Inlander 12/13/2018 by The Inlander

DECEMBER 13-19, 2018 | ROCKIN’ READERS SINCE 1993

GIFT GUIDE BOOKS, MUSIC AND GAMES PAGE 30

LET IT SNOW!

SNOWLANDER: IT’S ALL DOWNHILL FROM HERE PAGE 34 SUPPLEMENT TO THE INLANDER

Seriously,

MYLES KENNEDY is the biggest music star to come out of Spokane since Bing Crosby

BY DAN NAILEN PAGE 22

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BEFORE

EDITOR’S NOTE

utting MYLES KENNEDY — someone, depending on your tastes, you may be unfamiliar with — in the same sentence as Bing Crosby is, on its face, bold. (Or is it crazy?!) This is “White Christmas” Bing we’re talking about, the “most admired man alive,” national polls declared in 1948, placing him ahead of Jackie Robinson and the pope. But after reading culture editor Dan Nailen’s riveting profile of Kennedy (page 22), there’s no quibbling that he’s a major-league rock star who’s played to millions of fans around the world (while continuing to live in the Lilac City). Perhaps the most compelling story line (besides the typical localboy-makes-good trope) is about the hold music has had over him, through turmoil and triumph. “I don’t want to say music ‘saved’ me because that sounds kind of dramatic,” Kennedy says, “but it gave me a purpose and helped me figure out who I was, and in that sense it did save me.” — JACOB H. FRIES, Editor

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ROXANNE BEST My favorite local celebrity is Clare Painter from American Grit [a reality show on FOX]. Why? She won in 2017 and she’s an amazing athlete and she’s my friend.

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Model Citizen George H.W. Bush’s life is a reminder of the good we can do when we rely on civility and kindness BY GEORGE NETHERCUTT

s accolades continue to pour in for President George H.W. Bush, America’s 41st president, it’s appropriate to add my own thoughts. It’s important to note that America’s 41st president was from a different era — a time when cordiality and respect for others prevailed, and when compromise for the good of the American nation was acceptable. He was experienced — perhaps the most publicly experienced president ever. A former county party chairman, congressman, U.N. ambassador, director of the CIA, Republican National Committee chairman, envoy to China, vice president and president, Bush led with courage, grace and conviction. He’s been called “the best one-term president” America has ever had. George H.W. Bush was only the second president whose son followed in his footsteps as president — the other was John Adams, whose son, John Quincy Adams, was elected America’s sixth president. The 43rd president, George W. Bush, was elected in 2002. His father never attempted to influence the 43rd president, as far as we know, offering instead abundant moral support. The 43rd president’s mother, Barbara, seemed more political than her husband and was frequently outspoken on behalf of her children.

resident Bush 41 visited Spokane at least twice, once as he ran for president in 1988, the other time in 2000 when he appeared at Spokane Falls Community College at a political campaign event supporting candidates up for election that year. In fact, Bush’s first stop after being nominated for president by his party in 1988 was our own Riverfront Park. In his appearance, he repeated his now infamous remarks, “Read my lips: no new taxes.” Even though there may have been other reasons, Bush’s critics latched on to the no-new-taxes pledge after Bush raised taxes to balance the budget. He was crucified politically by both Republicans and Democrats, and he lost the election in 1992. Ross Perot entered that presidential race, and even though he only garnered 19 million votes, and won no states, the majority of those votes likely would have gone to Bush and not Bill Clinton. As a result, Clinton became America’s 42nd president by a plurality. The 1988 Spokane trip was memorable also because, as Spokane County Republican chairman, I was chosen to greet Mr. and Mrs. Bush. Gracious as always, they rode to the stage with my daughter Meredith, then an 8-year-old, and they had a great conversation during the Riverfront Park train ride. My other experience with President Bush involved a ride to the airport

from the community college. The ride was memorable because, though it was small talk, I recall the 41st president’s genuineness and outward nature showed through. Bush’s son, President George W. Bush, was courteous like his father, staying until the end of any political rally to shake every hand of those who waited. They both had impressive senses of humor, often laughing at themselves as well as with others. When actor/impersonator Dana Carvey was introduced as President Bush in 1992 in the White House, with Bush’s approval, Bush went along graciously with the gag, letting Carvey impersonate him effectively. Bush didn’t need to guide all attention to himself by putting Carvey down. It was a sign of his selfconfidence as well as his selflessness.

he 41st president also had a reputation for courtesy to the powerless and for taking the time to write handwritten notes to friends as well as to others whose acquaintance he made in his many exploits and whose paths he had crossed. He and Mrs. Bush raised their children well. When my mother passed away in November of 2009, President George W. Bush wrote a condolence letter, even though he had left the White House and the presidency in January 2009.

“…Bush’s first stop after being nominated for president by his party in 1988 was our own Riverfront Park.” Vice President Mike Pence gave a beautiful tribute to President George H.W. Bush on Dec. 3 in the Rotunda of the Capitol — perhaps Pence’s finest speech. He blended beautifully the poignant with the practical, mentioning a note Mr. Bush had sent him about his fighter-pilot son making arrested landings on the aircraft carrier USS George H.W. Bush, wishing Pence’s son ceiling and visibility unlimited (CAVU). They were words any father would be proud to receive. In our philosophically divided country, all Americans can properly wish for a return to the civility and genuine kindness portrayed by President George H.W. Bush throughout his extensive public life. He can serve as an example for all to emulate — an emulation that could prevent today’s political infighting. n

DO SOMETHING!

Don't forget your favorite stocking stuffers.

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SANTA EXPRESS

The annual holiday retail store allows local children to shop for affordable holiday gifts for family and friends, with proceeds benefiting the Vanessa Behan Crisis Nursery, a safe shelter for kids who are in crisis situations. Open to ages 4-12; all items are priced between 50 cents and $8. Open through Sun, Dec. 23; Mon-Fri from 11 am-8 pm, Sat from 10 am-8 pm and Sun from 11 am-6 pm. River Park Square, second level, 808 W. Main. santaexpress.org (624-3945)

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This family-friendly event was created to unite the Garland District and Spokane community for a day filled with food, festive activities, entertainment and more. Event contributions support Fostering WA, a nonprofit supporting foster parents and their children in the Spokane area. Free admission. Sat, Dec. 15 from 10:30 am-4:30 pm. Garland District. bit.ly/2qKg1ho

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HARMONICS FOR HAPPINESS: MAKE MUSIC DAY

An open-to-all community music jam with the “Magic Bus Music Bash” to kick things off. The annual event is part of a national celebration; Spokane is one of 13 cities around the U.S. participating. Also includes a short parade, live visual artists, a winter clothing drive and free hot food and drink for participants. Free. All ages. Fri, Dec. 21 from 3-8 pm. Activities at 100 N. Wall St., downtown Spokane. Makemusicday.org n

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Campbell House Holidays starts Dec 15! northwestmuseum.org/calendar DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 7

COMMENT | HOUSING

CALEB WALSH ILLUSTRATION

A Home for the Holidays I used to look away at people in need — but that’s changed BY INGA LAURENT

am not proud of this, but I used to avert my eyes when encountering someone with cardboard sign in hand, asking for assistance. I evaded glances when noticing someone carting around their belongings. I avoided glimpses, when someone, fallen on hard times, sought interaction. Outward expressions of need always embarrassed me, but it would take me a long time to admit this. In the end, we own all our feelings. Emotions, even those initially ignited by external stimuli, ultimately stem from within — when left unchecked, they become the baggage we carry. Instead of internalizing my problematic responses, I imbued extraneous blame, bringing some

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Though critical in thought of “rugged individualist” notions, my actions often affirmed some version of bootstrap mentality. In this life, I’ve been lauded for living in alignment with normative expectations. At various times, I’ve played roles that reflected these pretenses — “modelminority,” assimilating without expressing anger for wrongs un-atoned, an independent, professional woman, who “doesn’t need a man,” a workaholic never setting boundaries, and a girlfriend, more akin to parent than partner. Luckily, one serendipitous question served as the catalyst for change. During an argument, in a moment of miscommunication and shared desperation, someone asked, “What do you want, Inga?” Shocked, I realized I had no genuine answer. So now I am committed to the daunting challenging of introspection and opening for real connection. Facing need in others used to unnerve me because I had suppressed my own. Seeing someone struggle on the street seemed like the apex of my greatest fears. Becoming clearer about my need — for things like family and home, love and attachment — has been a step forward. I can express gratitude for what I do have and grapple with what’s left unmet, creating healthier solutions. Getting proximate to need has forever altered my relationships. Volunteering with “The Solution is Hours” helped me understand that while at times overwhelming, need doesn’t have to render us powerless. When I am able to look it directly in the eye, I am better able to see its nuance, giving me increased capacity for objectivity and less judgment. Casting aspersions on the speck in another’s eye is certainly easier than confronting our disconcerting American reality, like the facts that two-thirds of us have minimal savings, one crisis away from devastation, that subprime mortgages robbed people of their dream homes, and that despite working hard and doubling-up with family or roommates, housing remains unaffordable as wages stagnate. To progress, we must move past predilections for averting, evading and avoiding. I now know that I can meet my own needs while offering what I have the ability to give in the moment — be it a sandwich, a smile, a sense of connection or my words in an attempt to advocate. This holiday, I only have one wish. I ask that Spokane, my home and this city, join together to ensure that everyone has warmth and shelter, a way to keep safe while we work to find more permanent solutions. n Inga N. Laurent is a local legal educator and a Fulbright scholar. She is deeply curious about the world and its constructs and delights in uncovering common points of connection that unite our shared but unique human experiences.

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Donate goods rather than cash. Garden producing more than you can eat? The Women & Children's Free Restaurant and other hunger organizations will take fresh produce. Spokane Valley Partners is in constant need of diapers, socks and other supplies, Coblentz said. Organize a diaper drive to benefit that organization or another group. Coordinate with the organization to make sure the donations are exactly what it needs. (That goes for any in-kind donation.) Create opportunities. Tesh needs work for its clients. "We have a vocational center, and we're always looking for contracts," Johnson said. The group also has a program that pays wages for short-term first jobs for teens during the summer, but it needs employers willing to hire. Show up. Your presence can make an impact, Coblentz said. If a topic important to you is being discussed at city council or a community meeting, just your being there can help sway decisions.

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COMMENT | FROM READERS

MYTHICAL POLITICS fter the Vote” by Mary Lou Reed (11/29/18) talked about “the

“A

firm red slap” over a hopeful blue wave. Mary shouldn’t be puzzled about why voters in Eastern Washington and North Idaho continue to vote for the elephant. Voting is largely based on myths about one side or the other. Those myths seem to stick to Democrats and roll off Republicans. God, guns and gays has dominated those myths along with immigration and support for the military. Democrats are godless gays LETTERS who want to take your guns, defund Send comments to the military and want open borders. editor@inlander.com. Republicans love white Christianity, want everyone to be armed, support “traditional” marriages that frequently end in divorce, want the military to fight neverending wars, put illegal alien children in cages and believe that gays can be cured. Elections focus on the myths and not on clean water and air, health care, education, transportation, jobs, roads, bridges and energy. Results no longer matter, just the color of the candidate’s mythical politics. PETE SCOBBY Newport, Wash.

Readers respond to a news story about banning single-use plastic bags from Washington retail stores (“Pushing out Plastic,” 12/6/18):

BLAISE BARSHAW HALLELUJAH: When I moved here, it was the first thing I noticed, every store wants to give you a plastic bag for every two items you buy! And to the people whining about “buying” reusable bags, I have never seen anyone bringing their old plastic/paper bags to reuse.

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NAOMI HANVEY: I use reusable bags, but keep in mind that it takes a lot of energy to make them, and most are not biodegradable. You need to use them a lot (and, boy, keep buying new ones) for them to be worth it.

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MARILYN BRADY CAROTHERS: It’s a great idea! Get the plastic out! n

Readers respond to a story on Inlander. com about a social media attack on the Observatory after the bar took a stand against local Proud Boys (12/7/18):

SIMON FRANCIS MOORBY: These idiots (Proud Boys) have been reduced to Internet Warriors. Even their GoPro stunt was a cry for attention. DOECELYN KNEESHAW: What I don’t get is that they say they’re a part of a group that has been known for homophobia and racism, but say that they’re chapter isn’t like that. It doesn’t work that way. ERIKA DEASY: People still believe that crazy mass shitposting in reviews is a legit reflection of a business? Please. That game is lost. n

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EDUCATION

‘Epidemic Proportions’ Kids are vaping at alarming rates, and schools don’t know how to handle it BY WILSON CRISCIONE One in four high school seniors in Spokane County use an e-cigarette, according to the Spokane Regional Health District.

t’s almost like a game. Students, with their silent, easily concealed e-cigarettes are vaping all around the school. School officials, meanwhile, try desperately to stop them — sniffing out the flavors, checking the bathrooms and delivering harsher punishments. But so far it’s a game schools are losing. Students might get caught now and then, but school administrators and public health officials still describe how kids vape — or “Juul,” to some — all over school grounds. They vape in the hallways, in the cafeteria or in the bathroom. They vape during class, staring straight at their teacher and blowing the vapor into the sleeve of their shirt, undetected. They send each other messages on Snapchat of friends vaping in school to laugh at. At Lewis and Clark High School, administrators closed a bathroom because too many kids were vaping in it. “Due to continuous vaping, this bathroom will be closed until further notice,” a piece of paper said. The students mocked it: “Due to an ignorant school system lacking resources we have turned to nicotine to cope with anxiety and stress brought on by your curriculum.” Kids then took a picture and spread it on Snapchat. Yes, for teens, vaping is cool. While youth drug use is down in Spokane County, and youth cigarette use is at an all-time low, the use of e-cigarettes by youth has reached “epidemic proportions,” according to a forthcoming report from the Spokane Regional Health District. About one-in-four high school seniors in Spokane County used an e-cigarette in 2016, the most recent year data is available. The devices are appealing to kids, and not just

because companies like Juul make them easily concealed with flavors that taste like candy. They also lack the horrible smell of a regular cigarette. And they seem safer than cigarettes, though that’s an extremely low bar to meet. For teens, it can be a way to rebel in what they think is a relatively harmless way. “I think that’s really what it is. We want to grow up faster, and we’re not allowed to do this, so we want to do it,” says Cheyenne Jones, an 18-year-old senior at North Central High School. Not Jones, to be clear. Jones, student advisor to the Spokane Public Schools Board of Directors, has resisted the trend. Concerned for her classmates, she’s partnered with the district to find ways to stop it. The district, like those all across the country, is scrambling to keep up. Spokane Public Schools so far has taken a more educational approach when a student is caught vaping. Other districts like Coeur d’Alene Public Schools have taken a strict “Zero Tolerance” policy, slapping kids with a threeday in-school suspension and a $74 fine on first offense. Neither approach, it seems, has yet to overcome the addictive powers of nicotine. “In like 10, 20 years, we’re gonna see the side effects of doing this every day and what happens to someone’s lungs and their body and their mind,” Jones says. “I don’t think kids know how addicting it is.”

ince Jones brought up her concerns with vaping during a school board meeting last month, the district has been exploring the extent of the problem and how to fix it. It’s not new for schools to deal with

these types of things, says Shawn Jordan, director of secondary curriculum for SPS. “I graduated from high school in the early ’80s. Chew was the big thing then. Cigarettes were the big thing,” Jordan says. Yet the vaping devices present a different kind of challenge. Kids can get their nicotine fix anywhere, if they’re sneaky enough. Juul devices, which look like USB storage devices, make that easier. That’s why it’s possible for a student to Juul in class with the teacher left clueless. For Jordan, the prevalence of e-cigarettes has been shocking. Even though it’s easier to conceal, students who are perhaps more brazen with their vaping get caught left and right. In the 2016-17 school year, between Spokane Public Schools and Central Valley School District, there were 212 incidents related to tobacco or vaping. It was a pretty high number at the time, but it doesn’t compare to what schools are seeing today: Between the two districts — after just a few months of this year — there have been 266 incidents. The vast majority involve vaping, not cigarettes, districts say. And it’s not just high school kids. Even elementary school children are vaping. Spokane Public Schools already caught it happening 11 times this year. Washington state law allows for a $103 infraction for kids 16 or older caught vaping. But school resource officers in Spokane Public Schools have resisted issuing such citations. The district is in active discussions about starting to do so. “It’s one that we’re talking about,” Jordan says. ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 13

NEWS | EDUCATION “EPIDEMIC PROPORTIONS,” CONTINUED... “There’s lots of implications to that.” Instead, students serve in-school suspension, or lunch detention. There, they get information aiming to make them think twice about vaping. Still, some students remain skeptical. They know that cigarettes are bad. But e-cigarettes? Kids think they’re better. School officials have a hard time arguing with that, especially with a lack of research out there on the long-term effects of vaping for youth. “That’s what makes it challenging,” Jordan says. “We don’t have the research to back it up. All we can message is that we don’t know and that it potentially could have harmful effects.”

HappHy

18 T ! Carson

14 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

they smoked e-cigarettes instead. That doesn’t necessarily mean cigarette-smoking kids are switching to vaping. Many start with vaping, and some research has shown that those young people are more likely to transition to cigarettes and become smokers. And, in case it wasn’t clear, a lot of kids are vaping. “The sheer amount of e-cig users is as much of a concern [as cigarettes] in and of itself,” says Ashley Beck, SRHD data research scientist.

“The sheer amount of e-cig users is as much of a concern [as cigarettes] in and of itself.”

o what exactly is the problem with kids vaping? There’s the nicotine, for one. For a child’s developing brain, nicotine impacts cognitive development, attention and their ability to comprehend or retain information. Plus, it’s highly addictive — much more so than, say, caffeine, says Paige McGowan, a prevention specialist with the Spokane Regional Health District (SRHD) focusing on tobacco, vaping and marijuana. It can also increase the risk for heart disease. “If the youth just used nicotine, there’d still be cause for concern, just because of how hard it is to quit it,” she says. The bigger questions lie with what else vaping products contain. Some e-cigarettes (notably, not Juul), contain diacetyl, a chemical that studies have linked with a condition called “popcorn lung,” which damages a lung’s airways making it difficult to breathe. But there’s much more diacetyl in actual cigarettes, and even then, research is unclear on if smoking actually causes popcorn lung. Research from Georgetown University has found that not only did cigarette use decline as vaping increased in popularity, but that 6.6 million cigarette smokers could gain 86 million years of life if

At some point, as young e-cigarette users grow older, the recordlow number of cigarette users might trend back up again, Beck says. Either way, there will likely be a generation of children addicted to vaping, and nobody knows exactly what that means. “What’s missing is research on the long-term use of e-cigs, specifically,” Beck says. If parents or students still aren’t convinced, however, then schools have one more card left to play when trying to stop kids from vaping during class: It’s illegal.

hile Spokane Public Schools has so far stuck to education instead of citations for vaping at school, other schools in the county go further. Most other districts in Spokane County, including Central Valley, contract with the Spokane County Sheriff’s Office to provide school resource officers. And they’re no longer holding back when it comes to issuing citations, says Sheriff’s Office public information officer Mark Gregory.

“That kind of talking [education] isn’t necessarily working, so SROs are all going to start taking enforcement action, either through the school and/or writing tickets,” Gregory says. In Coeur d’Alene, the “zero tolerance” policy that calls for a three-day in-school suspension along with a citation came in response to rampant vaping problems. The policy was implemented on Oct. 1, but it remains a major issue. Lake City High School, for example, has issued 38 tickets for vaping (along with the suspension), and that includes five just in the last week, says Coeur d’Alene Public Schools spokesman Scott Maben. Last month, the Food and Drug Administration announced it would restrict access to flavored e-cigarettes. Juul, meanwhile, announced around the same time that it would stop selling its flavored pods except for mint, LETTERS menthol and tobacco flavors. Send comments to Vaping devices present otheditor@inlander.com. er safety challenges, too. If the liquid gets on someone’s skin, it can be extremely dangerous. The larger tank-looking ones called “mods” have been known to explode on occasion. Gregory, with the Sheriff’s Office, says one of the resource officers locally thinks — though he can’t prove — that someone vaping set of a smoke alarm at a school. Ultimately, just as with education, it’s unclear if stricter punishment has deterred any kids from vaping. Jordan, with Spokane Public Schools, says everyone has to remember that this is an addiction kids are dealing with. He says it really comes down to students. If they see a fellow student see something, then they should say something, to them and to an administrator. Jones, the senior at North Central, says she’s tried to speak up when she’s seen a classmate vaping. “I definitely express my opinion,” Jones says. “They don’t take it well. But you know, that’s just how kids are.” n wilsonc@inlander.com

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NEWS | DIGEST

ON INLANDER.COM

NO PBRS OR PBS HERE Some people apparently weren’t happy to hear that downtown Spokane bars won’t be catering to Proud Boys, a right-wing men’s group known for rubbing elbows with groups that have overt ties to white nationalism. In response to that news, internet trolls started leaving FAKE REVIEWS for the Observatory bar, one of those that vocally took a stand against the group. (Owner Tyson Sicilia is pictured above.) But a closer look at the user names and review details — pricey PBR in a place that doesn’t serve it; claims of anti-semitism from an account whose name is an ethnic slur for Jewish people — helps reveal the fakes for what they are. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

16 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

FEATURING NATIONAL NEWS FROM THE NEW YORK TIMES

SHOCKING DECISION Arguing it would not serve the public interest, state regulators blocked the proposed blockbuster SALE OF AVISTA to Canadian-based Hydro One last week.The Washington Utilities and Transportation Commission says the merger would neither protect Spokane-based Avista from financial risk nor provide a benefit to its customers, as required by state law. The proposal would have created the largest investor-owned utilities in North America. Avista would have maintained its headquarters in Spokane and continued to operate under the same name, management and employee structure. But it would have become a subsidiary of Hydro One, which is headquartered in Toronto. Avista executives would have seen a significant chunk of cash had the merger gone through, with Avista CEO Scott Morris alone making nearly $6 million just in stock holdings. Avista and Hydro One plan to ask the state to reconsider its decision. (WILSON CRISCIONE)

THE BEGGS DIFFERENCE After seven years as CITY COUNCIL PRESIDENT, Ben Stuckart (above) is aiming to be mayor. And Councilman Breean Beggs — who was just re-elected to City Council last year — is aiming to replace him. In one sense, Beggs is arguably more ideologically to the left than Stuckart. But ideology isn’t the only metric by which a politician can be measured — and at the local level, it isn’t even necessarily the most important one. The biggest difference between Stuckart and Beggs is more about leadership style and tone. Stuckart is aggressive; Beggs is soft-spoken. Stuckart is passionate and hard-charging, with a flair for the dramatic. Beggs, on the other hand, is a council member who delights in seeking a third way, even when his side has enough votes to push something through. (DANIEL WALTERS)

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NEWS | HOMELESSNESS

Shelter Delayed Did activists push the city of Spokane to establish warming shelters sooner — or actually impede the efforts? BY DANIEL WALTERS

t once, the scene Saturday afternoon summarized the tension and contradictions of downtown Spokane. Couples were taking selfies beside the snowflake props outside the River Park Square shopping mall. Skaters were pirouetting at Riverfront Park’s recently reopened ice ribbon. And across from this, homeless rights activists — including City Councilwoman Kate Burke — had chained themselves in front of City Hall, brandishing pictures of Mayor David Condon Photoshopped as the Grinch as they waited for police to try to evict the residents of the “Camp Hope” homeless encampment. It’s possible that this confrontation could have been avoided. The city knew way back in June that the House of Charity homeless shelter would be dramatically slashing the number of available sleeping spots for single men. But it’s taken until December, nearly half a year, for new shelter spaces to be established. That delay is a failure that’s horrified everyone — including tent-city residents, protesters, businesses, council members, social service workers and city staffers. It’s the kind of failure that has put lives at risk. So what happened? One narrative has gone like this: The city of Spokane started looking for replacement shelters far too late, and it was only after activists lit a “fire under their asses” that the city truly rushed to find the new locations. “The real reason is they sat on their thumbs and waited all this time to do what they were supposed to do,” activist Alfredo LLamedo says. But on Friday, seven floors above the blue tents, the city’s Neighborhood and Business Services Director Dawn Kinder told the Inlander a different story. She says city staffers had been working hard the entire time and that the conduct of the activists, however well-intentioned, actually impeded efforts to find new shelters by sewing confusion and scaring away potential partners. “I understand the protest they believe they’re making outside,” Kinder says. “However, the encampment that has been created? We’ve lost warming center sites since that camp came into place.”

THE END OF “ENDING HOMELESSNESS”

In a way, this summer marked a defeat in Spokane’s grand experiment to end homelessness. Starting in 2016, the city had brought together a network of agencies to provide shelter for any homeless man or woman who needed it, 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Combined with a slew of new apartment complexes for the chronically homeless, officials and housing providers hoped that they’d be able to chip away at homelessness, bit by bit. But the problems started quickly. The city had wanted Spokane Valley and Spokane County to help fund the effort. They didn’t. And the sheer number of

18 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Weeks after city officials hoped new homeless shelters would be online, activists and homeless people erected a tent city outside City Hall. homeless men and women seeking shelter far outstripped expectations. “The House of Charity was built to sleep 109 men only. In the last four months we were sleeping close to 400 [people],” says Rob McCann, executive director of Catholic Charities. “The front of the House of Charity looked like a scene out of Woodstock.” Nearby businesses were furious about the impact — citing vandalism, urine, human feces, threatened customers. Homeless citizens frequently showed up to City Council meetings and explained that they didn’t feel safe at the shelter. This spring, Catholic Charities requested a substantial increase in shelter funding from the city to hire new police officers and janitorial staffers until July 2019, when the city planned to open a major new homeless shelter. But while the city had ratcheted up the House of Charity funding in 2017, it declined this time. On May 23, McCann says, Catholic Charities was formally told the city would not be giving House of Charity 24/7 shelter funding past Sept. 1. If the city was to spend more money, Kinder says, it wanted to get more shelter space out of it. But there was an inherent risk: The city didn’t have any replacement shelters lined up. And they weren’t easy to find. “This wasn’t a baton handoff,” McCann says. “This was trying to hand off an aircraft carrier.”

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

for over 100+ folks and NOT have a plan implemented in the place of that,” Burke wrote to the mayor. That same day, Kelly Keenan, director of the city’s Community, Housing and Human Services Department, presented the outlines of a plan to the council, explaining that the city would soon put out bids to agencies willing to operate temporary warming centers, but that the design was “still in development.” For several council members, that was already too late. “People are suffering and will suffer more,” Coun-

“This wasn’t a baton handoff. This was trying to hand off an aircraft carrier.”

THE MISSING PLANS

Throughout the summer, Councilwoman Lori Kinnear says, council members quickly became frustrated with the lack of communication for how the city would accommodate the 150 newly unsheltered homeless men. “‘What’s your plan? What’s your plan?’” Kinnear recalls asking. “There was no answer.” She wasn’t alone: On Aug. 20, Councilwoman Burke sent a letter to Mayor Condon excoriating him and his administration for its lack of preparation. “This is a huge mistake to take away shelter spaces

cilman Breean Beggs said at the next council meeting. “People will die, likely.” The fact that it took until September for the city to put out the call for warming centers left Beggs wondering if the city administration was intentionally stalling because of budgetary concerns. But Kinder says the city wasn’t twiddling its thumbs. July, she says, was spent trying to finalize the city’s plan with Catholic Charities. August was spent gauging which nonprofits might be interested in helping, and what they needed. And while Kinder herself was on maternity leave from mid-August to November, she says the city had “staff working 60 and 80-hour weeks trying to get the ball rolling” since September. But that ball rolled up against one roadblock after another.

BACKLASH

On Sept. 18, the city held an information session for potential warming center operators. But instead of a bevy of interested social agencies, Kinder says, city staffers were greeted at the session by activists like Tom Robinson, who chided the department for delaying so long. “Who do you expect to not only provide the facility,

but to provide the trained staff in such a short time?” Robinson recalls asking them. Kinder says that the heated meeting actually sabotaged the delicate process of reaching out to nonprofits to create new shelters. “Our nonprofits want to help, but they also don’t want to be caught up in politics,” Kinder says. With social service agencies wary, Kinder says the city changed its strategy, reaching out to agencies one-on-one. But by October, only three agencies had responded — including the Guardians Foundation, a nonprofit that helps homeless veterans — and none of them were offering facilities to be used as a shelter. “The optics from the House of Charity make a landlord think twice about, ‘Why would I want to be a part of this?’” speculates Guardians Foundation founder Mike Shaw. Even when the city thought it had enough shelters lined up in November, the city’s fire marshals inadvertently undermined its efforts by going out to inspect several sites independently. “It scared some of our partners,” Kinder says. Kinder says that many of the efforts, either by the council or other departments, often ended up backfiring while sending mixed messages. She says that the city’s Human Services Department will likely play its cards even closer in the future, despite council frustrations. “We sometimes end up with too many cooks in the kitchen and miscommunications happen,” says Kinder, who will be leaving the city at the end of the month to take a job with Catholic Charities.

THE LLAMEDO EFFECT

Into this environment came activist Alfredo LLamedo. The City Council knows LLamedo well: This summer, Council President Ben Stuckart gaveled a meeting to a close early after LLamedo repeatedly accused the council members of being full of “bullshit, bullshit, bullshit,” while not caring about the homeless. Beginning on Nov. 12, with the lack of shelter space in mind, LLamedo staged a hunger strike outside City Hall, refusing to leave until the city suspended the sit-lie ordinance that mostly banned people from sitting or lying on downtown sidewalks. A week later, the council agreed to temporarily suspend the law until shelter space opened, but by then LLamedo had been joined by homeless campers. A one-man hunger strike had begun to evolve into Camp Hope, complete with big donated blue tents. Kinder says that some nonprofits they’d been working with simply stopped responding once the tent city cropped up. “We’ve cold-called, showed up on people’s doorsteps, trying to reactivate,” Kinder says. “There’s been very real negative impacts.” At the City Hall protest on Saturday, I start to ask LLamedo about Kinder’s claim that the activism had impeded efforts to open new shelters, but I’m interrupted by Councilwoman Burke. “Lies!” Burke says. “I don’t understand what a protest would do for warming shelters.” Burke and LLamedo continue to argue that the city failed to seize upon available opportunities, like tapping into local community centers, in a timely manner. Either way, in the last few weeks, the city managed to cobble together a coalition of new partners — like Salem Lutheran and the Guardian Foundation — and old ones. The Salvation Army even agreed to help out with staffing. By Dec. 7, the city had opened 100 new warming shelter spaces, with the possibility of 140 on the way. Camp Hope finally came to an end Sunday morning, when the Spokane Police officially evicted the remaining campers, and LLamedo and another activist were arrested. But the activists aren’t going away. Minutes into Monday night’s council meeting, LLamedo interrupts to object to the Downtown Spokane Partnership’s domination of early council speaking slots. Audience members begins chanting “homeless rights are human rights.” “BULLSHIT!” LLamedo yells before being escorted out. “You people suck.” n danielw@inlander.com

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NEWS | CRIMINAL JUSTICE

What Now? After a string of inmate deaths inside the Spokane County Jail, an outside expert calls for reforms BY JOSH KELETY

on Hooper, a lieutenant at the Spokane County Jail, shows off an empty cell for suicidal inmates in an area on the second floor known as “2West.” Inside, the scuffed unit is stripped bare, featuring only a narrow opaque window, a metal toilet and sink, a thick “suicide-resistant” blanket and a thin mattress on the concrete floor. “There’s very little there to harm themselves [with],” Hooper tells the Inlander. “We haven’t had anybody in a watch cell pass away from suicide.” Minutes later, while standing outside the row of 12 cells that are used for “suicide watch” — a practice where inmates deemed at risk are placed in temporary solitary confinement to prevent self-harm — Hooper wanders over to another cell where an inmate has been repeatedly and loudly banging on his cell door, purportedly to find out when he is appearing in court next. After conversing with the detainee, Hooper says that he is “just upset” and that the jail staff on the floor have likely been hearing the banging “all morning” despite informing the inmate of his court proceedings. Meanwhile, county mental health workers check-in on inmates by talking to them through their cell doors as one inmate whistles loudly from a nearby cell before launching into a incomprehensible rant. It’s this scene that Lindsay Hayes, a nationally recognized expert on suicide prevention in jails and correctional facilities, says is problematic and needs to be changed in a new report. After a string of inmate deaths in the facility — eight in total have died over the past 14 months, including three who hanged themselves with bedsheets — county officials hired Hayes to evaluate their suicide prevention protocols and practices. The report, which was submitted to John McGrath, director of Spokane County Detention Services, on Oct. 9, featured 27 recommendations, ranging from acquiring suicide-proof mattresses for inmates placed on suicide watch, to increasing suicide prevention training for jail staff and minimizing cell-side interactions between inmates and mental health workers. Looking at inmate suicides in county detention facilities from January 2014 through September 2018, Hayes concludes in the report that Spokane’s suicide rate is above average. “The suicide rate was 84.5 deaths per 1,000 inmates — a rate that is higher than that of county jails of varying size throughout the United States,” he writes.

hile Hayes doesn’t connect Spokane’s frequent inmate suicides to any specific practices identified in his report, some of his findings stand out. For example, inmates placed on suicide watch in the Spokane County Jail are, in practice, held in solitary confinement 24 hours a day with limited access to showers, telephones and on-site visits. Hayes writes that he was informed by jail staff that “inmates placed on suicide precautions rarely are permitted out of their cell” and that “confining a suicidal inmate up to 24 hours a day only enhances isolation and is anti-therapeutic.”

20 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Inmates placed on “suicide watch” can stay in solitary confinement for several days. Additionally, Hayes notes that seemingly punitive conditions of the county’s suicide precautions can lead to inmates downplaying any suicidal thoughts. “Research suggests that suicidal inmates are often reluctant to discuss their suicidal thoughts because of the likelihood of being exposed to the harsh conditions of suicide precautions,” he writes. (In his report, Hayes calls for the county to limit confinement in holding cells to six hours and for it to be a last resort.) According to Lt. Hooper, inmates placed on suicide watch typically spend between one to three days in holding cells. As to suicidal inmates limited access to showers and other services, Hooper says it’s to keep them (and staff) safe. “If they’re trying to harm themselves, we’re not going to get them in a shower,” he says. LETTERS “After that time on Send comments to [suicide] watch, they’re editor@inlander.com. going to have access to showers.” “Suicide watch is very grueling for everybody,” says Jeffry Finer, a Spokane defense attorney who has represented clients who have been placed on suicide precautions. “It may be the way that jails make people safe, but it feels like punishment. “When I have had clients who were at risk and [I told them] ‘you’re thinking of harming yourself, let someone know,’ they responded ‘are you nuts? I’ve had clients tell me that they just stay under the covers with their eyes shut rather than report that they’re considering self-harm hoping it will pass.”

tanding on the floor of 2-West in the county jail where two officers are expected to supervise up to 12 inmates on suicide watch, Lt. Hooper estimates that fully implementing the recommendation regarding the placement of suicidal individuals in holding cells — given the jail’s current overcrowding and staff limitations — will require additional staffing and resources to monitor at-risk inmates. “It would definitely take more

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

staff,” Hooper says. “The problem is we have 670 people in custody and 60 to 70 percent have significant mental health issues.” “I think we had 800 suicide attempts last year,” he adds. Other parts of Hayes’ report take aim at jail staff practices with inmates before they are placed on suicide precautions. Currently, when inmates are booked into the jail, they are screened by nurses with NaphCare — the private company that Spokane County contracts with to provide medical services in its detention facilities — for mental health issues at an exposed desk in the broader intake room where numerous officers and inmates often linger. Hayes argues that this process severely limits the staff’s ability to accurately assess inmates’ risk of suicide since they are less likely to disclose sensitive personal information without privacy. “This situation is very problematic,” he writes, going on to call for interview booths or rooms to be established in the booking area. John McGrath, the director of Detention Services, tells the Inlander that the county plans to implement all of the recommendations by March 2019 and is currently rewriting its suicide prevention policies to accommodate Hayes’ report. Some of them have already been enacted, such as providing follow-up mental assessments to inmates recently discharged from suicide watch. Others, like outfitting the booking room to give inmates more privacy during their mental health screening and acquiring suicide-resistant bunks, are awaiting final cost estimates and will likely require additional funding from the Spokane County Board of Commissioners. “The beds are the most expensive part of this whole project,” McGrath says. “They run between $50,000 to $60,000.” When asked whether he was surprised by any of the recommendations, McGrath says: “I think every time you work in an area so long, you think you’re doing everything right. And then an independent evaluator comes in and says, ‘Here’s some things you should be doing.’” n

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 21

22 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Taming a

Tiger

Homegrown rock star Myles Kennedy reflects on his unlikely career, Spokane venues of his youth and a deeply personal solo album a lifetime in the making BY DAN NAILEN

yles Kennedy opens the door to the Big Dipper on a crisp, clear afternoon, walks in and quickly looks around to reacquaint himself with one of the important music venues of his youth. The changes since he last performed there more than two decades ago are subtle. The changes in the life of the friendly 49-year-old poking around the stage and scanning the Dipper’s walls are considerably more dramatic. Twenty years ago, Kennedy and his friends in the Spokane band the Mayfield Four were doing their damnedest to live out their rock ’n’ roll dreams. They’d landed a big-time record deal, released a well-received debut and toured the country opening for then-huge acts like Creed and Stabbing Westward. Everything was set up to turn Kennedy and his buddies into rock stars. That didn’t happen. After the Mayfield Four didn’t catch fire, the band broke up in 2002 and Kennedy found himself in Spokane, unsure of what to do next. “I thought I’d hung up my rock ’n’ roll cleats, so to speak,” Kennedy says. “I was really disillusioned. We were just another casualty of the music industry. So I went back to teaching guitar. I got married.” That could have been the end of the story, and it would still be a happy ending. A guy got to tour the country with his buddies, made a couple records, then married the girl of his dreams and settled down to a quiet life teaching in his hometown — ain’t nothing wrong with that. That didn’t happen either. First came a phone call in 2003 from one of the Creed guys, looking to start a new band. Then another call a few

years later from Guns N’ Roses guitarist Slash, looking for a collaborator in another new group. In the past 15 years, those two projects — Alter Bridge and Slash featuring Myles Kennedy and the Conspirators — have sold hundreds of thousands of albums and played to millions of fans in arenas, theaters and stadiums stretching from London to Sydney, to Rio to Tokyo and New York City. Turns out Kennedy’s rock ’n’ roll dream wasn’t dead. It was just a little slow in developing.

yles Kennedy is the biggest music star to come out of Spokane since Bing Crosby. Unlike the old crooner, though, Kennedy never moved away from the Lilac City to search for fame and fortune. Those things found him here, where he’s lived since he was 4. That was when his newly widowed mother moved his family to the Pacific Northwest after his biological father’s death. That tragedy took an emotional toll on Kennedy and his family, something he addresses with unflinching openness on his first solo album, released in spring 2018. Year of the Tiger 1974, the year when his father died, was some 15 years in the making; he originally started writing songs for a solo album right after Mayfield Four’s demise. Year of the Tiger 1974 offers a catharsis for Kennedy as a person, and an outlet for him as a musician to explore blues, country and folk sounds never heard in his other projects. For the listener, it’s an ideal introduction to a talented multi-instrumentalist with a four-octave range who learned his skills in local public schools (he’s a Mead High grad), at Spokane Falls Community College and on Spokane club stages. ...continued on next page

FACING PAGE: Myles Kennedy performing at London’s famed Royal Albert Hall. NIALL FENNESSY PHOTO

ALTER BRIDGE

Myles Kennedy first met his future Alter Bridge bandmates when Mayfield Four opened for Creed for a few weeks in 1998. Five years later, the non-singing Creed guys got in touch about starting a new project, and Kennedy was intrigued after recalling their “real specific feel, a certain groove I thought was interesting and cool.” “I thought it would be interesting to see what I could do vocally with that,” Kennedy says. “As a writer and as a creative person, I’m always kind of curious. ‘What would happen if you mix this with this?’” Five albums and 15 years later, having sold hundreds of thousands of albums and played to millions of fans on virtually every continent on the planet (sorry, Antarctica), clearly what happened was something people wanted to hear. “Honestly, I thought it would be one record and they’d put Creed back together,” Kennedy says. “I’ve always been half-glass-empty. I try to stay optimistic, I just know this business is really hard and I never take anything for granted. I never assume anything is going to last forever.” (DN)

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 23

MUSIC

SLASH FEATURING MYLES KENNEDY AND THE CONSPIRATORS

Guns N’ Roses guitarist Slash (above center) first contacted Myles Kennedy about working together before Alter Bridge came together, as the lanky, top-hatted axeman was working on constructing what would become Velvet Revolver. Kennedy was still feeling down on the music biz after Mayfield Four had broken up, and he “respectfully declined” the chance to audition for the spot eventually given to Stone Temple Pilots’ Scott Weiland. “People thought I was crazy,” Kennedy recalls. “People around me thought I was an idiot. But one thing I’ve learned is to trust my gut. And my gut was telling me it wasn’t the right time for some reason.” Fast-forward nearly a decade and Slash again hit up Kennedy, this time to sing on a couple tunes on Slash’s 2010 solo debut. That turned into Kennedy touring as the featured vocalist in Slash’s solo band, which then turned into it becoming a semi-permanent gig titled Slash featuring Myles Kennedy and the Conspirators. Under that name, they’ve released three more albums with Kennedy as the sole voice, including this fall’s Living The Dream. “It’s very different [than Alter Bridge], very different musically,” he says. “It’s obviously more blues-based rock ’n’ roll music.” (DN)

ROCK STAR (the movie)

Some of you might remember this 2001 Mark Wahlberg flick about a cover-band singer who suddenly gets to join his favorite band for real. Perhaps you recall Jennifer Aniston trying to play Wahlberg’s rocker girlfriend, or the real-life rock stars like Zakk Wylde and Jason Bonham who surrounded Wahlberg in the movie’s fictional band, Steel Dragon. If you do, then you probably also remember the movie’s ending when Wahlberg is fronting the band in a sold-out arena, hears a superfan singing in the front row, then literally pulls that fan from the audience and gives up his spot in the band right then and there. That superfan? None other than Myles Kennedy! For Kennedy, more memorable than his brief entry into acting was the chance to meet Bonham, the son of Led Zeppelin’s legendary drummer John Bonham. “I remember one day going up to him between takes and just telling him, ‘Hey man, I want to let you know your father’s legacy and what it meant to me,’” Kennedy says. “And he was just so appreciative. What I learned from that conversation was how proud he is of his father. And it was really cool as we were both guys who lost our fathers at a young age. I felt like that was this thing we had in common, and hearing him speak so highly of his father was a beautiful thing.” (DN)

24 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

“TAMING A TIGER,” CONTINUED... This weekend, Kennedy’s musical life comes full circle as he headlines Spokane’s most iconic venue, the Fox Theater, on the tour supporting the Year of the Tiger 1974. He met with the Inlander to talk about his formative years and some of the important spots along his path to stardom.

SPOKANE CONVENTION CENTER

This is the unlikely location where a teenage Kennedy first sang in public. Sure, he’d sung before — his stepdad is a minister, and he did hymns with the rest of the congregation — but Kennedy was all about playing guitar like his hero Jimmy Page from Led Zeppelin. He wasn’t keen to be the center of attention. “It was actually a really big hurdle I had to get over,” Kennedy says. “I loved playing guitar, it was oxygen for me, but the idea of standing on stage sometimes was a bit of a challenge.” Despite that, Kennedy and his friends put together a band called Saleax — a made-up word for “fast guitars,” Kennedy says. “It was silly. It was the ’80s!” The band was rehearsing for a “rock against drugs” benefit at the convention center when they started playing Zeppelin’s “Rock and Roll” and

“I don’t want to say music saved me, but it gave me a purpose and helped me figure out who I was. And in that sense, it did save me.” Kennedy jumped in singing. Kennedy’s friends liked it and immediately decided he’d sing lead on the song at the show — and it would be the first song they played. “This is 1986, and I was a scrawny little kid,” Kennedy says, “and I show up to this big venue and there are all these bands, and they’re all cool. I’m not cool.” The applause at the end surprised Kennedy, “and then I slipped back into the role I wanted to do, which was play guitar,” for several years before he sang on stage again. That focus on guitar paid off, though, as Kennedy par-

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dan Nailen is the Arts & Culture Editor at the Inlander. Before arriving in Spokane in 2014, he worked in Utah, Montana, Idaho and Oregon at daily and weekly newspapers, glossy magazines and radio stations. He’s been writing about music professionally for more than 20 years, and obsessing over rock ‘n’ roll for even longer. He can be reached via email at dann@inlander.com or (509) 325-0634 ext. 239.

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! s t f i G y a d i l o H layed his lessons in high school into a role as lead guitarist in a hard-rock band called Bittersweet, playing countless nights at old Spokane haunts like Gatsby’s and throwing parties for friends. Eventually, Kennedy joined the commercial music/jazz studies program at Spokane Falls Community College to further his sixstring skills and expand his musical palette. “I always tried to have a really open mind because I didn’t want to be absorbing too much of just one genre. That was something I learned out at Spokane Falls,” Kennedy says. “I just had this appetite I couldn’t satiate in a lot of ways, musically. I was always listening to different things and trying to get off. I was so addicted to music, and still am.” Joe Brasch was one of Kennedy’s instructors at SFCC, and they’ve been friends ever since. Brasch says Kennedy was already a pretty well-known guitarist in town when he arrived in college, and when Kennedy stepped up to sing at one of the school’s concerts, he “blew the doors off the place. That voice — everything was there. I was shell-shocked.” “He was already an incredibly talented young man when I met him,” says Brasch, now CEO of Kennedy’s charity Future Song Foundation. “And his work ethic! I don’t know if I’d ever met anybody that worked harder than he did. He always came ...continued on next page

[drink responsibly]

Growing up, Myles Kennedy says, playing guitar “was oxygen for me.” YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 25

MUSIC

NOT NOT LED ZEPPELIN

Meeting Jason Bonham on the Rock Star set would prove the spark of what Myles Kennedy calls “probably the most incredible experience of my life,” musically speaking. Kennedy was on tour in Europe in 2008 when he got a text from Bonham asking him to call back. He figured the drummer had friends wanting show tickets. Instead, Bonham told him, “I’m in London with some friends. ... I wonder if you’re interested in coming over next week for a jam or two?” Those friends turned out to be Jimmy Page (right) and John Paul Jones (left), the guys who started Led Zeppelin with singer Robert Plant (center) and Bonham’s dad. Kennedy still remembers exactly the day he showed up and started playing music with his childhood heroes — Friday, June 13, 2008 — and sputtered like a total fanboy, “You guys drew the blueprint for everything, thank you!” Kennedy played with Bonham, Page and Jones for a few days that June, and again for four days in September 2008, but nothing ever came of it in terms of recording or a tour. Still, Kennedy buzzes as he relays the experience for probably the thousandth time. “It was surreal,” Kennedy says. “To be honest with you, it still seems so hard to fathom. Every single time I talk about it, I’m like, ‘Is this The Matrix? Am I living in a virtual reality? Is this actually real? Are you real? No way!’” (DN)

A PHIL LESH FRIEND

Lest you think Myles Kennedy is only about the hard-rock, forget it. Over the course of conversation he mentions an array of artists he admires, spanning genres that include bluegrass, folk, country and more. He says he could “talk about Sturgill Simpson for the next hour,” considers singer-songwriters Jeff Buckley and Chris Whitley big influences and recommends a Chris Thile/Brad Mehldau album on which they cover Gillian Welch. Clearly, the guy knows about all kinds of music. Asked about any collaborations he’s worked on that might be surprising, Kennedy comes through: The Grateful Dead’s Phil Lesh, who he worked with about 10 years ago. Yes, that’s about the same time as hanging with the Led Zep guys — Kennedy gets around! “[Lesh] was working on something for a TV show, so we sat down to write and actually recorded a few things,” Kennedy says. “That was a lot of fun. Phil’s super-smart, intelligent. I love hanging out with people like that, when you feel you can really learn something from them.” (DN)

26 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Myles Kennedy outside the Big Dipper, a place that inspired him to pursue original music years before he got to play there.

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

“TAMING A TIGER,” CONTINUED... prepared for his lessons. He always came in with questions, always came in ready to play. He was one of the most passionate guys I ever met in terms of playing his instrument and his music.” That passion would soon push Kennedy into writing his own songs.

ANKENY’S

Kennedy’s versatility as a guitarist made him a natural fit for Ankeny’s, a 13th-floor restaurant/lounge in the Ridpath Hotel that featured a steady diet of cover bands, funk and jazz. It was there that Citizen Swing congealed as a house band of sorts, with Kennedy singing and playing guitar. They were put together by Caroline Lawson, and she wrote the lyrics for the band’s first album, a collection that featured Kennedy’s first efforts at songwriting. That project helped push Kennedy into pursuing his own music, as opposed to simply being a hired gun. “Once I got the songwriting bug, that’s when I knew I’d have to change, when I knew I’d have to sing myself to kind of facilitate my vision,” Kennedy says. In Seattle at the time, the so-called “grunge” movement was turning bands like Soundgarden, Alice in Chains and Nirvana into some of the biggest bands on the planet. Those bands were writing their own songs, being true to themselves, and they were doing it in their hometown. “One of the things I learned from watching their scene was, they built their own scene,” Kennedy says. “They weren’t all taking off to L.A. They did it there, and that was really important to me.” A lot of Kennedy’s Spokane friends moved to Seattle during those years, but Kennedy knew he didn’t want to just be another voice and guitar in a city suddenly glutted with bands trying to make it big. “I knew if I went there, it was going to affect what I was going to end up creating. And I wanted whatever I was going to develop to be unique. It took a long time to figure that out, and a lot of growth, and a lot of mistakes.”

THE BIG DIPPER

Another push to write his own music came while Kennedy

was still playing at Ankeny’s, looking out the windows down at the Big Dipper, which was establishing itself as an important outlet for local original music. “It would be Friday night, I’d be playing the hits up at Ankeny’s and I’d look down and see all these kids standing outside and wonder ‘Who’s the band tonight?’” Kennedy says. “I’d kind of be envious of the situation because I knew they were expressing themselves in a different way. And that was very enticing.” The Big Dipper had entered Kennedy’s mind as a potential outlet years before, when he was in Bittersweet, doing hard-rock originals and covers by the likes of Bon Jovi. Kennedy was lead guitarist, having joined as a high school junior. Early on, they had to rent grange halls, throwing parties full of high school kids that eventually got them banned because “the grange halls didn’t quite look the same when we got done with them.” Eventually, they got a gig at Gatsby’s. “We played four sets a night, and we’d throw in a few originals, but for the most part we were doing the hard rock of the day,” Kennedy says. “Then we’d have to get up and go to school in the morning. We’d be playing until 1:30 in the morning, and then have to get up at 7 and go to school and do it all over again. It was a blast.”

123 ARTS

When Bittersweet at one point found itself desperate for a new rehearsal space, they found 123 Arts, a building with a bunch of rehearsal rooms and a performance stage.

“I just know this business is really hard and I never take anything for granted. I never assume anything is going to last forever.”

PLAYING FOR THE FUTURE

usic was a vital part of Myles Kennedy’s life well before he did it professionally. When he was growing up in Spokane, his mom sat him down and told him she’d rent any instrument he wanted to learn — music was that important to her. He started out as a trumpet player, and eventually found himself the drum major of Mead High School’s marching band during his senior year of 1987-88. Years later, after becoming a music-biz success story, Kennedy and his wife Selena were in a coffee shop in Vienna, Austria — “other than Spokane, our favorite place” — and reflecting on “where we were in life, what we wanted in life, and we thought it was time to do something for the community.” From that initial conversation eventually came the Future Song Foundation, a nonprofit the Kennedys launched with Myles’ old Spokane friend and guitar instructor Joe Brasch in 2015 to help kids access music through instruments and instruction. Kennedy says it was important to start an organization that resonated with both him and his wife. Selena works in the mental health industry with kids, and Myles says music was massively important to him as a kid. “I don’t want to say music ‘saved’ me because that sounds kind of dramatic, but it gave me a purpose and helped

me figure out who I was, and in that sense it did save me,” Kennedy says. “And music has been oxygen ever since.” Future Song donated 80 guitars and 20 keyboards this fall to Shadle Park, Lewis and Clark, North Central and Rogers high schools, the Spokesman-Review reported, after previously launching a ukulele program at the Boys & Girls Clubs of Spokane County, starting a drum program at Morning Star Boys Ranch and donating instruments to Excelsior Youth Center. Brasch, Future Song’s CEO, told the Inlander he recognizes the tough financial choices that school districts have, but notes that there is ample evidence that giving students access to music “unlocks the human mind” in ways that helps them succeed. Where schools have cut music programs is where Future Song is needed most, and Kennedy is making it happen. “He truly is that passionate about music,” Brasch says of his former pupil. “The thing that continues to blow my mind about Myles is that he’s still the same. That passion he had for music at 17 is still the passion he has now. And wanting to give other people the opportunity to experience that is something that’s really important to him.” — DAN NAILEN

Kennedy performing with Citizen Swing at the Met, now the Bing Crosby Theater.

For Kennedy, 123 Arts was eye-opening, a place where he realized there were a lot of different sounds than those he was making with the hard-rocking Bittersweet. In one room, they met some guys from Coeur d’Alene called Sacrament, who eventually added some horns and became Black Happy. Some young California punks called Green Day came through and played a show there. “It was a lot of the cooler bands,” Kennedy says. “I’ll admit, a lot of the music we were making was very hard-rock based. We didn’t necessarily fit in with sort of the cool alternative-punk thing that was happening at the time. “It was a great place for Spokane, to be exposed to this movement that was coming up … I certainly appreciated and admired it.”

hrough all years since playing those old clubs, through Mayfield Four’s brief run at the big time and his decades of success since, Kennedy has stayed in Spokane, living with his wife, Selena, who he met at the old Blue Spark (now the Observatory, and what Kennedy calls “the most important club in this town”) and generally laying low when he’s not on tour. His mom and stepdad live in Deer Park, he has a couple dogs, and he likes to do a lot of the same things he always did growing up. “When I got off the road with Slash a few weeks ago, I couldn’t wait to … do the yearly ritual of going to Green Bluff to get our pumpkins, get some apples,” Kennedy says. “Those rituals I’ve done since I was a kid still have such allure to me.” Old friend Joe Brasch says the young guitar player he met 30 years ago hasn’t changed much. “This is a kid who had the talent and the drive and the work ethic from the very beginning,” Brasch says. “None of that has changed, which is what keeps him doing what he’s doing and at the top of his game Myles Kennedy with Walking every time you see him.” Papers • Fri, Dec. 14 at 8 That drive is what led pm • $38-$60 • All ages • him to realize a couple Martin Woldson Theater at years ago that the songs the Fox • 1001 W. Sprague he’d been working on • foxtheaterspokane.org • and recording off and on 624-1200 for more than a decade simply weren’t working for him anymore. He literally scrapped an entire album and started from scratch in 2017, deciding to explore his love of sounds far from the guitar-based hard-rock he’s best known for, and finally address, through his lyrics, the pain and aftermath of his biological father’s death. “I felt like it was time to do that, although I had attempted to do that some in the past,” Kennedy says. “It never felt right and I closed the door.” Once Kennedy committed to exploring those feelings, he jumped in fully. The result is an impressive document on Year of the Tiger 1974, an emotional journey that — even with Kennedy utilizing things like banjo, lap-steel and mandolin — still, indeed, rocks. “What’s important is to make sure that the emotions I’m extracting are from a sincere place,” Kennedy says. “Sometimes you don’t even think about it, it’s as if it just manifests itself in the songs and you don’t even understand where it’s coming from. You just know you need to purge this and you let it flow. “I’ve made massive mistakes along the way where I’ve written things and it hasn’t come from the heart like I wanted it to, and you listen to it later and you kind of cringe. You have such a finite amount of time on this planet — be honest with what you’re singing about.” n

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 27

PREVIOUSLY...

Miller Cane, who’s been taking care of an 8-year-old doll-making girl named Carleen, leaves her at the house of friends Mickey and Grace, and he goes to visit Carleen’s mother, Lizzie, who’s in jail. Lizzie is facing criminal charges after shooting her estranged husband, Connor, who suddenly came back into the picture after learning that Carleen will inherit a massive family fortune that Connor believes is rightfully his. Miller plans to take Carleen on the road to keep her away from Connor, but when he goes to retrieve the girl’s beloved cat Waffles, Miller finds himself trapped upstairs in Lizzie’s empty house when Connor shows up.

CHAPTER 3, PART 5

iller drove away from the jail, knowing what he’d known since the beginning, that Connor was dangerous and coming for Carleen. He drove to Lizzie’s to get the cat and Barbie castle and Carleen’s special blanket, but then Connor arrived in his black Mustang, idling at the curb and finally limping toward the front door. If this were a massacre, Connor would be a victim, a survivor, having been shot by Lizzie, and Miller would be working to bring him back to life with therapy animals and spiritual inventories and community meals and coffee. But this wasn’t a massacre and Connor wasn’t a survivor. He was the shooter for a massacre waiting to happen. On the porch, Connor looked up the street and down the street, pulling something from his back pocket. He

ABOUT THIS PROJECT

Miller Cane: A True and Exact History, a new novel by Samuel Ligon, is being published for the first time in the pages of the Inlander. The latest installments of the book will always appear in print first, then on the web the following Wednesday MADE POSSIBLE BY and then on Spokane Public Radio, which is broadcasting audio versions of each installment. Visit MillerCane.Inlander.com for more details.

28 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

looked up the street and down. Then he punched the blade of a screwdriver through the front door’s narrow window. Waffles bolted from Carleen’s bed. Miller crept toward Lizzie’s room looking for something heavy. A floorboard creaked underfoot and Connor called up the stairs for Carleen. He’d always seemed like a tool to Miller, from the stories he’d heard, but never dangerous. Not this kind of dangerous. Obviously, something had changed. Money did that to people, made them horrible, dangerous, small. But all kinds of things did that to people. At least some of what Lizzie had told him in jail this morning felt off or inflated. But she was screwed up from being there, the noise and never sleeping, separated from Carleen. And Connor was screwed up too. Maybe he was capable of anything. “Is that you Carleen?” Connor called near the top of the stairs. Miller stood behind Lizzie’s door, gripping a plaster virgin Mary statue, maybe two feet long, maybe ten pounds. He was pretty sure it had been Lizzie’s grandma’s, and that it had become less ironic over the years perched on her dresser, though he didn’t know why he thought that. Maybe because she never talked about it anymore, or maybe because she’d moved the psychedelic concrete virgin from the back garden into the garage, not that she went to church or anything. Or maybe she did. A string of rosary beads hung on her doorknob. Miller could hear Connor in the hall, inching his way toward Lizzie’s room, could practically hear him breathing. Miller stood behind Lizzie’s door, which Connor finally walked through, the back of his head a perfect target. He still held the screwdriver in his hand, some blood on his knuckles where he must have cut himself on the glass. It was surprising how fast and hard he dropped. For a minute, Miller wondered if he was dead. But then

he started to groan. Miller could hear himself breathing. He rushed to Carleen’s room and gathered her stuff and Waffles, who was back on the bed, yawning. Yawning when a man had just been crowned across the hall. Connor moaned. Miller took the stairs down two at a time, then he was out the front door, across the street, and into the motorhome — no time to grab Waffles’ dishes in the kitchen. Connor was possibly dying up there. Or possibly in pursuit. Either way, it was time to go. Miller put the moho in gear and was pulling from the curb when Connor staggered out the front door. “I see you, man,” he called. “I see you!” And he bent from the waist on Lizzie’s front porch, holding his head in his hands. Miller had broken the statue over his head. He’d buy Lizzie another one. In the sideview mirror, Connor was still doubled over, holding his head. This was good news. Connor was alive! And bad news. Connor was alive. By the time he got to Mickey and Grace’s place, Miller was certain he hadn’t been followed. But Waffles was making horrible noises from somewhere behind the driver’s seat. Why had Miller agreed to this? He could still smell the cat piss, reactivated on his tee shirt by sweat. Miller had known Waffles peed in people’s shoes, but on people themselves? He parked the moho as Grace and Carleen pulled into the driveway, returned from their swim at Bay View. “Did you get Waffles?” Carleen called, and Miller said, “He’s in back somewhere. Would you make sure he’s not peeing on my bed?” “He wouldn’t do that,” Carleen said. “Did you get the Barbie castle?” “Oh,” Miller said. “That’s the one thing — ” “We can go back,” Carleen said, and Miller said, “No, we have to hit the road.” Grace was sniffing around him. Carleen emerged from the moho holding Waffles. “You’re not going to stay for dinner?” Grace said. “We’ll get another castle,” Miller said to Carleen. “A

better one.” “What’s the hurry?” Grace said. “How was Mom?” Carleen said. “Great!” Miller said. “She sends love. We’ll call her from the road. I’m really hoping to camp tonight.” Carleen looked at Miller’s shirt. “He pees on you when you don’t hold him right. Did you get his stuff?” “He wants new stuff,” Miller said. Carleen had her special blanket wrapped around her neck, a disintegrating pale yellow rag that had once been her baby blanket. No one was pulling into the driveway. No car was rumbling out on the road. No way did Connor know about this place, these people. Probably. But it was time to get into the mountains and then over them. “Can Waffles come inside?” Carleen said, and Miller said, “We have to go,” and Grace said, “Of course he can. Come on, Miller. You can change your shirt and pack a lunch.” Waffles bolted under the back deck. “It’s okay,” Grace said. “Relax.” Miller didn’t want to relax. He’d almost been killed today. He’d almost killed somebody today, who was right now looking for them. While Carleen coaxed Waffles out, Miller told Grace what had happened. She packed them a lunch, wrapped the unopened pie in a dishtowel. “He doesn’t know you, does he?” Miller asked her. “I don’t think so.” Grace hugged Carleen and helped load the moho, and then they were on the road again, headed east on the North Cascades Highway, Carleen stitching a doll named Tammy for Miller’s mother. “Your mom’s doing really well,” Miller said, “though she misses you. I think she’s going to be out of there within a month or so, maybe sooner. It’s just a misunderstanding.” “How soon?” Carleen said. “I’m not sure. We’ll ask her on the phone tonight.” He needed to stop lying, making everything worse, especially since Carleen seemed fine. “How about some music?” he said. “How about ‘Puff the Magic Dragon?’” Carleen said. “I don’t have that one,” Miller said, and Carleen said, “I bet we could find it on your phone,” which she did and which they listened to a few times before they lost connectivity. Carleen worked on her doll. Miller worked on getting them away. “The most famous Tammy was a pilgrim witch,” he said, the jagged top of Mount Baker sneaking around a curve as they approached Concrete. “I can make her a pilgrim,” Carleen said. “Does your mom like pilgrims?” “Everybody likes pilgrims,” Miller said. “And witches,” Carleen said, “except when they’re scary.” Somehow the phone grabbed “Puff the Magic Dragon” again, pouring it through the motorhome’s sound system, the north Cascades rising all around them. n

MILLER CANE CONTINUES IN NEXT WEEK’S INLANDER

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 29

Multimedia

Gift Guide

… And things every audiophile must have! By Dan Nailen and Nathan Weinbender CHRIS CORNELL (A) Many box sets fail to fully capture the entirety of an artist, but sadly Chris Cornell’s 2017 suicide gives the new four-disc set simply titled Chris Cornell natural beginning and end points. Most impressively, it somehow manages to capture the full breadth of one of the Pacific Northwest’s greatest voices and frontmen on those four discs in a way that should appeal to both long-time fans and relative newcomers. There’s only one unreleased studio track included, and it’s a mighty one in “When Bad Does Good.” And the entire fourth disc is live performances that showcase Cornell’s willingness to push well beyond the “grunge” label that stuck with him from way back in his Soundgarden days, and includes covers of artists like Bob Marley, Prince, U2, Metallica and Michael Jackson — all songs he did in his final Spokane show in the summer of 2016. Leading up to that live disc is a sprawling chronological run including songs from Soundgarden, Temple of the Dog, his Jeff Buckley-inspired solo debut and later teamup with the Rage Against the Machine guys in Audioslave. The listener hears Cornell grow up across the four discs, but hopefully also hears the sound of one of the region’s most-revered rock icon’s willingness to push himself artistically right to his tragic end. (DN)

THE WHITE ALBUM VINYL REISSUE (B) The Beatles’ self-titled 1968 double LP, universally referred to as The White Album, is a cheeky, eccentric document of the

30 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

most famous band in the world breaking down and breaking up, ripping apart its own carefully cultivated public image in the process. It was as much of a game-changer as its predecessor, Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band, as deliberately shambolic and ungainly as that earlier concept album was meticulously crafted and sequenced. For its 50th anniversary, The White Album has been remastered in stereo and reissued on 180-gram vinyl in a pristine collector’s set (a CD version is also available), which includes dozens of studio outtakes and a book detailing the album’s tempestuous recording history. It remains one of the most exhilarating and unpredictable rock albums ever made, and amongst the curiosities, doodles and fragments are some of the Fab Four’s greatest late-period songs: “Dear Prudence,” “While My Guitar Gently Weeps,” “Blackbird,” “I Will,” “Sexy Sadie,” “Helter Skelter.” It feels like a new record every time you spin it. (NW)

WU-TANG CLAN SOCKS (C) Protect ya neck and protect your toes from the cold with some dope Stance socks paying tribute to Staten Island’s finest. These black and yellow bad boys feature the familiar Wu-Tang logo as well as some figures showing off their Shaolin style. You can also get some more conservative socks that hide your Wu-Tang fandom from prying eyes by keeping the logo small and tastefully simple. If you’re not a Wu-Tang fan, you should definitely consider cruising through Stance’s other music-related socks. The quality of the socks is great; I’ve yet to wear a hole through the David

Bowie or A Tribe Called Quest socks I got as a gift a couple years back. And with choices ranging from Johnny Cash to Beastie Boys, Misfits to Tupac, you’re sure to find a pair or two that properly represent your favorite tunes. (DN)

DAVID BOWIE, GLASTONBURY 2000 (D) The Glastonbury Festival in England started roughly 100 years ago and has happened consistently since the early ’70s, drawing nearly 200,000 music fans to an otherwise quiet farm for an epic slate of music. And for many, David Bowie’s set at Glastonbury in 2000 is considered the best show the festival has ever seen. Now, for the first time, the entire show is available on CD and vinyl, and some packages include a DVD of the show that’s only partly seen the light of day for some long-ago TV show. I, for one, can’t wait to get my hands on this document of Bowie giving the crowd an amazing 21-song run that spans his career. One of the reasons this Glastonbury set is so revered is that after a decade or so of largely eschewing his hits in concert, Bowie decided to pack this show with a bunch of them. Hence, you get a set ranging from his Ziggy Stardust persona through his ’80s hits like “Let’s Dance,” with stops along the way for “Heroes,” “Fame,” “‘Under Pressure,” “I’m Afraid of Americans” and so much more. Both the audio and video have been cleaned up to a vivid sheen, and for those of us who never got to see Bowie in concert, this set should be a nice consolation prize. (DN) ...continued on page 32

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 31

Multimedia Gift Guide

TRUE STORIES CRITERION BLURAY (E) Fans of David Byrne’s 1986 film True Stories can now throw away that old, out-of-print DVD copy, with its grainy picture quality and cropped aspect ratio. The Criterion Collection, always the savior of the physical media-obsessed, has brought the cult favorite to BluRay for the first time with remastered sound and image, and its release will no doubt draw a new group of devotees to this singular, cockeyed comic vision. The Talking Heads frontman directed and co-wrote the film, and he stars as our narrator and deadpan tour

guide through the fictional hamlet of Virgil, Texas, introducing us to its quirkiest denizens — a bachelor who takes out classifieds for a wife, a woman who never gets out of bed, a preaching conspiracy theorist and more. Special features on this disc include behind-thescenes documentaries, deleted scenes and a CD copy of the Talking Heads soundtrack. (NW)

DJ CAT SCRATCHING PAD (F) Your serious music geek friends aren’t satisfied to keep their

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passion for tunes in their earphones. They wear clothes and adorn their children in T-shirts that let people know what their favorite bands are. They slap stickers on their cars and bikes to announce their allegiance to certain sounds. And they certainly decorate their apartments and houses with music-related artwork, whether cheap posters or expensive framed original prints or autographed memorabilia. Why stop there when you can also use your pets to show the world you’re one hip cat? Get yourself one of these DJ Cat Scratching Pads and you’ll not only give your little kitty another

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spot in your pad to stretch their muscles and sharpen their claws — you’ll also have a cool little homage to hip-hop and DJ culture on your hands. And if your cat is particularly skilled at scratching in rhythm, you might even be inspired to write some rhymes. (DN)

2018 FILM SOUNDTRACKS (G) If you’re looking to please both cinephiles and music obsessives in one fell swoop, consider digital or physical copies of some of the best movie soundtracks of the year. Marvel’s Black Panther became one of the highestgrossing films of all time, and its soundtrack of original Kendrick Lamar songs (SZA, Vince Staples, the Weeknd and others make appearances) was just as exciting as the movie. Although it wasn’t a hit, the retro mystery Bad Times at the El Royale boasted a great soundtrack of 1960s hits, with R&B classics “Hold On, I’m Coming,” “This Old Heart of Mine” and the Four Tops’ “I’ve Got a Feeling” rubbing elbows with underrated pop gems like “Bend Me, Shape Me” by the American Breed and “Twelve Thirty (Young Girls Are Coming to the Canyon)” by the Mamas and the Papas. But it was Bradley Cooper’s remake of A Star Is Born that produced the soundtrack smash of the year, with highlights like the melancholy ballad “Maybe It’s Time,” the insistent dance pop of “Hair Body Face” and the soaring duet — and future karaoke staple — “Shallow.” (NW)

QUEEN: ALBUM BY ALBUM (H) Speaking of popular soundtracks, the financial success of this year’s Freddie Mercury biopic Bohemian Rhapsody has cemented the legacy of the dynamic performer and his band Queen, who are still getting stuck in our heads in the years since the frontman’s 1991 death. Queen is also the subject of the latest entry in the Album by Album book series, wherein longtime music critic and journalist Martin Popoff studies the band’s process and influence through each of their 15 studio albums. From Queen’s self-titled 1973 debut to 1995’s posthumous Made in Heaven, the book provides song-by-song analysis, archival photos and interviews with other writers and musicians — among them Paul McCartney, Dee Snider and Darius Rucker — about their own experiences with the band. It’s a format that should both please Queen die-hards and inform the newbies. (NW) ...continued on next page

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Multimedia Gift Guide

How to use THIS

PULL-OUT SECTION

PUTUMAYO PRESENTS SKA AROUND THE WORLD (I) Ska music catches a lot of static from rock fans, and for that you can probably thank the pop-ska likes of No Doubt and Mighty Mighty Bosstones. But if you don’t have any of those hangups and are one to embrace, you know, actual fun in your music, it’s hard to beat the horn-blasted good vibes of one of Jamaica’s finest musical styles. Putumayo Presents Ska Around the World, from the Putumayo World Music record label, delivers 10 songs from artists spanning the globe, and shows just how popular ska became once it exploded off its island home. (Really, you can’t go wrong with any of Putumayo’s releases; they’re the best at turning on Western audiences to sounds from throughout the world.) You quickly realize you don’t need to understand Spanish to love Spain’s contribution from a band called the Pepper Pots, or any of the other nonEnglish selections from Brazil or the Netherlands and beyond. My favorite is probably the Skatalites’ “Glory to the Sound,” the only selection from Jamaica, but you also don’t want to miss the Russian cover of Depeche Mode’s “Policy of Truth.” It’s weirdly wonderful. (DN)

NIGHT MOVES BY JESSICA HOPPER (J) Jessica Hopper has been entrenched in America’s music scene since she was a teenager, when a bad review of a band she loved — the Minneapolis punk trio Babes in Toyland — inspired her to start her

own zine. In the years since, she’s worked on the inside of the industry (publicizing and managing bands) and as a pioneering journalist (leading Pitchfork and MTV News at times). Three years ago she collected her stirring music writing in the excellent The First Collection of Criticism by a Living Female Rock Critic. Now she follows up with this memoir that recounts her experience of falling in (and falling in love with) a local music scene, and all the strange characters, late nights, crappy band houses and memorable parties that entails. Hopper might be focused on Chicago in Night Moves, but anyone who’s ever loved local music will find themselves in her book. (DN)

VINYL SUBSCRIPTION SERVICES (K) Seemingly every product has its own subscription service these days, and the recently resurrected vinyl industry is no different. You’ve got some options. First up is Vinyl Me, Please (vinylmeplease. com), which gets you one limited edition or collectible record every month for $25. The site’s curators select three acclaimed records at the start of each month, and you choose one — to give you an idea, a recent batch featured Muddy Waters, Mavis Staples and Lil Wayne. If you get the record and it’s not your cup of tea, you can swap it out for something else in their library. VNYL (vnyl.org) is another monthly record-shipping service, but it’s more of a crap shoot. For $39 a month, you tell the site about the artists you like — and the artists you don’t — and

then curators choose you a monthly box of three LPs based on your taste profile. Fingers crossed you like them, because there’s no swap-out with this one. Still, the gambling aspect is part of the fun. Magnolia Record Club (magnoliarecord.club), meanwhile, is more of a music lover’s Loot Crate, sending you curated boxes at $27 per month that include an LP and a collectible art print. All services offer gift cards for multiple months of service. (NW)

Pull down then out

PRINCE, PIANO AND A MICROPHONE 1983 (L) We all knew that Prince’s legendary vault of unreleased material would be plundered after his 2016 death, and Piano and a Microphone 1983 is perhaps the most interesting artifact that’s been unearthed so far. It’s a one-take recording of a solo jam session in Prince’s home studio, and we hear the Purple One, then 25, working through several in-progress lyrics and melodies. He tears into the gospel standard “Mary Don’t You Weep,” fiddles about with his idol Joni Mitchell’s “A Case of You,” and stumbles through snatches of songs that would eventually coalesce into classics like “Strange Relationship,” “17 Days” and “Purple Rain,” the latter of which would anchor the album and film that made him a megastar the following year. Piano and a Microphone runs barely over half an hour, but it’s nonetheless a fascinating snapshot of a critical point in Prince’s career, and a glimpse into the creative process of a musical genius who left us way too soon. (NW) n

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GIFT GUIDE

GIFTS FOR THOSE WHO RIDE A list that goes from head to toe

BY ALEX SAKARIASSEN

WHITEFISH HAT $56, REI

Momma always said heat escapes fastest through your noggin. Outdoor Research offers the most efficient and stylish way to keep it in. The Whitefish Hat is an ideal companion for any wintertime adventure, with earflaps that can pin back inside a toasty bar and a built-in facemask that will fend off frostnip on the trek home.

hen considering gifts for your favorite powder hound, it’s important to remember that skiing and snowboarding are more than just what’s on your feet. Shredding is great, but so is staying warm and looking good while doing it. To that end, here’s a collection of ideas that literally extend from head to toe, and from skin to wind.

DUCKWORTH WOOLCLOUD VEST

$225, ALPINE SHOP (SANDPOINT)

When it comes to staying warm, the core is key. What better solution than wrapping your torso in Montana-grown Merino wool? Duckworth has become one of the region’s leading brands in locally sourced insulation, and the Woolcloud Vest (available at the Alpine Shop in men’s and women’s) carries that trend forward, whether it’s one layer in several or an apres-ski fashion statement.

BLIZZARD BLACK PEARL 88 $600, ALPINE HAUS

Billed by Blizzard as an all-mountain workhorse, this season’s Black Pearl 88 can handle anything a hard-charging woman wants. The slim 88-millimeter waist will carve strong turns in the iciest conditions, and the reverse camber makes staying aloft on powder days a snap. If you’re going to put a pair of skis under the tree this year, it’s best to be sure they’ll last from the season’s earliest days to its last.

OAKLEY WIND JACKET 2.0

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Goggles are great, but boy howdy can they fog up on a warm day. Sunglasses are great too, but when you hit top speed, those tears can be a problem. Oakley split the difference with the Wind Jacket 2.0, a hybrid lense that promises the coverage of goggles with the easy-off comfort of glasses. Just don’t sit on them in the car.

Others might play around with fancy-shmancy heated gloves. But anyone who’s spent hours on a rope tow knows that there’s elegance in simplicity. Look around any lift line and you’ll notice the Flylow is a mainstay among hardcore riders in the Pacific Northwest. That’s because these gloves ain’t just for skiing. They’re for anything winter might throw at you.

Life in the Inland Northwest is good for a lot of things, but the biggest one is riding powder. If you’re really looking to treat that crazy snowboarder in your family this Christmas, you’ll take that as a cue. Lib Tech’s new Stump Ape is the kind of directional, ultrawide board built for big fluffy snowstorms. Plus, with this wide a platform, even folks with big feet can shred like pros.

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AIRBLASTER NINJA SUIT

WOMEN’S PHD PRO FREESKI SOCKS

Nothing makes a cold chairlift ride more miserable than a base-layer top that creeps up in the back. With the Airblaster Ninja Suit, the days of wind-nipped lower backs are over. This polyester-and-lycra onesie covers every inch of skin from scalp to ankle. And for the whimsical rider, it even comes in pizza slice print.

Odds are no one really wants people ogling their ski socks, especially after a long day on the slopes. The PhD Pro Freeski remains a work of art anyway, with shades of pink giving way to spread-winged owl in brilliant blue on the calf. A pair of these promises the same degree of warmth and comfort we’ve all come to expect from Smartwool, which itself is enough to keep any wearer floating on air.

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LIFTOPIA GIFT CARD $50 TO $250, LIFTOPIA.COM

If you truly want to give the gift of skiing this year, there is perhaps no better place to focus than the jacket zipper of your giftee. Liftopia offers gift cards in varying amounts, which can then be used on advance lift pass deals at a host of resorts across the Pacific Northwest including Mt. Spokane, Schweitzer and Lookout. Who knows, your gift could be what spurs that beloved skier or snowboarder to hit the road and shred an exciting new mountain this season. n

INSIDE

YEAR-ROUND SKIING 4 THE SNOW GHOST SPORTS CREEL’S 65TH YEAR 10 EVENTS 12 COVER ILLUSTRATION BY JESSIE HYNES

GROWING UP LAST RUN 15

DECEMBER 13, 2018 SNOWLANDER 3

GETAWAY

YOU ARE NOT ALONE Skiing year-round requires stamina, commitment and a silly outlook on life BY NICK PONTAROLO

N O OW PE N

e had already skied Mount Hood’s Palmer Snowfield after sleeping in the parking lot the night prior. Figuring a few turns on the bare sandy hillside would make for cool black-and-white

photos, we set off into the heat. The sand lapped at my legs. Each hop turn kicked the volcanic pumice into the air and down into my ski-boot cuffs, sandblasting my shins raw. Twenty-four consecutive months of skiing was

The author has skiied every month for five years.

CASEY GARRET JOHNSON PHOTO

in the books. In August, despite the fact loose dirt is more present than snow on the higher aspects, especially on volcanoes, it felt good entering my third year of skiing year-round. It felt even better to have a partner make the trip with me from Spokane. Much of the past two years were spent solo to find that stubborn patch of summer snow tucked into the eves and shadows avoiding the sun’s heat. August through October are the toughest months. The temptation to waterski or hike outranks the trek into the hills with 40 pounds of ski gear to knock out a few sun-cupped turns. Yet knowing you have linked one

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more month onto a possibly endless chain of ski memories is the driver. I was reminded of this when I read the Nov. 1 edition of Snowlander this year. Writer Alex Sakariassen wrote about a friend who’s also dedicated to the noble cause of skiing at least once each month (#skiyearround). In “The Mad Side of Skiing” article, Alex asked a question that struck me: “Why aren’t more people insane (to ski year-round)?” I thought of the sand that can still be found in my boot liners three years later and the wet hikes back to the car with purple lips and shaky hands. The procrastination until the last day because life gets in the way. The incessant buzz in my head of, “Where am I going to find snow?” and the inevitable doubt of not only finding a patch but also the motivation to reach it. But, with every mad dash for the slim summer pickings, blower boot top powder and hot laps under the chair with friends from November through May fueled the insanity. Once the maps are out and ski gear dusted off, the plan begins to take hold and I know it is all worth it. Assisting me on this maniacal journey, the ski-year-round contingent has grown through the years. I now see more familiar faces high in the hills, hiking around with ski gear on their back in knee-deep bear grass. This fall, on Month 60, I saw a guy dressed in a full purple teddy bear costume with a leopard speedo. He said it was his 12th month of consecutive skiing and he planned to continue the streak. Occasionally I ski in a jean vest and coonskin cap. Maybe Alex’s sentiment is right; we are insane, and the group is growing. I have always said, “if it starts to feel like work, then I will hang it up.” I’m happy to admit it has not reached that point. Doing something at least once per month is a really good way to begin something amazing. You may be called insane, but I would say you’re just being consistent with living a life well lived. n

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ESSAY

AN ODE TO THE SNOW GHOST To the grand chariot in the sky BY JOHN GROLLMUS

’m sitting in my favorite place on Earth, yet there’s nothing warm and cozy about it. There’s no white sand, turquoise water or lush greenery. In fact, it’s pretty much the opposite of that. It’s cold, snowing and the wind is howling. I’m alone in the midst of a winter storm dangling at a dizzying height above the barely visible ground. Between the falling snow, howling wind and what seems to be ever-present fog, I’m lost in thought about how even though I loathed the name change at the time it happened, “Snow Ghost” is probably just about perfect for the beloved Schweitzer Mountain chair lift. This hasn’t always been my favorite place; in fact, it began as quite the opposite. Looking back 45 or so years, my earliest memories of riding the old Chair 6 are of sheer terror. As a 6-year-old boy, riding any chairlift inspires the kind of fear akin to a monster under your bed, but in its original location this particular chair was even worse as it seemed to rise almost immediately to a dizzying height. As if that wasn’t enough, it also passed right over a marshy bog, which in my mind seemed to always be covered in a steaming mist where undoubtedly hid monsters of an almost unimaginable evil. While I could never say for sure how many times I dangled from my father’s death grip on my parka over that misty bog after a botched attempt to load the chair smoothly it surely seems like it was every time. Of course, before long I’d mastered the skill of properly loading the chair, but I never quite escaped that feeling of dread when gliding high above my perceived pit of despair. As my ability to ski grew so did my love of the sport, but it wasn’t until Chair 6 was literally airlifted to its current location further up the mountain in 1988 that I truly fell in love with spending my ski days riding it. With the improved unload now at the highest point on the ridge between the rocky and somewhat open North Bowl and the gloriously steep tree skiing found in the Big Timber/ Siberia zone, access to fantastic skiing was unlocked instantly. This simple, yet genius, move now made it possible for the savvy Schweitzer veteran to ski untracked powder for days. Of course, it never bothered me too much either that in its new resting place the loading zone for the chair

6 SNOWLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

This season is your last chance to ride Schweitzer’s Snow Ghost. KIM LOOSEMORE PHOTO

was nowhere near where my original fears lived. Some have claimed that the extended ride time of the chair now known as Snow Ghost has been its biggest weakness, but I’ve always found it to be one of its biggest strengths. Sure, in this instant gratification society we find ourselves today, it’s not surprising for many to be turned off by a 15-or-so-minute time out, but that’s missing the point. If we skiers only ever ride high-speed detachable chairs, can our legs really hold up for a full “bell to bell” day of powder slaying? I’ve always found one of the bonuses of the slow-moving Snow Ghost experience to be the chance to get to meet my fellow brethren who, like me, find winter to be the most joyous season of them all. I’ve shared stories with retired doctors whose grandkids now ski these same slopes, met Texans who somehow managed to find North Idaho on a map, learned new lingo from teenagers so fired up about skiing they reminded me why I love it so much, and on perhaps one of my luckiest long rides to the top even shared some priceless conversation with the person who soon became my favorite human and eventually my wife. You just never know what might happen if you simply slow down and enjoy the ride.

“Of all the great ski days in my life, an almost unbelievably high percentage of them have involved riding on my dear old friend Snow Ghost.” Of course, there’s been ups and downs both literally and figuratively as I’ve spent a large portion of my life on this most beloved of frigid winter chariots. So far, it’s the only chairlift I’ve ever had to be evacuated from and I know I’m far from the only skier to make that claim. I’ve spent more time than I’d care to remember gripping that ancient center pole tightly as the wind howled with the chair stopped at what somehow always seemed to be its highest point just before it reaches the relative safety of the midway unload. I’ve had the misfortune of having my season pass taken from me by ski patrol while enjoying the powder-laden slopes Snow Ghost accesses, twice! Then again, I was once the first person to make fresh tracks here on a glorious powder day and continued to lay down fresh lines right there the entire day until the chairlift staff told me it was time to go home. That’s the kind of ski dream nirvana I’ve found so often here. I’ve watched the snow pile almost impossibly high on my thighs while ascending through a storm even though my well-designed gear kept me so warm and dry I felt as though I was at home on my couch. Of all the great ski days in my life, an almost unbelievably high percentage of them have involved lap after lap riding on my dear old friend Snow Ghost. As the saying goes, “all good things must come to an end” so with one eye focused firmly on the future, Schweitzer Mountain Resort has announced this season will be the last for this great chair from which so many fond ski memoires have been made. Where will I be on that fateful day sometime next April when my dear old friend struggles mightily against the effects of time and winds of change? I’ll be right there of course taking one last ride, having one last long conversation, taking a long last look around and raising a glass to honor quite possibly the best friend I’ve ever had. Will tears be shed? Almost certainly. However, they won’t just be tears of sadness for the loss of an old friend, they will also be tears of joy looking forward to what new memories I might create on whatever chariot comes around to carry me skyward in the future. Goodbye old friend, you’ll likely never know how many lives you’ve changed for the better, but each and every one of us will always carry you deep down inside until the last one of us exhales a final winter’s frosty breath. n

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 SNOWLANDER 7 WhitefishMtnResort_CommitmentSkiStay_121318_6H_JI.pdf

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8 SNOWLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

EX-EXTREME Aging out of the terrain park scene and wondering where to go BY CARL SEGERSTROM

n a flimsy plastic photo book with a Freeskier magazine sticker on the front, there’s a picture of what might have been the apex of my skiing career. With my ski tips still at the edge of the jump and my head tucked into my knees like a roly-poly, it’s not exactly a feat of action-sports photography. But it was my first front flip on skis, and I remember it as clear as the bluebird sky on that powder day. I was 12 years old when that photo was taken and flying high on the slopes and in my own mind. I was the only one of my friends who could land flips at my hometown’s version of Mt. Spokane. At the top of my game and only getting better, I was sure it wouldn’t be long before I was doing 1080s and standing atop an X Games podium. But those fantasies were fleeting. A year later I got to cut down to size at a summer ski camp on Mt. Hood. While other kids spun like tops and flipped at will, I cowered at the sight of the big jumps and had to face my first ski-related reckoning: I clearly wasn’t headed for the big time. Despite the reality check, I continued to improve and push my limits. During my teens and early 20s I flipped step-ups, slid tricky handrails and spun big gaps in search of that fine line between fear and success. Riding that line helped get me through teenage angst and high school drama. It also offered a temporary refuge from the nonstop action of

the modern world and the swirling of an unquiet mind. Like so many of the social media generation, I’m prone to scrolling Twitter and Facebook incessantly. Which, I think, is part of the reason I’ve sought out these moments of risk that demand full attention and block out the chatter. That, and the fact that sticking a perfect landing trumps any chemically induced high.

The author’s first front flip on skis. But as I get older, a little smarter and a lot sorer, it’s time to find peace of mind before I end up in pieces. Which, at least for me, is easier said than done. An overcast day a few years ago at Schweitzer sticks out as another moment of on-mountain reckoning. From the chairlift, the jump looked just right. A couple kids cleared it with ease as they gracefully pirouetted from the lip to the landing. So I headed down to the terrain park, watched someone else go ahead to gauge the

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speed and called my drop. I don’t know if it was a bad wax job or one-too-many speed checks, but I landed short of the target, sending a jolt of pain through my knees. But the pain in my body was overshadowed by the internal struggle of coming to grips with the end of an era. As I got on the chairlift with my wife, I already felt twinges of loss. Knowing that my days as a park rat were behind me. Over the last few years this feeling of self-pity and selfloathing has dulled. Now, at age 29, with a fully formed cerebral cortex and a few surgically repaired extremities, I’m looking past the park to find new challenges on the mountain. As I back down from the acute risk of the terrain park, I’m ready to venture into a new part of the skiing world: backcountry skiing. In the backcountry, risks remain and one wrong move can leave you buried under tons of snow. Uncontrolled conditions, hard to get help in places, and the looming threat of avalanches are constant. Out past the lift lines and ski patrol boundaries, the head games are more suited to maturity than rails and kickers. In the backcountry, safety is less likely to be determined by a split second decision on the right speed to hit a jump or how hard to set a rotation. Beyond resort boundaries it’s more about preparation, having the right equipment and knowing how to use it. While it carries its own set of risks, the backcountry is also a place to find that sense of internal quiet I once found in the terrain park. I can’t wait to explore the lesser-trod areas of the Cabinet, Selkirk and Bitterroot Mountains. And I look forward to the isolation and time for reflection that climbing up mountains away from the lift lines and commotion of ski resorts will bring. Stay tuned to the next Snowlander issue (on Jan. 10. 2019) for that particular story. n

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 SNOWLANDER 9

SHOPPING

Micah Genteman says, “I ventured out and did several other things, but when fall would hit, I’d start to miss the vibe and miss the energy and miss the service side of things.”

HONORING WHAT GRANDPA STARTED The Sports Creel starts its 65th year in business

“G

randpa opened in 1954, my parents took over operations in the early ’70s and about 2011 TJ and I had slid into the operations side.” That’s third-generation Micah Genteman describing how deep the family roots go in Spokane’s oldest specialty ski shop, the Sports Creel, which is currently entering their 65th year of business. Micah gave me a quick history lesson on the start: “My grandfather Harry Larned worked for Early Dawn Dairy here in Veradale where he lived, and he had a passion for the outdoors and he had a big family who all had an equal passion for getting outside and doing things in the mountains. In 1954 in the Valley, there weren’t any options from a retail sporting goods standpoint, so Harry wanted to connect his family, his time and his friends to the outdoors, so he created a retail environment which he named the Sports Creel.” Grandpa Harry sold a little bit of everything, from fishing and hunting gear, inboard and outboard boats which led to motorcycles and sail boats and skis. Most anything that was outdoor related was sold at Sports Creel at one time or another. It was the early ’70s when Harry’s daughter Lyn, who was the second of seven kids, and her husband Herb Genteman, started in on their long run at day-to-day operations at the Sports Creel. It was during this period the Sports Creel started to finetune their product line as more and more speciality retail-

10 SNOWLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

BY BOB LEGASA

ers were moving in and covering those items. According to Micah, “There were places who had more time and more devotion to motorcycles, hunting and the archery side of things, so that was what allowed us to kind of get out of that area.” One of the new retailers to move in was Washingtonbased Pay ’n Pak, a home-improvement center that also started selling ski equipment. They moved in close and with a goal. “They opened right across the street from us. They hired my grandpa’s No. 2 guy and set up shop across the street. Their focus when they moved to town: ‘We’ve got to get the Sports Creel outta here.’” “That guy who owned Pay ’n Pak, currently owns Lowe’s. Pay ’n Pak closed. Grandpa beat him,” says Micah with a huge grin. That was a lesson the Sports Creel learned from and passed with flying colors. “During the ’70s and ’80s,” Micah says, “the Sports Creel started fine-tuning what we would sell and focus on the passion, which has been and always will be on the snow-ski side things.” That focus has proven to be true as they enter their 65th year of business. This says heaps since they have seen more than 15 ski shops come and go from this area.

icah wears a lot of hats at the Creel, from owner-operator, manager, shop tech and boot guy, just to name a few. You can sense Micah’s

BOB LEGASA PHOTO

knowledge and his strong passion for skiing when you talk to him; after all he’s only been working in this family business for as long as he can remember. “When I was growing up,” he says, “my parents worked pretty hard to get me out of here. I worked summer jobs at other places while important full-time employees stayed on here. I ventured out and did several other things, but when fall would hit, I’d start to miss the vibe and miss the energy and miss the service side of things. It was time for holes to be drilled, screws to get screwed and people to get up to the mountain. “TJ and I both are incredibly blessed in that what we were handed over is 40-plus years of successful hard work and the cumulative business that comes to us because of how hard my parents worked and because of how hard my grandparents worked.” The family’s hard work has not gone unnoticed as the Sports Creel was voted twice by Inlander readers as the best ski and snowboard shop, and most recently the Sports Creel is in the running for Freeskier Magazine’s “Top Shop” award which is given to Top Shops regionally from the East Coast to the West Coast. I ask Micah what he feels is one of the Sports Creel’s reason for success and longevity as a full-service ski shop. “Adaptability,” he answers. “Being able to adjust through the trends and staying smart in terms of recognizing what was going to be a gimmick and recognizing what was going to make a long-term difference. We pay a lot of attention to service, the way your boots fit, the way your skis glide, the way your bindings function. I think by not making any mistakes there and keeping everything square, that’s allowed us to maintain some solid footing.” Throughout my interview with Micah, the word “generations” seemed to be a common denominator with the Sports Creel and their customers. “There are kids who were my age growing up who

I saw come in here as my friends and schoolmates, who now have families of their own. They were coming in here while my dad was fitting them in boots and now I’m fitting their kids in boots and in some instances, grandkids in boots. So for us, it’s been generations and generations of loyal customers and referral business,” Micah says. Staying current and knowledgeable of new products and techniques is another part of the Creel’s success, as well as having a team you work with that has a wide variety of skills, styles and backgrounds. “I think that’s the beauty of what we do is that there’s enough generations of us and we employ a broad enough range of skiers here that we kind of bring a little bit of everything to the party in terms of our ski styles and where we’re from,” Micah says. “We’ve actually had the opportunity to work with world-class skiers like Noah Wallace and Peter Arneson who are local here in town.” Both Noah and Pete made names for themselves world wide in freestyle skiing. Noah is one of the top riders on the Dew Ski Tour and Pete is a former competi-

LETTERS Send comments to editor@inlander.com. tor who’s turned to judging slopestyle and halfpipe events like the Dew Tour, XGames and the Olympics. After visiting with Micah, I can see that Grandpa Harry’s philosophy and work ethics are engrained. Micah had this to say about Harry and the Sports Creel philosophy: “He was a pretty simple, pretty straight forward, hard-working guy and I think that his vision of shilling up and doing your job whatever it may be stuck with us. … This is all we have, and that’s I think why we give it everything that we’ve got, because we recognize the value of us being here to skiers and we certainly recognize the value of the skiers who come in here to keep the doors open.” n

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Get your head in the game? Snow’s already flying at Schweitzer Mountain Resort, and Sandpoint’s gearing up for a big winter! Get prepped for fun adventures ahead - tune up your boards and skis, make lodging reservations, and check out the buzzed-about cultural scene in Sandpoint! We’re the place to be with fine restaurants, new breweries, and festive events downtown.

See you on the slopes!

Get visitor information at 800-800-2106 www.VisitSandpoint.com DECEMBER 13, 2018 SNOWLANDER 11

WINTER EVENTS DECEMBER

COMMUNITY DAY AT SCHWEITZER The annual fundraising event benefits the Community Cancer Services and Bonner Partners in Care Clinic and offers $10 lift tickets, with all proceeds going to these two local organizations. Fri, Dec. 14 from 9 am-3:30 pm. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-255-3070) MATCHSTICK PRODUCTIONS: HOJI & ALL IN Matchstick Productions’ 2018 ski film was spearheaded by a group of hard-charging women who wanted to disrupt the male-dominated ski film formula. Fri, Dec. 14 from 7-9:30 pm. $14. Panida Theater, 300 N. First Ave., Sandpoint. panida.org (208-255-7801) NICE TURNS FREE TRIAL RUN Sample the Schweitzer program’s offerings for experienced skiers who feel like they’re stuck in a rut and want to boost their skills on the slopes. Dec. 15-16 and from 1-3 pm. Free with lift ticket; no registration required. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-255-3070) 49° NORTH BREWFEST Local breweries from far and wide head to the mountain for an evening of beer tasting, live music and more. Sat, Dec. 15. 49° North Mountain Resort, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah. ski49n. com (935-6649) NIGHT SKIING KICKOFF This year, Mt. Spokane’s night skiing schedule is expanding to offer twice weekly night rides under the lights, with the resort’s full-service cafeteria staying open late and live bands playing on Saturday nights. Offered Wednesday and Saturday from 3:30-9:30 pm, starting Sat, Dec. 15 and through Sat, March 2. $22. Mt. Spokane Ski & Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr. mtspokane.com (238-2220) LEARN TO XC SKI FREE DAY Members of the Sandpoint Nordic Club and Schweitzer have teamed up to offer free crosscountry ski lessons and demos on the mountain’s beginner trails, with free rentals available by reservation. Also includes classic and skate skiing instruction for beginners and snacks and hot chocolate. Sat, Dec. 15 from 9 am-3 pm. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-255-3070) CROSS-COUNTRY SKI LESSONS (49° NORTH) Learn to cross-country ski and tour the trails of 49° North’s Nordic area with the mountain’s certified ski instructors. Ticket includes equipment, trail pass, instruction and transportation (departs from Wandermere Rite Aid, 12420 N. Division). Additional information emailed after registration. Ages 13+. $49. Offered Dec. 21 and 29; Jan. 26 and Feb. 3 from 8 am-4 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) DRESS LIKE SANTA, SKI FREE Wear a full Santa or Mrs. Claus suit when you hit the slopes at Lookout and get a free lift ticket. Santas are also asked to join a “Santa Down-

12 SNOWLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

hill” casual ski run en masse at noon. Fri, Dec. 21. Lookout Pass, I-90 Exit 0 at Mullan. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) NIGHT SKIING AT 49° Head up mountain after sunset during one of four night skiing sessions scheduled this season. Bring three or more cans of food to support the Chewelah Food Bank and get a lift ticket for only $5. Offered Dec. 22, Dec. 29, Jan. 19 and Feb. 16, from 4-8 pm. $15. 49° North Mountain Resort, 3311 Flowery Trail Rd., Chewelah. ski49n.com (935-6649) MOONLIGHT SNOWSHOE HIKES (SCHWEITZER) Schweitzer Activity Center staff lead guided tours through the old growth forest under the light of the moon. Hike is followed by a meal at Gourmandie, with optional wine flights ($10). Ages 13+. $40. Offered Dec. 22, Jan. 20 and Feb. 11 from 4-8 pm. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-255-3081) CROSS-COUNTRY SKI LESSONS (MT. SPOKANE) Learn the basics of cross-country skiing at the Mt. Spokane Selkirk Nordic Area, taught by Spokane Nordic Ski Association and Spokane Parks and Recreation cross-country ski instructors. Fee includes skis, boots, poles, fees, instruction and transportation (departs from Yoke’s, 14202 N. Market). Ages 13+. $49. Offered Dec. 22 and 30; Jan. 5, 6, 20; Feb. 9, 23; and March 3 from 9 am-3 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) MOONLIGHT SNOWSHOE HIKE (MT. SPOKANE) Quietly explore the meadows and woods around Mount Spokane. Guides, transportation (departs from Yoke’s, 14202 N. Market, Mead), headlamps, walking poles and snowshoes all provided. Additional information emailed after registration. Ages 16+. $29. Offered Dec. 22, Jan. 21, Feb. 18 and March 17 from 6-9 pm. Register at spokaneparks. org (755-2489) MT. SPOKANE SNOWSHOE TOUR Learn the basics of snowshoeing during a guided hike on snowshoe trails around Mount Spokane State Park. Pre-trip information is emailed after registration. Includes snowshoes, instruction, walking poles, trail fees, guides and transportation (from Yoke’s, 14202 N. Market). Ages 13+. $29. Offered Dec. 23 and 29; Jan. 6, 12 and 26; Feb. 23 and March 3, from 10 am-2 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) YOUTH WINTER ADVENTURE CAMP Kids (ages 9-12) can learn to ski at Mount Spokane’s Selkirk Nordic Area and how to snowshoe at 49° North. Transportation, snowshoes, skiing equipment, trail passes and instruction provided. Offered Dec. 27-28 and Jan. 3-4 from 9 am-4 pm. Departs each morning from Mountain Gear, 2002 N. Division. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) SKI WITH SANTA The jolliest man around this season takes a break from filling wish lists to fit in a few runs, with a balloon parade on Christmas Eve and carolers in the Village. Dec. 23-24. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-263-9555)

Celebrate New Year’s Eve on the slopes. LOOKOUT TORCHLIGHT PARADE The annual New Year’s Eve night ride down the mountain in the Silver Valley is open to intermediate to advanced skiers who carry a lit torch down the mountain. Spectators are invited to watch the parade from the lodge deck or outside. Sun, Dec. 31 at 4:30 pm. Lookout Pass, I-90 Exit 0 at Mullan, Idaho. skilookout.com (208-744-1301) KIDS HOLIDAY SKI CAMPS Mt. Spokane hosts three-day winter break day camps for skiers and snowboarders of all levels, ages 7-15. Students who sign up for both sessions get a free season pass to use for the rest of the season. $169/session. Offered Dec. 26-28 and Jan. 2-4. Mt. Spokane Ski & Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr. mtspokane.com (238-2220) NYE AT SCHWEITZER Events at the mountain on the last day of 2018 include night skiing, a midnight celebration and toast at the clock tower (free; all ages), a party in Taps ($50-$125; ages 21+), a tubing hill party ($40; all ages) and more. Dec. 31. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-2553070) NYE AT SILVER MOUNTAIN Celebrate the start of 2019 with night skiing/ boarding, a balloon drop and Lazy River duck race in Silver Rapids Waterpark during the annual family celebration and a buffet style prime rib dinner in Noah’s Loft. Dec. 31. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave., Kellogg. silvermt.com (866-344-2675)

JANUARY

FIRST DAY HIKE (RIVERSIDE) Spend New Year’s Day going on a four-mile round-trip hike hosted by REI. Participants learn

SCHWEITZER MOUNTAIN RESORT PHOTO

about the park’s history, flora and fauna and view many of the distinctive structures built by the Civilian Conservation Corps, including the iconic swinging bridge. Snacks and hot beverages provided at the trailhead. Visitors aren’t required to display a Discover Pass because it’s a State Parks free day. No dogs permitted on the group hike. Tue, Jan. 1 from 9:30-11:30 am. Riverside State Park, Bowl & Pitcher, 4427 N. Aubrey L. White Pkwy. Register by Dec. 26 at rei.com/spokane. FIRST DAY HIKE (MT. SPOKANE) Two guided hikes are offered: a moderate twomile snowshoe hike along the Lower Kit Carson Loop Road to the mountain’s snowshoe hut, or an advanced three-and-half-mile hike with a 1,400 feet elevation gain to the historic Vista House. Snacks and hot beverages are provided at the trailhead. Sno-Park permits are required for parking. Tue, Jan. 1; both hikes start at 9:30 am. Register by Dec. 26 at rei.com/spokane. SILVER COLLEGE DAYS Bring your college ID, transcript or current class schedule to get discounted lift tickets (prepurchase online). Jan. 2-4. $39. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave., Kellogg. Silvermt.com (866-344-2675) SNOWSHOE HEADLAMP HIKE Watch the glimmer of your headlamp illuminate the snowy trails as you hike through the quiet forest of Mount Spokane. Snowshoes, guides, walking poles, headlamps and transportation (from Yoke’s at 14202 N. Market, Mead) provided. Ages 15+. $23. Offered Jan. 4, Feb. 1 and March 1 from 6-9 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) SNOWSHOE NEWMAN LAKE Learn the basics of snowshoeing on this beautiful conservation property along Newman Lake. This is a moderate two to three-mile hike with an

BW_PL_inlander_ad_dec_2018_print.pdf

occasional steep hill. Transportation (from Albertsons, 8851 E. Trent), snowshoes, walking poles and guides provided. Ages 15+. $25. Sat, Jan. 5 from 10 am-1:30 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) LADIES ONLY DAY Spend a day with female coaches from the Mt. Spokane Mountain Sports School. Packages include three hours of instruction, breakfast, lunch, a lift ticket and apres party and door prizes. Add rental equipment for $22. Offered Jan. 11, Feb. 8 and March 8. $69. Mt. Spokane Ski & Snowboard Park, 29500 N. Mt. Spokane Park Dr. mtspokane.com (238-2220) JACKASS DAY Celebrate Silver Mountain history during this annual commemoration of the mountain’s founding more than five decades ago as the Jackass Ski Bowl, with retropriced lift tickets of $12. Fri, Jan. 11. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave., Kellogg. Silvermt. com (866-344-2675) CROSS-COUNTRY SKI AT FRATER LAKE Explore this beautiful snowy glacial lake that’s part of the eight lakes of the Pend Oreille Lake Chain. Attendees should have basic cross-country skiing skills. Fee includes staff, roundtrip transportation (departs from Mountain Gear, 2002 N. Division), equipment (if needed) and fees. Bring your own lunch and water. Location subject to change due to snow conditions. Pre-trip information emailed after registration. Ages 18+. $45. Sat, Jan. 12 from 9 am-4 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489)

10/23/18

12:04 PM

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NIGHT SKIING AT SILVER Coast down the mountain under the lights during this special night session, offering lift tickets for $12. Sat, Jan. 12 at 3 pm. Silver Mountain Resort, 610 Bunker Ave., Kellogg. Silvermt.com (866-3442675) LOOKOUT WINTER CARNIVAL The mountain’s annual midwinter celebration includes the famous wife-carrying contest, threelegged race, egg carrying contest, snowman/snow sculpture building contest and more. Sun, Jan. 13. Lookout Pass, I-90 Exit 0 at Mullan. skilookout.com (208-7441301) ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 13, 2018 SNOWLANDER 13

WINTER EVENTS SNOWSHOE + WINE TASTING Enjoy a day of snowshoeing the trails of Mt. Spokane before stopping for a wine tasting at Townshend Winery. Snowshoes, guides, walking poles and transportation (departs from Yoke’s at 14202 N. Market, Mead) included. Additional information emailed after registration. Ages 21+. $39. Offered Jan. 13, Feb. 10 and March 10 from 10 am-3:30 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489) SPOKANE NORDIC SKI WINTERFEST The annual event offers free and low-priced options for the public to learn about and experience winter recreation activities such as cross-country skiing, snowshoeing, skijoring and more. Rentals available on site; or bring your own. Sun, Jan. 13 from 9 am-3:30 pm. $5-$25/demo; free to attend. Mt. Spokane State Park, Selkirk Lodge, 26107 N. Mt. Spokane State Park Dr. spokanenordic.org SNOWSHOEING BASICS Join experienced REI staff for a class on the basics of snowshoeing. The session focuses on the appropriate selection of gear, as well as the basics on what you need and where to go to get started. Tue, Jan. 15 from 6-7:30 pm. Free. REI Spokane, 1125 N. Monroe. Register at rei.com/ spokane. WOMEN’S SKI & SNOWBOARD WAXING In the company of other adventurous women, learn how to wax your skis/snowboard and

14 SNOWLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

SNOWSHOE MOONLIGHT HIKE + DINNER Travel through the winter landscape of Mount Spokane by the magic of moonlight before returning to Selkirk Lodge for meal from Greenbluff Fresh Catering Company. Includes guide, snowshoes, headlamp and meal. Directions emailed after registration. Sno-Park and Discover Pass required. Pre-trip information emailed after registration. Ages 18+. $49. Offered Jan. 19 and Feb. 16 from 6-9 pm. Register at spokaneparks. org (755-2489)

Take a whack at snow bowling at Lookout Pass. how to choose the best wax for the conditions, with expert guidance as you clean and wax your personal equipment. $35/members; $55/ nonmember. Wed, Jan. 16 from 5:30-7:30 pm. REI Spokane, 1125 N. Monroe. Register at rei.com/ spokane NORTHERN LIGHTS The annual mid-winter celebration features the torchlight parade, fireworks show, live music and a party in Taps. Participants over 18 can register online to be in the parade (70 spots). Sat, Jan.

LOOKOUT PASS PHOTO

19 at 6 pm. Schweitzer Mountain Resort, 10000 Schweitzer Mountain Rd., Sandpoint, Idaho. schweitzer.com (208-255-3070) WOMEN’S SNOWSHOE TOUR Tour the trails of 49° North with a guide offering tips on how to have better control and more fun on your snowshoes. Hike is followed by lunch in a yurt. Includes trail pass, guide/instructor, poles, snowshoes and lunch. Ages 15+. $39. Offered Jan. 19, Feb. 17 and March 2 from 10 am-1 pm. Register at spokaneparks.org (755-2489)

WOMEN’S CROSS-COUNTRY SKIING BASICS Join REI staff as they share information and tips for getting into cross-country skiing. Topics covered include fundamental differences between backcountry, telemark and touring ski styles, along with proper clothing and where and how to get started in this winter activity. Free. Wed, Jan. 23 from 6-7:30 pm. REI Spokane, 1125 N. Monroe. Register at rei.com/spokane MOUNTAIN BREWFEST & SNOW BOWLING CONTEST The object of snow bowling is to push the sledder towards pins without the pusher crossing the fault line. The sledder then heads towards the 10 inflatable pins and knocks down as many as possible. Each team gets two runs; helmets required. Open to kids and adults. Lookout also hosts a beer fest with Ballast Point Brewery in the lodge, from 10 am-1 pm. Free. Sun, Jan. 27. Lookout Pass, I-90 Exit 0 at Mullan. skilookout. com (208-744-1301) n

LAST RUN

Some downhill runs stick with you for a lifetime.

HUFF HILLS SKI AREA PHOTO

DEAR OLD FRIENDS It’s time we visit again

BY ALEX SAKARIASSEN

he first black diamond I ever skied was an open ribbon of snow called Rattlesnake, off the main chair at Huff Hills Ski Area south of my hometown of Bismarck, North Dakota. Taking that first shaky, uncertain turn felt like dropping off the edge of the Earth.

Seasons later, a friend and I would fearlessly plunge down the steep fall line along the trees to skier’s left, our descent a hot-dogging series of quick parallel turns. As I grew older and my skis longer, I began to gravitate toward skier’s right, carving long and fast on the shallower

pitch before popping into the air off a roll halfway down the slope. To this day, I can still close my eyes and see every angle and curve of Rattlesnake, every glistening crystal of North Dakota snow. I know it like I know so many other runs. Red Lodge’s famed Lazy M. Kodiak off the backside of Whitefish. Sacajawea on Lost Trail’s Chair 4. These runs have become like old friends. And though we may not see each other every single season, it’s as though no time has passed when we do. We pick up right where we left off. Skiers and snowboarders are, by nature, adventurous. We crave the unknown in the same manner as David Livingstone, Roald Amundsen, Amelia Earhart and so many other famous explorers. Winter is the blank spot on our map, the untouched void where dragons be, into which we hurl ourselves in the hope of discovering something fresh and awe-inspiring. Maybe that something is as simple as a new line through old glades. Maybe it’s as life-changing as the swell of confidence that comes from successfully shredding your first black diamond. But every adventurer must, at some point, return to the familiar. We all have them, our favorite runs. That first cruiser we bombed dowwn as kids. The tree run that proved Mom right about always wearing a helmet. They’re part of who we are, part of how we became the thrill-seeking riders we are today. To revisit them is to remind ourselves why we started strapping planks to our feet in the first place. As a new season begins and I start hatching grand plans in the name of powder, there’s still one run I look forward to making turns down the most. It may not be the steepest or the deepest, but you better believe it’s the best. Hang tight, Rattlesnake. I’m coming for you. n

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… And the things that make playing more enjoyable! By Sarah Munds ARCADE CABINET (A)

MONSTER HUNTER: WORLD (PS4, XBOX ONE, PC) (B)

Did your giftee just build a hella-lit man cave in the garage? I bet it has a pool table, mini kegerator, giant flat screen TV and a bunch of super plush leather chairs. Or maybe they’ve excavated a nerd cave in the basement, complete with mood lighting, video game posters, and a huge collection of Zelda figurines. You know what those rooms probably don’t have yet? An arcade cabinet of your giftee’s favorite ye olde classic arcade games. Turns out, you can buy modern replicas of classic cabinets with hundreds of games pre-installed. Additionally, you can buy these monolithic towers of nerdom just about everywhere, from Walmart to Extreme Home Arcades to Amazon to X-Arcades to custom-built on Etsy. Price points vary dramatically, from a couple hundred bucks (Amazon and Walmart) to several thousand (rigs from custom shops). Before buying, strike up a casual conversation with your giftee about “the old arcade days.” While they’re reliving memories of pockets heavy with quarters, sticky controllers and that neurotic, colorful ’80s arcade carpet pattern, you’ll be taking notes under the table on their favorite games and platforms.

Craft your weapon and set course across the unbroken landscape to nab yourself a magnificent monster or five. In order to settle in the New World, dangerous beasts must be cleared from the untamed wilderness so that the wife and kids back home will have a safe, friendly new frontier to settle. After all, the Wild West was, well, wild before Little House on the Prairie happened. Not going to lie, the original Monster Hunter games were shackled to a steep learning curve. Monster Hunter: World maintained the original gameplay mechanics whilst bringing the difficulty level of the game down to somewhere between “reasonable” and “acceptable.”

RED DEAD REDEMPTION II (PS4, XBOX ONE) (C) Yee haw! Red Dead Redemption II transforms players into the rootin’ tootin’ shootin’ cowboys we’ve always wanted to be. Saddle up and join a gang of ruffian lawbreakers as they cross the Wild West in escape of big bad bounty hunters and fearless federal agents. Touted as a perfect game by every game columnist and

review board on the internet, everyone loves RDR2. Inspired storytelling, thorough attention to detail, seamless integration into the Red Dead series. Cool weaponry, realistic wildlife, kickass physics. Yada yada yada. It’s seriously great. Just do it.

XBOX ADAPTIVE CONTROLLER (PC, XBOX ONE) (D) Engineers went a little out-of-the-box when shaping this controller for disabled gamers. Instead of the handheld bricks we’re used to, this adaptive controller was designed as a large flat pad that maps a number of assistive devices to your traditional controller’s button inputs. This means that for each individual, a set of assistive devices can be programmed to play any game in hundreds of configurations. Some of the assistive devices rock my socks off. The Quadstick enables completely hands-free gaming for quadriplegics (cool!). Another adaptor uses a round foot pedal (instead of a joystick) to move the user in 3D space. Large buttons. Small, mountable buttons. Big-handled switches. Teensy, tiny light-touch switches. One-handed joysticks. Two handed joysticks. Neat. ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 35

NEW YEAR’S EVE

BEETHOVEN’S

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NINTH

DEC 31 • 7:30PM ECKART PREU, Conductor SPOKANE SYMPHONY CHORALE Sponsored By:

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Buy a virtual reality set for literally only this game. Dance Dance Revolution with lightsabers. Guitar Hero with dashing sword slashes. A sneaky way to trick yourself into exercising. In Beat Saber, you hit VR cubes to a musical beat (much like Guitar Hero) and dodge obstacles along the way... but with lightsabers! Yes. Please. You can play with one sword in each hand or even that Darth Maul staff saber (the double-sided one). The music is a jammin,’ beaty cornucopia of EDM, modern hits and techno. Watching gameplay on YouTube is even a blast, with game makers putting in the effort to create sword movements that mirror the Star Wars fighting style (although this game is in no way affiliated with Star Wars).

VIRTUAL REALITY (F)

GET THE

PARTY STARTED

Do I own Beat Saber? No. Do I own a VR headset? No. But I recommend you get one. The downside to VR is mostly the requirement for cold, hard cash. You need a PC to begin with (couple hundred dollars if you don’t already have one like me), and then the VR headset on top of that (more than a couple hundred dollars). So unfortunately, an entire VR setup is a bit spendy. VR also isn’t for everyone — some people get nauseous in virtual reality’s multidirectional movement environment. The upside? Obviously Beat Saber. Aside from that glorious monument of a game, VR has a growing community of indie developers churning out some good stuff. I’d recommend rolling on over to a virtual reality arcade if you’re not sure virtual reality is for you. Aside from the research you’ll get on the technology, it’s a fun way to spend an afternoon.

STARDEW VALLEY (PC, MAC, LINUX, PS4, XBOX ONE, SWITCH, VITA, IOS, ANDROID) (G)

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36 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Oh man, can a game get any more pure and innocent? Clearing land, managing farm animals, planting stuff, getting married to your one true love, mining, tending, raising… a whole basket of adorable wholesomeness. If you liked farming in Minecraft, you’ll love this cute lil’ game. If you like wasting several consecutive hours feeling warm and fuzzy, you’ll adopt this game into your heart with open arms. Stardew Valley isn’t exactly new to the market, but it got a major update this year — now with multiplayer and a bouquet of new content!

OCTOPATH TRAVELER (SWITCH) (H) I liked Octopath Traveler because, as the name suggests, you walk in the shoes of eight different characters. Each character’s individual gameplay focuses on unique storylines, distinctive in the fact that there isn’t an overarching plot for the game. For side quests, think of Dungeons and Dragon’s character stats — thief, merchant, dancer, scholar, hunter, etc. You must utilize your character’s proficiency in each one of these areas instead of mindlessly mashing the same combos, with the same tactics, over and over again. This varies the gameplay and spices up the brain-ticking puzzle solving gamers love.

FORTNITE (PC, MAC, MOBILE, PS4, SWITCH, XBOX ONE) (I) Will everyone just shut up about Fortnite? This game rakes in a hefty $300 million a month because it’s simply so kickass, so if your kiddo hasn’t kneeled at your feet begging yet, they will sometime soon. Maybe you’ve already gifted your child with Fortnite earlier this year? So, wanna know what your tiny humans are up to? Fortnite is essentially an open-world survival game with melee, resource collection and good old weapons-making. A paired-down version, Battle Royale, pits 100 players against each other using the parent game’s mechanics. Interesting factoid: Fortnite: Battle Royale is free to play! Honestly, I’m too much of a filthy snobby hipster to get into Fortnite. To each their own.

POKÉMON: LET’S GO <INSERT NAME>! (SWITCH) (J) Two flavors of the same game caught my eye this year, Let’s Go Pikachu and Let’s Go Eevee. You’ll be the flyest trainer in the region as you cruise around Kanto with your trusty pokemon at your side. Get the Poké Ball Plus, a separate real-world poke ball that integrates with the Switch and feels ultra-authentic. Gameplay is well… on par with what we expect Pokémon games to be. Children are entranced by it. Adults play this guilty pleasure deep into the wee hours of the inky night. But the real question — when will the Pokémon enterprise ever release the planet from its all-encompassing fervor? When will we be free of these tiny whimsical character and the never-ending, high pitched squeal of “piKAchuuuu!”? We will never be free. Open your wallets and submit your cash to the Pokémon overlords. Let’s Go Pikachu? More like cries of “Pikachu, let us go!” n

ideas for the readers on your list By Ted S. McGregor Jr. and Dan Nailen THE LIBRARY BOOK (A)

SWINGING ON A STAR (B)

OUR TOWNS (C)

BY SUSAN ORLEAN One of the great journalists to come out of the alternative weekly universe, Susan Orlean has been tearing it up ever since she started at the Boston Phoenix and Willamette Week in the early 1980s; now she’s a staff writer at The New Yorker. Her interests are eclectic — from orchids, to surfing, to the 1940s canine film star Rin Tin Tin — and her accomplishments many — the movies Blue Crush and Adaptation are based on her writing. Now she’s taken on the catastrophic fire that burned down the Los Angeles Central Library in 1986. She’ll lead you through the mystery of what happened, but ultimately into the silent stacks that have their own surprising tales to tell. It’s Orlean’s love letter to those places she calls “magical” — temples of knowledge that somehow keep on going even now that our lives are digital. (TSM)

BY GARY GIDDINS The noted New York jazz critic Gary Giddins is a definite FOS — Friend of Spokane. He’s made many a sojourn out here to dig through the Gonzaga University archives and research the life of favorite son Bing Crosby. And he’s another alt-weekly veteran — from the Village Voice. His first chapter in the notorious crooner’s life story came out all the way back in 2001; now chapter two is here, Swinging on a Star, and it’s tightly focused on the years 1940-46. Why the compact time frame? Bing Crosby was the face of the homefront to the troops fighting overseas. His eternal “White Christmas” was practically the theme song to World War II — what they were fighting for was hearth, home and the American way of life. And yes, Giddins is planning a third and final volume on good old Bing, so stay tuned. (TSM)

BY JAMES AND DEBORAH FALLOWS Only one more by journalists, I promise. The longtime foreign correspondent for The Atlantic, James Fallows, along with his wife Deborah, has turned his attention to America. Starting in 2012, they flew their own plane some 100,000 miles across these United States. This is the inverse of flyover journalism, as they stopped all over the place, and spent time in many small towns you’ll have to look up on a map. If this is all sounding like Steinbeck’s Travels With Charley (with its own pit-stop in Spokane), the authors thought that, too, and cite that classic as their inspiration. Holland, Michigan; Guymon, Oklahoma; Chester, Montana. These are just a few of the places where America happens, and the Fallows find hope and growth, not the “American carnage” some leaders have described. A civics lesson, and a status report, by one of our most insightful writers. (TSM) ...continued on next page

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 37

EVEN THOUGH ‘CONSTRUCTION SEASON’ IS FINALLY OVER, JAN, THE TOY LADY, HAS SOME GREAT VEHICLES FOR WINTER PLAY:

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38 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

WINE FOLLY: MAGNUM EDITION (F)

BY LIN-MANUEL MIRANDA AND JONNY SUN OK, is there a cooler guy than Lin-Manuel Miranda? He even makes an American Express ad tug at your heartstrings. And he actually has made Twitter a place where something good happens, as this book was born there. Jonny Sun followed Miranda’s feed and his daily affirmations, and was inspired. “Do NOT get stuck in the comments section of life today,” reads one of Miranda’s pithy pick-me-ups. “Make, do, create the things. Let others tussle it out.” Sun, who is a comedian, an illustrator, a student of architecture and now a Ph.D candidate at MIT, tweeted at him, and they ultimately teamed up to create this book — clearly intended as an antidote to all that drags us down these days. (The subtitle: “Little Pep Talks For Me & You.”) Sun’s art, Miranda’s wisdom — most people on your list could use a book like this. (TSM)

BY MADELINE PUCKETTE AND JUSTIN HAMMACK Wine Folly is more than a book; it’s the tip of a media juggernaut. There’s a website, cool swag for sale, a Twitter feed, Instagram wine porn, all in the service of better understanding the wines of the world. Founded as a multimedia initiative in Seattle by sommelier Madeline Puckette and photographer Justin Hammack in 2011, they’ve collected all their greatest hits into this beautiful hardcover that leaps past 2015’s Wine Folly: The Essential Guide to Wine. It’ll fit right into any cozy wine cellar. Puckette has learned the hard way, having lost her graphic design job in the crash of ’08 and falling into a job washing glassware at a Los Angeles wine bar. She was hooked. Featuring maps of wine regions of the world, color guides to wine grapes and even rules for pairing, it’s a colorful, graphic-heavy guide that doesn’t dumb it down, but still keeps it relatable. You’ll definitely glean some fresh wine witticisms and bon mots to toss out at your next tasting. (TSM)

TO KILL A MOCKINGBIRD, A GRAPHIC NOVEL (E)

Founder of the Irish-

sound of Irish music today.

GMORNING, GNIGHT! (D)

BY HARPER LEE AND FRED FORDHAM This American classic isn’t going anywhere. Just named America’s Best Loved Novel by PBS’s The Great American Read, it also just opened on Broadway, with a new play by Aaron Sorkin starring Jeff Daniels as Atticus Finch. So why not a graphic novel version just in case somebody out there hasn’t read it yet? But the artist behind the new version says it’s no excuse not to read the original. “This should be read as well as,” says Fred Fordham, “not instead of.” For inspiration, British artist Fordham traveled to Monroeville, Alabama — Harper Lee’s hometown, where the novel is set. “Everything about the structure of the town in the book is Monroeville,” Fordham told The Telegraph in London. “It was pretty striking.” (TSM)

THEY CAN’T KILL US UNTIL THEY KILL US (G) BY HANIF ABDURRAQIB Author and essayist Hanif Abdurraqib is someone who realizes the products of pop culture aren’t mere diversions, but reflections of American life that serve both to connect and, sadly, to divide the culture. In this collection of works — some previously published, some original for this book — the visitor to Get Lit! 2018 unravels what it’s like to grow up a young black man in America through a series of writings that touch on everything from the violence in Ferguson, Missouri, the first time he was pulled over by police in a white neighborhood, and the musical trash-talk of wrestling icon Ric Flair. Abdurraqib revels in

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his fandom of music and sports and film and sneakers, and he uses that passion to write about issues that affect all of us, whether or not we’re also Ric Flair fans. (DAN NAILEN)

SECURE YOUR OWN MASK (H) BY SHAINDEL BEERS Beers is a teacher at Blue Mountain Community College in Pendleton, Oregon, and her third poetry collection — full of violence and humor and imagery both disturbing and beautiful — is the kind of work that appeals to me simply as a reader (albeit a reader with an exceedingly shallow background in poetry). Whether she’s writing about tweeting neo-Nazis, the bond with her son or gender politics, Beers’ words are evocative and stirring. And when you come across lines like “Curious George loves the Man with the Yellow Hat/But is this really love, or because the man looks like a banana?” how could you possibly stop reading? (DN)

THERE THERE (I) BY TOMMY ORANGE The debut novel by Cheyenne and Arapaho author Orange is finding its way onto plenty of year-end best-of lists and with good reason. Orange’s story revolves around a dozen Native Americans who, like the author, live in and around Oakland, California, their urban experience at odds with the stereotypes of Native life on the reservation. Some of the problems, of course, are the same, and Orange’s characters deal with addiction and depression as well as struggles with their identities. The characters’ lives converge at an Oakland pow wow, where some of them plan a robbery. Orange is one of the featured guests at the 2019 Get Lit! Festival. (DN)

WHISKEY (J) BY BRUCE HOLBERT Spokane author Bruce Holbert won the Washington Book Award for fiction for his last book, and his latest is even better. Whiskey is the tale of brothers Andre and Smoker who live in the region of the Grand Coulee Dam and Colville Indian Reservation (where Holbert himself grew up), navigating hardscrabble lives full of ex-wives, drunken binges and the lingering effects of their parents’ destructive pasts. When Smoker’s daughter is kidnapped by a religious zealot and disappears into the wilds of North Idaho, the brothers have to put their troubled pasts behind them and go to the rescue using their wits — and a wild bear they’ve managed to trap inside a trailer. The story is at turns hilarious and heartbreaking, propelled constantly forward by Holbert’s way with capturing the West and its people in vivid technicolor. (DN)

A KEY TO TREEHOUSE LIVING (K) BY ELLIOT REED It takes a while to get into the flow of author Elliot Reed’s approach in this winning debut novel, but the satisfaction that comes with sticking to it is incredibly rewarding. A Key to Treehouse Living revolves around a young parentless boy named William Tyce, who leads a bit of a Huck Finn existence along a Midwest river. The book is set up as a dictionary of sorts, consisting of entries William creates to explain the world around him as he tries to discover how his mother died and where his father disappeared to. As the entries for things like “Coyotes in the Park,” “Jelly Flytrap” and “Operatic Falsetto” pile up — in alphabetical order — Reed’s story unfurls as a thrilling adventure and eye-opening experience for both William and the reader. (DN) n

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Tickets: 509 624 1200 or FoxTheaterSpokane.org DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 39

Multimedia Gift Guide

SpokaneChildrensTheatre_HappyElfFinalWkend_121318_1U_CPR

T S A A RE IDE G T IF G

ECKART PREU, CONDUCTOR MATEUSZ WOLSKI, VIOLIN SPOKANE SYMPHONY CHORALE EASTERN WASHINGTON UNIVERSITY SYMPHONIC CHOIR Spokane Symphony Concertmaster ˇ Mateusz Wolski performs Dvorák’s Violin Concerto. Rachmaninoff’s choral symphony, The Bells, is loosely based on a poem by Edgar Allan Poe.

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40 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

SPACETEAM (A)

CARDS AGAINST HUMANITY (C)

All board game nights inevitably devolve into shouting. Spaceteam encourages that. Players work cooperatively to fix their ailing spaceship before getting swallowed by a black hole. To do this, they must enact repairs (indicated on orange cards) using specific tools (contained on blue cards). Don’t have the right tool? Ask your teammates. But since you’re all working simultaneously, ask loudly, because everyone else will be. Brace yourself for unpredictability, too, as anomaly cards could send you or a teammate floating off into space. Here’s the real kicker: You’ve got just five minutes to complete repairs or you all lose. Ages 10 and up; $22

Get ready to throw political correctness to the wind. For the past seven years, Cards Against Humanity has excelled at reducing even the most mundane gathering into a raucous and racy laugh riot. Each player takes a turn as the “Card Czar,” laying down a black card with a question or fill-in-the-blank phrase. The rest compete for each black card by finishing the thought with the most scandalous or chuckle-inducing white card they hold. Pro tip: Each Card Czar has a unique sense of humor, so the raunchiest white card won’t always guarantee victory. And if your Christmas giftee already owns the set, consider Cards Against Humanity’s Absurd Box expansion ($20), which creators claim they came up with while tripping on peyote. Ages 17 and up; $25

PHOTOSYNTHESIS (B) People with green thumbs too often go unappreciated. That skill may give you bragging rights in Photosynthesis. This beautifully crafted strategy game pits your species of tree against the rest on the board in an intense competition for sunlight. Players plant and cultivate seeds, growing trees that collect light points and harvesting them to collect victory points. If placed smartly, your trees can block light points from other players. But as the sun rotates around the board, it’s possible your own seedlings could be thrown into shadow, sapping your ability to make your forest thrive. Ages 8 and up; $45

CODENAMES (D) Ever since Hollywood rebooted the Mission Impossible franchise, everyone’s wanted to play spy at least once. Enter a card game that not only allows you to realize that dream but to do so with your best friends as fellow agents. Codenames breaks players into two teams, with a five-by-five spread of cards in front of them. Some of those cards represent friendly agents, others the opposing faction. Each team’s spymaster must deliver verbal clues — one word and one number — to aid the team in

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identifying their own cards. But it’s not just the opposing cards you have to watch out for. There’s an assassin in the mix, heightening the intrigue. Ages 14 and up; $14.89

TERRAFORMING MARS (E) Sci-fi geeks will revel in the opportunity to reshape a planet currently inhabited exclusively by NASA robots. Players of the tile-based board game Terraforming Mars work together to terraform the Red Planet by creating oxygen and water and raising the temperature, all the while competing to earn victory points. Project cards enable them to build infrastructure, introduce plant and animal life, or mine the moons of Jupiter for resources. Each action contributes to the terraforming process, which is measured by increasing the temperature, oxygen and ocean on Mars. The game only ends when all three benchmarks are met, but only one contributor will be declared the winner. Ages 12 and up; $69.95

UNSTABLE UNICORNS (F) Unicorn Army. Just let that phrase sink in. Then build one. That’s the goal of Unstable Unicorns, a hilarious card game that encourages players to backstab their friends at every turn while trying to amass the largest stable of mythical one-horned critters. The rules are straightforward, with each player drawing from the deck for a chance to upgrade their stable, downgrade another’s or simply incite all-out pandamonium. No, that’s not a typo. There’s actually a card that turns all of a player’s unicorns into pandas. Because unicorn armies weren’t silly enough already. Ages 14 and up; $20

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SCYTHE (G) Fans of complex gameplay and alternate history will both enjoy this dive into the rust-and-bolts world of steampunk. Scythe players take on the role of different fallen leaders in Eastern Europa circa 1920s that could have been, each on a quest to regain glory. Those quests involve exploration, expansion, the deployment of mechs and the achievement of hidden objectives. Grow your empire to acquire more resources, and dispatch your army to repel invasion. No two players will chart the same path to victory. Will you be a brash conqueror, a cautious explorer, or the sleeping superpower daring others to attack? Ages 14 and up; $56

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MONOPOLY CHEATERS EDITION (H) Face it. We’ve all cheated at Monopoly at one time or another. Skipping a space, skimming from the bank — these subtle moves get us ahead at the expense of the rules. Now, however, the man in the top hat is rewarding our treachery with an edition where cheating is built into those rules. The new game includes a set of “cheat cards” directing players on how to pull one over on their opponents. Succeed and you’ll be rewarded. Get caught and you could wind up literally handcuffed to the board. May the sneakiest cheat win. Ages 8 and up; $20 n

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 41

The Long Christmas Ride Home is not your typical Christmas show.

THEATER

STRINGS ATTACHED

True to form, Stage Left’s holiday production tackles serious topics with strong language — and puppets BY E.J. IANNELLI

he very first statement director Susan Hardie makes about The Long Christmas Ride Home is both a lure and a caveat. “It’s not your typical Christmas show.” Truer words have rarely been spoken. Paula Vogel’s 2003 play, now in a short-run fundraiser production for Stage Left Theater, is conventional neither in its tale nor the telling. Unlike many holiday shows, even those that flirt with unhappiness, such as A Christmas Carol and It’s a Wonderful Life, it takes a patient eye to find any glimmer of redemption in The Long Christmas Ride Home. Its story around the pivotal moment in a family’s collapse is also recounted through role-shifting actors, sound and puppets, all of which borrows heavily from an ancient Japanese style of performance known as bunraku.

The mention of puppets runs the risk of evoking visions of the Muppets and Sesame Street, and not without good reason. Mainstream musicals and movies like Avenue Q and The Happytime Murders have deliberately played on that huggable, cartoonish style of puppetry for tonal effect. Although The Long Christmas Ride Home employs its own puppets to the same end, bunraku calls for a much different approach in design and execution. “The puppets in this play represent children in a very real way,” says Hardie. “And the play is about what happens to these children based on their experiences with their nuclear family, so they’re not very happy-go-lucky puppets. They’re very real puppets.” That naturally raises a question or two. If it’s important that the puppets in The Long Christmas Ride Home have

a realistic element to them, why not use live child actors? What does the play gain from using strings instead? “It’s just a very effective storytelling tool,” she says. “Because puppets are not real people, they’re a little more of a blank slate where we can layer our own feelings onto them, and I think that’s part of what Paula Vogel wanted to do with this play, to give you a little bit of distance from the story,” which is told primarily through the eyes of Stephen. Along with Rebecca and Claire, he’s one of the play’s three troubled siblings. All three struggle with relationships into adulthood, perpetuating the sad legacy of their parents, played here by Pamela Kingsley and J.P. O’Shaughnessy. The child puppets, designed by Cassie Coleman-Hep...continued on next page

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 43

IMBIBE i t i d o a n r s T of MAGICAL CHRISTMAS the

h 7t ANNUAL

A MUSICAL SPECTACULAR

December 7-23, 2018 KROC CENTER, COEUR D’ALENE

DINNER, DRINKS, MAGIC New Show Added! Sunday, Dec. 16, 7 pm Order Tickets Online:

TraditionsofChristmasNW.com or call (208) 763-0681

110 S Monroe St, Spokane Near The Montvale and Ruby Hotels

44 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Current Shows: OFF-BROADWAY Producer ALL IS CALM: THE CHRISTMAS TRUCE OF 1914 BROADWAY Co-Producer COME FROM AWAY

Produced by Laura Little Theatricals

CULTURE | THEATER “STRINGS ATTACHED,” CONTINUED... pler, aren’t the only ones featured in this show. There’s a mask designed by Kevin Brownlee, puppets by Patti Cardinal and Polly Powell that appear in a Christmas pageant scene, and shadow puppets by Patrick Treadway. Each fills a unique narrative role in the play and is styled visually and operationally to suit. A shadow puppet, for example, “provides another emotional and physical presence onstage,” Hardie explains. In this production of The Long Christmas Ride Home, they’re used during the monologue portions that come after the adults — performed by Cooper Wutzke, Jennie Oliver and Andrea Tate — have emerged, butterfly-like, from their childhood selves. During these scenes, the script has the actors speaking to an unvoiced presence. “There are two very different styles of shadow puppets. One of them is a Muppet-like puppet, so it’s just kind of a head and shoulders. The two ladies, the two lesbian lovers, are more mechanical and more cut-out, true shadow puppets. You can tell the emotional state of the puppet by the way the shadow puppet is maneuvered, and hopefully in context, you know exactly what that puppet is trying to say.” Supplying another vital component of bunraku is Todd Milne, a local musician known for his Far Eastern instrumentation, including a Japanese bamboo flute called the shakuhachi. “He really provides the soundtrack for the show: music, underscoring, the sounds of car chains going through the snow, the sound of hu-

man breath. He’s using the ukulele, wood blocks, a Japanese drum — all kinds of instruments to make these sounds,” Hardie says. “Although it’s not constant underscoring, it’s consistent all the way through. So he’s with us onstage, and I consider him another character in the play because, just as the actors have their voice, his way of telling the story is through music.” To some theatergoers, the relative exoticism and rawness of The Long Christmas Ride Home might seem antithetical to the cheery, celebratory types of WEEKEND productions C O U N T D OW N they’ve come to Get the scoop on this want and expect weekend’s events with around the holiour newsletter. Sign up at days. But Hardie Inlander.com/newsletter. says there are “elements of hope” that puts the play at home in the season, even as it sets itself apart. “Granted,” she says, “this is a show with adult themes and some strong language. It’s also a show, however, that has a tremendous amount of magic. The puppets themselves are magnificent. The writing is so beautiful. And you are just not going to see anything quite like this anywhere else at any time else.” n The Long Christmas Ride Home • Dec. 13-23; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm • $20 • Stage Left Theater • 108 W. Third • spokanestageleft.org • 838-9727

CULTURE | DIGEST

MORE MARVELOUS Your favorite fast-talking ’50s-housewife-turnedstandup-comedian is back for more in season two of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel. Still funny and witty as ever, this season picks up right where the first left off with the evolution of Midge’s stand-up career and the unraveling of her marriage. Supporting characters such as Midge’s father Abe Weissman, played by Tony Shalhoub, get their own major storylines that sometimes distract from the focus on Midge. A trip to the Catskills reminiscent of Dirty Dancing introduces a new love interest as well as a shocking revelation. Binge the new season on Amazon Prime. (MICHAELA MULLIGAN)

Roma and the Netflix Conundrum

BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

f you’ve talked to anyone who has seen Alfonso Cuarón’s Roma, they’ve probably told you that you’ve just gotta see it in the theater. It’s the best-reviewed film of the year, an intimate, meditative, occasionally harrowing portrait of a young woman working as a maid for an upper-class family amidst the political upheaval of early 1970s Mexico. The movie’s rich, textured images are designed to be viewed on a massive screen. Easier said than done. Roma is a Netflix release (it starts streaming Friday), and although it’s receiving the widest theatrical rollout of the service’s films thus far, it’s screening almost exclusively in big cities. The odds it’ll play Spokane are, basically, nil. We small-town plebeians will just have to settle for watching on our couches.

THE BUZZ BIN

THIS WEEK’S PLAYLIST Some noteworthy new music arrives online and in stores Dec. 14. To wit: BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN, Springsteen on Broadway. Couldn’t afford to actually pay thousands to go see Bruce on Broadway? At least you can hear some highlights now, and watch on Netflix come Dec. 15! AZEALIA BANKS, Icy Colors Change. The mercurial performer scrapped her sophomore album earlier this year, but pulls together some jazzy Christmas tracks on this EP. THE DECEMBERISTS, Traveling On. A tasty five-song EP made up of outtakes from the band’s I’ll Be Your Girl album. ZAYN, Icarus Falls. The former One Directioner packed his new double-album with 27 songs. (DAN NAILEN)

That might not seem like a big deal, but Roma, like Cuarón’s previous Gravity, demands the sort of immersion you can’t replicate at home. And I should know: I went to Seattle last weekend specifically to see the movie at the Cinerama theater. With Cuarón’s stunning visuals towering over me, I fell head over heels in love with Roma. It was an overwhelming experience, one I’m happy I had. So we arrive back at the great Catch-22 of Netflix: They’re producing interesting films and making them instantly available, but should you want to see its most visually stunning features on a big screen, you’re probably out of luck. Credit must be paid to Netflix CEO Ted Sarandos for financing the distribution of a vision as bold and uncompromised as Roma. But he can also take credit for this recent quote about his subscribers: “They’re gonna love [Roma] on their phone. … Most people see most movies that change their lives at home.” OK, that last part is true: I’ve never seen most of my favorite movies on a big screen. But at least give an epic movie the courtesy of a screen that isn’t the size of a Pop-Tart. On the opposite side are elitist critics who are rideor-die for the big screen experience: If you didn’t see Roma on a big screen, did you really see it? I did, but I had to drive more than 500 miles through a snowstorm to see it how Cuarón intended. Most people aren’t crazy enough to do that. It boils down to this: See Roma however you can. Play it on your device with the sharpest clarity. Make a night of it. Shut off the lights and give it your undivided attention. Let it wash over you. You won’t soon forget it. n

MORE MONSTERS! The McElroy Brothers are back with a new episode in their web series Monster Factory. If you don’t know their handiwork already, the duo takes the sacred ritual of character creation from popular video games and utterly defiles it. For their latest abomination, they create a character from the Soul Calibur franchise. His name? “Dr. Sexgun.” The videos have caused me physical pain from laughing so hard, and there are dozens available on Polygon and the McElroy Family website. (QUINN WELSCH)

CARDBOARD CHAMP Thousands of Magic: The Gathering players regularly converge in cities around the globe for high-profile tournaments. This past weekend, more than 1,700 players of the 25-year-old collectible trading card game tested their skills on the battlefield at Magic’s Grand Prix Portland event, with one champion crowned: Spokane native Tyler Putnam (pictured). Remarkably, Putman was up against fellow Spokanite Daniel Geiter in the final match. Both players were awarded hefty prize payouts; $10,000 to the winner and $5,000 for second place. (CHEY SCOTT)

LIVING LARGE, AND HAPPILY Come for the Dolly Parton-obsessed soundtrack of Dumplin’, stay for the beauty pageant storylines that show multiple fat women as complex humans who *gasp* don’t have to lose weight to be happy by the end of the movie. While there are some other underdeveloped plot points, Netflix movie Dumplin’ passes the Bechdel test as it hones in on its unapologetic title character and her struggles to connect with her beauty-obsessed mother. With teenage angst and hijinks on full display, it’s an easy, fun flick to cuddle up to on a chilly day. (SAMANTHA WOHLFEIL)

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 45

CULTURE | SPORTS

Dawning of the

Gonzaga Age?

Get used to being part of the big time, Zags fans. YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

The Zags’s trip to North Carolina marks another major step for the program BY WILL MAUPIN

here is a commonly known division of ancient history into three broad time periods: the Stone, Bronze and Iron ages. Each new age radically different than the one which preceded it, and clearly separated from the previous age by society’s mastery of a new material. Overly simplistic, sure, but helpful enough. Such categorization is not possible when trying to arrange the chronology of college basketball. The Zags have been ranked No. 1 in the polls before. It happened in 2013 and again in 2017. They’ve played great teams before, and they’ve defeated too many of

them to count. They’ve even played both North Carolina and Duke in the same season — Gonzaga defeated the No. 2-ranked Tar Heels but fell to the No.-6 Blue Devils — way back in 2006. Now, in 2018, Gonzaga’s schedule once again includes those two college basketball powerhouses. But this year’s Zags don’t look anything like that squad from over a decade ago that faced this same task. It’s as if Mark Few’s current team is armed with steel, an obvious upgrade from the iron — or bronze, or stone, if you prefer — of 2006.

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At some indiscriminate point in recent history, the Zags broke free from the shackles of the past. They’re very much the team of the moment, as modern as it gets. Duke versus Gonzaga in the Maui Invitational championship game was the matchup that needed to happen. It lived up to expectations and the Zags prevailed 89-87. After the game, Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski — a man who has led the Blue Devils to five national championships and the United States men’s national team to three Olympic gold medals — heaped praise on Few and the Zags. “He’s done a marvelous job with his program,” Krzyzewski said. “And it’s an honor to play against him and their fan base and it’s great game for college basketball today.” Michael Jordan’s alma mater, North Carolina, invited the Zags over for a date this Saturday, Dec. 15. And the Tar Heels say they’d like to make a trip to Spokane, too. They’ll check out the Kennel sometime next year. Travelling across the country to play a really good team on the road in December isn’t anything new for the Zags. Thinking about a time when those road trips didn’t come with a guarantee of a return game in Spokane the next season, though? That feels like ancient history. Was it in 2017 that Gonzaga emerged into this modern era? Did making the National Championship game bring this about? Well, it certainly helped lock down Saturday’s game in Chapel Hill. Gonzaga did, after all, lose to North Carolina in the 2017 National Championship game, and shortly thereafter, this series was scheduled. When the title game tipped off on that Monday evening in early April, Gonzaga was still seen as a plucky underdog, even though both Gonzaga and North Carolina had played their way through the bracket as the top-seeded team in their respective regions. This year, in the Tar Heels’ house, a Gonzaga win wouldn’t be seen as an upset. The Zags will be the higher-ranked team. They’ll be the ones with the most talent and the most experience. Just like the Duke game last month, the North Carolina game will be a matchup of two of the best programs and best teams college basketball has to offer. Even though the Blue Devils and Tar Heels have together won 11 national championships, to Gonzaga’s zero, the Zags belong here, which is clearly a departure from the past. This is a new age for the Zags. With a couple more big wins this season — namely, on Saturday, and then again in early April — it would be the dawn of a new era for the sport as a whole. We might already be living in the Age of Gonzaga without even knowing it. n No. 4 Gonzaga vs. No. 12 North Carolina tips off at 4 pm Saturday, Dec. 15 on ESPN2.

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COOKING

Starchy Sorcery Seattle pasta expert Linda Miller Nicholson brings her new book and love of handmade noodles to Spokane BY CHEY SCOTT

inda Miller Nicholson is the living patron saint of pasta. From her flour-dusted kitchen near Seattle, Nicholson spreads the gospel of gnocchi and pappardelle; cavatelli and farfalle; raviolini, rigati, fettuccine, rigatoni, garganelli and culurgiones. The self-proclaimed “pasta ninja” has in recent years amassed an impressive following on social media — she posts on Instagram as @saltyseattle — for her handmade pasta’s complex shapes and patterns, and bright and unusual hues: purple, blue, green, black and even rainbow-striped noodles. She’s made custom pasta for celebrities and has been featured by outlets like the Food Network, BuzzFeed and more. Now, she’s celebrating the launch of her new cookbook Pasta, Pretty Please and hoping to encourage others to try their hand at making fresh pasta tinted with natural plant-based dyes. “Pasta is not like pie dough. It’s not like making cake. It’s extremely forgiving and it’s not an exact science,” Nicholson explains. “If it sticks to your fingers, you add flour, and if the dough is crumbly and too dry, you add more liquid.” While about half of the book’s recipes are designed for more advanced pasta producers, Nicholson says anyone can start learning how to make their own Italian-style noodles with only flour, eggs, a rolling pin (even a wine bottle works as a substitute) and a flat surface. To beginners, Nicholson simply says: “Jump in.” “I’ve made pasta with 5 and 85 year olds. People find they have a great sense of accomplishment when they are done and are super proud of themself,” she adds.

To share this handmade pasta evangelism, Nicholson is coming to Spokane on Saturday, Dec. 15, for an intimate pasta-themed luncheon at Sante Restaurant & Charcuterie (it’s sold out) followed by a free public reception at Auntie’s Bookstore, where she’ll meet fans and sign copies of her joyfully written and beautifully photographed cookbook. Both events are co-hosted by the Spokane Culinary Arts Guild.

icholson’s devotion to the art of mixing together eggs, flour and color-rich vegetables dates back to childhood when, at age 4, she recalls learning how to roll out pasta dough in her grandmother’s kitchen. A love affair with Italian food followed in her teens and early adulthood (including time spent living in Italy), but it wasn’t until later that Nicholson’s passion for pasta making was truly ignited. About five years ago, her then 5-year-old son Bentley was going through a particularly picky eating phase, refusing to eat any vegetables. Just when she felt out of options, Nicholson had an epiphany: She’d make colorful pasta for her son, secretly dyed with healthy veggies! It worked. Bentley didn’t see or taste the hidden veggies, and eventually overcame his picky phase. Nicholson, meanwhile, had discovered her true calling. “I felt like I was sort of always looking for my [creative] medium, and never felt like I could find it,” she recalls. “I thought I could design clothing and that I could paint… I continued to knock on doors and pursue things until I realized that pasta is the one thing I spend more time doing than anything else. Not only did I find my medium, but something that really resonated with a lot of people.” Inside Pasta, Pretty Please, Nicholson shares her carefully crafted and meticulously tested recipes for 25 versions of pasta dough colored with ingredients like paprika, tomato paste, blueberries, beets, activated charcoal, leafy greens, mole, turmeric and more. Instructions follow on sheeting pasta and cutting it into different shapes, from long tajarin noodles to rolled gnocchi. The last chapter contains Nicholson’s recipes for simple and traditional Italian sauces. Before cooks get into the actual how-to, though, they learn more about Nicholson’s personal journey to pasta prowess, along with helpful tips on selecting quality ingredients, pasta cooking methods and necessary kitchen gadgets and tools. “I think maybe my favorite piece of feedback I’ve gotten is that so many people thought it was going to be just a cookbook, but I didn’t realize I was putting all this voice in here,” Nicholson says. “Many people read it cover-to-cover and sent messages saying, ‘Wow, it’s like you’re in the kitchen with me!’” Now that she’s successfully published her own pasta bible, Nicholson is next working on custom building a new pasta-making workshop on her semi-rural property about 25 minutes east of Seattle. She plans to use the space to shoot instructional videos and to teach classes for the public, which has always been an important focus of her work, versus selling her pretty pasta via traditional retail. “I really evangelize making it rather than trying to sell it. If you have counter space and a rolling pin, you can make pasta.” n Pasta, Pretty Please with Linda Miller Nicholson • Sat, Dec. 15 from 2-3:30 pm • Free; $28.50 for book • Auntie’s Bookstore • 402 W. Main • auntiesbooks.com and saltyseattle.com • 838-0206

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 47

FOOD | TO-GO BOX

Baked Bliss A sweet spot in Coeur d’Alene and other food news

here is nothing accidental about the multi-themed appeal of Woops! bakeshop, which opened in downtown Coeur d’Alene this fall at 119 N. Fourth St. First and foremost are the macarons: decadent filling between two light-as-air meringue wafers, like an uptown Oreo. Way uptown. Artfully colored and beautifully arranged, try one ($2.70) or splurge on a box in sizes ranging from a half dozen ($15) to 24 ($66). Macarons are flown in from the chain’s flagship New York location — Woops! is a boutique-style chain — while other items are baked in-house, including cookies ($3.95), muffins ($2.95), and something called rugelach, a croissant-like pastry you might find in a Jewish bakeshop. Add a cup of coffee, latte or other espresso drink made from Woops! proprietary coffee blend. Sandwiches are prepared on-site too, from smoked turkey on ciabatta ($7.50) to a Brie and apple croissant ($6.50). Located in the recently renovated historic Wiggett building, Woops! features floor-to-ceiling windows, lots of plants and a white-on-white vintage décor, giving it an upbeat and welcoming vibe regardless of the time of year. (CARRIE SCOZZARO)

LEARN TO BAKE ARTISAN BREAD AT CENTRAL FOOD

It only happens once a year, so don’t hesitate if you want to learn how to bake beautifully crusted artisan loaves

Learn to make artisan bread with Central Food chef-owner David Blaine. at Kendall Yards restaurant Central Food. The annual hands-on sessions with restaurant owner and chef David Blaine include recipes, an instruction book, a willow proofing basket, a loaf of dough ready to take home and bake and a portion of the restaurant’s natural yeast starter so you can keep making hearty loaves for years to come. Although the class is offered twice in January, the first session on Jan. 20 has already sold out, so aspiring bread makers will need to set aside time for the second class offered Sunday, Jan. 27, from 5-7 pm. Registration (classes are $75/person) must be made in person at the restaurant during business hours. (CHEY SCOTT)

KOOTENAI RIVER INN REMODEL INCLUDES REVAMP OF RESTAURANT

Located 30 miles south of the Canadian border, the Best Western Plus Kootenai River Inn Casino & Spa sits

along a wider span of the Kootenay River as it turns east through Bonners Ferry en route to Montana. Owned by the Kootenai Tribe and managed by Hagadone Hospitality, the Kootenai River Inn has undergone modest expansions since the hotel’s inception in 1986. The most recent renovation brought new carpeting, furnishings and interior design upgrades, as well as an overhaul of the Springs Restaurant and Lounge. Breakfast offers big plate meals like chicken-fried steak and eggs ($14), four different egg benedict options ($11-13) — try the classic Canadian, eh? — and hearty carb-intensive combos like pancakes and French toast ($10). Lunch and dinner menus run the gamut from appetizers, soups and salads, sandwiches and burgers to a whole page of local favorites such as the Selkirk fettuccine ($13) and bacon-wrapped meatloaf ($17), topping out at $25 for steaks or seafood. (CARRIE SCOZZARO) n

O CHRISTMAS CHEESE, HOW LOCAL AND DELICIOUS K E E P IT RE AL K E E P IT WAS HINGT ON

INLANDERRESTAURANTWEEK.COM

48 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

YOUNG KWAK PHOTO

Game of Thrones Catty, razor-sharp and brutally hilarious, The Favourite turns 18th-century social mores and power dynamics into the stuff of dark farce

BY SETH SOMMERFELD

here’s an art to the insult. Sure, the sick burns line delivery just feels intentionally slightly stilted from of Comedy Central roasts can leave people holhow normal humans talk — screams Lanthimos. He lering, but nothing is nearly as devastating as turns the elegant setting of the palace into something a courteous underhanded barb delivered with pinpoint a tad twisted through the use of distorting lenses, the precision and razor-sharp tongue. Granting this, The transition between classical music and scenes scored Favourite is a masterwork in the form. It may be the catonly by two repeating notes, and other tricks. The way tiest film in existence. he frames the indulgences of the elites that fill the castle The 18th-century British tale finds Sarah Churchill conveys how disgusting and vile the whole lot is in (Rachel Weisz) serving as the intermediary and confitheir excesses. dant to Queen Anne (Olivia Colman). The widowed But even more than a distinctive style piece, Lanthiqueen — who, despite trying, was never able spawn an mos serves up The Favourite as a showcase for the actors. heir — is a depressive, socially anxious mess who desJust as Sarah and Abigail battle on screen, expect Weisz perately wants to be liked, so the direct and curt Lady and Stone to battle for the same hardware Sarah essentially rules as her proxy, including managcome awards season. Their performances ing a war with the French and the domestic infighting are both fantastic in starkly different ways, it causes between the military and the elite landowners so your own favourite is purely subjective. fronting the war’s tax bill. But things begin to change Weisz plays Sarah with the stern, when Abigail (Emma Stone), Sarah’s cousin from a detailed steeliness of a hardened, unflapdisgraced side of the family, shows up at the castle in pable veteran who’s not too keen at the desperate need of work. whippersnapper nipping at her heels and After being assigned to lowly maid work, Abigail disrupting her perfectly laid plan. Stone stealthily observes some of Sarah brings a scrappy, conniving fire to and the queen’s secret interacAbigail. She’s craftier than everyone THE FAVOURITE and knows how to not show it, and tions and soon hatches a plan for Rated R upward mobility. Once the queen Stone’s skill lets viewers subtly see Directed by Yorgos Lanthimos takes a shining to Abigail, Sarah on her face when the cogs in her Starring Olivia Colman, Emma realizes that her cousin poses a mind are starting a fresh machinaStone, Rachel Weisz threat. From there, both women’s tion. Colman’s queen is the unstable claws and fangs come out in full fulcrum which binds the two. She force as Sarah and Abigail viciously vie for the power comes off as an overgrown spoiled toddler, that comes from being the apple of the queen’s eye. manically fluctuating between hysteric fits The period piece setting gets bizarrely tilted into and childish glee, while never fully forgetdark comedy under the direction of Yorgos Lanthimos, ting that she’s the one in charge. who has showcased a knack for crafting such off-kilter While the epic farce of The Favourite worlds in The Lobster, The Killing of a Sacred Deer and unabashedly attacks the elite with comeDogtooth. The Favourite is the first of his movies that he dic flair, there’s a certain bleakness to didn’t write since becoming a prominent filmmaker the glass ceiling it only passingly hints — Deborah Davis and Tony McNamara penned the at. Sarah never shows an ounce of sharp script — but it still fully feels like his film. Sure, the weakness and crushes the men premise is grounded in a straightforward reality unlike that get in her way while staring his past works, but the vision — and even the way the unblinkingly right through

them. Abigail takes a more modern spitfire approach, carefully setting up her schemes and wrapping the rubes around her little finger with blunt force and insincere smiles. Both are strong women who have a knack for finagling themselves into more powerful positions than that of the boorish boobs that make up the male influencers of the time. But no matter how clever their plots against their adversaries or one another, they’re still at the mercy of a higher power. “Love has its limits,” says Sarah early in the film. Without missing a beat the queen snaps back, “It should not.” n

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 49

FILM | SHORTS

CRITICS’ SCORECARD THE INLANDER

Vox Lux

DR. SEUSS’ THE GRINCH

FANTASTIC BEASTS 2

THE FAVOURITE

RALPH BREAKS THE INTERNET

ROBIN HOOD

WIDOWS

DON’T MISS IT

Willem Dafoe is getting serious awards buzz for his portrayal of Vincent van Gogh, in a drama about the final years of the painter’s life. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated PG-13

The writers of the Lord of Rings films adapt Philip Reeves’ futuristic novel in which all the world’s cities are now steampunk behemoths on wheels. (NW) Rated PG-13

ONCE UPON A DEADPOOL

THE MULE

SPIDER-MAN: INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE

THE FAVOURITE

In 18th-century England, two women jockey for a position of power within

MIRAI

An acclaimed anime about a little boy who discovers a magical garden that transports him back to the time when his

NOW PLAYING BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY

The band Queen and late frontman Freddie Mercury (played by Rami Malek) get the biopic treatment, and the results won’t exactly rock you. It takes a disappointingly conventional approach to a wildly unconventional figure. (JB) Rated PG-13

BOY ERASED

Based on a memoir by Garrard Conley, a gay teenager (Lucas Hedges) from a Baptist family is sent away to a conversion therapy camp. It overplays its hand occasionally, finding power in its quietest moments. (NW) Rated R

CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME?

In a rare dramatic turn, Melissa McCarthy plays Lee Israel, a celebrity biographer who had a side hustle selling fake letters from dead famous people in the late 1980s. A fascinating character study as bitter and bristly as its protagonist. (NW) Rated R

CREED II

The Rocky saga continues with Adonis Creed preparing to fight the son of Ivan Drago, who killed his father in the ring all those years ago. It hits all the plot points you expect, but the formula still works like gangbusters. (NW) Rated PG-13

DR. SEUSS’ THE GRINCH

The holiday-hating grump gets another animated adaptation, with Benedict Cumberbatch voicing Whoville’s resident Scrooge. Kids might like

50 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

it; everyone else will quickly forget it. (MJ) Rated PG

FANTASTIC BEASTS: THE CRIMES OF GRINDELWALD

The second entry in the Harry Potter prequel series does a lot of wheelspinning, a mostly incoherent and drab franchise builder in which creature wrangler Newt Scamander goes up against wizard fascism. (NW) Rated PG-13

FREE SOLO

A documentary following climber Alex Honnold’s attempt to successfully ascend Yosemite’s El Capitan rock formation sans rope and safety harness. Not for acrophobes, especially in its stunning final minutes. (NW) Rated PG-13

INSTANT FAMILY

Mark Wahlberg and Rose Byrne play a childless couple who adopt a tenacious teenager and her two younger siblings, experiencing all the pains and joys of parenthood. (NW) Rated PG-13

THE NUTCRACKER AND THE FOUR REALMS

The classic Christmas tale gets a truly WTF update, which plays out like Narnia meets The Wizard of Oz meets CGI cacophony. Keira Knightley, Helen Mirren and Morgan Freeman star. (NW) Rated PG

THE OLD MAN & THE GUN

Robert Redford gives his supposed swan song as an escaped con who becomes the world’s most charming

MORTAL ENGINES

Clint Eastwood squints and scowls his way through this thriller, inspired by the

(OUT OF 100)

mother was a child. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated PG

the coterie of an ailing Queen Anne. A lacerating, cutthroat dark comedy with great performances from Olivia Colman, Rachel Weisz and Emma Stone. (SS) Rated R

METACRITIC.COM

CREED II

OPENING FILMS AT ETERNITY’S GATE

NEW YORK VARIETY (LOS ANGELES) TIMES

WORTH $10

true story of a WWII veteran transporting cocaine for a Mexican drug cartel. (NW) Rated R Not a new film, per se, but a slightly sanitized, PG-13 version of Deadpool 2, with new narrative interstitials parodying The Princess Bride. (NW) Rated PG-13

Spider-Men from various dimensions

WATCH IT AT HOME

SKIP IT

converge in the world of a teen web slinger, and they help him find his powers. A brilliant and funny animated feature that looks and feels like a comic book come to life. (SS) Rated PG

VOX LUX

Natalie Portman stars as a troubled pop icon who mounts a career rehabilitation following a personal scandal. An exploration of celebrity and excess from director Brady Corbet. (NW) Rated R

bank robber. A throwback to the films of the ’70s, and based on a true story. At the Magic Lantern. (NW) Rated PG13

RALPH BREAKS THE INTERNET

This animated sequel finds Wreck-It Ralph exploring the vast unknown of the internet in an attempt to stop the shutdown of his friend’s video game. When it isn’t retreading the original, it relies on pop culture references that already feel dated. (JB) Rated PG

ROBIN HOOD

We’re pretty sure this was intended as a hip, modern update of Sherwood Forest’s most famous bandit, though it’s really one of the most generic, unnecessary blockbusters of recent years. Taron Egerton is no Errol Flynn. (NW) Rated PG-13

A STAR IS BORN

This third remake of the classic ragsto-riches story finds a booze-soaked musician (Bradley Cooper) eclipsed by his protege and lover (Lady Gaga, who can really act). An engaging rock melodrama that offers both the glitter of escapism and the grit of serious issues. (EB) Rated R

WIDOWS

After a group of career criminals are killed during a heist, their wives band together to finish one last job. Director Steve McQueen’s most mainstream film is nonetheless artfully made, a twisty thriller with a stellar cast of character actors. (JB) Rated R n

NOW STREAMING READY PLAYER ONE (HBO GO)

Steven Spielberg’s adaptation of the bestselling novel is shiny escapism and nothing more, a Saturday morning cartoon on a blockbuster budget. In the future, a teen orphan searches for a hidden fortune in a virtual reality world with a corrupt tech CEO on his tail. (NW) Rated PG-13

FILM | REVIEW

NTERN THEAT GIC LA ER MA FRI, DEC 14TH - THU, DEC 20TH TICKETS: $9

FREE SOLO (100 MIN) FRI/SAT: 7:20 SUN: 1:15 MON-THURS: 6:20 AT ETERNITY’S GATE (105 MIN) FRI/SAT: 2:50, 7:00 SUN: 12:50, 5:00 MON-THURS: 4:00, 6:00 MIRAI (98 MIN) FRI/SAT: 5:00 SUN: 3:00 MON-THURS: 4:30 CAN YOU EVER FORGIVE ME? (107 MIN) FRI-SUN: 3:15 MON-THURS: 2:30

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OLD MAN AND THE GUN (86 MIN) SUN: 5:15 MON-THURS: 2:10

Into the Spider-Verse stands apart not only from other comic book movies, but from other Spider-Man movies.

Comic Relief

Complex, hilarious and beautifully animated, Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse is an absolute blast BY SETH SOMMERFELD

here’s no shortage of superhero movies populating our big screens. But you know what we’re lacking? Comic book movies. Sure, those superhero films are based on comic books, but they don’t actually feel like the immersive artistic experience of reading a great comic book. They’re mostly action comedies with superpowers. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse is unmistakably a comic book film every step of the way. By embracing that aspect fully — and with a mocking sensibility — it’s an absolute blast. Developed by Phil Lord and Christopher Miller (The Lego Movie), Spider-Verse taps into their brand of irreverent, self-aware humor while maintaining a heartfelt emotional core. When Spider-Man is first introduced via his own monologue directed at the viewer, this Peter Parker fourth-wall breaking acknowledges that we all know his basic story while walking through some beats of the Toby Maguire-led trilogy (including the cringey Spider-Man 3 dancing). But this movie is not about Peter Parker. It’s about Miles Morales (voiced by Shameik Moore), an Afro-Latino teen. After getting bit by a superpower-inducing spider of his own, Miles stumbles across Spider-Man trying to stop the villain Kingpin from using a particle collider that could destroy the universe. The two connect briefly over their shared Spider-Sense, with Parker explaining the world-ending possibilities of the machine and promising training, but during the battle he is shoved into the particle beam, events spin out of control and that training session never happens. But the time in the beam has consequences, as Spider-Man equivalents from alternate dimensions — most notably the down-and-out, flabby, divorced Parker from The Amazing Spider-Man comics series — get sucked into this reality,

eventually aiding Miles as he tries to figure out his own powers while trying to stop Kingpin and return to their own dimensions. Spider-Verse’s animation style stands apart from anything that’s come before. It’s CGI, but done in a way where frames look like 2D comic drawings. A combination of the line work and Ben-Day printing process dots (think ’50s and ’60s comics) instantly reads and fully immerses viewers in a comic book world. There are also wonderfully clever touches, like how comic text boxes start popping up only after Miles gets his powers. Directors Bob Persichetti, Peter Ramsey and Rodney Rothman nail the aesthetic. All the eye candy would be for naught if Lord and Rothman’s script was off, but they clearly have an abundance of nerdy love for the various web slingers, and that allows the complex story to have character depth while maintaining a consistent comedic tone. The introduction of Miles as he poorly sings along to music on his headphones instantly endears him to the audience, and there’s sincerity in moments like the one where Miles goes to buy a kid’s Spider-Man costume because he needs one with these new powers. On the other side of childish wonder is the Amazing Spider-Man (Jake Johnson), who becomes Miles’ de facto mentor and is refreshing thanks to his SPIDER-MAN: worn-out attitude. INTO THE SPIDER-VERSE The enchanting sass of Spider-Gwen Rated PG (Hailee Steinfeld) Directed by Bob Persichetti, Peter Ramsey, Rodney Rothman enters the picture before too long, a strong female presence with a graceful coolness that neither of her male counterparts can touch. The film manages to excel at referential pop-culture humor (the post-credits scene is gut-laugh fan service), physical comedy and most everything in between. The joke potential gets ramped up even further as more Spideys appear — the anime mech girl SP//dr (Kimiko Glenn), the Warner Brothers-esque cartoony Spider-Pig (John Mulaney!), the hard-boiled black-and-white Spider-Noir (Nicolas Cage!!) — all of whom have their own distinctive animation style and unique sound FX, reflecting that they’re pulled from different comics. Between the multiverse plot and wonderful visual onslaught, there’s a ton to take in about Spider-Verse, but by the time things wrap up, it’s hard to not be bummed out that you can’t spend even more time in this overloaded comic book world the filmmakers have created. Here’s looking forward to picking up the next issue as soon as it hits stands. n

BOY ERASED (110 MIN) FRI/SAT: 5:15

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DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 51

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f you call yourself an Inlander, you need to know the stories. Do you remember those ancient ivory tusks pulled from a farm down on the Palouse? What happened after fur trappers set up their first trading post on the Spokane River? Or how a local basketball team captivated the nation? What about “The Biggest Thing That Man Has Ever Done”? A World’s Fair? Those are just a few of the tales that define the rich history of the Inland Northwest — stories that were first retold in the pages of the Inlander newspaper starting in 1993. In Inlander Histories, you’ll meet Nell Shipman, the silent film star who launched her own studio on the shores of Priest Lake. You’ll hop a flight over Mt. St. Helens on a particularly memorable day. And you’ll learn how Walt Worthy kept the dream of Louis Davenport alive in downtown Spokane. Noted local historians Jack Nisbet, Robert Carriker and William Stimson join Inlander staff writers, including Sheri Boggs, Andrew Strickman and Mike Bookey, to take you on a tour of some of the most important moments in the region’s past. Collected together for the first time, Inlander Histories pieces together the tapestry of Eastern Washington and North Idaho culture, creating a rare document of life in the “inland” part of this corner of the continent.

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52 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

SPOKANE,WASHINGTON INLANDER.COM/BOOKS

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HOLIDAY

’Tis the Season We recommend six local holiday shows between now and Christmas BY NATHAN WEINBENDER

Mama Doll will be part of the Bartlett’s annual Christmas Special on Dec. 14.

e released our Holiday Guide a few weeks ago, and it featured a wide selection of Christmas concerts that will get you in the seasonal spirit. But since then, a bunch of local Yuletide shows have been added to the calendars, so we’re rounding up the holiday shows — rock, blues, hip-hop and metal — that we didn’t get to before.

DEC. 14 THE BARTLETT CHRISTMAS SPECIAL Now in its fifth year, the annual Bartlett Christmas special has gathered a diverse group of local performers playing a deep roster MORE EVENTS of holiday musical Visit Inlander.com for classics. But the best complete listings of thing about it: Each local events. artist writes an original Christmas song, and they’re all recorded and released on an EP that’s for sale at the event. Maybe one will be a future holiday staple. This year’s performers include the party-pop collective Super Sparkle, folk quartet Mama Doll, singer-songwriter Dario Ré, fiddler and vocalist Jenny Anne Mannan and electro-pop duo Mountains in the Sea. $15, all ages, 8 pm.

DEC. 15 HOLIDAY DANCE PARTY Berserk opened this summer and has since become a go-to downtown destination, and the bar is celebrating its first Christmas with a dance party. DJ Case will be on the ones and twos all night, and donations will go toward local artist Susan Webber, who recently completed cancer treatment. Donations accepted, 21+, 9 pm.

DEC. 21-22 THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS Now under new ownership, the Pin continues to be a haven for local hard-rock, metal and hip-hop. The all-ages venue is ringing in the Christmas season with a free two-day event, featuring a stacked lineup of regional artists. Performers include the Ongoing Concept, Alive in Barcelona, Age of Nefilim, Blacktracks and many more. Free, all ages, 6 pm.

DEC. 21 HOLIDAY HIP-HOP The Bartlett isn’t content with hosting just one holiday concert this year. Get back into the spirit again with their hip-hop Christmas show, which features the rap-funk

ERICK DOXEY PHOTO

fusion of Kung Fu Vinyl (formerly KALAJ) alongside rappers Jaeda, Matisse, Briscoe and Savvy Rae. $8, all ages, 8 pm.

DEC. 22 ROCK ’N’ ROLL CHRISTMAS STORY As one of downtown’s most beloved rock venues, it’s only appropriate that the Observatory’s holiday show would bring together some of Spokane’s most reliable bands. Pine League, Atari Ferrari and Fun Ladies are all hitting the stage with their undeniable power-pop melodies, and they’re sure to get you moving. $7, 21+, 9 pm.

DEC. 22 SAMMY EUBANKS’ BLUE CHRISTMAS Any Inland Northwest blues aficionado worth their salt is familiar with Sammy Eubanks, one of the most prominent and longest-running fixtures of the regional blues circuit. Eubanks will be taking to the Knitting Factory stage again this year for his Blue Christmas holiday concert, which will no doubt involve his bluesy takes on holiday classics and will also feature the ace guitarist’s musician friends joining in. Free, 21+, 8 pm. n

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 53

MUSIC | SOUND ADVICE

COUNTRY BRANDY CLARK

ven though she was raised in the small logging town of Morton, Washington, Brandy Clark has been a Nashville regular for nearly two decades. As a country songwriter, Clark has collaborated with the likes of Keith Urban, Reba McEntire and Kacey Musgraves, and she contributed to such Top 10 country hits with “Mama’s Broken Heart” by Miranda Lambert and the Band Perry’s “Better Dig Two.” But she’s also had success as a solo artist, with her 2016 LP Big Day in a Small Town, a record of vivid character pieces, receiving a Grammy nomination for country album of the year. You can catch Clark as a part of the upcoming Appalachian Christmas show alongside fiddler Mark O’Connor, but keep your eye on her still burgeoning solo career. — NATHAN WEINBENDER

J = THE INLANDER RECOMMENDS THIS SHOW J = ALL AGES SHOW

ROCK LIKE A STORM

Thursday, 12/13

BERSERK, Vinyl Meltdown J J THE BIG DIPPER, Down North, Kung Fu Vinyl, Icky Business BOLO’S, Inland Empire Blues Society Monthly Blues Boogie J BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE, The Song Project J BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB, Open Jazz Jam with Erik Bowen CRUISERS, Open Jam Night DARCY’S RESTAURANT & SPIRITS, Old School Dance Music and Karaoke w/DJ Dave IDAHO POUR AUTHORITY, Grateful Dead Jam Night THE JACKSON ST., Zaq Flanary and the Songsmith Series THE LANTERN TAP HOUSE, Bart Budwig, Sarah Berentson MOONDOLLARS BISTRO, Jack Bayliss Rhythm and Blues NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), PJ Destiny THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos feat. Christan Raxter & Steve Ridler THE ROXIE, Glenn and Rachael SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE, KOSH ZOLA, Blake Braley

Friday, 12/14

219 LOUNGE, Muffy and the Riff Hangers THE AGING BARREL, Just Plain Darin ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS, Sara Brown J J THE BARTLETT, Bartlett Christmas Special (see page 69) feat. Super Sparkle, Mama Doll, Dario Re, Caleb & Jenny Anne Mannan

54 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

Mark O’Connor’s Appalachian Christmas with Brandy Clark • Sat, Dec. 15 at 7 pm • $28-$48 • All ages • Martin Woldson Theater at the Fox • 1001 W. Sprague • foxtheaterspokane.org • 624-1200

hen you think of hard rock, what sounds float through your head? Muscular guitars, probably. Powerful, insistent drums, too. Most certainly some soaring, throat-shredding vocals. But what about the didgeridoo? The New Zealand group Like a Storm have been incorporating the sounds of their home country into their thrash-friendly metal, and the hefty wind instrument works its way into the songs as if it’s always been an integral part of the genre. The band — which features brothers Chris, Matt and Kent Brooks alongside drummer Zach Wood — has played Spokane numerous times, and they’re returning behind their recent album called Catacombs, which offers plenty of anthemic choruses and undeniable riffs. And yes, plenty of didgeridoo. — NATHAN WEINBENDER Like a Storm • Wed, Dec. 19 at 7:30 pm • $15 • All ages • Knitting Factory • 228 W. Sprague • sp.knittingfactory.com • 224-3279 BOLO’S, Dangerous Type BOOMBOX PIZZA, Karaoke BRIDGE PRESS CELLARS, Bobby Patterson Band THE BULL HEAD, Last Chance Band CORBY’S BAR, Karaoke COSMIC COWBOY GRILL, Rusty Jackson CRUISERS, Karaoke with Gary CURLEY’S, Haze DARCY’S RESTAURANT & SPIRITS, Karaoke and Dancing w/DJ Dave DI LUNA’S CAFE, Beth Pederson & Bruce Bishop CD Release Concert EICHARDT’S, Bright Moments FARMHOUSE KITCHEN AND SILO BAR, Tom D’Orazi and Friends

J J MARTIN WOLDSON THEATER AT THE FOX, Myles Kennedy & Co (see page 22) FREDNECK’S, Gil Rivas HILLYARD LIBRARY SPORTS BAR & BARBERSHOP, Jan Harrison Blues Experience HOGFISH, Dysfunktynal Kaos, Twelve Gauge Saints IDAHO POUR AUTHORITY, Mike and Shanna Thompson IRON GOAT BREWING CO., Kori Ailene IRON HORSE (COEUR D’ALENE), Rewind JOHN’S ALLEY, DJ Miles’ End of the Semester Party LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Carey Brazil

MARYHILL WINERY, Nick Grow MASSELOW’S STEAKHOUSE, Tom Pletscher MAX AT MIRABEAU, Kosta La Vista MICKDUFF’S BEER HALL, Ron Greene MOOSE LOUNGE, Loose Gazoonz MULLIGAN’S BAR & GRILLE, Casey Ryan NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night with Luke Jaxon and DJ Tom NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), Royale NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Tom Pletscher J OUTLAW BBQ & CATERING MARKET, Songsmith Series feat. Darren Eldridge

PACIFIC PIZZA, The Dapper Devils, Tyler Aker PATIT CREEK CELLARS, Ken Davis In Transit PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Mike & Sadie J THE PIN, Bryan Torch, Champagne James, Indi & DJ Rebel with Special Guests RED ROOM LOUNGE, DJ Exodus THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos feat. Christan Raxter & Steve Ridler THE ROCK BAR & LOUNGE, Current Flow V DU V WINES, Big Red Barn ZOLA, Pastiche

Saturday, 12/15

1210 TAVERN, Jan Harrison Blues Experience 219 LOUNGE, Right Front Burner BOLO’S, Dangerous Type CEDAR STREET BRIDGE, Meg Turner & Chris Lynch CHECKERBOARD BAR, One Louder Bänd COSMIC COWBOY GRILL, Bill Bozly CRUISERS, Grim Statistic, AA Bottom CURLEY’S, Haze FREDNECK’S, Just Plain Darin GARLAND PUB, Last Chance Band HOGFISH, Bret Allen, High Note, Jimmy Nuge, Brian Betterton HUMBLE BURGER, Rock N Roll Xmas with RSTV, Help Yourself, Meddling IDAHO POUR AUTHORITY, Ron Kieper Jazz Trio IRON GOAT BREWING, Matt Mitchell IRON HORSE (CDA), Rewind THE JACKSON ST., Karaoke THE LARIAT INN, Sammy Eubanks LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Chuck Dunlop J J MARTIN WOLDSON THEATER AT THE FOX, Mark O’Connor with Brandy Clark (see facing page) MARYHILL WINERY, Daniel Hall

GET LISTED! Submit events online at Inlander.com/getlisted or email relevant details to getlisted@inlander.com. We need the details one week prior to our publication date. MASSELOW’S STEAKHOUSE, Tom Pletscher MATCHWOOD BREWING CO., The Wow Wows MAX AT MIRABEAU, Kosta La Vista MICKDUFF’S BEER HALL, The Groove Black MOOSE LOUNGE, Loose Gazoonz MULLIGAN’S, Son of Brad NASHVILLE NORTH, Ladies Night with Luke Jaxon and DJ Tom NIGHTHAWK LOUNGE (CDA CASINO), Royale NORTHERN QUEST RESORT & CASINO, Tom Pletscher OMEGA EVENT CENTER, Champagne Drip with Yeckler, VitaminV, Clarkus, MACS J ONE WORLD CAFE, Jackie McIntyre Fox & Brad Keeler THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos THE ROXIE, Nick Wiebe J SLICE & BISCUIT, Andru Gomez Christmas with Izzy Burns SPOKANE TRIBE CASINO, Christy Lee STORMIN’ NORMAN’S SHIPFACED SALOON, Karaoke ZOLA, Pastiche

Sunday, 12/16

THE BLIND BUCK, Show Tune SingAlong Sundays CRAVE, DJ Dave DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS, Rev. Yo’s VooDoo Church Jam GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke IRON HORSE (VALLEY), Kicho J KNITTING FACTORY, Nothing More, Everyone Loves a Villain, Alive in Barcelona

LINGER LONGER LOUNGE, Open Jam MARYHILL WINERY, Mary Chavez O’DOHERTY’S, Live Irish Music PEND D’OREILLE WINERY, Piano Sunday with Peter Lucht J SOUTH HILL GRILL, Just Plain Darin STORMIN’ NORMAN’S SHIPFACED SALOON, Karaoke ZOLA, Lazy Love

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Monday, 12/17

THE BULL HEAD, Songsmith Series J CALYPSOS COFFEE & CREAMERY, Open Mic CHECKERBOARD BAR, Open Mic CRAVE, DJ Dave EICHARDT’S, Jam with Truck Mills LAUGHING DOG BREWING, Jake Robins RED ROOM LOUNGE, Open Mic with Lucas Brookbank Brown ZOLA, Perfect Mess

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Tuesday, 12/18

219 LOUNGE, Karaoke with DJ Pat J THE BARTLETT, Holiday Open Mic BOOMBOX PIZZA, Karaoke CRAVE, DJ Dave GARLAND PUB & GRILL, Karaoke LEFTBANK WINE BAR, Turntable Tue. THE OBSERVATORY, Musician’s Open Mic THE PIN, Community Tuesdays with AyZiM & Friends RAZZLE’S BAR & GRILL, Open Mic Jam THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Country Swing Dancing THE VIKING, Local Lounge Night UP NORTH DISTILLERY, Cris Lucas ZOLA, Dueling Cronkites

Wednesday, 12/19

219 LOUNGE, Truck Mills and Carl Rey BLACK DIAMOND, Songsmith Series feat. Frankie Ghee CRAVE, DJ Dave CRUISERS, Open Jam Night GENO’S, Open Mic IRON HORSE (CDA), Open Jam THE JACKSON ST., Karaoke JOHN’S ALLEY, Bart Budwig’s Holiday Band J J KNITTING FACTORY, Like a Storm (see facing page), Palisades, Farewell to Fear, Helldorado J THE LOCAL DELI, Devon Wade LUCKY’S IRISH PUB, DJ D3VIN3 MILLWOOD BREWING COMPANY, Dylan Hathaway J THE PIN, Something Witchy, Quarter Monkey, Jimmy Nuge J RED DRAGON CHINESE, Tommy G RED ROOM LOUNGE, Blowin’ Kegs Jam Session THE RIDLER PIANO BAR, Dueling Pianos THE ROXIE, Spokane Music Challenge ZOLA, Cruxie

Coming Up ...

J THE BARTLETT, Kung Fu Vinyl, Jaeda, Matisse, Briscoe, Savvy Rae, Dec. 21 J THE BARTLETT, Haley and the Hitchhikers, Tyler Alai, Dec. 22 J KNITTING FACTORY, Sammy Eubanks Blue Christmas, Dec. 22

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MUSIC | VENUES 219 LOUNGE • 219 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-2639934 315 MARTINIS & TAPAS • 315 E. Wallace, CdA • 208-667-9660 ARBOR CREST WINE CELLARS • 4705 N. Fruit Hill Rd. • 927-9463 BABY BAR • 827 W. First Ave. • 847-1234 BARLOWS • 1428 N. Liberty Lake Rd. • 924-1446 THE BARTLETT • 228 W. Sprague Ave. • 747-2174 BEEROCRACY • 911 W. Garland Ave. BERSERK • 125 S. Stevens • 714-9512 THE BIG DIPPER • 171 S. Washington • 863-8098 BIGFOOT PUB • 9115 N. Division St. • 467-9638 BING CROSBY THEATER • 901 W. Sprague Ave. • 227-7638 BLACK DIAMOND • 9614 E. Sprague • 891-8357 BOLO’S • 116 S. Best Rd. • 891-8995 BOOMERS • 18219 E. Appleway Ave. • 755-7486 BOOTS BAKERY & LOUNGE • 24 W. Main Ave. • 703-7223 BUCER’S COFFEEHOUSE PUB • 201 S. Main, Moscow • 208-882-5216 BUZZ COFFEEHOUSE • 501 S. Thor • 340-3099 CALYPSOS COFFEE & CREAMERY • 116 E. Lakeside Ave., CdA • 208-665-0591 CHATEAU RIVE • 621 W. Mallon Ave. • 795-2030 CHECKERBOARD BAR • 1716 E. Sprague Ave. • 535-4007 COEUR D’ALENE CASINO • 37914 S. Nukwalqw Rd., Worley, Idaho • 800-523-2464 COEUR D’ALENE CELLARS • 3890 N. Schreiber Way, CdA • 208-664-2336 CRAFTED TAP HOUSE • 523 Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-292-4813 CRAVE• 401 W. Riverside • 321-7480 CRUISERS • 6105 W Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208773-4706 CURLEY’S • 26433 W. Hwy. 53 • 208-773-5816 DALEY’S CHEAP SHOTS • 6412 E. Trent • 535-9309 EICHARDT’S PUB • 212 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-263-4005 THE FEDORA • 1726 W. Kathleen, CdA • 208-7658888 FIZZIE MULLIGANS • 331 W. Hastings • 466-5354 FOX THEATER • 1001 W. Sprague • 624-1200 THE HIVE • 207 N. First, Sandpoint • 208-457-2392 HOGFISH • 1920 E. Sherman, CdA • 208-667-1896 HOLLYWOOD REVOLVER BAR • 4720 Ferrel, CdA • 208-274-0486 HOUSE OF SOUL • 120 N. Wall • 217-1961 IRON HORSE BAR • 407 E. Sherman Ave., CdA • 208-667-7314 IRON HORSE BAR & GRILL • 11105 E. Sprague Ave., CdA • 509-926-8411 JACKSON ST. BAR & GRILL • 2436 N. Astor St. • 315-8497 JOHN’S ALLEY • 114 E. Sixth St., Moscow • 208883-7662 KNITTING FACTORY • 911 W. Sprague Ave. • 244-3279 LAGUNA CAFÉ • 2013 E. 29th Ave. • 448-0887 THE LANTERN TAP HOUSE • 1004 S. Perry St. • 315-9531 LEFTBANK WINE BAR • 108 N. Washington • 315-8623 LUCKY’S IRISH PUB • 408 W. Sprague • 747-2605 MARYHILL WINERY • 1303 W. Summit Pkwy, Ste. 100 • 443-3832 MAX AT MIRABEAU • 1100 N. Sullivan • 924-9000 MICKDUFF’S • 312 N. First Ave., Sandpoint • 208)255-4351 MONARCH MOUNTAIN COFFEE • 208 N 4th Ave, Sandpoint • 208-265-9382 MOOSE LOUNGE • 401 E. Sherman • 208-664-7901 MOOTSY’S • 406 W. Sprague • 838-1570 MULLIGAN’S • 506 Appleway Ave., CdA • 208- 7653200 ext. 310 NASHVILLE NORTH • 6361 W. Seltice Way, Post Falls • 208-457-9128 NECTAR CATERING & EVENTS • 120 N. Stevens St. • 869-1572 NORTHERN QUEST RESORT • 100 N. Hayford Rd., Airway Heights • 242-7000 NYNE • 232 W. Sprague Ave. • 474-1621 THE OBSERVATORY • 15 S. Howard • 381-5489 OMEGA EVENT CENTER • 25 E. Lincoln Rd. O’SHAY’S • 313 E. CdA Lake Dr. • 208-667-4666 PEND D’OREILLE WINERY • 301 Cedar St., Sandpoint • 208-265-8545 THE PIN! • 412 W. Sprague • 368-4077 RED LION RIVER INN • 700 N. Division • 326-5577 RED ROOM LOUNGE • 521 W. Sprague • 838-7613 REPUBLIC BREWING • 26 Clark Ave. • 775-2700 RIDLER PIANO BAR • 718 W. Riverside • 822-7938 RIVELLE’S • 2360 N Old Mill Loop, CdA • 208-9300381 SEASONS OF COEUR D’ALENE • 209 E. Lakeside Ave. • 208-664-8008 THE SHOP • 924 S. Perry St. • 534-1647 SOULFUL SOUPS & SPIRITS • 117 N. Howard St. • 459-1190 SPOKANE ARENA • 720 W. Mallon • 279-7000 THE THIRSTY DOG • 3027 E. Liberty Ave. • 487-3000 TIMBER GASTRO PUB •1610 E Schneidmiller, Post Falls • 208-262-9593 ZOLA • 22 W. Main Ave. • 624-2416

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 55

FILM YULE CRACK UP

Fill your commemorative Walley World mug with eggnog and wrap yourself in your rattiest Cousin Eddie bathrobe: We’re bringing National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation back to the Garland Theater for our next Suds & Cinema screening. The 1989 holiday favorite, about Clark Griswold’s mad (and often failed) endeavors to give his extended family the perfect Christmas, has become an annual tradition for us, and it sells out pretty much every year. But since the spirit of the season has possessed us, we’re showing the film twice in one night. Rainier will be pouring pints and handing out swag, and they’ll also have a snowboard and YETI cooler that you can enter to win. And if you have a particularly ugly Christmas sweater in the back of your closet, it might be in your best interest to dig it out: That knitted monstrosity could get you a $100 Visa gift card, courtesy of Horizon Credit Union. — NATHAN WEINBENDER Suds & Cinema: National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation • Thu, Dec. 20 at 6 pm (sold-out) and 9 pm • $5 • Garland Theater • garlandtheater.com • 327-2509 • Advance tickets available at the Garland box office

56 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

DRINK CLAUS CRAWL

JAZZ BUBLE HOLIDAY

SantaCon Spokane • Sat, Dec. 15 at 6 pm • Free • Ages 21+ • Beerocracy • 911 W. Garland • facebook.com/santaconspokane

Spokane Jazz Orchestra with Jace Fogleman: The Sounds of Michael Buble • Sat, Dec. 15 at 7:30 pm • $30-$35 • All ages • Bing Crosby Theater • 901 W. Sprague • bingcrosbytheater.com • 227-7638

At their worst, a SantaCon can be a massive headache for cities and their restaurants and bars as a bunch of lubed-up Kris Kringles act in the sort of amateurish ways one expects on New Year’s Eve. Just search “SantaCon Nightmares” on YouTube for some examples. At their best, though, a good Santa pub crawl brings a bunch of jovial folks together for spirited holiday fun that also injects some bucks into the local economy (while also making for some memorable Instagram moments for unsuspecting bar patrons). This year’s SantaCon Spokane takes the fun to the Garland Neighborhood, where the tight array of stops should be ideal. It also comes at the end of a Winter Wonderland Celebration thrown by the Garland Business District, so get yourself a Santa suit and make a day of it. — DAN NAILEN

At face value, the Spokane Jazz Orchestra’s Christmas show is worth a visit, thanks to the presence of guest vocalist Jace Fogleman doing the holiday songs Canadian crooner Michael Buble loves, and the typical excellence of the country’s longest-running community-supported jazz orchestra. But this year’s concert takes on a special meaning as it will be the final show for trumpet player Keith LaMott, who’s performed with SJO for 43 years. LaMott has served in several roles with the orchestra, from music director to president of the board of trustees, and he’ll play a special farewell solo at Saturday’s show. — DAN NAILEN

GET LISTED! Submit events online at Inlander.com/getlisted or email relevant details to getlisted@inlander.com. We need the details one week prior to our publication date.

EVENTS | CALENDAR

BENEFIT SANTA EXPRESS The annual retail store allows children to shop for affordable holiday gifts for family and friends, with proceeds benefiting the Vanessa Behan Crisis Nursery. Open to ages 4-12; items priced between 50 cents and $8. Through Dec. 23; Mon-Fri 11 am-8 pm, Sat 10 am-8 pm and Sun 11 am-6 pm. River Park Square, 808 W. Main. santaexpress.org TREE OF SHARING Support local families and children in need. Tables located at NorthTown Mall, Spokane Valley Mall and River Park Square. Gift deadline is Dec. 17. treeofsharing.org ARTCHOWDER PARTY FOR RMHC Art Chowder and Spokane Gallery celebrat the holidays with a release party to benefit Ronald McDonald House Charities. Includes a silent auction with local artists’ work. Dec. 20, 5-8 pm. Spokane Gallery and Framing, 409 S. Dishman Mica Rd. pacificflywaygallery.blogspot.com

COMEDY ARTS GIFTS GALORE

If you waited until nearly the last minute to get holiday gifts for all the good boys and girls on your list this year, you’re in luck. Terrain has pulled out all the stops to host a winter version of Bazaar, its massively successful, juried spring arts market. Happening on one of the busiest in-person shopping days of the year, BrrrZaar hosts 70 local artisans and makers on two floors of River Park Square who each present their handmade inventories for your gift-buying ease. The event also boasts live music by local talent and a bar pouring No-Li beers and Townshend Cellar wine. If you swing by late in the day, look for “Bad Santa” taking over beneath the mall’s massive Christmas tree from 8-10 pm, photo ops included. — CHEY SCOTT BrrrZaar • Sat, Dec. 15 from 11 am-10 pm • Free admission • All ages • River Park Square • 808 W. Main • bit.ly/BrrrZAAR2018

THEATER THE LYIN’ KING

King Lear may be the theater’s most famous depiction of a ruler descending into insanity, but a real-world monarch inspired another great play about a powerful man’s follies. The Madness of George III details the British king’s erratic behavior in the final years of his life and how it affected his closest associates and the country at large, told with a dark comic edge by playwright Alan Bennett (Forty Years On, The History Boys). The Bing’s ongoing Stage to Screen series will be presenting a filmed performance of a recent revival of the play, starring Game of Thrones’ Mark Gatiss as the titular king, and it’s as much a compelling historical drama as it is a portrait of how mental illness was treated in the 19th century. — NATHAN WEINBENDER Stage to Screen: The Madness of George III • Sun, Dec. 16 at 2 pm • $10/ general, $4/students • Bing Crosby Theater • 901 W. Sprague • bingcrosbytheater.com • 227-7638

COMEDY NIGHT Mark Morris comedy returns to Springdale with comedian and co-host of the Huglife podcast Mike Coletta and touring headliner and Seattle International Comedy Competition finalist Harry J Riley. Hosted by Steve Johnson. Dec. 13, 8-9:30 pm. $10. Brothers Bar, 111 W. Shaffer Ave. (258-8875) GIRL POWER A 90 minute comedy show featuring all female comics. Dec. 13, 7:30 pm. $8-$14. Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague. (318-9998) COLLIN MOULTON Collin had his own stand-up special on Showtime, and has appeared on Nickelodeon and Last Call with Carson Daly. Dec. 14 at 7:30 pm, Dec. 15 at 7:30 and 10 pm. $10-$22. Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague. spokanecomedyclub.com (509-318-9998) MARK MORRIS COMEDY NIGHTS Featuring co-host of the Huglife podcast Mike Coletta with Seattle International Comedy Competition finalist Harry J Riley. 25 percent of proceeds support The Holiday Assistance Program at the Armory, aiding disabled vets and veteran’s families in need. Dec. 14, 8-9:30 pm. $10/$12. American Legion Post 142, 1138 Poleline Rd. bit.ly/2zVrJdW REMIXMAS CAROL The BDT players take elements of favorite holiday stories and re-mix them to create something brand new. Fridays at 8 pm in December. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland Ave. bluedoortheatre.com GOOD TIMES AT GOODTYMES Mark Morris Comedy brings co-host of the Huglife podcast Mike Coletta, along with Seattle International Comedy Competition finalist Harry J. Riley. Hosted by Steve Johnson. Dec. 15, 8-9:30 pm. $5 or 2 drink min. Goodtymes Bar & Grill, 9214 E. Mission. (928-1070) SAFARI A fast-paced improvised show relying on audience suggestions to fuel each scene. Saturdays at 8 pm. $7. Blue Door Theatre, 815 W. Garland. (747-7045) FIRE BRIGADE IMPROV The theater’s in-house, family-friendly comedy troupe performs monthly. Dec. 16 at 7 pm. $5. Ignite! Community Theatre, 10814 E. Broadway Ave. igniteonbroadway.org THE SOCIAL HOUR COMEDY SHOWCASE Featuring comics from the Northwest and beyond, and hosted by Deece Casillas. Sundays, from 8-9:30 pm. Free. The Ridler Piano Bar, 718 W. Riverside Ave. socialhourpod.com (822-7938)

KEVIN BOZEMAN A semi-finalist on NBC’s “Last Comic Standing” in 2010, Kevin has also co-starred in the indie film “Flat Chested” starring Alicia Witt and Luke Perry. Dec. 20-22 at 7:30 pm, also Dec. 22 at 10 pm. $8-$22. Spokane Comedy Club, 315 W. Sprague. (318-9998)

COMMUNITY FRIENDS OF MANITO HOLIDAY LIGHTS The Gaiser Conservatory is decked out for the annual holiday lights display. Lights are on display Dec. 7-16 from noon-7:30 pm; Dec. 17-31 from noon-3:30 pm. Free, donations accepted. Manito Park, 1800 S. Grand Blvd. bit.ly/2zMVE7o (456-8038) HOLIDAY LIGHT SHOW + LAKE CRUISES Take a cruise across the lake to view more than 1.5 million twinkling holiday lights and visit Santa Claus and his elves at his waterfront toy workshop. Fortyminute cruises depart daily, through Jan. 1, at 5:30, 6:30 and 7:30 pm. Lights on display daily. $22.25/adults; $21.25/ seniors 55+; $7.50/ages 6-12; free/ages 5 and under. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. Second. cdaresort.com HOSPICE OF NORTH IDAHO: SILVER VALLEY TREE LIGHTING An evening of music and calm reflection in remembrance of those we grieve this holiday season. Each household receives a special keepsake ornament. Dec. 13, 5:30 pm. Free. Hospice of North Idaho, 2290 W. Prairie Ave. hospiceofnorthidaho.org LILAC CITY LIVE! The “late night” talk show featuring local talent at the Downtown Library, along with drinks, music and more. December’s event features local author Chris Crutcher, artist Nick Spanjer, music by Windoe and comedy by Lou Moon. Dec. 13, 7-9 pm. Free. Downtown Spokane Library, 906 W. Main Ave. spokanelibrary.org (444-5300) 350 SPOKANE’S INTERFAITH CLIMATE CHANGE COMMITTEE A committee meeting to discuss plans for action moving forward. Held in Gonzaga’s Humanities Building, located behind St. Al’s Church. Dec. 13, 6:30-8 pm. Free. Gonzaga University, 502 E. Boone. (328-4220) SANTA IS COMING TO TOWN! Visit Santa and his firefighter helpers at your neighborhood fire station. Helpers hand out candy canes and accept canned food donations. Take pictures with Santa, visit with the firefighters and tour the fire trucks. Schedule posted on the Spokane County Fire District 9 Facebook page. Dec. 13-23; times vary. Free. (466-4602) DROP IN & RPG If you’ve ever been curious about role-playing games, join us to experience this unique form of game-playing, and build a shared narrative using cooperative problem solving, exploration, imagination, and rich social interaction. Priority seating for age 17 or younger. Second and fourth Friday of the month, 4-7 pm. Free. Spark Central, 1214 W. Summit Pkwy. sparkwestcentral.org GREATER SPOKANE VALLEY: “STORIES OF GOOD WILL” Celebrate local businesses and nonprofits partnering to create a better community at the Greater Spokane Valley Chamber’s annual “Stories of Good Will” event. Dec. 14, 11 am-2 pm. $175/table. CenterPlace Regional Event Center, 2426 N. Discovery Place Dr. business.spokanevalleychamber.org HOLIDAY ON THE AVE A holiday celebration featuring carolers, Santa, hot drinks and eats and plenty of holiday cheer at district vendors. Dec. 14-15. Sprague Union District, 2400-1600 E. Sprague. bit.ly/2zVkEKt

CHRISTMAS FOR KIDS A day of Christmas activities, crafts, songs, creative learning activities, cookie decorating, and more. Ages 3-12. Pre-register online or call. Dec. 15, 10 am-noon. Free. The Vine Church, 5860 N. La Rochelle Dr. TheVineIdaho.org/events SANTA AT THE RAIL MUSEUM Kids can meet Santa, take photos and take a ride with Santa’s helper on the 2-foot train ride (weather permitting). Tour the museum, museum cars and watch the model trains. Dec. 15-16 from 11 am-4 pm. $6-$10. Inland Northwest Rail Museum, 23700 Sprinkle Rd, Reardan. inlandnwrailmuseum.com (796-3377) SANTA BREAKFAST & PHOTOS Enjoy breakfast and hot drinks with Santa and Mrs. Santa Claus. Also includes kids activities, professional photos in Santa’s sleigh with family, pets or children. Dec. 15 from 9 am-noon. $4-$10. Southside Community Center, 3151 E. 27th. sssac.org WINTER WONDERLAND ON GARLAND This family-friendly event was created to unite Garland and the community for a day filled with food, festive activities, entertainment, and more. Event contributions support Fostering WA. Dec. 15, 10:30 am-4:30 pm. Free. bit.ly/2qKg1ho ALL ABOARD THE STEAM EXPRESS The Steam Plant hosts a week of holiday events, including dining at the Kitchen + Brewery or getting photos with Santa inside the iconic Smoke Stacks. Includes a pajama drive for YWCA Spokane. Dec. 1620 from 3-6 pm. Free. The Steam Plant, 159 S. Lincoln. steamplantspokane.com CHRISTMAS CAROL SING-ALONG & ART SHOW A family friendly event with caroling, an art show, cookies and hot cocoa, storytelling and more. Dec. 19, 6:308 pm. Free. The Gathering House, 733 W. Garland. gatheringhouse.org HOLIDAY DROP & SHOP Get holiday shopping done or see a movie while the kids make holiday crafts and experiment with snowy science. Ages 3-9 pm. Space limited to 20 children. Dec. 20, 5:30-8 pm. $15/child. Mobius Children’s Museum, 808 W. Main. mobiusspokane.org THURSDAY NIGHT LIVE! The museum hosts a monthly, rotating mix of programs including music by local artists, happy hour, gallery talks, films, courses, lectures and more. Third Thursday of the month, from 6-9 pm. $5. The MAC, 2316 W. First. northwestmuseum.org

FILM NEVER-ENDING MAN: HAYAO MIYAZAKI A film following the formerly-retired Japanese film director, producer, screenwriter, animator, author, and manga artist as he returns to work to create his short film “Boro the Caterpillar” using CGI for the first time. At Regal Northtown and Riverstone (CdA). Dec. 13, 7:30 pm. $13. fathomevents.com IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE The Kenworthy’s annual showing of the 1946 classic includes free hot chocolate at each showing and a visit from Santa on Fri and Sat. Dec. 14-16 at 7 pm. $3-$7. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main. kenworthy.org MATCHSTICK PRODUCTIONS: HOJI & ALL IN Matchstick’s 2018 ski film was spearheaded by a talented group of hard-charging women who wanted to disrupt the male-dominated ski film formula. Dec. 14, 7-9:30 pm. $12. Panida Theater, 300 N. First. (208-255-7801)

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 57

W I SAW YOU

S S

CHEERS JEERS

I SAW YOU RAMEN KING OF MY HEART I saw you at King of Ramen on Thursday. We both got their new King Ramen and you completed their amazing eggs. I would love to enjoy a bowl with you again, sometime soon. MY KING From the moment we met, we have had some rare attraction. Over the years life has brought us together and pulled us apart several times. But to be here now with you today together, starting the rest of our lives together, this is my dream come true. I’m going to love you forever babe. Your Queen.

I SAW YOU J-AMAZING...! J-AMAZING... We said goodbye in Sandpoint... and I still have the shimmering stones and shell from your beautiful, loving hands... I miss you, and think of you every day, and wonder if you ever talk to me, or say the same words to the Universe, or pray that Spirit will reunite us...

My heart still dreams of growing old with you, of spending Christmas, New Year’s Eve, Valentine’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day and your birthday together... and that, just like in “Serendipity,” we’ll find each other again, same time, next year... save me a dance! Je prie pour toi, je t’aime toujours, et je rêve encore de Paris, avec toi...!

CHEERS SPOKANE COPS Cheers to the Spokane cop on Crestline and Francis 12/4 11 am who helped an old black guy with groceries coming from a food pantry. And cheers to the guy that followed us in the cop car to stop the cop and thank him for doing that for me. “Spokane Nice” is not a myth, y’all. YOU LOVE ME ANYWAY Thank you for taking care of me while I have been sick and tolerating my frantic and stresses behavior as of late. I love you. SPIRAL NOTEBOOK SAVE... ..at Fred Meyer on Thor. Many thanks to the individual who returned the blue hardcover notebook (brilliantly left in my cart) to the customer service desk on Dec 4. I have memory issues (duh) and ADHD and keep all tasks, thoughts and needed groceries inside that ‘bullet journal’ notebook. What may have looked like crazy stuff to you was/is invaluable to me. Sincere thanks again for taking the time to walk it back inside the store.

JEERS RE: GUNS VS VIOLENCE An awful lot

SOUND OFF

of law abiding gun owners unwittingly supply violent criminals with guns through lack of things like proper storage and oversight. And the whole

“

RE: CUD CHEWERS I really enjoyed the response to “cud chewers”. It was amazingly stupid & so perfect from a typical person the writer was talk-

you. Why don’t you do your employer a favor & quit. I’m sure they can find a replacement from the streets. So stupid, but not surprising. Duh!

Please come to my house to steal my packages, for I have placed my dog and/or cat poop in the package, along with my garbage, leftovers and whatever foul household waste for you to enjoy and dispose of.

“good guys with guns stop bad guys with guns” trope happens so rarely that I can safely assume the opportunity will never arise for any given individual. Even if I’m wrong and the opportunity did present itself to someone, it will be exceedingly rarer still that anything beside ducking for cover will happen. Because reality is not the movies. TO BUSINESSES THAT CAN’T GET IT RIGHT We ask a question. You give us an answer, only to find out your answer was WRONG, whether it be about a promotion, product, arrival of a person with whom we need to speak, etc. This is SO IRRITATING. All of you will NEVER have our business again! Give wrong information. Lose customers. End of story.

1. Visit Inlander.com/isawyou by 3 pm Monday. 2. Pick a category (I Saw You, You Saw Me, Cheers or Jeers). 3. Provide basic info: your name and email (so we know you’re real). 4. To connect via I Saw You, provide a non-identifying email to be included with your submission — like “petals327@yahoo.com,” not “j.smith@comcast.net.”

ing about. I totally agree with the initial comments. Customer service in Spokane is more often terrible than it is good. Regardless, the fool who commented on the response indicated that the comments about taking business elsewhere because of bad service was laughable because of low wages for those in the customer service business. I doubt the owners of the company feel that way, dumbshit! In a competitive economy, owners want good employees rather than those who drive customers away. Then again, you wouldn’t know because you’re not smart enough or ambitious enough to ever be in that position. So, go back to chewing your cud, cow! Meanwhile, the economy of Spokane will tank again because of people like you & the other cud chewers. But, go ahead & blame the customer, who doesn’t need

”

PACKAGE PORCH LOWLIFES Notice to Thieves. Please come to my house to steal my packages, for I have placed my dog and/or cat poop in the package, along with my garbage, leftovers and whatever foul household waste for you to enjoy and dispose of. To potential victims, remove labels from your amazon boxes and replace your items with anything you no longer want or need. Merry Xmas. n

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O P I U M

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E R D P O R I C O T T C H C H A E R S S O E T R H O L N O S N

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58 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

911 E Marietta Ave • Spokane WA

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NOTE: I Saw You/Cheers & Jeers is for adults 18 or older. The Inlander reserves the right to edit or reject any posting at any time at its sole discretion and assumes no responsibility for the content.

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EVENTS | CALENDAR SUMMER 1993 After her mother’s death, six-year-old Frida is sent to her uncle’s family to live with them in the countryside. But Frida finds it hard to forget her mother and adapt to her new life. In Catalan with English subtitles. Dec. 18, 7 pm. $5. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org UI CONFUCIUS INSTITUTE: CHINESE MOVIE NIGHT Each film screened for the monthly series is preceded by a brief introduction. Dec. 19, 7 pm. Free and open to the public. The Kenworthy, 508 S. Main St. kenworthy.org ELF State Farm Insurance presents a community sing-a-long and screening of the classic holiday film Elf. Dec. 20, 6:30-8:30 pm. Panida Theater, 300 N. First Ave. panida.org SUDS & CINEMA: NATIONAL LAMPOON’S CHRISTMAS VACATION The third annual holiday favorite comes to the big screen, with beer from Rainier, giveaways/prizes, free popcorn (while supplies last), an ugly sweater contest and more. Screenings at 6 and 9 pm; doors open an hour prior to each screening. Dec. 20. $5. Garland Theater, 924 W. Garland Ave. bit.ly/2E2OTSL

FOOD CHRISTMAS FOODS OF THE WORLD A multi-course dinner prepared by chefs Adam Hegsted, Ian Wingate and Rory Allen, with featured beer and spiced wine pairings. Reservations required. Dec. 13, 6 pm. $35. The Wandering Table, 1242 W. Summit Pkwy. thewanderingtable.com (443-4410) VOLUNBEER WITH GREAT NORTHERN BREWING Second Harvest partners with Great Northern Brewing to host a 2.5 hour event consisting of one part service and one part suds. Dec. 13, 5:30-8 pm. $25. Second Harvest Food Bank, 1234 E. Front Ave. secondharvestkitchen.org (252-6249) 49° NORTH ICE LOUNGE HAPPY HOUR Participants receive one free raffle ticket with every happy hour drink purchased; two winners are drawn each week, receiving a pair of 49° North lift tickets. Event for ages 21+; Sky Ribbon Cafe is open to all ages. Fridays from 5-8 pm through Feb. 22. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard St. (625-6600) ADULT CHRISTMAS COOKIE CLASS Bakers teach how to make Lilac City’s soft sugar cookie, snickerdoodle, and molasses crinkle cookies. Guests also nibble on snacks, bake cookies, and learn basic decorating skills. Dec. 14, 6 pm. $50. Lilac City Bakery, 1215 N. Ruby St. bit.ly/2K5GFKp (509-315-4958) CREATOR IN RESIDENCE: CATEE NG Catee is a self-taught baker and decorator, and now teaches classes at local libraries and other venues. Each week during her residency, she’ll be completing a new project. See her working on Dec. 18 from 4-6 pm; Fridays in Dec. from 1-3 pm and Dec. 27 from 6-8 pm. Free. North Spokane Library, 44 E. Hawthorne Rd. scld.org WINE TASTING Taste a selection of sparkling wines from around the world. Includes cheese and crackers. Dec. 14, 3-6:30 pm. $10. Vino!, 222 S. Washington St. vinowine.com GINGERBREAD HOUSE DECORATING Ticket includes a pre-built gingerbread house, plus decorations. Register for one of eight sessions held Dec. 15 and 16, at 1, 2:30, 4 or 5:30 pm. Dec. 15. $24.50. My Fresh Basket, 1030 W. Sum-

mit Pkwy. myfreshspokane.com THE HISTORY OF YUM: GINGERBREAD Food historian Monica Stenzel teaches this class on the history and creative art of making festive gingerbread treats. Program includes cookies to decorate from Madeleine’s Café. Dec. 15, 11 am. $18-$20.The MAC, 2316 W. First. northwestmuseum.org SANTACON SPOKANE An annual pub crawl held around the world to spread Christmas cheer. Spokane’s version traverses the Garland District, starting at Beerocracy. Wear a Santa suit! Dec. 15, 6 pm. Free. Beerocracy, 911 W. Garland Ave. bit.ly/2OKnDu1 SIGNING: LINDA MILLER NICHOLSON The Seattle pasta artist and cookbook author (@saltyseattle) meets fans and signs copies of her new book, Pasta, Pretty Please. Dec. 15, 2-3:30 pm. Free. Auntie’s Bookstore, 402 W. Main. auntiesbooks.com WINE TASTING: Sample wine from Daou and Justin Wineries of Paso Robles. Includes cheese and crackers. Dec. 15, 2-4:30 pm. $15. Vino! A Wine Shop, 222 S. Washington St. vinowine.com WREATH MAKING WORKSHOP & WINE TASTING Make your own festive holiday wreath, with all supplies provided, including a complimentary wine tasting. Pre-registration required. Dec. 16, 2-4 pm. $50. Winescape Winery, 6011 E 32nd Ave. parrishandgrove.com CREATING CAKE EMBELLISHMENTS Learn how to make your own modeling chocolate and marshmallow fondant at home to create flowers and figures for your cakes and cookies. Registration required; for adults & teens. Dec. 17, 6:308 pm. Free. North Spokane Library, 44 E. Hawthorne Rd. (893-8350)

MUSIC CHRISTMAS AROUND THE GLOBE Spokane’s Singing Nuns host their annual concert, featuring a distinctive international flair. Complimentary shuttle service from URM Gate #1 on North Freya. Dec. 15 and Dec. 16 at 2 and 7 pm. $12-$15. Mt. St. Michael’s, 8500 N. St. Michaels Rd. SingingNuns.com/events FLANNELFEST DECEMBER CONCERT SERIES A celebration of local musical talent every Wednesday, from 11 am-1 pm, along with a bonus performance Dec. 15 and 18. Scheduled performers as follows: Dec. 5, SPARC Tuba Quartet; Dec. 12, harpist Jann Bisceglia Engell; Dec. 12, Tuba Christmas ensemble; Dec. 18, saxophone quartet; Dec. 19, pianist Danny Cordero. Free. Spokane Transit Plaza, 701 W. Riverside. bit.ly/2UtjRt0 GOSPEL CHRISTMAS CONCERT Bethely Entertainment Group Presents: A Gospel Christmas with Yolanda Jones and Friends. Dec. 15, 5:30-7 pm. Free. The Gathering House, 733 W. Garland Ave. gatheringhouse.org (747-2818) MARK O’CONNOR & FRIENDS: AN APPALACHIAN CHRISTMAS The performance features elegant interpretations of Christmas classics found on O’Connor’s celebrated album of the same name. Dec. 15, 7 pm. TBA. Martin Woldson Theater at The Fox, 1001 W. Sprague. foxtheaterspokane.org SPOKANE AREA YOUTH CHOIRS: WALKING IN LIGHT Join all the choirs of SAYC for the annual holiday concert, featuring the sounds of the season with new and old favorite songs, joined by members of the Spokane Symphony

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Chorale. Dec. 15, 4-5 pm. $6-$10. Westminster Congregational UCC, 411 S. Washington St. saychoirs.org SPOKANE JAZZ ORCHESTRA FEAT. JACE FOGELMAN The SJO presents its annual holiday concert, “The Sounds of Michael Buble,” featuring guest vocalist Jace Fogleman. Jace is featured for tunes from Michael Buble’s “Christmas,” as well as other holiday favorites by Stan Kenton, Harry Connick, Jr., Dean Martin, and Bing Crosby, among others. Dec. 15, 7:30 pm. $23-$28. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. bingcrosbytheater.com (227-7404) TUBACHRISTMAS Tuba and euphonium players of all ages gather around the world to perform Christmas carols; 2018 is Spokane’s 4th celebration, with 50+ performers expected. Dec. 15, 3-4:30 pm. Free. Spokane Transit Plaza, 701 W. Riverside. (979-3988) HANDEL’S MESSIAH The stunning oratorio by George Frideric Handel is performed by the Kantorei Chamber Choir and Collegium Orchestra, under the direction of Timothy Westerhaus. Dec. 16, 3-6 pm. $10-$30; free/ages 12 and under. St. John’s Cathedral, 127 E. 12th Ave. Facebook.com/SpoKantorei CLARION BRASS: THIS IS WHAT CHRISTMAS SOUNDS LIKE This year’s program includes “Winter Wonderland” in a modern mariachi style and “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” combined with a folk tune, “The Parting Glass.” Dec. 18, 7:30 pm. $18-$25. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. Also Dec. 19, 7:30 pm, at St. John’s Cathedral, 127 E. 12th Ave. figarotunes.com HOLIDAY CAROLING WITH ALL SAINTS SCHOOL Join in as music director Elizabeth Samse leads singers from All Saints Catholic School singing a selection of holiday carols. Dec. 18, 11:15 am-noon. South Hill Library, 3324 S. Perry St. spokanelibrary.org

SPORTS & OUTDOORS THURSDAY THEME NIGHT Come dressed to impress in themed attire for a $1 discount off admission; includes food specials, music and more. Thursdays, 5-9 pm through Feb. 28. See link for details. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard. my.spokanecity.org/riverfrontpark EAGLE WATCHING CRUISES Every year, 100s of American Bald Eagles visit Lake Coeur d’Alene on their annual migration. For an up-close look, take a cruise to Wolf Lodge Bay. Offered Dec. 15-16 from 1-3 pm; Dec. 26-Jan. 1 from 10 am-noon and 1-3 pm. $18.25-$26.26. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. Second. bit.ly/2IzdDlD (208-765-4000) FREE ICE SKATING LESSONS Join experienced instructors for ice skating lessons every Saturday and Sunday from 11:30 am-1:30 pm. Ages 5+. Riverfront Park, 705 N. Howard. (625-6600) LILAC CITY FIGURE SKATING CHRISTMAS POPS Members of the club perform for the annual Christmas show. Admission is a suggested donation of a toy or cash for Toys For Tots. Dec. 15, 12-2:30 pm. Eagles Ice-A-Rena, 6321 N. Addison St. (509-220-5780) SPOKANE CHIEFS VS. SEATTLE THUNDERBIRDS: Promo: Toys for Tots ugly holiday sweater night Dec. 16, 5:05 pm. $11-$25. Spokane Arena, 720 W. Mallon. spokanearena.com (279-7000)

Advice Goddess THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE LADLE

I’m a 57-year-old twice-divorced man. Though I never wanted to get to a point where romance wouldn’t be in my big picture, I’m feeling done with it. I’ve replaced dating and getting married again with gourmet cooking for one. I’m really enjoying it, but it worries me. Is it okay to be done? —Single And Culinary Well, according to some research, married people do live longer. However, that’s sometimes just because they were unsuccessful at killing each other. There’s this notion that your life is pretty much a black chasm of nothingness if you’re without a “significant other.” Psychologist Bella DePaulo blames this thinking on what she calls “the cult of the couple.” DePaulo, who researches the elements of being satisfyingly single, marvels at “the strange implication” (in a paper by noted marriage researchers) “that people without a stable sexual relationship are wandering adrift with open wounds and shivering in their sleep.” Though we humans evolved to be interdependent — people who need people — we don’t have to be sleeping with those people on the reg for them to count. In fact, having good friends and close acquaintances you can rely on is associated with a whole bunch of physical and mental health benefits, including better cardiovascular health, increased happiness, and decreased stress and depression. Interestingly, research increasingly suggests that providing social support may be even better for you than getting it — psychologically and physically. A study coauthored by psychiatrist Randolph Nesse on elderly people who regularly did generous acts for others in their lives is one of a number that find an association between being a “giver” and increased life expectancy. Conversely, Nesse theorizes that the rising tide of depression in our society has roots in how disconnected many of us are, leading to a deficit in the level of kindness we evolved to give and receive. Well, you’re set up perfectly to extend yourself for others — like by handing them a plate of your gourmet chow. Consider using your newfound love of cooking to bring a social circle together around your dining room table. Invite friends over every Friday or so to dine or even help you make dinner. The cool thing is, before they arrive, nothing’s stopping you from whispering the same seductive thing you would to a woman: “So...what are you wearing?” The turkey: “The same little paper socks you put on me an hour ago, stupid.”

AMY ALKON

FROM ADHERE TO ETERNITY

I’m a 42-year-old woman, and I’ve been dating the guy in the town house next door for two years. I love him, and I’d like to get married, but he has always taken me for granted. My friends say I’m too available. Yes, I’m always there for him, always picking up the phone or texting back right away, etc. Why is this a bad thing? I’m loyal and caring. Also, I’m not sure how I could be less “available” when he lives next door. —Undervalued Being neighbors is so convenient: “Hi...could I just borrow your stepladder until tomorrow and your vagina for, like, an hour?” Unfortunately, being ready, willing, available and conveniently located is not exactly the launchpad to romantic longing. Consider that the restaurant everybody wants to go to is the one where getting a table requires Hollywood connections plus selling two-thirds of your soul to bribe the maitre d’. The food there might not be substantially better than that of the bistro up the street. But exclusivity — how tough it is to book a table — elevates the apparent value of a place. There’s a related concept in relationships, “the principle of least interest.” The term was coined in the 1930s by a sociologist, Willard Waller, and it describes how the person who has the least interest in continuing a relationship has the most power over it. (Modern research by sociologist Susan Sprecher supports Waller’s theory.) Sadly, your boyfriend most likely has a set opinion of your value, so your chances of getting more appreciation from him are probably blown. Still, it’s important to note that in a relationship, you don’t have to keep up the “least interest” gambit forever; you should just hold off on being full-on loyal and caring till you have somebody who’s inspired to do that for you, too. Ultimately, it’s important to work on yourself so you’ll be “hard to get.” But before you get to that point, you can act “as if” -- like by setting an alarm for four hours and returning texts then instead of 8.6 seconds after they hit your phone. It’s sure to be seriously difficult at first. But you could probably get into a balanced, loving relationship if you’d just adhere to “the principle of least interest”: We pine for what’s slightly out of reach, not what’s all over us like an oil spill. n ©2018, Amy Alkon, all rights reserved. • Got a problem? Write Amy Alkon, 171 Pier Ave, #280, Santa Monica, CA 90405 or email AdviceAmy@aol.com (www.advicegoddess.com)

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 59

Reefer Madness and things like it helped to perpetuate myths about pot.

RESEARCH

Busted! Taking on myths about marijuana BY MITCH RYALS

s a shaggy-haired kid sitting in a circle with friends, the wild assertions abounded about the herb people were inhaling. The one that stuck with me most was that smoking marijuana would lead to ball cancer. As in testicular cancer. That was around 2009, when a Seattle-based study linking “soaring marijuana use” and increased incidences of a particular type of testicular cancer was published. Researchers cautioned that the link was only a “hypothesis” and needed further exploration. A more recent review of studies from the 1990s found that “those using cannabis on at least a weekly

60 INLANDER DECEMBER 13, 2018

basis had two-and-a-half times greater odds” of developing that particular type of testicular cancer. Still, for as long as people have smoked it, myths about marijuana have stuck around. Here are a few more we’ve found to be not so credible.

MYTH: FOUR-TWENTY IS COP CODE FOR POT

It’s totally believable that punky stoner kids who overhear the fuzz mumble “four-twenty” in a radio whilst also grinding the joint they just confiscated under their boot heel would reclaim the phrase. But the actual origin of the official stoner holiday (April 20) is more unlikely. It’s not Bob Marley’s birthday (but it is Hitler’s birthday), it’s not the number of chemical compounds in marijuana and it’s not the sum of the numbers in that one Bob Dylan song multiplied. In fact, the official origin, identified just last year in the Oxford English Dictionary, is a group of bell-bottomed stoner kids in San Rafael, California. The group would pass each other in the hallway and whisper “4:20” to each other as reminders to meet up after school and spark a doobie.

MYTH: WEED IS NOT ADDICTIVE

Earlier this year, the Atlantic published a groundbreaking story challenging the notion that weed is not addictive. Smokers and former smokers describe debilitating effects and an inability to quit.

“If not necessarily because of legalization, but alongside legalization, such problems are becoming more common,” the author, Annie Lowrey, writes. She cites the National Institutes of Health, which report that the share of adults with marijuana-use disorder has doubled since the early aughts.

MYTH: MARIJUANA CAUSES MAN BOOBS

First of all, what the hell, CNN? In 2013 the network published a convoluted article article by Detroit-based plastic surgeon Anthony Youn, citing a report from 1972, which “made the initial connection between cannabis and gynecomastia,” the medical term for man boobs. Or moobs, if you will. Youn acknowledges that “few studies have examined a direct causative effect” between smoking pot and moobs, and cites another study from 1977, which showed no association. “So can smoking pot really give you man boobs?” Youn asks. “Probably.” That’s quite a leap. Luckily, other outlets rushed to debunk the good doctor’s claim, citing research showing “no scientific evidence” that smoking weed will give you man boobs. n A version of this article first appeared in the Inlander’s glossy cannabis quarterly, GZQ.

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A CHARLIE BROWN CHRISTMAS The classic animated special comes to life in this stage adaptation. Through Dec. 15; Thu-Sat at 7 pm; Sat at 2 pm. Liberty Lake Community Theatre, 22910 E. Appleway. libertylaketheatre.com A CHRISTMAS WITH C.S. LEWIS The year is 1962 and the famous British author has agreed to talk to a group of writers visiting England over the Christmas season. Dec. 13, 7-9 pm. $15-$45. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague Ave. bingcrosbytheater.com ELF THE MUSICAL Based on the cherished 2003 film comes this staged version of the story of Buddy the elf. Through Dec. 23; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $15-$32. Spokane Civic Theatre, 1020 N. Howard. (325-2507) ELLEN TRAVOLTA PRESENTS: CHRISTMAS UNWRAPPED This year’s show, directed by Troy Nickerson, features the talents of Ellen and Margaret Travolta, Molly Allen, Mark Cotter, Abbey Crawford, Patrick Treadway, Laura Sable and Lola Fridley. Through Dec. 16, Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 5 pm. $27.50. The Coeur d’Alene Resort, 115 S. Second. cdaresort.com LONG CHRISTMAS RIDE HOME Follow a dysfunctional family during the Christmas holiday in this production that employs puppets. Dec. 13-23; Thu-Sat at 7:30 pm, Sun at 2 pm. $20. Stage Left Theater, 108 W. Third. spokanestageleft.org WAITRESS Inspired by Adrienne Shelly’s beloved film, “Waitress” tells the story of a waitress and expert pie maker who dreams of a way out of her small town and loveless marriage. Dec. 12-15 at 7:30 pm, Dec. 15 at 2 pm and Dec. 16 at 1 and 6:30 pm. $50-$98. First Interstate Center for the Arts, 334 W. Spokane Falls Blvd. wcebroadway.com A CHRISTMAS CAROL Scrooge is still obnoxious, but now is a modern businesswoman in this production. Dec. 14-15 at 7 pm, Dec. 16 at 3 pm. $7-$12. Pend Oreille Playhouse, 236 S. Union Ave. pendoreilleplayers.org A CHRISTMAS PUDDING A compilation of well known stories, Christmas carols, and a few unknown or lesserknown pieces woven together. Dec. 1415 at 7:30 pm, Dec. 16 at 2 pm. Ignite! Community Theatre, 10814 E. Broadway Ave. igniteonbroadway.org HARRY CONNICK, JR.’S THE HAPPY ELF A new musical comedy by the Grammy-winning and Tony-nominated composer and lyricist. Nov. 23-Dec. 16; Fri at 7 pm; Sat-Sun at 2 pm (Nov. 23 at 4 pm). $10-$14. Spokane Children’s Theatre, 2727 N. Madelia. spokanechildrenstheatre.org IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE A musical adaptation of Frank Capra’s masterpiece. Dec. 14-16 and 20-23. Pullman Civic Theatre, 1220 NW Nye. (332-8406) IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE: A RADIO PLAY A show based on the classic holiday movie, staged as a live radio broadcast. Through Dec. 16; Fri-Sat at 7 pm, Sun at 2 pm. Dinner theater Dec. 15 at 6 pm (reservations only). $5-$30. StageWest Community Theatre, 639 Elm St., Cheney. (309-9929) TRADITIONS OF CHRISTMAS The Radio City Music Hall-style show includes choreographed tap numbers, Santa’s workshop, a heartfelt military tribute and a grand Nativity. Through Dec.

21; Fri-Sun (times vary). $21-$34. Kroc Center, 1765 W. Golf Course Rd. traditionsofchristmasnw.com STAGE TO SCREEN: THE MADNESS OF GEORGE III Written by one of Britain’s best-loved playwrights Alan Bennett, this epic play was also adapted into a BAFTA Award-winning film following its premiere on stage in 1991. Dec. 16, 2-4 pm. $4-$10. Bing Crosby Theater, 901 W. Sprague. (227-7404) IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE: A RADIO PLAY Based on the classic film, staged as a live radio broadcast. Through Dec. 19; Tue-Wed at 7:30 pm. $15-$20. Best Western Coeur d’Alene, 506 W. Appleway. artsandculturecda.org

ARTS IL•LU•MI•NA•TION An exhibition inviting the viewer to step into a highly immersive site-specific installation. Created by Shantell Jackson, Roin Morigeau, and Asia Porter. Through Dec. 29; Thu-Sat from 6-8 pm. Free. Terrain, 304 W. Pacific. bit.ly/2L7k5BP ORNAMENTS & SMALL WORKS SHOW The annual showcase features ornaments and other small works made by more than 40 regional artists. Through Dec. 21; Mon-Fri 10 am-5 pm, Sat 10 am-4 pm. Free. Spokane Art School, 811 W. Garland. (325-1500.) SARANAC SMALL WORKS SALE The annual show features small, affordable, original works of art by Saranac members and invited guests. Through Dec. 22; Thu 2-6 pm and Fri-Sat 12-8 pm. Saranac Art Projects, 25 W. Main Ave. saranacartprojects.org SECOND FRIDAY ARTWALK Coeur d’Alene’s monthly celebration of local art, with galleries hosting artist receptions, live music and more. Dec. 14, 5-8 pm. Free. artsandculturecda.org HOLIDAY GIFT SHOW An arts reception offering hot beverages and treats to shoppers looking for a unique gift from the gallery’s members and guest artists. Dec. 15, 11 am-5 pm. Free. New Moon Art Gallery, 1326 E. Sprague, Suite B. newmoonartgallery.com TERRAIN’S WINTER BRRRZAAR A juried winter artisan market featuring 70+ local artists and makers. Includes live music, a bar and family activities. Dec. 15, 11 am-10 pm. River Park Square, 808 W. Main. bit.ly/BrrrZAAR2018 ART AMONG THE TREES The event features 25 trees festively decorated by community members, the music of John Elwood and Sally Burkhart, complimentary refreshments, beer and wine and of course, stunning artwork. Dec. 19, 5-8 pm. Free. Colfax Library, 102 S. Main St. whitco.lib.wa.us

WORDS FICTION & POETRY WORKSHOPS & READING Lost Horse Press and the Sandpoint Literary Collective present the first event in the Winter Creative Writing Series with Bruce Holbert and Jackson Holbert. Dec. 15, 1-6 pm. Free and open to the public. Sandpoint Library, 1407 Cedar St. (208-255-4410) DROP IN & WRITE Bring works in progress to share, get inspired with creative prompts and spend focused time writing. Tuesdays, 5-6:30 pm. Free. Spark Central, 1214 W. Summit Pkwy. spark-central.org (279-0299) n

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he holidays are a busy time, what with winter weather, extra guests and a thousand things on your to-do list. Remember to carve out time for the people you care about most, including yourself. INDULGE YOUR INNER CHILD. Let Coeur d’Alene’s festive spirit revive your inner sense of wonder along Sherman Avenue, all dressed for the holidays. Pop into shops like FIGPICKEL’S TOY EMPORIUM or MRS. HONEYPEEPS SWEET SHOP, for a mixture of classics and contemporary treats, both located in the Resort Plaza Shops. Speaking of treats, ABI’S ICE CREAM serves up decadence in a mug with their amazing salted caramel ice cream latte. GO WALKING IN A WINTER WONDERLAND. Take that latte or indulge in some hot chocolate and give yourself a self-guided tour of

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R PRIC E $5 02

38 4 Sa uests Per Day ve 2 3% ) (S ales tax no t included) Scar ywood, Season pass but season es ar e not valid fo pass hold of fers for Sc er s will receive specia r ar ywood. l ticket $

Christmas Sale Ends Dec. 31st

order your passes today

silverwoodthemepark.com

gallery hop. Art Spirit Gallery is featuring its annual small artworks show, featuring smaller-scale pieces with smaller-scale prices — perfect for gift giving. Free; 5-8 pm; go to visitcda.org for an event map.

Emerge Holiday Market DECEMBER 15-16

Find truly one of a kind Christmas gifts and support local artisans when you shop at Emerge’s Holiday Market. Browse affordable original art, prints, and more. Coffee Roboto will also be on hand serving up holiday cheer. Emerge Gallery; noon-4 pm.

Sunday Brunch with Santa DECEMBER 16 & 23

Your kids can whisper their wishes in Santa’s ear and enjoy the Coeur d’Alene Resort’s legendary brunch this Sunday. $18-34; Dockside Restaurant; 9 am-noon; 208-666-5799.

Coeur d’Alene Downtown Association

For more events, things to do & places to stay, go to VisitCDA.org

COEUR D’ALENE

SPONSORED BY THE COEUR D’ALENE CONVENTION & VISITORS BUREAU

DECEMBER 13, 2018 INLANDER 67

sil

SPA

Special

12 Days of Christmas ALL MONTH LONG! With any 60-minute service, get one FREE Spa Ssakwa’q’n Music CD and one 8 oz. Season’s Signature product!

Plus, receive a Holiday Bonus! Those that experience a 60-minute service in December will also receive a certificate valid for $10 OFF any 60-minute service received in January or February.

Open 7 days a week | Call 1 855 232-2772 to book Season’s Signature 8 oz. items include hairspray, conditioner, deodorant or massage oil. Limit 2 complimentary gifts and one Holiday Bonus certificate per 60-minute service. Multiple offer redemptions allowed. Valid while supplies last. Valid now through December 31st, 2018.

PRO SHOP

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The Circling Raven Pro Shop Annual Holiday Sale includes FREE gift wrapping! Logo and name-brand attire, gifts and golf gear for men and women. Gift cards available. Shop with your Coeur Rewards points!

Call 1 800 523-2464 for details.

1 800 523-2464 | CDACASINO.COM |    Worley, Idaho | 25 miles south of Coeur d’Alene

68 INLANDER AUGUST 24, 2017

F or de ta i l s : CDA na s h v i l l e s e s s ion s .c om