EMBR A CE 'A N D' (14) / S H O W C AS E T H E N OW (46) / N OTI CE THE JOU R N EY (84)
Figure Out Worthiness with Kimmay Caldwell
The Wealth Issue
SHIFT YOUR FOCUS
Gratitu de Journal :
Embrace Gratitude
Journal GRATITUDE
Shift Your Focus
de, joy and When you measure life in gratitu . - Heather Vickery success are around every corner
TPY is pleased to share this newly published Gratitude Journal: Shift Your Focus from our longtime partner, Heather Vickery—host of The Brave Files podcast. Use the code PERPETUALYOU to receive 20% off your purchase and FREE shipping! Visit bit.ly/hvgratitudejournal to deepen or begin your gratitude practice.
A RT W O R K by @ CR A F T I VAT ECT
We believe in choosing, embracing, unleashing, and celebrating the woman you've always been...the woman you are today... the woman you're meant to be...
Be YOU...the Perpetual You.
L ET T ER from our ED I T O R
THE
THE OFFICE The Perpetual You 101 Putnam Ave. Hamden, CT 06517
THE LIST To receive the digital edition of our magazine directly to your inbox, join our mailing list at: bit.ly/TPYList.
I
've always thought of the separate parts of my life as just that: separate. Similarly, I've viewed the facets of my identity as distinct parts that make up a whole.
T H E C O M MU N I T Y Look for us on social media @theperpetualyou.
THE SOCIETY Meet like-minded women in our private FB group, The Perpetual You Society.
Through working on this issue, during which time I also began taking an art class for moms, I began to wonder if Layers isn't a better way to describe the phenomenal dimensions that go into making me a woman. Layers are malleable, textured, and messy. They can be laid down and pulled up and moved around. Certain layers get buried—for a long time!—and then, when we miss them, we search for—and find—them once again. Layers don't have to fit into boxes like "work" or "life," "motherhood" or "entrepreneurship." Instead, they swirl around: interacting with each other, affecting
THE STOCKISTS Pick up a print copy of our magazine at the following shops:
each other, benefiting from the texture and dimensions of one another. Describing myself and my life as layered feels more authentic and more flexible; I can keep piling them on (or I can peel some back) until life feels balanced, exciting, and manageable...until I'm exactly the person I'm meant to be.
Lovet Shop Milford, CT ShopLovet.com
Try 'layers' out—you might like it as much as I do!
Dwell New Haven, CT DwellNewHaven.com
T HE M A R K E T P L A C E Shop consciously at theperpetualyou.com/ the-marketplace.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Publisher & Managing Editor @wordsbyleelee
p.s. Check out our ABUNDANT coloring pages this month. After flipping through the mag, tear out each of our section dividers and get to coloring!! Original artwork contributed by TPY Bestie, Amy Stamp. Follow her @craftivatect.
Phenomenally. Phenomenal Woman, that's me. – MAYA ANGELOU
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A R T W O R K by B R I A H L U C K E Y, @ B R I A H L U C K E Y S T U D I O
I am a Woman
P H O T O by @ M A R K I E J O N E S P H O T O G R A P H Y L L C
FIND US @THEPERPETUALYOU
IN THIS ISSUE
Create Wealth by Embracing Dimensions M O N T H LY M US I C
Explore different aspects of your personality with T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
this month's playlist on Spotify at bit.ly/TPY
Embrace
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Embrace your purpose in life, even if your work/life blend is nothing like you thought it would be. Featuring coach and bra fitter, Kimmay Caldwell. P H O T O G R A P H E D by M E L I N DA G A R R I C K
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Realize Emphasize the aspects of your life that are working well, and put those practices to benefit elsewhere. Make lunch productive
14
and expect multiple uses out of single items. Connect your mental health to your movement practice. Get lost in a book or a cocktail or an afternoon of restorative self-care. Lifestyle Determine Your Priorities .............................. 14 {Re}Discover Your Beauty............................... 30 Diversify Your Style........................................ 32
TPY Faves Literary Journeys............................................ 17
30
Work Lunch .................................................... 19 Layered Cocktail ............................................ 20 Mental Movement.......................................... 23
32
Multi-Tasking Products .................................. 24 Regenerative Self-Care.................................. 36
Plus Take a trip with Fempreneur + Travel Photog @kristi.nb
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
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Dwell Embolden your space to embody everything you love, from your favorite collections to your chosen values to your ingenius creations. Design Display Your Stuff............................................. 40 Design Your Life................................................ 42 Divulge Your Pursuits....................................... 46
46
86
Live Emancipate your mindset from previously held stories, identities, and expectations. Reconnect (to your self); connect more (to others); and disconnect (from shame, guilt, and past recriminations). Mindset Deepen Your Self-Care.................................. 76 Develop Your Environment............................ 80 Distinguish Your Blessings............................. 86
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FIND US @THEPERPETUALYOU
T H E MA K ERS
Our makers consistently share their time & talents. We'd love to introduce you to the lovely ladies who contributed to this month's issue.
Melinda Garrick
Rhonda Caldwell
Cover Story Photographer
Dwell Feature Photography
@melindanitaphotography melindanitaphotography.com
@rhonda_leigh_photography rhondaleighphotography.com
Melinda Garrick, creative owner of Melinda Anita
Rhonda Caldwell is a Hamden, CT resident obsessed
Photography, is a Wedding and Lifestyle Photographer
with photography. She began taking photos when
based out of the Hudson Valley, New York. She is a full
her now 11-year-old daughter was born. When not
time English Teacher and runs her photography business
photographing, Rhonda is active in her community. This
on the side. She is a mother to a 3 year old daughter
is Rhonda's first collaboration with The Perpetual You.
and hopes to instill in her a love for photography. This is Melinda's first collaboration with The Perpetual You.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Jessie
Casee
P.K.
Art Director
Brand Marketer
Proofreader
@littlelegendsdesign littlelegends.com
@hopeandharbor caseemarie.com
Connect on Facebook
Krystal
Sarah
Cat
Mantra Siren
Cover Story
Media Editor
@krystalbrandt krystalbrandt.com
@daringmotherhood
@catballou24 amlofarms.com
Constance
Lisa
Brittany
Collaborating Photographer
Collaborating Photographer
Collaborating Artist
@constance_schiano constanceschiano.com
@right_click_photo rightclickphoto.com
@designsqueeze designsqueeze.com
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Amy M.
Amy S.
Christy
Collaborating Artist
Collaborating Artist
Collaborating Artist
@amoscatfish amymcnamara.space
@craftivatect craftivatect.com
@cmjohnsonart christymjohnsonart.com
Are You a Lifestyle Blogger? TPY's blog is coming {back} soon and we want to feature your work! Send a link to your blog or sample of your work to hello@theperpetualyou.com to be considered as a collaborator.
Let me help your brand
Branding, Graphic & Web Design for Bold Business Owners. Let's start a conversation! hi@createlittlelegends.com
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Words by Lee Lee
Values-Based Copywriting for Cause-Based Businesses. wordsbylee@gmail.com
A RT W O R K by @ CR A F T I VAT ECT
to align your daily practices with your ever-evolving desires
A RT W O RK by @ N ADIAHO R N
I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y M E E R A L E E PAT E L @ M E E R A L E E PAT E L
THE LA DY
Madame C.J. Walker Madam CJ Walker was the moniker of Sarah Breedlove, a businesswoman and philanthropist at the turn of the 20th century. The first of her enslaved family to be born into freedom, Sarah's journey took her from selling her own hair care brand door-to-door to becoming one of the most successful businesswomen in history. We remain inspired by Walker’s dedication to equality and her dauntless commitment to pursue one’s dreams. The W EALTH ISSU E
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There is nothing like a concrete life plan to weigh you down. – INDRA K. NOOYI
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
E M B R AC E
Diversifying with
Marie Levey-Pabst
The first time I put money in a retirement account, I was flummoxed. Here I was, a childless young adult, and I was being asked to decide how to invest retirement funds that were being taken out of my paycheck. Stocks? Bonds? Funds? I had a vague sense of what it all meant, but I would need to do research to be sure.
A
t the time, retirement seemed eons away. And
As a parent who helps other parents create a balanced life
everything I read told me that I could be “aggressive”
on their own terms, I have seen the ways diversifying your
with my plans given that reality. Everything I read,
portfolio can hold true in the non-monetary aspects of life.
on the internet, even in the Investment for Dummies book I picked up, had one string of advice that was the same:
We all need opportunities to care for others in our lives (be
Diversify your portfolio. Don’t put all your eggs in one basket.
they children, parents, partners or friends). We need time
Essentially, if you have any savings or money to invest, you
expend our energy at high levels, and time to rest. We need
want to spread it out a bit so that you don’t risk everything
time to work hard and time to celebrate.
in just one kind of investment. Municipal bonds are pretty stable, and stocks are more risky. It’s worth having money in
to be by ourselves and to be around others. We need time to
If we put all our financial wealth into one type of investment,
both if you have enough to spread around.
we run the risk of losing it all if that one type of investment
Most people who have money to invest follow this advice to
our time and energy into one part of our lives for too long.
goes belly up. Similarly, we risk burnout when we put all of
some degree. We all see the sensibleness of spreading out dollars. But what about our other forms of wealth, the nonmonetary kind? Why are we less quick to diversify our energy, our time, our creative/mental capacity?
continued on next page
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When it comes to figuring out how to better use our time and energy, I always find there is wisdom found in groups of women muddling through together. Here are just a few of the ways women I know diversify their time, energy, and joy: “I got theater season tickets to force me to go out every once in a while.” - Stefanine J.
“Join a team sport - that way other people are counting on you to show up.” - Mandy E.
“This summer we are letting our kids try different things, from a yoga class to learning how to fish!” - Sarah M.
“I'm taking singing lessons from one of our neighbors. It's awesome! My husband and I took up French together.
Reflect + Diversify
We couldn't always take lessons together, but we learned
Choose just one aspect of your life that you are going to try
in tandem and practiced with each other sometimes. It's
diversifying this month. Here are a few suggested areas*
a very sweet way to make the most of very short time
to explore:
together on weeknights. I took up knitting when I was trying to write my thesis, and I mastered it over a couple of years. We grow a garden and like to try something new every year. We used to brew, but now we're trying to learn how to make soap. I joined a yoga studio and I make sure to go as much as possible to get my money's worth.” - Kate C.
“In the winter months a friend of mine and I do independent study at Mudflat (a pottery studio). It’s nice to have the one night a week to decompress / do something different!”
•
Work/Life - Consider a device free day and a work-late day
•
Friendships - Plan an event with work-only friends and parent friends
•
Time - Plan both white space and project space
•
Family - Enjoy kiddo time and grown-up time
•
Hobbies - Attend clubs (for fun) and classes (to learn)
* To avoid either/or thinking, make sure to schedule time for both ideas in this area in any given week/month!
- Ariel P.
“Going food shopping to a different food store or farmers market - finding a small local one in a different town.
Spreading ourselves out doesn’t have to mean spreading ourselves
Always gives me a new perspective when I visit a farmers
thin. We all need opportunities to explore the aspects of life that
market in a different community.”
bring us joy, whether day-to-day responsibilities, wild, once-in-a-
- Cathey A.
lifetime dreams—or any situation between those two spectrums.
“Sometimes when driving home I get off the highway
I challenge you to stop living a life of OR and embrace a life of AND.
a few exits early and take some slower back roads/
In doing so, you we can live with intention and the benefits of
figure my way to my apartment. I like it because it feels
diverse choices.
adventurous and because I get to see new neighborhoods, stores and parks. Thinking about it now, I see it also puts me in a position where I need to be present, observant and aware - good mindfulness!” -Liz E.
Marie is the founder of the Create Balance method and a co-host of the Mama Now podcast. She teaches parents to create balance between family, work, and personal fulfillment. Connect with Marie at @CreateBalanceCommunity on Facebook or at CreateABalancedLife.com. Photos by Casee Marie, @oneofthefolk
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
P H O T O & R E V I E W by @ C A T B A L L O U 2 4
I N T I MAT E J O U RN EYS
I’ve Been Thinking... The Journal
Made Out of Stars
My Friend Fear
by Maria Shriver, pub. 2018
by Meera Lee Patel, pub. 2018
by Meera Lee Patel, pub. 2018
In her bestselling book, I’ve Been Thinking,
Made Out of Stars is a wonderfully inspiring and
A visual self-help book unlike any other, My
Maria shared her own story; in this
useful journal! Each page includes a quote and
Friend Fear does not offer a miracle solution
accompanying journal she invites us to embark
a prompt for you to consider who you are, how
to your anxiety. Rather, Meera Lee Patel leads
on a journey of our own. A wonderful and
you view the world, and what you are capable
the reader down the path of being okay as-is,
practical way to live intentionally, this journal
of. Throughout are beautiful illustrations and
offering a new perspective on emotions. Patel’s
invites us to reflect on what living a full and
paintings from Meera Lee Patel. If you want to
powerful words and breathtaking illustrations
meaningful life means by providing us with
delve into your artistic, inspired side, this is a
are combined in a way that reading this book
weekly inspirations, quotes, and prayers.
great place to begin.
becomes a healing process in itself.
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Handmade bags for your on-the-go lifestyle
Bags designed and made by Lisa Maree in Bristol, CT facebook.com/lisamareedesign T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
Embrace Connection with
Casee Marie
Reclaim your working lunch by mixing business with pleasure.
S
o much happens at the table. Important decisions
In hectic life, meals offer the opportunity for presence: a bit
are reached through heart-centered conversation,
of time away, an occasion for mindfulness. What would it
exciting ideas come bubbling to the surface over a cup
feel like to sit down with a friend and discuss your creative
of matcha tea, love and laughter mingles among the burgers and fries. Meeting with my fellow entrepreneurs for coworking over
projects, family plans, or business endeavors over a leisurely meal? Devoting the time to connect with each other brings benefits to work, life, and the friendship itself.
drinks, coffee, or a good meal brings accountability built on a foundation of respect and support. Whether we’re dining on pub food or grabbing a sandwich at the local cafe, gathering with intention means we're engaged fully in the present which increases productivity.
Casee Marie is an inspirational poet, music photographer, and affectionate dog mom. Connect with her @oneofthefolk. Photo by Casee Marie, @oneofthefolk
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REALIZE
Pear Appletini Slow down, and savor your accomplishments, with a cocktail full of possibility.
Often grown together, pears and apples are a perfect complement to each other. Pears were once lauded as a gift from the gods, a symbol of prosperity. The apple represented knowledge and love. Imbibed as a cocktail, we are certain to feel happier! The unusual combination of pear sake and apple vodka, with a splash of ginger ale is surprisingly refreshing in the honeyed heat of a winter fire. This elegant and sweetly mellow cocktail is an excuse to put your feet up and reflect on the diverse fruits of your endeavors. As the sun sets outside the window, celebrate the peace and possibility of simple fruits and subtle flavors. Pears and apples, shaken with ice, and mingling in a beloved cocktail glass. Add a maraschino cherry and reward yourself for a day well done.
Words + Photo by Willy of Life Unstill Photography, @lifeunstill. Willy is a drinkloving portrait photographer based in Denver, Colorado but she will travel for cocktails!
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Bringing you closer to nature davinejewelry.com The W EALTH ISSU E
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Handmade Candles, Jewelry that helps you feel effortlessly beautiful every day.
aliciascandles.com
Vegan & Cruelty Free
T I F FA N YA N N E . J E W E L R Y
CRUNCHY DIVA: CRUNCHY DIVA: /'kr n(t)She 'dev / /'kr n(t)She 'dev / N O U N : A refined hippie. N O U N : A refined hippie.
A Stylish confident and A Stylish confident and inspired individual who feels inspired individual who feels connected to the earth. connected to the earth.
C R U N C H Y D I VA D E S I G N S .CO M
SHOP NOW AT CRUNCHYDIVADESIGNS.COM
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
Embrace Mental Wealth with
Erica Hornthal, LCPC, BC-DMT
Being wealthy means so much more than financial stability. You can be rich with love, friendships, passion, and purpose.
here-and-now rather than anticipate the future or dwell in
You can invest in yourself and, by doing so, you can increase
the past.
both physical and mental health.
Manage your time. Taking time to move your body throughout
Investing in your mental health might not be as easy as buying
the day, in any way possible, reduces tension build-up and
stock in the latest company to come out of Silicon Valley, but
stimulates blood-flow.
you will see gains! Here are 3 simple ways to invest in your mental health through movement: Allocate your resources. Our ability to breathe mindfully is
Movement is a critical and multi-dimensional aspect of our overall health. Embrace what you've been given and you'll be "wealthy" indeed.
a huge asset. Harnessing the power of your breath increases your ability to manage stress, reduce tension, and divert energy where needed. Take inventory. Identifying the sensations in each part of your body increases mindfulness and your ability to focus on the
Erica is a dance/movement therapist and the CEO of Chicago Dance Therapy, a body-centered psychotherapy practice serving Chicago and its suburbs. Connect with her on Instagram at @ehornthal. Photo by @lifeunstill The W EALTH I SSU E
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REALIZE
From Top to Bottom: VEGAN HANDBAG ($110) by Odycee
HANDPAINTED FRAME/PRINT ($40) from Caitlin St. Angelo
NARRATIVE HAND CREAM IN MAGNOLIA BLOSSOM ($10) from Illum
T h e PE REVERSIBLE R PE T UAL YOU HANDMADE SCARF ( from $20) from Langton's Scarves & Sundries
REALIZE
UPCYCLED JEWELRY, ( from $18) by Geo-Graphic Gems
CRYSTAL INFUSED CANDLE IN AWAKENED ($12.95) from Bee Lucia
Embrace Versatility Our lives are multifaceted; why shouldn't our products be versatile too? Maybe we can't have it all. (Maybe we don't want to.) Still, we curate lives full of dimensions—a variety of passions, a smorgasbord of friendships, a blend of work, life, and fun—and our products need to stand up to these facets, both in style and in function! A cosmopolitan handbag that doubles as a laptop case? Yes, please! A 2-in1 scarf? Why not!? Candles, lotions, and jewelry that bear metaphysical benefits? Couldn't live without them! Look for items that speak to more than just one part of your life, and they will feed more than just one aspect of your personality. Attract dimension, and manifest versatility. Click on the name of any product to be taken to the maker's website.
Photo by Casee Marie, @oneofthefolk The W EALTH ISSU E
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L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E
P H O T O by @ R I G H T _ C L I C K _ P H O T O
– A M Y S CH UM E R
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
REALIZE
E M B R AC E
A New Locale with photographer Kristi Beisecker
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Diverse and colorful, San Francisco is a dimensional and fascinating city, laced with history. On visits to the San Remo Hotel and Pier 39, I focused my photographic efforts on capturing the modern yet bohemian lifestyle of the North Beach, and paying homage to the artists who have lived and worked there.
BOHEMIAN BEGINNINGS Beginning in the 1930s, artists, musicians and poets found a home at the San Remo, some paying for their tab with a painting or two, most moving on when they could find a larger place more suitable for use as a studio. The easygoing environment at the hotel is in keeping with the bohemian North Beach lifestyle, and attracted creative talent for several decades including local artists Julius Hatofsky and Ernie Biggs. After their stays there in the 1950s, Hatofsky went on to become emeritus instructor at the prestigious San Francisco Art Institute and Biggs gained a reputation in New York.
P I E R T O P L AT E One of the benefits of living on the coast is the plethora of seafood that comes in daily. Since 1965 local fisherman have been bringing their catch to Scoma’s pier. This local favorite offers fresh seafood and a diverse menu in a fine dining environement. I dined on a Mediterranean Mussels dish and had a cocktail. The longevity of this local favorite shows its importance in the ever-changing landscape of San Francisco.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
WONDER + WHIMSY Elsewhere on Pier 39, I experienced the whimsical side of the bohemian lifestyle, from mirror houses to the authentically painted San Francisco Carousel to arcade games and other forms of entertainment. The mix of modern entertainment and
E U R O P E A N F L AV O R
historical landmarks reflects another of the unique aspects of
I am always amused by the European influence on popular
renderings of San Francisco, including the Golden Gate Bridge,
destinations. Because it can seem so out of place! Even in
Chinatown, Alcatraz, and the sea lions at Pier 39.
San Francisco. I loved learning that the carousel has artistic
an authentic American city you can still find your favorite European flavors. For example, Pier 39 offers a wide array of shops, restaurants, and kitschy experiences. One of my favorites was the CrĂŞpe Cafe, serving authentic crepes in a buttery envelope. A sampling of the Florentine crepe made for a light but filling authentically "French" lunch.
Kristi Beisecker is an artist and freelance designer in Massachusetts. In her spare time she creates photograms using electricity and organic materials with analog darkroom processing. She also reads and writes about science and spirituality, composes and performs music and gives spiritual guidance. Connect with Kristi @kristi.nb or kristibeisecker.com.
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REALIZE
Embrace Passion with Leigh Schwab
Passion can manifest itself in many forms.
T
he green beauty industry is fueled by passion - passion for safer products, biodegradable packaging, cleaner ingredient selection, creating awareness, and product innovation. Because of this passion, conscious consumers now have the benefit of a wider variety, and—in some
cases—a higher caliber, of products to choose from. Last year, I decided to follow my instincts and create a business I am passionate about. In doing so, it opened so many doors in every aspect of my life. Turning a dream into a fulfilling and successful career is hard work but it can create a lifetime of knowledge, friendships, and wealth. In what ways could you create wealth in your life as a result of passion? Whether starting your own business or supporting another passionate woman by buying her products, trust me: whatever aspects feel intimidating are worth the risk.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
1
BeYOUtiful I admire any woman who finds a balance between fulfilling a passionate career and feeding the other aspects of life. These female entrepreneurs followed their gut and have created businesses that fill a niche in their own lives, and in the skin care industry.
1
One Love Organics While One Love Organic’s motto may be “Luxury of Less” the founder, Suzanna LeRoux, has created a company that is abundant in skin care gems as well as being the only Ecocert licensed facility for organic skin care in Georgia.
2
oneloveorganics.com
2
Type A Deodorant After trying too many natural deodorants that didn’t work, Allison Moss decided to create her own. Armed with an extensive knowledge of ingredient safety , Type A has created a high-performing deodorant without preservatives that still passes the industry-standard preservative efficacy test. typeadeodorant.com
3
The Hippie Homesteader Amanda Rose of The Hippie Homesteader created a line of products to help cure her chronic itchy skin but soon realized that sharing her passion and knowledge with her friends and family could create a thriving business.
3
thehippiehomesteader.com
Leigh Schwab uses her love for skin care to help educate women about the ingredients in their products and the need for proper skin care legislation in our country. Learn more about her passion for a healthy and simple life on Facebook and Instagram @leighschwab. Main photo by @jazellesartistry The W EALTH ISSU E
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REALIZE
Embrace a Classic A classic staple gets a makeover. You get a new outfit!
T
he deeper we get into winter, the less appealing our closets start looking. Rather than trying to diversify our wardrobe, we can style one main staple in a variety of ways to bring interest and depth to our outfits.
A button-down work shirt becomes a light jacket. A pair of leggings transform into a layering piece. A little black dress becomes the skirt of a whole new outfit. Embrace your creativity and empower your closet. Grab a classic and discover how complex a role it can play. Maybe January isn't the time to assess our aesthetic. Maybe winter isn't the season to dress to impress. Maybe—just maybe—we can explore what's already in our closet, play around with what we already love, and remember the value in basic versus bespoke.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Embrace the Button Down
1
The classic, clean button down is a pulled together piece that's more versatile than you think. From work to dinner, play to power, comfy and casual to dressed to impress, test out the limits of this classic and you won't be disappointed.
1
Dressy Casual A button down with a wool skirt adds interest and texture to an otherwise neutral outfit. Pair this look with flats and you're ready for a full day of work—and happy hour after. Style Tip: A half tuck in the front adds shape and movement without being too dress or too casual.
2
2
Dressed Down A button down can be a fun and lightweight alternative to a cardigan. You get coverage and added interest. Layer over a favorite t-shirt and jeans to be dressed up just enough to feel pulled together. Style Tip: Roll your shirt sleeves to 3/4 length to avoid looking to messy or too stuffy.
3
Dressed to Impress A solid-colored button down layered over a patterned dress brings dimension and a little flair. Alternatively, pair a pinstriped or polka-dotted shirt with your favorite little black dress. Style Tip: Tie the button down at your waist to add shape and balance to the look.
3
STYLIST + CLOTHING
Swap-It is a secondhand boutique and styling service in Medford, MA. They believe women can feel good in their clothes every day. Find out more at @aswappinggoodtime. FEATURED JEWELRY
Catherine Maldonado @teepearls PHOTOGRAPHER
Casee Marie @oneofthefolk
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P H O T O by @ R E P R E S E N T A T I O N M A T T E R S . M E
P E R SP ECT I V ES from T H E PA N EL
Q
Which aspect of your personality is your favorite?
For so long I thought I was strange because I am a highly sensitive
Shayna Holistic Life Coach @shaynamahoneyxo shaynamahoney.com
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
introvert. (Meaning I am shy and emotional.) As I started my businesses and had to push out of my comfort zone, I realized I didn't want to be someone I'm not. I can't pretend to be an outgoing, high-energy person. I am truthful about how important it is for me to have self-care and time for myself to re-charge.
REALIZE
Cathey TPY Partner + Collaborator @cathey.april
My ability to be open to change with a sense of curiosity.
Summer
Where I thrive is a happy heart. So, cultivating that aspect of wealth
Health & Wellness Coach @summer_delaine summerdelaine.com
Allison Sensual Living Coach @allisonlrichard allisonrichard.com
is my favorite. I give it my full attention and practice gratitude daily to ensure that I stay rich in that area. When I live in gratitude and joy, all other parts of my life align.
My self-awareness. I love being attuned to the oscillations of being human: the growth and expansion, the full keyboard of emotions, the magic I have to feel empowered and create my own life contrasted with the humbleness I feel when I have to surrender and trust the Universe and a bigger picture my knowledge isn't privy to.
Lesley
My agreeableness. I feel I am kind and sympathetic. I give people
TPY Collaborator
the benefit of the doubt and am always happy to try to help them
@mrsp825
out in any way I can.
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REALIZE
P H O T O S by @ O N E O F T H E F O L K
Self-Care Suggestions Call an old friend. Brainstorm about
what wealth really means to you and how wealth shows up in so many ways. You may be wealthy in ideas, friendships, community, or money. Have fun challenging traditional ideas about what wealth is.
Share the wealth. Create a community sharing “library� where local friends can share books, cooking supplies, tools, services, and space.
E MBRA CE REFL ECT I O N
Imagine yourself on a Spiritual Snow Day. You are home, the snow falls gently outside, you have nowhere to be. Take this time to dream your wildest dreams, and contemplate new dimensions for generating income. Think creatively about what work means to you and how you do it. Picture yourself there: You sip a cup of Wellness Tea to get inspiration and contemplate desires. You anoint yourself with Jasmine essential oil to refresh your sense of adventure. You look out the window past your Hedera Ivy plant and feel a newfound sense of positivity and openness. You gently touch the Flourite pendant on your neck, noticing your optimism for new ideas about how you will bring wealth into your life. Your entrepreneurial spirit is in its bliss; there are no limits to what you can create.
E S S E N T I A L O IL
C RYSTAL
PLANT
PRACT IC E
Juniper
Flourite
Hedera Ivy
Wellness Tea
BENEFITS
BENEFITS
BENEFIT S
BENEFI TS
Encourages reflection and optimism
Refreshes, rejuvenates, and enhances mood
Guards against negativity
Promotes quiet yet invigorating contemplation
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
W O R D S by @ LY D I A M A N D E L L , T O O L K I T inpsired by @ M Y L U N A R LY
A RT W O R K by @ CR A F T I VAT ECT
to align your physical space with your ever-evolving self
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I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y @ C M J O H N S O N A R T
Gooseneck Lamp / 'goosnek lamp / noun Singular illumination for your multi-passionate vision
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DW E L L
On Display (CONFESSIONS OF AN ANTI-KONDO HOMEMAKER) with
Lee Lee McKnight
Instead of minimalizing or downsizing, I'd rather spend time intentionally layering in the stuff I want to be surrounded by.
S
o many of us struggle with organization that
is the penchant to display those things an aesthetic
we're easy prey for trending solutions, and
to be modernized. Furniture, books, plants, textiles,
while I have nothing against neat drawers and
accessories: if we love them, these things deserve to
well-arranged pantries—provided that neatness really DOES bring you Joy—I wonder if de-cluttering isn't too simple of a solution.
be looked at, touched, felt, admired, and inspired by. Sitting in my living room, my husband's step-mother once gently commented, "You have a lot of stuff...
Removing clutter, hard enough in and of itself, grossly
But you display it well." I took this as high praise,
overlooks the many reasons we have so much stuff
considering she'd recently downsized, taking care
in the first place. Retail therapy, for one. A culture of
only to hold on to the things most important to
materialism also comes to mind.
her. (We gladly took many of the other things off her hands!)
The biggest obstacle, in my home, to simplifying just for the sake of simplifying, is the fact that I really like
I might surprise myself and become a minimalist
the things I've accumulated. Sure, I have a lot of stuff;
in the future, but until that day, I think I'll leave my
but—for the most part—it was gathered intentionally.
junk drawer full of junk and spend my time (and
For this reason, the wealth of decor "clutter" in my
joy: thrifting, collecting, displaying, storing, re-
life just doesn't lend itself to giving away; if I went
displaying, and basking in the abundance of my
through and asked which things brought me joy, the
beautiful stuff.
mental energy) instead on activities that bring ME
answer would be different on any given day. As my moods shift, so do my vignettes. Nothing inspires me more than a room layered with stuff the homeowner has collected. Collecting, when done intentionally, isn't a condition to be healed, nor
Lee Lee is obsessed with intentionally styling her home. Connect with her on Instagram @wordsbyleelee. Styling: Sarah Bennett @sarah.bennett.733 Photo Credit: Mayumi @celebrate_well
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
DWELL
A Wealthy Home with
Jillian Anderson
Explore an enriched life by saying Yes to the decor that makes you feel alive.
A
few days before giving birth Jillian Anderson—a transformational coach for women—moved into a house fully furnished
in a style she did not resonate with, mixed with her own possessions. A process of clearing her space of items she no longer needs or uses, and those that are no longer functional, resulted in her uncovering a new story of prosperity.
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"If it doesn't feel high quality, and it doesn't feel connected
from 'down the shore' in NJ, dried mushrooms and a deer
to where I'm headed, it's easy for me to let it go," Jillian
skull, and flowers from the florist that beautifully juxtapose
shared with me last year. Ultimately if she doesn't love it, it
garden views.
no longer has a place in her home. As her space has become more clear it can now successfully hold the energy of YES -
Yes is luxury in the beauty of high-quality bed linens to cozy
yes to simplicity, natural beauty, luxury, and ease.
bath towels and blankets, warm sheep skin throws, along
What exactly does that mean? "Minimalism to me," says
reclaiming time for relaxation at home. While exploring what
Jillian, "is an exploration of my biggest YES, radical clarity,
it means to focus on the things she loves, Jillian gave herself
and the energy of 'less but better'. I want to feel LIGHT and
permission to hire a professional painter and a cleaner.
mobile, beauty and luxury." In her home, this looks like wide open and bright spaces with mostly clear surfaces. Fewer but intentionally placed quality items let functional pieces—like
with soothing natural finishes on furnishings. Yes is also
Saying YES has healed Jillian in so many ways, most profoundly in the sense that she doesn't have to "do it
the large wooden dining table—take center stage.
alone." Support brings freedom, which means your space
Jillian's design aesthetic celebrates natural delights: from
knowing when it's time to move on from this space and
the dark woods used to build this 1930's summer cabin to the
expand into a completely different home that continues to
display of treasures from foraging adventures, such as shells
meet your newly defined needs.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
can continue to evolve as you do. Freedom can even mean
Dwell on This One way to enrich your living spaces is by exploring what makes you feel like your most abundant self, and infusing those symbols of wealth and prosperity into your space. Here are some ways Jillian has explored this practice in her own home.
1
Feel Luxurious. What says luxury and brings a smile to your face? Jillian chose a handmade rug that is warm to her feet and pleasing to her eye. You might choose quality cookware and appliances because you love preparing meals, or just the right light fixture to set the mood for an evening bath.
2
Explore Energy. Everything in our spaces holds energy that we are reacting to, whether we consciously realize it or not. Jillian placed a mirror to reflect both the dining table and a window. Both radiate energy and abundance in this room where her family receives joy, nourishment, and the good feelings of nature's bounty.
3
Create Ease. Is there something you can delegate to a professional (like Jillian did) so you can enjoy your relationships more, pursue your passions, or spend time on your inner life? Free up time by consciously choosing how you spend your money on things you value - even if it means moving through limiting beliefs about how you are allowed to use your income.
What would saying YES feel like for you? What would choosing a RICH life feel like? In what ways will you permit yourself to prosper—both in your home and in your life—this year?
LaToya is a mama / imaginer / gypsy nomad who explores life through the lens of interiors, imagination, and inspiration. She lives on a bus with her husband and son exploring the Australian landscape. For more inspiration, follow her @latoyaburton_musing. PHOTOS + FEATURED HOME: Jillian Anderson coaches female entrepreneurs to transform their relationship with money, so they can have more freedom and fulfillment. She runs Permission to Prosper a group program to help women unleash their earning power by working directly with the power of their feminine energy. Connect with her on Instagram @jilliananderson.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
An Office of My Own Words by Lee
Lee McKnight
Photos by Rhonda
Caldwell
In which Lee Lee, our editor and publisher, traces the development of her home office.
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DWELL
F O R A G E S , O R O N LY F O R H O U R S . Four year ago, at the start of this magazine, I wrote about the importance of having space of your own. On the cusp of entrepreneurship, I set apart a small and windowless, yet warm and cozy space in a corner of my bedroom. The space—tucked away under a sloped ceiling in what was, essentially, a closet—was small enough that I could design it quickly and cheaply, mostly with things from my own home. At that time, my kids were 3 and 8. Little did I know that I was also on the cusp of a new phase in motherhood, where my children—both of them— could exist wholly outside of me. More independent every day, both were in school at least part of the time and, when home, were old enough to play without consistent management on my part. In retrospect, a room to myself that wasn't really a room at all was exactly the right-sized step I needed to take to begin to feel that I, too, was independent: a separate individual other than just 'mom.' At the time, it felt radical just to declare the space a "kidfree" zone. (My matching radical design move was to staple a strip of floral fabric on the wall.) It was theoretically important that Mommy had her own space, and no one was going to fall apart as a result. In reality, though, I rarely spent time in my little corner. I could blame it on temperature— too hot in the summer, too cold in the winter—or placement (it was half of a damn closet, after all); however, hindsight tells me I just needed to know I could have a space—whether or not I would spend time there. At some point over the next few years, I realized how silly it was to have my favorite chair and my most beloved bookshelf hidden away where no one could see them and I clearly wasn't going to use them. So I gave them new homes, in the living room and art closet, respectively, and the closet became a closet again—albeit one with a fabulous, floral aesthetic!
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I feel so intensely the delights of shutting oneself up in a little world of one’s own, with pictures and music and everything beautiful. – VIRGINIA WOOLF
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C A U G H T A N D TA N G L E D . And so, where did I work? For a while, half of my living room was
I came to think of that room as my office once again. Since I
a shared office with my sister. Then, for a year or so, I tested
had just ramped up my in-person market presence, the "office"
out having the first floor guest bedroom be my "home office."
doubled in function as our TPY storage room.
And, at some point, I moved my desk to our bedroom and stuck it in a different corner, where it became more of a tribute to my penchant for work/life blend accouterments than any sort of
Even with the aroma of our beautiful, natural, delicioussmelling soy candle line wafting through the room, I didn't enjoy
work space.
working in a space mostly used for storage. Not to mention the
In all honesty, my favorite place to work from is my bed. Always
The vibe was stagnant, not dynamic. I might as well work from
has been, and — I imagine — it always will be. A bed can't be
bed again!
decorated, though, nor can it hold file cabinets or bookshelves. I love(d) being there, but I still needed a designed space of my own
remaining futon—just in case we had an overnight guest or two.
Eventually, I used the excuse of not having dedicated home
where I could stash my stuff.
office space to test out other work options, such as coffee shops,
In the last year or so, I slowly began to reclaim the first floor
When in doubt, I holed up in my favorite chair—now in the living
bedroom, which had intermittently housed Airbnb guests and
room—and typed away, often spending more hours there than
part-time tenants. Though I never moved my desk back down,
the cat. And the cat spends a LOT of time in that chair!
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
my husband's office, and a short stint at a co-working space.
N O G AT E , N O L O C K , N O B O LT. This past fall, the Universe did me a favor. My younger son, now 6 years old, decides he's going to move out of his {very small} bedroom, which is on the same floor as the rest of our family bedrooms, into the {very large} basement, two flights down. (By the way, this move is totally in keeping with his character—I was just surprised it happened at such a young age!) At first, we left his bedroom unused and mostly empty, but eventually his old room became fair game. By November, I'd decided on making it my home office. A for-real home office, with a desk and an office chair and a door and things on the wall and my favorite chair and most beloved bookshelf and all the things I love most in the world (minus, obviously, my bed). When my parents sent me money for my birthday and the fall remained more of an Indian summer than an almost-winter, everything fell into place for a weekend of painting, cleaning, and decor-based dreaming. At which point I realized I was just as excited to design the space as I was to have claimed it as my own. Something in the definitive "this space is for me" aesthetic took my usual pleasure in decorating and design and ratcheted it up to giddiness. You mean I get to pick the paint colors?! I get to arrange the layout?! I get to decide on the style notes?! I get to play, investigate, layer, sit with it, and then decide to re-do it all yet again?!? Sure, I enact all these functions when designing other rooms in the house but, I at least try to guess what elements others might benefit from. And, invariably, there are constraints of function or layout that I'd rather not have to deal with in my design. In my new-to-me office, though, the only contender was ME. Maybe the budget was limited, and for sure the space was small, but I still felt quite free.
C O N T E M P L AT E . . . D R E A M . . . L O I T E R . Using the size of the room as permission to re-paint Everything, I chose a creamy ivory for trim, a soft blue for the walls, and a coral-y red, which I happened to have on hand already, for the door. Yes—I painted my office Red, White, and Blue. Unintentionally. I briefly considered changing the blue but it seemed silly when I was going to cover all the walls with stuff anyway (which I did!).
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A couple of weeks in, I found the curtains on sale—a pattern
As much as I like having the dedicated space for my work desk
with all the right colors—and just last week a friend gave me the
and comfy chair, by far my favorite corner of the room is my
perfect sized rug in a more saturated palette than my colors, but
personal altar. At a recent workshop, I made some sacred art
one that works nonetheless. The rug really makes me feel like
of my own to add to all the crystals and other found talismans.
the room is D-O-N-E, even though I know I'll tweak the design
Even in such a small space, my inner mystic can feel grounded
for the rest of my life!
and at home.
To add depth to the palette, I also brought in some purples, browns, and golds. I found a green lamp at a thrift store and figured I'd repaint it; maybe one day I will. For now, the color doesn't bother me all that much.
A L L T H AT Y O U W I L L H AV E T O E X P L O R E . An office of my own feels at once luxurious and necessary, frivolous and a functional aspect of modern living. I step into it
For texture, I have artwork—a mixture of thrifted pieces,
knowing I'm blessed to have the privilege of space, even as I'm
handcrafted stuff, and pieces by artists I've met—and many little
aware I probably won't spend as much time in here as I plan to
tchotchkes, which I can move around to keep the space feeling
(the bed beckons, after all, just down the hall...).
fresh. Books relevant to my current work-life blend philosophies add dimension and stability.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
I'm grateful we moved to this house with its odd 2nd floor layout we thought for certain we'd have to renovate that now seems to
TPY Marketplace Shop consciously for handmade goods from women we know and trust.
"Be You" Keychain
be working out just fine. I'm happy that we refinished our basement instead so it serves as a spacious, warm, and cheery back drop to our curiously independent child's new bedroom. Core Values Banner
I'm beyond appreciative of my patient hubs who doesn't like home reno but helps me anyways, and for my artistic older son who honors my need for him to approve of my designs. I'm even glad I have a cat who loves my chair as much as I do! I remember being just as giddy when my closet-sized alcove had been designed, just as proud and pleased when my guest bedroomturned-office was staked and claimed, and just as excited to get to work when my shared working space took up half of our living room. Throughout that journey, each of those spaces spoke to the person— both mom and entrepreneur—that I was at the time.
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The W EALTH I SSU E | 53 theperpetualyou.com/the-marketplace
TPY Marketplace Shop consciously for handmade goods from women we know and trust.
Big Mala Necklace (4 options available)
This euphoria, I think, must be what drives each of us to design and redo and fiddle and fight for our aesthetic to be heard. The desire to have something that visually describes how we feel inside, and who we have come to be, propels us to search out the rooms we can call our own. The stumbling blocks—major or minor—propel us to search out the rooms we can call our own. p.s. Curiously, or ironically, I have just accepted a job supporting another female business owner, which will take me out of my home upwards of 20 Self-care Magnets
hours a week. I don't think that means I need an office at home less, though. I'm imagining myself at the end of a long work day, discarding all my various sundries: scarves, jewelry, outerwear, boots, bra...as I make my way slowly but intentionally through the house, up the stairs, and past the coral door. I'll sink into my chair. I'll appreciate my altar. I'll sigh at all the work still to be done. And I'll smile because it feels good to be home.
The Lee Lee is the #ladyboss of The Perpetual You—a lifestyle brand for women living intentionally. An editor by trade, designer by heart, and mother by choice, she seeks intentional practices and a mindful mindset. Connect with her on Instagram @wordsbyleelee, or, if you’re in or near Hamden, CT, stop by to see her new home office! Photos by Rhonda Caldwell Desired Feelings Candle, 4oz. tin (4 options available)
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
theperpetualyou.com/the-marketplace
*Main quote and section titles taken from Virginia Woolf's writings.
Remembering My First Office
"Your dream of having your very own space, and having it be exactly what you need it to be, is not just possible but is necessary to becoming who you want to be."
Back then, having a corner of the house felt radical: I needed to experience giving myself permission to have space. And, yes, I needed to experience the freedom of decorating something with just my needs in mind. While I've grown tremendously since claiming (and designing) this tiny 'first office,' I still need to occasionally remind myself that I deserve space that is welldesigned, aesthetically pleasing, and functional for my lifestyle and needs. Looking back, I'm reminded yet again that this isn't about Perfection or even the pursuit of such a thing. Claiming space is about freedom: of mind, body, and soul. I now know, too, that space is a point of privilege, and, as such, offers the challenge to spend time there creating opportunities for others not as fortunate as myself. I eagerly face this challenge nearly every day--and I'm pleased that I can {still} do so from a room of my own.
The plants are no longer with us, but the mid-century desk is still a fave
Lee Lee's favorite chair: then & now
Pleased as punch to be surrounded by my beloved things
Winnowing down the items that brought me joy
Re-visit Lee Lee's first Dwell article from our Aug '15 issue at http://bit.ly/TPYDwell1.
A few of my forever-favorite things owls, books, and clocks
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Shop the Look We admire the picturesque view—but how often do we stop and appreciate the window itself? Keeper of light and bearer of sunny good news, the window deserves decor just as much as any other wall. Adorn the ledges with trinkets that don't block the view. Multipurpose by hanging more than just textiles from the curtain rod. And jazz up those already perfect curtains with a little feather action. Give your room with a view dimension and delight by treating the window with the same aesthetically pleasing care as you would any other {designable} surface
Click on any product title to shop these featured goods: RODRIGO CURTAIN PANELS by Bungalow Rose via Wayfair ($47/pair) ∙ SEA GL ASS + BRONZE WIND CHIME from Dwell New Haven ($) ∙ T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
MESA COLLECTION CANDLE IN LEATHER & CADE from Paddywax ($)
Loud + Lively corresponds to Benjamin Moore 2010-20
Limitless corresponds to Benjamin Moore 1648
Luxury Notes corresponds to Benjamin Moore 2075-20
L AY E RE D + L I VE LY
Leaning In corresponds to Benjamin Moore 1120
In this Office from our featured Dwelling, a bold palette is balanced by natural wood furniture, textural accessories, and a bohemian aesthetic. The effect is a space as ready to be used as it is pleasing to be within. Is your home office already speaking to you? Here are some ideas for incorporating this color palette in other rooms:
Listen Closely corresponds to Benjamin Moore AF-15
Lux Guest Room.
Boho Back Porch.
Place a honey hued headboard up against a wall
Collect weathered furniture and cover with lively
of luxurious and deep purple, and use crisp,
textiles in warm reds and purples. Paint the
cream-colored linens on the bed, with velvet
window trim a shiny cream to frame, and feature,
pillows in coral and blue for accents. Finish off
the beautiful blue skies. To make your porch feel
with lined curtains in linen or sateen and your
fully finished, hang art, mirrors, and tapestries on
guests will sleep soundly.
available walls.
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– SARAH BACHELDER
L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E
P H O T O by @ M A R K I E J O N E S P H O T O G R A P H Y L L C
A RT W O R K by @ CR A F T I VAT ECT
to align your life story with your ever-evolving sense of self
T H REE Q U ES T I O N S
with
Kimmay
What's one practice in your daily life
What about your physical space allows
For you, what is the relationship of
that brings you Wealth?
you to Embrace Dimensions?
Wealth & Dimensions?
I started writing and reciting affirmations on a regular basis. Not just at my altar space or by putting a card with the words on it in my mirror, but also by wearing jewelry or even temporary tattoos to remind myself of this affirmation. I love finding new ways to use affirmations. On a daily basis, even if it's not the exact action or ritual, I remind myself of things like "I am supported" or "this is happening for me, not to me."
My husband and I (and our cat) have lived in a small 450 sq. foot apartment for nearly 11 years. It can be hard to think we are wealthy and abundant in such a small space, at times. I have created an altar space in my home using a simple bookcase. On it are sacred items— my affirmations, candles and smudge sticks, journals and more—and above it I've hung my latest vision board. I come back to this sacred, safe part of my home to remind myself that I am guided and dimensionally wealthy.
We often feel that success and happiness are based on wealth, and dictated by numbers. It's important to know your numbers - like age, weight, salary, bra size - but not let them define you. In the same way, monetary wealth is not definitive of our divinity, success, permission to be happy, ability to create, or access to joy. I welcome in wealth in all dimensions, and am constantly reminding myself that I am worthy of wealth - in all dimensions. The W EALTH ISSU E
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MORE THAN... T H E D I M E N S I O N S O F B O D Y A C C E P TA N C E , with K I M M AY C A L D W E L L
Words by Sarah
Bachelder
Photography by Melinda
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When Kimmay Caldwell began working as a
After several years working in the lingerie
bra fitter in 2005, she had no idea that it would
business, Kimmay took her industry knowledge,
ultimately lead to finding her purpose and
passion for empowering women, and personal
building her own business. She simply needed to
experience overcoming body shame to create her
pay the bills. Yet, as she helped women in the very intimate and vulnerable setting of the bra fitting room, she became distressed by how much a woman's feelings of worth are tied up in arbitrary numbers.
own business. Bra fittings are still "her jam," along with one-on-one and group coaching, workshops, retreats, and women's circles. Kimmay also does sponsored content for companies with aligned values, furthering the message of body acceptance she believes in: that
Women of all sizes, shapes, and backgrounds—
women can learn to accept and love themselves
women with real bodies—did not see themselves as
as they are. As we chatted, it was clear: she truly
being beautiful.
believes in this message.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
S TA R T W I T H I N N E R C O N F I D E N C E When working with her clients, Kimmay takes an inside-out approach. While it is possible, and perhaps easier, to create change through external means such as haircuts, job changes, etc - that change will not be permanent because external change doesn't address our insecurities or solve internal issues. Taking the time and doing the work to grow from the inside, to uncover your emotions, how you feel about yourself, your values, faith and beliefs will influence what you believe about “your body and how you treat yourself physically,” says Kimmay. That, in turn, influences how you show up in the world and creates lasting and sustainable change. As she talked about the power of starting from the inside, Kimmay shared something she learned about diamonds: the more faces, or facets, a diamond has, the more sparkle it has. “I look at people, especially women, as diamonds,” says Kimmay. “The more willing we are to show the different parts of ourselves...the more brilliant we are in the world."
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RAISE YOUR AWARENESS LEVEL Doing bra fittings made Kimmay aware of the internal conversation she was having about her body, which prompted her to begin communicating "in a kinder way.” This new perspective helped her see the connection between the anxiety and stress her body has experienced with her lack of compassionate body communication. Now, Kimmay really listens to her body and what it needs, even if she’s asking it to do hard things. Our bodies are amazing at letting us know what they need, or as Kimmay says, “Breasts are the gateway to the heart.” Taking that time to be aware of how we’re talking to ourselves and relating to our body as a whole—what it does rather than only how it looks—can establish a healthier relationship. On the other hand, if we aren’t paying attention to the communication we’re having with our body, we might miss something. Becoming aware of that internal dialogue fosters a deeper connection, which can support us through stress, hormonal fluctuations, and other body dynamics.
CONNECT TO SELF AND OTHERS Remarkably, as Kimmay developed a deeper connection with herself, she witnessed a growth in her desire to connect with others too. Her desire to have a positive impact in other women’s lives had now become more important than the financial wealth she might have found pursuing a more traditional path. Having a strong, loving connection with ourselves helps our other relationships because greater harmony within leads to more strength to give to—and receive from—others. If we have a poor connection to our own bodies, energy we might spend on meaningful relationships is used up.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
Invite in the truth and let those truths become your affirmations.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
“The world needs you to show up and shine to your fullest capacity,” says Kimmay. "Do not be afraid to bring different dimensions of who you are into.... who you are in the world." Friendship and lasting connections will increase when we stay connected to ourselves and show up in the world.
P R A C T I C E C O M PA S S I O N & FORGIVENESS As we work on healing the connection with ourselves one of the strongest tools Kimmay teaches is compassionate self-forgiveness. Especially in relation to
How To Become More
our bodies. "Forgive yourself for any misunderstandings around what you do and do not deserve,” she says, “Start with a fresh and worthy heart."
Becoming more than your numbers starts with
We live in a society that has inundated us with stories
an internal dialogue - but it can't end there.
about how our bodies should look and function. From a
Establishing routines, practicing self-love daily,
young age, we are exposed to ideals of what is beautiful,
and checking in with yourself as often as needed are
feminine, and worthy—and what isn’t. Compassionate
all required for a true mindset shift. The following
self-forgiveness empowers us to let go of those
are some ideas for new habits that came to me as I
misunderstandings with love and empathy. As Kimmay puts it, “connecting with a truth, not a story” leads to self-forgiveness because it creates room
talked with Kimmay:
1
We spend every moment of our lives with our bodies, we might as well be friends. Talking to yourself as you would your best friend takes a lot of practice, though! Be patient with yourself and practice forgiveness.
for the full dimensions of our self to be revealed. As authenticity replaces the stories we’ve told ourselves, we can be free to live our lives with intention and depth.
2
SHARE THE MESSAGE
Practice.
Invest. Take a break from body obsession, and consider the other areas in your life that you would like to feel better about. How can you invest in them and take action? Check out Kimmay’s article on investing in yourself on her blog at hurraykimmay.com.
After discovering how many women were allowing their bra sizes to define them (they weren’t enough, or they were too much), Kimmay wanted to take action to change that, so she created the #morethanmynumbers campaign. Each woman in the campaign shares her bra
3
size and another number in her life she is choosing to
Affirmations only work if they are true, and if you believe them. You may not love the way your nose looks but there is plenty of truth that is beautiful in each of us. Invite in the truths that your body is capable, trustworthy, and independently worthy.
stop being defined by. To counteract the toxic messaging of judgement and expectations that we get from advertising every day, Kimmay's campaign depicts real women of different sizes and backgrounds in their lingerie, no airbrushing allowed. By showing up with honesty and vulnerability, these women honor their own journey and exemplify
Affirm.
4
Appreciate. Your body is part of the whole you, not the whole itself. Take time to recognize all of the things your body allows you to do, for yourself and others, that have nothing to do with how you look, and practice gratitude for those things.
the power of body acceptance.
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Kimmay also believes that when we learn to unconditionally love and accept our bodies as they are today, we're preparing ourselves for wider and deeper forms of love. Kimmay views unconditional love as a form of “investment” in your body and your relationship. In fact, she once invested in her own body relationship by not dating others and dating herself instead for an entire year! Unconditional love for your body works on different levels, releasing the burden of your past relationship with your body and your future fears about changes that come with aging. “It is really possible to go from speaking so unkindly to your body, covered in shame and really hating on yourself, to this new version of learning to love and work with your body in a positive way,” says Kimmay.
Do we really want our sense of worthiness to be tied to random numbers or other things outside of our control? Think for a moment about a number(s) that you have placed your sense of worth on. What would happen if you made a promise to yourself to let that go? I’ll be honest: I haven’t been concerned about bra sizes since I was a very young teenager. I just want a bra that fits! But there are other numbers about my body that I do struggle with and I don’t want to give them any more power. While knowing our numbers is valuable, they do not determine our
If you struggle with body dysmorphia, or any other
worth. "Numbers do not define who you are,” says Kimmay, “That's
issue that leaves you feeling less than worthy, please
information, not a definition." Kimmay uses the example of lining
remember—You are already worthy! We don’t need
up all of our numbers next to each other, and points out that their
to earn it; we simply need to embody it. If we live in
power is absent without the context of body expectation.
honor of our values and desires, we open up so many possibilities to true wealth.
ADOPT UNCONDITIONAL LOVE When I asked about the long term effects of body acceptance, Kimmay shared an experience she had recently. Her friend was leading a women's circle in the practice of Ho’oponopono: I’m sorry. Please forgive me. Thank you. I love you. Kimmay realized she was immersed in the "Thank you, I love you" part, which she attributes to doing the work of inner acceptance.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
A self-proclaimed dysfunctional perfectionist, Sarah Bachelder is learning to accept and embrace life as is. She seeks the beauty and vulnerability of living in daring imperfection. After watching her oldest son battle Leukemia, Sarah believes passionately that we humans are capable of thriving in all circumstances. Connect with her on Instagram @sbachelder. Photos by Melinda Garrick
Connect with Kimmay WEBSITE
HurrayKimmay.com ï… @hurraykimmay INSTAGR AM
THE MOVEMENT
More Than My Numbers
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– KIMMAY CALDWELL
P H O T O by M E L I N D A G A R R I C K L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
A RT W O R K by @ CR A F T I VAT ECT
to align your innermost thoughts with your ever-evolving perspective
I L L U S T R AT I O N B Y A M Y M C N A M A R A , @ A M O S C AT F I S H
Wild Flowers As Winter persists, remembering that new growth is taking place underground brings hope and dimension to an otherwise bleak outlook. As you plan and dream your year to come, imagine yourself walking in the yield of these goals, as abundant and magical as a field of wild flowers.
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Caring for myself is not selfindulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival. – AUDRE LORDE
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LIVE
Mind Body Soul THE DIMENSIONS OF SELF-CARE with
Casee Marie
With mindful awareness, we can discover the most
SELF-CARE FOR THE MIND
empowering self-care practices for our lives.
I pamper my mind through compassionate journaling and
I
creativity. I might write letters to myself or dive into a 've never been a bath person, but as the self-care trend grew I really wanted to be. My first attempt - with candles, a bath bomb, a glass of wine, music, a book, and
essential oils - proved to be less glamorous than Pinterest and Instagram had led me to believe. For one thing, the water got cold fast. Also, juggling a paperback above water isn't the easiest thing when you're constantly maneuvering for a comfortable position!
soothing art practice. Nurturing my mind comes through therapy, reading, and attending to the balance between negative and empowering beliefs. The more challenging, stimulating self-care can be in the shadow work I do with my therapist and the rigor of creative projects I choose to pursue. Through each process I practice active self-compassion, which is an integral part of caring for myself.
Self-care is a way of showing deserved love to ourselves, but that doesn’t mean it has to be synonymous with treating ourselves to some indulgence or a luxury. There are layers to
SELF-CARE FOR THE BODY
a fulfilling self-care practice: while some days may call for a
It took me a bit of time and exploration to understand what
joyful break from reality, others might require me to really
self-care practices I respond best to physically. A pampering
show up and champion myself through difficult times.
session, for me, includes natural specialty soaps and decadent lotions applied in a mindful self-massage, essential oils
When you think about self-care, how many times are you
diffusing, and other sensory elements, like a curated playlist.
inclined to think of physical stimulants? A massage, a manipedi, a morning run? Our bodies need self-care, of course, but so do our minds and our souls. Each of these aspects of our beautiful selves requires loving attention.
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T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
I also nurture my body through mindful eating, a component
through the ups and downs of our life experiences, the way we
of my self-care practice, or a restorative yoga flow. Stimulating
celebrate joy and cultivate gratitude.
self-care comes from time spent in nature, hiking or earthing, or letting myself go in a joyful solo dance party.
We can expand our self-care practice to take us into many different areas of life, even right outside of our comfort
SELF-CARE FOR THE SOUL
zones. While pampering soothes, nurturing sets the stage for growth, and when nurturing leaves us empowered we can step
As an empath, I’m a deeply soulful person. Solitude is my
into self-care activities that stimulate us in mind, body, and
gateway to the spirit, so I take care to reserve private time to
soul alike.
settle into my soulful self-care practices. Pampering my soul means rest, meditation, sleep, and plenty of time unplugged.
Consider where self-care might be showing up for you in ways that you take for granted. How can you add more of that to
I nurture my soul through ritual, whether I’m pulling oracle
your existing practice? What can you explore that will invite
cards or meditating on my intentions and chosen crystals. I
your practice to expand?
even find spirituality to have stimulating components, from reading books by my favorite teachers to learning how to read the Tarot.
Casee Marie is an intentional poet, amateur photographer, and artist
living in Connecticut. Under the moniker of Hope & Harbor she writes
poems and prose that encourage a deeper relationship with compassion and vulnerability. When she isn’t creating, she’s likely hanging with her
Self-care isn't just about having compassion for ourselves during times of discomfort; it’s in the way we carry ourselves
rescue pup, Blaze.
Photos by @createherstock
Take a Breath. Are you ready to feel inspired and more alive in your body and soul? Are you ready to step into your true power and free yourself from limiting beliefs? Want to feel whole and complete exactly as you are right now? Begin the journey to your truest self by scheduling a free connection call at lydiamandell.com. Conscious Connected Breathwork, Shamanic Healing, Movement, Coaching.
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LIVE
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LIVE
The Benefits of Coworking C O M M U N I T Y, C O N N E C T I O N , A N D T H E C R E AT I O N O F W E A LT H with
LaKay Cornell
Coworking spaces can connect you to people who better understand your work/life blend. FA C E Y O U R L O N E L I N E S S For as long as I can remember, the people I hung out with came from the place I worked. Starting as early as when I was sixteen, my friend circle was primarily comprised of people that I worked with. These people understood my life differently than anyone else I knew, and we had a lot of time together to get to know each other. Sometimes our schedules were different than most—when I waited tables in my 20’s—and it made sense to spend our free time together because it was simple. Sometimes the nature of our work was hard for other people to relate to—when I worked for Planned Parenthood in my 30’s—and it made sense to decompress with people who understood. During those years, we shared celebrations for birthdays, weddings, and new babies. We mourned together when a relationship ended, or when someone lost someone close to them. Many of those people I still keep in touch with to this day. And more times than not, I’ve been grateful for a job I had solely because of the friendships I’d walked away with. Naturally, then, the hardest part of starting my own business in 2012 was losing that sense of built-in connection. I found myself lonely and longing for the days of grabbing someone from the office to get lunch or meet for happy hour. I’ve discovered, though, that this feeling of loneliness – of being separate – can be alleviated by coworking. continued on next page
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wine at 3 p.m. in a client meeting, or are rocking the yoga pants/ messy bun look multiple days in a row. If you decide you want to work from home during the summer when your kids are out of school, you can just pause your membership. Also, a co-working environment holds no space for the general negativity of an office environment: complaining, gossiping, or being interrupted. People who spread negativity are generally asked to leave. At the same time, socializing and connection is encouraged. By design, there’s easy access to potential collaborators, and as much opportunity to be social—if/when you want it. For women, in particular, coworking spaces offer a muchneeded think-outside-the-box approach. Coworking spaces,
S AY G O O D B Y E T O T H E O F F I C E
by their very nature, are pushing back against corporate and
Coworking is defined as sharing workspace and amenities, such
money. As a result, they are helping many of us welcome
as Wi-Fi, a printer, a fax machine and the like, when people
patriarchal ways of doing work, having meetings, and making abundance – in all of its forms – into our lives!
don’t actually work for the same company, but instead are selfemployed or remote workers. In contrast to shared office spaces, coworking is a space that is set up to house people working for different companies, or their own company, to share amenities and resources. Unlike the cohesive “office” image, coworking spaces look and feel differently from location to location. There are coworking spaces built specifically for tech people, creatives, artists, or digital nomads. There are coworking spaces designed just for women; or around a theme, such as social justice or startups. New coworking spaces are opening every day, and, in larger cities, coworking spaces are expanding at an annual rate of 20%! From multi-location coworking spaces, to massive 25,000 sq. ft. + coworking spaces, to intimate spaces the size of your average one-bedroom apartment. Once thought to be a passing trend, the growth and continued popularity of coworking is actually a direct answer to a need presented by modern life. By this time next year, as many as 40% of the workforce could be working remotely. In the U.S. alone, approximately 1,000 new women-owned businesses are opening every day. These are the people who find coworking attractive.
I N V I T E A B U N D A N C E T O S TAY AW H I L E Just as wealth itself is multidimensional, the environments in which we are working to create wealth can be multidimensional. For entrepreneurs, in particular, creating and working in a space that brings abundance to us in many forms is critical. I’ve found that energy in coworking spaces. The culture of coworking, and the spaces where coworking takes place, has helped me enjoy my whole life more than if I were to work from home or out of a coffee shop. Coworking spaces have given me the power to choose an environment that supports my dreams, as well as a place to bring those dreams to fruition. Although I made many many friends through various jobs, the inherent sense of community that comes with a coworking space was lacking. Additionally, I always felt isolated by the strict trajectory for advancement that existed or the unacknowledged glass ceiling that hung over me. Joining and participating in coworking spaces has brought together the best of both of my worlds. I am constantly surrounded and inspired by people who are getting it done – the
L E AV E Y O U R E X P E C TAT I O N S E L S E W H E R E Because they are full of entrepreneurs who are juggling a
dreamers and the doers; more than just friends, these people have become as close to me as my own family.
growing business while managing their life, coworking spaces connect you to people who understand life is different than what it once was. There’s no expectation of a set schedule, or preferences to “be at work by 7 a.m. and hit the gym by 3.” No one in a coworking space thinks twice if we leave early to pick up kids, skip out at lunch for a yoga class, have a glass of T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LaKay Cornell is the founder of Champagne Hippies, which helps entrepreneurs, small business owners and corporate leaders increase profits + impact by incorporating their values into their business decisions. She is a speaker, consultant, advocate for conscious capitalism, and serial collaborator. Photos by Casee Marie @oneofthefolk
"Just as wealth itself is
multidimensional, the
environments in which we are working to create wealth can be multidimensional."
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Le vital corps Salon Sonic comfort + conversation for women who don’t have time for BS or burnout
Hosted by
Kara Martin Snyder
thebravefilespodcast.com
vitalcorpswellness.com
Uplifting Podcasts to Listen To
motherhood, identity, & the messy stuff in between T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
– TIFFANY CLARKE HARRISON P H O T O by @ K E L L E Y R AY E _ L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E
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B E FOR E and
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
AF T E R MY UNEXPECTED JOURNEY TO STRENGTH, CONFIDENCE, AND JOY
Words by
Ericka Mulhall
Photography by
Connie Schiano
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LIVE
Five years ago, my life became divided into two parts. In the “before,” we thought we had it all. I married a wonderful man; I had the job I'd always wanted; we had the dream house, the trips all planned out, and our beautiful son. We were gloriously happy.
A
nd then...we didn’t have him and everything felt dark.
Early in my grief journey I found myself in a yoga class, scared,
I became trapped in my sorrow—a mom without her
vulnerable, feeling nearly naked in front of these women who
baby—while life moved on. I was told I was strong, but
seemed to have it all together. “Let go of the details of your life,”
that sounded (and felt) absurd. I didn’t feel brave to have said goodbye to my only son. It didn’t feel strong to have watched him pass in my arms. Getting out of bed didn't feel courageous, nor did holding, or being held, by my husband. We did it because we
the instructor said. Did she know? Who told her I was there? Unexpectedly, this became a turning point in the part of my life I've come to think of as the “after.” Why in the world I went
had to.
to yoga that day, I will never know. I looked around and didn’t
Only now, years later, after experiencing and moving through a
was the biggest release I’d had in weeks. For one whole hour,
loss that no mother should have to go though, am I able to see
I could breathe.
the strength others saw. The woman I was “before” is not the woman I am now, in the “after.” Now, I am stronger and bolder, full of joy, and living a purpose-filled life.
see anyone I knew. But following the instructions to “let go”
And so began a journey to myself again. After many hours on my mat, a new me emerged. My strength built physically, preparing me for the day emotional strength would return. Letting go is hard. Once I realized that I could—for one hour—I started to heal. I cried in many of those first hours—a release more healing than I knew tears could be.
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
I go to yoga every week: it’s my hour, my time to breathe, my medicine, my personal therapy and a requirement for my health. My mat is my space; no one can change what happens there but me. Sort of like my future, where no one can decide what I do but me. Though this positive path felt like going against the current of my life, I chose to take it. Letting life take me along with it didn’t seem a viable option anymore. When I don’t go to Yoga often enough, I am holding my breath for too long, even now, 5 years later. My whole body is tense. Instead of standing still, I go, go, go. Not until I re-challenge my mind to rest and step away can I relax once again. Namaste. I bow to my own heart, my mind and my body.
Grieving the loss of my son was the darkest time of my life. I remember
I am forever grateful to my body for giving me two
very clearly someone saying to me that there would be light in my life
babies, for being strong enough to endure pain and loss.
again. I laughed out loud at that statement. Light??! Are you insane?
I bow to myself for the strength to keep showing up
Even as I reacted, I knew that deep down I was a forever mother. I was
week after week. I am as strong as I need to be: stronger
made to be someone’s mom.
than yesterday.
With the birth of Eloise, my heart opened again. I loved someone so deeply that I could let my grief go. I will be here in every sense that she needs me, whether physically or emotionally. She lets us be us
Then, one day, a light returned to our lives in the form
again, to laugh when something’s funny and cry when we are still sad.
of a sweet, sassy, brave little lady. My daughter was born
She has brought so much happiness to so many who knew and loved
in June of 2015, on my husband's birthday; we would
our son.
celebrate my and our son’s 2nd birthday just one week later. My son's spirit is alive in Eloise—all of his sweetness, with all of her own flair. A perfect combo.
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I might hold my daughter just a little bit closer and have more
Soon, I felt the desire to change my life. Wanting more time
sustained fears than the average parent, but I also know and
with my daughter, I searched for a career path that allowed
value my limits. I know that I’m a better mom when I have
me a flexible schedule. Since becoming an entrepreneur, I’ve
separation from Eloise and motherhood, in general. I don’t
discovered a passion to show other women that their strength is
believe that being a mother is what solely defines me anymore.
within and like mine, it’s been there all along.
My girl has made me realize I want to be a better me. I want
When Eloise was 6 months old it became ever more clear that
to provide for my family in ways that my mom couldn’t. I want
I was missing the most important moments because I was at
to let go of the guilt I have over being gone so much. I want to
work all the time. While I am professionally trained as a nurse
forgive myself for not seeing that my son was sick sooner. I want
anesthetist, I am more than that. The loss of my son helped me
to give her all the love that she deserves. And I want her to know
to realize that I have so much more to give than what I had been
that life is precious and she is incredibly lucky.
doing within the hospital walls.
I think of my son every day. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to
Traditional was always boring to me. I am drawn to things a
have him in my arms. Still, I believe that Kellan would want us
little different and not afraid to try new things. Admittedly, even
to be happy. I choose to bring his memories with me as we move
until college I was shockingly shy. This is a particularly hilarious
forward in our lives. I will never fully recover, but I can choose to live in a more joyful space.
conundrum to me, as I now run a virtual business that hinges on socially connected commerce and often find myself doing the
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unexpected on social media. At the same time I find it strangely
If I were to have forecasted my life ten years ago, certainly a
cathartic to do so.
struggle with grief wouldn’t have been in there. Nor would
When I started my business, I began pouring my heart out on social media: unashamed, unapologetic, and unafraid. Telling the deep, messy parts of my story allowed me to connect
owning a business and maybe not even yoga. Now, I can’t see my life going forward without each of these. Each aspect of my life feeds the other part of my heart and mind.
with other women like myself. Each post and new interaction
When I am stressed or anxious about life or my work, I turn to
healed me a little more. Our stories are a gift, and sharing them
yoga. When I am feeling like I need assurance that I will have the
can be both a source of freedom and a powerful example to
time that I need with my family, I look towards my business. All
other women.
of the answers come back to Eloise because my babies are the
As an independent consultant for a major company, I've
reasons for everything I do.
found a vehicle through which I help to ensure that women's
As each year has passed since that day that I left my boy behind,
reflections in the mirror match how they feel on the inside. I'm
I have gained a new sense of who I am in the “after.” First there
also building a brand that is authentic to my own voice. I get
was me, then there was me with yoga, then there was me, yoga
to mentor and positively influence women from all over the
and Eloise, and now I have Eloise, yoga and a business that I
country and—as my business grows—the globe.
love. And I’m infinitely grateful for all that I have and who I
My confidence is a mystery to me some days, but through my
have become.
business and the connections with other women, I have found true happiness, despite the missing part of my heart. My son and his short time on this earth changed me. It’s my mission to never forget that his story and this opportunity that I have is his legacy to me.
Ericka Mulhall is a dreamer, a romantic, a yogi, an avid crafter, a wannabe gluten-free pastry chef and lover of thrift stores. She lives in WI with her rainbow daughter, husband and 2 fur babies where she uses her strength and inner fire to curate the life she thought she couldn’t reach. Follow her movement on Facebook or @ej.mulhall.em. Photography by Connie Schiano
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
LIVE
THREADS OF I NTU I TI ON Briah Luckey
Art is the practice of trusting my intuition, of having faith that the threads I follow lead where I need to go, through what I need to go through. Each mark I make as I paint, print, or draw is a thread to which I say yes. Each yes is a practice of building trust. As I commune with the source energy that connects me to humanity and nature, the thread of being alive leads to an awe of life itself.
Briah was featured in the 2001 issue of Connecticut Magazine as one of 30 influential people under 40 because of her vision to use art to create community connection. She has exhibited her own art in Connecticut, in New York City, and in Washington, DC. She offers an intuition supporting art group for moms at her studio in New Haven. BriahLuckey.com/moss
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@SBACHELDER
@DEBRACOWIE
@JESSICAMMCCASH
@BRIAHLUCKEYSTUDIO
@DESIGNSBYKATYROSENTHAL
@FUNKAESTHETIK
@MUDLARKPOTTERY
@TULUSA.GOODS
@MIXEDOTHERDESIGNS
# I H AVE T H I S T H I N G W I T H PAT T ERN S
You’re multi-dimensional. Why shouldn’t your aesthetic be dimensional too? Pattern-mixing is a practice that can be applied to your wardrobe, your art collection, your table-settings—even when you eat! Step 1 is to choose the patterns that speak to you and it gets easier from there. So: get out there and explore your inner pattern-diva, and tag us @theperpetualyou because we love patterns!
T h e PE R PE T UAL YOU
MO N T H LY MA N T RA
M A N T R A b y K R Y S TA L B R A N D T P H O T O by @ R E P R E S E N TAT I O N M AT T E R S . M E L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E
P H O T O by @ B E T T I N A M A Y S T U D I O S , L E T T E R I N G by @ D E S I G N S Q U E E Z E