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Revolutionize and Reset Your Thinking In 21 Days
Dr. Lovella P. Mogere
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Š by Dr. Lovella P. Mogere the author of Revolutionize and Reset Your Thinking In Just 21 Days. Revolutionize And Reset Your Thinking In Just 21 Days, Dr. Lovella P. Mogere retains sole copyright to her contributions to this book.
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Table of Contents Introduction...................................................................................7 Day 1.............................................................................................8 Change Your Thinking..............................................................8 Day 2............................................................................................11 Self Improvement....................................................................11 Day 3...........................................................................................14 Self-Awareness.......................................................................14 Day 4...........................................................................................15 Gratitude.................................................................................15 Day 5...........................................................................................17 When Will Things Get Better?................................................17 Day 6...........................................................................................19 Conquer Your Fear..................................................................19 Day 7...........................................................................................21 De-clutter Your Mind..............................................................21 Day 8...........................................................................................23 You Are Significant................................................................23 Day 9...........................................................................................25 Life Is A Gift..........................................................................25 Day 10.........................................................................................27 You Are The One You’ve Been Waiting.................................27 Day 11..........................................................................................29 Wherever You Are, Be There.................................................29 Day 12.........................................................................................31 Perception...............................................................................31 Day 13.........................................................................................33 Get A New Perspective ..........................................................33 Day 14.........................................................................................35 Have An Open Mind...............................................................35 Day 15.........................................................................................37 Words Are Seeds ....................................................................37 Day 16.........................................................................................39 Will Excuses Be Your Defeated Foe? ....................................39 Day 17.........................................................................................41 Old Pain Reopen Wounds.......................................................41 Day 18.........................................................................................43 So You Need Approval? ........................................................43 5
Day 19 ........................................................................................45 Time Wasters...........................................................................45 Day 20.........................................................................................47 Get Unstuck!..........................................................................47 Day 21.........................................................................................49 Your Esteem............................................................................49 Books by Lovella Mogere...........................................................51
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Introduction “Reset Your Thinking 21 Day Challenge�
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t's a new year, a time for new resolutions, setting goals and revamping one's lifestyle. A time in which you're reinventing yourself, and envisioning a futuristic you.
But, it goes beyond that. It requires a new mindset, new rules in communication, a shift in perspective ‌ from word to visual. It's time to evaluate, be selective of the information that you receive, and put together the pieces that will form a new picture of the future YOU. This 21-day challenge will impact mindsets as they pertain to business, politics, government, ministry and your personal lifestyle. It's time to Reset (set again or make different) Your Thinking. Experts recommend that we cleanse our minds regularly from toxic thoughts that build up and hinder us from a positive outlook, just as we detox our bodies to eliminate toxins. The more you reset - set again or make different - your thoughts by putting into practice intentional thinking, the easier it becomes, and soon your new mindset will be an intrinsic part of you. Become the futuristic YOU. Dr. Lovella P. Mogere
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Day 1 Change Your Thinking “There is a law in psychology that if you form a picture in your mind of what you would like to be, and you keep and hold that picture there long enough, you will soon become exactly as you have been thinking.” —William James
Reset You Thinking!
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ou will become exactly what you have been thinking. What are your thoughts about the futuristic you? Did you know that your thoughts
control what happens to you? Thoughts help you create your reality your experience. Whether that experience is good or bad, all of them are determined by your thoughts. Thoughts dictate your emotional state. They affect your health. Thoughts even influence what you do and say to people. No matter what the situation or circumstances, everything you do stems from thought. Then, the thought turns into feelings, which turn into actions.
Would you believe many of our thoughts are 8
centered around worry? Sometimes, we are not aware of this, nevertheless they are. When we worry about something, we have no control over it. What is actually happening is that our fear has been turned inside. Usually, this is a result of some type of mental programming that tells us about all the bad things that will happen, even before the event happens. In order for you to become productive in life, you must learn to control and change your thoughts. And, because thoughts turn into words, we must learn to use the right types of words to correspond with that which enters our minds daily. Also, remember that not all thoughts produce actions that lead to results. The only thoughts that will elicit results are those that are predominating. Because our thoughts are powerful, and can dictate what happens to us, we must learn to control and change them. But, what happens in situations when we start thinking negative thoughts? This happens to all of us from time to time. You may be in a very stressful situation, and find that you are thinking the worst worst-case scenario, instead of thinking positively. While you are thinking negatively, emotions come into play and accompany those thoughts. You begin to panic, and our heart races. You start thinking of things clearly imagined, and you become
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irrational. What can you do in this situation? At this time, you will need to stop, remind yourself of the Law of Attraction, and get your thinking back on track. So what should you be doing at this very moment? Remove and change negative words from your vocabulary (e.g., “ever,” “can’t” and “try”). Identify those times when you tend to use negative words. If you say something negative, follow up that statement with a positive one. For example: “I just can’t run.” Follow up: “I can run in the park or on a treadmill.”
Start today and write each positive affirmation thought that you have choose chosen on a whiteboard throughout the day.
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Day 2 Self Improvement “Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.”― George Bernard Shaw
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tillness, which is the loudest, your thoughts or your soul? Which cries for your attention? Though you cultivate your gifts, don't starve your soul. Too
many times we build, cultivate and nurture the imagery of which we are, and forget the soul. You and your soul are one. When your soul is empty your mind wonders, not being open and willing to learn and consider all pieces of information; like a child discovering something for the first time. As you develop knowledge and expertise, your mind naturally becomes more closed. You tend to think, “I already know how to do this”, and you become less open to new information.
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There is a danger that comes with expertise. We tend to block the information that disagrees with what we learned previously, and yield to the information that confirms to our current approach. We think we are learning, but in reality we are steamrolling through information and conversations. We are waiting until we hear something that matches up with our current philosophy or previous experience, and information to justify our current behaviors and beliefs. Most people don’t want new information, they want validating information. Here are a few practical ways to begin your selfimprovement. 1. Get moving- Inactivity is beat only by movement. Once you get going, momentum builds up and inertia is no longer a factor. 2. Ignore failures-We will always give in to temptation. Plan for it, accept it, and move on. There’s no need to beat yourself up. 3. Motivate yourself. Most importantly, you want to really want it. It’s not enough to feel pressure to do something; you have to really desire it. I mean, really desire it, not just think it’s something you should do, or that you’ll be a better person for doing it.
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4. Be accountable. Laziness, the second perpetrator, is beat by a bit of public pressure. We all get lazy from time to time (or, to be more honest, all the time), and there’s nothing wrong with that. But to beat laziness, we must apply a bit of pressure, in the form of accountability. Reset your thinking, read something inspirational, such as a devotional, self-improvement or self-help book for 30 minutes. Write each positive affirmation you choose on a whiteboard, or a notebook throughout the day.
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Day 3 Self-Awareness “Don’t dwell on what went wrong. Instead, focus on what to do next. Spend your energies on moving forward toward finding the answer.” –Denis Waitley
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elf-awareness means you are in touch with yourself, with your feelings, your actions, and your desires. Having a clear perception of who you are, your
strengths, weaknesses and your beliefs, allows you to understand how others perceive you, and helps you understand others’ reactions to you, as well. The more you develop your self-awareness, the better you are able to direct your own path, and adjust your thoughts and actions to align with your goals. Resetting your thoughts is one of your 2016 goals. This is a great time to focus on something you’ve been putting off. Now you can create a detailed plan on how you will finish it.
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Day 4 Gratitude "Let gratitude be the pillow upon which you kneel, to say your nightly prayer. And let faith be the bridge you build to overcome evil and welcome good.� -Maya Angelou
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e aware of your feelings and how you savor this gift in your imagination. Take the time to be especially aware of the depth of your gratitude.
Rest Your Thinking requires daily gratitude exercises resulting in higher levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, optimism and energy. Additionally, your gratitude makes you more likely to help others and achieve your personal goals. Research has proven that practicing gratitude reduces fear, anxiety, high blood pressure, and heart disease. Bottom line, gratitude can extend your life. Take the time today to begin your gratitude journal. Take it one 15
step further and write down 5 things that you're grateful for, and tell a close friend. Let me recap. Your gratitude results in ‌ 1. Less depression and stress 2. Higher levels of alertness 3. More enthusiasm 4. More energy
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Day 5 When Will Things Get Better? “We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey.” -Kenji Miyazawa
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top waiting for different results with the same pattern of thinking and methodology. Everyone’s circumstances are different, but in a society where
hope can seem unattainable, it can be easy to come to the conclusion that things can’t get better. No matter how dark your circumstances are, life is happening. Even as you cope with all that has changed and what you may have lost, do you take the time to see how much you have? This is a good time to count your blessings. Hope is "confident expectation”. Hope is a firm assurance regarding things that are unclear and unknown. Your present day truth (reality) will conflict with your subconscious (your perceptions) of yesterday. For a greater
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you, your greater mind must embrace change for a better outcome. Hope helps us push through some of the toughest times in our lives, and gives us the strength to get to that finish line when we don’t think anything else will. We’re all human beings who make mistakes, and have to live our lives the way in which they were meant to happen. Allow your hope to propel you into the unknown, the next chapter of your life. No matter who you are, no matter what you did, no matter where you’ve come from, you can always change and become an improved version of yourself. Let's face it, many great things can be done in a day, if you don’t always make that day tomorrow. Don’t let your fear of making a mistake stop you. A life spent making mistakes is not only more enjoyable but more useful than a life spent doing nothing. Things will get better when you start to live life without regrets.
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Day 6 Conquer Your Fear "Energy and persistence conquer all things" -Benjamin Franklin
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ear is an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or is a threat. Fear is in the
background, an it convinces us we can never accomplish our dreams, tells us to keep quiet, and separates us from the ones we love. Fear suffocates us, and it has an unparalleled ability to freeze us in our tracks, and limit what we are willing to try. Fear makes us lead a mediocre life. It's time to face your fears. It is important to note that some fears are healthy, while some situations should be avoided for your own personal safety. There are no hero points awarded for going into a personally threatening situation. However, if the threat is more mental than
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physical, actually doing the thing that you’re afraid of can be the best antidote. Don’t forget that it is often easiest to do this in steps. If your biggest fear is public speaking (and it is for the majority of us) don’t offer to address the room at the next stock director’s meeting, but do try something smaller. Consider leading your next departmental meeting, or give a small talk at your next group meeting, something with a small audience and familiar faces; then, work your way up from there. Facing your fears is a process. You, and only you, can face them.
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Day 7 De-clutter Your Mind “Clutter is the physical manifestation of unmade decisions fueled by procrastination” – Christine Scalise
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mind that sometimes cannot find the calm that we so desperately seek is a cluttered mind. There’s something a lot worse than having a cluttered
home or workspace, and that’s having a cluttered mind. A cluttered mind is restless and unfocused. It tries to move in many different directions at once, and the result is that very little gets done. A good way to start is by resetting your thinking, and clear out some space in your head. You can get started by following the 10 ways to de-clutter your mind, and free up mental space, which follows: 1.
De-clutter your physical space – (physical clutter
leads to mental clutter) 21
2.
Write your thoughts down – (write what’s stored in
your brain) 3.
Let go of the past – (let go of the mistakes, the guilt)
4.
Stop multitasking (organize/de-clutter any area of
importance) 5.
Keep a journal – (download your inner chatter)
6.
Monitor the amount of information coming in (stop
the overload of information) 7.
Be decisive (make a decision)
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Prioritize – (focus on what’s important) Have a regimen about your day – plan and organize
the details of your day. Learn to meditate – focus the mind. Mental clutter leads to congestion in our inner world. It gets in the way of us being able to think clearly, and to focus on what really matters. This year begin by Resetting Your Thinking.
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Day 8 You Are Significant “I’m still thinking and hoping there’s an opportunity for people to have better lives and that significant change can occur.” –Tracy Chapman
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Reset Your Thinking! ou may have been rejected by the other kids at school, never fit-in with the crowd, and always felt like you were different. This may have
caused you to believe that there is something wrong with you. It may have made you afraid of getting close to people. It may have made you more introverted than you naturally are. Or you may have heard a lot of criticism and negative talk from the people closest to you. This may have affected your self-esteem, making you feel worthless. You may live in fear and doubt your ability to do anything. You may struggle to accept the unconditional love of God. Or you may have had experiences when someone has broken your trust, taken advantage of you or abused you. This may 23
cause you to be cold and hard-hearted towards people, building up barriers to prevent anyone from hurting you again. Trusting others and even God may be really challenging for you. Know This! The Creator made you in His image and He does not make mistakes. When He created the world, He saw that it was good. When He created male and female, He saw that it was very good! When you were born God saw that you were very good! You were created by Him, for His glory. Say a prayer today. Ask God to show you your significance and write them down.
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Day 9 Life Is A Gift “God predetermined the destiny of my life, the moment I was conceived in my mother’s womb. All the distractions of life, never prevented God to fulfill His purpose for my life.” ― Lailah Gifty Akita
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f you take your life seriously, you truly understand and appreciate each day is a gift. Sometimes, because our life is so busy, we forget how fragile life is. It is so
ironic that we get a glimpse of this, when someone is dying, diagnosis with a chronic disease, or when we see or hear something terrible happening around us. But, in the here and now, we tend to forget to live life to the fullest. Quality of life should not be quantified, nor should it be compared to another's. Your life itself is the best gift ever. It is a precious gift, nothing more, nothing less. Unless you understand this truth, you can waste it and take life for granted.
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Appreciation goes a long way. Avoid complaining today (crazy traffic, have a bad hair day). When you find yourself getting ready to complain, instead, say something for which you’re grateful.
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Day 10 You Are The One You’ve Been Waiting
“Just keep coming home to yourself. You are the one you’ve been waiting for.” – Bryron Katie
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Reset Your Thinking! ife wants us to see that all of the qualities and experiences that we are longing for are outside of ourselves. As we grow, and evolve life has its way
of letting us see the reality of things. As awareness takes place, and cycles are broken over and over again, and dimensions of present day truth are revealed, we begin laying a new foundation. This doesn’t mean we don’t need anyone or anything outside of ourselves, but it means that we truly get it, that the power for everything we want begins with US. What you’ve been waiting for to get you to the next level, the next phase in life, begins with you. Though you’re waiting on people, you fail to realize that it is your substance, intellect, skills, and talent that draws people of your caliber. So, why wait for something to happen or for a 27
specific someone? You can create it now, because the resources to do it are within you.
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Day 11 Wherever You Are, Be There “Perhaps the most “spiritual” thing any of us can do is simply to look through our own eyes, see with eyes of wholeness, and act with integrity and kindness.” – Jon Kabat-Zinn
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s we go through the day, we may find ourselves focusing
on
past
experiences
or
future
possibilities. We are so involved in yesterday
and tomorrow that we never notice that today in slipping by. We go through the day rather than getting something from the day. We are everywhere, at any given moment in time, yet we are not living in the present moment of time. Wherever you are, be there, stop living in the past. Stop bringing your past into your future. “Just be where you are, when you’re there”. Maybe you are not there yet, because you’re getting over your past. Instead, of dwelling on it, look at where you are now, and how far
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you’ve come. Not only are you closer to your goal than when you started, but there are many things to be grateful for all around you that you do not want to miss.
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Day 12 Perception “We must not allow other people’s limited perceptions to define us.” –Virginia Satir
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Reset Your Thinking! he way that you interpret your life experience creates your identity. So, what does it take to become the best version of you? Why are you so
hard on yourself? From the time you were born, you’ve received both positive and negative messages from your surroundings. All those messages indelibly programmed into your subconscious to create your belief system. They become the filters through which we create our reality … our selfimage, acting on them as if they’re true. While they don’t change the world around us, they filter our life experience until we believe them to be true. You become the person you think you are. If you think you’re someone who will never amount to anything… 31
guess what? You’re right. These beliefs and how we respond to them become your “head-space!” What exactly is headspace? Head-space is that place in your mind where your thoughts, (both positive and negative) and judgments about yourself and your environment combine to create your reality. So, are we doomed by our perceptions of the past? Can we never get out of our negative head-space? Of course, we can! But it takes work. You can improve your headspace and improve the quality of your life. If you believe you are a person who cannot succeed, then success will evade you. You will subconsciously create failure as a selffulfilling prophecy. If you believe you are a person who can succeed, then you will act accordingly! Again, this becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy!
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Day 13 Get A New Perspective “The world is a tragedy to those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” ― Horace Walpole
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Reset Your Thinking! ou know what the real enemy to happiness is? It’s not sadness, or failure or fear… it’s complacency. It’s becoming so comfortable with
just being comfortable that we stop trying to make things better. We even stop trying to make things different. . We go on and on, satisfied with being good enough, and we don’t realize that nothing is really all that good, until we wake up one day and find ourselves miserable. Sometime, before we reach that point, there are chances, windows that can be thrown open to let in some fresh air and sunlight. Changing your life doesn’t always mean turning your entire world upside down; sometimes it’s just about getting a new perspective about yourself, and the world around you.
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Take time to be quiet and meditative. Open yourself to receiving guidance and new information about your life. Simply by having the intention to be open to receiving guidance can often set off a new stream of experiences, naturally directing your next steps on your path to greater prospects.
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Day 14 Have An Open Mind “The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.” – Terry Pratchett
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eing open-minded can be really tough sometimes. Most of us are brought up with a set of beliefs and values, and throughout our lives, we tend to
surround ourselves with people who share the same values and beliefs. Therefore, it can be difficult when we’re faced with ideas that challenge our own. Though we may wish to be open-minded, we may struggle with the act of it. One of the scariest (and greatest) things about seeing the world through an open mind is that one must be vulnerable and transparent. In agreeing to have an openminded view of the world, you’re admitting you don’t know everything, and that there are possibilities that you may not have considered. This is the perfect time to consider RETOOLING (equipping) YOURSELF. Be spontaneous, 35
have new experiences, challenge your beliefs to do something out of your norm. It can be very liberating to look at the world through an open mind.
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Day 15 Words Are Seeds “Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” –Napoleon Hill
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eeds are powerful and have great potential for good or harm, depending on what is locked up in the seed. Seeds have limited potential, but God’s have
unlimited potential. That is why it is important we speak God’s words and not just our own. We do not know how the seed grows but it does! God speaks in outcomes and then the processes are released to manifest that. We are to plant God’s outcomes in our heart and continue to water our faith in those outcomes by our confession of faith. The growth process works the same towards the bad as well as the good. So many people have deeply rooted
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problems in their life because of wrong believing and wrong confession. They have believed a lie and have spoken in line with it so long that it is deeply rooted in their lives and bearing a lot of bad fruit! You can uproot these wrong plants by renouncing the lies and by beginning to sow good seeds and watering them. It will not happen overnight but it can start today.
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Day 16 Will Excuses Be Your Defeated Foe? “Leadership is about taking responsibility, not making excuses.” –Mitt Romney
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he dangers of excuses ... Excuses are devastating to
marriages,
businesses
and
relationships.
Excuses will cause you to become self-focused and
selfish. Excuses cause you to lose sight of your purpose, missing the mark for your life. Excuses justify where you are - complacency. Excuses validate mediocrity, causing one to validate why they are broke, stagnated and nonprogressive in their life. Excuses, are
beginning projects, books, business,
ministry with excitement, and not finishing them. Excuses champion a defeated outlook and mentality. Will excuses be Your defeated foe? The adversary is not to blame; rather it is simply one’s way of thinking. Excuse is he language of victims. Are you still a victim of your circumstance? Know 39
this, the problem is not the pain of trial, and it is not the trial itself. It is our response. What will your responses be today? Stop the excuses, and respond to the situation at hand with an open mind. Let today be the day. Write down what you have been avoiding, what you didn’t confront, what needs your attention, then pray, ask the Lord to guide you, and give you ways to handle the situation gracefully.
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Day 17 Old Pain Reopen Wounds “Turn your wounds into wisdom.” ― Oprah Winfrey
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Reset Your Thinking! hat horrible pain that you are feeling right now will go away, since time heals everything. Just keep that in mind and don’t beat yourself up if you
still haven’t managed to get past your former relationship, even if you broke up with your partner quite some time ago or there was a disagreement between you and your closest friend, time still heals all wounds. Sometimes it’s not so easy to walk away when that unfortunate event leaves some pretty nasty scars on your emotional well-being. Sometimes, love fades and there’s nothing you can do to change that. There’s no point in wondering obsessively about what happened, what you did wrong or what you could have done to prevent it, because most of the time it’s nobody’s fault if you have outgrown
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your partner or that friend, these things just happen. It’s time to move on and leave the past behind. 1. Give yourself time will heal –give yourself enough time to heal 2. Learn to forgive –him/her for what was said/done 3. Write a letter –say everything you wanted to say to end the madness 4. Have a symbolic ceremony –get rid of clothing, pics, delete texts, SAY GOODBYE! 5. Empty Chair –say what you wanted to say, get it off your chest 6. Don’t forget yourself –time to build self again #appreciate self 7. Apologize – for your wrongdoing, then forgive yourself
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Day 18 So You Need Approval? “Courage, not compromise, brings the smile of God’s approval.” –Thomas S. Monson
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pproval is like a killer drug (it induces stupor or insensibility to your identity). You approval seeking becomes addictive, and you quickly
develop a need for more. When you have a need for approval you value the beliefs, opinions and needs of others above your own. Their opinion of you is far more important to you than your own view of yourself. Receiving
disapproval
becomes
a
painful
(heartbreaking) experience. Your entire decision-making processes are eventually taken over by your need for the approval of others. You cannot take any decisive action without their approval. You’ll sacrifice your own dreams and ambitions in order to have their approval. Why? You 43
may argue that you do not engage in approval seeking behavior. However, there are common behaviors that you may fail to recognize as approval seeking. Do you? 1. Change your position, because someone appears to disapprove 2. Pay insincere compliments to gain approval 3. Feel upset, worried, or insulted when someone disagrees with you 4. Express agreement (verbally or non-verbally) when you do not agree 5. Do something which you do not want to do, because you are afraid to say ‘No’ Behavior that is contrary to your identity and purpose, or conflicts with your core beliefs, is generally done to gain the approval of someone else. One of the easiest ways to avoid approval seeking is to live a life that is true to your own values and true to yourself.
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Day 19 Time Wasters Better three hours too soon than a minute too late.” –William Shakespeare
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Reset Your Thinking! o you have a “time-waster,” of which you are guilty? Mine is being on the Internet too long. I find that if I go online at the end of my workday
or at least until I finish the most important tasks of the day, I am more productive and less likely to “wander” around in cyberspace. Time is a very precious resource. The fact is that regardless of how well you manage time, at the end of a day, you will still only have had 24 hours. In one year there are still only 8,760 hours. The key is using your time efficiently and eliminating time wasters from your day. Your attitudes and behaviors affect how you use your time. Below are some examples of ineffective use of time. By substituting what’s not working for you with a more effective behavior
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and/or attitude you’re on the road to managing your time. You can start with: 1. Less Interruptions/Distractions 2. Organizing and planning your day 3 Implementing ... stop putting off things to doprocrastinating 4. Being easy on yourself, lighten up perfectionist 5. Stop trying to do everything yourself 6. Evaluating the task – take on only as much as you can handle 7. Having a crisis management plan in place 8. Limiting your socializing (have a time frame) 9. Retooling yourself if you’re lacking in skills Time is of the essence. This is the time to be more productive, more efficient. Stop wasting time. Take the time to reflect, access and document how and where you’re wasting your time.
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Day 20 Get Unstuck! “I need to find creative diversity because if I get stuck, I get unhappy.” –Jill Scott
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he year has just begun. Do you feel you hit a plateau in life? Do you feel like you’re going through a phase that lacks significant progress?
Are you still trying to figure out what to do with your life? Some people refer to this as being “stuck in a rut.” I just call it stuck. And once identified, sometimes it’s a mystery as to how to get unstuck. Your lackluster outlook might have you encountering a sense of “blah” - not happy or depressed, or you are just not content and are craving something different. You might also feel exhausted, offtrack, unmotivated or worried. All of those are normal experiences that you may not give much thought to when you’re at your best, but every once in awhile these
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unwelcome little obstacles catch up and it’s a struggle to move forward. So what do you do to get unstuck? My number one job as a Leader is supporting people as they move forward, primarily because they’re stuck, stuck in jobs, relationships, health and more. So here are some ways to help you get out of a rut: 1. Face your fears - What exactly is stopping you from moving forward? 2. Define your goals – run a vision board workshop at the change of every season, because one vision board per lifetime (or year, even) is never enough. 3. Set a reward for breakthroughs –Determine shortterm milestones and rewards. What are your turning points? Once you apply these steps above, you will have a sense of direction. Your will break significant barriers and become unstuck making new achievements. Take one step at a time in order to come out of the rut you’re in.
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Day 21 Your Esteem “Confront the dark parts of yourself, and work to banish them with illumination and forgiveness. Your willingness to wrestle with your demons will cause your angels to sing.� -August Wilson
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Reset Your Thinking! ow self-esteem is a negative evaluation of oneself. This type of evaluation usually occurs when some circumstance we encounter in our life touches on
sensitivities.
We
personalize
the
incident
and
experience physical, emotional, and cognitive arousal. This is so alarming and confusing that we respond by acting in a self-defeating or self-destructive manner. When that happens, our actions tend to be automatic and impulsedriven; we feel upset or emotionally blocked; our thinking narrows; our self-care deteriorates; we lose our sense of self; we focus on being in control and become selfabsorbed.
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Self-esteem is not set in stone. Raising it is possible, but not easy. Your self-esteem grows as you face your fears and learn from your experiences. You can start by doing these steps. 1.
Practice self-care. Make new lifestyle choices by
joining self-help groups and practicing positive health care. 2. Stop and take notice. Pay attention to the familiarity of the impulse. Our tendency is to overreact in the same way to the same incident. Awareness of the similarity can be the cue to slow our reactivity. 3. Choose response. Hold self-defeating impulses. Act in a self-caring and effective way. By choosing to act in a more functional way, we take a step toward facing our fears. Your Esteem is the building up of your self. Begin today by practicing self care, pay attention to your impulses and choose carefully your response to every situation.
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