MUSIC

MUSIC Cory Weeds books his faves for Jazz @ the Bolt

by Steve Newton

Cory Weeds is well known in Vancouver jazz circles as a concert promoter, record-label boss, and former club owner, not to mention a pretty decent sax player. He came by his love of jazz honestly, as his father is an amateur guitarist who had a lot of jazz records playing in the house.

At first, the young Weeds took a rebellious stance, attempting to dislike jazz just because his father loved it so much, but that didn’t work.

“I tried to really hate jazz,” he says on the line from his Burnaby home, “but eventually, man, it just got to me. It got to me quite seriously in about Grade 10 or 11, and then it really took off in Grade 12 and I never looked back. Jazz just excites me more than any other kind of music, and I’ve been very lucky. I’ve managed to have a career doing nothing but jazz.”

Weeds owned and operated the Cellar Jazz Club near Main and Broadway for 14 years, and he has released more than 300 recordings via the Cellar Music Group. After the Cellar closed in 2014, he continued as a diligent promoter of local jazz musicians, booking talent at Frankie’s Jazz Club since 2016.

When asked to name his Vancouver sax heroes, the first person that comes to Weeds’s mind is Ross Taggart. Sadly, Taggart succumbed to cancer in 2013 at the age of 45, but Weeds has a number of other faves that are still active on the scene.

“I was really disappointed that I was away and missed Campbell Ryga last weekend,” he says. “And it’s always exciting to see Brad Turner and his quartet—Brad’s always doin’ really good stuff. I miss Oliver Gannon a lot, too. He’s been struggling with some hand issues, but it’s always special when he graces the stage. And there’s a young guy named John Lee who’s a multi-instrumentalist, and I love playing with him, but I also love just watching his bands. So there’s a lot of incredible talent here.”

Weeds’s latest major effort to promote the city’s top jazz artists and showcase their skills will be Jazz @ the Bolt, a three-day music festival that runs this weekend (February 11 to 13) at the Shadbolt Centre for the Arts. It’s a venue that’s near and dear to Weeds’s heart.

“I was born and raised in Burnaby,” he says, “so I watched that centre develop since the early days. I was reached out to by them to start a jam session, and we had really great success with that. Then I started kinda working as a contractor there and doing four or five shows a year.

“The setting is beautiful,” he raves, “right off of Deer Lake. It’s a nice centre with high ceilings, and they’ve got many spaces. They’ve got the James Cowan Theatre, which seats about 300, and they’ve got a Studio Theatre, which is about 185. And then they’ve got some rooms that you can open up and make it bigger.”

Weeds feels that the layout of the 35,000-square-foot Shadbolt Centre makes it particularly well suited to the “jazz walk” type of event he envisions Jazz @ the Bolt to be.

“The concept of the festival is that it’s a roaming festival,” he says, “so we have bands starting at 11, 11:15, and 11:30, and then once that 11:30 set is done around 12:15, there’s a little break and then it all starts again. So the idea is, you may come to the festival and you may not get to hear one band because that room will be full, so you just go to the next room, and then when somebody leaves the other room, you can go in.

“Now, COVID has made it a little bit difficult, because if we don’t have a certain amount of people in the centre, the roaming concept doesn’t work as well. But the way I’m kind of viewing it is that, look, Vancouver needs this festival. We need something to celebrate. So however it’s gonna work, it’s gonna work.”

Weeds has booked New York City’s Mike LeDonne and the Groover Quartet for the opening-night performance on Friday, when it will be joined by a big band composed of 13 local jazz heavyweights. As well as Weeds himself on baritone sax, the lineup will include tenor saxophonist Dave Say, acoustic bassist John Lee, alto saxophonists Steve Kaldestad and James Danderfer; trombonists Rod Murray, Brad Shigeta, Jim Hopson, and Jeremy Berkman; and trumpeters Brad Turner, Chris Davis, Derry Byrne, and Jocelyn Waugh.

Although Weeds is thrilled about taking part in Jazz @ the Bolt’s opening gig, there’s plenty more that he’s recommending people see.

“On Saturday, I’m really excited about the Michael Stephenson Quintet,” he says, “Michael’s a very talented young man. I’m also excited about Alex Claffy’s quintet with Nicole Glover, a great saxophonist who’s really tearing up the scene in New York City. And then, locally speaking, on that day, Steve Kaldestad, who’s a dear friend of mine. I always love hearing him; he’s one of my favourite saxophone players.”

Sunday’s program features an allCanadian lineup, and Weeds notes that it wasn’t difficult at all finding enough worthy Canuck jazz acts to fill the bill.

“It’s no problem,” he says. “We’re very lucky in Canada. The Ostara Project, the all-female collective co-led by Jodi Proznick, that’s gonna be really neat. It’s always nice when you can bring seven talented women together. Black Gardenia is a really cool band, and Blue Moon Marquee is fantastic. Amanda Tosoff’s gonna do a trio gig, and she’s a wonderful pianist.

“That’s the beauty about being able to book a festival, ’cause you can book all the stuff that you want to hear.” g

Saxophonist and entrepreneur Cory Weeds has been promoting jazz in the city for many years, with his latest project being a three-day jazz festival at Burnaby’s Shadbolt Centre for the Arts.

J

azz FEST BOSS CHECKS OUT

d THE COASTAL Jazz & Blues Society (CJBS) announced on February 4 that Rainbow Robert (above in photo by Massimiliano Lachini) has stepped down as the managing director of Vancouver’s annual jazz festival. In a release, CJBS executive director Nina Horvath said the society will feel the loss of Robert.

“Rainbow will be deeply missed by staff and the jazz community,” Horvath said, “and it is our goal to continue to uphold the standard of artistic excellence she has brought to the organization.”

No reason was given for the departure of the longtime employee. CJBS was founded as a charitable arts organization in 1985 and has produced the TD Vancouver International Jazz Festival since 1986.

Robert held the jazz festival’s managing-director position since 2018 but has worked for the fest since 1998, mainly in programming. She replaced fest cofounder Ken Pickering after he retired in 2017. Pickering died in August 2018.

CJBS had the following to say about Robert in the release: “Her keen ear and expansive vision has been instrumental in the growth, recognition, and success of the TD Vancouver International Jazz Festival across the country and around the globe.

“Rainbow brought great passion and inspiration to her work and improved musical life in this city for both festivalgoers and artists,” the release continued. “She forged new relationships by developing in-depth collaborations between local and international artists, and helped shine a light on the magnitude of musical talent in Vancouver.”

The nonprofit noted the Robert led its education and outreach activities, “including collaborative initiatives with the Berklee Institute of Jazz and Gender Justice and the International Institute for Critical Studies in Improvisation”.

Meanwhile, the CJBS said that it will be “engaging in a thoughtful, transparent, and equitable process to determine the future artistic leadership of the organization”. The the 35th annual jazz fest is scheduled to take place this year, from June 24 to July 3, and it will be preceded by this month’s IronFest 2 (February 18 to 20). g by Martin Dunphy

MUSIC / SAVAGE Chalcedony’s “Permanent Marker” gets tears flowing

by Mike Usinger

“I f only tears could fuel a fucking time machine.” Stop and think about that line for a second. Imagine everything you could not only have done differently, but all the life mistakes you’d be able to undo. Relationships. Hairdos. Career choices. That time you sunk $3,000 into MySpace shares when everyone was telling you Facebook was the more sensible option.

And that time spending $122,000 on a reno-worthy East Van character home seemed like insanity. So even though you had the down payment, you continued to rent in a three-storey walk-up on Beach Avenue because it was two blocks from English Bay, and stumbling distance from the Marine Club.

“If only tears could fuel a fucking time machine” indeed.

That line comes from “Permanent Marker” by Chalcedony, whose debut EP—Do You Really Wanna Know What the Fuck Goes On Inside My Head—arrives this spring. Chances are you know singerguitarist Chalcedony and bassist Gillian Callander from their previous tours of duty in the Vancouver indie underground, including stints with Junior Major and Joyce Collingwood.

That the two know their postpunk history is reflected in “Permanent Marker”. Chalcedony balances a dark yet winning vulnerability with an attitude as effortlessly badass as Courtney Love and Kelley Deal in the Lollapalooza years. On the back end, Callander anchors things with a bass line that nails the sweet spot between the collected works of Carlos Dengler and Vancouver’s late and entirely great the Organ.

Visually, the Chris Rekrutiak–directed “Permanent Marker” throws back to the past on a number of fronts: clawfoot bathtubs, five-panel Craftsman doors, pedestal sinks, Nuggets-era dresses and zebra-skin shirts, and an opening scene that may or may not be a nod to the late great Laura Palmer—at least where the makeup is concerned.

And speaking of Laura Palmer, man, if only tears could fuel a fucking time machine, because that would mean getting the chance to go back to when Twin Peaks was the newest and hottest thing on television.

And to make up for the fact you could have seen Hole at the Town Pump just days after the release of Live Through This, but instead went to Bootsauce at 86 Street.

And getting the opportunity to say goodbye to people you missed saying goodbye to when it mattered.

Think about it. But, unless you want the tears to really start flowing, don’t think about it too hard. g

Gillian Callander and Chalcedony prove that static can make more than balloons stick to walls.

‘Permanent Marker’ throws back to the past on a number of fronts.

You can check out more of Chalcedony at https:// open.spotify.com/artist/01wlZpjdZMAZl7PuDo32Xf.

Some out-there kinks require a bit of restraint by Dan Savage b I’M A 40-YEAR-OLD bi guy and I’m really into drinking cum. I say “drinking” and not “swallowing” because I’m talking about glassfuls. I make and sell videos of me drinking large amounts of cum. Since I don’t have a stable of guys to supply me, I use frozen cum.

It used to just be my own that I saved up over time, but I met a guy online a couple years ago that’s into feeding his cum to people like myself. I have some health concerns about it. First, could STIs survive the freezing-and-thawing process? I’ve already had a few glasses of his cum, so the boat has sailed regarding my current “cumbull”, as they’re known in my niche sexual community, but I’m looking at getting more donors.

Second question, how much cum is safe to drink? And digest? It does give me an upset stomach, but I can usually handle that. But am I damaging myself by not taking my body’s prompt to throw it up?

From the research I’ve done, it seems the zinc in cum is the biggest worry. Just 100 mls or so contains your daily required intake of zinc and too much zinc can have some negative health effects. I’m aiming to drink at least a litre in one video and don’t feel comfortable discussing this with my doctor. Could you contact a doctor for me?

ER doctor Josh Trebach tells one of Dan’s readers that if he wants to go ahead with his plan to drink a litre of semen, he needs to be assured of the donor(s) STI status. Photo by Twitter.

P.S. I would’ve called into the podcast, but my sister is a listener and I would rather not share this info with her.

Before anyone can jump in the comments and post “FAKE” in all caps, CC enclosed his Twitter handle in a post-postscript, which allowed me to verify that he’s for real. What’s more, a quick scroll through CC’s Twitter revealed that he’s not the only person out there methodically acquiring and chugging enormous amounts of semen. As it turns out, there’s a thriving community of “cumbulls” online who enjoy supplying, and even more cumguzzlers like CC who enjoy imbibing. (Sadly, CC asked me not to publish his Twitter handle, so you’ll just have to trust me: this letter is not a fake.)

Now, before I bring in the medical expert you hoped to hear from, CC, I wanna say this to my other readers: nothing about CC’s kink appeals to me personally—it looks like way too much of a good thing—but CC and his cumbulls aren’t hurting anyone. Indeed, the world would be a better place if it had more Canadians like CC in it and fewer Canadians like those fascist assholes in trucks currently blocking border crossings.

Okay! Let’s meet this week’s guest expert!

“It seems like there are two questions here,” said Dr. Josh Trebach, an emergency medicine physician and a medical toxicology fellow in New York City. “The first question is the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STIs), the second is, ‘How much is too much?’ Is it safe to drink large volumes of semen?”

Trebach looked at the medical literature, CC, but found it “extremely lacking” for individuals who freeze, thaw, and drink large amounts of semen. Yours is an underserved (except when you’re being overserved) and unrepresented (except on Twitter) population.

“But we do know that sexually transmitted infections (STIs) can be transmitted from performing oral sex,” said Trebach. “This in-

from previous page cludes syphilis, herpes, gonorrhea, chlamydia, and HIV. And while it’s tempting to assume the freezing and thawing process would create a less welcoming environment for STIs, there’s evidence to suggest some STIs survive the freezing process quite well. Gonorrhea can survive temperatures lower than -300 degrees Fahrenheit for over a year. Chlamydia has also been able to survive after being frozen.’’

Now, STIs are not spontaneously generated when semen comes into contact with saliva, of course, nor are they spontaneously generated when someone packs their cum in dry ice and ships it off to a stranger they met on the Internet. “But given the lack of data for those that freeze, thaw, then drink semen, I would encourage anyone doing this to err on the side of caution and assume practically the same risks as performing oral sex,” Trebach said. “This means knowing the STI status of you and your partner(s) and engaging in appropriate prevention strategies, e.g., PrEP and frequent STI testing.”

So, let’s say your cumbull has been tested and is currently STI-free and in a monogamous relationship with someone who has also been tested. Or tested, STI-free, and supplying his semen to men and women like you is his sole sexual outlet. If that’s the case, CC, you shouldn’t let an exaggerated fear of contracting an STI stop you from pursuing this pleasure. That said, CC, the more cumbulls you add to your herd, the greater your risk for contracting an STI becomes. Obviously. So for safety’s sake where STIs are concerned, you should stick with your trusted supplier, even if that means longer waits between shoots.

As for your plan to drink an entire litre of cum in one video…

“So, how much is too much?” said Trebach. “In toxicology, we use a concept called the ‘median lethal dose’, or ‘LD50’, to describe how toxic a given substance is. The LD50 is, basically, the quantity of a substance that would kill 50% of people who were exposed to it—or in CC’s case, ingested it. It would be theoretically possible to extrapolate from human or animal data on the lethal dose of each individual ingredient (such as zinc) to come up with the LD50 of semen, but this would be theoretical and imprecise.”

And now a little science, a little math, and a little guesswork (from me, not Trebach): zinc is a trace element that’s important for our immune systems, metabolic functions, our body’s ability to heal wounds, and the production of important enzymes. Adult males should ingest about 11 milligrams of zinc daily, a single teaspoon of semen contains about three percent of that, and there are 203 teaspoons in a litre. So, if you were to drink an entire litre of semen, CC, you would be ingesting roughly six times your daily recommended allowance of zinc, or 66 milligrams. Assuming you don’t have some other, undiagnosed health condition, that’s probably not enough zinc (or semen) to kill you, but it is enough to make you puke.

“My opinion is that if you’re drinking so much of anything that you feel like you’re going to vomit, you should probably cut back, as that may be your body’s way of telling you something is wrong or that there is too much of something present,” Trebach said. “And continuous irritation to your gastrointestinal tract through direct injury, distension, and repeated exposure is not advised.”

And even if there might not be enough zinc in a litre of semen to kill you—or enough citric acid or fructose or potassium or cooties—that doesn’t mean it’s safe to quickly ingest a litre of it.

“An age-old adage in the world of toxicology is that the dose makes the poison,” said Trebach. “Even things that may seem benign— water, candy, semen—can be deadly with a high enough dose, and you can have ‘toxic’ effects well below a lethal dose. In one litre of semen, there’s enough sodium to surpass the recommended daily intake of sodium, and that’s just not really healthy.”

People have actually died from drinking too much water, CC. It’s rare, but it happens. And it stands to reason that if a person can die after drinking three to four litres of water over the course of a few hours—which, again, has happened—it wouldn’t surprise anyone to learn a person died after drinking an entire litre of semen over 140 seconds, i.e., the maximum length of a video clip posted to Twitter. You say you don’t want your sister finding out about your kink after hearing your voice on my podcast, CC, and I have to assume you don’t want your sister—or the rest of your family—finding out about your kink after hearing from the coroner.

I have a lot of mottos, CC, and one of them is, “Moderation in all things—including moderation.” Your kink is not my kink, CC, but

your kink is okay, as the saying goes, and your kink is about the consumption of immoderate amounts of semen. But I would advise you, as I have advised many others, to be moderate about how often you’re immoderate. In your case, that means carefully choosing your cumbulls, puking when your body tells you to puke, and cutting back on the semen if your 9258604 Canada Corporation dba Metropolitan Moversis looking for a Moving Van Drivers Supervisor. Perm, F/T (40 h/w), Wage $26.00 per/h Requirements: high school, good English, 1-2 years of experience. Main duties: 1097130 B.C. LTD. dba Banter Room is HIRING Line Cooks. Perm, F/T, Shifts, Weekends. Wage: $19.00 /hour. Requirements: Exp. body needs to puke each time you do this. Otherwise, enjoy. But the final word goes to Trebach, who Supervise activities of employees, assign workers to duties; Co-ordinate activities of drivers and movers; Prepare work schedules, control and monitor routes; Recommend on hiring new employees and train staff; Ensure health and min. 1-2 years, good English, high school Main duties: Prepare and cook complete meals or individual dishes, Set up and stock food items and supplies, Operate standard kitchen equipment, Ensure cleanliness and hygiene is wanted to add a quick disclaimer: he hasn’t examined you or taken a full history and physical, CC, so he doesn’t want you to think safety regulations are followed; Schedule repairs and maintenance works;Order supplies;Resolve work relatedproblems, maintain reports. Company’s business address and job location: 1102 -1068 Hornby St. Vancouver BC V6Z2Y7 maintained, Maintain inventory and records of food, supplies and equipment, Perform kitchen work station opening and closing duties, Supervise kitchen staff and helpers. Job location and business address: this is true medical advice. “And I know talking with a doctor about some of these issues is hard, but I like to think things are getting Please apply by e-mail: vancouvermetropolitan@gmail.com 1039 Mainland St., Vancouver, BC, V6B 5P9. Please apply by e-mail: better. Today’s new doctors are, in my opinemployment.banterroom@gmail.com ion, much more comfortable and open when answering questions about sexual health. Although some questions may be niche, we physSIBER FACADE GROUP INC is hiring a Procurement Manager. Perm, F/T. icians owe our patients respect and confidentiality, as we are here to help them, not make Wage: 45 $/hr. Requirements: 2-3 years of exp. A college diploma, Excellent English judgments. Please find a doctor that you can Main duties: Plan, manage and oversee purchasing activity of the company, Develop and implement procurement policies and discuss these questions with, so they can give you the best possible recommendations.”procedures, Control the budget; Evaluate suppliers, Negotiate policies with suppliers You can follow Dr. Josh Trebach on Twitter Evaluate and control contracts, Attend meetings, trade shows and conferences, Maintain and review records, Interview and hire new @jtrebach. PS Good news, everybody! CC responded personnel, Process claims against suppliers Company’s business address and job location: to my email asking if he would allow me to Unit 230, 7270 Market Crossing, Burnaby BC, V5J 0A3. Please apply by email to hr@siberconstruction.com share his Twitter handle here. Go have a look at @zoesixxx. g

Amra Bakery Inc. o/a European Breads Bakery is hiring Bakers. Shifts, Weekends, Perm, F/T. Wage: $15.20 /hr Requirements: Good English, exp. as a baker is an asset, high school education. On-the-job training will be provided by employer. Main duties: Measure and combine ingredients according to recipes; Prepare dough; Prepare and operate equipment for baking; Set and monitor temperatures and bake items; Ensure product freshness and food safety; Keep work area clean and tidy. Company’s business address and job location: 4320 Fraser St, Vancouver, BC V5V 4G3 Please apply by e-mail: european.breads.amra@gmail.com

Follow Dan on Twitter @FakeDanSavage. Email: questions@savagelovecast.net. Columns, podcasts, books, merch, and more at www.savage.love!

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is currently seeking Appliance Service Technicians, Greater Vancouver, BC. F/T, Perm (40 h/w). Wage: $22.50 /h Main duties: Review work tasks; Refer to product manuals and disassemble appliance; Diagnose faults and conduct appliance assessment; Adjust, repair or replace parts and components; Perform routine maintenance work;Reassemble appliance, ensure that it is working properly; Report to the Manager and prepare documentation. Requirements: High school, completion of apprenticeship program or 2-3 years of work experience, good English. Business address and job location: 2120 -950 Seaborne Ave, Port Coquitlam, BC V3E 3G7 Please apply by e-mail: electrafixappliance@gmail.com

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is looking for a Procurement Specialist. F/T, Perm. Wage: $29.50 /h, Extended medical benefit package. Duties: Solicit and analyze vendor quotes; Place purchase orders, establish delivery schedules; Negotiate and evaluate supply and service contracts; Prepare specifications and documents; Monitor compliance with contractual terms and conditions; Monitor delivery dates, resolve problems; Conduct cost benefit analysis for alternative products; Respond to inquiries and complaints; Maintain and review records. Requirements:1-2 years of experience in procurement.College diploma Business address and job location: 19055 Airport Way, Unit 119, Pitt Meadows, BC V3Y 0G4. Please apply by e-mail: hr.highdeal@gmail.com

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9258604 Canada Corporation

dba Metropolitan Movers is looking for

Moving Van Drivers Supervisor.

Perm, F/T (40 h/w), Wage -$26.00 per/h Requirements: high school, good English, 1-2 years of experience. Main duties: Supervise activities of employees, assign workers to duties; Co-ordinate activities of drivers and movers; Prepare work schedules, control and monitor routes; Recommend on hiring new employees and train staff; Ensure health and safety regulations are followed; Schedule repairs and maintenance works;Order supplies;Resolve work relatedproblems, maintain reports. Company’s business address and job location:1102 -1068 Hornby St. Vancouver BC V6Z2Y7

Please apply by e-mail: vancouvermetropolitan@gmail.com 1097130 B.C. LTD.

dba Banter Room

is HIRING Line Cooks. Perm, F/T, Shifts, Weekends. Wage: $19.00 /hour. Requirements: Exp. min. 1-2 years, good English, high school. Main duties: Prepare and cook complete meals or individual dishes, Set up and stock food items and supplies, Operate standard kitchen equipment, Ensure cleanliness and hygiene is maintained, Maintain inventory and records of food, supplies and equipment, Perform kitchen work station opening and closing duties, Supervise kitchen staff and helpers. Job location and business address: 1039 Mainland St., Vancouver, BC, V6B 5P9. Please apply by e-mail: employment.banterroom@gmail.com

SIBER FACADE GROUP INC

is hiring a Procurement Manager. Perm, F/T. Wage: 45 $/hr. Requirements: 2-3 years of exp.A college diploma, Excellent English Main duties: Plan, manage and oversee purchasing activity of the company, Develop and implement procurement policies and procedures, Control the budget; Evaluate suppliers, Negotiate policies with suppliers Evaluate and control contracts, Attend meetings, trade shows and conferences, Maintain andreview records, Interview and hire new personnel, Process claims against suppliers Company’s business address and job location: Unit 230, 7270 Market Crossing, Burnaby BC, V5J 0A3. Please apply by email to: hr@siberconstruction.com

Amra Bakery Inc. o/a European Breads Bakery is hiring Bakers. Shifts, Weekends, Perm, F/T. Wage: $15.20 /hr Requirements: Good English, exp. as a baker is an asset, high school education. On-the-job training will be provided by employer.Main duties: Measure and combine ingredients according to recipes; Prepare dough; Prepare and operate equipment for baking; Set and monitor temperatures and bake items; Ensure product freshness and food safety; Keep work area clean and tidy. Company’s business address and job location: 4320 Fraser St, Vancouver, BC V5V 4G3 Please apply by e-mail: european.breads.amra@gmail.com

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