Success Barriers – Free Lessons Lesson 1: How to Set Your Life in Order Lesson 2: The Benefits of Journaling Lesson 3: How to Get Past Stumbling Blocks Lesson 4: How to Find Your “Why” Lesson 5: How to Realize Your Dream Lesson 6: How to Progress in Business Lesson 7: Understanding Your “AHA Moment” Lesson 8: Establishing Your Personal Testimony
Success Barriers – The First Step to Success By Theodis Gamet and SanDee Zawada There are endless reasons why a person can get “stuck” and not progress in business. So, we would like to share with you how to get past those stumbling blocks and on the road to success. Everyone has things in their lives that are potential obstacles or roadblocks that can look so huge that most people don’t even attempt to go through them or even try to skirt around them. These are lies that we were told as a child or lies we’ve told ourselves and believed. The lies have become a part of our mentality and we are attached to them emotionally. Most of us don’t acknowledge them nor are we aware that the lies that we believe may be what are holding us back from succeeding. Only around five percent of the population in the United States has made the effort to address things in their lives that restrain them and hold them back. But, those five percent have set themselves apart from the rest. They are the ones who know who they are, what they want to do, and go for it. To be in the place you really want to be, you need to get those stumbling blocks out of your way. There is a process to find out what those issues are and neutralize them but it takes a courageous person to go through those steps. Our thoughts, 1
memories, and feelings do not have to be the vehicles that hold us back in life or cause us pain. Next, after you identify the obstacles that hold you back and start working on them, then you need to identify your dreams. If you are like most people, you have lost your dream. We were created to dream and to see our dreams come to fruition but how do we recognize what our dreams are, and then how do we see our dreams fulfilled? This exercise is for those who have lost their dream and do not know what their goals are. There are lots of questions but you need to answer them so that you can get to the place where you can identify your dreams before you can even address your goals.
What Holds YOU Back When you are faced with a new opportunity, how does it make you feel? Can you identify with any of the following examples? I I I I I I I I I I
feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel feel
insufficient. unmotivated. nervous. fearful. under stress. unsuccessful. like I’m lacking something inside. like I cannot commit. overwhelmed. like I just can’t do it.
We Have to Believe in Ourselves What are the feelings inside of you that hold you back? Those feelings hinder you from believing that you can do it – you can overcome and believe in yourself perhaps for the very first time. Ask yourself, “How willing am I to make this happen?” Some people will have to work harder than others to make things happen in their lives to achieve their goals. The main thing is to be able to identify when something is bothering you so you can address it and conquer it and start moving forward. Remember, this is a process and that’s ok. Your goal right now is to start – to make up your mind that this is something you want to do. Do you want the floodgates to open and shower you with all kinds of blessings? Then there is work to be done because the positive flow that we all need to move forward does not come automatically.
How to Change Your Negatives into Positives 2
Do you have negative, controlling, or manipulative people in your life? I found that when I am dealing with an abundance of negative energy, it is hard to live in a positive state at the same time. In fact, I found that when I had so much negative energy surrounding me I got to the place where I felt frozen, frustrated, fearful, depressed, and like I was being used, etc. The hard part is getting to the place where you make up your mind that things have to change. That is why so many people have to get down to the very bottom of their being to make changes in their lives. When you get to the point where you have an “aha moment” then things become clear that you have to change before good things can happen. Are you sick or hurt physically? If you are sick or have a disease, no matter how hard you try, you have negative energy. From my experience of having a debilitating illness and being a member of different help groups, it is very discouraging and depressing for most people who are chronically sick or in constant pain. Your sickness has to be addressed as you move toward your dreams and goals. To be well and have positive energy physically, you will need to commit to a healthy life style. The ultimate goal is to have positive energy in every area of your life – emotionally, physically and mentally. Following are the main things that need to be addressed to have positive energy with a healthy body, mind, and emotions: Unhealthy relationships Food Water Finances Your living environment Unhealthy thoughts Your job
What is an “AHA Moment” I have learned that an “aha moment” is life changing. For me it is when you realize a personal truth in your life and adjust your thinking and actions accordingly. You have to identify with what your subconscious has been trying to tell you but you have refused to listen. You have to “agree” with that truth and protect that truth. It might be that you realize something in the core of your being and have to draw a line and say, “don’t go over this line – NO TRESSPASSING!” If you can do this, you are a brave person indeed. This is what is called “setting a boundary.” Setting boundaries will start defining who you really are. You can actually change the course of your life with an “aha moment!” I believe it is when you align your “aha moment” to agree with your Spirit. In any case, the God looks down and smiles and winks at you and opens up the floodgates and makes positive things happen in your
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life. Now you have positive energy in that area that you just cleared out. Now your objective is to protect that positive energy flow and just keep adding to it. When you clear out negative energy, you can get rid of depression and sometimes even emotional sickness that is stored in your body. People will notice that something is different about you. You will start attracting positive people and positive things in your life. You cannot change another person but you can change yourself. You’ve gotta love those “aha moments!”
Come to Terms with Who You Are When you are asked to write down your goals do you get frustrated? If you do then you may not know who you are and what you want to accomplish in your lifetime. How can you know what your goals are when you don’t know who YOU really are and what YOU really want to do? Have you ever considered getting a business mentor or a personal mentor? Well, you may need one or the other or perhaps even both. Successful people have mentors and life coaches. They help you focus on what is important in your life. They will ask the tough questions like: What motivates you? What unmotivates you? What do you like? What do you not like? What energizes you? What robs you of your energy? What makes you feel good? What makes you feel bad about yourself? What makes you happy? What makes you sad? What is important to you? What is un-important to you? What do you think about? What do you dream about? What is your core personality? How do you define yourself? What do you want to have? What do you want to accomplish? What are your roles in life? And, the big one – What is your WHY? These questions will lead to other questions. Get a pen and paper and buy a journal. Write down these questions leaving enough room for your answers. Then take them one by one and answer the ones you can. You may have to answer some of the easier questions before you can tune into the harder ones.
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You may have to have a mentor or life coach to help you work through these questions. When my mentor saw my “why,” he said, “This is not it. You need to revisit your ‘why.’” Well, I thought, “how does he know?” Well, I had made a list for my “why” only to find out I certainly did not know what my why was and discovered something special about myself. I had told people my whole life that I am a “helper” but did not understand until I was going through this process that I can combine my core personality and my “why” together and accomplish what I was meant to accomplish. Going through the above process and having a mentor has changed my life. Now I am following my dream and setting my goals accordingly and seeing them unfold and come to pass right before my eyes. This has truly been a treasure in my life and I owe a tremendous “thank you” to my mentor for helping me find my true path to follow.
Self-sabotage is Your Number One Enemy When you do the opposite of what makes you happy, that is self-sabotage. Sometimes we are our worst enemy. For you to progress, you have to change yourself and how you think about yourself. You have to address those thoughts and feelings that you are attached to in negative ways like rejection, abandonment, self-loathing, self-doubting, low self-esteem, etc. because when you have negative energy, you automatically attract a negative lifestyle.
The Solution to Self-sabotage I am writing this, not as an expert, but as someone who has gone through this process. I will tell you how I left self-sabotaging behind and how I am seeing the results of my hard work. The solution to becoming the person you want to be and leaving the negative behind including self-sabotage is by journaling. That may sound really simple but anyone who wants to have samples of my journaling may request it from me personally. I can tell you, journaling has been a powerful tool in my life. I have a method that I will share with you that has worked for me. This method is helping me to clear out the negative energy and allow positive energy to flow in my life. Journaling has helped me and can help you to become enlightened and more in tune with your subconscious. You already have all the answers to your questions, you just don’t know that yet. Unless you do something to help you get over your barriers or lies that you have believed about yourself – you will continue to be stuck in your same old negative attachments and self-sabotaging ways.
The Simple Way to Progress – by Journaling As you go through your journaling you will discover what you want to be, what you want to do, and what you want to have. By discovering who you really are, you will 5
find your dream(s) and then be able to make a plan on how to see your dream(s) come to pass. This is huge! What if we had a movement of people fulfilling their dreams and what they were created to do? That would be awesome! There is a simple way to get in touch with your feelings and it is by journaling. This process can be very emotional and tiring though, especially at first. The more you get the negative feelings out that are affecting you the most, the easier the process will become.
The Process of Journaling There are different ways to journal. But the basic method is still the same. Sometimes I write a question and then answer the question. Other times, I will write down the scenario of how I am feeling or what is bothering me. The main thing is to write until there are no more words flowing from you. Do not censor your words – don’t even think about them or try to make sense of them – just write them down. Next under what you just wrote, write down “The Lie” and underline it. Now write down “the lie” that you have believed about yourself and what you have just written. For example, you may write down the question, “Why do I feel unsuccessful.” You then write all the words that come from your thoughts and feelings until there are no more words. You should not try to censor your words – just write them as they come whether you agree with them or not because you probably will not agree with the words you are writing down. You may have the past mixed in with the present and you may not identify with those words at all. It’s all good – just write them all down and get that junk out – all of it. When you write down “the lie” it will be obvious from what you have just written what “the lie” is. It is staring you in the face. Remember, keep writing until there are no more words. There may be more than one lie and you may have to revisit this subject again at a different time on a different level. Just make sure you are truthful with yourself for how you are feeling right now. Next, write down the words “The Truth” and underline it. You may not see “the truth” being fulfilled right now but write down the truth anyway. You may not feel as though you are successful but write it down anyway. Write down all the words that come to you. As you do this exercise, you may feel the positive power rising up in you and you start to feel the positive breaking through the ugly lie you previously wrote. This is where you will see how the positive dispels the negative. This exercise is so simple yet it is so difficult to do because we have to come face to face with our secret fears and that is one of the hardest things we will ever have to do. We have believed all our lives that “the lie” is “the truth” and that “the lie” is more powerful than “the truth,” therefore, we believe “the lie” over “the truth.” But the
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truth is: “the truth” is more powerful than “the lie!” You will believe this as you see it unfolding in your life.
How to Identify Your Dream When you go through your questions and become really honest with yourself and write down what you want to have, you will discover your “have” is your “dream.” It becomes so simple you may wonder why you never have been able to identify it before. To get to what you want to have, you first have to understand who you are as a person in the core of your being, what you want to do or accomplish in life, and only then can you realize what your dream is. Do you have a secret – something so precious to you that you dare not tell anyone? This is something you find yourself thinking about but believe it is a “pipe dream” and that it could never happen. This is your fantasy, you think, and it is something you will allow yourself to think about only on occasion and can never relate to as a possibility to happen in reality. You usually snap yourself back to reality thinking as soon as you can get control of your thoughts! Guess what? This is your dream! You may have to adjust your dream as it starts to unfold, but I believe your basic dream is what you were created to do.
Those Darn Barriers In my mind’s eye, I’ve had walls up that I could not go through. The walls looked like black concrete walls and I dared not approach them to even touch them. In the past I have been offered opportunities but I would visualize a wall and I would quickly decide that I couldn’t go there. I could not get through that dark concrete wall. When I would see that wall, it would demotivate me and discourage me and I would not be able to commit or fulfill any commitment I had made and I would fall along the wayside. I was defeated, discouraged, and certainly not able to fulfill my dreams. What I have found by doing the journaling process is that the black concrete wall I envisioned was not really a hard concrete wall after all. That wall that I had been afraid to approach was just a dark vapor wall all along, and when it was exposed to the truth, it dissipated; it left; it disappeared; it took off; it just wasn’t there anymore! Why? Because “the truth” is more powerful than “the lie” and “the lie” can’t compete with “the truth.” When you realize “the truth”, it is life changing. That is when you have an “aha moment” – when you realize “the truth!” And your life will never be the same! When you get a taste of the positive manifesting in your life instead of the negative, that is such a powerful personal realization that you want more of it. That new positive in your life encourages you and drives you
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to discover more positive, and more positive, and more positive. It gives you the courage to do the hard work necessary to get through those darn barriers.
My “Aha Moment” Something happened in my life that was excruciatingly painful. I could not even function for a few days after it happened and I came to realize I had to change. That is why I set my first boundary to not allow people to control or manipulate me and use my helping nature for their selfish purposes. My life drastically changed. Within two weeks, I saw all the negative people leave – never to return – and I experienced the floodgates open and new, positive people enter my life. I used to wonder where all the good people had gone until I got rid of the negative people in my life. Now I only attract positive people. Can you imagine how that feels when you’ve felt used and abused your whole life and all of a sudden you have wonderful people coming into your life and helping you to fulfill your dreams? It is absolutely amazing and I have such an awe feeling about this whole process. I’ve been there. I’ve done the work and I am still in the process as I need to address my personal issues. The beautiful thing about setting that boundary and watching the positive manifesting in my life is, I did not tell one of those five people not to call me. They just stopped calling on their own. See, negative cannot stand to be around positive! What I am telling you was so powerful in my life that I actually saw things changing right before my eyes.
My New Objective What is my new objective? It is to set personal boundaries to allow positive energy to flow through me allowing me to be the creative person I was meant to be. The positive energy I attract attracts other positive energy creating a momentum. So, my “job” is to protect the positive energy flow and allow it to work through me for a common good. That might sound difficult or unattainable to you right now, but it is really simple to do. People tell me all the time that I am different. They tell me that I am smart. They give me all kinds of compliments but I realize I am just allowing and not hindering. As I realized my “how” as it relates to what I am intended “to be,” while I was going through this discovery process I experienced a very special moment. It was such a special time that I wrote down how I was feeling just experiencing this realization for the very first time. I share that moment with you now.
“How” As it Relates to My “Be” Quoted from my journal… by SanDee Zawada 8
”Ah, I feel this is a “sacred” time. As I am getting the picture of what I am to be, and as it is further unfolding, I sigh a sigh of relief and ah… This moment is so very precious to me that I am savoring every moment and every strike of my pen. As tears stream down my face, I now realize I don’t have to do this alone. Now that I know what I am and what I truly want to BE and what I was created to BE, I can now allow it to BE! I simply can allow the Creator to create through me and allow it to happen. I stand in awe of my Awesome Creator. He is truly my motivation. He is my helper! He is my strength! He gives me ideas and intelligence to carry them out! He is all knowing and I now can flow in His blessings because I am allowing and not hindering.”
Overcoming Fears Fear paralyzes but it doesn’t have to. There are ways to overcome fears. When you say, “I can’t” then you are defeated before you even get started. The thing did not defeat you, you defeated yourself. You are your own worst enemy when you close yourself off to overcoming your fears. When you say, “I will” you are giving yourself permission to go forward to accomplish what you want or need to accomplish. Your “why” needs to be so strong that you must find a way to succeed even if it means conquering your fears to get the job done. When you learn to conquer your fears, then and only then will you see your dreams fulfilled. Turn your negatives into positives. Positives are so much more fun and fulfilling than negatives. The Three Main Fears Fear of Failure Fear of Success Fear of Rejection
Your Why The steps to success, or accomplishing what you were meant to accomplish, depends on the strength of your “why.” If your dreams are good and honorable, then they should stand the test of time, but if your dreams are misplaced motives, I don’t believe you have that positive energy flow attracting good things to happen in your life. Sometimes good things happen to bad people, and sometimes bad things happen to good people, but I believe eventually, when you have a flow of positive energy in your life the good overtakes the bad. Find out what motivates you. Your “why” will point you in that direction. When you find out what you were created to be you will want to do what motivates you. Does 9
money motivate you? No? Well, don’t use money as a motivation. Do you like helping people? If the answer is yes, then that might be something that will motivate you to get you to your dreams. When you find out your motivations, flow with them. Don’t fight against what is in your heart to do. When you discover your “why” it will propel you in the direction of fulfilling your dreams. Your “why” has to be so strong that even in the hard times and the times of questioning you will know you are on the right path and have the momentum and initiative to follow your dreams. Your “why” is what you know in your heart you were meant to do but you did not have the courage to believe!
Your Dream is the Process The journey is the dream; it’s not the destination. When you start on the journey of finding and fulfilling your dream, you are now actually living your dream. The arrival is just the proof or evidence of the belief you had in the process of getting your dreams fulfilled. Your dream is the journey so enjoy the process! As you discover your “why” and your “how” then you can start believing that your dream is attainable. As you attract more positives in your life, the positives will include ways to fulfill those desires that are in your heart. What things seem good to you? What feels right? You will find those things coming into your life. You just have to recognize them and allow them to flow through you. Remember, positives attract other positives.
Other Exercises There are other things you will want to write down about yourself. They will help you find out who you are and help you build a good, healthy emotional outlook about yourself. Personal Things I Need to do: Write a list of things you need to do personally to get you where you want to be. Things like: be consistent, be organized, be more assertive, be brave, be kinder, be more open, etc. My Affirmations: Write your own affirmations. You can get these from your journaling. Find the positive things you have in your journaling and write them down. Next find the negatives and turn them into positives and write those down as well. Example: Your negative statement may say, “I attract negative people.” Your positive statement would say something like, “I only attract positive people.” Write down that positive affirmation in your journal. This helps you in numerous ways as it affirms the process of leaving behind your negatives and turning them into positives. Read your affirmations often and experience your own personal power welling up inside of you!
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Book List: Write down a list of books you want to read to help you in this process. Choose self-help books that speak to your weaknesses. Things to Think About: Make a list of things you want to think about or explore. This section may include words to look up and define or a list of businesses or products you may want to consider being involved in to help fulfill your dreams. You might want to write down blogging ideas or a list of articles you want to write. This is a think-tank section. Just write what comes to your mind because what is in your heart just may come to pass and these things will be encouragers as you look back and realize they are being fulfilled. Special Sayings: Have a section for sayings that speak to you. Examples: • • • • • • • • •
“When you have ‘aha moments’ to the point of drawing your line in the sand, your Spirit responds and smiles.” ― SanDee Zawada “It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed.” ― Theodore Roosevelt “There is a gigantic difference between having a great deal of money and being rich.” ― Marlene Dietrich “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.” ― Gautama Buddha “Don’t expect anything – give everything.” ― Mike Elmore “I learn from my successes and failures and move forward.” ― Mike Elmore “In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.” ― Bill Cosby “Help Yourself So You Can Help Others – That is how you change the world” ― Theodis Gamet “Get In Where You Fit In – You must start for your business to grow” ― Theodis Gamet
My Truths: Write down your truths. It might help to affirm where you are going by writing down “The Truths” in your journaling process. You may not want to write down “The Lies” because they have been dispelled and now you want to focus on just your truths. This is just another way of affirming who you really are. My Roles: Write down your roles. You will find that you have many, many roles. This exercise will help solidify who you really are and what you want to be. Examples: Mother Grandmother Daughter Sister Son Brother Father Grandfather Protector 11
Teacher Learner Student Partner Advisor Blogger Designer Supporter Researcher Writer The list goes on and on. Now out of the list, choose the roles that speak to what you really want to do in your life. My dominate role is that of being a helper but that was not even on my list. Think of your core personality. How do you define who you really are? According to what you want to be, this is the real you! My “I Am” Affirmations: Lastly, make a list of things that answer your personal affirmations. Examples: • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •
I I I I I I I I I I I I I I I
am am am am am am am am am am am am am am am
a giver. prosperous. a great businessman or businesswoman. kind. wise. a visionary. intuitive. loved. a loving person. happy. joyful. humble healthy physically. healthy mentally. healthy emotionally.
Save a lot of room for your affirmations because as you get started on this process you will find a lot of things to write down.
Things to Remember Your goal is to find out who you are not who others think you are. So, a good thing to remember is while you are still vulnerable and learning the process, only share your dreams with people who will believe in them and encourage you and your journey. To find out who you are and what you want to do you have to find out what motivates you, what energizes you, and what is important to you. 12
How you define yourself is who you really are. What do you want to “have?” What do you think about in your secret moments? This is your dream. As you go through the process of answering these questions, you will discover who you are and what you want to do. Remember, what you want to have – that is your dream! Learn to dream again. Dare to dream again. Revive your dream. Be the person you were created to be.
My Dream Being Fulfilled A number of months ago Theodis Gamet, the visionary and marketing person behind this website and marketing strategy that is taking the country by storm and is even going global, called me. He told me how busy he was and I said to Theodis, “You need someone to help you.” He told me that was the reason he was calling me. Right there over the telephone I committed myself to helping Theodis and I have been an encourager, writer, and somewhat of a partner ever since. The interesting thing about this is, everything that we are doing now is what I wrote down in my journal under my sections “Who Do I Want to Be” and “My Why” before Theodis asked me to help him. Everything else I wrote in my journal confirms what we are doing and fulfills everything I want to accomplish in my life.
Who Do I Want to Be (What is My Desire?) Quoted from my journal… by SanDee Zawada I want to help people – MHP (Master Helper of People). Helping people is my motivation for everything I do. Interesting! I’ve told people for years and years that I am a helper. When I help people, I get the job done. Helping people (helping by equipping people) is my motivation for writing, finding investors for opportunities, helping people find answers for what ails them, reporting about health issues, things that help people without much money, help people save money, help people find products that are healthy for them – non-toxic. That is also why I like to recruit.
My Why Quoted from my journal… by SanDee Zawada • • • • •
I I I I I
want want want want want
a community. to be a part of a community. to create jobs for people. to have a global business(s). to help people by assisting (equipping them). 13
•
• • • • • • •
I want to have non-profits (organizations that): o Help get teenagers off the streets. o Be an angel investor to help women start their own business and realize their dreams worldwide. I want to provide for myself. I want to be debt free. I want to retire with a good living. I want to be energy independent. I want to grow my own food. I want rentals and apartments. I want to provide a place for my children and family to live if they want to.
Are all of these things manifested in my life right now? No, but I am seeing them unfold in front of me. Remember the dream is in the journey. All of these things are lining up to be fulfilled, in part by what Theodis has set up for business opportunities for those who want to participate. I chose to be a part of this movement and I am reaping the rewards.
What is Your Truth Finding out your truths may be hard but it is so rewarding. As you find your truths you will see your life change before your eyes. People will notice you in a different way. Your children will see a change in you as well. You will be happier, more fulfilled, more loving, more fun, etc., or maybe that is just me? Maybe this process only works for me. What do you think?
My Journey Late last year in 2012, I was homeless. Unless someone had given me a place to stay for a few months and allowed me to pay when I could, I would have been on the street. I couldn’t afford a place to live, I could hardly afford food. I had set my boundaries and was paying a huge price for the decisions I made. What was happening though is that I found myself being thankful. Every morning I woke up, I felt thankful. I was living in the dirtiest place I had ever lived. I was sleeping on a mattress on the floor, I didn’t know what my future held but I was thankful and optimistic. I knew something had changed in my life and, yes, it was a little scary but I was in an upward movement and that was enough realization for me at the time. I soon took my life insurance license test and passed it with flying colors and went to meetings at my new company. The presenter asked the new agents to write down their goals and present our goals to him. I raised my hand and told the presenter that I needed to be transparent with him but when he asked me to do that, I felt like crying. He told me to call “my goals” by a different name and that 14
should get me where I needed to be to be able to write my goals down on a piece of paper. Wrong. I was no closer to writing down my goals even though it made me feel better to call my goals by a different name. I mentioned to a friend my predicament and that I needed to write down my goals but I did not know how to do that. My friend who ended up being my mentor told me he would meet with me and help me to discover my goals. Well, it certainly was a discovering process. He gave me exercises to start with but even before I could start on those, I found myself having to do some discovery exercises of my own. I worked diligently discovering things about myself by journaling that I needed to before I could work on my mentor’s exercises and soon I could focus on them as well. I have made great progress but I still have more to do. What I noticed is that I started seeing progress almost immediately as I wrote these things down. I started seeing momentum. Momentum is what you need to keep moving forward. In a few months I found another place to live. My relationship with my friends and family were improving. I was feeling so good about myself that people frequently remarked about how happy I looked and that they could see a tremendous difference in me. One of my children saw me in a new light and told me how proud of me she was. She was giving me hugs and high-fives, etc. It really felt good to see myself on the right path for a change. My mentor helped me define who I was. He was proud of me too. I had so much encouragement because people could literally see a change in me. The encouragements were so important to me. I also started having wonderful friendships like I had never experienced before. I found myself being a loyal and helpful friend and many of those people have become my closest friends. Before I made the big decision to change which was my “aha moment,� I did not have strong boundaries. I had been married for 21 years and felt used and abused. I attracted users and manipulators, controllers and abusers. I was basically a happy person but the lifestyle I had settled for and the friends that I attracted caused tremendous pain in my life. I had chosen a negative lifestyle without even realizing it. My second marriage was no better than my first and was probably worse. I went from one job to another and moving here and there. I had no stability in my life and no direction. Does this resonate with anyone out there? Can you relate to anything I am saying?
Anyone Can Change If I can change anyone can change. I mean that with every fiber of my being. I believe this process of finding out who you are and what you were meant to do will help you to be a better person. I believe it will help you find your way and discover what you really want to do in your life. I believe that this process will help you discover what you need to do to provide for yourself and your family if you have a 15
family. I believe this because I now believe in the journey. I believe that positive energy attracts positive things in your life. Do you want to change your negatives into positives? There is a price to pay. You may have to change jobs. You may have to change your relationship with negative people. You may need to make some hard decisions. The main thing to remember is to allow the positive to flow in your life. Don’t try to force good things to happen. Your “job” is to protect the positive flow in your life. Also remember you cannot change anyone else only yourself. Get comfortable with who you are, and see if your life’s journey changes from the negative to the positive. If you decide to go on this journey, allow me to be the first to congratulate you. Congratulations and welcome to your new life-changing journey! Like I said, if I can change anyone can change and this is a testimony to how my being willing to change has affected my life in the most important way – with my family. My daughter sent me a text as I am proofreading this. I am seeing wonderful things happen right before my eyes as I am going through this process. My daughter’s text is long but I want to share it with you: “Mom, I just want to let you know that I am so grateful that you are in my life; that we are developing such a good relationship; that you have healed in so many wonderful ways; that I have a *mom* that I’ve always dreamed of having and it so happens it’s actually my mom. You are so giving and generous and I do not take it for granted for one second. I appreciate every effort you made to come back into our (your children’s) lives and I know it hasn’t even been easy…to the point of desperation sometimes. But I am SO grateful that you never gave up. I have been seeing and experiencing what love truly is and it had taught me that it is never too late to better a relationship. I’ve been learning a lot about love and life from you lately. I also thank you for your lack of judgement about my life and allowing me to be me and loving me no matter what. I described you today (to the guy you saw in the jeep) as a “great mama.” Thank you for EVERYTHING you do and for everything you are. I love you so very much. Xoxo (October 31, 6:44 p.m.) My response to my daughter was: Wow! This is what I have dreamed of too! It is so easy to point the finger, but I found that as I have changed, my relationships have changed! I’m thankful I’ve changed too! Now I have the desires of my heart and you are a tremendous part of that! Thank you for sharing that with me! I love you with my whole heart!”
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