Vol. 13 (March 22, 2018) by University News

Vol. XCVII No. 12

A student voice of Saint Louis University since 1921

March 22, 2018

2 March 22, 2018

News

INSIDE SCOOP:

ARTS Love, Simon Review Page 6

March for Our Lives demands for change By SAVANAH SEYER Staff Writer

SPORTS Softball Outfielder Sadie Wise Page 16

OPINION Bipartisanship Page 20

This weekend, the first March for Our Lives will be happening in St. Louis and in various cities across the nation. The March for Our Lives is a march that has been organized in response to the frequent mass school shootings in the U.S. and was organized specifically in response to one of the most recent school shootings at Stoneman Douglas school in Parkland, Florida. The United States is unfortunately no stranger to gun violence. For decades, citizens have been witness to mass shootings and tragedies, many of these happening in our schools. In fact, they happen so often that it seemed that most people had become quite desensitized to them. The issue of gun control was a platform point for politicians and not much more. When students were gunned down in their classrooms, the nation would watch the news, pray for their families and forget as soon as the next news cycle took over. Therefore, the nation was stunned after one of the latest mass shootings, at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School. Seventeen people were murdered at Stoneman Douglas in a tragic occurrence that those living in the United States have faced more than once in recent years. However, what came next was an unprecedented response to a school shooting, which has forced citizens on both sides of

the political aisle to take a look at their beliefs, the safety of our nation’s children and what it truly looks like to be an actively engaged American. The response from the surviving students in Parkland has turned into a nationwide movement, the March for Our Lives. After the shooting, students from Stoneman Douglas almost immediately began calling for change. They appeared on news channels, in articles in every major newspaper, and sparked conversation all over social media, and in homes across the country. The students had a major unifying message. They believe that, while the shooter is ultimately responsible for this horrible crime, the complacency and inaction of our nation’s government has allowed gun culture to reach a dangerous boiling point. Their message culminates in the March for Our Lives, taking place in Washington, D.C. and across the nation. The march is organized by the surviving students of the Parkland shooting and calls for legislative action on the topic of gun control. On the March for Our Lives website, there is a petition that calls for three specific actions by elected oﬃcials: 1. Passing a law to ban the sale of assault weapons like the ones used in Las Vegas, Orlando, Sutherland Springs, Aurora, Sandy Hook and, most recently—to kill 17 innocent people and injure more than a dozen others— at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School.

Nish Gorczyca / The University News

2. Prohibiting the sale of high-capacity magazines such as the ones the shooter at Stoneman Douglas—and so many other recent mass shootings used. 3. Closing the loophole in the background check law that allows dangerous people who should not be allowed to purchase firearms to slip through the cracks and buy guns online or at gun shows. Here in St. Louis, the march will begin at Union Station at 10 a.m. on Saturday, March 24, and will continue down Market Street to the Gateway Arch. Students from the St. Louis area were heavily involved in the planning of the march. Organizers of the St. Louis march said, “This movement is for every life lost — in places of worship, workplaces, shopping malls and in our neighborhoods. Everywhere and anywhere. Therefore, we are marching to demand ‘that a comprehensive and eﬀective bill be immediately brought before Congress to address these gun issues.’” There will be many speakers at the St. Louis march as well, including State Representative Bruce Franks Jr., who has had experience with gun violence. Here at SLU, many students are preparing to attend the March for Our Lives on Saturday. On Wednesday, the SLU College Democrats held a sign-making event and plan on taking a group to the march. SLU College Democrats President Robert Lasky spoke about the importance of showing up for the march, saying, “marches are great ways to show public opinion on a certain issue, and public opinion has a very long track record of swaying the opinion of public oﬃcials.” He continues, “the more people that show up the louder voice we have together, and that’s important, because this is about people’s lives.”

News

Students share #WhyWeMarch

I will be attending the March For Our Lives protest in St. Louis with many of my fellow students. As a member of the Micah program, I know that my friends who have worked in the greater St. Louis community will be there alongside me. I think that informed action, in relation to any social issue, must be deliberate, loud and encompassing of the communities and cultures that are most affected by a given issue. In this case, the lives of students in the U.S. are at risk because of laissez-faire gun laws and the conflicting interests of funded politicians. The unfortunate reality of gun reform is that change will ultimately have to occur from the top down through the implementation and/ or reworking of laws. That said, when enough people come together to pressure officials and business leaders, the possibility for lasting change only increases. It’s time to open up the “ground”; I hope to see you there.

CHARLIE REVORD, Contributor

March 22, 2018

TOM BERGAN, Staff Writer The March for Our Lives is more than a one-day event. While yes, there will be hundreds of gatherings across the country this Saturday to protest the lack of gun restrictions that have led to the death of thousands of U.S. citizens, it will continue on long past the final step is marched. The march will continue by voting out of office anyone who operates as a pawn of the National Rifle Association. Students across the nation are fully recognizing that their right to live and learn without the fear of being murdered is one that is worth fighting for. On Saturday, at the St. Louis March for Our Lives, I will be doing everything I can to engage with individuals at the March, by removing the hat with which I carry my personal views, and replacing it with a passion for voter registration. In order to achieve large-scale change, young people must show up to the polls. Historically, the voice and opinion of young people has been silenced and shut down, disengaging many from the political process, which leads to horrendous voter turnout of young people in elections. 2018 is the year that this changes.

As fellow students, it is important to contribute—in some way—to the fight to end gun violence; as primary victims, we are the primary advocates. Only when our voices are heard in collective unison can we expect concrete legislative outcomes. If you are planning to attend the march on Saturday, be sure to wear the formal colors of the movement—black and gray—and put together a handmade sign. Some examples include “Protect Kids Not Guns” or “Enough is Enough.” If you’re unable to attend, consider donating to March For Our Lives’ GoFundMe page (of all the money that it raises-$2 million goes to the victims’ funds) or sponsoring a student to attend a march by contacting info@marchforourlives.com.

SURAJ MARWAHA, Contributor

Alex Wong / Getty Images

The Bloom Café opens doors for all By MEREDYTH STAUNCH Managing Editor

Beyond its signature Breakfast Bloom sandwiches and assortment of flavored coffees and Numi Organic Teas, The Bloom Café offers a greater service to the community that exceeds satisfying stomachs. As the new Paraquad enterprise, The Bloom Café held its grand opening on March 21 on 5200 Oakland Ave., but unlike most brunch restaurants, the staff dedicates itself to providing job training for people with disabilities. Paraquad is a nonprofit, and its mission entails empowering people with disabilities to improve their independence through choice and opportunity. Its new café capitalizes a three-step regimen for the employees: A 12-week training program, paid internship and the culminating job placement. The training curriculum will launch in June 2018 and will be held each spring,

summer and fall thereafter. Sessions run Monday through Friday and provide lessons in food handling and preparation, customer service and proper work etiquette. Each student receives a ServSafe certification through the National Restaurant Association upon completion of training. From the training program, the trainees will become interns at The Bloom Café and partnering restaurants within the St. Louis area, so they can further advance their professional skills. The Bloom Café’s staff provides ongoing support to the interns through one-on-one job training. Upon completion of the internship, the interns will be considered “job ready,” but they will continue to receive support from Paraquad through resume writing, financial planning and job searching. The brainchild of The Bloom Café blossomed from Paraquad’s mission to dispel the myths associated in hiring people with disabilities. On average, people with

disabilities are twice as likely to be unemployed and live in poverty, according to the Bloom Café’s website. Attempting to counteract these statistics within the St. Louis area, Paraquad has been helping these people for over 45 years to receive the necessary training and skill building in preparation for their first job experience. The Bloom Café is located adjacent to Paraquad, and the café showcases a vibrant atmosphere with windows surrounding its customers and flowers tended by workers at the Missouri Botanical Gardens. Additionally, it features outdoor seating and a separate “garden room” for a business meeting or private party. “Our goal is to be the go-to destination for good food, good service and good training opportunities for people with disabilities,” Paraquad President and CEO Aimee Wehmeier said. The menu parallels the setting, providing fresh salads, signature soups in honor of its location in Dogtown, sandwiches, and breakfast specials. Accessibility was key in creating The Bloom Café and its menu. “We don’t want it to be really expensive, but we want it to be healthy and accessible to everyone,” Beth Jantz, project manager of The Bloom Café, said.

Tweets

of the week @nytimes

Since 1851, obituaries in The New York Times have been dominated by white men. Now, we’re adding the stories of more women. We’ll be adding to this collection, as Overlooked becomes a regular feature in the obituaries section.

@CNN

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg vows to protect data after a “breach of trust” between the social network and its users. He faces questions on CNN at 9 p.m. ET. @SLU_Official

Have you registered yet? Students, staff, faculty, alumni, parents and community members are all invited to join us for Showers of Service on April 21. Sign up now: apo.slu. edu/sos

@ABC

Steven Seagal has denied accusations of sexual assault and rape that were made by two women during a press conference Monday.

@POTUS

“Together, we will end the scourge of drug addiction in America once and for all. We will win. We will beat it.” From grief and devastation to recovery and hope, the stories of the opioid crisis in America must be heard. Submit yours: 45.wh.gov/CrisisNextDoor

March 22, 2018

News

Trenton Almgren-Davis / The University News

FREE TO BE: Cece McDonald inspires SLU students to act in solidarity.

Cece speaks, SLU listens By GRANT MAYFIELD Identity Editor

Activist Cece McDonald spoke to students, faculty, staﬀ and community members in the Center for Global Citizenship Wednesday night. The hour-long talk focused mostly on McDonald’s experience growing up as a black, transgender woman, her own time in prison and the prisonindustrial complex. Following the speech, she answered questions from the audience about self care, choosing her name and her plans for the future. The event was sponsored by Free to Be, the Cross Cultural Center, the Student Involvement Center and Great Issues Committee. In June of 2011, McDonald was walking to a grocery store with friends near her apartment in Minneapolis when they were accosted by a group of neo-nazi, white supremacists. During the altercation, McDonald was hit over the head with a glass. After warning her assailants that she was carrying a weapon, McDonald used a pair of scissors to defend herself, ultimately stabbing a man who died at the scene. McDonald was charged with two counts of second-degree murder and eventually took a plea bargain. She was found guilty of second-degree manslaughter after the judge determined she had not acted in self defense. She went on to serve 19 months in a men’s correctional facility though she identifies as female. Although McDonald’s notoriety and platform stem from this tragic incident, she doesn’t want it to define her. “I don’t want to keep living through this story. I want to change the world in so many ways,” she said. She spoke at length about the many dehumanizing aspects of being

incarcerated and how she found strength in an outpouring of support from around the world. Letters arrived in her jail cell from as far away as Tokyo as more people learned of her story. These interactions as well as reading books like “The New Jim Crow” by Michelle Alexander and “Are Prisons Obsolete” by Angela Davis got her through the toughest times. McDonald’s vision for the future is one that challenges the way many think of criminal justice and incarceration. She also challenges the gender binary that places all people in categories of either male or female, man or woman. She spoke of a recent conversation with her brother in which she explained how she is forced to exist outside of this binary. Because she was assigned ‘male’ at birth and only later was able to reclaim her womanhood, she is viewed by many as neither man nor woman. This diﬃcult discussion is one she believes we should all be having in our own homes with our own families. She urged those in the audience to “center the voices of the most marginalized,” repeating the phrase three times throughout the night. “F*** ally!” she shouted. “I hate that word. We need to start acting on the things we say we believe. Start acting in solidarity.” The crowd of several dozen people agreed. Although the audience didn’t quite fill the space, McDonald was not discouraged. While she doesn’t believe too much in faith, she quoted the bible in regards to the movement for black, trans lives. “You have to have the faith of a mustard seed and that’s pretty f***ing small.”

Nish Gorczyca / The University News

TOXIC TERROR: Saint Louis’ history with radioactive materials may finally be catching up to it, threatening catastrophy to the suburbs nearby.

Toxic townships

Landfill leak raises concerns By RILEY MACK Staff Writer

The world’s oldest nuclear weapons’ waste could be in the air, the soil or even within homes. What seemed like a wonderful place to raise children has turned into a nightmare for the citizens of the St. Louis suburbs. These families are living just miles from the West Lake Landfill, which was given the Superfund status in the 90s: A title received only by the most contaminated areas in the country. With little help from the government, residents are dying due to rare cancers that come from exposure to what appears to be toxic elements. Their homes were unknowingly a part of the birth of the atomic age. It all began in 1942, when St. Louis was selected as a center for holding uranium in order to assemble the first atomic bomb. Throughout the following 25 years, the radioactive waste was transported in small increments to the northern suburbs of St. Louis, where eventually all 47,000 tons were dumped. Now, the landfill contains an underground fire, known as a Subsurface Smoldering Event; the fire is burning and emitting toxins like uranium, thorium and radium, where it can be carried miles from the site of the burn, right up to the doorstep of these homes, where contamination can occur. Following recent media attention toward groups like Just Moms STL, a documentary called “Atomic Homefront” that

was released in 2017, publicized the issue and ultimately gained attention for the community by showcasing personal stories. One community member within the documentary named Anna Vasilenok states in a public meeting that she moved from Chernobyl in order to relieve her family of this type of tragedy, then went on to tearfully recall all the family members she lost from cancer due to the nuclear disaster. She asked the government oﬃcials within the meeting “Do you want that for your children? Who will pay for all the expenses of cancer?” Staring into the sympathizing audience surrounding her, Vasilenok said “the government has to be held responsible,” and that the government oﬃcials they had elected only had interests in their own money. The community “can’t be quiet anymore,” she vehemently declared. Like Vasilenok, the Just Moms STL group speaks volumes for this issue and surpasses their namesake with their important mission. The early days of this society was a Facebook page where worried community members posted their grievances and advice on the situation. When the conditions of the environment escalated, so did the responsibilities of the group. Dawn Chapman, a forthright activist and co-founder of the group states that cleaning up the St. Louis area is their task be-

See “Our toxic...” on page 5

News

March 22, 2018

Let Us Introduce You:

Emily Duncan By EM MILLER Staff Writer

Sophomore Emily Duncan was originally partly drawn to Saint Louis University due to its focus on service. As someone who is involved in various service efforts, Duncan decided that SLU was the perfect school because of the city environment and how SLU is not closed off. “There are a lot of opportunities to go off into the community, and I liked the idea of a college with a focus on service,” said Duncan. In addition, Saint Louis University was close to Duncan’s home in Highland, Illinois. Duncan is pursuing her Bachelor of Science in biochemistry, a subject that she finds fascinating. When asked why she chose to major in biochemistry, Duncan responded, “Going into college, I knew I didn’t want to major in just biology or chemistry, because I liked both, and I didn’t really know what it all entailed yet. This year I learned that biochemistry incorporates the simplest elements of chemistry and how they become compounds inside our body, and I love that kind of information.” Duncan’s favorite class that she has

taken at SLU is organic chemistry. “I love the challenging aspect of it,” Duncan said with a laugh. “I might not always know the answer but there’s a problemsolving aspect to orgo that’s like solving a puzzle, and I just like that a lot.” After graduating, Duncan plans to further her education and become a doctor, something that she is pursuing right now through her involvement in Saint Louis University’s Medical Scholars program. When asked where she wanted to attend medical school, Duncan said, “Hopefully, I’ll go to SLU, and right now I’m interested in gastroenterology.” Duncan’s desire to work as a doctor partly came from her father. “My dad was a paramedic, so I saw the impact he made on the community, and I knew that I wanted to do something where individuals would look to me for help,” said Duncan. “It wasn’t until high school that I realized I wanted to do it through medicine. I joined a Future Medical Careers club, which showed me all the different positions inside the medical professions.” Duncan is involved in a variety of on-campus activities outside of her aca-

demics. Along with being an avid member of AED and the American Society of Biochemistry and Molecular Biology, Duncan is involved with SLU Lions Club and Student United Way. Both SLU Lions Club and Student United Way are involved in service throughout the St. Louis community, something which Duncan is passionate about. Duncan also volunteers at SLU Hospital as an emergency department ambassador. In her free time, Duncan paints, which she began during middle school. Despite painting primarily landscapes, she has never seen Bob Ross paint anything. An entirely self-taught painter who mainly uses acrylics, Duncan’s favorite painting is a landscape that she described as “Kind of an abstract landscape, with fog [and] a green undertone. The closest image is a hill with a tree that has pink and purple blooms and a wooden swing.” Along with painting, Duncan also enjoys reading books when she has the time. Her favorite genres to read are young adult novels and mystery novels, and her favorite book of all time is “Throne of Glass.”

Our toxic township Continued from Page 4 cause “it’s do or die, literally.” They have been a pivotal role in the intervention of media (and therefore, policymakers) to create real change for their community. They even extended their activism to marching in Washington when Gina McCarthy, a former administrator for the EPA, wouldn’t answer their emails. Unfortunately, the Just Moms STL organization’s suspicions were correct. In August 2015, soil was found to be contaminated with Thorium 230 at St. Cin Park, a popular playground for children and high schoolers in the Hazelwood area. The community arranged an emergency meeting with local oﬃcials, where they learned that the parks are still open for families and children to visit; enraged, community members stepped forward to challenge these representatives. One man announces that “the original point where [the waste] had come from took [his] father” and now, “this park has taken [his] son”—all of this taking place in the parks

where the gates are still wide open. Hazelwood Parks City Manager Matthew Zimmerman disconcertedly stated back to the distraught families, “If we didn’t have parks there, then where would the children go?” As of January 2018, it has been declared that all companies liable for the dumping owe an expected cost of $236 million, which is a large increase from the project fund of $24.5 million in previous years. Although not enough to form a buy-out option for those who need the funds to move out of their contaminated homes, it is physical and monetary action that is heavily needed for these residents. It will partially excavate tons of radioactive waste from the Republic Landfill in St. Louis over the next five years. Ironically, a large sign posted in front of Republic Landfill’s site brightly states that “Customer satisfaction is the key to our success!” Whether this is the satisfaction of the community members, or of their own greedy agenda is up to the lawmakers to decide.

Photo courtesy of Connie Duncan

Duncan exhibits her incandescant optimism in her high school senior photo.

THE SLU SCOOP All Information Provided by Department of Public Safety and Emergency Preparedness

Tuesday, March 13 2:33 p.m. FIRE ALARM (Informational) Maintenance failed to notify dispatch when they set off the lower level water pump fire alarm while working in the basement of Marchetti Towers West. DPS arrived and discovered the workers. Tuesday, March 14 7:47 a.m. DISTURBANCE DPS was contacted by an university Instructor to assist in the removal of a student who had been disrupting the Envrionmental Job Training Program over the past three weeks. The student was removed without incident. Be a Responsible Billiken STOP. CALL. REPORT. 314-977-3000 witness.slu.edu dps.slu.edu

Arts&Entertainment UNews

March 22, 2018 arts@unewsonline.com Natalie Riopelle, Arts Editor Chandana Kamaraj, Assoc. Arts Editor

The business of YouTube By NATALIE RIOPELLE Arts Editor

The last few decades have brought the world an incredible amount of innovation. Of course, the internet grew in accessibility and scope, cellphones became something of a necessity and big budget movies were transported from multiplexes into the homes of millions through streaming services. Computers can be carried in backpacks, and calls can be answered on wristwatches—the times, they are a-changin’. Still, one of the most crucial changes that has occurred is the ease with which people can now communicate, messages can be disseminated, and people can be made famous with the click of a button. In this lies the power of YouTube. Founded in 2005, YouTube has given rise to a generation that has never doubted its ability to be seen. Gone are the days when reaching the homes of millions required millions. Now all that is needed is a camera and an internet connection—a personality and interesting things to say

are helpful but certainly not mandatory. Talent remains optional. Suddenly, everyone and their great-aunt Edith can upload videos of nearly anything to be seen by nearly anyone. This is amazing, but it has also led to a huge range in quality. On one hand, there are the try-nots, people who post repetitive videos that make up for a complete lack of substance with lots of yelling and phony excitement (a la Jake Paul—don’t look him up; he doesn’t need more views or more money). On the other hand are channels like Red Letter Media, run by actual filmmakers who gleefully and humorously review movies by using clever framing devices and tight editing. These are people with skill. They deserve views and the money that comes with them. But that’s the thing, isn’t it? YouTube is no longer just a reservoir for shoddy home videos or failed stand-up routines. YouTube is a genuine star creator. It is a talent finder See “YouTube” on Page 8

Courtesy of Red Letter Media

‘Love, Simon’ rethinks romance genre

Courtesy of 20th Century Fox

GROWING UP: Nick Robinson stars as Simon Spier (far right) who faces the typical pressures of high school, along with the added stress of keeping his sexuality a secret. By TARA TABIBI Contributor

I can name a dozen teen flicks with a dozen plot elements in common with Greg Berlanti’s “Love, Simon.” Based on Becky Albertalli’s teen fiction novel, “Simon vs. The Homo Sapiens Agenda,” the film “Love, Simon” follows the self-proclaimed “just-like-you” Simon Spier (Nick Robinson) as he struggles to balance school, friends, family and love—except there’s just one small twist: Simon happens to be gay. In terms of plot, “Love, Simon” leaves something to be desired; nearly every cliché you can think of in terms of a high school romantic comedy makes its way into this movie. Extremely nice high school with kids wandering around like it’s 1980 (how much property tax do I have to pay to go to that school)? Check. Throwing a party filled with underage drinking and sex (do parents actually leave town or is that a myth)? Check. Drama

department intent on putting on a stellar show with a not-sostellar cast? Check. Annoying vice principal with a penchant for cellphones and a tendency to get a little too far up your business? Check (these people really exist). Blackmail as a socially acceptable means to get what you want? Check (have we re-

In terms of plot, “Love, Simon” leaves something to be desired; nearly every cliché of a high school romantic comedy makes its way into this movie.

ally learned nothing from “Gossip Girl?”). A declaration of love as the entire school looks on in admiration? Check, check and check. Watching “Love, Simon” was a spur of the moment decision for me. It was also my first

time going to the movies since junior year of high school. But spring break was coming to an end when I realized I had spent it either staring at books or watching “Say Yes to the Dress” marathons in a near vegetative state, and I knew I needed something new. That’s why (after paying $10 for the ticket and another $10 for popcorn and drinks), I was surprised to find that “Love, Simon” sold out on its opening night in my fairly conservative hometown. The theater I watched “Love, Simon” in happened to be nearly empty on that particular Friday night. Except for the small group of teenagers sitting behind us and the older man two seats away, my friend and I were the only ones in attendance. The movie starts out as innocently as any teen flick, with Simon picking up each of his friends for school. The plot thickens when, after exchanging several emails with a mystery pen pal, Simon accidentally leaves his See “Love, Simon” on Page 8

Arts

March 22, 2018

Live at â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Late Show with Colbertâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; By MADISYN SIEBERT Staff Writer

Courtesy of CBS

BREAKFAST. LUNCH. OPPORTUNITY. " # ! ! " ! !

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Over spring break, I was fortunate to get the opportunity to go to New York City. I was even more fortunate because I was able to get tickets to â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.â&#x20AC;? I signed up a month in advance for the opportunity to get tickets and was alerted two weeks before the show that I had been awarded tickets. I arrived at the famous Ed Sullivan Theater on Broadway at 3:15 p.m. and, up until 6 p.m., it was all waiting in line. We were eventually brought into the venue and were given our seats for the show. The show started with a stand up gig from Paul Mecurio, the resident comedian for the Colbert Show when he is not on tour. He got the crowd engaged by going up to random members of the audience and striking up conversations or poking fun at them. After Mecurio left the stage, Colbertâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s band Stay Human featuring Jon Batiste took the stage and was supposed to get the audience on their feet and out of their chairs, but personally speaking, the band was overdrawn and let every one of their performers have a solo, which just led to more waiting than necessary. The surprise occurred at the end of the bandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s performance with Colbert running on stage to greet the band, sending the crowd into an eruption of cheers. Colbert took a minute to introduce himself once the audience had calmed down and explained how the show was going to work. He then did a rapid fire of questions from the crowd, answering questions like his favorite color all the way to his worst first date. Soon after, he took his mark and then they began to record â&#x20AC;&#x153;live on tapeâ&#x20AC;? for the show that evening. He started oďŹ&#x20AC; with his monologue, which as you can expect with Colbert mostly was made up of jokes about President Trump. After the intro, Colbert welcomed his first guest of the evening, Tom Brady. Brady was up to joke with Colbert as he promoted his new book, â&#x20AC;&#x153;The TB12 Method: How to Achieve a Lifetime of Sustained Peak Performance.â&#x20AC;? He gave Colbert a deep tissue massage to â&#x20AC;&#x153;make his muscles longer,â&#x20AC;? ate a strawberry for the first time and had a beer chugging contest with the host. The segment was upbeat and hilarious, even for people who are not New England Patriot fans. The next guest Colbert welcomed onto the stage with him was Sean

Bean. During his segment, Colbert made Bean distinguish between his regular British accent, a Yorkshire accent and then a â&#x20AC;&#x153;properâ&#x20AC;? British accent. He also showed Bean, and the audience, a plaster cast of Beanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s face and how frightening his turned out compared to his fellow actors on â&#x20AC;&#x153;Lord of the Rings.â&#x20AC;? Colbert then alerted the audience that, in addition to the last guest, we would be able to see a bonus guest, since he would not be able to film the day of the show. Colbert then welcomed Paul Giamatti who was promoting his new HBO show, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Billions.â&#x20AC;? They talked about their love of science fiction novels, even exchanging a couple books on stage, and Giamatti also discussed the conspiracy theories he believes to be true. Colbert soon settled him down and said that he has a Facebook group that is avidly trying to get Giamatti his own wax figure. He surprised Giamatti by then bringing out an old wax statue they brought from a closed-down wax museum and placed a Paul Giamatti face mask over the wax figure to oďŹ&#x192;cially make it his own wax figure. On the way out of the studio, guests were encouraged to take pictures with the wax statue. Finally, the show closed out with Emmy Blotnick, an up-and-coming comedian, who is currently the writer for â&#x20AC;&#x153;The President Showâ&#x20AC;? on Comedy Central and will be having her own half-an-hour stand-up show premiering later this year. All I can say was that it was awkward and not exactly my cup of tea, her persona giving oďŹ&#x20AC; the wrong vibe for the jokes she was telling. Overall, the show as a whole was entertaining and it was a very diďŹ&#x20AC;erent experience to be in the same room as they film versus just watching it on your TV later that evening. If you ever get the chance to watch a live recording of the show, I would recommend it, because it is something you do not have the opportunity to experience every day. With the bulk of the sound design being captured and subsequently manipulated and recombined, this adds to the ominous undertones and themes suggested by the lighting and portrayal of the characters. This play may be mind boggling, but the humor and emotional connection with the characters keeps audience members engaged for the entire 90 minutes. The University Theatre did a remarkable job with the production, ensuring not a single detail was amiss.

8 March 22, 2018

Arts

‘Love, Simon’: Simple love story for all tical to “Love, Simon,” but not one of those films treats gay characters as more than a token, comic relief or at emails open only for Martin (Logan best a sidekick with a valley-girl tone Miller) to accidentally find Simon’s to his voice. Simon’s character parallels secret. Martin proceeds to blackmany of the same characters we’ve seen mail Simon in exchange for keeping before. From Lindsay Lohan’s Cady his pen pal (and sexuHeron to (the lesser known ality) a secret. In one but equally iconic) Mandy particular sequence, Although “Simon” Gilbert in “Picture This,” Simon, cursing at Simon faces—and eventucan hardly be the injustice of it all, ally overcomes—the same considered Oscar wonders why people perils of our favorite teen need to “come out” as bait, it is important flick characters. Although gay. “Why is straight can hardly be in its own right. “Simon” the assumption?” he considered Oscar bait, it is laments, as the seimportant in its own right. quence shows Simon’s Regardless of where you heterosexual friends stand on the Kinsey Scale, informing their distraught parents you can empathize with Simon’s charof being heterosexual. acter because you’ve seen a version of “Love, Simon” sticks out for the him in a diﬀerent movie. Besides, who same reason it blends in. I can name wouldn’t love the romance in “Love, Sia dozen films with plots nearly idenmon”? (I swooned). Continued from Page 6

Courtesy of 20th Century Fox

YouTube: Moneymaker Continued from Page 6

and a get-rich-quick scheme all in one, because it isn’t a hobby. YouTube is a career. For those who don’t know, there is a fair amount of wealth to be harvested through “making it big” on YouTube. Here’s the simplified version: If a channel does well, advertisers can pay YouTube to play ads during that channel’s videos, which act like commercial breaks. The channel itself then gets a subset of that advertisement money, which they earn based on the number of views they receive per video. More views mean more money. And this isn’t chump change. Though not the standard, people have made millions through careers on YouTube. The question then becomes: Who are we rewarding? In the case of people like Jake Paul, and his older brother Logan—who both

have very lucrative channels with massive followings—obnoxiousness has brought them hefty bank accounts. These boys traffic in loud humor, often involving unwitting individuals out in public. Logan Paul even used a picture of a deceased person, who had recently committed suicide in the infamous Japanese “Suicide Forest,” to garner more views for his video. People as a whole reacted harshly against his actions, as they should, but he is not any less famous on YouTube now that he is also infamous. He is not any less rich. YouTube has brought the public another way to view others; it has also brought the public another way to be viewed and this viewing is not without consequence. This is not to say that people must become paranoid about who and what they watch on YouTube, but it is important to remember that there is money involved. The eyes of an audience correlate directly to the size of these YouTubers’ bank accounts, so we must always ask ourselves: Who do we want to be paying?

[YouTube] has also brought the public another way to be viewed and this viewing is not without consequence.

To do in STL Taste of Indian Culture Festival Sat. Apr. 7 Chesterfield Ampitheater

The Color Purple

Tues. Mar. 20 - Sun. Apr. 1 The Fabulous Fox

“Isle of Dogs”

Release: Fri. Mar. 23

St. Louis Folk and Roots Thurs. Mar. 22 - Sat. Mar. 24 Sheldon Concert Hall

Matt and Kim Tues. Mar. 27 The Pageant

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March 22, 2018

Needed: News Editor and Staff Writers!!!

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March 22, 2018

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Photography

Billikens Abroad Photos By Emma Carmody

Tenerife, Spain

Portugal

Copenhagen, Denmark

Granada, Spain

Switzerland

March 22, 2018

SLU Spring Break 2018

HAWAII- Photos courtesy of Victoria Segovia

FLORIDA- Photos courtesy of Joe Reyes

FLORIDA- Photos courtesy of SLU Crew Team

Photography

HAWAII- Photos courtesy of Victoria Segovia

FLORIDA- Photos courtesy of Joe Reyes

FLORIDA- Photos courtesy of SLU Crew Team

March 22, 2018

Photography

March 22, 2018

Grand opening of Bloom Cafe welcomes all Photos By MEREDYTH STAUNCH Managing Editor

Upper Left: Paraquad President and CEO Aimee Wehmeier and Paraquad Peer Services Specialist Anna Corbitt welcomed guests into The Bloom Cafe. Paraquad empowers people with disabilities to increase their independent living. Upper Right: While waiting in line outside to enter The Bloom Cafe, a server brought samples of her selected pastries: cinnamon rolls, coffee cake and brownies. Middle Left: In order to keep the line moving, each guest was handed a menu with various coffees, breakfast and lunch selections to keep the traffic flowing. Bottom Right: At 10 a.m. on March 21, culinary director Joe Wilson cut the ceremonial ribbon to The Bloom Cafe, and people shuffled inside soon after. Bottom Left: Biting into her sub sandwich, Lisa Lewis attended The Bloom Cafe’s grand opening. Lewis is a Paraquad client who has reaped the benefits from the organization as she has brought in a steady income through its program.

Sports

March 22, 2018 sports@unewsonline.com Bobby Stilwell, Sports Editor Monica Ryan, Assoc. Sports Editor

Softball rockets through tournament play By Bobby Stilwell Sports Editor

Trenton Almgren-Davis / The University News

CHARGE: Senior infielder Allie Macfarlane fields a ground ball against SIU. She hit her fifth career grand slam at the Rock Chalk Challenge.

Softball posted a 13-11 record in tournament play, before opening up play at the Billiken Sports Center against Murray State and Southern Illinois. SLU posted a 1-4 record in the Petersen Hotels Invitational, with the sole win coming against Miami, Ohio on Friday, Feb. 9. SLU posted a 6-0 win, which included freshman outfielder Sadie Wise’s first collegiate home run, a two-run blast in the seventh. A pair of wins came for the Billikens in the Louisiana Tech Invitational. SLU short-gamed Alcorn State on Friday, Feb. 23, with a 10-2 win. SLU later shut out South Dakota 6-0 on Saturday, Feb. 24. SLU continued to improve with three wins in the Ole Miss Classic. SLU posted a pair of wins over Chattanooga on Friday, March 2 and Sunday, March 4. The first win, a 5-2 rout, not only included a bases-clearing triple from senior infielder Allie Macfarlane but was also Head Coach Christy Connoyer’s 200th victory as the Billikens’ head coach. The second win over Chattanooga was a bit tighter, at 5-3, but senior pitcher Maddie Baalman pitched her way out of a bases-loaded jam in the fourth. Baalman kept Chattanooga from scoring any further in the fifth and seventh. SLU also posted a 5-3 win over UT Martin with Baalman getting a pair of wins to even her record at 4-4 on the year. SLU posted its best record yet at the EKU Invitational, only losing one of the five games. Wins came against Northern Illinois, Western Carolina and Akron (twice). On Friday, March 9, SLU blanked Northern Illinois 4-0, followed by a 5-1 rout of Western Carolina. Junior designated hitter Kaylyn Breitbach blasted her first homer of the season in the seventh in the first win over Akron on Saturday, March 10. SLU beat Akron 9-7. SLU then shortgamed Akron the next day, Sunday, March 11. SLU hit four homeruns in the 12-2 win. The final regular-season tournament for the Billikens was the Rock Chalk Challenge, where they posted a 3-2 record. In

the first day of play, Friday, March 16, SLU picked up a pair of wins. SLU first beat Western Illinois 5-4, with Wise blasting a two-run shot in the third. In the second game, a 6-4 win over UMKC, Wise blasted a three-run shot in the first. On Sunday, March 18, the Billikens posted a 7-3 win over Murray State, with a solo shot from Wise and a walk-off grand slam from Macfarlane, the fifth of her career. SLU won the home opener over Murray State, but it was a tight contest. In the 5-4 win, SLU struck early in the first with a single from junior outfielder Lauren Lomax and freshman outfielder Kat Lane reaching first on an error. Wise brought both of them home on a three-run homer over the center field wall, her ninth of the season. Murray State scored an unearned run in the second, but Lawson answered with a solo shot in the second, her second of the season. SLU’s last bit of offense was a sacrifice fly in the third by Macfarlane. Murray State later tallied two runs in the fourth. Baalman left the game at the end of the fourth, Junior Kallen Loveless pitched three innings of relief. Loveless held Murray State to just a lone unearned run in the sixth and set Murray State down in order in the seventh on the way to her first save of the season. The momentum didn’t carry over to the game against Southern Illinois on Wednesday, March 21, when the Billikens fell 9-2 to the Salukis. SIU scored two runs in the first, hit a two-run shot in the third, a solo shot in the fifth and tallied four runs in the sixth. SLU’s offense came to life in the sixth when Wise hit an RBI single with Macfarlane repeating the same feat. This was the only offense for the Billikens. St. Joseph’s comes to town for a threegame set on Saturday, March 24 and Sunday, March 25. Saturday’s doubleheader and Sunday’s single game both start at noon.

Sports

March 22, 2018

Sadie Wise wants to “just win” By Erin McClelland Staﬀ Writer

Trenton Almgren-Davis / The University News SLUGGING: Freshman outfielder Sadie Wise watches a fly ball leave the bat against SIU.

CHEER

WHO TO CHEER TONY BENNETT The University of Virginia head coach lost with class, and it showed in his postgame presser after UMBC upset the Cavaliers in the first round of the NCAA Tournament.

“I don’t like to look at my own stats,” said freshman softball outfielder, Sadie Wise. “I don’t focus on numbers, I would rather go out there and just win.” Her strategy must be working because in her first 25 games as a Billiken, Sadie has broken the SLU record for most home runs hit by a freshman in a single season with nine, so far. Not only has she broken a record, she currently leads the team in batting average (.422), runs (25), hits (35), doubles (10), RBIs (28), home runs (9), slugging percentage (.867) and on-base percentage (.500). She has also been named Atlantic 10 Rookie of the Week three times this season, only four weeks into the awards. She was the first rookie to get the award in 2018 and she has earned it the last two consecutive weeks. Sadie began playing softball at the early age of five, but unlike most young kids who play tee ball for the first few years, she jumped right into real softball. She began her club career at eight with travel ball and played up through high school. At Kirkwood High School, near St. Louis, she was a four-year varsity player for the softball team and played one year of basketball and ran two years of track. Sadie started looking at SLU the summer before her junior year of high school and she is extremely happy with the decision she made to stay close to home.

JEER

“SLU is my home away from home and I feel so comfortable here. I’ve made so many friends in softball, other sports, in my major, and everyone is so welcoming. The teachers are so nice and helpful!” She is an Occupational Therapy major despite originally planning on majoring in physical therapy. She was thinking of PT because of an experience in middle school in which she was able to go to work with her aunt who is a physical therapist. In high school, she wanted to consider other majors and found OT. “I just liked the idea of helping people be more independent and be able to do everyday activities,” she said. Although they are just a little over a month into their season, Sadie said that there are already lots of great memories with her teammates. “All of us get along so well and my teammates are encouraging and funny. They make everything a fun time; we have fun no matter what we’re doing,” she said. A highlight for her is bus karaoke because “it bonded [them] and [they] were forced to be more outgoing. It was a good laugh and everyone was clapping and cheering.” Softball has allowed her to travel all over the country for tournaments; her favorite was California because she was able to do more than just play softball, such as go to the beach. She is excited to travel to the east coast once conference games start because it has new places to visit and new teams to play.

FEAR WHO TO JEER

WHO TO FEAR

NEVADA WOLF PACK In the second round of the NCAA Tournament, Nevada received two technical fouls in three minutes. Despite the unusual feat of getting two quick T’s, they narrowly won over Cincinnati, 75-73.

UMBC The Cinderella of this year’s NCAA Tournament, UMBC upset the No. 1 seed, Virigina. The momentum didn’t carry into the second round, where they lost to Kansas State. But UMBC could be a team to watch in the future...

Sports

This week in Sports

March 22, 2018

Thursday, March 22

Friday, March 23

Saturday, March 24

Tuesday, March 27

Wednesday, March 28

Friday, March 30

Saturday, March 31

Women’s Tennis 3 p.m. @ Davidson

Track & Field @ Arkansas Spring Invitational Fayetteville, Arkansas Baseball 2 p.m. @ Saint Joseph’s

Softball 12 p.m. / 2 p.m. vs. Saint Joseph’s Baseball 1 p.m. @ Saint Joseph’s

Men’s/Women’s Tennis 2:30 p.m. @ Austin Peay Baseball 6 p.m. vs. Eastern Illinois

Softball 4 p.m. vs. Missouri State

Softball 11 a.m. / 1 p.m. vs. George Mason Baseball 6 p.m. vs. VCU

Softball 11 a.m. @ George Mason Women’s Tennis 11 a.m. vs. Omaha Baseball 2 p.m. vs. VCU

Saint Louis University Athletics PITCHING: Junior right-handed pitcher Miller Hogan works on the mound. Hogan pitched three innings of relief against Chicago State and currently holds a team low 2.32 ERA.

Baseball sweeps Purdue, extends win streak to 11 By Sam Glass Staﬀ Writer

The Billikens opened up the 2018 season with a trip down to Kissimmee, Florida over the Feb. 16 weekend for the Sunshine State Classic. The Bills played four games in the tournament and came out with a 1-3 record, taking a win against Pittsburgh. The early season tournaments continued Thursday, Feb. 22 when the Bills opened the Irish Alamo Classic with a game against Notre Dame. The game resulted in a 7-3 loss for the Bills who subsequently

fell to Purdue and Incarnate Word. The Bills came back home from San Antonio, Texas with four losses making their overall record 1-7. The Billikens opened a 10-game home stretch that started Friday, March 2 against Chicago State. The Bills played out the three-game series over the weekend that resulted in three wins for the Bills. The first game of the series took the Bills two innings to win. With three runs in the second inning and four runs in the third inning, the Bills kept the lead largely

thanks to a stellar performance from junior pitcher Miller Hogan who held Chicago oﬀense with three shutout innings. The next two games of the series played out in similar fashion with the Bills outscoring Chicago in both games. The second game saw the Bills take an 8-4 victory thanks to a fifth-inning jolt that saw the Bills tally six runs. The final game of the series was put to rest with a 4-0 win for the Bills, who put one run on the board in the fourth inning and finished the game up in the eighth

with three more runs. On Wednesday, March 7, the Bills were slated to travel to Illinois to take on SIUE but were unable to play due to the weather. Instead the Bills stayed home for a threegame series beginning March 9 against Oakland. The first game gave the Bills a 9-3 win after going up 2-0 in the third inning with a single from senior shortstop Alex King, that netted him two RBIs. The third finished up 4-0 and from then on the Bills See “Wins” on Page 18

18 March 22, 2018 Wins: baseball’s winning streak

Sports

Men finish A-10 tournament play

Continued from Page 17

hit five more runs giving them the win. The next day continued the series with a double header that gave the Bills a six-win streak. The first game resulted in a 6-4 win and more of the same came from the next game with an 8-0 win. The Billikens continued its home streak with a game against SIUE that resulted in another win (5-2) that lead the Bills to a winning 8-7 record for the season. The Bills played their last home game of the stretch against Purdue. The Bills came back with a vengeance after falling to Purdue earlier in the season 5-2. The threegame series was a Billiken sweep, taking all three games from Purdue. The series kicked oﬀ with a double header on Saturday, March 17 that saw the Bills

overpower Purdue with a 15-1 win in the first game and then an 11-9 comeback in the second. The final game of the series was completed on Sunday with a 7-3 Billiken win, giving them an 11-7 record overall and a 10-0 home record. The Bills played a Tuesday road game against Iowa. The game stretched close back and forth with the Bills ultimately triumphing 7-6 with two home runs from King and sophomore catcher Ryan Hernandez. The Billikens open up conference play in its next series at Saint Joseph’s with a 2:00 p.m. start on Friday, March 23.

WBB bows out to Kansas State early in WNIT play

Saint Louis University Athletics PUSH: Senior guard Maddison Gits pushes past a Duquesne defender. Gits scored in double digits twice in the final three games—against Duquesne and K-State. By Erin McClelland Staﬀ Writer

The Women’s Basketball team had a busy two weeks, finishing up the regular season and participating in the Atlantic 10 Championship Tournament. After the tournament, SLU finished the season with a 1715 overall record. Senior Night was held on Feb. 24 in Chaifetz Arena against Dayton, a team that, before its final game, had not lost to a conference for this season. SLU saluted its six seniors with an underdog win over the University of Dayton. At the end of the regular season the

team finished with a 15-14 overall and 9-7 A-10 record. After the win, SLU solidified its spot at seventh in the conference and earned a home game for its first round of the Conference Championship. Following a win on Senior Night, the Billikens were granted the No. 7 seed for the tournament and matched up first with the University of Massachusetts for the first round, which was played at home at Chaifetz Arena. SLU was able to recover from a 16-point deficit in the first half to defeat UMass 70-64 in front of the home crowd. Senior guard Jackie Kemph scored a

Saint Louis University Athletics SWOOSH: Senior guard Davell Roby shoots a free throw against Richmond. Roby scored 26 points in his final game as a Billiken during the A-10 Tournament. By Bobby Stilwell Sports Editor

SLU Men’s Basketball traveled to Washington, D.C. for the Atlantic-10 Championship on Thursday, March 8 and Friday, March 9. SLU beat George Washington 70-63 before falling to eventual A-10 Champion Davidson 78-60. In the game against the Colonials, the Billikens took a 7-2 lead with 15:46 left in the first half. However, that was the only lead the Billikens would see until the second half, as the team was out-scored by the Colonials 30-14 throughout the rest of the half. GW used a 12-0 run and a pair of 6-0 runs to take a 32-21 lead at the half. The game continued to be neck-and-neck throughout the second half, but SLU slowly closed the gap, taking a lead off of a 9-0 rally, with a trey apiece from redshirt senior Aaron Hines, sophomore forward Jalen Johnteam high 21 points—19 coming in the second half—and eight assists in her last game in Chaifetz Arena. Other notable Billikens include junior guard Kerri McMahan, who scored 15 points tying her career high. Senior forward Jenny Vliet also finished with double-digit points in her final game at home with 11, putting her into the 1,000-point club for her career. After defeating UMass, the Bills moved on to face No. 2 seed Duquesne University in the quarter final in Richmond, Virginia. The Billikens were able to power past the Dukes for the 71-65 win. Kemph tied her career high with 28 points. Senior forward Paige Rakers had 15 points on a career high five 3-point field goals and senior guard Maddison Gits earned her

son, and redshirt junior Javon Bess. The Colonials tied the game twice, but an 8-0 rally late in the half—along with five free throws in the closing seconds—clinched the win for SLU. Despite 26 points from senior guard Davell Roby, SLU fell to the Wildcats. The game started off terribly with SLU only putting up 23 points in the first half, trailing 41-23 at the half. SLU closed the gap to 13 points at the 17:54 mark of the second half, with a 6-0 run. This is the closest the Billikens got in the loss. Roby led the Billikens with 26 points, shooting 6-9 from the three-point range. Bess chipped in 13 points and a team-high seven rebounds, with Johnson chipping in 10 points and a perfect 4-4 from the charity stripe. As a team, SLU shot 10-10 from the charity stripe.

11th double-double of the season with 10 points and 15 rebounds. Gits set a school record for most single-season boards with 297 after breaking the previous high of 284 set last year by Sadie Stipanovich. The Bills advanced to the semi-final against No. 6 Saint Joseph’s University where they fell short of making the final. The game marked the program’s third consecutive semi-final appearance for the Atlantic 10 Tournament. The Billikens fell to the Hawks in its final game of the season with a hard fought 58-49 loss. Kemph led the team with 17 points followed by Rakers who had 14. The Billikens trailed from early on in the first quarter and were unable to gain the lead back.

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March 22, 2018

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Opinions&Editorials

March 22, 2018

opinion@unewsonline.com

Fiona Clair, Opinion Editor

Why bipartisanship isn’t always good

Jakob Benedetti Staff Writer

It’s amazing how rare it is for Congress to even come close to passing a bill with bipartisan support, which is why when the Senate passed the “Economic Growth, Regulatory Relief, and Consumer Protection Act” 67-31 on March 14, the media was ecstatic and hailed the bill as “a rare bipartisan accomplishment at a time when Congress is gridlocked on almost all major issues.” So what is this bill, and what major issue did Senate Republicans and Democrats finally put aside their diﬀerences to solve for the betterment of the country? Have they finally closed oﬀshore tax

loopholes? Have they regulat- down the original bill, and ed predatory payday lenders? now they’re joining with conOf course, it was neither of servative Democrats to water these; the legislation that the it down even more. Let’s be Senate manclear: aged to pass W a l l wasn’t someStreet thing that “Craft a bill that appeases n e e d s the Ameri- your richest donors, insert m o r e can people parts that throw the little regulawant, and in tion, fact, it was guy a bone, and then, when not less. something hese discussing the bill, focus Tsorts they very of clearly don’t primarily on the parts that dereguwant. lations benefit the little guy.” The bill are not in question only unessentially popular, repeals key parts of the Dodd- they are dangerous as they Frank regulations. These are serve to recreate many of the rules put in place after the conditions that have led to 2008 crash to prevent the big previous recessions. People banks from intentionally (or who are celebrating this bill accidentally) crashing their as a path to greater economic companies and taking the growth are many of the same whole economy with them. people who celebrated the The Dodd-Frank bill itself was deregulation and tax cuts una compromise between for- dertaken by former President mer President Barack Obama George W. Bush, even though and Republicans who watered those are partly responsible

for the market crashing in 2008. The same is true of the deregulation undertaken by former President Bill Clinton (whose policies had a hand in both the 2001 and 2008 recessions), former President Ronald Reagan (who, despite cult status, did significant harm to the middle class), and former President Herbert Hoover (whose policies caused the Great Depression after the stock market crashed for many of the same reasons as it did in 2008). It seems the U.S. hasn’t learned its lesson: Markets, especially those as complex as the U.S. stock market, need to be well regulated in order to function properly. But let’s talk about this bill specifically. Primarily, the bill would exempt banks with between $50 billion and $250 billion in assets (among the largest that exist) from the bulk of regulations. These banks will see broad reductions in oversight, as well as weakened liquidity requirements (mean-

ing if another 2008-esque crash happens more banks will be at risk of going under, and will need a taxpayer bailout). The bill would also reduce federal standards for mortgage lending and eliminate a rule that banks provide data on who they lend money to, which some observers say could cause another 2008-like housing bubble and lead to greater housing discrimination in the meantime. That’s not to say that everything in this bill is bad; the bill does provide relief specifically for smaller, regional and community banks. Those parts of the bill aren’t the problem, although they are the parts that proponents are focusing on. This is the same model that Bush used to make his tax cuts and deregulation for the rich palatable to the average American: Craft a bill that appeases your richest donors, See “Bipartisanship” on Page 23

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Opinions & Editorials

The woes of senioritis

ments? This is the track we have been placed on since our first day of kindergarten. You go to school, get good grades, participate in school functions, get into a good college, land that internship, graduate, get a job and do that for the rest of your life. So, we all should Megan Anthony Editor-in-Chief be ready for this right? As the world stands right now, The entity that is consuming things aren’t too grim for recent my life at the present moment is college graduates. The Bureau of graduation. I am constantly torn Labor Statistics reports that the between wanting it to come soon- unemployment rate for college er and wanting graduates is at to put it oﬀ in“However, upon re- 2.5%, meaning definitely. My one in 40 are turning from spring mood swings employed. Firstbetween cripyear salary isn’t break, I realized there too shabby eipling senioritis where I can hovering are only 59 days until ther, spend anywhere around $50,000. from 30 min- graduation and I’ve ap- For a single utes to three young adult with plied to two jobs. hours matchno children, that ing my socks isn’t half bad, Induce panic.” the day before I especially if you have a test and a live in one of the paper due to extreme anxiety that top five cities for college graduates causes me to crawl under the cov- (Houston, Austin, San Antonio, ers and retreat to the state of mind Denver and Columbus) each of of a 5-year-old. Either way, I get no which has a decent price of living. homework finished. On paper, graduation looks pretty For 18 years, I have lived within good. a designated schedule carefully However, TIME Magazine replanned around an on-time de- cently reported that more college parture from the academic world students are seeking counseling and a smooth transition into at a record-breaking rate. Citing “adulting.” However, upon return- a study done by The American ing from spring break, I realized College Health Association, 40% there are only 59 days until gradu- of college students reported deation and I’ve applied to two jobs. bilitating depression while 61% reInduce panic. ported extreme anxiety. Why the lack of motivation? There are several proposed Why the desire to pursue a higher reasons for the spike and we’ve degree just to put oﬀ graduation See “Senioritis” on page 23 and looming student loan pay-

March 22, 2018

Book a trip to the Big Easy Arjun Bagai Contributor

Have you come to the realization that a school break is approaching? While midterms and finals are on your mind, you must also be wondering where to go over break. My family and I were contemplating the same thing several months before break, but we came to a consensus that a trip to New Orleans would be a great place to visit. New Orleans is filled with many attractions and restaurants; it is a place you should consider going over break. One amazing place to hit is the French Quarter. Located a few miles north of downtown New Orleans, it is filled with magnificent restaurants and beautiful architecture. New Orleans is known for their gumbo and jambalaya, a dish containing Cajun rice and either meat or vegetables. I tried the jambalaya with chicken and it was phenomenal. The French Quarter also houses Café Du Monde, a coffee shop famous for their beignets. Beignets are deep-fried pastries sprinkled with icing sugar. If you go there over spring break, there will be long lines. However, it is worth the wait for some delicious beignets with coﬀee. Near Café Du Monde is Jackson Square. It houses Saint Louis Cathedral, the oldest cathedral in the United States. There are several musicians near the square, playing their instruments. New Orleans has rich musical roots, with jazz being the prominent musical genre. The houses in the French Quarter are representations of Creole and American townhouses. The French and American cultures played prominent roles in developing New Orleans’ rich culture. These houses are crafted uniquely and

are diﬀerent than those you would see in the Midwest. Another must-see place is Bourbon Street. Located in central downtown, it is known for restaurants and bars. Many go to get a drink and eat delicious food. There is also a lot of dancing in bars and on the street. When I was there, I saw many children playing the drums. They played with accuracy and speed; I could not believe that they played those so fast. I also saw a lot of dancing on the street. It started with a few individuals, and then more and more tagged along to join the fun. It’s a great place to go after a busy, stressful week. I consider Bourbon Street like Las Vegas; it is filled with activity and enthusiasm. Last but not least, the Garden District is home to New Orleans’ amazing buildings. The district is filled with beautifully constructed homes and gardens. The long stretch on Saint Charles Avenue attracts crowds and crowds of individuals. During Mardi Gras, a huge festival in New Orleans and St. Louis, residents throw their beads on trees and electric lines. This makes Garden District sparkle with purple, yellow and green beads. Of course, this is not a comprehensive list of attractions in New Orleans, but these are a few of the main ones. I would also recommend heading to Canal Street, City Park and the National WWII Museum. Canal Street has theatres, streetcars, restaurants and hotels. The City Park has a botanical garden, amusement park, art museum See “Big Easy” on page 23

March 22, 2018

Opinions & Editorials

The science of Uncrustables Monica Ryan Associate Sports Editor

As a college kid on the go, convenience is key. What is more convenient than a ready-made peanut butter and jelly sandwich when you’re on your way out of the dorm, and you’ve only had enough time between classes to grab the laptop charger you realized you forgot after sitting through your first class, dealing with the agonizing pain of listening to the professor instead of scrolling through facebook? Uncrustables makes this possible. It’s the filling snack on the go that allows for you to still have time to grab that necessary charger. So, I’m Uncrustables’ biggest fan. But here in lies the question: Is this peanut butter and jelly treat a true PB&J sandwich or a sweet dessert ravioli? If we’re looking at the grain section of the food pyramid, a whole section is dedicated to grains. According to mypyramid.gov, bread, breakfast cereal, rice and pasta all fall into the grains category. Merriam-Webster’s definition of pasta is “paste in processed form (such as macaroni) or in the form of fresh dough (such as ravioli),” while bread is made from dough as well. The real diﬀerence between the two is if it is risen or not, but I feel that it really doesn’t matter because the bread gets squishy and flat anyway… kind of like a ravioli! Both foods, sandwich or ravioli, have things stuﬀed in the middle of them as well. The internet has recently been blowing up about people calling Uncrustables ravioli, and well, I wonder if the ice cream people felt the same way about ice cream sandwiches… What happens when the ice cream sandwiches get hot? Does it then turn from an ice cream sandwich, to ice cream soup? What makes a

sandwich a sandwich? Is it anything edible that is stuﬀed between something else that is edible? Because the ice cream sandwich debate has me wondering whether an ice cream sandwich can change state. It starts as a sandwich, melts, then turns into soup, freezes, turns into a freezy pop and then defrosts turning back into its once sandwich state. I go so far as to call Uncrustables “dessert” ravioli because the peanut butter and jelly combination leaves a sweet taste in ones mouth after consumption. Which then leads to the question of, are doughnuts dessert? The traditional breakfast pastry doesn’t fit completely into the definition of dessert, “a usually sweet course or dish (as of pastry or ice cream) usually served at the end of a meal.” Doughnuts, traditionally served at breakfast, are the entire meal, not the ending of a meal, and yet Uncrustables are a snack or a meal entirely to themselves, similarly to the doughnut. Interesting… Let’s explore more. Through my limited science background, I have learned about the importance of qualitative observations. The most important observation I’ve made through this controversy is that Uncrustables are enclosed with indents on the bread to keep the ingredients from exploding out. This is most closely related to the structure of ravioli.All sandwiches that I have seen have openings allowing for ingredients to escape from their loose enclosure. Through this inquiry, I’m on the side of those who believe that Smucker’s Uncrustables are in fact (I mean opinion) “dessert ravioli” because of their sweetness and the undeniable enclosure of the bread.

Opinions & Editorials

March 22, 2018

Senioritis Continued from page 21

heard them all: an ever-increasing workload that requires more intelligence, more drive, less sleep, less leisure time, a competitive job market, student loans, bills and trying to keep up with the demands of the world we live in. Earning $50,000 the first year may sound great, but you better have doubled that by year five or you wasted four years on a useless liberal arts degree, and you better be ok with never being able to send your children to private schools. There is nothing wrong with an improving society. Our species advancing is not a bad thing. But how much can we really progress if our cleverness, abstract thinking and imaginations are funneled through a system that tells you if you don’t have a job by time you graduate college, you’re doomed. It not only reduces individualism, but it is killing us from the inside out, and how can we improve the world if you’re burnt out 59 days before you’ve graduated? In 2015, Forbes reported that the number of students studying abroad has doubled since the year 2000, and the majority of these students report a better world view after studying abroad. The number of recent college grads living abroad is also rising. Hundreds upon hundreds of decent-paying jobs lie in the trade industry and require fewer years of school while costing a fraction of what it costs to earn a bachelor’s degree. There are options other than the norm and maybe the recent decline in

mental health among young people is an indication that it’s time to try something different. The most popular class at Yale is called Psychology and the Good Life, a class that focuses on what it takes to be happy. It currently has almost 1,200 students enrolled. It is a pass/fail class to prove “the things Yale undergraduates often connect with life satisfaction—a high grade, a prestigious internship, a highpaying job—do not increase happiness at all,” according to Dr. Santos, the professor of the class. The article continues to say that the science on happiness has changed, and what was expected to make people happy ten years ago is not the same as it is now. If a successful job and a lot of money is no longer what makes us happy, then why do we continue to push the same agenda? Education is never wrong, but the outside pressures of it can be. And if those pressures now lead to mental health problems, then maybe it’s time to go back to learning for the sake of learning and curiosity. If the expectations of what is to come out of education were different, I may not be sitting here, two months from receiving my degree, wondering if all I have to look forward to is rush hour traffic and bills. But that also could be my senioritis talking.

Big Easy

Continued from page 21

and much more. I have not been to the National WWII museum, but it is said to be one of the best museums in the U.S. Traveling around the city is convenient for tourists. You do not need a car rental for travel; you can take the streetcar. The streetcar is a system of transportation through diﬀerent areas of New Orleans. The city provides one day passes that allow you to travel to the French Quarter, Garden District, National WWII museum, Canal Street, Bourbon Street, City

Park and several cemeteries. Have you been convinced of the rich cultural and musical roots in New Orleans as well as what it has to oﬀer to tourists? I challenge you to find places that are must-see sites in addition to the ones I mentioned above. I would highly recommend visiting the city of New Orleans to experience the attractions for yourself.

Bipartisanship Continued from page 20

insert parts that throw the little guy a bone, and then, when discussing the bill, focus primarily on the parts that benefit the little guy. So let’s talk about the real motivations for this bill. Like I said, although proponents of deregulation would have you believe that their utmost concern is for small, community banks, in reality, the institutions who would benefit most are some of the biggest banks in the country. Coincidentally, they also are some of the biggest campaign donors to both Democrats and Republicans, with those Democrats who take the most money from them being the most in favor of deregulation. Since 1990, Wall Street (aka the “securities and investment industry”) has contributed more than $2 billion to political groups and politicians, with nearly $600 million in 2016 alone. That’s not to mention an additional $100 mil-

lion per year in lobbying expenses. Both of these numbers have been increasing as banks get bigger and the cost of corrupting the government is increasingly outweighed by the potential cost of being forced to run a sustainable, honest business. America needs more bank regulation, not less. Not only is it an economic risk with virtually no upside to deregulate Wall Street to any degree, but choosing to not regulate them further is a conscious capitulation to corporate cash. So, the next time you see the media fawning over some bipartisan miracle, whether it’s bank deregulation or giving President Donald Trump more power to spy on American citizens, look a little deeper, and you might find out that “bipartisanship” can actually be pretty bad. #bailoutcaucus