The Regular Joe - March 2016

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Oldies But Goodies

Jay Kerner Publisher/Rocktegenarian

It’s recently come to my attention that I have officially crossed over to full-fledged geezer status. (I’m sure my certificate is in the mail.) AARP probably sold their mailing list. The idea sort of came home to roost when I saw a promo for the 2016 Grammy Awards on TV, and realized they hadn’t mentioned one single artist in the long list of nominees and presenters, that I would switch over from a Seinfeld re-run to see. Most I’d simply never heard of, and even if I have inadvertently caught a tiny sampling of their musical stylings here or there, it was most likely while using the search function on the car radio, and was accompanied with either a grimace or outright mocking, depending on whether there was anyone in there with me. And then, of the nominees I’m at least aware of, there are precious few I’d grab from the dollar CD pile at a garage sale. And I get it. I finally understand how some of our grandparents could hate Elvis. And how some of our parents’ generation hated the Beatles. Both always mystified me. Like, how could anybody not get it? But I think I’m starting to put it together. It’s kind of like everybody has a hard drive in your head where you store your stuff. And while it’s pretty big and holds a lot, there must be some maximum capacity and you fill it over your lifetime. Your music folder starts with “Rockabye-baby” and “I love you a bushel and a peck” and builds from there. Pretty soon you’re adding TV theme songs and kid movie soundtracks. You progress through a period of “greasy, grimy, gopher-guts” until somewhere in your teens, when you enter a phase where you quite literally, “Can’t get enough of that funky stuff.” I should add, “whatever that funk may be” because most of us will grab onto whatever is prevalent during those formative years in your life, wherever that happens to fall on the musical landscape. For some of our older readers, their hard-drives are filled with bigband stuff. It was the current thing during that window for them, and they drank full and deep from the trough. Then, when the Elvises and the Chuck Berry’s came along, they subconsciously knew they didn’t have room for a whole new category and simply shut it down as a safety measure. But their kids naturally, “Rocked around the Clock” and “Rolled over with Beethoven” until they, too, woke up one day and found out the music of their lives had become “That Old-Time Rock and Roll”. And of course, then turned up their noses when the metal got heavy. My own personal hard-drive pretty much starts with the Beatles and runs through say, Pink Floyd. And it’s absolutely full. I’m serious. If I try and add anything to my mental music folder these days, a little box opens up asking what I want to delete to make space. (Which does happen once in a while. Just last year for instance, I added some Florence and the Machine and cut loose some … hmmm. I can’t remember for sure, but it might have been some disco era Bee Gees.)

2 That’s why there’s just no room for rap, hip-hop or a lot of modern music. Sorry, but No way! My brain just won’t make room for it. But that’s ok! I accept that maybe it’s just the natural order of things. I figure we all get to create our own top 40’s countdown, but no matter what trips our musical triggers, sooner or later it gets moved over to the oldies station. As for the Jaybird, I’m clinging to my music and make no apologies for what I like. But, I also fully defend your right to cling to your own! (Even if it’s stupid, worthless crap!) All I ask is, could you please at least turn it down a little? It’s after 7pm. People are tryin’ to sleep!

The Regular Joe

phone 816-617-5850 read us online at www.theregularjoepaper.com email us at email@theregularjoepaper.com snail mail us at The Regular Joe


Dear Joe,

Unplugged is a live acoustic music venue, and neighborhood bar. Monday - Thursday is open mic, as soon as the doors open at 3:30pm. The PA will be on when we open. We will be featuring bands on Friday and Saturday nights, by the end of March. Closed on Sundays, for now. In due time, we will be developing a genre specific open mic schedule starting at 9pm, Monday - Thursday. For example... blues night, country night, folk night, punk night, etc.. Unplugged does not mean no amplification. It simply means no electric guitars, or distortion. Basically, you can play whatever you want, as long as you do it on a dreadnought. The house will have a 6 string acoustic electric, an acoustic electric bass, tambourine, and a djembe available. Musicians are welcome to bring their own instruments, including drums. Drums will not be mic’ed, the instruments will be DI’ed, and we have 2 SM58 microphones for vocals. Our system will grow in time, to handle larger arrangements. We’d like to invite all musicians, and fans of live acoustic music, to join us in developing the 3rd generation of a long standing tradition, at 2605 Frederick Avenue, St. Joseph, MO

Dear Joe,

The Buchanan County Social Welfare Board (SWB) was established in 1913. It is the oldest free clinic in the United States. The clinic’s mission is to care for the medical and dental needs of our community. These are our neighbors and our friends. They are the people who in better times filled our potholes and restored our electricity following storms. They are the underemployed and the unemployed. Because the SWB receives state support, it is not allowed to solicit monies from grants. The ‘Friends of the Free Clinic’ was established for this purpose. Being incorporated as a Foundation allows Friends to compete for grants requiring a nonprofit status. It allows fundraising projects. Please join us to celebrate with a day of giving: 6th Annual St. Joseph’s Day Celebration Tuesday, March 22, 2016 5:30 to 8:00 pm Pony Express Museum 914 Penn Street, St. Joseph $40.00 per person RSVP by March 18 to Christi Norris 816344-5205 or fofc@socialwelfareboard.org It’s Italian! It’s a Mustache Bash! Enjoy an Italian dinner, fun entertainment surprises, and raffle ticket prizes! Put on your ‘stache and let’s celebrate together. The reality is that we are all but one serious illness away from bankruptcy. Imagine the impact we can have on our community.

Dear Joe,

Spring is here and it’s time for fun at Toddler Storytime at the St. Joseph Public Library, Carnegie Branch during our upcoming Spring Storytime session. Not only do we offer wonderful stories, rhymes, finger plays, crafts and songs, we ready toddlers for the road to reading. Storytime is offered Wednesday mornings at 10:30 a.m., beginning March 2, 2016. Children 18 months and up accompanied by an adult are welcome. Registration is appreciated but not required. Please call 2380526 to register or ask a question. The Carnegie library is located at 316 Massachusetts Street. To better serve our patrons, the St. Joseph Public Library will offer storytime at one of our four branches each day, Monday through Thursday, into April. For more information about all our St. Joseph Public storytimes, please access our website at sjpl.lib.mo.us


St. Joseph Live Music Highlights The Lucky Tiger 718 Francis

First Saturday with live music all afternoon. See flyer pg. 12

First Ward St. Joe Ave & Grand Live Music most week ends.

Eagles Lodge N. Belt Hwy. Live Country Music Most Saturday Nights

Paradox Theater, 107 S. 6th

Mon Mar 21 St Joseph Big Band Jam! 7-10p



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“If It Looks Like a Man—Gender Identity, Female Soldiers, and ‘Lady Bushwhackers’ in the Civil War” During the American Civil War, hundreds of women cut their hair, bound their breasts, donned men’s clothing, and reported for duty to Union or Confederate army recruiters. Others served as scouts, spies, or rode with their husbands and brothers in contested areas. All of this occurred at a time when there was a great emphasis on women’s and men’s separate “spheres.” This presentation explores how and why a fascinating group of women defied cultural norms to participate in America’s largest domestic military conflict. Diane Eickhoff is a former textbook editor turned historian, Chatauquan, and humanities scholar. She is the author of Revolutionary Heart: The Life of Clarina Nichols and the Pioneering Crusade for Women’s Rights and coauthor of The Big Divide: A Travel Guide to Historic and Civil War Sites in the Missouri-Kansas Border Region.

ST. JOSEPH MUSEUM 3406 Frederick Avenue St. Joseph, Missouri, 64506 6 p.m. ADMISSION IS FREE!


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Mug Shots

See anyone you know? Tell ‘em you saw their mugs in The Regular Joe!



The Return of “Johnny Hotpants” by Johnny Cathcart One of the reasons I made my prolonged journey to the great urban jungle was to market my book, the one I had published several years ago. After years of being walked over by a barrage of literary giants and Gucci-loafered agents, I decided it was time to step up my game. After almost a year of re-refining, re-editing by six different people, and a healthy sprinkle of faith and pixie dust, a new version of HOTPANTS hit the New York streets. It’s much more greased and ready to stand out amongst the sea of talent here, and one day make it into the hands of a Mirimax Films executive… or the like. So here I am, back in the heart of the country, my roots, and my family. I believe that a good reason I’m here in this life, is to share this suggestively titled story with as many people in the world as possible. The story in this book… it’s just too deep and meaningful to me to give up on after a few years. It’s redone, much better, and it’s already made a difference in people’s lives here in New York and actually in Houston. There’s much more to go, but the next on the list is here in my hometown. THURSDAY, MARCH 31 from 6:00 - 8:00, at THE TIGER’S DEN downtown, the wonderful little bookstore bar, I’ll be reading a couple excerpts from the book, selling / signing copies, and of course enjoying the craft beer and clean air.


When Grade B is Better Than Grade A If your child brings home a report card with all B’s instead of A’s, you’ll still be satisfied with their perfornance, as long as you know they are studying up to their potential. B is good but an A is best, right? Not when it comes to maple syrup, though. This is one case when a B grade is better than an A because Grade A maple syrup has a higher sugar content (65 percent sucrose) while Grade B contains larger amounts of trace minerals such as chromium which actually helps stabilize blood sugar. Pure maple syrup is one nature’s special treats, long revered and used by Native Americans. They would often mix it with deer meat. Today we know it mostly as a condiment for pancakes, but it is increasingly being used as a sweetener for natural treats. One company, Hail Merry, uses maple syrup exclusively in their macaroons and tarts. You haven’t lived until you’ve tried one of their chocolate miracle tarts. Just a half of one of these little gems is enough to satisfy any sweet tooth or chocolate craving you might have. But maple syrup, particularly Grade B, is used for more than sweet treats. Grade B Maple Syrup is one of the key ingredients of the Master Cleanser, which combines maple syrup with lemon juice ,cayenne pepper and pure water. The Master Cleanser is often used as a post-holiday detox and weight loss aid. It is a rather rigorous regimen of ingesting nothing but the Master Cleanser for a period of ten days or more, but it is said to provide all the necessary nutrients the body needs during the fasting period. If you would like more information about the Master Cleanser, just come into the store and we will be glad to provide you with the recipe and

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instructions on how to use it. Or, if you’re not ready for the Master Cleanser but simply want to use maple syrup as an alternative sweetener, we have a nice supply of Grade B Maple Syrup from Wisconsin in quart-sized glass containers. Ask for Herrmann’s Pure Wisconsin Maple Syrup. Mention this article and you will receive a 20 percent discount off the retail price. And by the way, Mr. Herrmann himself still delivers his syrup personally to A-Z all the way from Wisconsin as he did to the former owner, Mary Prince. This is a true example of orchard to table! We also stock Hail Merry’s chocolate tarts, which would make a great Valentine’s treat to share with your sweetheart! Yours for more B’s than A’s, James Fly Certified Health Coach (Institute for Integrative Nutrition)


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From the Shelf:

Laughing Dogs “s/t” By Danny R. Phillips

Sadly, the 1970’s are littered with bands that should have made it but just missed the mark of stardom. Badfinger, Big Star and Brooklyn, New York’s Laughing Dogs are my top three crying shame bands from a decade that passed on greatness and gave groups like Taste of Honey, Lipps Inc. and KC and the Sunshine Band immortality on the AM dial. While I have written about Big Star and Badfinger before, Laughing Dogs has escaped my pen for only the fact that I didn’t know they existed until I found them in my girlfriend’s meager selection of vinyl. As with her first response to the record was the cover, feeding my curiosity and drive. A thug looking kid with a dog on his stoop matched the music held within the jacket; Laughing Dogs comes on like KISS meets barroom punk, rough around the edges but still embracing the ballad heavy trend of the late 1970’s. “I Need a Million” is the perfect blend of punk’s aggression, the melody and harmony of Cheap Trick power pop and the blown out, give it all you got, working man’s ethic of Springsteen. My first contact with “I Need a Million” was through Kansas City punk rock band Red Kate and the smoking cover version on “When The Troubles Come.” The opening track of the Laughing Dogs “Get ‘I’m Outta Town” skates dangerously close to the bloated, tired BS of bands like Steely Dan and Boston, though there is something lying between the notes that makes them different, a power and urgency that the aforementioned bands only wish they could achieve. A quick search of Google will pull a video shot in 2008 for the DVD “Live at the Village Underground,” that shows a band, thirty years on, that only seems to have gotten stronger over time. The Laughing Dogs have sharpened the edge that was like a razor in their youth. Comparing the performance on the DVD and the young turks blasting from the grooves in the wax is interesting. Time has not worn The Laughing Dogs down. No, time has made them more of a cohesive unit. A mutated rock n’ roll machine, fueled on fun and a need to explode, to give anyone listening at the show or dancing on a borrowed rug in the comfort of home, an experience that will stay with them far past the drive home from the bar or after the record goes back in its sleeve for safe keeping. The band’s debut (whose cover art was originally slated for Wicked Lester, an early version of KISS, but was shelved at the last minute) has many of the influences you would expect to hear from a band rolling out of the mid to late 1970’s. Elvis Costello and the Attractions, Joe Jackson, The Kinks, The Count Five, The Clash, any power pop group or New Wave outfit blasting noise out of the New York punk Mecca CBGB is here. Sure, some of The Laughing Dogs material can seem dated or mundane to today’s world of Kanye West obsessed zombies, however it still rocks on a level few from the era could do or sustain, even in their youth. The debut, with great drumming by Moe Potts, blistering guitar via an E Series Gibson in the capable hands of one Mr. James Leonard, steady bass bottom end by singer Ronny Carle and rhythm guitar licks and keyboards by Carter Cathhcart, is packed full of songs that should have made it, everyone a flamethrower gut punch. The standouts “I Need A Million,” Get Outa My Way,” “Low Life” and “I’m Awake” all speak to the more emotional, aggressive side of self that should have tapped into the public vein or, at the very least, would be popular enough to warrant another record but sadly, no. There would be no second record. Therefore, for now I drop the needle on my girlfriend’s copy, playing songs over and over, wearing grooves and wanting more.



Woods & Bruce Electric “No job too small!” David Bruce, Master Electrician 816-617-1152

Tax Services of Northwest Missouri Inc. Cary G. Alburn, EA •Professional Services, Reasonable Fees. •Tax Return Preparation.•Representation before the IRS. •Tax Accounting and Consulting. •Individual, Business/Farm, Trust (816) 901-9575 3110 Karnes Road, Suite 101 nwmotax@earthlink.net Saint Joseph, MO 64506

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Northwest Missouri Section


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From the Desk of Joe Northwest Mindi L. Phillips, Regular Joe NW Editor

March is National Nutrition Month. We all have a basic idea of what good nutrition is. As a health coach, as well as a patient who has undergone a mandatory prescribed diet for a recent medical condition, I am fully aware that knowing is a far cry from doing. I recently took on the brave task of teaching a group of elementary children some basics of healthy living. The honesty and directness of their responses to each week’s lesson is quite refreshing, and it has also been quite surprising. I’m nearly shocked, pleasantly of course, to learn how many of them do eat a cut above the “Standard American Diet.” But I’m disappointed to learn that the children who appear the healthiest are the ones who seem to be most confused about what foods are considered healthy. Tricky advertising has a big hand in this. A comforting fact is that the healthiest of my students seem to be the most physically active. Of course, activity levels can fall as we reach adulthood. We all know that both nutrition and activity are contributing factors to good health. Some of us tend to lean toward one or the other. And that’s where some of us tend to fail. The best method for obtaining truly good healthy is to combine several factors, including lifestyle changes, physical activity, positive attitude, and good nutrition. We may have the best of intentions, but we often slide off a month or two after our most recent New Year’s resolution. Some of us join weight loss programs or join a gym. Some succeed short term, and some plateau or yo-yo. Some of us throw in the towel, give up, and forget till next January. The most successful of those who seek good health are those who get support. A coach, a family member, a group. Someone with whom they check in, stay accountable, contact when they feel they are backsliding or just cannot stick to the plan. Their goals slip away without that support system. For me, my accountability has been to my 8-year-old son, who needs to know how to eat, how to stay active, how to maintain the attitude and lifestyle necessary to live a long, happy, healthy life. If you are struggling to do this for yourself, switch your focus and decide to do it for your loved ones. And if you don’t have current support, make it a priority to find a friend or coach today! Wishing you all good cheer and good health!

Mindi Cover photo by Jennifer Farmer


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Our “Regular” Contributors: Mindi L. Phillips, NW editor Rich Piper, editorial Mike Rockett Jr., editorial Thomas J. Williams, movies Contact Mindi at Regular Joe Northwest 816-596-0701 northwest@regularjoepaper.com

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Live Music Across NWMO

New And Ongoing Live Music Events

Photo by Nicole Nodland

BETHANY Fri 3/4: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall) Fri 3/11: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall) Fri 3/18: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall) Fri 3/25: Country Style Band, 7pm (VFW Hall) CLARKSDALE Fridays: Clarksdale Opry, 7pm (Hawman Center) FILLMORE Fridays: Music & Dance, 7pm (Community Hall) GENTRY Fri 3/11, Ramblin Country Music Show & Dance with Russell Foster, 7:30pm (Lions Club) PHOTO Fri 3/25 Ramblin Country Music Show & Dance, 7:30pm (Lions Club) GRANT CITY Wednesdays: Jam Session, 6pm (Senior Center) KING CITY Sat 3/19: Rock N Country Variety Show, 7pm (TriCo Visitors Center) MARYVILLE Sundays: Northwest Opry Country, 2pm (Nodaway Co Senior Center) Sundays: Forney & Paxson, 7pm (Eagles Lodge Bearcat Aerie#3669) Sat 3/5: Echosmith with Well Reds, 8pm (Ron Houston Center) PHOTO OREGON Thursdays: Country Music Dance, 7pm (TJ Hall Comm Bldg) SAVANNAH Saturdays: Savannah Country Jamboree, 6:30pm (Senior Center)

BE SURE TO CALL AHEAD IF THE WEATHER LOOKS BAD. SOME VENUES WILL CANCEL FOR ICE OR SNOW. TRAVEL SAFELY!


An Ode to Crosley the Cat Mike Rockett, Jr. Middle Aged Hustle: Adventures in Motivation

Crosley had been described by those that loved him as “a run of the mill orange tabby,” but somehow I think they were being modest. Cats are notorious for many things, and sleeping excessively in direct sunlight is probably at the top of the list. In that respect he was typical. It was in this manner, a few years ago, that the remarkable feline passed into eternity. He fell asleep in a sunbeam and didn’t wake up. There are two types of people in the world: those that love cats and those that don’t. I mean, dogs are cool (loyal and affectionate,) but cats RULE! In order to more thoroughly offend the dog folks that may be reading this, here are five reasons why cats rule and dogs drool (as reported by buzzfeed.com). 1. Cats are the most popular pet in the US; there are 88 million pet cats and only 74 million dogs. 2. Cats sleep 70 percent of their lives. 3. Owning a cat can reduce the risk of stroke by a third (but what if you owned three cats?). 4. Cats make 100 different sounds, whereas dogs only make about 10. 5. A cat’s cerebral cortex has 300 million neurons compared to a dog’s 160 million. In all fairness there are many ways a dog is superior to a cat, but in my personal experience I cherish cats more than dogs (although there is a purebred Pug named Izzy who would melt anyone’s heart). I digress. I had only known Crosley for a few days, but what he impressed upon me was life changing. He was a walking education - well sort of. He was barely out of kitten hood when I met him, although he was rather sizable

for his condition. You see he had a very poor sense of balance, he couldn’t walk a straight line, and he was unable to stand for more than a few seconds before flopping on his rear end. To see him cross the living room floor was farcical. Those in the know guessed that Crosley had an inner ear infection as a small kitten and it damaged his sense of balance. But the official cause was never determined. Nevertheless this wasn’t what made him exceptional. Cats are often perceived as snooty because you can’t summon them with a whistle like their canine counterparts. I understand this to be independence. You have to give cats the room they need to get to know you and trust you. That means you have to put the cat first in any social exchange. I have found that respecting the cat’s wishes is the inroad to his fuzzy little heart. Doing this creates trust and loyalty, and in a matter of time he will approach you for that affection both of you really crave. Crosley was the exception to that rule. Crosley was one of three cats that lived in his domain, and as I entered two of them arrived to investigate the ruckus but, true to form, kept their distance. I laughed as the clumsy hunk of fur made his way over to me almost uninvited. I fell in love with the little guy immediately.

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He could barely step an inch or two before he fell over. Lesson 1: Cat was unafraid to make a new friend. There were at least two other cats in the room at the same time, and of the three the one with every reason to avoid me made the only attempt at greeting me. Lesson 2: He didn’t let his physical setbacks stop him. He was enthusiastic in his reception of my affection (which I lavished on this incredible little cat). Every time he flopped over he hopped right back up. Lesson 3: He was incredibly upbeat even through his circumstances. My time with him was brief but educational. As time moved on I never forgot the feline with a big heart. I discovered a few days ago that Crosley had passed in his sleep. He was only about 3 or 4 but entered eternity doing what came naturally: ensconced in the warmth of sunlight. If only most humans should be so lucky. I can’t say that all of this makes him better than dogs but he is still pretty incredible to me. Mike Rockett Jr. is a photographer who resides in Northwest Missouri. He has a passion for fitness and bodybuilding. He seeks to share his motivational journey with others.

Open Mon-Sat 3pm-1:30am

21 & over only - We card at the door NO credit cards - We don’t take plastic! Pool Table & Shuffleboard

136 Highway, Albany, MO


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Events & Festivals across NWMO

MARYVILLE Tue 3/8: Women’s Equality Activist Lilly Ledbetter, 7:30pm (Charles Johnson Theater) 3/7-3/25: Kyle John ceramics exhibit, 2-5pm Tuesdays (DeLuce Art Gallery) Tue 4/5: “What Matters?” documentary about extreme poverty, 7pm (Charles Johnson Theater) 4/7-4/9: “Legally Blonde: The Musical”, 7:30pm (Ron Houston Center) ROCK PORT Sun 3/6: Atchison County Fair Board Fish & Chicken Fry, 11am (Velma Houts Building) ONGOING EVENTS ALBANY: 2nd Wed: Book Club, 10am (Carnegie Library) BETHANY: Wed & Sat: Dungeons & Dragons, 5pm (Gamers Palace) GRANT CITY: 2nd Friday: Potluck, Noon (Senior Center) KING CITY: 3rd Wednesday: Potluck Dinner (Senior Center) Last Monday: Pitch Tournament (Senior Center) Daily: Cards (Senior Center)

Mission Possible Thrift Store & Food Pantry

East side of the square in Grant City

660-564-4014

Lord’s Warehouse

donations needed: coats & food items E of Albany on Hwy 136

660-726-4297

MARYVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY EVENTS FOR FEBRUARY Adult Reading Program Through March 5th! People have asked what the requirements are for this program and the answer is - there are none! Just read adult or YA books (ebooks, print books, books on CD) from MPL and be 18+ with a valid MPL card. Every book you read earns a ticket for our prize drawing. Sign up at the library or under our Facebook events tab. Ask at the front desk for your prize drawing tickets.


Thrive, Not Just Survive Rich Piper

In life, whether it be as individuals, families, groups, organizations, businesses, or communities, our focus can be so intense to just get through “today,” to just survive the moment, the challenge, the crisis, the task, “breathing,” that we can so focus on surviving that we never move on to thriving. While not exclusive to the small, or the rural, it can almost seem to be more natural to just focus on survival. After all, the small, is by its nature more dependent on fewer components, be they people, ideas, cash, or other resources. When you have fewer, that fewer become more vital, when they are more vital, they can play a bigger role in not surviving – thus they become, willingly or unwillingly, reasonably or unreasonably, a rationale for focusing on survival. There are just too many things that can go wrong with the too few resources at the disposal of the small, or the rural. Now, allow me to be clear that I think there is nothing wrong with survival. Keeping, keeping on can be kept. But it can also keep one from expanding into other opportunities that might otherwise be available. Further, sometimes keeping doesn’t result in it being kept. In most, if not all aspects of life, it just isn’t possible to maintain the status quo, thus working on keeping usually means that one not only loses opportunity, but also generally means that one loses part of what one was trying to keep. And this is generally the case if we are talking about individuals, families, organizations, and even communities. Risk, and the concern for what might happen, often is at the heart, (more correctly the mind’s thinking), of the desire to survive instead of acting to thrive. Yet success in many aspects of life naturally involves risk. Again, whether we are individuals, families, parents, children, organizations, or communities – risk is a natural part of life. Risk seems more potentially devastating when you have fewer options, dependent on fewer people and other resources – in other words when you are small, and/or rural – the presence of risk seems heightened and can lead to a struggle for surviving, rather than to turn towards thriving. For many small, rural communities survival is the status of last resort. We just want to hang on. We just want to keep what is left. We just don’t want to lose any more…, you fill in the blank. Unfortunately, whether it is a small community, a small school, a small business, a small church, or other presence in rural life, survival is not keeping, it is just a path of decline that is unfortunately not recognized – or acted upon in such a positive manner to reverse course. Risk adverse is the fancy term for describing the choice of not taking a risk. We simply don’t want to risk making a mistake. Yet, here are a couple notes on reality. One, if we don’t take risks we are going to make mistakes.

NW - 23 Two, if we do take risks we are going to make mistakes. Three, we are likely to make the same number of mistakes whether we take risks or whether we do not take risks. Thus, we are not avoiding mistakes by not taking risks. We are only avoiding acquiring an opportunity that might lead us to thrive, instead of survive. And that is the case whether we are talking about individuals, families, schools, businesses, churches, civic organizations, etc., etc. If we are going to maintain those wonderful attributes and benefits that come with being small, and with being rural, we, you and I, must move from surviving to thriving. And that means taking risks. Most folks that live in the land of The Regular Joe of Northwest MO do so by choice, and do so because they cherish the positives of small and the positives of rural. (For those of you who do not, and are negative about small, rural life and negative about small institutions, let me borrow a phrase that’s used just a bit south of us, “Bless your heart.” Then please allow me to inform you that most public libraries have big city newspapers available in which you can look for job openings and housing. If you do not have access to a library, I will be glad to personally provide you with a recent copy of a big city newspaper.) That said, if you and I like what we have with the small and rural in this part of the world, survival is not going to work – it, at best, will only slow the pace of decline. That is simply a risk I do not wish to see us take. Because survival, literally, is not a real choice! Rather we, as individuals, groups, schools, churches, law enforcement agencies, civic and social groups, etc., must seek for small, rural to thrive. We must THRIVE, not just survive. Rich has spent most of his adult life living and/or working in small, rural communities in Wisconsin, Iowa, and Missouri, including several long stretches in Northwest Missouri. Rich chooses to spend most of his weekday, daytime hours teaching students science, and other things, in Union Star. He also chooses to spend his Sundays, and some other occasional time, with the good folks in Cainsville. You can reach Rich at RichPiper@LifePraise.org with comments.


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The Jinx

NW Movies- 25 Thomas J. Williams The Jinx: The Life and Deaths of Robert Durst 2015 ****(4 stars)

This six-part documentary miniseries (airing on HBO) is nothing short of riveting. Piecing together the mysteriously odd (later) life of millionaire NYC eccentric Robert Durst, director Andrew Jarecki has given viewers an in-depth analysis of a sociopathic man linked to three murders -- two mysterious, one insane -who is apparently made out of teflon as absoultely nothing will stick to this man which allows him to walk free amongst us all merely because he is very rich and could afford wonderful legal teams. In the early 1980s, Durst’s lovely (first) wife went missing one night when she was allegedly returning to NYC from their Westchester home, and her body has never been found. Waiting four days to report the missing person in NYC threw the investigation off from the very start as doormen and others apparently spoke with Mrs. Durst after her arrival in the city (they didn’t -- he just said they did). [This story was made into a mediocre film -- All Good Things starring Ryan Gosling and Kirsten Dunst -- a few years ago by Jarecki.] Fast-forward a few years and a mysterious murder is linked to Durst after the cold-case involving his wife is reopened. And even a few years later, Durst kills his neighbor in Galveston, Texas and chops him up into bits and throws him into the bay. This is all public knowledge and has been heavily reported in the press; but Mr. Teflon Durst has amazingly steered clear of any criminal charges on all three murders. He literally cut his neighbor up into bits. And walked free. Truth. Apparently upset with his portrayal in the media, a delusional and narcissistic Durst contacted Jarecki to get “the truth” out, which has resulted in this overly revealing documentary series/film. Oops. It is fascinating to watch play out with interviews of major key players in the cases, Durst himself and his second wife along with news

clippings and video from the past and re-enactments of some key moments in the stories. Even with mounting piles of evidence, nothing ever seems to link Durst to any crime (except for the dismemberment, which ISN’T A CRIME IN TEXAS and therefore you could be eating in the same restaurant as this man tonight). Yes: mind-blowing! Some reveals late in episode 5 will be jaw-dropping. Well made and structured, Jarecki has a true true-crime story that is too strange to be believed, although nothing is made up. Will VANITY finally be what brings Mr. Durst to justice? Thomas Williams is a native of Northwest Missouri. He studied English lit at Truman State University. One of his favorite quotes is from Winston Churchill:“I am easily satisfied with the very best.”


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Rochester Hans Bremer

I remember the June I didn’t die. I remember the silt and runoff, the quick plummet of the upper falls. My friend Scotty and I were diving for treasure, running our nimble fingers over the jagged stones in hope of sifting river shells from the muck. Weights and snapped line were tossed to Scotty’s dad fishing off the lower cataract. He was sitting in a lawn chair plopped down in the swirl. Livers and worms, corn and stink bait, he cast whatever caught. Every now and then, he’d tug a beer from a scratched red cooler, pop a top, and swill. I thought him brown as a chestnut, some king electrician harnessing that serpentine current. I doubt I was far off. That year was one of three Scotty’s dad coached our little league. Scotty ruled first base. We, both, pitched. Most of the time, I caught. Between halves of a long season, we were lodging in Scotty’s lime green pup tent. Black cherry Shasta cans governed the picnic table: a weekend’s campaign. But it was late on Saturday when the shrill sirens of the sheriff severed the croak of tree frogs a few yards from the fire. It seems there were other families, lines and bobbers, styrofoam boxes of icy cans of Goetz. Back down at the falls, there were lanterns and searchlights, the guttural hum of a trolling motor. More deputies came, a game warden, an empty ambulance. I remember the mosquitoes were thick and the rescue hooks dripping. We never saw a body. I never heard a name, but death came in a catfish hole and they found the man bobbing

NW - 27 We left early that morning, were spared the coroner’s truck, the black bag and mourners. North of town, we stopped for gas. Scotty’s dad bought doughnuts. It wasn’t enough to save that green year.

downstream the next day.

TRIVIA: Which Echosmith single was featured in the film Endless Love? Like our “Regular Joe Northwest Edition” Facebook page and be the first to post the correct answer to win a large pizza from Benelli’s!


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Echosmith, The Well Reds to perform SAC spring concert

MARYVILLE, Mo. – Echosmith – the sibling quartet behind the smash hits “Cool Kids” and “Bright” – will headline the 2016 spring concert sponsored by Northwest Missouri State University’s Student Activities Council. The Well Reds will perform as the opening act for the concert, which is slated for 8 p.m. Saturday, March 5, at the Ron Houston Center for the Performing Arts. Doors open at 7 p.m. Student tickets are $10 and available at the Student Services Center on the first floor of the Administration Building, beginning at 8 a.m. Jan. 28. Remaining tickets will be available to the general public for $25, starting at 8 a.m. Feb. 4, at the Student Services Center, by calling 660.562.1212 or online by clicking here. Tickets sold on the day of the show will be $15 for students and $30 for the public. In a SAC survey last fall, students named Echosmith as one of the top artists they wanted to see perform at Northwest. “Being an up-and-coming band, we thought Echosmith would bring an energetic atmosphere to Northwest,” Ali Stott, SAC’s concert director, said. “The Well Reds also have performed with many well-known artists, such as Andy Grammer and Hot Chelle Rae, and I am excited to see what they have in store for the show.” The Sierota siblings — Sydney (vocals/keyboard), Jamie (vocals/ guitar), Noah (vocals/bass) and Graham (drums) — comprise Echosmith, which Jimmy Fallon dubbed “one of the biggest breakout acts of 2015.” The Southern California-born quartet grew up in a musical household, and shared a love for playing instruments and listening to bands as varied as Coldplay, The Smiths, U2, Joy Division and Fleetwood Mac. Those influences yielded the melody-minded, New Wave sound of their debut album, Talking Dreams. In 2014, Echosmith was named an MTV “Artist to Watch” and a VH1 “You Oughta Know” artist. The band has been featured by the likes of Rolling Stone, USA Today, Billboard, TeenVogue and ELLE, which dubbed “Cool Kids” as “an ageless anthem.”

They have performed all over national TV, from “Ellen” and “The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon” to “Live! With Kelly and Michael” and “Late Night with Seth Meyers.” Winning over new converts with their sparkling songs and dynamic live shows, Echosmith also has toured with Owl City, Young The Giant and American Authors, in addition to two Warped Tour runs and a special appearance with Taylor Swift on her “1989” tour stop in Philadelphia to perform “Cool Kids.” The Well Reds have notched their place in the Atlanta rock scene with an alternative take on pop-rock that mixes clean live guitar tones and piano with indelible vocal melodies and acute lyric sensibility. The Well Reds have enjoyed national exposure as winners of the New Music Seminar Live at Roxy Competition and as finalists in season one of “The Ourstage Panel.” Their latest album, Volume, was recorded with Grammy Award-winning producer Joseph Prielozny. The quartet also has performed throughout the country, sharing bills with bands like Hot Chelle Rae, Daughtry and Andy Grammer. With a versatile set built on powerful originals, current covers and feel-good hits that just about everyone will know, the band prides itself on its ability to connect with a wide variety of audiences and is road tested with more than 100 college shows under their belt. The Student Activities Council is comprised of Northwest students charged with planning and administering activities for students, who pay an activities fee as part of their tuition costs. In addition to lectures and late night activities, SAC annually plans fall and spring concerts that feature acclaimed performers selected from a rotation of genres to appeal to students’ varied tastes. For more information about the concert at Northwest, contact the Student Activities Council at sac@nwmissouri.edu or call 660.562.1226. ########## For more information about NWMSU events, visit www.nwmissouri. edumedia/

Regular Joe is looking for your stories of Northwest Missouri past - your childhood memories, old traditions, favorite corner store...Photographs are also welcome. Email us at northwest@regularjoepaper.com



Building Your Kung Fu By Shannon Bond

Memory is not singular or static. It is not a video recording stored away in our biological hard drives made up of the tissue in our brains. It is actually a set of processes that that are constantly churning away. These processes are changing the makeup of our brains as we experience the world around us. In reality, our memories are flawed. Our recollections may feel accurate but we know from research that there are assumptions and blanks filled in by our minds. This has to do with the way we observe the world and process the phenomena that we take in. We are wired to attend to singular events, often times to the exclusion of the surrounding environment. As we grow and change in our fitness focused lives this can be a benefit, because the type of memory that is most important to us is procedural. This is otherwise known as muscle memory and as we explore new ways to stay healthy it is important to understand how it works. Procedural memory is what we develop as we run, ride, walk, or work out in other ways. You may also think of this as your Kung Fu. Every skill we develop is Kung Fu if you think about it. The accountant has Kung Fu as their fingers dance across the calculator, performing a graceful show of 10 key skill. The cook has Kung Fu as they deftly move about the kitchen, adding spices and herbs to a stove top brew. This procedural memory is what develops as you perform a task over and over. That is why it is so important to focus on form when you first start a new routine or activity, such as swimming. The habits you build up in the beginning stay with you whether you want them or not. And, they are hard to correct down the road. If you have ever tried to change your running stride, you understand how hard it can be. But, building this Kung Fu is like tapping into biological magic when you do it well. As a matter of fact, after mastering a skill, if you do think about what you’re doing, you tend to lose your focus and make mistakes. Think about when you type, if you focus on the keys, you’ll slow down, but if you focus on the words in your mind, your fingers sail across the keyboard. When we think about health and wellness, it’s important to remember that the experienced runner did not start by running a 50k. The experienced climber did not easily scale the wall, and the experienced cyclist didn’t buy that first bike and peddle 100 miles. The first step to developing your procedural memory, or Kung Fu, is to take that step. Don’t over think it, just do it, focus on your form, and keep doing it day after day. The challenge in front of you in the beginning, will be the normal routine tomorrow, and by then you will be looking forward to a new challenge. This is true of our fitness levels too. That first 5k may wreck you, but in a few weeks, as you keep running, you get stronger, your lungs get better, and you forget about that initial struggle. We build our Kung Fu through repetition that continuously builds those neural pathways in our brains. So, if you’re stuck in a rut with your current routine, or if you’re new to fitness, the most important thing to do is take that first step, and all the ones after.


Small Gods by Terry Pratchett Reviewed by J. Christe

What happens when a god has lost his believers? On Discworld, they drift out to the desert, where they slowly go mad. The god Om, who happens to be stuck in the shape of a tortoise, is desperate to avoid this. With a massive following in Omnia, filled with priests and bishops, Om can’t figure out why there are no actual believers. It would be easy to manifest into the world to fix this if, he could only escape the tortoise form. Luckily he finds one true believer to help him, Brutha. Little does Om know that Brutha’s simple mind is destined to save him in more ways than he can imagine. (It turns out that gods aren’t terribly imaginative.) Terry Pratchett has crafted a tale full of insight and, as usual, delivers serious subjects gift wrapped in comedic entertainment. Small Gods looks at organized religion through a satirical lens and gives the reader plenty to think about. It brings belief, dogma, humanity, and politics together on his famous Discworld, which could easily be seen on any world. There are throwbacks to the ancient Greeks, the Catholic church and modern politics. The book was published in 1992, but is just as relevant today. Its look at hard line religious zealots and politics is a sometimes eerie comparison to our contemporary world. Pratchett does a nice job with characterization and provides insightful perspective into each character’s life, and death. You can find this book in audio (Scribd and Audible) and ebook format (Overdrive Media Console and the usual online suspects).

Joe Books pg 31



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