Green-laning - A week in the life...

It was February 1/2 term, and instead of whisking Muddy Madam away for a romantic holiday, I had ‘work’ to do.

It began on Tuesday as I had a Ford SUV media event to attend down in Chesterfield, at the rather lovely Peak Edge Hotel. Regular readers will know that if I’m away on this type of event, and I’m driving Deux Smurf, I always like to check GLASS’s TrailWise 2 for any local green lanes to drive.

I found a number of lanes that looked interesting, so with the event due to begin at 10.30am, I left Muddy Towers at around 6.30am for the 2 hour drive with a bit of time in hand to spend exploring.

Lane 1

Flash Lane (SK2966-02) was a bit of a mess if I’m being honest, a mixture of hard dirt and broken tarmac with plenty of off-piste activity and fly tipping. It appeared to be a common spot for dog walkers and camper vans, the only hazards are deep potholes and the odd fridge. It looked good as a backdrop for photos, but I wouldn’t go out of my way to drive it again.

Lane 2

Just a short distance away was SK2668-03, which is also known as Beeley Hill I believe.

According to TW2 reports it can be quite busy with other user groups at times, but at 8.30am I was all alone. Some repair work was evident where water erosion had caused deep gullies, but there were still a few sections that flexed Deux Smurf’s suspension.

2

Heading east to west, once you emerge from the trees, the views to the left are quite stunning, and from here on the lane is suitable for a small SUV like a Yeti.

Having said that, I suspect that after a good downpour the surface could be quite soft, so I’d watch out for squishy bits. There was more evidence of idiots doing off-piste driving; driving up the verges and into the drainage ditch, making a real mess and damaging the drainage system - plonkers.

Lane 3

Heading out from Chatsworth village towards Handley Lane, SK2369-02 is a lovely UCR that again is popular with other users, I passed a elderly couple who weren’t best pleased to see me, we smiled at each other as I passed, but I could tell it was forced.

From the village the surface is solid with views to the left of rolling pastures, then as you climb further it narrows quite a

lot, with high banking and trees on either side and overall the going is good.

There are a couple of axle twisting sections which are caused by running water, but nothing to worry a proper 4x4, or even a smaller SUV with traction control. Further towards the western part of the lane it was soft and muddy with the track edges again being abused.

Lane 4

I’d read on TrailWise2 that my next lane, SK2270-03, was a bit scratchy and overgrown, and they weren’t wrong, this short but great lane bent my aerial! This is the first bit of damage a lane has caused in 3 years worth of green laning in Deux Smurf!

From south to north you follow one set of muddy ruts, it begins fairly narrow, and becomes tighter the further down you drive, to the point that you can’t open your doors to get out as the banking is too close and high. In other parts, the trees and their branches encroach into the lane to create some teeth grinding and buttock clenching sound effects as they scrape down both sides of the vehicle.

On both sides of the ruts were mounds and holes that had Deux Smurf lurching and flexing in equal measure. On reaching the end I felt exhilarated, and because I’m a glutton for punishment I turned around and drove back up!

Selecting low-box 2nd gear I crawled up in almost tick over and I let the day old BFGoodrich KM3s do all the work, and as I lurched from side to side they got me to the top without a problem - well, except that bent aerial.

Checking my watch I calculated that I had another half hour before I needed to be at the hotel, so decided to head to the final lane and then drive the other lanes in reverse, as you do.

Lane 5

Heading north to south, SK2863-06, or Back Lane, begins with a nice flat packed surface with a forest on your left, and open fields on your right that you could drive a low slung performance car down. Around halfway along the lane it suddenly drops off, and becomes slightly more challenging with a rocky step to negotiate. Recently, with all the storms we’ve had, I’ve heard reports that this section has been completely washed away, enough to swallow an entire Jimny, so be careful.

Further along there’s a left turn onto Butcher's Lane which should be avoided as it’s in need of repair and can be damaging to vehicles. Carry on though and the lane evens out, bringing even more stunning views.

Content with my morning’s adventures I headed to the Peak Edge Hotel, parked up Deux Smurf and spent the rest of the day driving Ford’s range of SUVs, which we covered in last month's issue.

As is the norm on media events such as these, you’re fed, watered and put up for the night in a nice hotel. In the morning after a good night's sleep and a hearty breakfast, the goal for the day was to drive up to Windermere for another overnight stay for the launch of the new Jeep Wrangler. Of course, I wasn’t simply going to head straight there, no, I broke up the 3-hour drive with a further 3 green-lanes that I’d found just off the A623 heading West, so not much of a detour.

Lane 6

Although it hadn’t rained during the night, the sky the following day was threatening and quite dramatic, and as I headed off there was a definite chill in the air.

My first lane of the day was SK1976-02, or Tideswell Lane in a little place called Eyam. On the map it appeared quite difficult to find heading east to west, so I got the lane up on ViewRanger via my iPhone and got it to direct me straight to it.

Nestled between a labrinth of stone walls, Tideswell Lane’s surface is hard packed, easy going and picturesque, it’s only when you come to the end that there’s quite a steep drop off, tight turn and steep incline to the main road, quite easy really.

Lane 7

Speaking of easy, after a few miles on the A623, SK1576-02 and SK1376-05 (Water Lane) there are fairly flat and solid lanes down which you could easily drive a Cortina, though the latter has a steep and loose entrance, so only a Cortina that’s an P100, and 4wd. I’m testing the age of my demographic now, if you know what a Ford P100 is without Googling it, you’re as old as me!

Lane 8

SK1177-03 was my favourite lane of the morning, because it was interesting, varied and had equally good views. This time driving from west to east the lane heads along on a gentle downhill single track towards what first appears to be a quarry wall, but it isn’t, just the side of a hill. You take a sharp left turn, and from there the lane takes a steepish right hand turn that’s slightly off-camber.

Once you reach the top, the surface turns to large cobbles which, by all accounts, when wet or icy can become incredibly slippery, so if you’re up there in winter, take care. At this point I was wishing for more supple suspension on Deux Smurf, as after every cobble I swear I could feel my fillings rattling!

Stopping to take my final photos I couldn’t help but smile at the cracking views behind me which were made more dramatic by the low clouds and threatening sky.

That was it, I headed back towards Stockport on the A623 then the M60, M61 and finally the M6 towards Cumbria for another overnight stay in a very posh hotel with Jeep.

My week didn’t stop there, once back from the Wrangler launch on the Thursday, I had a meeting on Friday in Leeds with the Northern Group of Motoring Writers, after which I planned another green-laning trip with a colleague around Scar House Reservoir. Then on Saturday to the NEC in Birmingham for the Camping and Caravanning Show, and finally on Sunday a green-laning day around Derbyshire with my local GLASS group, all of which I’ll share with you in the coming months.