From My Farmhouse Kitchen

I admire people who are true conversationalists. Oh, many of us know how to open our mouths and have noise come out. Some of us (me for sure) are great babblers.

Conversation must be an art. For a few, the gift of gab comes naturally. But most painters, talented pianists and star athletes will tell you it takes hours of practice every day.

Because of the isolation we have been subjected to, my conversing skills have certainly not been developing. In fact, when I get with people I tend to overtalk; or misspeak so often that I grimace with shame when my mind recalls my monologue at night. At a church we once attended, there was a cry room where mothers with young children could go to when they misbehaved. For many of us mothers, this was the first adult conversations we had experienced since last Sunday (husFROM MY FARMHOUSE KITCHEN bands must not count, I guess). At times it did get out of hand with too much conversing. It was the mothers who were actually misbehaving. We should have By Renae B. reserved our conversations for later. Vander Schaaf Family gatherings are more of the right place for discourse. I remember days of old, when my dear uncles and aunts always made sure everyone knew their presence was greatly appreciated and they sure possessed the knack for chatting. It is easy for me to just sit in a corner quietly and be an observer because watching other people interact is enjoyable. There are some who might come to the conclusion that I am snooty, or don’t care about anyone else and am just plain stupid. Now the last one is probably true, and for a long time it has been easier to keep my mouth shut so more people don’t come to that conclusion. But it’s time for me to get over that shyness and learn to converse intelligently. And try not to put my foot in my mouth over and over again. For instance, never ask a woman when her baby is due. Obviously the first step is to learn to make small talk. It does have a purpose in helping to put everyone at ease. Since my brain often goes dead once the weather has been discussed, my next comment usually is, “it’s been nice talking to you.” Later on I will think, “why didn’t I ask about this or that?” Quite frankly, I truly enjoy hearing what is going on in other people’s lives. Mine is already known to me. After all, do you really want to hear about my battle with desk clutter? But then again, perhaps you have some great organization ideas.

Really, if a trip has been taken, please tell me about it. I want to hear about the unique, off-thebeaten-path destination you discovered that is worth visiting. I am not a traveler, so your vacations do interest me.

Eating is something I definitely find pleasing (besides necessary). So please tell me the newest cooking secret you have learned; a recipe that makes any meal a five star winner; or a new appliance my kitchen must have.

You may tell me your political views, but prepared to listen to mine. After all, part of a being a good conversationalist is listening. A good conversation is one with dialogue.

But above all, keep your speech positive. Malicious gossiping or tearing down others is not appreciated. If anyone has offended you, get on your knees and pray for them and yourself. By the same token, immoral talk is never acceptable in any conversation. It reveals something about the speaker’s heart that needs a transformation. Barnyard expletives blurted in haste because of extreme frustration while working stay in the barnyard — right?

We really do need to be careful of the words we speak, because words carry plenty of weight and do affect others. Words once spoken are seldom forgotten. It’s so important to remember that our words have power. They can inspire or destroy.

“Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.” — Colossians 4:6 (King James version)

And another reminder found in Philippians 1:27: “Only let your conversation be as it becometh the gospel of Christ: that whether I come and see you, or else be absent, I may hear of your affairs, that ye stand fast in one spirit, with one mind striving together for the faith of the gospel.”

Renae B. Vander Schaaf is an independent writer, author and speaker. Contact her at (605) 530-0017 or agripen@live.com. v

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Beef producer survey deadline extended

The University of Minnesota and Minnesota Beef Council are collaborating on an overview study mapping the pathways Minnesota beef cattle travel from birth to finish. The survey was opened last fall, and the deadline has been extended to March 31.

The study will provide a foundational overview by documenting and describing the farm-to-feedlot pathways currently being utilized by Minnesota beef producers. The survey is available online and should take producers approximately 5-10 minutes to finish. Survey results and responses are completely voluntary and confidential.

The survey is available at z.umn.edu/beefpathways.

This article was submitted by University of Minnesota. v