ARTIST IN RESIDENCE by Franne Demetrician
For many people, this time of year is
his high school graduation, helping to
about school supplies, school clothes
plan his party, shopping with him for
and backpacks. For others, about
some new clothing - all the fun stuff was
packing up their older kids and getting
a great distraction. But as the big day
them off to college. For me, the classes
approached, I found myself a puddle of
I’ll teach or the classes I’ll take. We all
emotions. Memories of my own child's
have our fall routines and rituals that
departure for college percolated up and
are comforting in their predictability.
caused me to relive the trauma of moving
This year my comfort went out the
her into her dorm and leaving her behind
window because my grandson Logan
to begin her college adventure. I was a
went off to his first year of college in a
hot mess that day, knowing that our lives
faraway land called Louisiana.
were permanently changing. Letting go was difficult. Facing her empty room
I am the mother of a single child, and my
made me feel lost and sad. I had a lot of
single child is as well. My only grandchild
work to do to learn to be a mom from
has lived within a mile or two from me
afar. And I had to let go.
most of his life. I have relished every moment with him and was fortunate
Now the feelings are much the same;
to have spent many years helping his
the same trauma of letting go and
parents care for him as he grew up. The
acknowledging that nothing will be the
suddenness of this moment in his life
same. Somehow, I feel my age more
and mine is surreal. I keep asking myself,
poignantly and realize that I am in the
Where did 18 years go? How could he be
process of yet another life lesson – “letting
in college? Was I there all this time? It
go 2.0”. I cry when I drive by Logan’s high
came about in a blink.
school, and I gaze at pictures of him with tears welling and feelings overtaking.
The months and weeks leading up to his departure were exciting and active.
What do I do with a life lesson circling
Lots of celebrating and anticipation of
back to knock me in the head once 32
