Metro Spirit 04.05.2012 by Metro Spirit

CONTENTS COVER DESIGN | KRUHU Want to advertise in the Metro Spirit? 706.496.2535 or 706.373.3636 Metro Spirit is a free newspaper published weekly on Thursday, 52 weeks a year. Editorial coverage includes local issues and news, arts, entertainment, people, places and events. In our paper appear views from across the political and social spectrum. The views do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. Visit us at metrospirit.com.© 15 House, LLC. Owner/Publisher: Joe White. Legal: Phillip Scott Hibbard. Reproduction or use without permission is prohibited. One copy per person, please.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Insider is an anonymous, opinion-based examination of the hidden details of Augusta politics and personalities.

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Sanders Answers the Big Question We asked Freddie Sanders after his formal announcement Monday to clear up some things. Metro Spirit: Widely circulated rumor is that you’ll drop out. Freddie Sanders: Absolutely not. If Scott Peebles is a candidate in the primary, I’m gonna run as hard against him as I’d run against anyone else. I couldn’t do that to the people that are supporting me. I would be lying to them, and I’m not going to do that. That was one of the things Sylvia Cooper asked me, and other people have asked me, and I would be lying to the people, and I wouldn’t do that. I would not do that. If Sheriff Strength was to change his mind and say I’m going to run again, I would drop out in a heartbeat MS: What do you say to all the rumors about you getting in to burnish your Republican bonafides? FS: What happened was, and he’s a friend of mine, Austin Rhodes… I talk to him when he wants to talk to me, but he is in Scott’s corner and he believes, he always looks at strategy and planning and, to tell you the truth, I’m not that devious and he believes that’s what has happened. And I told him that. I will not get out. I will not get out if Scott wins, it Ronnie wins… MS: Were you waiting on Sheriff Strength to retire so you could run? FS: That is a good question. I guess subconsciously I was waiting. Because I missed it. I don’t go 10 minutes a day without thinking about that sheriff’s department. It’s almost like being a military brat. I’m a sheriff’s department brat, I just love it that much. I did not want this opportunity to go by. But that is a good question. As long as Sheriff Webster was the sheriff, and his heir [Sheriff Strength] was in the position, I would never have run. But now he’s been the sheriff and he’s had a great career and I feel like if I don’t take this opportunity I will regret it. And I will tell you who calls me every day cussin’ me out… Sheriff Strength… jokingly.

Everyone is heading to the NEW

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Southside Mafia Still Strong? Word has it that Freddie Sanders entering the race hurts Robbie Silas much more than Scott Pebbles. All that Peebles can hope for at this point is a strong second place in the primary and head into the runoff with Richard Roundtree. By the general election in November many think Sanders will have faded, and if Pebbles is still standing he will win. Former Mayor Larry Sconyers throwing his support to Sanders is a blow to Silas; however, it remains to be seen how strong Southside Mafia is today. There is a clear, very loud, very open ABR (Anyone but Roundtree) initiative in Augusta political and business circles, so look for the fan to be covered soon. Will the attacks on Rountree help or hurt him? Will the age of both Peebles and Sanders be viewed favorably or negatively? Will John Ivey receive more votes than his current T-Mobile Friends and Family plan? Remains to be seen. But we in media are happy. The Parking Deck/Magnolia Trace/Fred Russell chapter is finally coming to an end. It’s going to be fun to have new arguments and controversies to dissect.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

JENNY IS WRIGHT 15 in 5 - Masters 2012 Edition

Because I love a list. Especially a random(ish) list. 1. Three cheers for plenty of free parking. It seems strange to have huge grassy fields of nothingness for the other 51 weeks of the year, but it’s worth it for all the additional spaces. I hope they don’t ever pave it. 2. Sorry about the azaleas, people. They were gorgeous a week ago. At least the pollen is better than it usually is, and the grass is absolute perfection. 3. What’s up with the rock star looking golfers? Spiky long hair and hats on backwards? I’m not saying we need to go back to plus-fours, argyle socks and tam o’shanters (wouldn’t that be cool, though?) but yuck. 4. Despite my suggestions, there were plenty of you fools out there in jeans. First of all, it was 90 degrees on Monday. That isn’t jeans weather. Secondly, you’re going to one of the most exclusive events in all of sports, the trip of a lifetime, and the best things you can dig out of your suitcase are your circa 1980s faded jeans and a fraternity T-shirt? 5. Also, you, lady with the teensy black tank top. Although I’m sure the men appreciated the view of your, ahem, upper region, the shorts were pushing it. I shouldn’t be able to tell that your upper thighs have more dimples than a Titleist Pro V1. I shouldn’t be able to see your upper thighs period. Like, as a general rule. 6. I figured out why some people wear golf shoes out there (besides the players, of course). Supposedly, they’re a lot easier to clean than expensive running shoes. The spikes add traction after a big rain. It’s apparently acceptable to own and wear golf shoes even if you don’t play. Don’t tell, but I’m thinking about trying some on. 7. I’m glad to see they fixed the sign with the grammar mistake. “Quite please” sounds so dainty and all, but it doesn’t make sense. What it did do was show that they aren’t perfect. Pretty close, though. 8. As if it was possible, the egg salad out there is somehow better this year. On Monday alone, I ate three and brought two more home. 9. I’m curious as to why they took away the chicken filet sandwich and replaced it

with a grilled chicken wrap. There’s nothing wrong with healthy options, but why can’t there be room for both? 10. Beer sales used to stop at 4 p.m. Some genius (my hero) decided to extend sales until 5 p.m. No more grabbing as many beers as you can carry at 3:59. Now we do it at 4:59. 11. There’s nothing better than getting to send someone out there for the first time. Even people who haven’t ever watched a second of golf can’t help but be mesmerized by the vast, crisp fairways and luxurious green grass. When I went for the first time in 1997, I got it right away. Cheap beer didn’t hurt the cause. 12. I haven’t missed one since, and I feel kinda spoiled by it all. 13. Remember when The Partridge Inn was the place to be Masters Week? The porches would be overflowing and parking was at a premium. Then they decided to charge a cover and jack up their prices for canned beers. 14. If you haven’t done it already, go download the Masters app. They have it for both main kinds of smart phones. It’s free, and it’s the prettiest and most useful app out there. You get bonus coverage each day. Go to the player bios and then turn your phone sideways. It becomes the player’s scorecard. Magical! 15. This is one of those tricky years when Easter and Masters Sunday are the very same day. We have plans to eat deviled eggs and ham biscuits, sipping mimosas and spending time with family. We’ll be outside, enjoying the perfect Augusta spring weather. We’ll all be on the deck, gathered around the TV, watching coverage of what is arguably one of the best days in all of sports. Happy Easter and Passover, joyous Masters and cheers, y’all!

JENNYWRIGHT lives in Summerville with her husband, who she calls The Man, and two kids, who she affectionately calls The Boy and The Girl. She enjoys taking photos, cooking and playing tennis.

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AUGUSTA TEK

Top 10 in Georgia Technology

Last week, the Augusta Chapter of the Technology Association of Georgia (TAG) participated in its annual Georgia Technology Summit. The theme of this year’s event was “Innovation: Path to a Bright Future” and highlighted several areas of Georgia’s technology industry. The Top 10 Innovative Companies in Georgia were featured. These companies were selected due to their degree of innovation, the scope and financial impact of their innovations and effect of innovation in promoting Georgia’s technology industry throughout the U.S. and globally. The 2012 Top 10 Innovative Companies include the following: AirWatch — Enterprise-grade mobile device management, mobile application management and mobile content management solutions. Brightwhistle — Digital patient acquisition solution provider for hospitals and large physician practices. First Data — Electronic commerce and payment processing. Innovolt — Comprehensive electronics power protection and management, protecting equipment from common power grid disturbances. NexTraq — GPS fleet tracking and vehicle management solutions. Podponics — Converting used shipping containers into modular controlledenvironment growth pods to enable the growth of fresh produce in urban centers. Proximus Mobility — Location-based, proximity marketing that delivers relevant content to consumers’ mobile devices at the point of purchase, regardless of phone type and without an app. Red Bag Solutions — A company that offers patented technology and equipment for the on-site processing of regulated medical waste. SalesLoft — Automates sales research and new leads generated through data analytics for business-to-business organizations. Velocity Medical Solutions — The next generation of intelligent radiation treatment tools, providing clinicians a fully integrated record of all diagnostic, planning and delivery data. The event also featured Farhad Manjoo, columnist at Slate and Fast Company, speaking on the looming tech battle between Apple, Facebook, Google and Amazon (good stuff — see more at bit.ly/Hj0Nzy), and John Hinshaw, executive VP of global technology and business processes at HP, speaking on the transformation currently underway at HP. In my opinion, Duncan Angove, president of Infor, delivered the most powerful talk when describing the changes made at Infor over the past year. Infor is the No. 3 provider of enterprise software (behind Oracle and SAP). His leadership team has recognized a few trends in the software market, namely industry specialization and the consumerization of enterprise software. In response, they have created a start-up culture within their organization to deliver innovative solutions that will allow Infor to surpass the market leaders. At least, they hope so. Enjoy the tournament! Until next time, I’ll see you on the internet @gregory_a_baker.

GREGORY A. BAKER, PH.D, is vice president and chief rocket scientist for CMA, which provides information technology services to CSRA businesses and nonprofits.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

AUSTIN RHODES None of Them Have a Clue

Strong supporters of this country’s Second Amendment right to possess a personal firearm should want to punch George Zimmerman right in the mouth. Of course, you would risk getting shot if you tried that, but on with my point. I have no idea what exactly happened between Zimmerman and the late Trayvon Martin on the night of February 26 in Sanford, Florida. I am bright enough to admit my ignorance on the subject to one and all and, in doing so, solemnly promise not to speak or write authoritatively on exactly what went down and how Martin ended up dead. I was not there and, because there are so many contradictions flying concerning the specifics, it is far wiser just to shut up and stop jumping to ridiculous conclusions due to a lack of accurate information. Oh, that the race-baiting blowhards who are Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton could do the same. While it certainly appears that the case has been mishandled, there has been so much utter bullshizzle put out on both sides of the debate that rational conversation concerning the details of Martin’s shooting at the hands of Zimmerman is virtually impossible. The press has reported, and the race baiters have spewed, about 10 different versions of each significant detail of the case, even to the extent of the weight and height of both of the men. Such a reasonable pause in the histrionic rhetoric (brought to you in part by friendly reminders from the Duke Lacrosse Team and the late Emmitt Till) does not mean there are not lessons to be gleaned from what we do know for a fact occurred when these two men met. Let me share some of the lessons that jumped out at me: 1. Unless someone is threatening immediate violence, only a schmuck responds to peaceful, inquisitive conversation by “bowing up.” What kind of paranoid, steroid head is ready to “throw down” over the simple question, “Hey man... are you lost... can I help you in this neighborhood?” 2. If you ever... ever... decide to pull a loaded firearm out on another person, know in your own heart and mind that you have really already decided to kill them. A gun is not a show toy, and it does not prove you are any better, smarter or cooler than anyone else. It should state simply and purely that you have decided the person

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

AUSTINRHODES

The views expressed are the opinions of Austin Rhodes and do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher.

in front of you is in the midst of committing a felony, and you have decided to kill them in order to save life or property. 3. If you think you may be doing something that looks or sounds suspicious, do not act like a weenie when you see others responding to that suspicious behavior. That means if you are a male over the age of about 12, and you are ever anywhere alone with an unknown female (such as an elevator, a dark parking lot, a lonesome jogging trail, etc.) you are automatically suspect. Red or yellow, black or white, morning or afternoon, day or night, it makes no difference. If you have a ding-dong, you are going to be perceived as a potential threat by 98 percent of the female population. As the father of a 21-year-old daughter, the husband of a beautiful wife, and the son of an aging mother, I validate that concern, and approve of their suspicious nature. Men are also going to be suspicious of other men, but usually only under the proper conditions: Late at night, cruising through bad neighborhoods and, of course, in the occasional prison shower. 4. A 911 operator is never, ever, ever going to urge a caller to “jump in there and get him” as the they are describing either a suspicious individual, a burglar in the act or even a maniac in the midst of murder. Don’t ever automatically attack the motives of an apparent Good Samaritan when they proceed to directly defy the instructions of the police dispatcher. Those folks have to tell you to step back; it is in their rulebook. If you see a real felony being committed and lives are at stake, the law is clear: You may intervene and, if need be, use deadly force to bring said felon to a screeching halt. ‘Nuff said. I have no idea if George Zimmerman was acting within the law when he shot Trayvon Martin, but having had several arguments that escalated into a butt whoopin’ for me as a young man, I can say there was never a time when pulling a gun would have been necessary or appropriate in my situation. Zimmerman’s actions that night further put my right to carry a firearm at risk, and I really do not appreciate that. The bad guys decided a long, long time ago that they were not going to obey any rule that stands in the way of doing what they want. If you think you have seen enough innocent blood shed up to this point, wait until the wolves have been told that the sheep no longer have guns.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Go Dogs!

Augusta Rugby Club heads to playoffs in Arkansas As one of golf’s most illustrious events comes to a close and visitors from around the world leave Augusta, members who play an altogether different sport prepare to leave the Garden City as well, bound for Little Rock, Arkansas. But instead of winding down, the Augusta Mad Dogs rugby team is gearing up for a playoff game that could lead them to the eastern finals in Pennsylvania and, maybe, the national championships in Colorado in May. A 29-27 home field win over Baton Rouge on March 24 in the first round of the playoffs means the Mad Dogs are off to play Little Rock on April 14. Not bad for an amateur team whose members include an electrician and a Catholic school principal, and Mad Dogs Coach Pete Redmond (pictured below) said the feat is even more impressive considering where the team was merely a year and a half ago. “Eighteen months ago we were losing by 50 points to division 3 teams,” Redmond said. “We lost to Hilton Head by 60 points, I think, and they’re division 3 and we’re division 2. We were just getting humiliated.” That humiliation led to a dramatic shift. “The team had to decide whether we wanted to be a social team or a real rugby team and they decided they wanted to be a real rugby team,” Redmond explained. “We recruited some guys who are really good athletes and had some veterans rededicate themselves to the team. The guys have established a culture of hard work that has translated into winning.” It may have translated into winning, but Redmond said that one thing it hasn’t translated into is attention. So while Little Rock may have the home field advantage, the mystery surrounding the Mad Dogs may just give them an edge. “Little Rock? They’re pretty good. They’ve made the playoffs before, but we’ve gotten no press,” Redmond said. “The U.S. rugby magazine has mentioned us once and all the teams they say are powerhouses we’ve beaten, so we’re coming into this as an underdog but I like our chances. We like being unrecognized. That gives us an advantage. That means they underestimate us.”

AMYCHRISTIAN

METRO

NEWS

All this talk of national championships, magazines and hard work may surprise those with only a passing familiarity with the game, which is often waved away as a pseudo-sport played by hard-drinking meatheads with anger-management issues. “You do go out and beat the stink out of each other, but it’s more than that,” Redmond admitted. “In rugby, you have nothing to hide behind. There are no pads and no helmets, so there’s lots of technique involved. In fact, one thing we have to do when we get football players is unteach them how to play football, because tackling like you would in football is a good way to get your face broken.” Rugby, Redmond explained, is soccer with contact and football without blocking. Each 80-minute match is played in two 40-minute halves with 15 people on each

team. There are no forward passes, no blocking and the ball is always live. A try (similar to football’s touchdown) gets a team five points, The try’s resulting conversion kick gets a team two and a kick, like a field goal, gets three. “It’s football scoring in a much faster game,” he said, adding that there are no huddles. “During 80 minutes of a rugby game, you’ll probably see 75 minutes of action.” With a successful season under their belts, some might think the Mad Dogs surely have all these basics down and can rest up for their playoff game. But Redmond said there’s work still to be done between now and April 14. “Well, it’s going to be hot in Little Rock, hot and muggy, so we’re doing lots of conditioning. Run till you drop,” he said. “Our game plan is in place, so we’re just working on timing, communication and skills.” A win against Little Rock means the Mad Dogs will qualify for the south finals before the east finals and the national championships. The south final, he said, is also held in Arkansas. “Two weeks after that, we’d turn around and go back to Little Rock. It’s 12 hours in a car or 25 years into the past, whichever way you want to look at it,” Redmond laughed. “I probably shouldn’t have said that.” For more information on the Augusta Mad Dogs rugby club, visit augustarugby.org.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 11

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Daniel Field in Augusta to those in Thomson and Aiken will be also be affected, said Becky Shealy, interim airport field manager for Daniel Field and marketing director for Augusta Aviation. On an average week, Daniel Field lands 80 planes. During Masters Week, that number increases to 80 planes a day. For AGS, the number reaches well into the hundreds. William Thompson Jr., director of aircraft services for AGS, said that Masters Week 2011 experienced 2,200 plane arrivals for the week, which averages to 275 planes a day for eight days. Sometimes, there are too many incoming planes in the Augusta airspace and a ground stop is called. “It’s like going to the mall and there are no parking spaces available,” Thompson said. “When that happens at this airport, the Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) puts a stop on all traffic coming to Augusta. No matter where you’re coming from, (pilots) want to hold until (the FAA) opens up parking. That is probably the biggest delay we ever have. That happened three or four times last year and will probably happen this year.” Pilots will have the option, depending on aircraft size and insurance requirements, to land elsewhere until Augusta airspace reopens. This is when the smaller airports come into play. “In reality, Daniel Field is a reliever airport for Bush Field because (Bush) gets the bigger aircraft,” Shealy said. “When those airplanes land at (AGS), they’re starting to take up their parking space, so the smaller airplanes come here.” Both airports have taxis, golf carts and other ground transportation available for incoming and outgoing passengers. “As far as dignitaries, the only people that are allowed to get people off of the planes are the Augusta National vans, and we don’t know who is on those planes,” Shealy said. “(T) here is a gentlemen’s rule that you do not ask who is on those planes.” AGS also maintains the anonymity of their “well-known” guests, but worries that the incoming and outgoing ground traffic may not be as smooth as in previous years. “This year, because of the construction of our new facility, it’s going to be a problem,” Thompson said. “Normally we have an arrival area right in front of the (general aviation) parking where we transfer people and bags from the airplanes to ground transportation. We’re doing our best with what we have. We have extra people laid on and we have extra golf carts.” Though flight traffic is relatively constant throughout the day for both airports, the heaviest incoming traffic occurs between 6 a.m. and 10 a.m. and the heaviest outgoing traffic occurs between 4 p.m. and 7 p.m. “After the tournament is over and that green jacket is awarded, everyone is ready to go,” Thompson said. “You have to orchestrate everybody so that everyone can leave in a timely manner. There’ll be a mass exodus on Sunday.” For the workers, regular employees and seasonal hires, their feelings after Sunday can be summed up in one word. “Relief,” Thompson said. “The guys and ladies will work 10- to 12-hour days, seven to eight days in a row. Come Sunday afternoon, they’re tired. On Monday morning, we have to get them back together so we can give them some time off.”

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ARIES (March 21-April 19)

“Born in a rancid, bat-infested cave at the base of the smoldering Sangay Volcano, I was raised by the half-bear demon princess Arcastia. At the age of four my training as a ninja shaman began when I was left naked and alone next to a stream of burning lava with only two safety pins, a package of dental floss and a plastic bag full of Cheerios. My mission: to find my way to my spiritual home.” Compose your own version of this declaration: a playful, over-the-top myth about your origins that gives you a greater appreciation for the heroic journey you’ve been on.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)

Our ancestors owned slaves and denied education to girls. What were they thinking? Time magazine asked historian David McCullough if there was anything we do today that our descendants will regard as equally insane and inexcusable. His reply: “How we could have spent so much time watching TV.” Think of some things you did when you were younger that now seem incomprehensible or ignorant. Then explore the possibility that you will look back with incredulity at some weird habit or tweaked form of self-indulgence you’re pursuing today.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20)

“I can’t tell if I’m dealing well with life these days or if I just don’t give a sh-- any more.” Consider that comment at someecards.com. You may be pondering the same riddle: feeling suspicious about why you seem more relaxed and tolerant than usual in the face of plain old everyday chaos. Your recent equanimity is not rooted in jaded numbness, but is the result of hard work you did on yourself during the last six months.

CANCER (June 21-July 22)

What excites you? What mobilizes your selfdiscipline and inspires you to see the big picture? Identify those sources of high-octane fuel, and then take extraordinary measures to make them a strong presence in your life. It could create effects that will last for years.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22)

While browsing in a bookstore, I came across a book and deck of cards that were collectively called Tarot Secrets and subtitled “A Fast and Easy Way to Learn a Powerful Ancient Art.” I snorted derisively, since I have studied Tarot intensively for years and am nowhere near mastery. Later, though, I softened my attitude a bit. You just might be able to learn a rather substantial skill in a relatively short time.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22)

Writing in The New Yorker, Joanna Ravenna paraphrased German philosopher Nietzsche: “The best way to enrage people is to force them to change their mind about you.” See if you can amuse and entertain people, not enrage them, by compelling them to change their minds about you. You can pull it off.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22)

In 1892, when Wrigley was just starting out as a company, its main product was baking powder. Free chewing gum was included in each package as a promotional gimmick. But soon the freebie became so popular that Wrigley rearranged its entire business. Now it’s a multi-billion-dollar company that sells gum in 140 different countries — and no baking powder.

What seemed like the main event could turn out to be secondary, or what seemed incidental might become a centerpiece. Is there something you are overvaluing at the cost of something you are undervaluing?

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21)

People in intimate relationships are hypersensitive to negative comments from their partners. Psychologists say it takes five compliments to outweigh the effects of a single derogatory criticism. Be extra careful not to dispense barbs. They would be especially damaging during this phase, both to you and to those at whom you direct them. Instead, why not dole out an abundance of compliments? They will build up a reservoir of goodwill you’ll be able to draw on for a long time.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21)

Researchers report that the typical man falls in love 5.4 times over the course of his life, while the average woman basks in the glow of this great mystery on 4.6 occasions. I suspect you may be close to having a .4 or .6 type of experience: sort of like infatuation, but without the crazed mania. The challenging spiritual project that relationship offers may be most viable when the two people involved are not electrifyingly interwoven with every last one of their karmic threads.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19)

“I couldn’t wait for success,” said rich and famous comedian Jonathan Winters, “so I went ahead without it.” Is there any area of your life that is held captive by an image of perfection? Consider the possibility that shiny concepts of victory and progress might be distracting you from doing the work that will bring you meaning and fulfillment. If you’re too busy dreaming of someday attaining the ideal mate, weight, job, pleasure and community, you may miss out on the imperfect but amazing opportunities that are available right now.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18)

On reddit.com, Kaushalp88 asked, “What is the most badass thing that you have ever done, but that other people weren’t impressed by?” Here’s his own story: “I was at an ice-cream shop. At the exit, there was a small raised step I didn’t see. I tripped over it with my ice cream cone in my right hand. The ice cream ball sprung out of the cone. I instinctively lurched my left hand forward and grabbed it, but at the same time I was already falling toward the pavement. I tucked my head into my chest and made a perfect somersault, rising to my feet and plopping the ice cream back in the cone.” You will soon have comparable experiences, unusual triumphs and unexpected accomplishments. But you may have to be content with provoking awe in no one else beside yourself.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20)

“Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow,” says a Swedish proverb. Of course there are real hazards and difficulties in life, and they deserve your ingenious problem-solving. But why devote any of your precious energy to becoming embroiled in merely hyped-up hazards and hypothetical difficulties? Now is a propitious time to cut shadows down to their proper size and liberate yourself from needless anxiety. You’ll be amazed at how much more accurate your perceptions will be as a result.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 13

14 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

V. 23 | NO. 14

Ruffin’ It

TERENCEBARBER

The Hoodie Chronicles

Or, what happens in a country that enables bigotry and excuses carelessness

On the topmost layer, at least, we all know by now what has happened to Trayvon Martin. These are the facts, the indisputable facts: he was walking down a dark or dimly lit street. He was wearing a hoodie, and carrying a small bag of Skittles and an iced tea. He exchanged heated words with one George Zimmerman, a neighborhood watch leader of mixed Peruvian/Caucasian ethnicity. Trayvon Martin was shot dead at 17 years of age. He was not armed. In Florida, there is a law known as “Stand Your Ground,” which states that “a person may use deadly force in self-defense when there is reasonable belief of a threat, without an obligation to retreat first.” Proponents of the law would say that it should make the matter simple: if you believe Zimmerman, he was attacked first, believed the boy was armed and acted accordingly. In truth — putting aside for the moment the very relevant argument of whether or not such a law has any place in our society — it serves only to further the ambiguousness of the situation. Specific words from the law itself that we can call into question here are self-defense, reasonable, belief and threat. I cannot presume to know George Zimmerman’s mind. The man is precisely my age — 28 years old — and I can no more fathom him than I can string theory. He says he felt fear for his life, that the combination of Trayvon’s wardrobe (he was wearing a hoodie) and that it appeared the boy was carrying a weapon was sufficient justification for the shooting. Two things: I have at least half a dozen hoodies more inherently threatening than the one Trayvon was probably wearing. I don’t know exactly what it looked like, but I seriously doubt it read “Agoraphobic Nosebleed,” “East Coast Gonzo Violence” or depicted a shroom-andcocaine-induced blood ritual. Yes, these are actual things, and I have them. I have worn them, hood-up, in New York City, Chicago, Washington D.C., Atlanta, Augusta, Boston and a smattering of small Southern towns. I am still alive, and so are a hell of a lot of other people who own them. I am also white. The second: Zimmerman asserts that he was attacked by Trayvon prior to the shooting. This runs directly counter to his previous assertion that he mistook the bag of Skittles for a gun. I would hope that Zimmerman is not stupid enough to have a bag of Skittles right on freaking top of him and still mistake it for a deadly weapon. Ergo, Zimmerman had plenty of time to realize that Trayvon was not armed, and yet he shot him anyway. Let me repeat that: Zimmerman shot a clearly unarmed 17-year-old boy. Was Zimmerman being assaulted? Maybe. And under the current Florida law, he was encouraged to meet fist not with fist, but with a bullet. In the interest of full disclosure, I believe George Zimmerman to be guilty as hell. I also believe that his actions were perpetuated by a combination of inherent or learned prejudice and a spastic trigger finger. This is not a column about condemnation — it is about the pitfalls of a culture than enables bigotry (efforts are underway to disparage Trayvon’s name, though there is a whole other column’s worth of discussion as to whether behavioral problems warranted murder) and excuses fatal carelessness. Over one year ago, I attended the 2011 AWP Conference in Washington, D.C., to meet, talk to and get drunk with a bunch of other writers. We stayed in hotels among high rises, fine dining establishments and way too many coffee shops. One night, though, my fiancée and I walked through one of the rougher areas of the city — not crime-ridden, necessarily, but rough — where she used to work on houses for Americorps. We were dressed nicely, I in a button-down and blazer, she in a cashmere sweater and highheeled boots. We passed the house where she used to live, the moon illuminating what the burned-out streetlights left dark. Approaching us, on the same side of the street, on the same sidewalk, were three black boys — late teens, I think. Caps pulled low, five inches of boxer shorts visible above belted pants, bandanas. I hate to put it like this, but they were what Strom Thurmond would have drawn if you asked him what he fears most. It was a chilly night, but one of them went shirtless, and as they neared I could make out an epsilon branded into his right pec. No one quickened their pace, though I can’t speak for pulses. We made eye contact, passed each other without moving to the side and that was that. Afterward, we boarded the subway to head back to our hotel. I was standing, too jittery to sit. My fiancée put her fingers lightly to my arm, said “Sweetie.” I looked down at my hand, grasping the metal rail. I was squeezing all the blood away from the knuckles, the whiteness violent and obvious. We rode the train in silence, encased in a roar, propelled terribly forward.

Your Weird Week in Crime: Masters Edition Is Augusta-Richmond County really as crime ridden as you think it is? As the crimes and the times change, so will the report. Even with the end of tax season quickly approaching, it seems the majority of the crimes committed last week were thefts, assaults and criminal trespassing. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep an eye out on your financial information, though. One theft to pull off another One Monday, March 26, an Augusta woman had her vehicle stolen. That same vehicle was identified in a yard theft of two refrigerators later that day. When Facebook turns violent On Tuesday, March 27, an Augustan resident was assaulted outside of a DMV office. The victim and the attacker have a prior history regarding an assault case together. Whether that was the cause of this assault was unknown, but the victim thought the attack was at the DMV because of a Facebook post the victim made. Make sure the car works before you steal it An Augusta man had his vehicle broken into, then hotwired on Friday, March 30. The would-be thief was caught on surveillance. The victim said the car couldn’t run because it had carburetor issues, which meant the hotwiring failed and the thief left cold. William Tell in Augusta? In the middle of the afternoon of Saturday, March 31, an Augusta man had an arrow shot through the back window of his apartment. The arrow shot was believed to have be accidental, but RCSO is holding on to the arrow was evidence for a case. A string of shootings Three separate shooting incidents occurred between Friday, March 30, and Saturday, March 31. On March 30, a witness/victim saw two groups fighting each other, one screaming “Hilltop” and the other “Walker Street.” The victim and passenger then fled to their vehicle. One of the groups (it is unclear which) got into a vehicle and followed, firing four .40 caliber shots before the victim was able to lose them. On Saturday, March 31 two victims were shot and taken for medical treatment. The victims were found at two separate locations, one on 1st Avenue on Bolt Drive and the other on 15th Avenue at Old Savannah Road. Also on Saturday, March 31, a man was found shot in the legs. The victim was able to identify his shooter before he was taken in for medical treatment. Crime totals for the week 77 counts of larceny (both felony and misdemeanor) 30 counts of assault 24 counts of invasion of privacy Eight counts of burglary with forced entry (time unknown) Seven counts of burglary with forced entry (daytime) Seven counts of identity fraud Six counts of public peace disturbance Six counts of financial fraud Five counts of property damage Five counts of burglary with forced entry (night time) Two counts of theft by deception Two counts of terroristic threats Two count of robbery (armed and attempted) One count of forgery One count of theft/mislaid property One count of burglary with no forced entry (daytime) One count of burglary with no forced entry (time unknown)

JOSHRUFFIN, an ASU and Metro Spirit alum, is a published journalist and poet,

who just received his MFA from Georgia College & State University. He was once the most un-intimidating bouncer at Soul Bar.

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 15

TWO-FOR-ONE SPECIAL By Patrick Berry / Edited by Will Shortz

92Casino souvenir 96“Entourage” agent Gold 97Back stroke? 99Goddess of gas? 102Get part of one’s shirt under control? 106Poppies, e.g. 107Undamaged 108What the Gorgon Stheno does in Greek myth? 113Render unproductive? 114Dressage gait 115Noisy water heater 116Old Soviet naval base site 117Vodka brand 118“Borrow” 119Rubber-stamps Down 1Early enough 2At the back 3Ones going on a long walk? 4Old machinery coating 5Actress Vardalos 6___ Mail 7“You know better!” 8Belarus, once: Abbr. 9Venae ___ (large blood vessels) 10It can make you dizzy 11Yom Kippur War politician 12Revolutionary device? 13Longtime Redskins coach Joe 14The Andrea Doria, for one 15Chemistry Nobelist Otto 16King of Naples in “The Tempest” 17Cheese off 18Baseball team once owned by Ray Kroc 20Like kiwi fruit 24With proficiency 28Pinch 30Exam administered four times a yr. 31“Lou Grant” production co. 32Caribbean resort island 33Army heads 38Pledge of Allegiance finisher 39Like most canned tomatoes 41Defensive return 42Reacted to shocking news 43“Watch your ___!” 44Took a few seconds? 45Podium personage 46They’re not popular in offices

47___ oneself (share private thoughts) 48Workhorse’s quality 49Phoebe of “Drop Dead Fred” 51Sunni sermonizer 52Communication system of old 53Exchanged, as words 54Reckless driver’s loss, possibly 55Becomes clear 61More copious 62Wisdom tooth, e.g. 64Caesar’s first wife 65Maker of Bug-B-Gon 67Adds, as to a recording 68Print shop unit 69Salty language 72Interrupter of Dagwood’s naps 75Kentucky Derby and Epsom Oaks, for two 76Old sofa’s problem 77Concerned about the environment 80Can of Newcastle 81Young chap 82___ Bud, schoolgirl in “The Mystery of Edwin Drood” 86M.A. seeker’s test 87Director and star of “Looking for Richard” 88Free of creases 89Shaw defined it as “insufficient temptation” 90Disney subsidiary 91Drive-___ 92Holder of plunder 93Regarding this matter 94How Sam’s Club buys goods 95Free tickets 98Extremist 99George Jetson’s boy 100Scrumptious 101Outside shot? 103Cry often made while snapping the fingers 104Elects 105Read but never post 109“Too many to list” abbr. 110Poseidon’s domain 111Launch platform 112Record with many beats: Abbr.

43 50

56 60

102

103

99 104

100

105

106

107

108

109

114

115

116

117

118

S P A n

T A l E

A n T E

f I R S T

I R A Q I

R E V U E

R O A A C T J A m

A T I l T

101

113

C H I C D E m O T A m l D U E m O n S E V E l R E T A C R OW

78 82

45 52

28 34 38

42 47

27 30

PREVIOUSPUZZLEANSWERS

Across 1Border-crossing necessities 4Black cloud formers 9Unresponsive state 13A flat equivalent 19Hitchcock thriller set in Brazil 21It’s all downhill from here 22Nation bordering Svizzera 23Ordeal that’s no big deal? 25Gaze upon 26It’s much followed in North Africa 27Large cloth sign with nothing on it? 29Toy hammer? 34Ending with sex or symbol 35Seek redress from 36“Anything ___?” 37Potential pet 38Smartphone buy 40Swine’s diet 42Full range 43For ___ 45“So that’s your game!” 46Gulf of Oman port 50Soft yet easily breakable “Star Trek” creature? 56Available 57“Save Me” singer Mann 58Break in logic 59Fire starter? 60Magic, for instance 63Refresher 64European of the Iron Age 65In days gone by 66Hemispherical computer add-on? 68“Ride ’em, cowboy!,” e.g.? 70In its current state 71“As if that weren’t enough …” 72Perpetually, to Pope 73What only one Best Picture winner has had 74In the distance 75Dieter’s target 76“The cat’s meow” or “a dog’s life” 78“___ Eyes” (1969 hit for the Guess Who) 79Big house that’s not as big? 82Site of one of the Seven Wonders 83Rower’s need 84“I hate the Moor” speaker 85Young builder’s supply 87Point of rotation 90Plus 91Floors

110

111

S E T C E T E R A E T H R E E C A R n C R U n C H TI mE S H E m H O O G E R A B C B R S E n D S U P P R E G H O E T E T R A D Pl EA SE RS S Q U E E Z S I R S A C U f f A m E n S T S l O T I n C A K E BR EA Kf AS TS T n T A R S U m O S A R I A D l E X E R C l U T C A E n E I D G A P E S m G A S S O l I D S C R U m P l E ZO nE C O E D E A R n S T H A S H Bl OS SO mS E K E S O R O U I S I n C A R E S D O A T A n D m A P P I n C H RU nn ER U A T E E n T H U S E D SE SS IO nS C O V E n T R y

112

119

P I T I E S E l f S H I m m y U P

A C K An Im Al m E A n I T U R n S T O S T E I T S I S CO nf ER En CE P O K E S Pl Ay E C U E S l A P A n T S E A R C H A T E I T PE Rf OR mA nC ES n A S P O T U T P A C T DI SC l A I l A T m A l l R E E m I E A n n A n C l E R G y T A X I E D S I T A R S

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ne of the unexpected pleasures of Masters Week was the three hours we spent here at the Spirit offices with PGA great Doug Sanders. Flamboyant and charismatic, Sanders is obviously a man of many passions, but none came across stronger than his passion for junior golf and the championship he’s created for it. Established in 1978 as a way to give back to the sport that had given him so much, The Doug Sanders International Junior Golf Championship developed as a way to support and promote junior golf while providing educational opportunities for kids spread across six continents. As a kid, Sanders was the beneficiary of a charitable contribution that allowed him to pursue his golf career and further his life. With his Junior Golf Championship, he says he’s found a way to continue the tradition. “I’ve devoted so much of my time and sent so many kids to school though this program,” he says. “I just want to give these kids an opportunity to have a chance in life.” Anyone on the grounds Thursday should feel free to search him out. He’ll be under the big tree by the clubhouse. And trust us — you won’t be able to miss him.

V. 23 | NO. 14

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 17

erious golf fans will remember Doug Sanders for his short swing, his straight drives — “They said I hit the ball so straight that I only left the fairway to get a phone number” — his colorful clothes and a 30-inch missed putt at the 1970 British Open. But for the rest of us, Sanders has receded into the misty haze of the last century. Spend five minutes with Sanders today, as we did when the legendary golfer visited the Metro Spirit’s office on Monday, and it’s immediately clear that while he may have receded from our memory, he damn sure never receded from the world. But what do you do with a 79-year-old man who continues to love life the way Sinatra and Dino and the rest of the Rat Pack taught him to love it? You make a movie about him before it’s too late. For Sanders, a savvy, confident kid from the cotton fields of northwest Georgia, the timing of his life was perfect. A star golfer for the University of Florida, he won the Canadian Open as an amateur in 1956, which put him in Las Vegas for the next year’s Tournament of Champions. While he may have grown up in Cedartown, Georgia, he was born for Vegas, especially Vegas in the 1950s, and soon he was introduced to the core group of celebrities that would populate his world and establish his values. “I met all the guys and they wanted to be around me because I was a good looking little old kid back in those days,” he says. “And I liked them, so we fit together like a T.” Though he was younger than most of the crowd he ran with, they immediately recognized a kindred spirit and quickly admitted him into the inner circle. “I kind of backed away a little bit at first because these were the people you saw in the movies,” he says. “I didn’t jump up and take over anything, but they’d always ask me to do this, that or the other thing. I loved them because they were good guys and they were great friends of mine.” And as Sanders grew in stature — he won 20 PGA tournaments and established a popular Celebrity Classic — those friendships would only solidify. “We became family,” he says. “They’d come to my house. I’d stay at Sinatra’s house. Clint Eastwood would stay there — Andy Williams, Sammy Davis. One weekend, Bob Newhart stayed in the bedroom on the left in my guest house and it was Ed McMahon in the right bedroom.” While younger people today might struggle to place Andy Williams or Ed McMahon, at the time these were celebrities of the first order. The Georgia boy was living in high, high cotton. Though Sanders had those 20 tour wins and was a couple of pars and a couple of birdies short of winning four majors, it’s that 30-inch putt he missed at the 1970 British Open that people can’t seem to forget, and Sanders graciously indulges the question yet again. “You’ll never believe how much time I think about that,” he says. “I knew how far the caddie told me to hit the ball, but it didn’t look that far, so I decided to walk up there and count the yardage and give the fans a little something to talk about until I got ready to hit it.” When he hit it, the ball went beyond the cup and he missed the ensuing 30-inch putt, sending him into a playoff with the Golden Bear. There, he played him neck and neck until the 18th hole, when he drove the ball just inches short of the green. “Jack took off that yellow sweater and I said, ‘Look out, big boy.’” Nicklaus knocked it over the green, then chipped down about 12 feet and

18 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

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knocked it in the hole, throwing his putter straight up in the air. “I looked around and I didn’t see the putter,” Sanders says. “So I’m putting my hands up and he’s running over trying to put his hands above my head and I said, ‘Jack, dammit — it’s bad enough you beat me, but you don’t have to hit me upside my head on top of it.’” Like all golfers, Sanders has plenty of stories to tell, but because not all golfers are like Doug Sanders, most of his stories tend to be mind blowing to our moderated, domesticated sensibilities. In so many ways, Sanders is a relic from a bygone era, an affront to our modern notion of proper masculine behavior; consequently, he’s irresistible. His stubborn refusal to conform to the changing times is endearing, and in that way he’s even more fascinating. “One year up there (the tournament doesn’t matter), there were six good-looking ladies,” is how one of his stories starts, and as he unapologetically describes the way the women drew straws to see who got to bring him his Bloody Mary in the morning, you can’t help wondering how the world he’s describing was ever allowed to vanish (or, if you’re a woman, how it was ever allowed to exist). “This one lady — I can’t tell you her name, but she was well known throughout the world — won three mornings in a row,” he says with a smile. “We had a great time.” Though he obviously knew how to enjoy himself by the looser standards of the day, he was nevertheless dedicated to his sport. And in spite of his defeat at the British Open, he speaks highly of Nicklaus as well as Player and the other greats, although he reserves special praise for Arnold Palmer. “I wish to hell the pros would go back and interview him and learn something from this man,” he says. “You’re not going to find another man like Arnold Palmer.” Tournament golf, however, just isn’t what it used to be, he says. “Some of the courses have changed so much,” he says. “Look what they’ve done at Augusta. Whenever they moved all those tees, they probably eliminated at least 50 or 60 percent of the people because they’ve got no chance to be able to reach the greens on the par fives. So they’ve added yardage to it rather than moving them around and having rough and smaller greens.” In addition to the courses, the golfers themselves don’t share the same sense of camaraderie, he says. “We were friends,” he says. “Now, everyone goes off to their own worlds. They don’t stop and talk to you about anything at all.” Though he was something of an anomaly, able to absorb large amounts of alcohol and fun while requiring very little sleep, he says they all remained a family in spite of their differences. “I don’t think that they ever tried to get in the same form of life,” he says. “Like Raymond Floyd. Raymond’s a great guy and a great family man now, but back then, Sinatra and Andy Williams used to call him Junior all the time after me — the Junior Doug Sanders. And I’m telling you, he had the potential to get there, too.” In spite of the carousing,

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 19

Doug Sanders and Kirk Douglas

he says, it was a more congenial time. “That’s the way we lived back then,” he says. “We knew the wives’ names and the kids’ birthdays. But today, it’s all about how big your airplane is.” Though Tiger isn’t responsible for all the changes in golf, he definitely represents the beginning of an era, and when asked whether or not Tiger has been good for golf, Sanders demurs. “I can’t answer that yes or no,” he says. “He’s worked hard. He’s a great player and he’s done a lot for golf with the First Tee, but I don’t know where he’s going.” As for Tiger’s female problems, he says he can sympathize to a point, given the life he lived. That said, Sanders explains that he seemed to have a different relationship with his girlfriends than Tiger did. For one thing, he remained friends with just about all of his girlfriends, in part because they, too, would invest something in the relationship — maybe a plane ticket or traveling expenses — whereas Tiger would simply send his plane to pick them up. “But Tiger can’t take someone out,” he says. “I was kind of out in the open because I was running with those guys, and they didn’t really know if the girl was sitting with me or Sinatra or who.” For all his colorful clothes — he’s known as the Peacock of the Fairway

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SURREY CENTER V. 23 | NO. 14

Tip O’Neill, Doug Sanders and President Gerald Ford

“When those 10 men gave me the $10 apiece, I went up there and won the tournament, and it game me an opportunity,” he says. “I went on to win 20 times, but I never would have done any of that if it hadn’t been for those 10 men. I’m indebted to those people.” To give back, Sanders has established the Doug Sanders International Junior Golf Championship, a yearly event in which young players from all over the world compete against each other. Steve Elkington and Billy Mayfair are past winners of the event. Junior golf has become such an important part of his life that he says he’s planning to leave all his memorabilia to Junior Golf, and his collection is formidable. “I’ve spent over $100,000 just in

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and is still recognized on golf courses purely from the flamboyance of his color scheme — Sanders grew up in the dust and grime of rural Georgia, where his mom and dad picked cotton, 100 pounds to the dollar. “I didn’t have my own shoes until I was probably 10 years old,” he says. That first pair of shoes came from money he made hustling adults at the local nine-hole golf course where he caddied. “I went downtown and fulfilled a dream,” he says. “I bought my own shoes, and I’m walking down the street and I’m thinking every car is looking at

my shoes.” Another dream — not walking the two and a half miles to the golf course — he was able to achieve by buying a lady’s bicycle for $10.50. In high school, he came to Augusta to qualify for the National Junior Tournament, but the family didn’t have the money to get him to the finals in North Carolina, so 10 men in town each gave him $10, which is something he’s still never forgotten. “When those 10 men gave me the $10 apiece, I went up there and won the tournament, and it game me an opportunity,” he says. “I went on to win

20 times, but I never would have done any of that if it hadn’t been for those 10 men. I’m indebted to those people.” To give back, Sanders has established the Doug Sanders International Junior Golf Championship, a yearly event in which young players from all over the world compete against each other. Steve Elkington and Billy Mayfair are past winners of the event. Junior golf has become such an important part of his life that he says he’s planning to leave all his memorabilia to Junior Golf, and his collection is formidable. “I’ve spent over $100,000 just in

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 21

Dean Martin and Sanders

Clint Eastwood, Sanders and Andy Williams

Sanders and Sammy Davis Jr.

22 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

postage sending these bags back and forth,” he says, referring to the monogrammed golf bags that he has signed by everyone from golfers to past presidents. He also has a major collection of signed golf gloves. “Every glove I send out to have signed, it’s $150,” he says. “By the time I talk to them and have the secretary pack all the bags up and take them down — her time is $50 and Federal Express is $50 to send it there and $50 to send it back.” Unlike the monuments to personal achievement that many successful athletes compile, most of what Sanders has built has nothing to do with him other than the fact that he’s got the connections and the drive to make it all happen. “To think about getting something done is one thing,” he says, “but to get it done is something else.” As far as the memorabilia goes, he’s accomplished just about all the things he set out to accomplish. “I just need about 20 more gloves from Tiger and six more from Tom Watson, but Watson won’t sign shit,” he says. What he might lack in Tom Watson signatures he more than makes up for with astronauts. First American in Space. First American to set foot on the moon. Last American to set foot on the moon. When you’ve lived the life of a PGA tournament pro from the late ’50s

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photo by: Michael Johnson Paul Skellett, Sanders, Jack Fleck & Simon Weitzman to the early ’70s, you’re going to know astronauts. “I’ve flown more supersonic fighter planes than any civilian in the world,” he says. “But I’m not a pilot. They take me up and let me touch the stick.” His favorite flight? It was a series of launches off the deck of the USS America in an F-14. “The last one was with the afterburner — sheeeewww, I had one ball in each shoe.” The stories are endless and Sanders is tireless. There’s the one about being disqualified for not signing his scorecard (“A lot of my things happen because of

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Don Johnson and Sanders on the set of “Tin Cup”

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 23

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a woman” is how it starts), the one about bribing his teacher with a case of Chivas Regal and the one about hiring a hit man for starters. Because the stories are so good and the cast of characters is so recognizable, Hollywood producers Tom Ford and Jon Fish, who are currently working on a $35 million film about former Philadelphia Eagles owner Jerry Wolman called “The Richest Man in the World,” are planning a feature film about Sanders. Though it’s still a project early in development, it’s a serious endeavor and the production team is actively securing the film professionals needed to turn the stories into a film. Independently, actor Kevin Costner has already offered to play Sanders for free if he would be allowed to play the real Doug Sanders. With all the buzz and excitement — earlier this week, he was at the launch of the Golf Bible hosted by Frank Christian and he can be found under the tree by the clubhouse on Thursday — Sanders comes back to the relationships he’s made in his life, the quiet times shared with his celebrity friends. “Sometimes, when you’re open and you sit there and it’s just the two of you, you get to talking about something,” he says. “I don’t know why, but they’d always trust me — and I’d never tell anybody anything — but you just get to talking and you get so free, just the two of you. And they can tell you things you know they don’t want out there. But they just had trust in me.” But even with that knowledge and the satisfaction of being a confidant, you get the feeling that it’s maybe not so easy being the last man standing. “When you get home sometimes and you’re just sitting there and you look up on the walls and there’s Gleason, there’s Sammy Davis, there’s Sinatra and John Wayne and everybody…” His voice trails off, and for the first time he looks like a man facing his 80th birthday. V. 23 | NO. 14

V. 23 | NO. 14

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 25

Michael Johnson

mejphoto.photoreflect.com

Katie Smith, Sydney Jones and Ashley Perala at French Market Grille.

SIGHTINGS

James Roussos, Betsy Baker, Holli Young and Shannon Lowry at Somewhere in Augusta.

Kaitlin Mongan, Amanda Hart and Jennifer Arnold at TakoSushi.

SIGHTINGS

Jason White, Erin Borgner, Katie Schultz and Keith Borgner at Bar West.

Heather Reese, guitarist George Lynch and Anne Whitfield at Rock Bottom Music.

SIGHTINGS

April Snipes, Alex Kizer and Kaitlyn Hurst at The Country Club.

26 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Dusty Walker and Kendra Bradley with Brittany and Lucas Weiss at The Library.

Robert Anderson and Carmelita Melecio with April and Jonathan Kareis at Midtown Lounge.

Michael Johnson

mejphoto.photoreflect.com

Ashley Fiveash, Jodie Yu and Allie Young at Midtown Lounge.

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A Treasure Trove of Masters Memories Augusta Mayor Deke Copenhaver

As we welcome the world to Augusta for another Masters Week, it’s a good time to stop and consider just how important this event is to the fabric of our community. One thing I like to point out to residents and visitors alike is that each year as mayor, I get the opportunity to basically do an international press junket promoting our city in the weeks leading up to the tournament. This is something I never take for granted as I realize that this is an opportunity that most cities the size of Augusta simply don’t have. I also believe it’s important to remember that being home to the most revered golfing event in the world has led to Augusta becoming an internationally known brand name associated with excellence and that simply saying where we’re from is an automatic conversation starter with people both nationally and internationally. How many other cities can make that claim? Having grown up in Augusta, I have a treasure trove of Masters memories dating back to my childhood. While working the tournament as a teenager, I met 1976 champion Raymond Floyd, never knowing that I would one day be honoring him in 2006 at the Mayor’s Masters Reception. As a college student in 1987, I watched Larry

Mize, who had lived just down the street from me, chip in for his Masters victory. Once again, I never would have imagined that, 24 years later, I would be honoring our hometown hero at the 2011 Mayor’s Masters Reception. Several more of my often surreal Masters moments include discussing the filming of “The Passion of the Christ” with Jim Caviezel, who portrayed the legendary Bobby Jones in the film “Bobby Jones: Stroke of Genius,” meeting up with Tiger Woods unexpectedly in the parking lot and welcoming him back to Augusta, and having 1979 champion Fuzzy Zoeller stop by my house for a visit after we honored him at the 2010 Mayor’s Masters Reception. As great of a city as Augusta is, I can honestly say that we simply wouldn’t be where we are today without the Masters.

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Call today to schedule your pre-season checkup. 706.722.5304 www.sigcox.com V. 23 | NO. 14

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Bar West

The Cotton Patch

An upscale martini bar and lounge with a great covered patio. That patio is a great place to spend happy hour, which is daily from 4:30-8:30 p.m. and includes specials such as two for one house wines and sangria.

816 Cotton Lane | 706-724-4511 | eatdrinkbehappy.com Nice patio reminiscent of New Orleans, friendly service and good drink specials. If you’re lucky, or not so lucky, while sitting outside you can be entertained (for better or worse) by the karaoke from Mi Rancho.

The Bee’s Knees

The Country Club

3631 Walton Way Ext., Augusta | 706-736-0021

211 10th St., Augusta | 706.828.3600 | beeskneestapas.com

Nightly drink specials, eclectic tapas menu, an ever-changing beer and wine list and a menu of unique cocktails in an artsy, cosmopolitan atmosphere. The buffalo tempeh and the Buddha salad with tofu croutons will make you want to become a vegetarian… almost, and Sunday brunch is a must. Even better: All their weekly drink specials are in effect on Sundays.

Blue Sky Kitchen

990 Broad St., Augusta | 706.821.3988

Southern fusion cuisine with great dishes like curry fried chicken, redneck stir-fry and coconut curry chicken soup. Full bar, friendly wait staff, excellent location. Live music on the weekends, nightly specials and check the board for dessert options.

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2834 Washington Rd., Augusta | 706-364-1862 | augustacountry.com

A massive club with several bars around the perimeter of an enormous stage and dance floor. Entertainment this week includes Swinging Medallions on Thursday, April 5; Ross Coppley on Friday, April 6; and Gary Ray on Saturday, April 7.

Crums on Central

1855 Central Ave., Augusta | 706-729-6969 | crumsoncentral.com

Lunch during the week, brunch on the weekends and dinner Tuesday-Sunday, Crums is located in the former Cafe du Teau. They kept the relaxing front deck and changed the food from French-Creole to upscale Southern with a twist. It’s probably the only place in town that has deviled eggs and boiled peanuts on the menu, and where you can top your pizza with squash casserole. Also keep an eye out for the restaurant’s food truck this week. V. 23 | NO. 14

MASTERS GUIDE E N T E R TA I N M E N T

Polka Dot Pig Gastropub

399 Highland Ave., Augusta | 706-496-2930 | polkadotpiggp.com

Open in Surrey Center for lunch and dinner Tuesday-Saturday, the Polka Dot Pig offers guests a fantastic beer and wine selection, along with a menu of traditional pub favorites and inventive small and large plates. The Lobster Philly Cheesesteak with gruyere and Cajun hollandaise is a standout.

French Market Grille

Limelite CafĂŠ

One of the most popular restaurants in Augusta, both during Masters Week and year-round, and owned by local fixtures Chuck and Gail Baldwin. You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t go wrong with anything on this menu, but be warned: the barbequed shrimp is really spicy. Save room for one of their award-winning desserts and try a martini served in a Mason jar.

A little local secret? Many of those who go to movies across the street start their night here with mild-yaki wings (a mixture of mild and teriyaki) or another bar snack and one (or two) of the many, many beers they offer on tap or by the bottle. We suggest you do the same.

425 Highland Ave., Augusta | 706-737-4865 | frenchmarketaugusta.com

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1137 Agerton Lane, Augusta | 706-731-0220

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Hammond’s Ferry: A Charming Town Within a Town How do you build a town in the 21st century? Hammond’s Ferry in North Augusta continues to prove the maxim that, when it comes to how we live, the traditional, small-town American model is always a very good bet. In fact, Hammond’s Ferry, located along one mile of riverfront along the Savannah, is simply the completion of the original town plan for North Augusta, designed in 1890 by James Jackson of Augusta. While its master plan (established in partnership with the City of North Augusta and Leyland Alliance, LLC) is roughly only 20 percent complete, it has proven to be one of the most delightful and thriving village centers in the CSRA. “How well people live and interact with one another is directly related to good design,” says community project director Turner Simkins, pictured at right with his son. “The old method of establishing walkable, compact urban neighborhoods with appropriate mixes of housing types,

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commercial facilities and parks was the most appropriate way to establish a place that responsibly and accurately reflects the spirit of this charming town. “ With the community’s architectural standards as precise as that of any successful nationally registered historic district, one actually feels the spirit of a true Rockwellian hamlet. More so that the current neighborhood village center, a true urban town center is designed where Center Street eventually meets the Savannah River just below the new North Augusta City Hall. As far as viability is concerned, the existing village l (located at the intersections of Railroad Avenue and Crystal Lake Drive) has proven that one does not need to be located at the center of “main and main” in order to have a thriving destination. “It is all about a sense of place,” says Simkins. “From this respect, Hammond’s Ferry has nailed it,” With Manuel’s Bread Cafe representing the first commercial venture within the community, it quickly earned a reputation as one of the best restaurants in the city. Then came Edge Salon and Spa, delivering a fun and stylish effervescence with its bustling clientele; and the community now is the proud home to a new restaurant & bar, with Taste, representing a small comfortable yet fashionable atmosphere with outstanding food and fine drinks. These businesses serve as an energetic destination for people throughout the area. Whether arriving by bicycle from the city’s Greeneway path network, by car, boat or through simply walking down the shaded sidewalks, there is a flavor and energy to Hammond’s Ferry found no where else in the metro area. “From the organic farm and community gardens to regular live music and public events and festivals, our little neighborhood proves that people can live together in a much more relaxed and enjoyable pattern that does not rely upon the automobile to take you from place to place,” says Simkins. “It’s a new community, but the values are old. Every day I am there, whether working, eating out or simply visiting with neighbors. I feel like I am on vacation.”

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BUY GET

ONE, MASTERS E N T E R TA I N M E N T Welcome Back ONE

GUIDE

Cameraman in town for another round

CELEBRATING 6 YEARS AT THE MARTINEZ LOCATION.

see page 08

Cinematographer Reuben Porras will never forget the first time he set up his cameras at Augusta National. “The first time I came here was in 1983 and I’ll never forget the very first time I went,” Porras, standing across Lake Olmstead from the Julian Smith Casino on Monday, said. “They told me to go to the tower on the second green. And from there you can see three fairways. It took my breath away. You don’t have to love golf to be blown away by the nature of it.” Porras, in fact, didn’t start out filming golf; rather, he started as a cameraman for a TV news station who, wanting to shoot professional football, submitted his work to NFL Films. He finally got his wish in 1977, when NFL Films sent him to his first game between the New York Jets and the Houston Oilers. Porras became a freelance cameraman in 1978. “I would work during the week shooting news and then go somewhere on Friday, shoot a college game on Friday and — boom boom — head to

the airport and shoot some NFL game on Sunday and then fly home,” he said. “I couldn’t do that now. Traveling with gear? Oh man. It used to be nothing for me to shoot two ground games — shoot a college game on the ground, a pro game on the ground. There’s no way I could do that now.” Since his first time at Augusta National, Porras has shot 8-10 Masters tournaments for everyone from the Golf Channel and PGA Tour Productions to TWI, which handled tournament coverage in Europe. “I was shooting for TWI, which used to do the Masters highlight film for Europe and they represent all sorts of Masters footage in Europe,” he explained. “So I shot TWI out of London for years and years.” It was with TWI that Porras had his most memorable Masters experience: a sort of behind-the-scenes look at golfer Bernhard Langer for a German TV station. “Langer is just an awesome guy, really, really awesome guy,” Porras said. “And it just worked out that the week that we were following him and doing a big thing for German TV, he freaking wins it. That was pretty cool. Pretty cool.”

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Helga’s

2015 Central Ave., Augusta | 706-737-5591 | helgasaugusta.com

A dive bar on Central Avenue, popular with just about everyone from college students to neighborhood regulars. Great selection of beer on tap. Hungry? If you can eat it, they can fry it. Trivia on Thursday and Saturday nights. Always entertaining.

Aubrie - Doubletree

Biz - Cue-n-Brew

The Library

The P.I. Bar & Grill at the Partridge Inn

Sophistication at its finest in Surrey Center, the newly opened Library offers much to do this Masters Week. Thursday features a Tee Off Party; Friday, you won’t want to miss the bikini contest; and Saturday, they play host to a send-off party.

This isn’t just any hotel bar… locals hang out here year-round just to grab a spot on the verandah and watch the world go by. Many dishes from the restaurant are available at the bar to snack on while enjoying wine, beer or cocktails, and there’s live music on Fridays and Saturdays.

469 HIGHLAND AVE., Augusta | 706-364-0786

2110 Walton Way, Augusta | 706-737-8888 | partridgeinn.com

Midtown Lounge

3328 Washington Rd., Augusta | 706-280-3345

Augusta’s newest dance club is in the spot of the former Cadillac’s. This nonsmoking establishment will feature live music during Masters Week, as well as no cover with your Masters badge.

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Pizza Joint

1245 Broad St., Augusta | 706-774-0037 | thepizzajoint.net

With two additional locations in Aiken and Columbia, S.C., the Pizza Joint has become well-loved for their slices, an impressive beer menu and nightly specials. The sandwiches, however, are worth straying from the norm for â&#x20AC;&#x201D; especially the DeVito and the Big Mike.

The Snug

240 Davis Rd., Augusta | 706-863-1118 | thesnug.net

A pretty little restaurant that serves dinner six nights a week. Sure, they serve chicken and seafood, but beef is the real star here and the Black Nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Blue, topped with blue cheese and a blueberry-port sauce, is the steak to order.

Somewhere in Augusta

2820 Washington Rd., Augusta | 706-739-0002 | somewhereinaugusta.com

A bizarre name for a sports bar to be sure. This booming sports bar started out as a small pub in a crack across from the National. It moved a few years ago and grew up. Big time. Walls of TVs, a great menu and sweet location make this a favorite stop for Masters guests.

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Stillwater Taproom

974 Broad St., Augusta | 706-826-9857

A great place to drink. Happy hour specials every day from 4-6 p.m., drink specials every night, laid back atmosphere, live music on the weekends and rocking chairs out front. And they’ll call in an order for you from Nacho Mama’s. What more can you ask for?

Kelsey - Bean Baskette

Lacey - 1102

Natasha - Country Club

Patience - Bar West

Surrey Tavern

471 Highland Ave., Augusta | 706-736-1221

One of Augusta residents’ favorite hangout, both for the live local music and the laid-back vibe. Look for drink specials all week.

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Taste

465 Railroad Ave., N. Augusta | 803-215-623

Recently opened in Hammond’s Ferry across from Manuel’s is this intimate spot for tapas and drinks. Early reviewers recommend the Bianca thin-crust pizza, the Struttin’ John with duck confit and, if straying from wine and beer, the Rum Diary. It’s tiny and only open for dinner Tuesday-Saturday, so planning on arriving early.

Ryanne - TGI Fridays

Sally - Stillwater

Shannon’s

300 Shartom Dr., Augusta | 706-814-7760

Tucked just off Washington Road, this neighborhood bar has been around for longer than most can remember. Intimate, with a fun, cozy feel — It will make you think you’ve stepped into your local pub.

GOLF MAGAZINE’S FAVORITE FOR GREAT FOOD AND LIVE ENTERTAINMENT

Eat. Drink. Be Happy. Sarah - Helga’s

Valerie - Carolina Ale House

STEAKS • CHOPS • BURGERS • SALADS Happy Hour Daily, 4-8pm | Live Entertainment

816 Cotton Lane • Augusta, GA 30901 • 706.724.4511

Wild Wing Café

3035 Washington Rd., Augusta | 706-364-9453 | wildwingcafe.com

www.EatDrinkBeHappy.com 36 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Just on the other side of I-20 on Washington Road, this mega mega bar restaurant is built for crowds. The parking lot alone is big enough to park all the patrons from Rhode Island. Big is the key word here, with live music seven days a week on two stages. Masters Week isn’t for amateurs here. V. 23 | NO. 14

AUGUSTA GYM GUIDE

Pump It Up For The Masters Shape up and look great while attending the Masters at some of our local gyms, all of which offer something for guests Gold’s Gym Step on in and sweat it out at two locations in Augusta. Use the exercise facility and take classes such as Zumba, Body Pump, Body Combat and more. One-week passes are available and also passes for partnering hotels. 596 Bobby Jones Expressway, Suite 130: 706-396-4653 3637 Walton Way Extension: 706-481-0502 goldsgym.com

CrossFit Augusta Get total body fitness and workouts specifically designed for your exercise needs. Work hard and train right with free weights, kettlebells, gymnastic rings, calisthenics exercises and more. 803-292-5108 3475 Old Petersburg Road focabjj.com

Quantum Fitness Get fit and take classes offered such as spin, boot camp, weight training and more. Also offered are individual training and nutrition. 4408 Evans to Locks Road 706-210-1140

Greubel’s MMA Take classes like kickboxing, Brazilian jiu jitsu, judo, boxing, cardio kickboxing boot camp, muy thai, mixed martial arts, circuit training boot camp and open bag/open mat in this one facility. While enjoying the Masters, you can train with Augusta’s finest instructors. 2917 Riverwest Drive 706-737-0911 greubelsmma.com

Anytime Fitness Burn the midnight calories at this 24-hour gym and fitness center. Use cardio machines such as stair climbers, elliptical, treadmills and more. Classes are available and personal training. 341 Fury’s Ferry Road, Suite 2 706-364-2447 anytimefitness.com Live Fit Augusta Utilize this facility filled with extensive cardio machines by Matrix Fitness, free weights and exercise instruction classes. Also, you are welcome to cool down at the smoothie bar to jump start your day. 3830 Washington Road, Suite 15 706-993-3567 livefitaugusta.com Wilson Family Y Make it a family day and workout while your children enjoy their fun in the clubhouse. Take time out to relax and enjoy the indoor pool, sauna and whirlpool. Use the free weights, indoor and outdoor track and shoot some hoops. There are smaller branches throughout town (locations available on their website), but this one has the most to offer, by far. Check out their outdoor running and walking track as well. 3570 Wheeler Road 706-922-9622 thefamilyy.org

Champion Fitness Look and feel like a champ during the Masters Week. Work on your abs, get help with speed and agility training, personal training and strength and resistance training to reduce body fat. 3836 Washington Road 706-726-1382 championfitaugusta.com The Ultimate Ride & Fitness Spin into Masters Week and pay as you go. Experience indo row, real ryder, zumba and spin with the ultimate ride. 3830 Washington Road, Suite 16 706-910-8136 augustaspinningclass.com

Kroc Center Enjoy your leisure time and kick it into high gear, exercising in the heart of downtown Augusta. Take time to burn and learn in the fitness classes and using the cardio machines. Stick around for lunch or dinner at the Kroc Center cafe, open to the community with no pass required. 1833 Broad Street 706-364-5762 krocaugusta.org

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ENTERTAIN

URS Center for the Performing Arts in Aiken. $7$20. Call 803-648-1438 or visit acp1011.com.

Flix

“The Descendants” shows Tuesday, April 10, at 6 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Free. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. Lunch and Learn Poetry Movie Series, featuring “Emily Dickinson: A Life,” is Thursday, April 12, at noon at the Headquarters Branch Library. Participants are invited to bring a lunch. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. “Rio” shows Thursday, April 12, at 5 p.m. at the Harlem Branch Library as part of their Family Movie Night. Call 706-556-9795 or visit ecgrl.org.

Special Events

After Amen Corner: An Augusta Golf Heritage Petersburg Boat Tour is Thursday-Saturday, April 5-7, at 11:30 a.m., 12:30 p.m. and 1:30 p.m. and leaves from the boat ramp at Lake Olmstead. $10. Pre-registration required. Call 706-8230440 or visit augustacanal.com. First Thursday at the Shops in Midtown on Kings Way is Thursday, April 5, from 5-8 p.m. and features food, wine, live music, shopping and more. Call 706-364-8479. Birdies and Bogeys Benefit Party is Thursday, April 5, from 7-10 p.m. at the Julian Smith Casino and features music, drinks, food, silent auctions and more. $50. Visit birdiesandbogeysbenefit.org. Master’s First Night, featuring food, drinks and live entertainment, is Thursday, April 5, from 8 p.m.-midnight at the Boathouse. $40; $70 per couple. Visit http://master1stnight.evenbrite.com.

“Mr. Robot Goes to the Zoo,” a painting by Leonard Porkchop Zimmerman, will be raffled off at the end of the opening of his show, Weather or Not, at Gaar tdensity Gallery on Broad Street Friday, April 6, at 7 p.m. Raffle tickets for the painting are $10. You don’t have to stick around to win, by why wouldn’t you want to, especially when reception snacks include Dum Dums, Smar ties and Skittles. Call 706-466-5166.

Exhibitions

Weather or Not: An Art Exhibit by Leonard Porkchop Zimmerman opens Friday, April 6, at 7 p.m. at Gaartdensity Gallery on Broad Street. One of his paintings will be raffled off and tickets are $10 each. Call 706-466-5166. Window on the West: Views from the American Frontier, an exhibition of more than 60 painting and works on paper from artists including Frederick Remington, Karl Bodmer and John James Audubon, shows at the Morris Museum of Art through July 22. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org. Georgia Artists with Disabilities Juried Art Show shows the month of April at Walton Rehabilitation Health System. Call 706-8265809 or visit wrh.org. Georgia’s Coastal Isles: Landscapes, Plants & Architecture, an exhibition by Ann Marie Dalis, shows at Sacred Heart Cultural Center through April 30. Call 706-826-4700 or visit sacredheartaugusta.org. V. 23 | NO. 14

Fore! Images in Golf Art, featuring 25 paintings, photographs and drawings, shows through April 15 at the Morris Museum of Art. Featured artists include LeRoy Neiman, Will Barnet, Tim Clark and Ray Ellis. Call 706-7247501 or visit themorris.org.

Music

Par Tee at the Park, with performances by Little Big Town, Josh Kelley and Eric Paslay, is Thursday, April 5, at 6 p.m. at Evans Towne Center Park. $20, general admission; $30, VIP. Warren Moon’s Legends of Sports Celebrity Party is afterwards at 9 p.m., and a $250 ticket includes food, cocktails and a ticket to the concert. Call 706312-7192 or visit evanstownecenterpark.com. Moonlight Music Cruise featuring Fred Williams Jazz is Friday, April 6, at 6:30 p.m. at the Augusta Canal. Participants are invited to bring snacks and drinks to the one and a half hour Petersburg Boat cruise. $25. Call 706-823-0440 or visit augustacanal.com. Bernard Thomas and the ASU Student Orchestra

perform Wednesday, April 11, at 7:30 p.m. at Maxwell Theatre. Call 706-737-1453 or 706737-1418 or visit aug.edu. Tim O’Shields: My Story, My Music, My Passion is Thursday, April 12, at 7:30 p.m. at the Imperial Theatre. $16-$26. Call 706-722-8341 or visit imperialtheatre.com. The Augusta Choral Society is offering a $300 scholarship to high school seniors who have contributed their vocal musical talents to the area. The application, due April 14, is available online, as is further criteria. Call 706-826-4713 or visit augustachoralsociety.org.

Literary

Book Signing: “Augusta’s WGAC Radio: The Voice of the Garden City for Seventy Years” is Friday, April 6, from 6-8 p.m. at the Book Tavern downtown. Call 706-729-2416.

Theater

“Twefth Night,” a production of the Aiken Community Playhouse, shows April 6-7, 13-14 and 20-21 at 8 p.m. and April 15 at 3 p.m. at the

First Friday, a night of music, arts, shopping and more in downtown Augusta, is Friday, April 6, from 5-9 p.m. along Broad Street. Visit augustaarts.com. First Friday Inshop Tasting is Friday, April 6, from 5-8 p.m. at Wine World in North Augusta. $5, with a $3 rebate upon purchase of one of the night’s six featured wines. Call 803-279-9522 or visit wineworldsc.com. Behind the Scenes at Redcliffe Plantation on Beech Island is Saturday, April 7, from 9:3011:30 a.m. $18. Call 803-827-1473 or visit southcarolinaparks.com. Easter Sunrise Service is Sunday, April 8, at 7 a.m. at the Jessye Norman Amphitheater downtown. Call 706-821-1754 or visit augustaga.gov. Who We Are and What We Do, a special Alzheimer’s Lunch and Learn Program featuring speaker Kathy Tuckey, program director of the Alzheimer’s Association, is Tuesday, April 10, at noon at the GHSU Alumni Center. Pre-registration by April 9 is required. Call 706-731-9060. The Sinking of the RMS Titanic, part of the Augusta Museum’s Brown Bag History Lecture series, is Wednesday, April 11, at 12:30 p.m. Free for members; $3 for non-members. Participants are invited to bring lunch; the museum will provide beverages. Call 706-722-8454 or visit METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 39

augustamuseum.org. Undercover Artists Show, to benefit Camp To Be Independent, is Thursday, April 12, at 7 p.m. on the lawn of Walton Rehabilitation Health System. More than 100 local artists, community leaders and celebrities have donated artwork to the event, and these works will be offered at silent auction anonymously. $50. Call 706-826-5809 or email alsalley@wrh.org. Saturday Market at the River is each Saturday from 8 a.m.-2 p.m. at the 8th Street Bulkhead downtown and features produce, food, crafts, music and more. Call 706-627-0128 or visit theaugustamarket.com. Weekly Wine Tastings at Vineyard Wine Market in Evans are each Friday from 4:30-6:30 p.m. and each Saturday from 1-6 p.m. Call 706-922-9463 or visit vine11.com.

Support

Amputee Support Group meets Thursday, April 5, at noon at Walton Rehab. Call 706-823-8504 or visit wrh.org. Pink Magnolias Breast Cancer Support Group meets Monday, April 9, at 6:30 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-774-4141 or visit universityhealth.org. Men’s Breast Cancer Support Group meets Monday, April 9, at 7 p.m. at University Hospital’s Breast Health Center. Call 706-774-4141 or visit universityhealth.org. Let’s Talk Cancer Support Group meets Tuesday, April 10, at 5:30 p.m. at GHSU’s Cancer Center. Call 706-721-0550 or visit georgiahealth.org. OB-GYN Cancer Support Group meets Tuesday, April 10, at 7 p.m. at University Hospital. Call 706-821-2944 or visit universityhealth.org. ALS Support Lunch and Learn is Thursday, April 12, at 11 a.m. at the GHSU Medical Office Building. Pre-registration required. Call 706-7212681 or visit georgiahealth.org. Breast Cancer Support Group is Thursday, April 12, at 5:30 p.m. at the GHSU Cancer Center. Call 706-721-4109 or visit georgiahealth.org. Cancer Survivor Support Group meets Thursday, April 12, at 6 p.m. at Augusta Oncology Associates. Call 706-651-2283 or visit doctorshospital.net. Brain Injury Support Group meets Thursday, April 12, at 6 p.m. at NeuroRestorative Georgia. Call 706-829-0370 or visit wrh.org. Narcotics Anonymous, sponsored by Trinity Hospital of Augusta, meets Fridays and Sundays at 7:30 p.m. Call 706-855-2419 or visit trinityofaugusta.com.

Sports-Outdoors

Swamp Saturday, in which volunteers lead a free 2.5 mile, 1.5 hour hike through the Phinizy Swamp Nature Park, is Saturday, April 7, at 9:30 a.m. Call 706-828-2109 or visit naturalsciencesacademy.org. Adaptive Golf Clinic, for those with life-changing

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illnesses and injuries who want to learn to play, is Tuesday, April 10, at 10 a.m. at First Tee of Augusta. Pre-registration required. Call 706826-5809 or email alsalley@wrh.org. The Augusta GreenJackets play the Savannah Sand Gnats Thursday, April 12, at 7:35 p.m., Friday-Saturday, April 13-14, at 7:05 p.m., and Sunday, April 15, at 2:05 p.m. at Lake Olmstead Stadium. $7-$11. Call 706-736-7889 or visit greenjacketsbaseball.com. Wheelchair Tennis is each Monday at 6 p.m., weather permitting, at the Club at Rae’s Creek. Free and open to the public. Call 706-826-5809 or visit alsalley@wrh.org. Augusta Canal Boat Tours lasting one hour are offered Monday-Saturday at 10 a.m., 11:30 a.m., 1:30 p.m. and 3 p.m., and Sunday at 1:30, 3 and 4:30 p.m. All tours include admission to the Augusta Canal Interpretive Center. Call 706-8230440 or visit augustacanal.com. The Augusta Fencers Club is open five nights a week from 5:30-9 p.m. and most Saturday mornings from 10 a.m.-noon. Visitors always welcome. Call 706-722-8878. Thursday Night Chain Reaction Ride begins at 6 p.m. each Thursday at Patriots Park in Grovetown. For intermediate to fast-paced cyclists, who average 25-32 miles. Participants should bring their own water and helmet. Call 706-855-2024 or visit chainreactionbicycles.net. Riverview Disc Golf League meets each Thursday at 6 p.m. at Riverview Park in North Augusta. $5 entry fee and $1 ace pool. Call 803-215-8181 or visit augustadiscgolf.com. Road Bike Ride meets each Thursday at 6:30 p.m. at Andy Jordan’s Bicycle Warehouse downtown for an approximately 25-mile ride at a moderate to fast pace. Front and rear lights, as well as a helmet, are required. Call 706-7246777 or visit andyjordans.com. Saturday Historic Trolley Tours are Saturdays from 1-4:15 p.m. at the Augusta Museum of History. Reservations required 24 hours in advance. $12. Call 706-724-4067 or visit augustamuseum.org. Nacho Mama’s Group Run is each Wednesday at 5:30 p.m. and features food and drinks afterwards. Three- and four-mile routes are available for all ages and abilities of runners. Call 706-414-4059 or email jim@ enduranceconcepts.com. Hott Shott Disc Golf is each Wednesday at 7 p.m. at Killer B Disc Golf, 863 Broad Street, and features games and prizes for all ages and skill levels. $2. Call 706-814-7514 or visit killerbdiscgolf.blogspot.com/p/hott-shott.

Kids

Spring Break Movies at the Nancy Carson Library in North Augusta on Thursday, April 5, include children’s titles showing at 10:30 a.m. and 4 p.m. Call 803-279-5767 or visit abbe-lib.org. Fun with Folktales, a program for children of all ages presented by the youth wing of the Aiken Community Playhouse, is Thursday, April 5, at 11 V. 23 | NO. 14

a.m. at the Aiken Public Library. Call 803-6422023 or visit abbe-lib.org.

Pre-registration required. Call 706-724-7501 or visit themorris.org.

Young Adult Craft Day is Thursday, April 5, at 2 p.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library and participants will make braided bead necklaces, bookmarks and picture frames. Pre-registration required. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org.

Rhyming Story Time at the Diamond Lakes Branch Library is Thursday, April 12, at 10 a.m. Pre-registration required. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org.

Easter Egg Hunt is Saturday, April 7, from 10 a.m.-noon at the Appleby Branch Library. Call 706-736-6244 or visit ecgrl.org. Book Swap and Flower Pots, a special story time in which participants will bring a used book to swap, as well as decorate a flower pot and plant a seed, is Tuesday, April 10, at 10 a.m. at the Headquarters Branch Library. Call 706-8212600 or visit ecgrl.org. Jazz for Kids, featuring the book “When Louis Armstrong Taught Me Scat,” is Tuesday, April 10, at 10 a.m. at the Friedman Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Money Management for Kids, for those ages 8-11, is Wednesday, April 11, at 1 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. Call 706-863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org. What’s in the Box? Fun with Photos, a program for toddlers and their caretakers in which participants learn about cameras and photos then do a craft project, is Thursday, April 12, at 10 a.m. or 11:15 a.m. at the Morris Museum of Art. Free for members; $4 for non-members.

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Poetry Workshop for Teens is Thursday, April 12, at 4 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org. Money Management for Kids is Thursday, April 12, at 5 p.m. at the Columbia County Library. For ages 8-11. Call 706-863-1946 or visit ecgrl.org. To the Moon and Beyond shows Saturdays in April at 7 and 8 p.m. at the DuPont Planetarium in Aiken. $5.50, adults; $4.50, seniors; $3.50, 4K-12 students; $1, USC-A students, faculty and staff. Call 803-641-3654 or visit http://rspec. usca.edu/planetarium. Spring Fling at Graystone Ranch Wildlife Education Center in Hephzibah continues through April 30 and is open Saturdays from 10 a.m.-one hour after dark and Sundays from noon-one hour after dark. It is also open weekdays by appointment. Visits include hiking trails, lakes, exotic animal tours, a petting zoo, hayrides, boat rides and more. Easter egg hunts and photos with the Easter bunny are available through Easter. $10, with children receiving half off with one paying adult. Visit graystoneranch.com. Preschool Story Time is every Tuesday at

Headquarters Branch Library at 10 a.m. Toddler Story Time is every Wednesday at 10 a.m. Group registration required. Call 706-821-2600 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Tuesday at 10 a.m. at Diamond Lakes Branch Library. Groups of six or more must pre-register. Call 706-772-2432 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Tuesday at 10 a.m. at Friedman Branch Library. Groups of six or more must pre-register. Call 706-736-6758 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Wednesday at 10 a.m. at Maxwell Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-793-2020 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Wednesday from 10-11:15 a.m. at Wallace Branch Library. Pre-registration required. Call 706-722-6275 or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Tuesday at 10:30 a.m. at Harlem Branch Library. Call 706-556-9795 or visit ecgrl.org.

or visit ecgrl.org. Story Time is every Wednesday from 10:1510:45 a.m. for Pre-K, and 11:30-11:55 a.m. for toddlers at Aiken County Public Library. Call 803-642-2023 or visit abbe-lib.org. Story Time is every Wednesday from 10:30-11 a.m. for toddlers and 11:15-11:45 a.m. for preschoolers at North Augusta Branch Library. Call 803-279-5767 or abbe-lib.org.

Hobbies

Augusta During the Civil War, presented by speaker Tom Sutherland, is a free monthly program from the Augusta Genealogical Society that is Thursday, April 12, at 3 p.m. at the Augusta Museum of History. Call Daphne Hopson at 706-854-8685 or email her at dhopson@aol.com.

If you would like to see your organization’s events listed in our calendar, please email Amy Christian at amy@themetrospirit.com. The deadline for each Thursday’s issue is the previous Friday at noon.

Wacky Wednesday Story Time is each Wednesday at 10 a.m. in the children’s department of Barnes and Noble in the Augusta Mall. Call 706737-0012 or visit bn.com. Story Time is every Wednesday at Appleby Branch Library from 10:05-10:20 a.m. for toddlers 18 months-35 months, and from 10:3011:15 a.m. for preschoolers ages 3 and up. Parent must stay with child. Call 706-736-6244

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 41

Thursday, April 5 Live Music

Cotton Patch - Old Man Crazy Country Club - Swinging Medallions Crazy Turks - Playback The Band Evans Towne Center Park - Par Tee @ the Park w/ Little Big Town, Josh Kelley, Eric Paslay French Market Grille West - Doc Easton Smooth Jazz Joe’s Underground - Ruskin Yeargain Julian Smith Casino - Birdies and Bogeys Benefit w/ Mellow-D Band and DJ L Smash Laura’s Backyard Tavern - David Hope Malibu Jacks - Ke- Ju O Lounge - Jazmine Soul Band Red Pepper Cafe - Funk/Fusion Jazz Rose Hill Stables - Preston, Weston and Sandra Sky City - Funk You w/ The Favors Somewhere In Augusta - Jim Perkins (patio) and Joe Stevenson Trio (party pavilion) Surrey Tavern - Tony Williams and the Blues Express Travinia’s - Smooth Jazz The Willcox - Classic Jazz

Wild Wing - Almost Famous (inside) and The Endalls (outside)

What’s Tonight?

Casa Blanca - Thursday Tango Club Argos - Karaoke Cocktails Lounge - Karaoke Coyote’s - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Soup, Suds & Conversations Helga’s Pub & Grille - Trivia The Highlander - Butt Naked Trivia The Library - DJ Kris Fisher The Loft - Karaoke The Playground - Open Mike Malibu Jack’s - Sports Trivia with Mike Thomas Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Evans) - Karaoke The Playground - Open Mic with Brandy Shannon’s - Karaoke Somewhere in Augusta - Keno, Poker Soul Bar - Boom Box Villa Europa - Karaoke Wooden Barrel - ’80s Night Karaoke

Friday, April 6 Live Music

Augusta Moonlight Music Cruise - Fred Williams Jazz Carolina Ale House - Jim Perkins Cotton Patch - Jam Sandwich Country Club - Ross Coppley Coyote’s - Amy Taylor Crazy Turks - Playback The Band The First Round - Granny’s Gin French Market Grille West - Doc Easton Joe’s Underground - Cocoa Dylan Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Allen & Larry Malibu Jack’s - Tony Williams Blues Express PI Bar & Grill - Jazz Duo Sector 7G - Negative 9000, DJs Number5, LinearNorth, Polyphase Shannon’s - The BTUs Somewhere in Augusta - Dave Firmin (patio) and Jar (party pavilion) Stillwater Taproom - Galen Kipar Project Surrey Tavern - Playback The Band featuring Tutu Dyvine Wild Wing - The GoodTimes Band (inside) and

Moby Dick (outside)

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Variety Show Cocktails Lounge - Grown-Up Fridays with DJ Cork and Bull Pub - Karaoke Eagle’s Nest - Free Salsa Lessons; Latin Dance Party First Round - DJ Kris Fisher Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Iron Horse Bar & Grill - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke with Ryan Moseley Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke with Jeff Barnes Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Three J’s Karaoke Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke Palmetto Tavern - DJ Tim Rebeck’s Hideaway - Open Mic Roadrunner Cafe - Karaoke with Steve Chappel Sky City - First Friday ’80s Night Soul Bar - DJ Mix Tropicabana - Latin Friday Wheels - Live DJ Wooden Barrel - Karaoke Contest

Saturday, April 7 Live Music

1102 - Matt Kabus The Acoustic Coffeehouse - Open Acoustic Jam Session with Eryn Eubanks and the Family Fold Augusta Market at the River - Karen Gordon Cotton Patch - Riley Williams Country Club - Gary Ray Coyote’s - Amy Taylor Crazy Turks - Playback The Band Joe’s Underground - BeerLover featuring Jeff Johnston & Tim Arbisi Laura’s Backyard Tavern - David Hope Malibu Jack’s - Tony Williams Blues Express P.I. Bar and Grill - Smooth Jazz Shannon’s - Tony Williams Sky City - Yacht Rock Schooner Somewhere in Augusta - Ruskin Yeargain (patio) and The Unmentionables (party pavilion) Stillwater Taproom - Galen Kipar Project Surrey Tavern - Playback The Band featuring Tutu Dyvine Wild Wing - Tokyo Joe (inside) and Simplified (outside)

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Variety Show Cocktails Lounge - Latin Night Fishbowl Lounge - Karaoke Fox’s Lair - Karaoke Helga’s Pub & Grille - Trivia Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane The Loft - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke with Rockin Rob Mi Rancho (Clearwater) - Karaoke with Danny Haywood Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke Ms. Carolyn’s - Karaoke One Hundred Laurens - DJ Kenny Ray Robbie’s - Saturday Night Dance Party Tropicabana - Salsa Saturday Wheels - Live DJ Wooden Barrel - Kamikaze Karaoke

Sunday, April 8 Live Music

5 O’Clock Bistro - Buzz and Candice Crazy Turk’s - Playback The Band Casa Blanca Cafe - Joel Cruz & the Young Lions Iron Horse Bar and Grill - John Berret’s LaRoxes Malibu Jack’s - Live Entertainment Shannon’s - The BTUs Somewhere in Augusta - The Unmentionables Wild Wing - Erik Smallwood The Willcox - Jazz Jam Session

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What’s Tonight?

Caribbean Soul - Love Jones Sundays Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke, Salsa Dancing

Monday, April 9 Live Music

The Playground - Stillview, Daybreak Embrace Shannon’s - Brandon Bower Band

What’s Tonight?

Applebee’s (Evans) - Trivia Club Argos - Karaoke The Library - Local Appreciation Night Malibu Jack’s - Sports Trivia with Mike Thomas Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Trivia with Mike Thomas Somewhere In Augusta - Free Poker Tournaments Wild Wing - Trivia

Tuesday, April 10 Live Music

The Highlander - Open Mic Night Wild Wing - Keith Gregory The Willcox - Piano Jazz

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Karaoke Fishbowl Lounge - Dart League Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane Malibu Jack’s - DJ Somewhere In Augusta - Big Prize Trivia & Hawk Talk

Wednesday, April 11 Live Music

Joe’s Underground - Kathleen Turner Overdrive Soul Bar - Koko Beware, Black Moon, Num Nums

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Wild Wing - Tiki Barflys

What’s Tonight?

Club Argos - Santoni’s Satin Dolls Cocktails Lounge - Augusta’s Got Talent Cotton Patch - Trivia and Tunes Coyote’s - Drink N Drown w/ Snow Bunny Bikini Contest Hotel Aiken - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell Laura’s Backyard Tavern - Karaoke w/ David Doane The Loft - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Downtown) - Karaoke Mi Rancho (Washington Road) - Karaoke with Rockin’ Rob The Playground - Krazy Karaoke with Big Troy Polo Tavern - Karaoke w/ Tom Mitchell

Upcoming

Dave Firmin - Joe’s Underground April 12 Tim O Shields, My Story - My Music- My Passion Imperial Theatre - April 12 Charles playin Acoustic - Surrey Tavern April 12 Kung Fu Dynamite - 1102 April 13 Joe Stevenson - Augusta Moonlight Music Cruise April 13 Steven Bryant - Cotton Patch April 13 The Mass Chaos Tour w/ Godsmack and Staind James Brown Arena April 13 Riley Williams - Laura’s Backyard Tavern Groove Stain - The Loft April 13 The Vicky Grady Band - Iron Horse Bar and Grill April 14 Hoze’s - John Berret’s LaRoxes April 14 Thomas Hardy and The Outfit - Morris Museum of Art April 15 Liz Bramlett & Steven Bryant - Manuel’s Bread Cafe April 18 Banned in Two States - The Playground April 20 Connor Pledger - Carolina Ale House April 20 Jubee & The Morning After w/ Artemia, The Radar

Cinema, Fdurty - Aky City April 20 The Sounthern Meltdown Band - Sweet Dreamin’ April 20 The Southern Meltdown Band - Shannon’s April 27 She N She - Fox’s Lair April 28 the John King Band - Iron Horse Bar and Grill April 29 Jim Perkins - Carolina Ale House May 4 John Berret’s LaRoxes - Iron Horse Bar and Grill May 5 Saving Able & Black Stone Cherry - Cotoye’s May 6 Siamese Dream - The Playground May 11 Jim Perkins - Carolina Ale House May 11 Dash Rip Rock - Metro Coffeehouse & Pub May 12 Lady Antebellum - James Brown Arena May 22-23 Morris Davidson Band - 1102 May 25 Jim Perkins - Carolina Ale House May 25 The Southern Meltdown Band - Shannon’s May 25 An Evening with Yanni - Bell Auditorium June 1 The Mosier Brothers - Surrey Tavern June 1 & 2 John Berret’s LaRoxes - Iron Horse Bar and Grill June 3 John Berret’s LaRoxes - 1102 June 16 Ten Toes Up - Surrey Tavern June 23 Fresh Music Festival w/ Keith Sweat, Doug E. Fresh, Guy, SWV, K-Ci, & JoJo- James Brown Arena June 29 John Berret’s LaRoxes - 1102 July 6 Hot Rod Walt and the Psycho-DeVilles - The Loft July 20 John Berret’s LaRoxes - Iron Horse Bar and Grill July 22 John Berret’s LaRoxes - 1102 July 27

Lullwater - Vinyl, Atlanta April 7 Sounds From The Underground - Elliot St Pub, Atlanta April 9 Miss Used - Peachtree Tavern, Atlanta April 11 Jim Perkins - Butt Hutt BBQ, Athens April 12 South Jordan - Armstrong Atlantic State University, Savannah April 12 Australian Chamber Orchestra - Emerson Symphony Hall, Atlanta April 12 Adrienne Haan - Fox Theatre, Atlanta April 13 Jim Perkins - Gnat’s Landing, Athens April 21 Drive-By Truckers - Tabernacle, Atlanta April 21 The Polish Ambassador - Live Wire Music Hall & Cafe, Savannah April 21 Diecast - The Wormhole Music Venue, Savannah May 2 Brian Regan - Johhny Mercer Theatre, Savannah May 3 Trace Adkins - Johhny Mercer Theatre, Savannah May 4

Elsewhere

Earphunk, Georgia Soul Council, Cherry Royoale The Five Spot, Atlanta April 6 Van Hunt - The Earl, Atlanta April 6 Martin Sexton - Variety Playhouse, Atlanta April 6 PJ Morton - The Buckhead Theatre, Atlanta April 7 Delta Spirit - The Masquerade, Atlanta April 7

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 43

IN MUSIC

Bands Show Up, Even After Masters Week

Ahhh, Masters traffic! Remember your pills. The invasion of Augusta has begun and it has ramped up the talent pool in Augusta. This weekend will be one of the busiest that this city will see all year. Bands are everywhere. I ventured out last weekend to see if the insanity started early, but, to my dismay, it hadn’t kicked in yet. This weekend will be another story. Washington Road will be rather busy. And advice time: don’t drink and die. That might ruin your Masters Week. Luckily, I’m friends with a lot of musicians around town. And since I can’t list everything that’s going on this weekend (there’s another part of the paper for that), here’s some stuff that my friends are doing, according to Facebook. The Atom Blonde will be at The Playground on Friday night. I’m friends with the CoCo, so this one counts, too: Yacht Rock Schooner will be at Sky City on Saturday night. If anything, there are always good shows at Hooters on Masters Week. But that’s a different kind of show all together. I’m talking about boobs here. Let’s get to some headlines. When I read this, I think they thought it was bad news, but I consider it great news. It appears that Fred Durst of Limp Bizkit is set to fire two of the original members of the band. According to TMZ, which seems reliable, Durst has a “new vision” for the band. When I said this was good news, it’s good

44 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

news for DJ Lethal and drummer John Otto. These are the two that will be fired and not put through the pain of being in a recording studio with Fred Durst. The induction ceremony for the Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall of Fame is right around the corner, but I think we are going to miss out on what would have been an awesome reunion. Guns N’ Roses are set to be inducted and, according to Slash, “I would love to f***ing play, but it’s just something that’s not gonna happen.” As of right now, it’s unclear whether guitarist Izzy Stradlin or Axl Rose will be present at all. The show is on April 14, and will be shown on HBO next month. Sure, we may miss out on a Guns N’ Roses reunion, but no need to worry, there’s one reunion that is happening this summer that will be awesome. Of course, I’m referring to the 98 Degrees reunion! This means I can finally show Augusta my 98 Degrees tribute band, 36 Degrees Celsius. Enjoy. Next week is when the tourists leave and bands show up. On Wednesday, Theory of a Deadman and Pop Evil will be at The Country Club. This show will be awesome. It only gets bigger. Two days later, two of the biggest rock acts out today will be at the James Brown Arena: Godsmack and Staind. Along with Halestorm, this show will be the biggest rock concert that Augusta has seen in years. The bands are kicking off the Mass Chaos tour right here in Augusta. Not Atlanta, not Charlotte, right here in Augusta. I wouldn’t wait to walk up and buy tickets on these shows, otherwise you may be sitting in the parking lot. The only plus is that the beer is a whole lot cheaper outside of the James Brown Arena. What shows are coming up? What venues do I need to check out? Where else can I eat egg salad sandwiches? Email matt@themetrospirit.com.

MATTSTONE can be heard weekdays from 2-6 p.m. on 95 Rock.

V. 23 | NO. 14

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 45

ON THE BALL Hello, Friends Tiger is human after all

MATTLANE is host of The Weekend Rundown which airs from 10 a.m.-noon Saturdays on News-Talk-Sports 1630 AM. He can be reached at mattlane28@gmail.com or follow him on Twitter @Mattlane28. “This is my 18th year, so I’ve just spent about half my life playing this tournament.” Yet he still shows up early, stays late and makes every extra practice shot count. Like he’s cramming for some test that he’ll never actually take. Tiger Woods has always stood alone in figuring out ways to visualize the carrot dangling at the end of his Nike cap. But while all that practice and determination used to be romanticized as something we should all aspire to do and become — as if mustering ourselves off the couch to work out three times a week could be classified as something remotely close to driven — it now has us ducking and shaking our heads like when you find out something was too good to be true. Because it was. Nobody is immortal, nor bulletproof. Life has a grand way of equalizing us when we decide to put all of our eggs in one basket. It’s one giant sliding scale that’s inescapable, and that’s a good thing. What we’re left with is a Tiger that is

more cordial, more accessible and more quotable than he’s ever been. It seems like forever — and, by his standards it has been — since he’s entered Augusta on such a high note. One nugget that often gets overlooked is the opening press conference from Tiger every year. Nowhere else does he look so humbled and thankful to be in a large room full of reporters and writers that at one time narrowed their sights and fired on him at will. They took years worth of pent-up vitriol, cold stares and turned down interview requests to unleash that atom bomb in order to make sure he felt what it feels like to be human. Even if just for once. Although while on the podium Woods seems unfettered, rising to the occasion as only he could, paying the proper respect to those who came before his time. He knows this tournament is bigger than anything he could ever accomplish, no matter how many times he wins it. And that’s why he takes time off during that silly tournament in Houston the week before the Masters. To practice. To sharpen. To play the same course over and over again. Because more than he needs the extra practice, there is something about this place that grounds him and lets him get back to that joy for the game that he experienced as a boy, working on his short game with his father. It’s one of the few times we get to see the human Tiger, no matter how robotic his records are. It’s Augusta.

make a real connection Call Livelinks. The hottest place to meet the coolest people.

706.434.0108

46 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Local Numbers: 1.800.926.6000 Ahora en Español 18+ www.livelinks.com

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METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 47

SPONSOR THE

Metro Spirit’s Pet Page! lauren@themetrospirit.com

Hippity, Hoppity, Easter’s on Its Way By LeAnne Marlette

Spring has sprung here in the CSRA and one of the clearest signs is the springing around of wild cottontail rabbits. You may even have seen one in your own yard.

In most cases, if you have seen a wild cottontail, chances are there is a nest nearby. As people are out doing yardwork and planting gardens, there is the chance of running across a nest. When people find a nest of wild cottontails in their yard, it will appear as if the mother has abandoned it. That is not true! A mother rabbit only nurses her litter once a day. Typically they nurse early in the morning or at sunset. She only stays with her nest long enough to nurse, then she will leave so that she does not draw the attention of predators to the nest. If you come across a nest while gardening or doing other yardwork, you should leave it alone. If you disturb it by accident, replace it as best as you can. There is a good chance the mother is close by watching. She will still care for the babies. If you find a cottontail outside of the nest or if your animal brings you one, try to find the nest and put it back. If you cannot find the nest or if the cottontail is injured, you will need to call a

wildlife rehabilitator. Cottontails are very hard to rehabilitate. Please do not try if you are not experienced. There is no way to turn a wild cottontail into a domesticated pet. At five weeks of age, the natural instinct kicks in and they must be turned back into the wild. If you try to keep one caged, they will stop thriving and they will bite. So, if you come across a wild cottontail and cannot find the nest, you come across one that has been injured or if one of your pets brings you one as a “present,” here are a few steps you can take to ensure it has the best chance for survival. Do not feed the cottontail cow’s milk… it will kill it! The safest thing for them is kitten milk replacement formula. This can be purchased at any pet store and most grocery stores. Follow the directions on the container and feed using an eyedropper or syringe. A baby rabbit cannot maintain its body temperature so it will need to be kept warm by placing it on a towel with a heating pad underneath set to low. Last, call a wildlife rehabilitator. Most local veterinarians have one on staff or can refer you to one in the area. If you should have difficulty locating a rehabilitator, you can email me at fortheloveofbunnies@comcast.net. If you are interested in adopting a domestic bunny, For the Love of Bunnies Rescue will be hosting an adoption event on Saturday and Sunday, April 14-15, at the Petco in Evans. If you are on Facebook, check us out at For the Love of Bunnies Rescue and be sure to “Like” us! You can also see picture of bunnies available for adoption on our Facebook page.

Special Events For the Love of Bunnies Adoption Event Saturday-Sunday, April 14-15 Petco, Evans fortheloveofbunnies@comcast.net Village Deli and Friends Annual Charity Golf Tournament A fundraising event for That’s What Friends Are For, Inc., a 501c3 that raises money for local rescues, spay and neuter, and much more. Sunday, May 20, 1:30 p.m. tee time Goshen Plantation Golf Club To register, donate or get more information, call Village Deli at 706-736-3691 or visit thatswhatfriendsarefor.org

Ongoing Adoption Events PETCO 4209 Washington Road, Evans Saturdays, 11 a.m.-4 p.m., Sundays, 1-4 p.m. PetSmart 225 Robert C. Daniel Parkway, Augusta Saturdays, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Tractor Supply 596 Bobby Jones Expressway, next to Sam’s Club Saturdays and Sundays from 1-4 p.m.

Local Animal Rescue Organizations AARF volunteers@aarf.net

Columbia Co. Animal Services 706-541-4077

Augusta Humane Society 706-736-0186

CSRA Chihuahua Rescue 706-825-8090, 706-763-8071

Augusta-Richmond Co. Animal Services 706-790-6836

CSRA Humane Society 706-261-7387 csrshumanesociety.org

Boston Terrier Rescue of South Carolina 706-726-2221 or 803-279-8069 bostonrescueofsc.org

48 METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12

Feathered Friends Forever 706-556-2424 featheredfriendsforever.org

Girard Life Saver 706-871-8273, 478-569-9209 samantha@girard-lifesaver.org

Long Dog Rescue 706-854-8646 bmeismer@comcast.net

Graced Kennels 706-738-7168

Old Fella Burke County 888-846-3792 oldfella.org

Happy Tails 706-955-0438, 706-836-2708 csrahappytails@gmail.com Heartsong 706-855-1241 heartsongent@hotmail.com

STARS 706-592-4158 starsrescue.org Washington-Wilkes Humane 706-678-2287

Fundraising Organizations for Local Rescue and Spay/Neuter Efforts PawPrints Foundation 706-863-2067 pawprintsfoundation.org That’s What Friends Are For, Inc. c/o The Village Deli 706-736-3691 thatswhatfriendsarefor.org Diamonds in the Ruff, Evans diamondsintheruffcsra.org

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k e e W s r e Mast ®

at the Wing.

Live Music Lineup

When the sun goes down on the National, the night lights up at the wing! Par 3 Wednesday Outside Stage

Michael Patterson Inside Stage

Friday Night 4.6 Outside Stage

Moby Dick Inside Stage

Electric Boogaloo

The Good Times Band

Thirsty Thursday 4.5

Saturday 4.7

Outside Stage

Simplified Outside Stage Tokyo Joe Inside Stage

The Endalls Inside Stage

Almost Famous Classic Rock Set

Final Round Sunday 4.8 Post Masters® Bash

Erik Smallwood

ILD

WING

TA AUGUS IA GEORG

HOT WINGS. COLD BEER. GOOD TIMES! Washington Road just past I-20 • 706-364-WILD (9453) • www.wildwingcafe.com V. 23 | NO. 14

METRO SPIRIT 04.05.12 49

WHINE

LINE

OK, now I see why my witty observation about the ice on the azaleas and ALL other wines were not in the March 28 issue for fear up offending those high falootin’ folk out there at the National. Jeesh, grow a spine. This Martin/Zimmerman deal is a sad situation. I think that there were several things that were handled wrong. But apparently the bottom line is- only one person broke the law. What is with the proliferation of DJ’s downtown on Saturday nights? It’s time to bring back more live music! ATTENTION South Carolina drivers when you come to Georgia please pick up the speed and stay of the phone cause apparently y’all can not multitask. Y’all drive 15 mph below the speed limit while on your phone in the passing lane. Im never surprised when i see s.c. plates when traffic is backed up. Waaahhh, why no whines pre-Masters week? Cat got your whines? Hey, Welcome to Augusta, folks! Be sure to visit downtown for Broad Street and blocks beyond. We have good stores and restaurants! Isn’t it funny how gobs of people rush out to play the lottery when it reaches half a billion bucks, like it’s not worth the same effort when it’s only a hundred million. Kickass. Your best issue to date! No whine line for the Masters week edition. We all know why, but that’s kind of a snub to your regular readers, a.k.a. the reason your paper stays alive.

I noticed that you omitted the ‘Whine Line’ from your ‘Masters edition’. I thought the Metro Spirit would be the one publication we could count on to lift the cheap facade that Augusta puts on during Masters week to expose to outsiders the city that Augusta really is. Why is it not mentioned that the “stand your ground law” makes George Zimmerman a murderer. Once Zimmerman got out of his car and approached Trayvon with a gun, Trayvon had every right according to the “stand your ground law” to fight with Zimmerman for his life. So no matter if Trayvon was beating his ass or not at the time of the shooting, Zimmerman is the one on the wrong side of the law. He is a murderer by definition of the law, and should be sentenced according to Florida State law regarding the murder of a minor; which usually results in the death penalty in the Sunshine State.

DECLASSIFIED

I want to read the Metro Spirit and when I encounter empty box after

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WHINELINE@THEMETROSPIRIT.COM

Have something you want to get off your chest? Send your whines to whineline@themetrospirit. com. If you do so by noon on Friday, you might just see it in the next Thursday’s issue. Oh, and whines may be edited for content but will pretty much be printed exactly as you type them.

empty box, I get frustrated! Wish I could read every page of the current issue online! Why is there not a place in Augusta where you can drink and paint a picture that you can take home? They have such places in Athens and Atlanta. Why not here? Where are all of our artsy entrepreneurs?! Santorum said God tells him things. Santorum noted last week he’d rather support Obama for another four years than Romney. So did God tell Santorum to diss Romney? How cool! Go Prez!!! Hey what a great Saturday Market for a start. Sure the rains seemed to have scared off some vendors for the latter part of the day, but I like what I found down there around noon. New food booth of Middle Eastern foods, fresh strawberries, new totes and bags galore, and new homemade soaps! I did miss Manuel and his breads, especially my favorite blue cheese or tomato breads! Please come back! Hey folks, do you remember the folksy country song of “Ricochet Romance?” Use the tune for the following song for Ricochet Romney: I knew the day I met you, you had a roaming brain, I thought that I could trust you, what a fool I was to try, as long as you were faithful, to the good ole USA, but as soon as you campaign, you began to ricochet, so Romney, I don’t want no ricochet campaign, I don’t want your ricochet talk, if you talk out two sides of your mouth, why don’t you just shut it up, don’t tell us you don’t like the health care, which is what you did, I don’t want no ricochet Romney, let’s set his Cayman monies free, I don’t want no ricochet Romney, let’s set his Cayman monies freeeeeee ... News Flash! All of the following examples are grammatically incorrect: “Your welcome.” “I beg you’re pardon.” “Why don’t you join she and I for lunch?” “Her and me went to the mall.” “We had already went to lunch.” “Call my secretary or myself.” By the way, neither “escape” nor “especially” nor “ask” contain the letter “x”... There is no “n” in the name “Padgett”... Finally, it’s “I COULDN’T care less” and-- “irregardless” is a totally useless double-negative word ignorantly substituted for “regardless”. I’m trying to figure out what made that second atheist so mad. Exactly what was he bitching about? I guess he’s just not a happy person. I wonder why. He sure does have a sharp tongue though. Wonder who else has a sharp tongue. Maybe.....SATIN!!! I’m not sure what this Mad Men tv series is about, but I’m going to watch it anyway so I can gaze at Christina Hendrickson. Wow, what a womanly woman. Why can’t all women look like her? Why doesn’t sponge Neil square hands take a class in telephone

operation So that the chicken hawk can answer legal questions ..... His constant stammering and phone malfunctions are killing my Sunday night buzz Wow! I’ll bet those nursery nerds at the National are going nuts trying to keep all those beautiful azaleas from blooming before the Masters. Don’t you know those ice machines are doing some serious overtime until then. Yuk,yuk,yuk. Don’t worry, there’s no such thing as global warming, those rich guys out there have got it all under control....... I love watching someone in a grocery store pay with food stamps then step over to the customer service counter and spend twenty bucks on the lottery. So our mall will not let a small perfectly behaved church group do a scavenger hunt that ends with us all eating there and shopping but will allow these groups of thugs to basically own the mall on friday & saturday nights with no opposition? Augusta Mall let me introduce you to Regency Mall oh wait it does not exist. Oh my gah. I remember when the ads in Metro Spirit were worth a crap. Please, for the love of Pee-wee Herman hire somebody who knows what they are doing (creatively and a sales person who would actually offer up a piece of advice on what to display). These text-filled, poorly executed blocks of trash are a big distraction. This is a whine to local musicians.Isnt our local music scene far enough down the toilet that we dont need any extra static. Well let me inform you local musicians that we have a new buzzard on the roost. There are a group of individuals (out of towners)that are trying to take over our local music scene.If you are booking gigs downtown,beware of certain INDIVIDUALS who are trying to get you to sign papers(personal info) before you play an open mic nite,talent nite,karaoke.Let me inform our (out of towners) who are trying to hijack our local music scene. DONT PULL THAT BS WITH AUGUSTA’S LOCAL MUSICIANS,WE ARE HIP TO YOUR SHAM!It’s bad enough Augusta Musicians cant get a fair paying consistent gig! Will someone send me the transcript of conservatives railing against FOXNews’ Greta VanSustern when she spent almost a full year covering the disappearance of Natalie Holloway almost every night? I didn’t hear people telling that mother to be patient and let things work themselves out. If that mother had not advocated for her daughter, we might not know what we learned about the man who was eventually sent to jail for an unrelated murder of another young woman. The police should have been the first advocate for justice for Trayvon Martin’s family. They only turned to the media and others to help get their story out when it became clear that they could not depend on law enforcement. And who can blame them?

All declassified ads are Cash in Advance (credit card payment required) and are $40 per week. Visit metrospirit.com to place your ad in minutes. V. 23 | NO. 14

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