The Poor Childs
to be
The Flying
Irishman’s
Stag do • Dublin • August 2011
Hotel Address
Flight Details
Kinlay House 2 -12 Lord Edward Street, Dublin, Our e Ireland awesoml hote D2
Inbound: Flight FR2433 Depart: Luton Airport Day : Friday 17th July Depart : 10:15am Arrive : 11.25am Inbound: Flight FR2433 Depart: Dublin Airport Day : Monday 20th july Depart : 17:15am Arrive : 1825am
Gaelic sayings for when you are plastered!! I'm in love with you táim i ngrá leat Fuck up Crab suas
iess please A pint of gunn , le do thoil Pionta Guinness
I suppose a ride is out of the question? Is dócha nach bhfuil seans ar bith ann?
of south Allen Beedie ry go re G cause you r M 're here be u yo y, le ks blin. Let me sheddoc holiday in Du on ' e 'r u yo think n't no FUCKIN now, this ai e a is 'r u th yo u d, yo e ll te concern I'm as r fa s holiday. A um. cking shit sc piece of fu train to be kin' here to of Fiona You are fuc ill take care w at th an the m be the best e going to 'r u e Yo . e lif for make you th 're going to because we ng best. be motherfucki n boys will your chose d more an he lf T e s. ys u M will hate u yo , u yo ar hard on u will le n. the more yo s, but u te ha you ’re nothing u learn, you at yo a il on nt Fi u r t fo Bu y, cryin’ ss pu ss -a faggotty ur pillows. y humpin’ yo n’ night, and dr motherfocki home as big, d an ks c You will go ro war, eating as A machines of will go home u Yo . ds on am le! di ru n’ t ti no sh*t ill shall But you st REAL MAN.
Nick G The Unfortunate Best man to Allen Beedie!
Nick Gregory Aka Mr Squiggles
Ben Palmer Aka Van Wilder
Fegus Cooke Aka Dollface
Jimmy Aka Cunny Jim
Russell Cooke Aka Mr Squiggles
Bassim Baz Aka Van Wilder
Henry McDougal Aka Dollface
Tom Bastock Aka Badcock
Do not underestimate this little fucker! He may be the smallest BUT the of most lethal drinker of us all. He'll outpace, outdrink us all!!
Palmer sucks donkey dick! He once said he wanted to kill the sexiest person alive! But suicide's a crime he says!
A nice guy, when it is not his turn to get the rounds in. An artful dodger, and never admits when he is wrong. Everyone, flick his ears when he is not watching!
Warning!! Gives one back better than what you give. Dangerous Mofo to be around after a few let alone none! Will give you the Screwdriver if given the Chance!
A real casanova, has a budding romance with Palmer when he's had a few!
twinkle twinkle little star, point me to the nearest bar
Handle with Care! We all need to watch out his drink intake. He'll be Sure to throw punches into thin air but will hit a few noses I'm sure. He already apologises if he does so!
The young fighter had a hungry look, the kind you get from not eating for a while.
Saturday
Dammit!
Go karting At Kylemore Industrial Estate
Saturday
The to-do-list which must be fulfilled before departure to the homeland Failure to fulfil this will result in Punishments decided by the Weights & measures Committee.
Shooting Competition in the wild forest of Tibradden Wood (Pine Forest) Complimentary Beers
Friday & Sunday O’Connell Street pub Crawl Auld Triangle
Forum Bar
The Big Tree
Bond
Kiely's
Conways
Life
The Church Cafe Bar
Flowing Tide
Murky Blues The Bachelor Inn The Belvedere
The Grand Central The Oval Bar The Sackville Lounge Welcome Inn
Do the chicken dance on a table
two Down of s t in p ess Guinn
Go up to 2 random guys and say...... 'PHIL! BOB! I HAVENT SEEN U IN SOOO LONG!!' Then hug them!
o tw f o s n w s Do int nes p in Gu
Always ask permission to take a leak
(names drawn out of a hat on daily basis) 1 Judge • 1 Weights & measures Committee • 1 Court -martial Committee
Wise up
Drinks are restricted to beer, straight shots or two-part cocktails. Drinking commences @ 12 noon Saturday and Sunday. Drink @ your own peril on Monday. Punishments are decided by the weights and measures Committee.
1) Yellow peril - if you get a yellow golf ball in any vessel you are holding, you must down the contents (3 mins max) 2) Drink with the clock - depending which half of the clock the minute hand is in, you must drink with the corresponding hand. 01 to 30 mins - right, 31 to 00 mins - left. (General to pick which half of the hour) 3) Thumbmaster - last person to see the thumb on the table must down the drink 4) Pub Golf (rules overleaf)
5)
Trump Cards 6)
Stags on Parade -
Stags on Parade At any time during exercises, the Groom can call for 'Stags on Parades' to inspect his troops. Each member is expected to assemble in front of the Groom and produce their Booklet and their must-haves. Failure and/or last person to do so will incur a punishment as decided by the weight & Measures committee, with input from the Groom (The Groom cannot participate if related to Dares) Pub Golf This is an exercise to be undertaken by you all. We will play a nine hole golf course. Each 'hole' will be a beverage as agreed beforehand. A couple of holes will have a designated hazard - either a water hazard or sand hazard. Water hazard - you cannot go to the toilet for the duration we’re in the pub playing that hole. Sand Hazard - you must drink a shot of your choice in addition to the drink you already have at that hole. The number of times it takes for you to finish your drink is your score for the hole. Scorecard provided.
Stags of Dublin - you are expected to bring along your Musthaves! that will identify your participation of this Stag Do! You were told beforehand to bring these items. There's no excuse. These items are as follows:
Toy car
The Poor Childs
to be
ying The Fl hman’s Iris
Stag do • Dublin
• August 2011
t
Bookle
If you losE your mobile
If you lose your passport
Van Wilder
+(44) 7815 890290
Knob Jockey
+(44) 7834 979425
Etonian
+(44) 7980 757620
Dollface
+(44) 7779 362477
Address: 29 Merrion Road Ballsbridge Dublin 4
emergency services In case of emergencies outside office hours (17.00 - 09.00): In severe emergencies only (eg: the arrest, death or serious injury of a British national) please ring the Embassy switchboard on +353 1 2053700.
Peg Golf Tee
Failure to produce any of the above items when the Groom calls for ‘Stags on Parade’ will incur a penalty where you must drink 25% of your drink for each item not shown.
K!! FUUUCC my 's Where t!! r passpo
Try not to get yourself too fucked up & lose your passport or mobile phones!!
We hope you have as much fun as possible but...
Please Drink Responsibly
"w h a t g o e s o n in Dublin s t a y s i n D u blin.... " Delays possible!
thehang va.com thehangova 2011