The Regular Joe - St. Joseph, Missouri - July 2015

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The Cost of Living Jay Kerner Publisher/Economist

In street vernacular, what it really comes down to is, “ya gosta pay if ya wansta play.” Because everything costs. Everything. Crummy stuff costs more than what you pay for it. Better stuff costs more. Sometimes a lot more. Sometimes free stuff isn’t really free. So assuming that you’re a reasonably healthy specimen, you’re either going to work to pay for the stuff you want, or you’re going to steal it (legally or illegally). From there it’s all a question of what standard of living you’re willing to accept. People can and do survive on almost nothing in our community every day. They’re not living well at all by most folks’ standards, but they’re living to the standards they accept for themselves. But the same thing happens at every socio-economic level. People are working to pay for their “Rock and Roll Lifestyles” whether that means a new McMansion on the eastside, a loft downtown or a trailer down by Lake Contrary. If you’re working and you like what you do, and you combine that with an income that lets you meet your own acceptable standard of living, heck… you’re golden. Unfortunately, most people aren’t that lucky. Mick and Keith couldn’t get no satisfaction and that pretty much goes for the rest of us, too. We’re conditioned to want more and the advertising/marketing/entertainment/media are all slanted to reinforce those notions. So you keep your crappy job to maintain a life style below your acceptable level, and you’re pissed off all the time. Or you up your game to shoot for something better. Now better can mean more fulfilling work or better compensated work and ideally both, but it’s never a good idea to sacrifice the former for the latter. Now let’s apply that concept at the community level. We’ll have a number of financial decisions to make over the next 20 years. (Like every 20 years.) What if we drastically switch from our mindset of spending less and getting less, to one of spending more and getting more? Crazy talk for our tight-fisted town, but hear me out. What if everything we do, we do it awesome? Really awesome. So awesome that we’d flock to it and be proud of it. So awesome that people would come here to see our awesomeness. And each awesome thing we do contributes to the awesome movement and spurs more of the same. At one time, this town was known for awesome! I believe we can be again. Easy for me to toss out, clearly, but where’s the coin for all this awesome you ask? Our grandchildren will pay for it, and I want to let them! In the immortal words of Popeye’s pal Wimpy, “We will gladly pay them Tuesday for a hamburger, today!” We brag and brag about our low cost of living here. Then we gripe and complain about the life we’re getting for our money.

So let’s change it. How about the next municipal project to come up, we go over the top with it? I’m talking outrageously awesome. Then do the same on the next one and the one after that. It will cost more money but so what? Future generations will pay the bills and gladly, for the opportunity to live near all the awesome. The increase in property values more than compensates for the investment in the awesome. What kind of hometown do you want to leave future generations? A cheap place to live because everything’s crummy, or a place where it’s a little pricey but worth it because it’s so AWESOME!? The further out you get from the awesome will become crummier as you go, we reckon, because for some folks crummy will always be good enough. But we think most folks want better than crummy. Maybe some will be inspired to fix up some of their own crummy. Maybe others will feel peer-pressured to. It would probably be a rude adjustment, but I think folks around here could get used to awesome things. Not all at once, mind you. We’d have to build up a tolerance first. Maybe this movement is already happening but we just didn’t know that’s what it was? Look at some of the newer features and amenities in our community. The expanded trail system, the Nature Center, the Aquatic Center, the wonderful new dog park. All are nicer than you would have maybe expected from previous generations of civic leaders. We can choose to do awesome here! Awesome schools. Awesome parks. Awesome streets. Awesome opportunities for awesome lifestyles. A higher cost of living for sure, but a greatly enhanced quality of living. As always, we will have exactly the awesome community we will pay for. Nothing more. Nothing less.


Dear Joe, Dear Joes, Mark your calendars for July 11th!! The Lucky Tiger, Nesting Goods, Skateboard Everything, Healing & Metaphysical Arts, The Griffey School for the Arts, Mod Podge Boutique & Design Studio, The Duffel Bag, Cafe Pony Espresso, Keeping Good Company-St. Joseph, Bliss Salon, & Edmond Street Parlor invite you to our sidewalk sale. Refreshments at many stops, amazing deals from current stock to stores cleaning out their storage. There is really no telling what you might find! We’ll open at 10 am. Hope to see you there!

The Regular Joe

phone 816-617-5850 read us online at www.theregularjoepaper.com email us at email@theregularjoepaper.com snail mail us at The Regular Joe P.O. Box 1304 St. Joseph, Mo. 64502


Under the Big Oak Tree Playing Grand Opening of Downtown Abbey July 12th

Under the Big Oak Tree (www.underthebigoaktree.net), St. Joseph’s own acoustic American-roots music band, will present a special all-ages concert on July 12 to celebrate the Grand Opening of Downtown Abbey, a beautiful new events space. Gary and Joni Westcott renovated and transformed a 1901 brick church building on Felix St. into Downtown Abbey (www.thedowntownabbey.net): a charming setting for concerts, performances, and private. Tickets are available online at on the “Buy Tickets” tab at www.facebook.com/underthebigoaktree or at www.universe.com/UbotAtTheAbbey. Kids are welcome, and those 12 and under get in free. The new venue features superb acoustics and will be an ideal setting to hear the band’s lush, acoustic sound. “We’ve always thought our music would work best in a concert setting, some place comfortable with really good acoustics. Until now, we haven’t had a venue like this in St. Joe,” said Kristin Hamilton, the band’s lead singer. Antique stained glass and woodwork adorn every wall of the former church, and seating is pew-style with padded benches, accommodating an intimate crowd of up to 150.

Stephanie Gummelt (www.facebook.com/ StephanieGraceGummy), who sang her way to Hollywood on the final season of American Idol, will open the event with her unique brand of “pop-folk-rock-angst.” Under the Big Oak Tree will follow with a special kid-friendly performance. “We’re trying to put together a unique set of songs to match the beautiful listening environment of the Abbey. We’re going to make it really fun for kids too!” noted Simon Fink, the band’s main songwriter and fiddle and mandolin player. The concert is on Sunday, July 12th and will begin at 4:00 p.m. and go until around 5:45 p.m. giving audience members enough time to get back to Coleman Hawkins Park for the Imagine Eleven concert series. Downtown Abbey is located at 1202 Felix Street. Tickets are $10 each, and children 12 and under get in free. Tickets will be available at the door, or in advance on the “Buy Tickets” tab at www.facebook.com/underthebigoaktree) or at www.universe. com/UbotAtTheAbbey. Doors open at 3:30 p.m., and refreshments will be available for purchase on site.

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Local Arts Re-Mix At Missouri Theater July 25th Two popular local musicians, a chance to bid on one-of-a-kind art pieces, hor d’oeuvres and drinks, a selfie contest, a night out in historic downtown… it could only be the debut of Saint Joseph Performing Arts Association’s newly minted fundraiser Local Arts Remix. Local artists have been asked to create original art pieces from re-purposed musical instruments which will be displayed at selected businesses around town starting in the first week of June. The Performing Arts Association will be promoting the event by posting the locations of these installments on Facebook and encouraging residents to take “selfies” with the artwork and post them on their social media pages with the hashtag #LocalArtsRemix. On Saturday evening, July 25th from 5:00 pm to 6:30 pm the public will have a chance to bid on these pieces of musical art during a silent auction at the Paradox Theatre located at 107 South 6th Street. Entertainment for the evening will be provided, unplugged, by Chris Clark and Todd Cooper. The event is expected to last from 5:00 pm to 7:00

pm with hors d’oeuvres and drinks available all evening. Tickets will be $5.00 and can be either purchased ahead of time at the Performing Arts Association office located at 719 Edmond St. or at the door. The Saint Joseph Performing Arts

Association is a non-profit organization with the goal of bringing professional touring shows to the Historic Missouri Theatre.


Rewriting On the Fly Jay Kerner Publisher/Doer Overer

Coach Jim Perry taught me to type at Central High School. I jokingly tell him it’s the only thing I learned there, but it’s not that far from the truth. They call it keyboarding now, though I won’t be surprised when they change to the current standard, thumb-typing for smart phones. Back in the day, we learned on actual manual and electric typewriters. A roomful, all going at once is a unique sound in the universe, maybe never to be heard again, but folks of a certain age remember. A cacophony of clickety clacks. The bells and the carriage returns kershwonks. I personally, became a moderately competent typist. I say moderately, because while my speed was a little above middling level, my accuracy was a little below. Corrections were a pain back in the day. Getting everything lined up perfect to use little strips of correction tape. Or else using White-Out fluid to cover your screw-up with a lumpy crust of paint. I had ideas about being a writer back then, but I’d be going along, typing at roughly the same rate I think, but then stumble on the typos. I’ve heard that you’re supposed to just power on through and correct later, but my brain doesn’t work that way. Totally broke my train of thought. Typing also didn’t facilitate my need to rewrite on the fly. I was forced to work longhand on legal pads and spiral notebooks, but my writing was filled with lined-through sections, eraser smudges and arrows rearranging blocks of text. They looked like the ramblings of a madman and perhaps they were. Then came computers. Or more specifically, word processing software. That changed everything. I started by writing business proposals, (back when my business wasn’t so monkey-centric!) Suddenly, my errors were highlighted for my convenience. Spelling, punctuation, whatever. But they didn’t just show me what was wrong, my new friend also showed me an assortment of correct alternatives I could choose with the click of a button. A lot of the time it changed it for me with autocorrect. If you’ve read any of this column over the last 8 years, there’s a good chance every sentence was changed at least a little from the original version. It’s my process. I write a little. I read a little and change it a little. Sometimes I start completely over. Sometimes I start with an idea and the piece sort of writes itself, if I’m smart enough to get out of the way. Sometimes I know it’s in there but it fights me coming out, like a breech baby in the birth canal. Nothing you can do but brew some coffee (and also boil water for some reason.)

No matter how the idea germinates, it travels from my evil brain, through my fingertips to the screen, where I can twist, turn and manipulate the copy till I’m happy with it, or at least till I eventually give up and hit save. The word processor allows me to do all this. It’s a program that recognizes how my brain works and does it’s best to help me. You would think with an all-knowing tool like this, there wouldn’t still be errors in printed material. Ha! First, you should know that sometimes we’re wrong on purpose. We’re like that. Sometimes the wrong word is just funner. (Like that!) (The proper usage of course, is “more funner”.) It’s also a real thing that this computer assistance makes us all a bit blind to what should be obvious errors. No excuses for our past or future faux-pas, but at least we’re in good company, as you know if you read most any publication. You may have caught the recent headline about a baseball pitcher, touting him as “Amphibious” instead of “Ambidextrous”, though either is a good story. At least the computer told everyone involved that it was spelled correctly. Thinking about it now, it occurs to me how different life would be if I could re-write everything on the fly. I could fill a book with stupid things I’ve said in social situations. I’m the worst! The less I know you, the more I’m likely to prattle something instantly regrettable. My history is filled with inappropriate attempts at humor. Lame pickup lines. Questions about impending birth to the non-pregnant. Queries concerning the location of better halves to the newly divorced. That kind of thing. Oh, to have the same ability with my tongue that I have with my keyboard. DELETE! DELETE! DELETE!



Sculpture Walk Winners Announced Friday, June 12, almost 100 people gathered at Bourbon Street for the opening reception for the St. Joseph Sculpture Walk. At the reception Teresa Fankhauser, Allied Arts Council Executive Director, and Robbie Morton, Allied Arts Council Visual Arts Committee member, announced this year’s 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners. First place went to Dale Lewis, with “Cherry Tree,” second place went to Jamie Burnes with “9 Piece Ring,” and third place went to Alan Detrich with “Mirage.” First place winner Dale Lewis, from Hastings, MN says his goal was to make a gnarly cherry tree that looks like it took decades to grow. “The trunk and branches are constructed with stainless steel flatware handles. This technique creates a nice barky texture, but feels like it takes decades to build. Fork tines are wrapped around ruby red marbles for cherries and spoons were used for leaves,” said Lewis. visit “Cherry Tree” is across the street from the Ground Round on 6th street, between Edmond and Francis Street. Second place winner, Jamie Burnes, of Santa Fe, NM, created “9 Piece Ring” which is located near Coleman Hawkins Park on Eighth Street, between Felix Street and Francis Street. “In my work I focus on archetypal creatures, and forms such as spirals and animals, to express the deep spirit of life on earth and our interdependence on it. I am drawn to the tension between what is natural and organic, between man and nature, and between time and decay. I combine the natural elements of earth with the ingenuity of manmade steel, and through this juxtaposition explore how one informs the other, and together they create new understanding, reminding us of our earthbound roots,” said Burnes. Third place winner, Alan Detrich, of Lawrence, KS created “Mirage.” Detrich has discovered many rare dinosaur specimens over the years, with his most important discovery being a nearly complete Tyrannosaurus Rex found on private deeded ground in South Dakota. “Mirage takes the form of a portal, a defined plane that offers the opportunity to visually explore spatial perceptions. The portal opening is almost completely filled by three vertical columns. On one side the view is understood only through the small slits in-between the columns. From the opposite side, the columns are mirrored in such a way to reflect both what is in front of and behind the viewer. The viewer’s reflection is also present, making them a participant in the mirage,” said Detrich.

Want to be involved? Help determine the People’s Choice Award by picking up a Sculpture Walk brochure from various downtown businesses and vote for your favorite. Voting is open from now until January 2016. All of the sculptures are also for sale. You can find purchasing information at www.stjoearts.org. The Sculpture Walk truly blends natural beauty, with our rich cultural heritage and beautiful, historic architecture. The mission of the Sculpture Walk is to be an important, national recognized platform for sculpture while educating and inspiring the St. Joseph community and its many visitors. This project is made possible through the partnership with the City of St. Joseph and funding from the St. Joseph Downtown Community Improvement District, National Endowment for the Arts, and numerous sponsors. For more information about the Sculpture Walk, please call 816-2330231, or visit www.stjoearts.org.


Adult Summer Reading and St. Joe’s Baseball History On Tap in July from St. Joseph Public Library Why let the children and teenagers have all the fun? Escape the Ordinary and join the Adult Summer Reading Program at any St. Joseph Public Library. The program runs through Saturday, July 25. If you are an adult, 18 or older, you may participate to win one of the weekly prizes and a grand prize at the end. It is easy to enter. Look for the Escape the Ordinary display at your library. To enter the drawings, pick up and fill-out the form located at the display. Return the completed form to the entry box. You may enter once for every book you read. Any printed, digital or audio book may be entered. The Adult Summer Reading Program at the St. Joseph Public Library is supported by the Friends of the St. Joseph Public Library. Baseball season is in full swing! Join Bob Slater, lifelong resident of St. Joseph, and Chuck Kempf, Interim Parks & Recreation Director, as they present the history of baseball in St. Joseph. Learn about this local favorite pastime, along with the history and renovations of Phil Welch Stadium. Free admission and light refreshmentsserved. Call 236-2107 for more information.

Woods & Bruce Electric “No job too small!” David Bruce, Master Electrician 816-617-1152


Live Music Hi-Lites Cafe’ Acoustic 2605 Frederick

ALL SHOWS 9:30pm unless noted July 1 OPEN MIC hosted by Zale Bledsoe July 3 FOXLIN & Black the Buffalo July4 SWEEP the LEG @10:30pm July 8 OPEN MIC hosted by Zale Bledsoe July 10 Kansas City Hustle & HUBCAP BANDITS @10pm July 11 Bret Yager’s B-day BASH featuring Burnstyles & the BBQtioners July 15 OPEN MIC hosted by Zale Bledsoe, Feature Artist Kristen Ford July 17 ACIDIC July 22 OPEN MIC hosted by Zale Bledsoe July 24 Attic Light & the Sneaky Creeps & CUPCAKE July 29 OPEN MIC hosted by Zale Bledsoe, Feature Artist SCARLETT’S EMPIRE July 30 Berg, Repaid in Blood & In Death & UTWE July 31 The Curse of Cassandra & Mannequinn Escort @9:30pm

Coleman Hawkins Park 8th & Felix Sounds of Summer Concert Series Friday 7/10 Swift Kik Friday 7/17 Soca Jukebox Friday 7/24 Charlie & the Stingrays Imagine Eleven Concert Series Sunday 7/5 Liverpool Sunday 7/12 Rattle & Hum Sunday 7/19 Blackbird Review Sunday 7/24 Lyin Eyes

Magoon’s Deli 8th & Locust

Thurs 7/2 Jason Riley Fri 7/3 Jon Wayne & The Pain Sunday 7/5 Jerry Forney Monday 7/6 Amalgam Jazz Wed 7/8 The Motors Thurs 7/9 Brody Buster Band Fri 7/10 Whodovoodoo Friday 7/17 The Pickless Fools Sat 7/18 Magoon’s Famous Fish Fry with Steamboat Bandits, Heavy Glow and many more! Fri 7/24 Page II Sat 7/25 Beacons Fri 7/31 Charlie Maples

The Lucky Tiger 718 Francis

First Saturday with live music all afternoon.


AFL-CIO Holds Month Long Christmas in July For the third year, AFL-CIO Community Services is hosting a month-long Christmas in July FUNdraiser, to raise money for the many programs supported by AFL-CIO Community Services. Last year, more than 150 people helped to raise more than $11,000 by participating in events throughout the month of July. Raising funds in this community has its benefits and downfalls, said agency director Penny Adams. “People in this community are very generous with their dollars, but there are many non-profits who are looking for financial support so the competition is fierce.” Through Christmas in July the agency tries to offer something appealing to several different types of interests and age groups. “We try to give them something to do besides just make a donation. Plus the interaction gives us a chance to show them what our agency is about. We want them to know more about the agency they are investing in and who their dollars help.” Events will include Trivia Night, Christmas in July Sale, Raffle & Toy Drive, Mustangs’ Christmas Extravaganza, and Scavenger Hunt & Pub Crawl. All events on this year’s calendar promise to be bigger and better than 2014. “We had to look at new options for locations because we had outgrown the space we used for trivia last year,” Adams added. During the Raffle & Toy Drive, for every $10 toy or cash donation, donors receive a ticket for one of three prizes: $50 or $100 K-Mart gift card or $500 CASH. Raffle tickets will be available from June 29 to July

31 at the agency office, 1203 N 6th St. All other events have giveaways and prizes for the winning teams. The Trivia Night and Scavenger Hunts are great team-building, and friend-time events and the Mustangs game is family-friendly chance to support our agency and St. Joseph’s very own home team! “Santa will be in attendance at the Mustang’s game, and will be offering 6-month good behavior check-ups for children who come to the game,” Adams added. Please attend one of the many Christmas in July events. The funds raised during these events will filter directly back into the programs of AFL-CIO Community Services. None of the donations leave the St. Joseph area and the funds will be used to help your neighbors who are in need. We promise attendees will have FUN! A full list of events and dates can be found below. Trivia Night – July 11 – Come test your knowledge at our holidaythemed trivia contest. Silent auction and mini games too. Green Acres Ballroom, 3500 N. Village Dr. (by Hollywood Theaters). Each player is $20, with a 10 person team maximum. Early bird sign-up $15; deadline June 19. Doors open at 5 p.m., game starts at 7 p.m. Bring your own snacks and drinks, food and drink items will also be available for sale. Mustangs Christmas Extravaganza – July 18 – Join us for the final game of the season and watch Santa Claus throw out the first pitch. Buy your $7 tickets through our agency and $3 will go toward our Christmas in July fund drive. We will also be selling 50/50 tickets at the game. Last year’s 50/50 winner took home more than $1,200. Game starts at 7 p.m., Phil Welch Stadium. Pub Crawl & Scavenger Hunt – July 25 – You may think you know St. Joe, but this list may stump even you. Bring your car, digital camera and up to four friends to join the fun! Registration starts at 5 pm, and the hunt begins at 6 pm at the Letter Carrier’s Hall, 2301 St. Joseph Ave. Each player is $15, with a 5 person team maximum. Early bird sign-up $10; deadline June 25. Christmas in July Sale – July 30 – We save the good stuff for one night of can’t-be-beat bargains in the Community Clothes Closet. For every $25 you spend, you’ll get $5 in Closet Cash for your next visit. The sale is scheduled for 4:30 to 7 p.m., 1203 N. 6th St.


12 Joe Health

Curcumin: Nature’s All-in-one Solution? Well, it just might be, according to numerous clinical studies as reported in other media sources. Turmeric, the yellow spice that makes mustard yellow and forms the basis for Indian curries, is making headlines these days because of the anti-inflammatory properties of its chief phytochemical, curcumin. Rural Indians, who eat turmeric in their curries daily, have long been known to have some of the lowest rates of Alzheimer’s Disease and cancers in the world, and research is strongly suggesting that curcumin may be responsible. Inflammation has been tagged as the “smoking gun” behind almost every chronic disease. so anything that helps quench inflammation is welcome news, indeed. In fact, M.D. Anderson, the prestigious cancer center in Houston, reviewed curcumin research and reported it in the journal Phytotherapy Research last year, finding that the yellow spice regulates inflammation that “plays a major role in most chronic illnesses....” The natural health industry has been aware of curcumin’s benefits for some time. Almost all of the supplement companies feature a turmeric/curcumin product of some type. One of them, EuroPharma’s CuraMed, was recently named top antioxidant supplement by Vitamin Retailer magazine. CuraMed contains BCM95, a patented extract of curcumin and tumeric essential oil that is absorbed 10 times better than straight curcumin. It’s available here locally at A to Z in 375 mg. and 750 mg. softgels and in a new effervescent tablet that dissolves in liquid. As Terry Lemerond, the well-respected founder of EuroPharma says, “I’ve never seen an ingredient with as much capacity for improving health and fighting disease as curcumin.” For more information, come on down to the store and we will give you a copy of Terry’s article entitled, “Curcumin: The All In One Solution for Health.” Thank you for your continued support of our independent health food store! Check out the new items on on sale rack such as the Yogurt Greens Bars. YUM!

Yours in good health, Jim Fly, Certified Health Coach





Mug Shots

We caught these Regular Joes at the Pride Festival, Frederick Inn, Norty’s, and the always wacky streets of our city. If you know any of these folks, tell ‘em you saw their mugs in TheRegular Joe!


Murder by Death “Bitter Moon, Bitter Drink” By Danny R. Phillips Regular Joe Music Guy

Murder by Death’s “Bitter Moon, Bitter Drink” comes on like the sound of a Gothic Western; depressing, beautiful and epic. The music surrounds the throaty growl of lead man Adam Turla like a vise. The moving, emotive, expansive and challenging music driven by electric cello, mostly acoustic guitar and banjo is what one only would assume Richard Brautigan’s “A Hawkline Monster” would sound like if it were set to music. “Bitter Moon” is the next in a line of Murder by Death records that seem to give soundtrack to the decline of everything and it seems that the decline is a thing of beauty. “Lost River” has an ominous presence that crawls up your spine and denies you the ability to stop listening. “Ramblin’” is the rush of a mighty wind crashing against a brick wall, pushed by Sarah Balliet’s cello. A true force. “Staring at the Sun” is rock and roll if Jimmie Rodgers had invented rock instead of yodeling. It both smacks you in the face and lulls you to a false sense of security. Adam Turla’s voice is equal parts hope and desperation, a combination of Tom Waits and Nick Cave. It has feeling, grit and wisdom beyond its years as if Johnny Cash had a little brother that was way, way more pissed off then he ever was or could’ve been. Every track on the record is a gem, especially for those out there that love mostly acoustic driven music paired with dark, powerful changes and lyrics as good as anyone around. The standout track is “The Curse of Elkhart.” It’s Death and Destruction making its final march toward mankind while a fellow sits back with a smile and watches it all hit the fan. Murder by Death, Adam Turla in particular, is a truly honest and creative voice in music during a time when acts are cranked out, mass-

produced and shoved down our throats like so many Corollas. Finally, a band that pulls no punches and man, do those punches hurt. Without a shadow of a doubt, Poe, Oscar Wilde and Sam Peckinpaw would be proud.



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