, so why should we? The secret those women knew so many years ago was knowing they did not need society’s permission to Be. They followed the course of nature, flowing with the change of seasons, understanding the power of renewal, regrowth, and resilience. The energy they exuded, crossed generations. There is nothing more attractive or sexy than someone living their truth.

Those women were the forerunners to the fashion of ageing. They were setting the stage for us. But society still had a stranglehold on our perceptions. The time to challenge those perceptions has arrived. A current trend in fashion, spearheaded by young men and women, is to colour their hair grey. They see the beauty in what those experiencing the transition see as appalling. The door has opened for those who have been hiding behind the facade of youth.

However, we don’t suddenly become fashionable. First, we must let go of our acceptance of society’s stigma about ageing. The stigma happens slowly. We barely realise it is happening at all. There is a sense of irrelevance, an almost imperceptible fading. Deep within, there is a feeling something is changing.

Then one day, we feel as if we are no longer modern. We have a veil of invisibility around us. Yet, it is not about who we are. It is about how our culture imposes its prejudice of age upon us. For this reason, many women resist the ageing process. They are holding onto perceived youth, shielding the truth of reality from themselves. They have not made peace with their reflection in the mirror.

When I decided to follow the course of nature and let my hair grey, I let go of pressures that I hadn’t realised I was carrying around — pressures of how I was taught to be. I am not advocating all women to go grey; it is a personal choice, just like our wardrobe. Yet, for me, it was a gateway to my authentic self. Evidence of my ageing was a badge that said I could be and do as I wished. I no longer needed permission to be me. It was liberating. I felt a profound sense of peace. It was as if my souls’ purpose was screaming out to the Universe; I got it! I am whole and complete and perfect as I am. On Becoming Ageless:

My vision has improved. I now see qualities like kindness, gratitude, empathy, and compassion more than I see physical traits. I can see another’s journey without judgment, but rather with tolerance and understanding. My sense of hearing has been heightened. I hear the positive more than the negative. I can hear words that are unspoken.

“We are all ageing — every one of us, every minute of every day. We will never be chronologically younger than we are at this moment. The good news is how we handle it will determine if we grow old or if we become ageless.”

I have become more flexible. Ancient trees that have lived hundreds or thousands of years have become my teachers. They may stand upright or twisted from their experiences, but they bend and sway with the winds, having learned to be rigid will only break their branches. I have become stronger. As with trees each year, they grow stronger and more resilient, so do I. Sharp words no longer cut me, nor can the daggers from angry eyes pierce my skin. I have not toughened but instead have become like flowing water.

I can nourish myself. As trees drop their leaves to nourish the ground, I, too, have learned to nurture myself. When thoughts enter my mind, which do not serve my higher good, I let them go. And, so I have become softer. I have learned the softest of touch can affect the deepest healing.

To become who we are meant to be means to let go of who we once were. The need for others to define us ceases to exist. We can stand tall with pride, wearing the scars of our experiences and our grey as evidence of our being. With grace and acceptance, the becoming is effortless. Because we’ve aged does not mean it’s too late to redefine our identities, we are tens of millions of cool, impactful, self-aware women.

Let us embrace our wisdom, honouring our value and worthiness to pave the way for the coming generations. Let us make becoming ageless the fashion to follow. Let us be the #socialtrendworthfollowing.