Raising Healthy Happy Kids by Specialty Publications

RAISING HEALTHY, HAPPY KIDS

SUNDAY, AUGUST 26, 2018

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Table of Contents

Raising friendly children

A gentle approach to discipline

Interaction is the key to early child development

Cut the bull: Strategies to help kids deal with bullies

Understanding your shy child

The health info you need in an emergency

10 12

Closing the ‘word gap’

34 36

How to get kids to wear sunscreen

The importance of fathers

A deadly game: How to talk to kids about suicide

6 decades of picture books

40 Why aren’t parents using allergy pens?

Keep calm: Ways to avoid losing your temper

Kids, cash & snacks: Teaching children about money, healthy choices

Screen-time strategies for parents of young children

Healthy eating behaviors to model for kids

The new storytellers: How video games can improve a student’s writing

Is your child prepared to stay home alone?

Building a grandparent-grandchild relationship from a distance

Is caffeine safe for kids?

COVER PHOTO: istock.com INSIDE PHOTOS: istock.com

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“Knowing that we can be loved exactly as we are gives us all the best opportunity for growing into the healthiest of people.” -Fred Rogers

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Raising friendly children By Melissa Erickson,

GateHouse Media

miling at parents and inquisitive about the world around them, babies seem inherently friendly. As children age, though, friendship is a skill that must be honed and developed.

The best kinds of people are caring, sharing and helpful. Helping children become friendly people will make them happier, more well-adjusted and healthier physically and mentally, said parenting expert Michele Borba, author of “Unselfie.” Friendship matters, and it’s not just about who gets invited to a sleepover or to sit at a table in the lunchroom.

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“People who are able to make friends tend to have better relationships and marriages. They have better and more long-lasting success. They can collaborate and figure things out. They end up being more employable. They develop empathy for others and have improved self-esteem,” Borba said. While some children make friends easily, others struggle with the skill. “Starting around age 2, kids have to practice — so those playdates really do matter,” Borba said.

Teach them how to greet people in person and on the telephone. Say, “Hi, my name is Melissa” while looking them in the eye and shaking their hand. Borba used to make a game of it to practice with her children: She would ring the doorbell and have her child answer the door, and they would introduce themselves as if they were strangers.

COACH FRIENDSHIP

Here are some of her tips to help teach a child friendship skills:

“Like other skills, friendship skills have to be refined through trial and error. A good coach doesn’t just give a player a ball and say, ‘Now go throw it.’ They practice, model behaviors and rehearse what to do,” Borba said.

TEACH THE BASICS

TAKE THE TIME

Little things matter when it comes to friendship. “Teach your child to smile and say hello. That’s a universal friendship skill,” Borba said. Encourage a child to look people in the eye. If that’s difficult for a shy child to do, tell them to look at the bridge of the person’s nose, Borba said.

As kids get older and more involved in sports and extracurricular activities, friendships can get squeezed out. “Is your child’s schedule filled with soccer practices and coding lessons? Look at the calendar and add friendship to the agenda. Kids need time to relax and be with others. Take the time to do it,” Borba said.

MODEL FRIENDSHIP “Parents, you’re powerful than you think,” Borba said. If you model good friendship skills, like speaking politely to a waiter, your children will imitate the behavior.

START A CONVERSATION Communication is key when it comes to friendship. Teach kids conversation starters that can help when they meet new people at summer camp or at the swimming pool. After greeting a new friend, kids can say things like, “I like to play baseball. What do you like to do?”

POINT OUT POSITIVE PRACTICES At the playground, mall or anywhere else, parents can point out when others are being good friends. “Look! That boy is helping his friend. Isn’t that nice?” Or, “See, she’s asking if she can join the game.”

MANNERS ‘Please’ and ‘thank you’ matter. They get your kid more invites by other parents and you raise a well-mannered child,” Borba said.

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Interaction is the key to early child development By Kim Doleatto, spirecolab.com

any new parents are concerned with their infant’s physical needs and might be missing out on the rapid brain development quietly taking shape as babies try to unravel the world around them. While research indicates that reading to children from day one can have positive lifelong effects on learning and comprehension, it’s the oneon-one interaction inherent in sharing stories that is crucial. Dr. G. Pat Wilson, associate professor of the School of Education at University of South Florida Sarasota-Manatee, has been a special education teacher, reading specialist and elementary grade teacher.

Q What do many parents misunderstand about early learning and reading? A Sometimes, as a parent you’re thinking, “they’ll learn at school.” But

associate your words with the music they heard in the womb and they start to hear the individual words and as they grow and acquire language, the growth is exponential. When the environment is language-rich, we pick up the patterns of language, the more interaction, the more growth. We’re really geared and born to learn to language.

Q Is reading the silver bullet for lifelong learning? A If you think there’s one formula, you don’t recognize the power of other actions. Part of it is helping parents and caregivers enjoy language and reading and sharing that. We can’t say that going to the grocery store and pointing out things isn’t valuable. Reading for 15 minutes a day may not beat that out. All of these moments combined….it’s all literacy. So talk while you’re fixing dinner. Those moments count.

without parents, school isn’t enough. Especially when there are summers or reasons for absenteeism. Parents need to know the importance of keeping their kids in touch with words and ideas and keep them engaged. They’re little geniuses wired for learning.

Making connections between concrete experiences in everyday life and words on a page or a picture in a book makes it easier for kids to learn comprehension. Point out plants, then read about them or find them in a picture and talk about them.

Q What can parents do to get kids to read and build language skills? A All the kinds of things you do in talking to your child and pointing

Words on a page, on their own can sometimes be too abstract for certain learners. Dr. James Gee, a literacy expert, said “you’re not gonna understand something if you only read. You only understand stuff to the depth of your experience.”

Start from day one. Don’t think they don’t understand. They may not understand individual words, but they understand you’re talking to them, they know your tone. It doesn’t have to be formal.

I think children need to realize through words, they control a bit of their environment. If they say “Mama,” they get your attention. They learn that their language is an important way for them to understand their world. It gives them a voice. When I say something, there’s a response. There’s security in that.

things out, those moments are so powerful in building language. It’s all about interaction.

Many parents don’t realize that even though their child isn’t talking, they’re absorbing and discerning and learning rhythm. Even in the womb baby hears the music of language. They know it. After they’re born, they

It’s gotta be really hard for kids who cry and there’s no response. It’s all about interaction.

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Understanding your shy child By Melissa Erickson,

GateHouse Media

alking into a new classroom, joining a new team or meeting new people can be difficult for many kids, but especially for children who are shy.

Parents can help their shy kids overcome the butterflies of any new situation and learn how to build relationships and function better socially. “The most important thing to know about shyness is that it is a coping strategy for dealing with high sensitivity and introversion,” said Michael Reist, an educational consultant in private practice who specializes in working with highly sensitive children. His most recent book is “Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys.”

NOT A DISORDER Labeling or calling out children for being shy can make them feel bad about themselves. “Shyness is not a disorder or disability to be treated or cured. It is symptomatic of a beautiful character trait — an ability to observe keenly and to feel deeply,” Reist said. For parents, a child’s shyness may be something they want to change, but there is positivity in shyness. “We live in a world that favors the extrovert. We need introverts, too. They see and hear everything. They pick up on information that other people miss. They are slow but steady deliberators. They are often wise beyond their years,” Reist said. Susan Cain, author and co-founder of the “quiet revolution,” believes introverts are undervalued especially in America. “Parents shouldn’t overprotect quiet children, but they should understand that these kids have a longer runway before they’re comfortable enough to take off and fly,” said Cain. Her book, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking,” posits that one-third of people are introverts or people who would rather listen than speak.

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Closing the ‘word gap’ By Kim Doleatto, spirecolab.com

tudies have shown that by age 3, children from lower income families hear far fewer words than those from higher incomes. This “word gap” is a problem because a word-rich environment is key to a foundation of learning, early language acquisition and future reading skills.

Ellen Galinsky — author of “Mind in the Making” and consultant for a free app called Vroom that helps parents spur early learning — shares some insight into the word gap that may affect close to a fifth of kids in the US.

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Q What drives you about the study on the word gap? A The sample was small, but one of the main points was about quality of language. We learned it’s not about drowning kids in words. It’s the back and forth, meaningful conversations that are important. Even if baby can’t talk yet, do this. When you point out a car outside the window, it’s not “car, car, car,” it’s asking “what’s that?” “It’s a taxi.” “What color is it?” We’re always talking about extending the conversation, regardless of age.

Q Are parents surprised to learn about the gap? A Some parents are. The cultural assumption about learning is that

babies don’t learn language until they can talk. And often learning is seen as memorizing words and numbers, but it’s giving those things meaning that counts.

Q How does Vroom help close the word gap? A We’re all busy and many parents are overwhelmed. Time and money can be scarce. So what Vroom does is get families in the moment; during feeding, getting dressed, waiting in line or during a ride. That’s why in building the Vroom app, one of the rules was that the activities had to require no time, tools or money. Income doesn’t have to be a determinant in language acquisition. When you don’t have enough money or when you live in a neighborhood where you feel less safe or you’re not sure where the next meal is coming, there are still people who really connect with their kids.

Q Other than using tools like the Vroom app, what are some best practices parents and caregivers can adopt to close the word gap? A Playing is learning. Ask kids questions throughout the day: “How many steps do you think it would take to get to the door?” Estimation is really valuable in learning. You’re building on their curiosity and also enjoying the mystery of learning. Also, talk to babies. Talking in something we call “parentese” is found to be helpful. It’s when you talk in a sing-song voice that includes real words, and repeat what baby says back to them, that’s important. Being bidirectional is key. It helps babies process sounds. Remember, it’s not pouring knowledge into an empty vessel, it’s building connections. Also, using gestures is a huge part of language. When adults use gestures, it helps kids make sense of their world by diversifying communication. One misconception is infants can learn through media but they really learn best in the context of relationships when something is meaningful.

Q Does having a second language in the household slow down word acquisition? A Learning a second language is good for cognitive flexibility. Some people who don’t speak English as a first language will hold on speaking with their children since they assume that their broken English might harm their learning. But it’s good to speak the language you’re most comfortable with with your child. More language is a good thing. And if there aren’t reading materials around in your first language, make up stories or look at pictures and talk about them.

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Building a grandparent-grandchild relationship from a distance By Brian Ries, GateHouse Media

ccording to the Pew Research Center, almost 40 percent of grandparents communicate with their grandchildren once a month or less. And almost 80 percent of the time, that contact is by phone.

Grandchildren, parents and grandparents can do better than that, and they should. A 2016 study from Boston University showed that strong relationships between young adults and grandparents result in fewer symptoms of depression for both groups. Other studies have linked close grandparent-grandchild relationships with fewer behavioral problems, reduced impact of adverse experiences and fewer difficulties with peers in children. For grandparents, relationships with grandchildren can result in exposure to new ideas and perspectives, which has been shown to increase mental acuity in older adults. And numerous studies have shown that a strong network of social connections, including that with

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grandchildren, is crucial for both quality of life and an increased lifespan. Basically, grandchildren and grandparents who share a strong relationship are happier, smarter and live longer. Everyone wins. When a grandparent lives tens (or thousands) of miles away maintaining that close connection can be difficult, but it’s easier now than it ever has been before. Here are five ways to get started. A few involve simple technology that may be daunting for some grandparents, but getting your kids and grandkids to help you can be part of the bonding experience. (Just try not to turn them into your personal on-call IT service.)

VIDEO CHAT Kids, especially teenagers, can be less responsive or easily distracted during a phone call, but often become engaged when they can see the person they’re talking to. There are plenty of easy services to use for video chats — Skype, Google Hangouts and Facetime, to name a few — and once you get the hang of it, it’s just as easy as dialing a phone. Try to arrange a fixed time every week for a video call, but be flexible since kids tend to have robust social calendars.

ONLINE GAMES There are plenty of games available that you can play together from afar (which you can easily pair with a video chat), with no need for the grandparent to learn the intricacies of a first-person shooter. Checker, chess, card games, word games and more complicated board games are

available as apps or online. Some require you to play in real time, while others can extend over a day or a week of intermittent play, which allows both people to dip in and out when they have the time (or want a little connection).

FANTASY SPORTS LEAGUES You might rethink your relationship with your grandchild the next time you want to trade for a player and they say no, but fantasy sports leagues are a great excuse for keeping in touch. You can chat, text or email during games; talk smack about your performance; and accept victory (or defeat) graciously. You can even bring in other family members to participate, depending on how viciously competitive your family is. There are numerous websites that allow you to join or host a league.

PEN PALS Never underestimate the impact of an actual letter arriving in a mailbox, especially now that it is such a rare occurrence. For younger kids, decorate the outside of the envelope to the hilt with stickers, artwork and plenty of color. You can even fill the envelope with confetti or sparkly glitter (although that might not endear you to your children). For older grandkids, corresponding via snail mail allows them to write on their schedule, and many might find it easier to open up without the embarrassment of expressing serious thoughts or feelings in person or over the phone. Grandparents can make it easier by sending some self-addressed

stamped envelopes, or even giving their grandkids a stationery set.

TEXT FUN Texting isn’t often about serious thoughts or important conversations, but it is perfect for maintaining a steady flow of contact between grandkids and grandparents. Send jokes you hear, pictures of strange things you see, or random thoughts about shared interests. One grandparent set up a weekly photo scavenger hunt with his grandchild, with each picking five things that had to be found and photographed before the end

of the week. And if you’re really desperate, you can always play 20 questions.

PLAN A TRIP Depending on your resources, planning a trip together can be a great bonding experience. You can share ideas on places to stay, research and share potential activities, and make lists of things to remember before you embark. After the trip, you can create shared photo albums and brainstorm ideas for the next vacation. Not to mention, you actually get to spend time in the same place for a while.

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The importance of fathers By Kim Doleatto, spirecolab.com

Dr. Ronald B. Mincy knows the importance of fathers in the early development of their kids, and the social landscape that sometimes fails to recognize their crucial role. He directs the Center for Research on Fathers, Children and Family Well-Being, is an investigator of the Fragile Families and Child Wellbeing Study and a faculty member of the Columbia Population Research Center. He’s also an advisory board member for Transition to Fatherhood at Cornell University, the National Fatherhood Leaders Group and author of “Failing our Fathers”.

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Q Do children benefit from having a father or father figure in their lives?

A Yes they do. I know this from data about the opposite. On a range of outcomes, like the likelihood of graduating from college, scoring well in school and cognitive development overall, we see a lack of father presence as a risk factor.

Q In what ways do fathers impact early child development? A It appears that fathers of young children, if they’re focused on talking and reading with their kids, tend to improve their kids’ behavior. We find they’re less likely to express aggressive attitudes, for instance. Also, moms do a lot of the caregiving, whereas father interactions center on play, and play is essential in early learning. Dad’s physical play tends to help them exercise executive function: to be in control and modify their behavior when needed. Rough and tumble play is an opportunity to learn boundaries, for instance. With fathers we see that they tend to talk to their children more like they would with adults rather than using baby talk. As a result, those children tend to have a larger lexicon. When children have words, they can ask for what they want and they’re better communicators, which directly mitigates frustration when the child wants or needs something, for instance. If fathers are engaging with their children, the positive effects on lexicon and academia are increased. They become faster learners in school and are more ready to learn once they start kindergarten.

Q How can we help fathers have the most impact on their child? A From the policy and program point of view, fathers must be

encouraged to read to their child, particularly when less educated people are the audience, since they tend to think that because kids don’t understand the words yet, they won’t benefit. Programs are not emphasizing enough on making connections with kids even before they become toddlers and that’s the most powerful time: zero to three.

Q How can we help support fathers? A Make men and women more aware about how parent stability

affects kids.

Research shows when the father is engaged in the birthing process, there’s less infant mortality and less cortisol production in mom that can affect the baby in utero. Even things like talking and singing to the baby in utero shows gains in early development – dad can do that. Dads can do anything from getting the home prepared, to getting the oranges like I did – my wife craved them during her pregnancies. Studies also show that parents are co-conspirators in their child’s outcomes. When one parent adopts a healthier habit, the other tends to copy. And those investments affect a child for a lifetime.

Q How can fathers be the best at their role? A Be committed first. Even if mom and dad are unmarried, when mom and dad get along, kids have better lifelong outcomes. Engagement of nonresident fathers is even more important since children with nonresident fathers are more at risk for achievement gaps at school and beyond. Research shows a father’s involvement in the first three years is more important than what happens after the child is nine, since their ability to become self learners is actualized before three. Investments in those years have endless benefits and parents need to know the child needs both of you to maximize their potential.

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6 decades of great picture books B y this point, it should be clear to parents that reading to children, especially in early childhood, has enormous benefits.

Beyond helping to increase their vocabulary and create a love of books that will serve them throughout their life, reading to your child is an act of love. You snuggle up close and share an intimate experience, creating a bubble around you that is all about the story, and each other.

For many people, the picture books that were read to them when they were a child stay with them, treasured memories that they want to share with their kids. Many people of all ages still have a few of their favorite picture books tucked into bookcases or stored away with keepsakes. The best picture books stand the test of time, the art and stories just as relevant and inspiring now as they were when you were a kid. Here are some of the best picture books from the past six decades. Some will spur happy memories, while others might encourage you to create some new memories with a beloved child.

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1960s

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1970s

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1980s

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1990s

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2000s

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2010-

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Keep calm: Ways to avoid losing your temper By Melissa Erickson GateHouse Media

t could be talking back, eye-rolling or any other kind of defiance that causes a parent to lose his or her temper, but these emotional encounters often leave both parent and child feeling bad.

It’s crucial for good parenting to learn how to deal with your own triggers and keep your cool. Parenting expert Sarah Ockwell-Smith, author of “Gentle Discipline,” understands it’s easy to slip into old patterns of shouting and punishing. Here are some of her tips for parents to help avoid losing one’s temper.

Recognize triggers “In many ways you have to re-parent yourself as well as your kids. Watch for triggers, too. Are you more likely to yell when you’re tired, hungry or just plain exhausted? Sometimes parents need to schedule some emergency self-care,” Ockwell-Smith said.

Strategies to calm

else fails, take a parental timeout. Leave the room and breathe until you feel calm enough to return to your kid, she said.

Avoid automatic responses The next time you feel yourself about to automatically respond with a “no” or “stop,” ask yourself why you feel the need to do so. “Very often we discipline subconsciously on auto-pilot,” Ockwell-Smith said. Being more mindful about your own responses and asking, “What’s the worst that would happen if I said OK?” is far more positive, OckwellSmith said.

Be consistent “If you have a particular boundary — let’s say taking your shoes off at the front door — then you always need to stick to that. Inconsistency is confusing for kids. If you let that boundary slip, even once, what you’re saying is ‘sometimes you can do this, sometimes you can’t — so it’s worth testing me,’” Ockwell-Smith said. It’s OK to make mistakes

Being a good parent means taking care of yourself, too.

When you lose your temper, apologize to your child.

“Take time away from the kids where you nurture your body and soul. For me, I know when I need self-care because I turn into angry yelling mom with a short fuse. In the moment, the best way to respond is to remind yourself your kid is probably feeling bad, too. This works for any argument actually, even with other adults,” Ockwell-Smith said.

“Messing up and apologizing teaches them what to do when they make a mistake,” she said.

Try to imagine how your kids are feeling and attempt to empathize. If all

Then, try to work out why you lost control. “Try to see messing up as a learning opportunity. It’s all good if you learn from it,” Ockwell-Smith said.

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Screen-time strategies for parents of young children By Brian Ries, GateHouse Media

n the past six years the amount of daily screen time hasn’t changed much, according to Common Sense Media, a nonprofit organization dedicated to helping kids thrive in a world of media and technology.

Problem is, that amount is still higher than recommended and the quality of what kids see on those screens is often lower than it should be. And parents are often not aware that their child’s screen time could be a problem. Though children’s media use changes from year to year with the advent of new technologies and devices, and experts alter their recommendations about how much and what to watch, there are some general guidelines that parents can use to make certain that screen time is safe, productive and healthy for their kids.

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Think of healthy screen use the same way as healthy eating. You want your child to consume high quality food, and not too much of it, with the occasional treat thrown in for fun. It’s the same with screen time.

programming per day. Children (and adults, really) should not have any screen use for at least an hour before bedtime.

And just like with food, be aware that your child is always looking to you to learn how to behave. If you’re always checking your phone, not only will you lose opportunities to interact with your child, they’ll use that as a model for future behavior.

Why the limits? Studies have shown that more screen time means more risk of obesity — each extra hour of screen time increases that risk. Screen use before bedtime can cause problems with winding down and preparing for sleep, as well as reduce the quantity and quality of sleep your child gets.

QUALITY

PARENTS

Not all educational programs, games or apps are created equal. Check reviews on sites like Common Sense Media for apps, television programs and movies before introducing them to your child. Research has shown that even “enhanced” or “interactive” ebooks may actually decrease comprehension of the story, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAC).

Not only should you avoid using screens as an emotional pacifier for your child, making sure that your child has a healthy interaction with screens requires some extra work on your part. Finding the right programming is part of it, but so is participating in your child’s screen time. Parental interaction is key to early childhood development, so watch with them, help them understand what they are seeing and make connections so they can understand how what they saw interacts with the world around them.

QUANTITY The AAC recommends that children under the age of 2 get no, or extremely limited screen time (aside from video chatting). Parents should limit children ages 2 to 5 to only an hour of high-quality screen

Kids are always watching you for cues, so make sure to model good behavior. Don’t keep the television on as background noise, put devices away when it’s time for dinner or other scheduled family time and know that the less you are distracted by your screen, the better interaction you’ll have with your child.

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The new storytellers:

How video games can improve a student’s writing By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

an zombie-filled video games teach kids to write better? New thinking says yes, according to a professor who sees comparisons between literary heavyweights like Shakespeare and Hemingway and engaging video games such as “World of Warcraft” and Telltale’s “The Wolf Among Us.” Parents need to express caution for young children and violent video games, but if you’re not familiar with what’s on the market now you may be surprised. “Many of today’s video games parallel the greatest literature in history, with an added immersive experience,” said John Misak, New York Institute of Technology English professor. The best games can provide 30 hours of narrative development, he said.

TODAY’S GAMES HAVE STORYLINES Traditionally, teachers have encouraged students to read more to become better writers, but some of today’s video games can be a useful tool to help kids understand concepts of storytelling and characterization and improve narrative skills, Misak wrote in an article in the Science Research Association’s Journal of Education. This educational concept came about as video games developed graphically, and players became invested in the characters. As programmers were able to move beyond the “zombie eyes” effect to make the characters more relatable, users searched out a more realistic experience, which in turn pushed the narrative element, Misak said. Not unlike reading “Hamlet” or “The Old Man and the Sea,” playing a video game like “The Last of Us” offers students the ability to analyze and evaluate morality, actions and consequences, and relationships.

According to Misak, video game exercises can allow students to develop an understanding of narrative skills that transfers across curricula, and even students who have no experience with games can find interest in this alternate universe. Having students play video games or even watch YouTube videos of games during classroom instruction and homework assignments can also be a valuable tool in providing visual learners a critical eye for other works of narrative, including literature and film. “Students learn differently, and for visual learners it’s often a matter of ‘don’t tell me, show me,’” said Misak, who has taught since 2003 but previously reviewed video games.

MISAK’S PROCESS To get a writing project started, Misak may play the opening sequence of the game “The Last of Us,” a zombie apocalypse adventure. “Students’ mouths literally open,” Misak said. Then he asks students to take over from the character. What does the reader need to know? What happens next? What details catch your interest? What do you want to know more about? “Video games allow new writers to gain a sense of place and to understand the difference between simply seeing their surroundings and experiencing them,” Misak said. “In turn, their writing composition also becomes immersive, allowing the reader not only to read the details of a story’s setting, but to feel them as if they are actually there.” Parents shouldn’t be afraid of video games, but pay attention to what their kids are playing. Ask them questions, play together and make it a bonding experience, Misak said. “The key thing video games can encourage are inquisitiveness and how to investigate narrative,” he said.

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A gentle approach to discipline By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

arah Ockwell-Smith knows that parenting is hard work, even in the best of times. The latest in her series of parenting books explores a gentle approach to discipline.

“Gentle discipline is about conscious, mindful decisions,” Ockwell-Smith said. Her approach aims to change not only a child’s behavior but also the parents’. Instead of looking for quick and easy fixes, “it’s all about understanding and shaping,” Ockwell-Smith said.

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How it’s different

Many traditional approaches to discipline see it as a way to punish or shame a child to motivate her to behave better, Ockwell-Smith said. “Methods such as time-out and punishments originated from work on laboratory rats and an era when children were seen as inferior, manipulative little beings, who should not be loved too much. Science has frequently disproved these theories and current understanding of neuroscience, or brain development, has shown that mainstream discipline is not only ineffective, but potentially damaging to children, too,” she said.

Show mutual respect “Gentle discipline is conscious and mindful, by that I mean that today’s generation of parents are increasingly seeking to break the cycle of harsh discipline with which they and their parents before them were raised. They want better for their kids. Most of all though, gentle discipline is about working with — not against — your kids. It’s about showing them empathy, respect and compassion and gently guiding them to be the people you hope they will be,” Ockwell-Smith said.

Why time-outs don’t work “The most important thing parents need to understand is that kids don’t misbehave for no reason,” said Ockwell-Smith. “In almost all cases poor behavior is caused by an unmet need or the kid feeling bad. Kids who feel good don’t act bad.” A time-out may temporarily stop the poor behavior, but it doesn’t deal with the cause of it. “A better response would be, take some time-in with the kid and talk through their feelings, reassuring them,” Ockwell-Smith said.

When a kid tantrums, a parent must think about the safety of the child and others.

Another problem with time-out is that it presumes kids will spend their time thinking about what they did wrong and how they can do better next time.

“After that, you need to support them. Sit as close as they will allow and let them express their feelings. Show them you understand by naming what they feel — ‘You’re really angry that kid wouldn’t share his ball with you.’ This not only shows compassion, but helps children to learn what emotions are called,” Ockwell-Smith said.

“This requires a level of concrete thinking that we know is not developed in the brain until 7 to 11 years of age. At most a kid in time-out learns to be quiet so they are let out, but that’s all,” she said.

A better way to deal with a tantrum Parents may not want to hear this, but “tantrums are normal and common,” said Ockwell-Smith, who likens a tantrum to a pot of boiling water soon to overflow if no one intercedes. “Toddlers don’t tantrum because they enjoy it or because they’re trying to manipulate us. They tantrum because they can’t do anything else.”

Be your kid’s role model “How you react at this point is what they will copy. If you’re angry and yell, they will do the same. If you’re calm, they will eventually be, too,” Ockwell-Smith said. “Finally, offer to help them calm down, maybe with a hug, talking it through, using a really simple breathing exercise or playing a game. Just try to remember you’re on the same team. You may feel awful when your kid tantrums, but chances are, they feel even worse.”

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Cut the bull:

Strategies for helping kids deal with bullies By GateHouse Media

t least one in four American children will experience bullying at some point during their school years and children with disabilities are twice as likely to be bullied, according to the National Center for Education.

Even those who are bound for celebrity status as award-winning actors can experience bullying. “Growing up, my disability made me a target for bullies,” says RJ Mitte, who portrayed Walter “Flynn” White Jr. on the AMC series “Breaking Bad.” Like his character, Mitte has cerebral palsy. A former patient of Shriners Hospitals for Children, Mitte has partnered with the organization to promote its 2017 #CutTheBull anti-bullying campaign.

The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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“I was harassed, knocked down and even had my hand broken,” he recalls. “Now I have an opportunity to give a voice to people with disabilities and promote acceptance.”

Understanding bullying Twenty-eight percent of children in grades 6-12 say they’ve been bullied, and 70 percent of young people say they’ve witnessed someone being bullied at their school, according to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. While cyber-bullying grabs headlines, it’s actually the least common type of bullying; verbal and social attacks are the most common. Bullies tend to target children who are perceived as different, which is why children with disabilities are at greater risk of being bullied. Physical vulnerability, appearance and social or emotional difficulties, can make children with disabilities easier targets for bullies. According to DHHS, “persistent bullying can lead to or worsen feelings of isolation, rejection, exclusion and despair, as well as depression and anxiety ...”

Cutting the bull Standing up to bullies is the best way to stop bullying, experts agree, whether the person who stands up is the victim or a bystander. In fact, when a witness to bullying speaks out, the bullying stops within 10 seconds, 57 percent of the time, the DHHS reports. Through the #CutTheBull campaign, Shriners Hospitals for Children offers some guidance for parents and kids to prevent and stop bullying: Parents should teach (and model) the three R’s of anti-bullying: Respect, Reach Out and Respond. Children should try to look beyond differences to see and respect everyone’s abilities and value. They should talk to, get to know and include someone who may be different, or who is being treated differently. Finally, if they witness bullying or experience it themselves, kids should speak out and tell an adult. l

Help children identify ways to respond to bullying, either as the victim or as a bystander. For example, children who are being bullied could choose to walk away and ignore the bullying, calmly tell the bully to stop, or act bored and disinterested in the bully’s words. Children who witness bullying can tell the bully to stop or inform an adult. l

Encourage children to take up activities they enjoy and that give them an opportunity to meet others with similar interests. Activities can help children build their self-confidence and create friendships that will help protect them from being bullied. l

Help children understand that bullies are looking for an emotional

response from their victims. Acting confident not only helps children feel more confident, it can deflect a bully’s interest. Practice confidencebuilding and calming exercises with kids, such as taking a break when they’re feeling upset or breathing in and out to relieve stress. Research bullying policies in your school and anti-bullying laws in your state, so you know what resources are available to you.

“It’s time to embrace our differences,” Mitte says. “It’s time to accept people for who they are. It’s time to cut the bull.”

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The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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The health info you need in an emergency By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

n an emergency it can be hard to think clearly about your kids’ health information. The best bet is to have medical information handy just in case.

According to KidsHealth, parents should keep a complete written or computer-based medical history that includes: Allergies: Note if your child is allergic to medicines like penicillin or antibiotics, or certain foods, dyes or contrast materials that may be used in medical tests such as CAT scans. Information about allergies can help medical responders narrow down the cause of symptoms such as hives or breathing problems. Medications: Include over-the-counter medicines and those prescribed by a doctor. You should be able to tell a medical responder when the last dose was taken. Pre-existing conditions: Emergency personnel need to know if your child has a pre-existing condition such as diabetes or asthma. These conditions can affect the testing and treatment your child receives. Children with chronic health problems should wear an identifying tag on a necklace or bracelet. Also be sure to include any previous surgeries or hospitalizations.

of them. If you need help compiling info to list, your pediatrician’s staff will be able to help. Weight: Be knowledgeable about your child’s weight, which medical professionals need to know to determine medicine dosage. In an emergency there may not be time to weigh a child. Family history: Doctors may ask about family history of illness, such as sudden heart problems, to diagnose a current problem. Share info: If your child is cared for by family or other caregivers, be sure this medical history is available to them. Also include the name and phone number of your doctor and dentist, as well as health insurance information.

Use these handy medical records organizers The Ahh Hah Medical Records Organizer Kit includes pre-printed index tabs, attractive cover and spine and a table of contents page.

The portable, compact personal health record, My Body Passport, is a complete logbook for medical info, broken down into a series of prelabeled check boxes and forms. Includes a clear book jacket and holder magnetized for the fridge.

My Child’s Health Record Keeper includes tips and reminders and plenty of space to record medical history for school, camp and change of doctors.

Immunizations: In addition to keeping your child up-to-date with immunizations, keep a clear history

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How to get kids to wear sunscreen By John Sucich, GateHouse Media

months they should be using a broad-spectrum SPF 30 or higher with any ultraviolet exposure.”

e all know how important it is to wear sunscreen during the summer months. But parents also know the act of getting kids to wear sunscreen can be a struggle.

Gohara says exposure to the sun includes everything from children being outside for an extended period of time to as short as a quick walk.

“Starting before the age of 6 months, parents should try their best to have children avoid intense sun exposure completely,” says Dr. Mona Gohara, a board-certified dermatologist practicing in Connecticut. “After the age of 6

“Nobody wants you to live under a rock,” she says. “Go to the beach, go to a park, it’s great for the kids — but if you can, between 10 a.m. and 4 p.m., if you’re outside between those hours, play in the shade.”

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APPLICATION TIPS Sunscreen should be applied all over a child’s body before she goes outside. Gohara acknowledges that for parents a spray sunscreen is easier to use, but it can be easier to miss spots, so parents should make sure they take the time to rub it in. She also recommends a stick for areas that can be tricky when applying sunscreen, so lotion doesn’t get in the child’s eyes or mouth. “I really like sunscreen sticks for around the eyes, the lips, the ears,” she says, “places that people forget and later are actually a really common place for more aggressive skin cancers because people forget them.”

“You really want them to develop a habit of it,” says Gohara. “If you make them understand that it’s like brushing their teeth or eating well or getting good exercise, they’ll be much more likely to continue that later into adulthood.”

She also says for children with skin sensitivity issues, parents should do their best to use sun-protective clothing and recommends that when using sunscreen, rather than applying it directly to the child’s skin, they should squirt it into their hands and then rub it on.

Kids “may be a little less threatened by their mom or dad kind of massaging something into their arm or leg as opposed to this gloppy, cold, sometimes smelly substance going onto their bodies,” says Gohara.

MAKE IT A HABIT You want your children to understand that wearing sunscreen is part of keeping themselves healthy. One way to help is a product made in Australia whose bottle turns blue with ultraviolet light exposure, so children know when the sun is strong enough that they have to reapply sunscreen: Blue Lizard products are available at Walgreens, Walmart and other retailers. Otherwise, wearing sunscreen should just become part of a child’s routine.

TOP-RATED SUNSCREEN FOR KIDS The Environmental Working Group’s annual Sunscreen Guide ranks sunscreen based on efficacy and the environmental impact of the ingredients and packaging. They do not recommend sticks, because studies show that some people apply too little sunscreen when using sticks.

HERE ARE THEIR TOP-RATED SUNSCREENS FOR 2017: Adorable Baby Sunscreen Lotion, SPF 30+ All Good Kid’s Sunscreen, SPF 30 All Terrain KidSport Sunscreen Lotion, SPF 30 Aveeno Baby Continuous Protection Sensitive Skin Lotion Sunscreen, SPF 50 Babytime! by Episencial Sunny Sunscreen, SPF 35 Badger Baby Sunscreen Cream, SPF 30 Bare Republic Baby Mineral Sunscreen Lotion, SPF 50 Blue Lizard Australian Sunscreen Baby, SPF 30+ BurnOut KIDS Sunscreen, SPF 35

California Baby Super Sensitive Sunscreen, SPF 30+ Caribbean Sol Sol Kid Kare, SPF 30 Goddess Garden Organics Baby Natural Sunscreen Lotion, SPF 30 Kiss My Face Organics Kids Sunscreen, SPF 30 Neutrogena Pure & Free Baby Sunscreen, SPF 50 Sunology Natural Sunscreen Kids, SPF 50 Sunumbra Sunkids Natural Sunscreen, SPF 40 ThinkSport Kids Sunscreen, SPF 50+ Tom’s of Maine Baby Sunscreen Lotion, SPF 30 TruKid Sunny Days Sport Sunscreen, SPF 30

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Is caffeine safe for kids? By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

ost adults think nothing of grabbing a cup of coffee, soda or even an energy drink, but how safe is caffeine for children? The death of a 16-year-old last year due to a “caffeine-induced cardiac event” spotlights the dangers of caffeinated beverages for young people.

The South Carolina boy consumed three caffeinated beverages in just two hours, which led to a deadly overdose, according to the coroner. While the tragedy was “extremely uncommon,” there’s no reason a child needs to be drinking caffeine. “Teens do not need caffeine,” said Dr. Shan Yin, medical director, Drug and Poison Information Center, Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center.

The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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Normally, “caffeine is very safe. Millions of people drink it every day and have no problems,” Yin said. A safe limit of caffeine for adults is 400 milligrams a day, or about four 8-ounce cups of coffee — or two Starbucks grandes — according to the Food and Drug Administration. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that children do not consume caffeine, and in a 2011 report urged parents to keep children and teens away from energy drinks because of high levels of caffeine.

How can caffeine turn deadly? “Because caffeine is a stimulant, it increases your heart rate and can also increase your blood pressure,” said Ann Condon Meyers, dietitian at Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh of University of Pittsburgh Medical Center. “If you are a teenager with a pre-existing heart condition this may cause a cardiac infarction, or heart attack. In teenagers, there are some rare genetic heart conditions which can predispose a teen to this event by an overdose of caffeine or very strenuous exercise. Unfortunately, some of these pre-existing heart conditions are never diagnosed in children until such a life-threatening event occurs.

Just like adults, kids reach for caffeinated beverages in the belief they will give them a boost of energy. “Beverage manufacturers put caffeine in drinks not because we need it but because once we consume caffeine, we feel poorly when the effects wear off. This is why adults feel that their morning dose of coffee is needed to wake them up when in actuality, the sleepy feeling/irritable feeling is due to a lack of sleep and/or the effects of the drug caffeine wearing off,” Meyers said.

Other sources of energy One of the best way kids can feel more energized throughout the day is to get more sleep, Yin said. “Talk to your kids about avoiding the peer pressure they may feel about drinking caffeinated beverages,” he said.

“Caffeine is now classified as a toxic drug and has negative effects on the behavior and mood of teenagers with other mental disorders,” Meyers said.

“Energy comes from having a healthy body which receives regular exercise and good nutrition,” Meyers said. “Lack of energy generally comes from a sedentary lifestyle, poor nutrition and a lack of sleep in children, teens and adults. Instead of drinks with caffeine, children and teens should consume water and cow milk beverages.”

Possibly the most popular stimulant, caffeine has been linked to a number of harmful health effects in children, including effects on the developing neurologic and cardiovascular systems, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics.

Last word of caution: “When teens are mixing alcoholic beverages with energy drinks, the effects of the two drugs can exacerbate the effects of irritability and put the teen at even greater risk for an overdose of alcohol,” Meyers said.

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The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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A deadly game:

How to talk to kids about suicide By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

dangerous social media game called the Blue Whale suicide challenge may be putting vulnerable youngsters at risk.

Believed to be linked to teen suicides in Russia, central Asia, Europe and South America, the sick challenge is being blamed for leading a 16-yearold girl near Atlanta to take her own life. The Blue Whale Challenge “appears to be an online game and/or app where people are asked to engage in 50 self-harm challenges that culminate with telling the person to kill themselves,” said Penn Medicine psychology expert Thea Gallagher, clinic coordinator at the Center for the Treatment and Study of Anxiety in the Perelman School of Medicine at the University of Pennsylvania. “Parents should know that suicide can affect everyone. Parents should know also that kids can be influenced by peer pressure and may not be aware of the long-term consequences and ramifications of their actions,” Gallagher said. Youth suicide rates are rising, with the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reporting that suicide is the third-leading cause of death among Americans age 10 to 14 and the second among ages 15 to 34. Plus, the number of children and adolescents admitted to children’s hospitals for thoughts of suicide or self-harm more than doubled during the last decade, according to research from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Suicide is a sensitive topic and often one parents are nervous to discuss. “It can be uncomfortable and scary and can make many of us feel out of our comfort zone,” Gallagher said. “The point is that social support and connection are key factors that buffer against suicide. We should strive to find more ways to communicate and connect, even when it is hard or uncomfortable,” she said.

Identify youth at risk Pressures from school and the Internet are commonly referenced as factors that lead kids to try suicide. Identifying kids who may be “at risk is very important. This includes prior suicide attempts, misuse of drugs, family history of suicide or a mental disorder, chronic illness or disability, lack of access to mental health care,” Gallagher said.

Youths who stand out from the crowd face increased pressure. “Stress from discrimination is a known risk factor for LGBTQ youth, and therefore making concerted efforts to reach LGBTQ youth is critical,” Gallagher said.

What to look for The signs of suicide may include but are not limited to suicide notes or plans, making final arrangements, preoccupation with death and changes in behaviors, thoughts or feelings, Gallagher said.

Small groups, big conversations One way to get people talking is to create small groups for children and adolescents to discuss difficult issues like mental health problems, family difficulties, interpersonal challenges and painful emotions. “This is especially important as it is more likely that a child will report something to another child rather than an adult,” Gallagher said.

Creating connections “Helping establish relationships between students and teachers and parents and children can also serve as a preventative measure with regard to suicidal ideation, violence, bullying, etc. Preventative measures should include promoting help-seeking, emotional well-being, and networks of social support and connectedness among children and their parents and teachers,” Gallagher said. Kids who feel connected to others are less prone to feel isolated or exhibit negative behaviors, Gallagher said. Encourage kids to join after-school clubs and practice relationship-building activities. Mindfulness and stress-reduction workshops can also encourage individuals to take control in managing their mental health, enhance resilience and improve life skills, Gallagher said. “We know that suicide can affect everyone, so the good news is that there is room for all of us to get involved with suicide prevention,” Gallagher said.

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Why aren’t parents using allergy pens? By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

or a child with severe allergies, symptoms like breathing problems can quickly become life-threatening. Having an EpiPen handy and being prepared to use it can slow down or stop an allergic reaction.

So it’s troubling that a new study finds half of kids who needed epinephrine didn’t receive it before a trip to the emergency room. “Epinephrine is the first and only recommended life-saving medication for anaphylaxis,” said Dr. Melissa Robinson, an allergy and immunology fellow at National Jewish Health in Denver, Colorado, and lead author of the study, published in July in the Annals of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology.

The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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A quick and progressive allergic reaction, anaphylactic shock it can be fatal, Robinson said. “If an allergic person comes into contact with that allergen — typically foods, insect stings or medications — the immune system overreacts and can release a surge of chemicals that can cause rapid, life-threatening symptoms of anaphylaxis. These symptoms include difficulty breathing due to tightening and swelling of the airway and lungs; wheezing; swelling of the throat, lips and eyes; hives; vomiting and diarrhea,” Robinson said.

Another reason parents hesitate may be cost. The price of Epipens has skyrocketed in the past few years, with a two-pack priced at $600 or more earlier this year, according to Consumer Reports. That’s about six times the cost in 2009. Prices have since dropped at sites like GoodRx, and Mylan, the manufacturer of Epipens, is offering coupons. An Epipen alternative, the generic Adrenaclick, is now available for as little as $10 for a two-pack at CVS stores, depending on your insurance and rebates. Mylan also makes a generic, and an alternative called Auvi-Q is available from physicians.

Quickly administering epinephrine relieves allergic symptoms, leading to better outcomes and decreasing hospitalizations.

DON’T HESITATE

“Similar to previous studies, our study found that children who were treated with epinephrine before arrival to the emergency department or urgent care were more likely to be discharged home, compared to those who did not,” Robinson said.

“If you suspect your child is having anaphylaxis and are considering epinephrine, I encourage parents to administer the medication rather than waiting or hesitating. It is the only life-saving medication during times of reactions and it can save your child’s life,” Robinson said.

Barriers to use

“The treatment of epinephrine during a life-threatening emergency outweighs the potential side effects, which are oftentimes a rapid heart rate and temporary sting from the needle site — both of which are temporary and resolve quickly,” Robinson said.

The study examined 408 records of children who were treated in the emergency room or urgent care. Fewer than half the children received epinephrine prior to arriving for medical care even though approximately 65 percent had a known history of anaphylaxis, and 47 percent had been prescribed epinephrine. The study found that only two-thirds of those who had an epinephrine prescription had their auto-injector available at the time of their allergic reaction. “It’s vital to keep your epinephrine with you if you suffer from any sort of severe allergy. Anaphylaxis symptoms occur suddenly and can progress quickly,” said allergist David Stukus, spokesman for the American College of Allergy, Asthma and Immunology and co-author of the study. Children who had an allergic reaction at home were less likely to receive epinephrine than kids who experienced a reaction at school. “Treatment with epinephrine is often delayed or avoided by parents and caregivers. And sometimes antihistamines are used even though they are not an appropriate treatment,” Robinson said. The study didn’t look at why parents and caregivers failed to use an EpiPen, but from personal clinical experience, “the lack of administration is due to multiple reasons: failure to recognize symptoms of anaphylaxis, not having one’s epinephrine pen available during the reaction, fear of using the injector device as it does contain a needle, treating with antihistamines rather than epinephrine, lack of access to specialty care and potentially medication,” Robinson said.

BE READY “If you have food allergies, epinephrine should always go with you wherever you go,” Robinson said. “Always have a second dose with you and, when in doubt, administer it too,” Stukus said. Become familiar with how to use an EpiPen. Practice with the trainers in your allergist’s office, and have a Food or Anaphylaxis Action Plan in place.

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The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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Kids, cash & snacks: Teaching children about money, healthy choices By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

f all the skills parents teach children, being a smart consumer is often overlooked.

“We teach kids how to tie their shoes, how to cross the street safely. We pay less attention to teaching them how to buy things safely,” said Sean B. Cash, associate professor, Friedman School of Nutrition Science and Policy at Tufts University. Parents should think of kids as young as 8 as consumers-in-training, said Cash, who is co-leader of a new study that examines how branding and pricing influence children’s decisions about snack purchases.

findings. First, kids who have experience with handling money paid more attention to prices. Some children who have financial literacy are able to make better choices, and higher prices for unhealthy snacks might motivate healthier choices, Cash said. “This speaks to the importance of educating kids to be good consumers and having kids get some experience with money, possibly through allowance,” Cash said. The second big takeaway was that brand awareness was not a key factor in purchasing snacks, “which is great news for parents who are worried their kids find certain brand irresistible,” Cash said. It’s not enough for kids to just know of a brand to influence their purchasing choice, Cash said. They had to like the brand.

“A big part of what we (as parents) miss is what they do with their own money. Children have billions of dollars in spending power and most of the spending is on energy-dense foods or junk food,” said Cash, an economist who focuses on how food, nutrition and environmental factors influence producers and consumers.

Price and brand were less important than if a child preferred a certain snack. If a child wants the cookie, they will buy the cookie regardless of how much the yogurt or apple costs or what brand it is, Cash said.

In the study researchers presented a limited series of snack options to the children — cookies, apple slices and squeezable yogurt. Each child, age 8 to 12, was presented 10 times with pairs of photographs of two snack items that differed by product type, price and brand. Each time children could select one of the two products or decide to make no choice.

How can parents get kids to make smarter, healthier snack purchases?

The child was told that at the end of the experiment, one choice would be drawn at random from the 10 decisions the child made, and the child would be obligated to purchase the chosen snack. To make the choice more realistic, the child had to pay for the snack with real money, which ranged between 30 and 70 cents, and they received the designated snack. The money was earned by the children earlier in the study. One group of snacks was from McDonald’s in order to test the importance of branding on children’s choices.

Kids learn by doing.

A goal of the study, published in the journal Appetite, was to find out what motivates kids to make healthier food choices. There were two main

Create teaching moments

“The single most important thing is to talk to kids about how and what they spend their money on. Ask they how they make their decisions,” Cash said.

“They get better (at being consumers) as they have more experience. Educate them to be good consumers,” Cash said.

Manufacturers are marketing to kids “Parents should pretend it doesn’t exist. You’re not doing them any favors,” he said. Instead, help them navigate the environment. “Talk to them about what they see on commercials, what they do with their own money and how they make their choices,” Cash said.

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The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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Healthy eating behaviors to model for kids By Melissa Erickson, GateHouse Media

“special” food but eat whatever the rest of the family eats, Glockner said.

NO CLEAN-PLATE CLUB

“Role modeling plays a significant role in developing both good and bad eating habits for kids,” said registered dietician Jennifer Glockner, creator of “Teddy Tries a Veggie,” a nutrition e-book for kids. “A child definitely picks up on parents’ attitudes about food. Kids learn by observation. If parents sit down to breakfast, kids will adapt that behavior. If parents are excited about eating broccoli, kids are more apt to try broccoli. If parents reach for the cookie jar instead of grabbing an apple, kids will mimic.”

BROADEN TASTE BUDS

To raise healthful eaters, Glockner offers the following tips:

Since many kids like pasta, use whole grain pasta or ones made from spiralized veggies including squash and beets, she said.

arents are role models for their children, who imitate their actions from smiling to the way they speak and even their gestures.

The same goes for eating. If parents model good eating habits, their children are more likely to be healthful eaters.

TAKE MEALS TOGETHER Family meals are really important for several reasons. They facilitate bonding and connectedness in a family. They also provide an opportunity to model healthy eating habits. For example, family meals are a great time to eliminate distractions such as phones and TV, which lead to mindless eating. “In addition, several studies have shown that more frequent family meals decrease the risk of childhood obesity,” Glockner said. Remember that family meals don’t have to be elaborate or at dinner time. “They can be a simple breakfast or breakfast for dinner,” she said.

SET GROUND RULES Mealtime shouldn’t be a battle, but parents should rely on some rules. “Select rules that actually improve eating habits rather than ones that foster unhealthy habits,” Glockner said. Parents need to provide food and it should be up to the kids to decide what and how much to eat from the choices given. Kids should not have

“Cleaning the plate is not a good rule and doesn’t lead to healthy eating behavior. Kids need to learn to listen to hunger cues and satiety signals. Kids should stop eating when they feel full. Being forced to clean the plate beyond that point may lead to overeating,” Glockner said.

“If kids only like limited foods such as chicken nuggets and pizza, start with small changes to make these foods healthier. For example, try baking the nuggets instead of frying them. Make the pizza healthier by trying whole grain crusts (or ones made from beans or veggies like cauliflower). Add lots of veggies to the pizza,” Glockner said.

TREAT THEM An occasional dessert as part of a healthy eating pattern is OK, but try to reserve cakes and cookies to special occasions and holidays. “Eliminating dessert completely may backfire,” Glockner said.

SOME TIPS: l

Just a small portion may satisfy a child’s craving.

Try baking healthier versions of favorite desserts at home. For example, substitute half of the butter or oil in a recipe with unsweetened apple sauce or avocado.

Encourage kids to eat fresh, seasonal fruit routinely as dessert. It can be prepared in fun ways like fresh fruit ice pops, smoothies, yogurt parfaits, fruit kebabs and fruit cookies made with sliced fruit and nut or seed butter in between.

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The Record | Sunday, August 26, 2018

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Is your child prepared to stay home alone? By Lauren B. Schiffman, GateHouse Media

how appealing the color, is NOT candy and should not be taken without adult supervision.

hen I was a kid, the term used to reference those of us who returned home after school without a parent present was “latchkey kids.” Back then, after-school programs weren’t as plentiful as they are now, and some parents had no choice but to let their kids come home sans supervision.

If major appliances are off-limits, like the stove or a microwave oven, be sure to tell your kids and make sure they understand the importance of kitchen safety.

But that was then. Today, there are a lot more factors to consider when deciding whether or not to allow your child to be home without a parent, babysitter, grandparent or someone else to supervise. Be sure that your children know how to get in touch with you if there’s an emergency. A tip: post to the fridge or near a telephone any phone numbers your child may need. These include your phone number, the number of a trusted neighbor, the police department, the fire department, and of course, 911. It’s also important to put your home address on this paper even if your kids already know it. In the event of an emergency, they might forget under pressure. In order to prepare effectively for an emergency exit, run through drills with your children on how to egress the house safely and quickly if necessary. Be sure to establish a common meeting spot - a neighbor’s house, for example - so everyone can be accounted for. Advise your children to not open the door of your house under any circumstances. Be sure that they understand that just because someone says they are a delivery person, for instance, that doesn’t mean it’s true. Advise your kids to tell the person at the door that “Mom or Dad can’t come to the door right now.” They should never tell anyone that they are home without adult supervision. Teach your child basic first aid in case he or a sibling gets hurt while home alone. Your children should understand that medicine, no matter

If you have any firearms in your home, they should be locked away and not loaded. Children should NEVER be given access to any storage unit that holds firearms. Consider what the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign’s Child Care Resource Service (CCRS) says about whether your child is ready to be home alone: Does your child want to stay home alone? Does your child exhibit the right signs of “responsibility and being aware of the needs of others”? CCRS also asks parents to consider whether a child has the wherewithal to make good choices and can communicate openly about interests and concerns. Parent-child communication is needed to ensure that any fears or problems that arise because of staying alone can be quickly discussed and dealt with. If you believe your child is ready, test his or her readiness during the weeks leading up to the start of school. Leave her home for short periods of time with a gradual increase to a few hours -- the length of an afternoon. Finally, before you consider leaving your child alone at your home, even for a very short amount of time, be sure that you have reviewed all of the safety measures and emergency protocols. Let a trusted neighbor or friend know that your child is home without supervision and perhaps, most importantly, be sure your child is ready to take on the new responsibility.

Stockton

SEPT 29

2018

L A IV T S E F Y IL M A F &

Celebrity Guest

DAVE KINDIG

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Star of Velocity Chan

Bitchinʼ Rides and owner of Kindig-it Design

Sat., Sept. 29th • SJ County Fairgrounds Buy your tickets online or pre-register your classic car entry at:

StocktonAutoShow.com

Exhibitor & sponsorship opportunities available @ 209.546.8210 or 546-8218