Results Rules OK...
Life Rules OK... …the 8 Rules for Building Your Remarkable Life… Intro Pack…
E Book # 2 David Holland MBA The Results Guy… September 2011
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Contents Acknowledgements How to read Life Rules OK Introduction Rule 1 – Challenge all Your Assumptions Rule 2 - You Always Have a Choice Rule 3 – You Deserve to be Happy Rule 4 – Keep Improving Rule 5 – Build and Apply Knowledge Rule 6 - Be Congruent Rule 7 - Design your future Rule 8 – Break the Rules Sometimes
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Acknowledgements I have read loads of books and always wondered why authors dedicated their books to someone, or thanked people for support and guidance, they were only writing a book after all, and in the words of Jeremy Clarkson “how hard can it be..?” At least this is what I thought just before I wrote Life Rules OK, as soon as I started it I realised how all-encompassing it would become; how it would somehow develop a personality of its own, demanding attention and refinement. I also came to realise that I needed the input, guidance and support of family and great friends along the way. Writing a book is a bit like owning a classic car, every weekend I know I’d like to tinker with it, polish the chrome work or adjust the carburettors (does anyone actually remember carburettors..?), play with the timing and generally mess around with it, all of which is of course completely un necessary. I also know that when completed, or at least 98% completed, I have to take my creation out of the garage and see how she gets on in the “outside world”. So that time has come. I noticed that in the Introduction I recorded that I started writing Results Rules OK at 19.05 on Tuesday 7th December 2010, it is now 06.24 on Wednesday 5th January 2011. It is dark here in Metz, the snow has just about cleared from the garden and there is a frost on the ground. I am sat at my desk with a mug of tea writing these last few additions, and then she will be finished. Even though the actual writing has only taken me a month, and we have had Christmas and New Year in between, it seems a lifetime ago since that first glass of Pinot Noir. So, first I’m going to thank you. Thank you for buying, downloading, borrowing or just acquiring your copy of Life Rules OK. It is written for you, and I genuinely hope that you enjoy reading and learning while you smile and make notes. Most of all it is my hope that you decide to take positive action as a result of your reading and that you attract ever more happiness, in whichever flavour you choose to taste it, into your life. Let me know your thoughts by emailing me at life@resultsrulesok.com or better still come along to one of our events; you will find our schedule listed on our website www.resultsrulesok.com I look forwards to thanking you in person. Lynn, my wife, partner and best friend will be mentioned several times in the book and you will get to know her well as we proceed, when you come to one of our events, you will meet both of us and hopefully everything will make sense. Thank you Lynn, you give me the confidence to fly and shine your light into the dark to show me the way. In October 2011, Lynn and I will have been together for 32 years and married for 25, interestingly the date of our anniversary is 4/10/11 which adds up to 25, the date has added up to our anniversary every year since 2000, before that we had to be a bit creative by adding the numbers and subtracting 100 (don’t start me off…). We have two fabulous boys that have matured into amazing young men and somehow make everything worthwhile, they are like new and improved versions of us and will have amazing ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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and fulfilled lives. They have both travelled the world with us and experienced life in different countries and cultures, they have put up with our entrepreneurial spirits and wanderlust, and yet remained balanced and grounded, they are a credit to us, as we have sought to be for them. So this book is dedicated to Jonathan and Richard our boys’ thank you and I love you. My Dad died in August 2010 on the morning of the day after his 80th Birthday, I never got to say goodbye properly, and I’m not sure I really got to know him properly either. So I want to acknowledge him and all that he gave me, I never said thank you then, so I will say it now, thank you Dad. And to my Mom who, as most Moms do, had three or four jobs and still managed to read bedtime stories and make the world’s best chocolate cake, love and gratitude. She always had high expectations for me and pushed me to go for it. Well I did and I am so thank you Mom and here’s to the next ride on the Harley along the Moselle or road trip across Europe. Finally, thanks to all my friends for encouragement, Mike for honest feedback and proofing, and everyone I have come to know on my journey so far.
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How to read Life Rules OK Life is a journey not a destination… This book is for all of you who want to create a better life for yourselves and those around you. Whether you want to make more money, achieve bigger goals, make a greater contribution or simply understand what makes you and those around you tick, Life Rules OK will help. I have decanted the contents into the Eight Life Rules and together they will give you a structure and an awareness of what you can do, in order to start achieving more. By the end of the book you will be better placed to; 1. Understand how you view the world and what assumptions you are making that empower you and which ones may be holding you back. 2. Choose what it is that actually makes you happy and bring more of it into your life. 3. Be able to plan your future with certainty and take the action you need to achieve the results you choose. Each of the Eight Rules is designed to help you understand yourself better, make better choices and take positive action. So please read the entire book, but take from it the ideas, models and concepts that apply to you directly, you may of course find that they all do, and that is fine, but also remember that your Life Rules will be different than everyone else’s and one size does not fit all. I have put a notes page at the end of each chapter so you can scribble ideas and thoughts as they come to you, if this becomes a mini workbook for you then great. When I have presented seminars and workshops, whilst the actual content is inspiring in its own right (well I would say that wouldn’t I…) it seems to be the stories that bring the concepts to life that touched people the most and enabled them to relate models and concepts to reality. Several times when I started a two hour seminar at 6.30 in the evening, I would be on stage at midnight just engaging with the audience, telling stories, the good, the bad and the ugly, true stories about my life and the lives of others that I have come to know. I have included stories from history to demonstrate and support the rules. I have also included a number of stories from my own life, to show you that this is not just some piece of academic research. I have not mentioned many names so both the innocent and the guilty are protected, and there are some stories that I have saved for workshops and seminars, some that are best told from the stage or better still over a drink in the bar, I look forwards to meeting you.
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Introduction “Be the change you want to see in the world” – Mahatma Gandhi It is now exactly 19.05 on Tuesday 7th December 2010. Working in my office, I have a glass of local Pinot Noir on my desk; if I look to my right I can see through the French Windows that the snow that fell over the last few days has thawed out and the narrow road that leads down the hill towards Metz, and the Autoroute is now passable. If I stand up I can see the 13th Century St Stephens Cathedral in the centre of Metz and in the foreground the Moselle River winds its way north, carrying huge barges full of coal and steel. This region is steeped in history, the Maginot line ran through here, and it seems that everyone has at some time fought battles here. We are 30 minutes from Luxembourg and can be in Germany in 45. On the map, find Paris and look to the right, Reims is half way and then you will find Metz. We are fortunate to have a beautiful home with about a huge garden. I have been married to Lynn, the girl I met at high school, for 24 years, and we have been together for over 30 years. Lynn (the good looking and intelligent one) and I have two fabulous sons, Jon and Rich who are both working in the UK, we even have a pretty dog, Skky, a Siberian Husky that we rescued from a “kill centre” when we were living in Las Vegas, and relocated at “Business Class” rates, to Europe when we moved here at the end of 2009. (How a Siberian Husky got to be in Sin City, in the middle of a desert, I have no idea..) On the drive is my silly sized SUV, again brought with us from the USA. It is a Ford Expedition which in the USA is an average size vehicle with an average size 5.4 litre V8 under the bonnet. In France, however, it is wider than the AutoRoute’s, taller than most car park entrance barriers and drinks petrol faster than the pump can dispense it. So we have a sensible diesel hatchback on the drive with a spare one parked at the back of the garage, and my prize Harley Davidson Night Rod Special is in the garage too. Apparently Drummers are just people, who hang around with musicians, but I always wanted to be a rock drummer; I still do, so everything else I do is simply a day job. I have a huge acoustic Drum Kit in my “play room” along with the Scalextric I never got as a kid and the train set I always promised I would get when I had the space. So far we have had a total of 12 houses, all over the UK from Birmingham to Bristol, Southampton to Horsham and Newport, as well as a place in Las Vegas and two here in France. I have been an Operations Manager, General Manager, Managing Director, Business Owner and a CEO for a the Worlds No1 Business Coaching Company. I have presented, trained, coached and spoken in 20 countries; I have an MBA with distinction, which meant that I actually got to shake hands with the presiding dignitary at the awards ceremony, which made all the effort worthwhile of course. I have more certificates for obscure skills than I can count. I even have certificates for five different types of welding and for designing cardboard boxes. OK – so enough about me, what do you think about me…?
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Pretty good for a kid born in the summer of 1963 in the back end of Birmingham; Handsworth Wood to be precise, the slightly up market end of Handsworth, if you don’t mind. We lived on Craythorne Avenue, with trees lining the road; we backed onto a Golf Course, in a detached (just...) house with gardens and a garage for Dads Vauxhall Viva HA, in a rather fetching chocolate brown. We moved out of Birmingham in 1973 and lived on the edge of Hurley, a small mining village in Warwickshire. In 1979, I left school with the bare minimum of qualifications, the “top stream” in my school consisted of 6 pupils, from memory I was one of the highest achievers with 4 GCSE O’levels, all grade C (it would take a re-sit of English for me to achieve the dizzy heights of 5 GCSE O’levels – and all at grade C.) I will, however, have you know that I have several CSE’s including French and German; but these apparently don’t count… When Dad’s business began to decline (along with my inheritance…!) I was advised that in order to get on in life I should get a “trade” something to “fall back on” when times got tough etc. It turned out that I needed exactly 5 GCSE O’levels at Grade C or above to get a Mechanical Technician Apprenticeship with Royal Ordnance. Apparently I was awarded my place not due to my qualifications, others had more; I got my place due to “sheer determination and strength of character” according to the recruiting officer at. I didn’t even have any experience of metalwork, woodwork or technical drawing; I must have sounded either convincing or desperate at the interviews in London. Getting the Apprenticeship was a huge if somewhat surprising opportunity for me, it would, however, mean that I would be leaving home as there were no locations close to where we lived in Warwickshire. The letter offering me the place on the Apprenticeship didn’t actually arrive; it would take a telephone call from a disgruntled clerk in Whitehall to my Dad to ask why I was late in starting. I had the choice of going one of several Royal Ordnance Factories I chose to go to the Royal Small Arms Factory in Enfield, as it was the closest on the map. There were originally three Royal Ordnance Factories (ROF’s) tracing their history back to 1560 when there was a Royal Gunpowder Factory located in Waltham Abbey, Essex. The second, The Royal Arsenal at Woolwich in London, was used as an Ordnance Storage facility from 1671 – it was the “works football team” founded there in 1886 that would eventually become Arsenal Football Club of today. The third, The Royal Small Arms Factory, was founded in 1816 and was based at Enfield Lock in Middlesex, Enfield was the design, manufacture and test facility for the guns, rifles and cannon (up to 30mm) used by the British Military. So that is how I ended up living in a cold damp bedsit in Ponders End, Enfield, North London at the age of 17. Why do I tell you all this…?
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Because I can remember being sat in that damp bedsit in Ponders End, London, EN3 in the winter of 1980, thinking what the hell had my life got in store for me, and how had I got myself into this situation. Here I was, from a family if business people sat on my own in a strange town attempting to learn something called engineering. I can remember thinking that my “situation” wasn’t part of my plan and that my life should not include this experience, I somehow didn’t deserve this, and that life should give me something better. The room was so cold that ice would form on the inside of the windows, there was no heating, and I slept clothed inside a sleeping bag, on the outside of which my breath would condense and form into ice overnight. Although I had some money coming in from the training program, after the rent I had only around £8 left over each week. I didn’t want to ask for money from my parents because I wanted to prove that I could thrive on my own, asking for help would be admitting defeat. I remember thinking that I could give up the Apprenticeship and go back to the Midlands and get a job in an office or a shop, anything would be easier than this. I didn’t, I decided that I would stick at it and get on with it, and I wasn’t going to let this situation beat me. I didn’t believe in no-win scenarios. Lynn was working in Birmingham as the cost of renting a place in London for both of us was prohibitive, so we decided to have a “long distance” relationship, with me getting home whenever possible. We had been together about 12 months when I left, and we got engaged the week before I started my training. I would spend what loose change I had on phone calls from disgusting public telephone boxes that had been used as urinals and vandalised. A filthy phone booth surrounded by the smell of urine, alcohol and stale cigarettes was no environment to talk to my Fiancé. Damp and cold has a smell of its own, it taints clothes and furnishings making sleeping only slightly more bearable than the shock of waking up. Living on cheese spread and crisps in a freezing cold room began to affect my health so I decided that I had better do something about it. My lodgings were close to the main railway line that runs from London Liverpool Street Station out to Essex and on to Ipswich, Norwich and Cambridge. There were two stations close to me, Ponders End and Brimsdown, so one evening for some reason I decided to get the train to Liverpool Street from Ponders End. Liverpool Street Station is a “terminus” or “terminal” station at the end of the railway line. Trains going into the station have to reverse out as they cannot pass through. The trains were heated so that was already a bonus and I discovered that the last train in to Liverpool Street at night would be the first train out in the morning. I would travel in to London at night; eat at one of the numerous charity shelters that were around, sleep in the station or close to the platform. If I could, I would sleep on the train as the heating was left on overnight so it didn’t freeze up. I found that if I “confessed” to taking drugs (I never did – didn’t have money for food let alone Speed and Amphetamines) I could have free food at one of the shelters on the ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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understanding that I would agree to counselling, I have had counselling for every type of drug, alcohol and solvent based substance that there is. Maybe a separate book in the making…? In the morning, the train would depart Liverpool Street and I would get off the train at Enfield Lock Station, close to the Royal Small Arms Factory, at about 06.00, and go to work as if nothing unusual had happened. This became a regular pattern several times a week. I would leave work, and go to London. I got to know the homeless guys, as well as the prostitutes (not that well…) that worked the Kings Cross area and I became a small irrelevant part of the hidden underbelly that was London 1980. I learned how to avoid confrontation, there is no point arguing with anyone who has just drank, snorted, injected or smoked mind altering substance, you will lose, and even if you win it will make no difference to them because they don’t care, and if you try to fight them off they don’t feel any pain. I learned how to keep warm with news paper and cardboard, triple wall corrugated is the best, trust me. I have had fights over stale cheese sandwiches or a tepid cup of tea. When it rained all it meant was that I had to find a place under cover to sleep where the ground was on a slope so the water ran away from and not towards me. It was funny when some years later while attending a “Management Training” course at Ashridge College. On the first day of the residential week, we were asked to introduce ourselves to other attendees in the training room and tell them something that no one knew about us. There was about 20 people on the course, all very intelligent, bright and enthusiastic, they all had more than 5 GCSE’s O’levels at grade C or above, and CSE’s that don’t count. In front of the room, I was invited to go first, so I said who I was, who I worked for and what my role was, so far so good. When it came to the “what no-one knows about me” part, I told them that I used eat at the Charity food shelters in London, have drug counselling over pie and mash, sleep on trains and station platforms and be on first name terms with the some of the homeless. Stunned silence, this was supposed to be the part where you tell the room that you once met the queen, have a fear of refrigerators, eat Marmite off a spoon or something, they weren’t expecting that. In the bar later, several of the group came up to me and asked more, which was fine by me. It was interesting how many opened up and shared their real “what no one knows about me” stories. We all have a story that defines who we are and what we become, tell your story and never be afraid of what people think about you because of it, those that love you and respect you will do so more when they know the real you. Those that judge you or think less of you are only scared because you are reflecting something in themselves that they feel uncomfortable about, and if they do that, you don’t want to be around them anyway. During that course, which was excellent, we had to play a business game on the college computer network. We were split into four team of five, and each assigned a different “business” to run. Essentially the four teams had to compete with each other by making decisions regarding pricing, investment, employment etc. and enable their business to ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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thrive. The team whose “business” had the best results would win a prize at the end of the week. The instructions were that we should run the business as if we were running one in the real world. Now, as you will see in the “Engineering” chapter of this book as youngster I liked Star Trek, and who didn’t..? In the 1982 film Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, the opening scene actually shows Starfleet Officer Training test in progress. The Kobayashi Maru Simulation test is being taken by Lt Saavik, it is a “no win” scenario that involves the rescuing or abandonment of the crew and passengers of a Class III neutronic fuel carrier called the Kobayashi Maru, captained by Kojiro Vance with 81 crew and 300 passengers on board. (I know; I need to get out more…) Captain James T Kirk, however, had taken the “no win” test three times whilst at Starfleet Academy , on the third attempt he reprogrammed the simulator so that he could rescue the crew and passengers off the Kobayashi Maru and “win” the scenario. He changed the environment to enable him to win the scenario because as he famously says “I don’t believe in the no-win scenario” So, with my team, we changed the environment, and won the prize. Education comes from a variety of sources.. During the time that I spent on trains and platforms I also learned that no one chooses that life, it may choose them, they may tolerate it, but they don’t choose it, I was lucky, I had a job and at weekends I could get back home if I had the Train Fare, the 18.10 from Euston to Birmingham on a Friday evening was my lifeline. The 18.10 was a really crowded train because it was the first train of the evening that Young Persons Railcards were valid for, in other words it was the first cheap train north. I usually got a seat when I travelled on it because no one wants to sit next to the scruffy guy who smells of the cold, damp and soluble cutting oils from the factory, so there was an upside… I realised that for some people this way of living was all they knew, home to some youngsters was a place of fear, a place where adults were to be avoided and whatever happened on the streets was not as bad as had happened when they were at home. I have spent nights talking to and consoling grown men, tough guys, who cried like babies because they had lost their way, lost their children, lost their partners, lost love and any hope of connection. I have also seen humanity shine in the darkness, sometimes people with nothing will share what they gather; splitting a donut with a stranger under an archway and laughing about life can make a Tuesday night seem like Christmas. Not knowing what or when you will eat next is a defining experience, one I have managed to adequately over compensate for in later life. Have you ever considered just how fabulous a Big Mac and Fries with a Coke is to someone who hasn’t eaten for 36 hours..? Even the Gherkin tastes good after that long. If someone looks like they need help, give them food, not money though.
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Where ever I travel now I have a McDonalds, just gives me reassurance that if the worst happens I know where to go to get something to eat; any excuse, and as you will see later, a habit that has now stopped. I have had McDonalds in over 25 Countries now, Sofia, Bulgaria rates up there with the best, although the one just outside of Red Square is pretty good too. A few years ago, I helped out a Charity in Wolverhampton. They were providing warm meals to the people living on the streets, it was probably the only warm food they had each week. I was just helping out and serving the food, chatting to those who wanted to talk and acknowledging those who didn’t. One old man was looked particularly lonely and I asked one of the other helpers if they knew why. Turns out that he had been living rough for a number of years and over time had become friends with another old man who also lived on the streets, however, his friend had died. What had happened was that a group of youths had found him and his friend asleep and decided to attack them. He got away, but his friend did not, he was tied up, doused with lighter fluid and set on fire. This happened in the UK. During all of this craziness, I kept my studies going, getting to work on time every time and keeping up with my college work and reading, and Lynn and I kept our relationship on track somehow.
The Police turned up at the Apprentice Training centre one morning. A huge Constable looked at me through one of the windows, pointed at me directly then with his index finger beckoned me. There had been a murder on Turkey Street in Enfield – apparently a group of skinheads had attacked a family and the father had died as a result. The Police were looking for random “suspects” to participate in an ID parade – and I looked like the skinhead murderer type; nice to know. I attended the parade – there were a number of them and there were some soldiers from Chelsea Barracks there along with me and a few others – must have looked like a scene from “RocknRolla” When it came to my turn we all lined up against a wall and had to put a sticking plaster on our right earlobes as the real suspect had worn an earring – the family members came in one by one to attempt to make identification. One did, she picked me.. So now it was official – I looked like a murderer. Not surprised that the guy on the train was nervous.
After about 6 months, I began to realize that whilst my belief may have been that this was not what fate had in store for me, it would be down to me to get things sorted and get my life back where I knew it should be. If I am honest, this life had a certain novelty factor for me for the first few weeks, after a month this wore off and after a few months I realised that if I didn’t do something it would engulf me. If I didn’t, I knew that I would slide further down and become dependent on the life that I had grown to hate. The realisation that I needed to make changes meant that I became open to the opportunity for change. I can remember the event that I believe helped me change my life. Travelling into London on the train one evening, I sat opposite to a very smart “young executive” as my Mom would call him. In his nice new M&S Suit, white shirt and Windsor knotted tie, shiny black shoes with a copy of the Times newspaper resting on his leather briefcase, he reminded me of a song by The Jam (Smithers Jones, track two, side two from their Setting Sons Album). Anyway, I don’t know why, but he asked me where I was going, ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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now remember, I was an apprentice engineer working in a factory without anywhere to get a shower, sleeping rough and eating only hot food whilst having drug counselling, so I must have stank to high heaven of soluble cutting oil, stale sweat and cheap deodorant amongst other things. I guessed that he had probably read somewhere that if you feel threatened on a train, making polite conversation with your potential assailant reduced the likelihood of attack, he was under no threat from me; he wasn’t carrying any food. Remember, even the Police thought I looked like a thug. So I told him that I was meeting some friends for dinner chatting about drugs and that we would probably be meeting with some hookers later. All of which was of course true, however, the image he chose to create was probably not the one I would be actually experiencing. Then I jumped him and stole his wallet and credit cards, not really, but I did wonder if I had a responsibility to live up to the unfortunate expectations that I suspected he held about me. In reciprocation, and to put him at his ease I duly asked him where he was going. I sensed the tension in the air, it was something that I didn’t like, he was nervous around me, and I felt self-conscious and uncomfortable about it. He told me that he was being relocated by his company from Leeds to another office of theirs in London, and he was going out for dinner with his boss and his wife that evening. He offered me his business card, but he didn’t invite me for dinner, I had not seen one of these before and I was immediately impressed. This young guy, he turned out to be 29, was apparently so good at his job, and so important to his company that they would actually pay for him to move house and work for them at a new location. He was so important that he actually had to have a piece of card with his details printed on it so that people could send him information or call him on his own telephone. I asked him why they chose him, what had he done to be valued so highly. This must have sounded impudent at best, but I was looking for a way out of the life I was living at that time, I was on the hunt for ideas, when my focus changed so did my lines of enquiry. He told me that he had been at his company for 4 years and he simply turned up every day 30 minutes early, stayed 30 minutes late, worked any overtime that was going, got a business qualification at college and beat his targets. Basically he worked hard and delivered results. So that’s how it was David Watts is a song done; work hard, get qualified and then deliver results A written by Ray Davies and appeared on the Kinks simple formula for success, and one that I thought I could 1967 Album – Something and should follow. Else. It was covered by The Jam as a single in That was a defining moment for me, I have had several August 1978 and it since and I’m sure I have more to come, I decided that I appeared on their All Mod wanted to be him, he was my David Watts (you may be Cons album of the same asking the same question that Paul Weller did - who the year. @&$# is David Watts) and meeting him enabled me to change my life. I don’t remember his name and I lost the card he gave me, but I decided there and then that I too ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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would have a business card, with letters after my name, as well as in front of it, and be so important effective and good at what I did, that I would be paid to move house by an employer. I had an objective, and it was exciting, I had no idea how I would achieve it, but I didn’t care. I had been shown what was possible and I was determined to find a way to make it happen. I realised that it was down to me, it was my life and no one else was going to do it for me so it was time for me to stop hoping that that things would get better and start making them get better. This guy in his suit with his business card and company funded move became one of my first definitions of success. Working for someone who wasn’t family was totally new for me, I had been used to the family business where roles and titles meant nothing, it was simply getting the job done and making a profit that counted, I hadn’t realised until then that in addition to a wage it was possible to get promotions, titles, awards, position and status. I basically did what he told me and things started to happen, an important lesson here, and one that I hadn’t figured out before, was that it is OK to learn from others. Everything does not have to be developed from first principles, it’s OK to copy. If someone else is being successful then look at what they are doing and do the same. Better still, ask them how they did it, they will tell you. Market Research is allowed. It also made me realise that no one had prepared me for the world of employment; Dad had prepared me for business and work, but not employment. This was a new game with different rules. From what I have seen, this gap is still apparent within the education system today. I even sound like my Dad now… The next week at work, volunteers were being sought for a special project. Now as anyone even remotely associated with the Military will tell you, rule No1 is that you don’t under any circumstances volunteer for anything, ever. So I volunteered (Take a look at the 2008 Movie “Yes Man”, starring Jim Carey; extreme example, but the principle is right).
I volunteered again in 1983 and found myself actually painting the grass green and the kerbstones white around the grounds of the factory ready for a visit by Michael Heseltine who was Defence Secretary at the time. That’ll teach me…
It turned out that a part of the machine shop had to be laid out differently so that we could begin manufacture a new weapon system for the British Army. I was to be Project Co-ordinator and this meant that I would have to work late every day and be working directly with the Production Director and other senior members of the Management Team as well as external contractors. As no one else volunteered, I got the job; another important lesson here. I started on the Tuesday, by Thursday my new boss realised that my levels of hygiene were not best suited to an office environment, I think the girls in the typing pool had complained, and he asked me if I was OK. No one had ever asked me this, so I told him how I was living and that my wages covered my rent and nothing else, so whilst I could get home to Warwickshire some weekends, during the week I was basically scavenging around. He was ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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ex-military and didn’t stand for any messing about, he told me that while I was at Royal Ordnance he was my Dad, anything I needed I go to him, end of chat…!! With that he took me to the “payroll” department, and it turns out that there had been two errors on my wages; 1. London Weighting had not been applied – this was an additional payment that I was apparently entitled to that compensated me for the extra costs associated with living in London as opposed other Royal Ordnance establishments. 2. I had been paying “emergency” tax; my tax coding had not been processed correctly so I was paying more tax every week than I should have been. Great, good start, thanks Dad.. This was sorted out immediately; I got about £750 cash in a Tax refund, and an increase of about £40 in my weekly take home wage. It turns out that all of this could have been sorted on day 1 not day 200, and that I could have got home more often and eaten better all along. That night I checked into a hotel in Kings Cross, had a shower and ate in a Restaurant, where I didn’t have to show my arms to prove I was not injecting anything before they would give me metal cutlery, which was refreshing. I walked around the places I knew there would be people settling down for the night or turning tricks in alleys and the back seats of cars, somehow, it wasn’t my world anymore, I had escaped. Even now, when I go to any big city I will always go to the “dodgy end” and check it out, not for any patronising reasons, just to remind myself of what it is that I am running away from all the time and that I have an obligation to remember and respect that time in London; and also remember that I can do something to help those that maybe can’t help themselves. I was extremely fortunate, and I count my blessings. The somewhat unfortunate pattern that I adopted during those formative years was that I became extremely “away from” motivated; more on this later in the book. I remember that I cried myself to sleep in that hotel. It wasn’t exactly 5 Star, but it was luxurious and spectacular compared to the bedsit; I even had to pay in cash. I cried out of an overwhelming feeling of relief, not for my present situation, but that I knew that the future could be better and that I had given myself the opportunity of realising it. I also cried because I felt guilt about being OK and knowing that outside, someone somewhere, was having a fight over a cheese sandwich in a side street, or drinking cold tea with a stale donut. All that had changed was me, I had decided that enough was enough and that I was not prepared to tolerate that lifestyle anymore, I had also decided that I was worth more and deserved a better life than that. I had changed my attitude, I had a goal and I was going for it. I had no idea how volunteering to become the Project Coordinator would take me any closer to David Watts; in life the way the dots join up is seldom clear, but join up they do. I turned up for work the next morning 1 hour early, clean shaven, and so motivated I was buzzing all day. I had even put on Brut 33 to make a lasting impression, which no doubt, I did..! ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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I left the cold bedsit that week and rented a room in a “shared facility” house in Waltham Abbey, it was like paradise. The rooms were clean, heated and dry. There were hot showers and for £1 per night I could get a cooked meal. Life was looking up. The other guests, as we were called, in the house were a mixture, there was another Royal Ordnance Apprentice there from Manchester, a guy who had been thrown out of the Army for stealing a Tank in Berlin and taking his mates to the pub in it, and one chap who didn’t speak at all so I never knew what he did.
In the Film Evan Almighty – God, in the form of Morgan Freeman asks the distraught wife of Evan (who God has commanded to build an Ark) if she is OK. He tells her that what she prayed for was for her family to be closer together – and what she got was the OPPORTUNITY for her family to become closer. In life the challenge may not be visualising what we want – the real challenge is stepping up to the OPPORTUNITY that will present itself as a result..
People came and went, it was like a staging post, a temporary holding pen that wasn’t a destination for any of us, and it certainly wasn’t like being at home, but it was a huge step up... One of the other guests was setting up a new business just outside of Waltham Abbey. It was a business that would be involved with growing and selling seedlings to garden centres, he would take the seeds and grow them to small plants that would then be sent all over the UK. He was from Birmingham and I knew the grocery business, so we had some common ground. Over dinner one night he was complaining that he couldn’t get enough people to work a twilight shift, and he asked if I would help him out, so I volunteered again. From 7.00 pm to 12.00 pm Monday to Thursday, I worked for him pressing individual seeds into peat filled, preformed pockets, on moulded polystyrene trays. I got paid 10 pence per tray and could do about 15 trays per hour, so that was about £7.50 a night and £30 a week cash that I was making, with London Weighting and the lower taxes I was about £70.00 up each week. The work was mind numbingly tedious and my index finger was permanently dyed red from repeated contact with the coating that was applied to the seeds before we pressed them into the peat. One evening, as part of a team of about 12, I was working opposite to a middle aged woman who apparently worked there full time, and was working some overtime. After an hour of silence she looked at me and asked me what I did for a day job, so I told her that I was a trainee engineer involved with manufacture and development of weapon systems for the military. She thought about my response and after a pause of a couple of minutes simply said “bet that’s boring…” and nothing else was said for the next 3 hours. I had to smile; I knew that I was on a journey, whilst she was at her destination. After about 6 months of living at the shared facility house in Waltham Abbey, someone who started as a friend and became like a brother to me; Iain Rose, invited me to stay with him
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and his parents during the week. Life became really good and he became my best man at our wedding, he is still my best man today, thanks Iain So my working week would start at 07.30 am at Royal Ordnance and finish at 12.00 pm at the Nursery Monday to Friday, around 80 hrs per week. I was attending college one day per week and earning myself a reputation as a grafter with the Production Director. I won the 2nd Year Apprentice of the Year Award and was nominated for best International Technician Apprentice within NATO, I didn’t get this one, I was too short to look good on the photographs apparently, so a tall American got it, and I am sure he deserved it too. Having extra money meant that I could definitely get home every weekend, the sprint from Enfield Lock Station to Euston to catch the 18.10 to Birmingham from Euston on a Friday was a ritual that became a pattern every week for over 5 years while I completed my training and got qualified. In early 1986 I managed to find a job in Birmingham that meant that Lynn and I could get married and “settle down” – well we did half of this, we did get married in October 1986, but I don’t think we will ever settle down. In hindsight, my training at Royal Ordnance was fantastic and world class. I was involved with engineering and design at the very highest level, working to the highest standards and having massive expectations of excellence placed upon me. I thrived in that environment and it gave me not only a trade backed up with qualifications, but a work ethic and code that would sustain me and see me through. This turnaround all started with me simply following a couple of Life Rules. I had met my David Watts and decided to be like him and I took action to allow it to happen. I volunteered for that new project and I volunteered to help out at the nursery. When I met that “young executive” on the train, I could have chosen to dismiss him, ignore him and walk away, but I didn’t. We have choices. Our glasses can be half empty and draining out, or half full and filling up. We can choose to dismiss or deride those that have more than we have, or we can choose to change our attitudes and realise that anything is within our reach providing we follow a few simple Life Rules. Our attitude will define our actions and our attitude is driven by our beliefs and values. Though I didn’t know it at the time, I simply made a choice and decided that life could and should be better, and that I had to be better too; if I wanted to be successful, I had to do the things successful people do. I learned that anything is possible and the only person who can actually talk me out of being successful is me, I can of course talk myself into being very successful too, it is just a matter of choice. I don’t believe in no-win scenario’s… When I changed my attitude, I changed my behaviour and I started to attract other people to me that had a similar attitude. The more positive and ambitious I became the more opportunities opened up. Our environment and our achievements are a mirror; it reflects to us exactly the image we portray. If you want to change your situation, your results, or your ©Results Rules OK Ltd 2011
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environment, the change starts with you, it’s your attitude that dictates your actions that determines your results. “Be the change you want to see in the world” – Mahatma Gandhi Now here is another key lesson that I have learned, sometimes we don’t know or need to know exactly how our decisions and actions take us closer to our objectives. I had no idea the chain of events that would occur as a result of me taking on that project in the factory working with the Production Director. There is a Law of Precession which states that our results may come to us at right angles to our focus or activity, like dropping a pebble into a pond, the ripples in the pond extend at right angles to the direction the pebble travels. It turned out that the factory layout that I was involved with developing, would be used to manufacture weapons that would be used by our forces during the Falklands War, which started on the 2nd April 1982, and became as such my work became critical little cog in a very large wheel that contributed in some small way to the effort made by so many people during that time. So as you make your choices and decisions, don’t worry about the fact that the dots don’t seem to join up in a straight line, just know that they do join up and hindsight and history will show you where you have been and how you arrived at where you are. I can remember that when the Falklands conflict was over, we received the weapons that had been captured from the Argentine forces for decommissioning. What I was struck by were two things. The first was that there were pictures of Mary and Jesus attached to the stocks of several of the rifles, with rosary beads wound around the trigger mechanism on a few as well – the young Argentinians had taken God with them onto the battlefield for protection. The second was that they were the same L1A1 SLR 7.62mm weapons that our guys had been issued with, and had likely been manufactured in the very factory I was working in. I hadn’t been expecting that. I clearly had a lot to learn about international politics and the arms trade. I completed my training in the summer of 1985 and was offered a position in the Production Design Office, designing jigs, tools, fixtures and gauges. I had my own drawing board, chair and even qualified for my own waste paper basket. I got a white coat to wear as opposed to the green ones apprentices were issued with or the blue ones that shop floor workers got. I even got to eat in the staff canteen rather than the works canteen; I didn’t however get any business cards. When in 1986 a company in Dudley, just west of Birmingham, on the “other side” of the M5 Motorway in the Black Country, was looking for a designer with specific experience of the weapon system I had been working on, they were tendering for the spares packaging and logistics supply contract with the Ministry of Defence, guess who fitted the bill. They recruited me, I got to move back to the Midlands marry Lynn (if they award medals for patience and support, then she would have several by now), as it was explained to me, marriage is a campaign not a relationship.
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In seven years with them I worked at seven locations and as a family we were relocated twice, and I got my own business cards. It was a great organisation with great people and I am grateful for the opportunities and development they enabled me to have. David Watts had entered the building.
For help with designing your Sales process, buy David’s book, Your Business Rules OK by clicking HERE, download tools and templates from our website, come along to one of our events, or email David at davidholland@resultsrulesok.com About Results Rules OK
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To enable everyone to enjoy learning, achieving, doing and being more... This is achieved through the delivery of World Class Business Coaching, Training, and Development Programs designed for business owners and entrepreneurs just like you… We recognise that all businesses are different, as are the people that build, own and run them so we have a range of products and programs that will help, inspire and support you – whatever stage of development your business is at… You can register for our newsletter, check out David’s latest blog and even download documents and templates from our website at www.resultsrulesok.com If you’d like to come along to an event – either to join one of our Webinars or participate in a Workshop or Seminar – click on the LINK to find our full schedule of events. David is offers a limited number of FREE Business Strategy Sessions for qualifying businesses, to arrange a meeting or discussion with David, simply got to our Home Page, scroll down and press the “Book Free Session with David” button... Our USP is our people, our delivery, the results our Clients achieve and our philosophy of Fun in Life and in Business. We are a growing profitable business, and we believe in making contributions to charity and causes that are aligned with our values. David’s unique experience, background and passion for adding value to the business and personal lives of others have enabled him to become not only a top Business Coach, but an accomplished Speaker and Author. Having worked in 21 countries so far, his presentations and key note presentations are compelling, informative and fun and his books reflect his knowledge and personality…
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