The University Paper Manchester - October 2014 by The University Paper

MANCHESTER

A COPY OF DESTINY & A PS4:

OCTOBER 2014

FRESHERS EDITION THE BEST OF FRESHERS WEEK

PAGE 03

FIND OUT HOW ON PAGE 2

MAKE THE MOST OF YOUR NEW CITY

PAGES 03, 08-09, & 10-11

WELCOME to the best three years of your life MICHAEL O’CONNELL-DAVIDSON

A huge welcome to the 30,000 lucky freshers arriving in Manchester – and the other 60,000 returning students! For those new arrivals, forget the old debate about which is the UK’s second city - Mancunians know its London and prepare to spend three of the best and most important years of your life in the UK’s liveliest city. Welcome to the North. If you’re just arriving, then we’d also like to take this opportunity to introduce ourselves at the University Paper. We’re a different kind of student publication printing in 16 cities across the country, ranging all the way from Swansea to Sheffield -and beyond. Over the next academic year, we’ll be bringing you the best local news and entertainment Cardiff has to offer coupled with exclusive national content. To celebrate, we’re running a tongue-in-cheek analysis of the student cities we serve. Each has a population that’s as unique as its location, but how distinct are we talking? Here are some facts -- good and bad -- about each. Given that it’s the reason you’re here, the academic side of things is the most obvious starting point. Warwick University has never been ranked outside of the Top 10 UK major University rankings, and is the only University aside Oxford and Cambridge to have achieved this. However, the University of Edinburgh is the highest ranked University Paper university in the world, coming in at a hugely

impressive number 17. Estimates suggest there are over 16,000 institutions that provide higher education in the world, so if you’re an Edinburgh student, you can feel very smug indeed. Edinburgh also has the highest amount of money spent per student -- but it’s Glasgow that has the most satisfied students according to the National Student Survey, with 91% responding positively this year. A slightly dubious honour falls on the city of Glasgow, where the women of the city buy more fake tan than anybody else in the UK. Tesco also reported that Glasgow leads the way when it comes to buying extra-large condoms, in a league table that also included Manchester and Bristol. Admirably, the academic community in Bristol set themselves apart when the University of Bristol became the first University to admit male and female students onto taught degrees as equals. 15% of Sheffield Students are virgins, so if you’re a reader from Sheffield and you’ve yet to have experience your first time, you can take solace in the fact you’re not alone (or in Glasgow). Our most promiscuous city is Liverpool, where students at Liverpool Hope have had on average 6 partners since starting University in a similar survey. Depending on your perspective, this may be a point of shame or pride. I’ll leave it to you to pass

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 19

DON’T THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE AT UNIVERSITY DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDITS: SWNS.COM

UNIVERSITY IS A TIME for many things but getting stuck in a bin shouldn’t be one of them! Independence, responsibility and of course embarrassment are three buzz words that go hand in hand with one of the biggest steps in your life. This step provides the platform to produce the stories that will stick with, or in this case haunt, you forever. Some will shed in you in a good light,

for instance showing independence by looking after yourself in what is likely your ﬁrst time away from home. Other stories fall on the other side and cause embarrassment something this Manchester student knows a lot about. Robin Niven is the name currently on everyone’s lips, and like most embarrassing stories that happen during University years, he was on his way back from a

night out when the incident occurred. Yes, that’s right; he managed to get himself stuck in a bin and luckily for us all, his friends were there to record it. Many students will be able to tell you of countless stupid things they have done following a night out. Whether that be forgetting where you live when ordering a taxi (a common one) or getting on the wrong side of a drinking

W W W.UNIPA PER.CO.UK

game dare. However, very few, if any, will end up with the story concluding in someone being stuck in a bin. And even fewer will involve firemen. Yes - he really was that stuck. Robin had to be rescued by three fire fighters before his ordeal was finally over. The story all starts with a night out in Manchester.

» CONTINUED ON PAGE 19

WIN PS4

AND

DESTINY IF YOU HAVEN’T BEEN ABLE TO LAY YOUR HANDS ON A COPY DESTINY YET, THIS IS THE COMPETITION FOR YOU AS WE HAVE A COPY OF THE GAME AND A PLAYSTATION 4 UP FOR GRABS. IF YOU HAVE BEEN LIVING UNDER A ROCK THE PAST MONTH, DESTINY IS A NEW BLOCKBUSTER MYTHIC SCIENCE FICTION SHOOTER BY THE MAKERS OF HALO. IT BECAME THE WORLD’S MOST SUCCESSFUL NEW GAMING FRANCHISE AFTER IT SHIFTED $500 MILLION UNITS WITHIN JUST 24 HOURS OF ITS LAUNCH.

SO IF YOU FANCY BAGGING YOURSELF OVER £300 OF GAMING GEAR SIMPLY EMAIL YOUR NAME, UNIVERSITY AND YEAR OF STUDY TO WIN@UNIPAPER.CO.UK ENTRIES CLOSE OCTOBER 13TH GOOD LUCK!

FRESHERS GUIDE

SPECIAL

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

UNSPOKEN RULES OF UNIVERSITY KEISHA FRENCH

MAKING THE MOST OUT OF FIRST YEAR SAMANTHA MULDOON

PHOTO CREDIT: KEISHA FFRENCH

SEVEN SILENT COMMANDMENTS TO BECOME A SUCCESSFUL STUDENT

As a University student you’ll be bombarded by rules and regulations that are expected of you. There are some things, however, that have no written guidelines. Not to worry though, by following these seven unspoken commandments of student life you can be breezing through first year like a pro in no time. 1. THOU SHALT SIGN UP FOR LOTS OF SOCIETIES AT THE FRESHER’S FAIR... AND REGRET IT As an excited fresher you will be tempted to join every society that promises regular boozy socials. Come October (and after thousands of annoying Facebook updates) you’ll see sense and quietly remove yourself from the three hundred groups you joined. Let’s face it though; you were never interested in ice hockey or electronic dance music anyway. 2. THOU SHALT GO TO FACTORY 251 EVERY THURSDAY As a Manchester student, you will hear about Factory a lot (note: A LOT). When you’re broke with only a few quid to spare but desperate for a good night, Factory, with its one pound entry and ninety nine pence shots, will be the answer to your prayers. 3. THOU SHALT NOT HOOK UP WITH A FLATMATE Don’t even think about getting with that really fit flatmate with the nice accent. However if you do

(unfortunately) wake up to their dreadful snores, here’s what to do: sneak out, feign memory loss and never speak of it again. Ever. 4. THOU SHALT ASK BEFORE USING OTHER’S THINGS. Manners cost nothing. To avoid arguments always ask before you use your flatmates’ stuff. Should anything go missing, at least no-one will be pointing the finger at you. 5. THOU SHALT NOT SPEND ALL OF YOUR STUDENT LOAN AT ONCE Think Sainsbury’s, not Smirnoff. A grand might seem like a lot but you will be scrimping at pennies by the end of the month if you’re not careful. Spend wisely from the start and you’re sorted for the rest of the semester. 6. THOU SHALT TAKE YOUR STUDENT ID EVERYWHERE Student discounts are absolutely everywhere. Have your ID on you at all times and you’ll save yourself a fortune on lots of stuff you don’t actually need. 7. THOU SHALT NOT LEAVE AN ESSAY ‘TIL THE DAY BEFORE That first essay due in October might seem like an age away but the deadline will come around quicker than you can down a pint of fosters. Procrastinating will only cause stress and sleepless nights, so get to the library and get ahead of the game.

Welcome to student life, where late nights, drunkenness, scoffing supernoodles like they’re going out of fashion and watching too many DVD box sets is just a normal twenty four hours. However, here are some tips on how to really make the most of your first year, and become a fully-fledged ‘Manchester W****r’. Go wild at Warehouse Project You’re a Mancunion now, which means you must show an appreciation for all night raves and all things house and techno. You must also pay thirty pounds to prove it. Eat out… a lot Manchester’s Curry Mile isn’t

just home to the ‘is it actually a mile?’ debate, but also, you guessed it, curry. Pop into Shere Khan, take the obligatory ‘look we’re sitting in front of the awesome backdrop’ group photo and upload it to Facebook before grabbing some shisha on the way home. Don’t like curry? Sheffield has a nice university. Pretend you can ski SKUM (ski and snowboard club) is more famous for its socials than its trips away. It’s a great way to meet likeminded people who also haven’t done any sport since GCSE P.E - and get very drunk on the regular. Just remember: you love to ski. You’ve been doing it since you were little.

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FRESHERS GUIDE

SPECIAL

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

5 ‘M ice

AMY LOUISE TUR

MANCHESTER: Guide to the City OLIVER DURNER

PHOTO CREDIT: OLIVER DURNER

FALLOWFIELD

Home to the majority of the city’s University accommodation, Fallowfield provides a selfcontained student haven located just 15 minutes from Manchester city centre. Fallowfield’s historically student dominated population is reflected by the area’s abundance of cheap fast food shops and reasonably priced cocktail bars like The Font, providing the opportunity for a great night out without ever having to leave Fallowfield.

Food lovers are catered to by a wide variety of independent eateries such as Fallow Café and Fuzion, while restaurants such as Sanskruti offer vegetarian and vegan takes on traditional Indian dishes. If you find yourself living in Fallowfield during your first year, you won’t be disappointed.

DEANSGATE

Deansgate is home to some of Manchester’s finest upmarket clubs, pubs and cocktail bars. However be prepared to dig

deep into your student loan, as Deansgate’s sophisticated twist on Northern nightlife does not come cheap. You will find that clubs like Sakura offer luxuries such as table service and private VIP booths (at a cost), and that customer service is second to none. Be cautious however, as drinks prices and entry fees in Deansgate can be hefty. Deansgate is not all nightlife however, and is home to historic buildings like the John Rylands Library, a beautiful neo-gothic

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building which students at the University of Manchester will come to be familiar with. Deansgate offers a wide selection of fine restaurants and quality clothing retailers, providing a welcome break from most typical student areas for those looking to splash the cash.

NORTHERN QUARTER

Manchester’s Northern Quarter is well regarded in the north-west as the mecca

of all things hip and quirky. Appropriately located just north of the city centre, the Northern Quarter offers a raft of independent coffee shops, bars, record outlets and clothing retailers. A day can easily be spent navigating the Northern Quarter’s beautiful graffiti-lined streets – see if you can spot the Banksy - and vast array of vintage clothing outfitters, most of which are housed in Affleck’s palace, an alternative shopping centre located in the heart of

Northern Quarter. Eateries such as the strictly vegetarian Earth cafe cater to Manchester’s dietary niches, and the world famous Piccadilly Records is a must-see for any true vinyl fanatic. By night the Northern Quarter’s bars and clubs open their doors to students to host some of the most popular nights of the city, with venues such as Soup Kitchen and The Roadhouse holding weekly nights that simply mustn’t be missed.

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

5 ‘Moving In’ ice-breakers AMY LOUISE TURNER

BREWS: Let’s face it, this is a guaranteed conversation starter. Nothing gets a Brit excited like the mere mention of tea, and we’ll all feel a little more comfortable with a cuppa in hand. GET COOKING: Pass on those ready meals. Stay away from those Rustlers burgers (this is just good advice in general). Gather all your soon-to-be mates around the stove, and cook up a communal meal! Everyone gets something to do, and you can even take turns standing making sarcastic comments, à la Come Dine With Me.

. Eateries y vegetarian o Manchester’s BEER PONG: d the world Records is y true vinyl the Northern d clubs open dents to host popular nights enues such as The Roadhouse ghts that e missed.

Ok, hear me out on this one. It may seem a little bit lowbrow and ‘fratboyish’, but scratch the surface, and you’ll find a surefire method for getting to know your new flatmates. The strongest friendships of all are formed on the battlefield, and nothing signals the beginning of an iron-clad friendship like teaming up with your new roomies to sink ball after ball into the cups of ‘them from down the hallway’. MARIO KART TOURNAMENT: Seriously, who doesn’t enjoy Mario Kart? If you’ve got a Nintendo Wii, prepare to be the most popular person in your flat/floor/house in no time.

BEGINNERS GUIDE TO BECOMING A BNOC JOANNA HARRIS

PHOTO CREDIT: JOANNA HARRIS

Achieving BNOC (Big Name on Campus) status is no easy feat in Manchester. It is a quest certainly not for the faint-hearted. There are many things the aspiring BNOC must take into consideration, and it can seem like an overwhelming task at times. However, the core characteristics of every Manchester BNOC are undoubtedly similar, so here are some beginner’s tips to get you started.

BECOME A DJ…

…or at least show a burning passion for the deepest of house and most minimal of techno. If your musical knowledge is lacking, a t-shirt emblazoned with ‘DEEP’ will suﬃce, whilst you learn the basics. Recite the Warehouse line-up like a nursery rhyme. And remember: headphones-as-necklace is a timeless accessory for the BNOC.

PARTY OFTEN, BUT NOT TOO HARD (A BNOC MUST ALWAYS REMAIN PRESENTABLE)

Ensure you are tagged in as many club photos as possible. Pursue the photographer like a lion hunting its prey. The ideal picture will include drink-in-hand, peace sign and plenty of “pals” around you (it doesn’t matter if they are strangers).

JOIN A SOCIETY – AND MAKE SURE YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF FACEBOOK PROMOTION

For Facebook promotion, read selfpromotion: you need people to remember that name. Become a member of every group with ‘University of Manchester’ in the title. Begin every post with a sickeningly cheerful, “Hi guys!” Invade every homepage. No one escapes the BNOC.

LEARN THE LINGO

Many people think the words ‘sick’, ‘unbelievable’ and ‘mate’ can be overused. These people are not BNOCs.

FINALLY, RUN FOR PRESIDENT… OF ANYTHING A BNOC must have their minions. The position you run for must require handing out copious amounts of beautifully hand-crafted ﬂyers, each with a witty caption and a huge picture of your face on it. Note: HUGE. Follow these ﬁve handy hints and you are well on your way to becoming the coolest cat on campus. Good luck!

FOOD

THE GRADUATE. A pub t the biggest plate of nachos ever seen and it’s close to H City Campus. You can finis over lunch or grab a pint at the day.

THE STREET FOOD CHE outlets selling freshly mad food under £5, this place h a loyal following. You’ll fin chatting over a quesadilla a attempting the 3.5lb burrit competition.

FLURT. This hidden gem

COMMENT FRESHERS

GUIDE

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

SPECIAL

We confront the issues that ma er to you, right here on campus. Have an opinion? Contact us at: editor@unipaper.co.uk to have your say

THE BIG QUESTION

Alcohol-Free Freshers Week: Is it doable? EMILY BOURNE

PHOTO CREDIT: ALISSA WHALES

AS THE INFAMOUS FRESHER’S WEEK For non-drinkers, or for those who simply want to remember the week, Fresher’s can be tricky, but it can be done. Chances are people will be getting drunk so fast they won’t even notice or care that you’ve just ordered a Jagerbomb without the Jager. However it’s best to avoid any kind of table area which could be used for beer pong.

Pushy promoters need to back oﬀ JENNY STERNE

While part-time jobs are getting harder to find and the cost of student life goes up, nightclub promotion remains an easy way to make some quick cash. As minions from different club nights swarm our campuses in an attempt to outdo each other, a ceaseless advertising battle is created. Halls of Residence are often a prime target pushy promoters. After wading, knee-deep, through the dozens of leaflets shoved under your door from the day before, you’re almost certain to run into a shifty looking guy wearing his personality on his face in the form of shutter shades, holding a stack of what look suspiciously like even more leaflets. Sigh. ‘You off out tonight love?’ is the pushy promoter’s usual greeting. Whatever your response, you can be sure they have an answer pre-planned. They promise discounted entry if you get there before midnight - good luck with that - or tempt you with mythical ‘early bird’ tickets which are ‘selling out fast’. Of course they’re selling fast – there’s only ever five of them. However, it’s not just halls that are being targeted. Promoters can be found prowling any Facebook page with ‘University of Manchester’, ‘MMU’ or ‘Salford University’ in the title. When they’re not spamming you with their ‘one off fantastic deals’, they turn their dirty tactics to adding new students en masse and bombarding them with automatic weekly invites for the next three years.

APPRECIATE THE MADNESS By ditching the alcohol, you’re going to (actually want to) remember your fresher’s week. Memory loss is included in the small print of any vodka bottle, so appreciate the bad dancing, awful remixes and crap pick-up lines, safe in the knowledge that you’ll remember it all in the morning. AVOID THE EMBARRASSMENT ‘The Drunk’ is a wondrous being, capable of many indignities such as channelling Rick Astley on the dance floor, hitting on those hopelessly out of their league, and declaring eternal love for complete strangers. Spare yourself the embarrassment but revel in the pleasure of holding this over your flatmates’ heads for the next nine months. DITCH THE HANGOVER Waking up without throwing up is a blessing reserved only for the teetotal fresher. With your immune system intact, you will watch on as those around you scramble to the loo every ten minutes, devour their bodyweight in pizzas and oven chips and develop the (otherwise) unavoidable fresher’s flu.

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SPECIAL

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Indepth, Insightful, & uncompromising: Interviews with BITE

TO BE FRANK The phrase ‘hardest-working man in show business’ is overused. And more than that, it’s an impossible thing to measure. But, if there was a league table, you can bet Frank Turner would be up there. The folk-punk singer has been touring in one shape or another for the past 16 years, whether as part of his short-lived “terrible” school band Kneejerk, the much-missed post-punk band Million Dead or as a solo artist. He’s heading out on the road again in September, his second UK tour this year. This time, however, there are a few differences. Firstly, the venues Turner and his band, The Sleeping Souls, are performing in are off the beaten path. It’s a nod to the fact Turner, after being born in Bahrain, grew up close to Winchester in the Hampshire village of Meonstoke, and bands very rarely, if ever, came to play nearby. “It’s also a nod of respect to people who like my music,” he says. “I am aware not everyone lives in London, Glasgow, Manchester and Birmingham. And people are so entitled these days. As soon as we announced these gigs, people in the cities were saying, ‘There’s nowhere near me’, so I say ‘Yes there is, there’s this place, which is 15 minutes on the train’. Those guys in the sticks have to travel all the time. “Plus, as well as keeping fans on their toes, it’s more interesting for me and my crew to go to new places, too.” The other reason Turner’s forthcoming run of shows will be different is that rather than promoting an album - his fifth album Tape Deck Heartcame out last year - he and the band are going to be playing all-new songs in preparation for recording their sixth. “We’re going into the studio in October,” he explains. “I’ve long had the feeling I’m yet to make a record that captures what we sound like live. You can think about methodology and studio craft all you want, but why not just go into the studio on the back of a tour when we’re sounding great? “And I’ve got way too many songs for an album - 19 at last count - so we’re going to play lots of them, and we will work out what to put on the record from that. Not that I’m going to be saying, ‘That went down well, let’s put it on the record’, but I’ll get a good idea from crowd reaction and from playing the songs each night.” His next album, he expects, will be released at the end of February, and will feature one song called Love Forty Down, a metaphor for being in your Thirties and being “rubbish at relationships”, inspired by hearing some friends playing table tennis one night. Another is called Get Better, which shares a title with a song by his friends Dan Le Sac Vs Scroobius Pip. “I rang Pip to ask if it was OK to share the title and not only did he say yes, but he offered to remix the song for us as well.” There’s not much sign of this workload stopping. Despite 2014 seeing him play all over the world, Turner’s team are currently booking shows, provisionally at least, for 2016. “I live a life that revolves around album cycles, and those shows are definitely written in pencil rather than pen, but yeah, it’s all being planned.

“It’s more interesting for me and my crew to go to new places, too.”

And I wouldn’t have it any other way.” After a summer of playing festivals all over Europe, he’s particularly excited to get back to playing his own shows, while this summer marked the point where he’d been touring for more than half his life. “I did my first tour in 1998, which was 16 years ago, and now I’m 32, so yeah, half my life on the road. I think we celebrated with another gig, which seemed about right.” Turner was born in Muharraq in Bahrain. His father was a banker and was on a posting to the Middle East in the early Eighties, and Turner lived there for the first six months of his life. “The main impact that it has on my life is that the place of birth on my passport is Muharraq. Try getting into the US with Muharraq written on your passport,” he says. His grandfather, Sir Mark Turner, was once chairman of high street chain BHS, while his father, Roger, worked in investment banking, and his mum Jane is a primary school headteacher. The life of a travelling folk singer perhaps seems unlikely for a former Eton pupil (Turner studied alongside Prince William at the elite school), and much has been made in the past of his background and political beliefs. Turner describes himself as a “classic liberal” in line with many modern libertarians, and has beliefs based on “democracy, individuality, equality of opportunity, distrust of power and, above all else, freedom, including economic freedom”. He has ‘Freeborn’ tattooed on his knuckles, as well as the ama-gi Sumerian cuneiform on his arm, the first written reference to the word ‘Freedom’ found in southern Mesopotamia, now modern Iraq, although as he gets older, he says he’s less inclined to share his politics at all. For now, at least, he’s concerning himself with his music - “The only thing I’m really interested in” - and preparations for album six. “I have a title but I can’t tell you what it is,” he says, though he will reveal it’ll be an upbeat collection, after the break-up confessional of Tape Deck Heart. “I want it to be shorter, too. We did a deluxe album for the last one, which seems confused to me in retrospect,” Turner adds. “I want the next one to be a 12-track album - simple and direct.”

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

WHAT’S ON

The BEST night’s this Fresher’s week & throughout the month

THIS MONTH MONDAY 22ND SEPTEMBER

● Mega Monday @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Northern Soul Dance School @ NIGHT AND DAY ● Quo Vadis /Soulride/ Ashborn @ REBELLION ROCKBAR ● Manchester Food and Drink Festival @ ALBERT SQUARE ● Maholo Monday @ HULU TIKI BAR TUESDAY 23RD SEPTEMBER

● South @STUDENT HOUSE ● Baa Bar @FRAT PARTY ● Break the rules @REVOLUTION, OXFORD ROAD ● Angel Olsen @ GORILLA ● Gold Teeth @ DEAF INSTITUTE WEDNESDAY 24TH SEPTEMBER

● South @LORD OF THE TINGS ● Oxford Comedy Nights @OXFORD HOTEL ● Bubble Football @SALFORD UNIVERSITY ● An evening with Andy Carins @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD, #Social Wednesdays THURSDAY 25TH SEPTEMBER

● Ms Lauren Hill @ALBERT HALL ● F/Ck Thursdays @ FACTORY ● Murkage @ SOUTH ● Rip It Up @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Déjà vu Thursdays @ ENTOURAGE FRIDAY 26TH SEPTEMBER

● Tribal Sessions @SANKEYS ● Deadbolt @SOUND CONTROL ● Jungle Citizens @THEZOO ● Fri 251 @ FACTORY ● Cocktails and Acoustics @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD

TUESDAY 30TH SEPTEMBER

● SBTRKT @ALBERT HALL ● Made in Manchester @ 256 ● Frat Party @BAA BAR ● Break the Rules @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Good Teeth @DEAF INSTITUTE WEDNESDAY 1ST OCTOBER

● The Big Cheese Tour @ DEAF INSTITUTE ● Bass Face @SOUND CONTROL ● Blow @BLACKDOG NWS ● Juicy @JOSHUA BROOKS THURSDAY 2ND OCTOBER

● Fac251 @FACTORY ● Déjà vu @ENTOURAGE ● Blue Cat @STOCKPORT ● Squids! @PUB ZOO ● Rip It Up @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD FRIDAY 3RD OCTOBER

● Avi Buffalo @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Cocktails and Acoustic @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Tribal Sessions @SANKEYS ● Twist and Shout @THE VENUE ● Warehouse Project @STORE STREET SATURDAY 4TH OCTOBER

● Lowdown @SOUND CONTROL ● Dub Trilogies @THE ZOO ● Take Back the Night @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Ministry Of Sound @STATIC ● Fac251 @FACTORY SUNDAY 5TH OCTOBER

● Strand of Oaks @ DEAF INSTITUTE ● Natalie Holmes @SOUND CONTROL ● Comedy Night @ SQUIRRELS

● Amine edge and dance @SANKEYS ● Rubix Cube @ ANTWERP MANSION ● Woman’s Hour @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Baa Quiz @ BAA BAR ● Take Back the Night @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD

MONDAY 6TH OCTOBER ● Open Mic @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Mega Monday @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Dub Club @ANTWERP MANSION ● Remake Remodel @SOUP KITCHEN ● Student Night @TIGER TIGER

SUNDAY 28TH SEPTEMBER

TUESDAY 7TH OCTOBER

SATURDAY 27TH SEPTEMBER

● Comedy Night @FROG AND COMEDY CLUB ● Wizkid @THE RITZ ● Jason Mraz @THE LOWRY ● The Fray @MANCHESTER ACADEMY ● Acoustic Sunday @REBELLION ROCK BAR

● Gold Teeth @ DEAF INSTITUTE ● Break the Rules @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Koos Tuesdays @ TIGER TIGER● Tuesday Live! @LOCK91 ● Frat Party @ BAA BAR

● Jungle Brothers @ BAND ON THE WALL ● All Tomorrow Parties @ MANCHESTER ACADEMY ● Mega Monday @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Open Mic @PUB ZOO ● Michael Palin @OPERA HOUSE

● Disco Rescue @SOUTH ● Big Weekender @FACTORY

FRIDAY 10TH OCTOBER

SUNDAY 19TH OCTOBER

SATURDAY 11TH OCTOBER

MONDAY 20TH OCTOBER

● Cocktails and Acoustic @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Hip Hop @REVOLUTION, FALLOWFIELD ● Metric ● @ SOUNDCONTROL ● TOTP @ MINT LOUNGE ● Tribal Sessions @SANKEYS

● Hacienda ft. Happy Mondays @ALBERT HALL ● Take Back the Night @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Relapse @SOUND CONTROL ● Cloud Boat @ SUPER KITCHEN SUNDAY 12TH OCTOBER

● Open Mic @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Acoustic Sunday @REBELLION ROCK BAR ● Billy does Baa Bar @BAA BAR MONDAY 13TH OCTOBER

● Remake Model @SOUP KITCHEN ● Mega Monday @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Open Mic @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Maholo Monday @ HULU TIKI BAR ● Hamlet @ROYAL EXCHANGE TUESDAY 14TH OCTOBER

● Gold Teeth @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Koos Tuesday @TIGER TIGER ● Magnum @JOSHUA BROOKES ● Break The Rules @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Frat Party @BAA BAR WEDNESDAY 15TH OCTOBER

● Only 161 @ARK, MANCHESTER ● Bass Face @SOUND CONTROL ● Blow @BLACKDOGS NWS ● I Love NYC @FACTORY WEDNESDAYS ● #Social Wednesdays @Revolution, Oxford Road at Party THURSDAY 16TH OCTOBER

● Altrego Thursdays @ ARK(MISSOULA) ● Déjà vu Thursdays @ENTOURAGE ● F##k Thursdays @FAC251 ● Murkage @SOUTH ● Rip It Up @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD FRIDAY 17TH OCTOBER

● Bass Face @ SOUND CONTROL ● Juicy @ JOSHUA BROOKES ● I Love NYC @FACTORY ● Uproar Wednesdays @THE VENUE

● Cherry -2nd Birthdays @ SOUND CONTROL ● Coded Rhythm @GORILLA ● Cocktail and Acoustic @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Electric Jug @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Submerged @ SOUTH

THURSDAY 9TH OCTOBER

SATURDAY 18TH OCTOBER

WEDNESDAY 8TH OCTOBER MONDAY 29TH SEPTEMBER

LOLA LO ● F##k Thursday @ FACTORY

● Rip It Up @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Déjà vu @ ENTOURAGE ● Murkage @ SOUTH ● Pinup Thursdays @

● Take back the night @ REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● Covert Events @SANKEYS ● Bipolar Sunshine @RITZ

● Top 100 DJ’ party @ VICTORIA WAREHOUSE ● Open Mic @PUB ZOO ● We are the Ocean @ MANCHESTER ACADEMY ● The Hold steady @ MANCHESTER ACADEMY

● Open Mic @DEAF INSTITUTE ● Mega Monday @REVOLUTION, OXFORD RD ● John Newman @ APOLLO ● George Ezra @ RITZ ● Remake Role model @SOUP KITCHEN

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

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Top Student Nights out in Manchester KEISHA FFRENCH

Manchester has some of the best nightlife in the UK, with a constantly evolving club scene. Always with you, though, is the trusty ‘student night’. With most of them just £5 advance or less - with great drinks offers – and guaranteed to be packed with students, you can’t go wrong:

FACTORY 251 (PRINCESS ST) One of Manchester’s most popular student nightclubs, Factory is always a big night out. Bringing the very best in indie, dance, r&b, hip hop and house music, it’s no wonder Factory is popular. For a night out under a fiver, try F//CK Thursdays (99p entry before midnight) – just get down early to beat the queues.

5TH AVENUE (PRINCESS ST) 5th Ave is pure marmite. However, if you can stomach paying for the smoking area (yes), it’s a good place to start whilst you’re still finding your feet in Manchester. For fans of indie music, Monday Madness, Propaganda (Wednesdays) or Bounce (Thursdays) will all have you screaming The Smiths on the bus home.

SANKEY’S (BEEHIVE MILL) One of Manchester most famous nightclubs, Sankey’s is a rite of passage for all Freshers and a shrine to the best in house and techno. Their cheap student night After Dark, every Monday, is massively popular and tickets sell fast. However you can only buy tickets for this event online in advance, so be sure to check out their Facebook page for more info.

SOUND CONTROL (NEW WAKEFIELD ST) Located just off Oxford road, Sound Control is a 3 storey club that puts on a wide range of live events and club nights. They host one of Manchester’s best known nights, BassFace (Wednesdays), which gives you 3 clubs for the price of one! Venture upstairs for all the chart toppers or head to the basement for the latest in house, tech and bass.

TIGER TIGER (THE PRINTWORKS)

2-4-1 selected cocktails stoli vodka &mixer £2.50 AMSTEL DRAUGHT £2.50 sHARING PITCHER £12 HOOCH £2.50 PISTON HEAD £2.50 SIX SHOT STICK £8 2-4-1 PIZZAS & HOT DOGS 50% OFF FOOD WEDNESDAYS*

90-94 Oxford Road Manchester TEL: 0161 236 7470

VALID ANYTIME EXCEPT AFTER 9PM SATURDAY See r evolution - bar s.co.u k / tan dc s for fu ll ter ms an d con ditions *£ 2 su pplem ent for ste ak s. Offer s may vary depen dant on site .

Grab your

Only

Located in the Printworks, Tiger Tiger puts on huge nights, attracting punters from all over the north west – and freshers is no exception. Their fresher’s closing party The Super Big One (Sunday 21st) attracts 5000 students across multiple venues, every year. But if you go - prepare to be squashed! Although many do have a good night out in Tiger Tiger, the night mainly consists of a huge queue, and then once inside, people pushing each other around to get to nowhere in particular. You have been warned.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

11 Need a little something to spice up your pre-party? Check out Mindbenders

Âť MINDBENDERS ON PAGE 28

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

BY PHIL HAMILTON

PICTURES: BANG SHOWBIZ AGENCY

KIM’S KRYING GAME KIM KARDASHIAN WEST was reduced to tears when she had to babysit her sister’s kids. The 33-year-old star agreed to look after her older sibling Kourtney’s two children, Mason, four, and Penelope, two, while also caring for her own 14-monthold daughter North - her child with husband Kanye West. Kim admits she struggled to care for all three kids and was “crying” at the end of the day when she finally got them all in bed. During an appearance on ‘The Ellen DeGeneres Show’ - which aired on September 9th - she revealed: “I just went to San Diego to give my pregnant sister a break. “I took care of my niece, nephew, and my daughter. To bathe them - all three - feed them, get them in their pyjamas and down for bed, I was literally crying!” Kim added: “It was so hard, three kids. I don’t know how my mom did it with six.” Kim’s emotional babysitting experience has made her think twice about her previous wish to have a large family. She admitted: “I’ll go for two, but then again I have so many siblings and I love it, they’re my best friends and I would love that for my kids. So I’m going to do two and see how it goes. I don’t think [I’d have] six, but maybe three or four - I go back and forth.” As well as Kim and Kourtney their mother Kris Jenner also has son Rob and daughter Khloe from her marriage to their late father Robert Kardashian and daughters Kendall Jenner and Kylie Jenner from her relationship with estranged husband Bruce Jenner.

Never, ever, ever... GETTING A DATE?

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A LITTLE OFF THE TOP?

Anyone who visits the TONI & GUY ACADEMY for a cut or colour appointment will automatically be added into their model database, where they will be eligible for heavily discounted or complimentary styling and technical appointments at various times throughout the year. In addition to its daily offer of £12.00 haircuts and colour appointments for £15.00 to £30.00, for both men and women, TONI & GUY

dels to have a skin test beforehand.

ACADEMY also runs special MENS and CREATIVE COURSES throughout the year and are always on the lookout for models. Toni & Guy is a longstanding sponsor of London Fashion Week and all cut and colour sessions are supervised by members of the TONI&GUY Art Team.

TAYLOR SWIFT has not been on a date since she split from Harry Styles. The ‘Trouble’ singer has been involved in numerous high-profile relationships since breaking into the pop industry, including romances with Joe Jonas, John Mayer and Jake Gyllenhaal, but Swift, 24, says she’s not seen anybody since she split from Harry of One Direction. Speaking to Rolling Stone magazine, she explained: “[I] have not gone on a date. People are going to feel sorry for me when you write that. But it’s true.” Taylor says that one reason why she has consciously avoided dating was because she felt that she was making

too many headlines for that reason. She explained: “I’m just not comfortable providing that kind of entertainment anymore. I don’t like seeing slide shows of guys I’ve apparently dated. “I don’t like giving comedians the opportunity to make jokes about me at awards shows. I don’t like it when headlines read ‘Careful, Bro, She’ll Write a Song About You,’ because it trivializes my work.” The ‘Love Story’ hitmaker added: “And most of all, I don’t like how all these factors add up to build the pressure so high in a new relationship that it gets snuffed out before it even has a chance to start.”

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

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BELIEBING ‘This Is How I Do’ IN BETTER BEHAVIOUR Katy Perry is planning to write a tell-all book. The ‘This Is How We Do’ hitmaker has reportedly been oﬀered a number of multi-million dollar book deals from American publishers who are convinced her story will be a worldwide hit.

IN ADDITION to the breakdown of her marriage to Russell Brand - whom she split from in 2011, 14 months after they tied the knot - they’re also hoping she’ll spill the beans on her other high profile relationships with John Mayer and Gym Class Heroes star Travie McCoy. They also believe stories about her childhood would make for great reading as the queen of pop was brought up in a strict Christian family and was initially trying to make it as a gospel singer before becoming a household name with hits such as ‘I Kissed A Girl’ and ‘California Gurls’. A source said: “Her story and relationships are fascinating to many people in America, from her pop fans, Christian groups and star-loving book readers.”

Katy is reported to have been worried that Russell was going to open up about their sex life in a book of his own after he refused to agree to a gagging order in their divorce papers. However, he’s now shelved plans for a third instalment of his ‘My Booky Wook’ autobiography series. A source told the Daily Mirror newspaper: “Katy thought that Russell was going to tell all about what they got up to in the bedroom ... However, now the boot is on the other foot because Katy is being offered deals to come out and present her version of events. “She wasn’t very kind to Russell when she spoke about him after the split and with her star at such a meteoric height, publishers expect her to be a best seller.”

JUSTIN BIEBER is reportedly seeing a therapist. The 20-year-old singer is allegedly seeing a £600-an-hour Los Angeles shrink, John Kenyon, to help control his impulsive behaviour following multiple run ins with the law - which left him facing charges of assault and drag racing - earlier this year. A source told The Daily Star newspaper: “Kenyon’s treating Justin in person, when possible, then over Skype when he’s away. Sometimes they even have more than one session a day.” Despite the sought-after therapist’s hectic schedule, the ‘Boyfriend’ hitmaker used his celebrity status to skip a lengthy waiting list of patients and is said to be enjoying the sessions. The source added: “Kenyon’s so booked up he doesn’t normally take on new

clients but Justin used his name to skip the three-year waiting list. “It’s too soon to tell if it’s having a positive eﬀect , but the fact that Justin has kept it up and passed the ﬁrst batch of sessions speaks volumes. “If he hates something he’s not normally the kind of person to stick it out.” It is thought Justin was encouraged to participate in the sessions by his mother Pattie Mallette, 39, who has become increasingly worried that his erratic behaviour will be damaging to his career. The source explained: “His mum Pattie suggested he should give it a go. “She’s constantly worried he’ll do something that will ruin everything he’s worked for. And he adores his mum so he agreed to do it for her.”

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MUSIC

PARTY ANIMAL? ALWAYS OUT AND ABOUT? Did you catch up with our snappers. Check out pages 10 and 11 to see if you made the cut.

R.I.P FRANKIE REVIEWS KNUCKLES THE PASSING of Frankie Knuckles earlier this year marked an end of an era for house music. In April, musos mourned as the unexpected death of Frankie Knuckles hit the headlines. Frankie dubbed “The godfather of house music” died at his home in Chicago aged 59 following complications to Type II diabetes. Despite his career being cut short he leaves behind a musical legacy that will have generations to come cutting shapes. The Grammy-winning DJ and producer started his career in the early 1970‘s as a disco DJ at The Warehouse in Chicago. It was his experimental style that would later become known as house, a genre which would inspire dance acts such as Daft Punk to take to the decks. Frankie’s career went from strength to strength, with chart topping tracks such as “Your Love” and “The Whistle Song”. He also began produce records for the likes of Madonna, Whitney Houston and Depeche Mode. In 2004, then Illinois state senator, Barack Obama dubbed August 25th Frankie Knuckles Day and re-named the street where the Warehouse once stood, Frankie Knuckles Way. In 2005, he was inducted into the Dance Music Hall of Fame. However three years later, he developed diabetes which would lead to having his foot amputated. But this didn’t stop Frankie, who played gigs right up until two days before his death. But what made Knuckles stand apart from the rest was that he understood how to make it happen on the dance floor, sometimes referred to as the “priest of the dancefloor”. Only time will tell who will step up to the decks next.

ALBUM REVIEW

NEW EYES CLEAN BANDIT

2014 has been the year of Clean Bandit! After having the UK’s fastest-selling single of 2014 so far with their chart-topping anthem “Rather Be”, they also completed a hugely successful UK tour and a massively varied festival season across the UK and around the world. Their new album New Eyes has a multitude of tunes such as “Mozart’s House”, “Extraordinary”, “Come Over”, “A&E” and “Heart on Fire” and with their signature mix of classical music and garage pop they have managed to hit new heights with their album. ‘Extraordinary’ is a excellently executed mix of percussion beats, while ‘Mozart’s House’ manages to take a sample of the composer’s String Quartet No. 21 and then magically turns it into an impressive house rave within seconds and newly released single ‘Come Over’ was one of the biggest

hits of summer 2014. The album manages to layer classical music over beats and at the same time incorporates many different textures and influences across the 13-track album and their decision to collaborate with largely unknown artists had added more flare to the album, than cashing in which in turn turns the album in to a massively successful varied collection. However, even though the album is mostly successful in its approach, they do have a few tracks that closely touch on annoying. The repetitive hook of ‘Telephone Banking’ slips into annoying half way through and even the album named track ‘New Eyes’ is too long-winded.

RATING: 5/5

THE ROUND UP: To Me, Her Hips Don’t Lie SHAKIRA IS expecting another son. The ‘She Wolf’ singer announced last month she is pregnant with her second child with soccer star Gerard Piqué. Now Shakira’s mother Nidia and father William have revealed she is carrying a brother for her 19-month-old son Milan. Her parents told Hola! magazine: “We’re very happy. She’s having another baby boy - a playmate for Milan.” Although they now the sex of their next grandchild, Nidia and William do not know what Shakira and Gerard plan to call their next baby. They added: “We don’t know anything about names yet.” Shakira confirmed the happy news in a magazine interview and on her Twitter page telling her millions of followers: “Yes, we are expecting our second baby!! Thank you all for your well wishes!” Shakira, 37, has previously stated she’d like to have a huge family with Gerard, 27, with her dream being to have enough kids for her

own soccer side. She previously said: “If it weren’t because of my music projects, I would be pregnant already. I would love to have eight or nine kids

To You

WILL YOUNG has started selling his old clothes online. The ‘Jealousy’ singer has launched an online fashion website with friends, selling old items of clothing alongside a selection of new items. Despite his estimated £12.5 million fortune, the 35-year-old star has been clearing out his wardrobe to get rid of his unwanted items on the virtual retailer, My Vintage Journey. He tweeted: “My website http://myvintagejourney.com is live!!!! Hats in all colours, vintage and 2nd hand clothes and bits and pieces! More stuff to come (sic)” Fans of the singer - who won the inaugural series of the ITV singing competition ‘Pop Idol’ in 2002 - can purchase a variety of items from vintage waistcoats to Alexander McQueen high top sneakers, with several items previously being owned by the ‘Leave Right Now’ crooner. Will informed his 191,000 followers on Twitter that the most popular items are, in

fact, not his unwanted garments, but knitted beanie hats which are being sold on the site for £15 each. The website features a handwritten ‘About Us’ page which reads: “Here our team finds treasures. Treasures to wear, treasures to look at, treasures to give and/or keep for yourself! “Our aim is to focus on quality. Found clothes, accessories and little gems are our passion. We all have day to day jobs and we all come together to discover stuff we want to pass on to you.”

READY FOR THE weEKEND?

We sit down with the fabulous Frankie Bridge of The Saturdays ahead of their Greatest Hits Tour WHAT ARE THE REASONS BEHIND HAVING A GREATEST HITS TOUR NOW AND NOT AT THE END OF YOUR CAREER?

nages to layer We have just released our greatest hits album as we thought it would be good to have all our singles e same time s and influenc-so far on just one album. The tour follows that as eir decision to all the fans should know the words to the songs tists had added and we thought it would be a really enjoyable ng in which in experience for us all. ely successful

is mostly suce a few tracks repetitive nto annoying m named track

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

WHEN YOU STARTED YOUR JOURNEY IN THE MUSIC WORLD DID YOU THINK YOU WOULD BE DOING SOMETHING LIKE THIS SEVEN YEARS DOWN THE LINE?

No, definitely not. I don’t think we ever thought we would have that many singles and definitely not enough to make a greatest hits album so it is a great achievement for us as a group.

WAS IT HARD TO PICK THE TRACKS THAT MADE UP YOUR GREATEST HITS ALBUM? No it wasn’t hard at all as this tour and album were planned at the right time so we could fit all our singles on so we didn’t have to pick and choose. There are also three new songs on there to provide a little treat to the fans.

WHAT HAVE BEEN YOUR FAVOURITE MOMENTS OF YOUR CAREER TO DATE? Getting to perform at Wembley was a big moment for all of us as we all grew up in London so that was a special moment. On top of that, getting to do the Comic Relief single was a great achievement for us because so many massive artists have done it before us.

IF YOU COULD GO BACK AND CHANGE ANYTHING FROM OVER YOUR CAREER WHAT WOULD IT BE? We have had some awful outfits! When you look back and think ‘what was I thinking’ with some of the clothes we wore but I guess it is all part of growing up and it gives everyone else a chance for a little laugh.

CAN YOU PUT INTO WORDS WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE COME THIS FAR AND TO HAVE SOLD OVER FIVE MILLION RECORDS AND HAD FOUR TOP TEN ALBUMS? No, not really! We have surpassed anything we could ever have managed to achieve and it is weird looking back and seeing how much has changed over seven years. We have achieved so much, when it’s actually happening you don’t realise what you are doing. With the Greatest Hits album coming out we have been able to look back and really take in what we have done.

WE KNOW THIS ISN’T THE END FOR THE SATURDAYS, BUT IF YOU COULD LOOK FURTHER AHEAD WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL BE THE FINISHING GOAL FOR THE GROUP? We want to keep going as long as possible especially whilst we are still enjoying it which we are at the moment. Everyone still gets on really well and we have still managed to get to do everything as a band as well as individually. There is no real end in sight at the moment.

WHICH CITIES DO YOU LOVE PLAYING THE MOST? We have found the further North you go the louder everyone gets and that is always really fun. The good thing about going on tour is you never really know what you are going to get. We are doing the same show every night but it does change as the crowds are different and are up for it in different ways.

WHEN YOU BEGAN YOUR MUSIC CAREERS DID YOU DO ANY UNIVERSITY GIGS? We did tons of University gigs all the time when we were starting out. They were always really good as they all came throughout Fresher weeks which were a good laugh as everyone was drunk and really enjoying themselves.

WHO WOULD BE THE DREAM BAND/ARTIST TO COLLABORATE WITH? It would have been wicked to do something with the Spice Girls back in the day just because as girls growing up they were who we idolised.

ANY PLANS TO RETURN TO THE UNITED STATES AFTER ACHIEVING WHAT YOU DID WHEN YOU WERE OVER THERE LAST YEAR? There are no current plans to return there anytime soon due to a number of reasons. We have three children, husbands and long term boyfriends throughout the group and we are real home girls as well. We really like being in England, we might go back to the US because we enjoyed every minute of it whilst we were over there, but we plan on spending more time here now.

WHAT’S THE FUNNIEST STORY YOU HAVE FROM YOUR TIME TOURING THE WORLD? Me and Rochelle dressed up as a horse once and went and mingled in the audience before our show started one night. We took photos with fans which was a good laugh for us as none of them realised it was us two in the costume.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

TECHNOLOGIC PHIL HAMILTON

TECHNOLOGY EDITOR

GADGETS This month: PHONES WE ALL KNOW Apple are a bunch of B******ds when it comes to putting out iPhone upgrades every five minutes to iScrew our bank accounts. We’re now on iPhone model 246S, and despite a battery life that can only be described as S***, Apple have been the world champion of smartphones for years... But since Steve Jobs popped off to tech heaven a lot of other contenders have sprung up ready take the iPhone’s title. So who could become the new champ? Phil ‘The Hammer’ Hamilton is stepping in the ring to bash about the

best of the rest to see which can batter Apple. Maybe it’s time for us all to grow the balls to leave iPhones behind. Beyond the upgrades you feel forced to keep up with, don’t go into an Apple store if you want to keep cash in your account. Their sales reps wandering around holding little handsets will have you owing £2,000 before you know it. Here’s the other choices to give Tim Cook a boot in the stones. And if you don’t know who he is, look it up. On your iPhone.

PHONES & STUFF

GAMES

MOBILES

COMPUTERS

TABLETS

APPS

HTC ONE (M8)

Available from htc.com / RRP: £549.99 YES, IT’S PRICEY, but this is the handset that would lure me into ditching the iPhone. Like a top of the range of sports car it looks stunning, and what’s under the hood is just as impressive. I love the curved design of the aluminium body and the five-inch, full HD 1080x1920 pixel screen is perfect for watching films, TV and surfing the web. Its in-built Blink Feed news channel is brilliantly executed, pooling the best news from all over the world and web. You can also add any RSS feed you want and any social media posts. When you get into this feature you’ll find it hard to stay away. Battery life is very impressive for a phone that does so much and although the camera is only 4 megapixels the HTC One’s Duo Camera system (basically it has a depth sensor for clarity) means you can take amazing photos. And with the Dimension Plus feature you can make your images 3D. And in case you’ve forgotten, it still makes – and receives – phonecalls. TOP-RATED

EE KESTREL

Available from ee.co.uk / RRP: £99

SAMSUNG GALAXY K ZOOM Available from mobiles.co.uk / RRP: £399.95

AT FIRST this feels like a camera that thinks it’s a phone. It’s bulky in the hand due to the fact it has an optical lens that extends to 24mm. But what a camera – 10xoptical zoom with 20.7 megapixels BSI CMOS sensor. It really gives the best digital cameras on the market a run for their money. Let’s be honest, everyone’s taking pics and bloody selfies on phones anyway, so who carries a camera round with them? The rest of the handset is still very impressive – 4G, 1280x720 screen (almost full HD, although occasionally it can seem a bit fuzzy) with Android installed. Not as good as its stable mate the Galaxy S5 but still a very decent bit of kit. RATING

YOU WANT A SMARTPHONE but don’t fancy shelling out the best part of £500? Well, with the EE Kestrel you don’t have to. At just £99 it’s the cheapest smartphone on the market and still comes with 4G. Of course it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles and processing power of its more expensive and well-known rivals but, honestly, for this price, who cares? It’s fast to browse the web (you can stream Netflix very nicely) because of EE’s unique double-speed 4G network, the battery seems to last forever, it’s Android-loaded, the 5 megapixel camera has an LED flash and user-friendly camera app that works better in daylight than at night (but then maybe you shouldn’t be pulling out your phone every five minutes in the pub to take pics of yourself having a great time instead of drinking. You twats.) It doesn’t have a true HD screen and blahblahblah. I’m getting sick of listing all this bullshit for things that were invented to send texts and take calls. But basically, I like this no-nonsense smartphone. If I was being whimsical I’d say it’s the Ronseal of the market. It does what it says on the tin. It isn’t a rip-off. And its battery – unlike the Apple iCuntS – lasts longer than the length of two PornHub clips. RATING

IF YOU’RE INTO have been on y all over this he the heart firstAvailable from various retailers most exciting r RRP: £229.99 It includes a THIS MIDDLE-MARKET SMART- creates someth PHONE is just a bit, well, meh. experience not The design is not particularly it’s the dogs’ b beautiful, its 720-resolution I’m sure mo screen just doesn’t appear that iar with the Ha clear on the Archos’ five-inch Xbox 360 must screen, left, and the 8-megapixel the developer b camera is, to be blunt, turd. who are respon But 4G works well, it has 8GB Yes, once yo of storage space, it’s pre-loaded some of the sim with Android Jelly Bean, has 1GB become appare of RAM and the battery lasts for way grenades a ages as long as you don’t spend to the Master C all day gaming or streaming porn. Destiny is se To be blunt this handset is like after a cataclys the chubby girl with the mousey of Earth and yo brown hair dancing in the night- of the last city club 30 minutes before it shuts... As well as be momentarily tempting but you and maim on E can definitely do better. ancient ruins o And you’ll regret it if you take galactic gangst her home. The story mo quest to reclaim Golden Age is a RATING Halo veteran really sensatio Spartan to suit to what you cou Well, Bungie ter-customisat There is a lim on a character Those of you house with scr will be able to s tomising away The way you you so wish you online commu will be packed As well as th special mentio which are a rev there is virtual

ARCHOS 50 HELIUM 4G

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

TRANSFORMERS

TOASTIE MAKERS

HEADPHONES

SPEAKERS

GAMES

LAPTOPS

NIGHT VISION GOGGLES

DRONES

VUVUZELAS

PREVIEW: WWE 2K15

‘It’s boring and irritating when you see players flying through the air like armour-clad birds from the slow-motion bits of The Matrix’

Last year 2K Sports acquired the much sought-after WWE license and a year on from the excellent WWE 2K14 we are just a couple of months away from their next matt-slamming effort. Although WWE ‘Superman’ John Cena is the cover star, the most exciting piece of news we’ve had from 2K is that wrestling legend Sting (pity his name is stained by that tantric numpt) is to be a playable character for the first time ever in a WWE game – if you pre-order.For those of you not aware why this is exciting I’ll tell you why. Sting is considered one the greatest wrestlers of all time but has never wrestled for the biggest wrestling company, instead cementing his legacy in the NWA (National Wrestling Alliance – I hate typing out the full meanings of acronyms, FFS, but I will so noone can whinge they

REVIEW OF THE MONTH

don’t understand these wrestling terms – even though you should), WCW (World Championship Wrestling and the company that nearly put WWE – World Wrestling Entertainment – out of business in the mid to late ’90s) and most recently TNA (Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling.) This is a BIG deal. Sting’s appearance is believed to be part of the rumoured Attitude-era mode which will allow players to relive the greatest matches from the Monday Night Wars in the ’90s from both WWE and WCW. Other game types expected to be included are an updated Universe mode which allows you to book your own WWE shows and pay-per-view extravaganzas. There’s also said to a revamped WrestleMania mode where you recreate the biggest matches in the show’s history. Other confirmed playable characters include current super-stars such as Bray Wyatt, Roman Reigns and Daniel Bryan as well as a host of legends such as Hulk Hogan, Stone Cold Steve Austin, Honky Tonk Man and Sycho Sid Eudy. I personally can’t wait for this game and got so excited writing this I decided to don Lycra pants and bodyslam all of my kids on the floor. As The Hulkster would say, “Whatcha gonna do when WWE2K15 runs wild on you!” Drink a long, tall glass of shut up juice and get playing. OUT: OCTOBER 31 ON PLAYSTATION 4, PLAYSTATION 3, XBOX ONE, XBOX 360 AND PC.

DESTINY: BETA IF YOU’RE INTO YOUR GAMES then Destiny will have been on your radar for some time. ‘ve been all over this heart-pumping, adrenaline shot in the heart first-person shooter – arguably the most exciting release of the year. It includes all the best tricks of the genre but creates something unique to provide a gaming experience not easily forgotten. To put it simply it’s the dogs’ bollocks. I’m sure most of you reading this will be familiar with the Halo games that made the Xbox and Xbox 360 must-have consoles, and it is Bungie, the developer behind that blockbuster series, who are responsible for Destiny. Yes, once you get a few hours into playing some of the similarities between the two titles become apparent but these are a good thing – the way grenades are wielded owe a special thank you to the Master Chief. Destiny is set in our solar system in the future after a cataclysmic event has changed the course of Earth and you play as one of the “Guardians” of the last city on the battered planet. As well as being able to shoot, kill and maim on Earth you can also explore the ancient ruins of our solar system – grab a gun you galactic gangster – we’re shooting up Venus. The story mode really is engrossing and your quest to reclaim what was lost in mankind’s Golden Age is as compelling as any sci-fi movie. Halo veterans will know the online mode was really sensational. You could customise your Spartan to suit your wishes but there were limits to what you could change. Well, Bungie has brought us a limitless character-customisation game here. There is a limit to what I have time to change on a character (or be bothered to.) Those of you yet to get hitched or fill your house with screaming snot-spewing mini-me’s will be able to spend your ample free time customising away in the style of role-playing games. The way you can play online has changed too. If you so wish you can play the story mode with the online community – which if you’re unlucky will be packed with loads of whiny Americans. As well as the Solo or Co-operative story (and special mention for the cinematic sequences which are a revolution in game development as there is virtually no loss of graphics from game-

play mode), other online game modes include Strike, Crucible and Tower. Tower is less of a mode but more of an area where you can hang out with other players to forge alliances, create special forces and upgrade guns and items. What is very appealing about the game is that it is very easy to jump into and start playing and it soon draws you into the beautifully rendered world. It also isn’t the type of game where you will die

over and over again which for me just becomes fucking annoying. I really have just one minor gripe with Destiny and that is how your character jumps (as I said – minor. But I’m still going to gripe about it.) I know it’s dull as shit to quibble about ingame physics but your Guardian just jumps too bloody high and takes too long to land. It’s boring and irritating when you see players flying through the air like armour-clad birds from the slow-motion bits of The Matrix. Regardless of my jumping angst this is a musthave title. And the world agrees. Almost 5 million people played the PlayStation 4 and PlayStation 3 Betas – so, and I never thought I’d say this, go and join everyone else. They’re right on this one.

RATING: 5/5 (TESTED ON PS4 BETA) AVAILABLE FROM SEPTEMBER 9 ON PLAYSTATION 4, PLAYSTATION 3, XBOX ONE AND XBOX 360.

PREVIEW: PROJECT SPARK MICROSOFT’S GAME-CHANGING ‘GAME MAKER’ title will hit shelves in October and I’ve been getting to grips with the good and the bad aspects of the title. The premise of Project Spark is that you create 3-D worlds in which you are boundless in what you want to create. Basically you can make the game you dreamed to make, but never had the power to do so. In Project Spark you have a terrain which you can sculpt and mould into a complex world. You can add your choice of foliage and animals, and make an environment like no other. Want to get Robin Hood to fight a giant overlord of Planet Piñata? Then you’re in luck. Just pop it in there. It’s like playing a god. You have logic too. A game would not be fun if

it had no va-va-voom. That’s why things need to have “scripts”. Project Spark is very close to real-life game development where you use ‘what if statements’ and so many more complexities I was never arsed to do a computer science degree to learn. Project Spark is complex in scripting logic which is so simple to learn it really does set up the average gamer up for programming in the future. Then comes the bad bit... Project Spark is too similar to the original IP of this genre of play, create, share, Little Big Planet which is due for another sequel this year. Project Spark is enthusiastic in its premise and of course it’s aimed more at teens and adults, but it’s going to be in the shadow of Little Big Planet unless the users get to grips with all the options Spark allows.

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THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

CURRENT

» CONTINUED FROM FRONT COVER

DON’T THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE...

THE THREE BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE

The story all starts with a night out in Manchester. Walking home with friends, he spots a roadside bin with its front hatch open, a very rare sight and one that he could not refuse taking advantage of. Now would be a good time to add that memorable stories don’t come without friends there to witness them or in this case be the reason behind the incident. As Robin climbed inside the open hatch his housemates, who were slightly tipsy, kicked the door closed as a joke. Now the victim might well say he would have done the same to them if they were in that position but unfortunately for Robin the door to the bin automatically locked. The rescue mission was now on.

the judgement. Of course, there are certain drawbacks to having that many sexual partners. Indeed, if you’re plagued by an itchy, burning sensation, then you might be studying in Nottingham, where gonorrhoea’s truly gone viral, or Birmingham, which tops our metaphorical league table for chlamydia in 18-25s. Of course, the real question is how much it costs to get a drink. There are lots of figures floating around, but the same HSBC report that declared Leicester the cheapest university in the country also declared that Leeds was the cheapest place to drink, with five pints of beer or two bottles of wine costing only £12. But who’re the biggest drinkers? It’s not a cheap city, by any means, but that honor goes to Bath. According to the most recent University Drinking League Table by Student Beans, Bath Spa students drink a liver-melting 26.3 units of alcohol a week on average. For reference, the Department of Health recommends that men drink no more than 21 units a week, and women no more than 14. Newcastle has been crowned as one of the UK’s leading tourist attractions. Sure, it’s a beautiful city - but time and time again, what people return for is the city’s nightlife. In fact, Tripadvisor users have voted Newcastle as the seventh best place for nights out in the world.

“We kicked the door closed and it stuck! We’ve all tried pulling the door at the same and we’ve tried tipping it,” Robin’s friend Jack Tame can be heard saying on the video. With their efforts coming up short, they didn’t know what else to do other than call the fire brigade. Cat’s stuck in trees is the usual joke task that fire fighters are linked with but students stuck in bins takes that to a whole new level. With his friends laughing on and Robin shaking hands with people outside of the bin, the firemen arrived. Like any good rescue service they knew exactly what was needed for the job straight away. Producing a little tool from their truck, they opened the bin with ease much to the delight of Robin. Finally able to stand up again, Robin’s first act was to give his rescuers a big hug to say thanks for their efforts. And now his ordeal has realised instant fame as his video has hit the internet ensuring his embarrassing story will be remembered by more than just a select few friends. Unfortunately for Robin (and possibly for the image of students across the land), that isn’t the only story of a student getting stuck in an object in recent time. And this American student’s ordeal saw him stuck in something much stranger than a bin on the side of a street. Tubingen, Germany was the setting for another firefighter rescue, 22 of them required to remove a student from 32-ton stone vagina. Yes you read that right as outside Tubingen University’s institute for microbiology and virology stands a sculpture that artist Fernando de la Jara reveals is meant to signify ‘the gateway to the world’. However, one student decided it would be a good idea (for whatever reason but I hope it was a dare) to jump inside the artwork, only to get himself stuck. A few adjustments and not long later, the student was free, accompanied by a story he won’t want to be telling his family anytime soon. University is a time for embarrassing stories to take place that you hope will never see the light of day. But at least we can rest safely in the knowledge that no matter what we do in our time away from home, there are always people out there that go the extra mile to make sure our embarrassing moments don’t seem as bad.

...but at least he wasn’t this guy...

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

Fashion ESSENTIALS

SASKIA QUIRKE

FASHION EDITOR

Women WELL HEELED

These booties wont keep your toes warm but they will look good.

GET LIPPY

BOOTS, £55, MISS SELFRIDGE

Perfect for puckering up, this balm leave lips super soft and tastes good too

LIP BALM, £8, OLIVER BONAS

ZIP IT

Tick off two of this season’s biggest trends, leather and texture, with this biker

BIKER JACKET, £85, H! BY HENRY HOLLAND AT DEBENHAMS

JUST PEACHY This simple boxy cut is classic with a colourful twist

COAT, £44.99 NEW LOOK

PRINTS CHARMING

print and Take one pretty t collar. add a statemen ve? The What do you ha ent shift. tem sta ultimate

DRESS, £10, PRIMARK

FLOWER POWER Because every lip gloss and mascara deserves a fashionable home

MAKE-UP BAG, £12, CATH KIDSON

ARM CANDY

This chic bargain bag looks like it should costs three times its price tag

GREY BAG, £29, ACCESSORIZE

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E STAPeLblouse g a STYLE t d a vin row-

d h Just a easy t for an or tee d go outfit 8, an SS, £3 it-on E DRE

S ARE DUNG HY PERKIN T O DOR

CLUTCH CONTROL

This popping pink bag adds the perfect punch to any LBD

BAG, £35, MISS SELFRIDGE

The sweatshirt gets modern makeov er with this sequin numb er

SWEATSHIRT, £6 9, HOUSE OF FRAS ER

T STATEMEN S T R SHO age print. vint We love this w bare legs no Wear with d tights for ad st ju d an winter.

, SHORTS, £34 TOPSHOP

OES DE StHo boys E U S BLUE alternative f the irls ar o The g ootwe have f onk shoe must m n, the seaso ,

, £50 SHOES OP H S P O T

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

TOP TIP : WOMEN

TOP TIP : MEN

FLORAL FANCY

COOL KICKS

Statement necklace that will make even the most simple tee wow

This new navy, slate, silver and neon orange colourway makes these these perfect autumn trainer.

NECKLACE, £29, ACCESSORIZE

TRAINERS, £105, NIKE

Half mac, half parka, we love this simple but stylish coat.

COAT, £65, NEXT

MEN

ESSENTIALS

WINTER WARMER

GLOSS FINISH

Paint your lips pink with a slick of this from Stila and it will stay all day

LIP GLOSS, £18, STILA

LEATHER LUXE

Cos accessories for guys make the perfect gift. This bracelet is one for the birthday list

BRACELET, £10, COS

THE WEEKENDER BUTTON UP

From paisley to polka dot to mountain prints, Topman has put its stamp on this autumn’s shirts.

SHIRT, £45, NEW LOOK

This handsome holdall means you’ll arrive at any destination in style

HOLDALL, £50, F&F AT TESCO

POP A CAP ON IT MONOCHROME MUST-HAVE Houndstooth, quilted, black and white - all in one bomber jacket. What’s not to love?

JACKET, £65.99, ZARA

BLUE HUE CHECK MATE

Snap up this tee for the easiest way to work the check trend.

This bright blue cable knit jumper is a real steal.

THE LITTLE YELLOW BOOK

PUFFER UP

Quilted gillets and coats are back. Welcome back the Nineties in this Zara number

bo ive to the ear of e o h s nk

CAP, £8.99, NEW LOOK

JUMPER, £35 BURTON

T-SHIRT, £18, NEXT

ES E SHO ys

This marble effect snapback is finished off with a cool Airtex style design

Hungover? In desperate need of carbs? This book will help you whip up the perfect hangover cure.

BOOK, £8, BURTON

GILLET, £49.99, ZARA

MAN BAG

CONTRAST COLLAR

SKATER SHOES

DENIM JACKET, BOOHOO

SHOES, £59, COS

For an on trend denim jacket opt for a sheepskin effect collar

Simple slip-ons are still going strong this season. Comfy and stylish.

Keep it understated with this grey backpack with contrast straps. Less is more.

BACKPACK, £25, BURTON

ADVICE

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

NO-NONSENSE ADVICE THAT MAKES A DIFFERENCE

Second Year: We’re not Freshers Anymore Job Hunting For Final Year

Students DANIEL ROBBINS

Coming to the end of your ﬁnal year? Worrying about how to put yourself in the best possible position to walk out into a job? Then fear no more as we have compiled a list of some of the best tips to get onto the job ladder, but with a twist. Anyone can tell you to get experience, to be punctual or to have your CV in order. But what can you do to set yourself apart from the rest? Look no further than these three handy tips below!

1 AS YOUR UNIVERSITY OPENS its floodgates to another wave of Freshers that are young, dumb and full of the joys of spring, second year students prepare to face a different reality. This year actually counts towards your degree so it’s time to shake off your bad first year habits if you want a degree classification that doesn’t share its name with a South African bishop. Firstly, you actually have to attend lectures this year. We’ve all been guilty of skipping lectures after telling ourselves “it’s only one lecture – I’ll catch up” although we never do! You can be almost certain your lecturer will be wearing those beige trousers but you can’t be certain of what important information he is going to share with you so force yourself out of bed and go!

Secondly, writing that 4000 word essay the night before the deadline on a heart-attack inducing concoction of Red Bull and ProPlus is no longer going to cut it. You need to plan and organise your coursework more so than your nights out this year. Thirdly, you need to find out where the library is. Note – it’s not in the Student Union’s bar. It’s alright to enjoy your life (you’re not a third year quite yet!) but make sure you’re actually doing the reading and studying as you’ll find it difficult to blag your way through second year. Finally, you must of course develop a hatred of Freshers as they waltz around uni without a care in the world!

CLUB DRUG CLINIC LAURA RAPHAELS

Taking drugs is nothing GBL is used to clean car wheel

trims, however if ingested it can give a high similar to alcohol and increase sex drive. It is a colourless and tasteless liquid that can be swallowed or injected. Withdrawal symptoms can last up to 15 days after the last dose, and it is easy to OD on GBL as there is not much difference in the amount required to get high or slip into a coma.

MEPHEDRONE, branded

meow meow by the media, is a stimulant that can give a similar high to amphetamines such as speed and ecstasy. It is a white powder that can be swallowed, injected or snorted and the effects last for about an hour. When the drug first emerged on the internet dealers marketed it as “plant food” or “bath salts” to get around the law, however it was made illegal in 2010. Some users refer to it as meph, but should not be confused with meth.

NITROUS OXIDE, more

commonly known as laughing gas, can give a relaxed and euphoric feeling when inhaled. It is not illegal and users have taken to openly inhaling the gas using balloons, however local authorities have started to seize canisters from users distributing or taking the drug in public places. There is a concern users believe it is a safe legal high, without acknowledging that it can cause oxygen deprivation resulting in loss of blood pressure, fainting and heart attacks.

BE MEMORABLE If you get the chance to do work experience in your respective ﬁeld don’t just turn up and just get by every day. Do something memorable! Pitch ideas to your boss and leave them at the end of a week remembering you by something out of the ordinary that you did for them. Add your quirky experiences where you have shown leadership or another crucial quality to your CV as well to make your piece of paper stand out from the rest.

BUILD CONTACTS A rather straight forward one but an important factor nonetheless. A follow on from the point above, if you make yourself memorable more people will take notice of you in the work place. Don’t be a shrinking violet, shake as many hands, get as many names and contacts as humanly possible in a week, you never know when they could come in handy.

BE PERSISTENT Continuing on from building contacts, you need to keep in touch with them in numerous ways. Drop them an email every couple of weeks, drop into the oﬃce where they work or give them a call. It may seem like you are being annoying but employers like someone who is proactive and all these points show you are just that.

First Class Honours Closer Than You Think DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

First Class Honours! What an achievement that can be after three or four years of hard work. But that is just what is needed; hard work. It isn’t going to come easy. Luckily for you there are some tips to follow to make the achievement more manageable. The first point you need to consider is that you can’t just wait until the last year to work hard as you won’t achieve what you are hoping for. That’s not to say you have to live in the library and not go out during every year at University, you just need to strike the right balance. You have to break down your hard work over your entire course. If you manage good grades in year one, work will become easier in the years to follow. It is simple really. Planning for your final grade come graduation begins in the first year. Getting into good habits early on is a must so whatever the exam, class test or coursework you do, aim to get the best grade you can! The feedback you get from your work, alongside the grades, are brilliant indicators early on as to where you are in University based tests. From there you have two or three years to improve and gradually work your way up to getting firsts on mock tests. So there you have it, preparation is key and if you get in to good habits early on, First Class Honours could be closer than you think!

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THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

RELATIONSHIPS:

Are you about to go all the way? LAURA RAPHAEL

PICTURE CREDIT SHUTTERSTOCK

There are two types of long distance relationships at university. One that makes university ever better and one that turns you into Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City. Suddenly you are a paranoid wreck, stalking their social media into the small hours and wondering just who is that girl in all your boyfriend’s pictures. And don’t worry the boys are just as possessive, even though they wouldn’t readily admit it. If you are currently faced with the long distance dilemma we have three relationship saving tips:

Communication:

You are going to be meeting a whole new group of people, getting to know a whole new city and perhaps toasting this with a drink or two. Not to e grades, are versity based mention the information overload from lectures. ove and gradu- But don’t get too caught up in your new life that you forget to keep in touch with your other half. et in to good an you think!

Hanging out:

This is especially important if they are not going to university, they will start to feel that they are not part of your life and once that thought process begins, the drifting apart starts. Don’t forget to have a laugh, relationships are fun not a chore. Make them a part of your new routine, plan weekends together just don’t squander your train fare in the SU beforehand.

Work at it:

Over the next three years you and your other half are going to change. You can grow together but this is something you need to work on and more importantly never give up on.

Don’t Put the

STD in STuD PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

Uni is a time for having fun but just make sure it’s good, clean fun. Remember you came to uni to get a degree, not an STD. SEX IS CLEANER WITH A PACKAGED WIENER. If you’re not 100 per cent certain about where your sexual partner has been then it’s always best to be on the safe side. Sex with a condom/femidom might not feel as good as skin-on-skin but catching chlamydia feels a lot worse. Also, DO NOT open them with your teeth. You may have seen it in a ﬁlm and you may think that it’s sexy (it’s not), but doing this could cause you to break or tear the latex so just open it with your hands like a civilised human being instead of a sex-crazed animal. ORAL SEX ISN’T SAFE SEX. STD’s can still be transmitted through oral sex but the risk is reduced by the use of a condom or dental dam. You might be put oﬀ as this can make the act less enjoyable but nobody will want to kiss you after if you’ve got gonorrhoea on your face. If you still aren’t sold then google facial herpes - it’s not good. CHECK YOURSELF BEFORE YOU WRECK YOURSELF. Not all STDs have visible symptoms so don’t just assume you’re STD-free because nothing’s oozing or hurting. If you do have unprotected sex, be sure to visit your local sexual health clinic for a screening. It’s easy, quick, and free and they’ve seen it all before.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MY MONEY

IMPARTIAL, EXPERT ADVICE

Peter Jones

How to budget your money

FROM STUDENT TO MENTOR

LAURA RAPHAEL

DANIEL ROBBINS

Your student loan is probably not only the biggest amount of money you have ever seen but someone has just given it to you. Not to mention, as part of your student bank account you are now the proud owner of an overdra and possibly even a credit card. First of all, don’t get too excited. You are going to have to pay it all back, with interest. But you can make that money go a long way and there are money saving apps, free ones at that.

mySuperList

You’ll probably only appreciate this when you are eating pasta everyday, but to save you to getting to that point, mySuperList enables you not only to draw up a shopping list, but it will tell you how much you should expect to fork out for it and which is the cheapest supermarket to go to.

Vouchercloud

Come deadline day you’ll want to treat yourself and here is how to do it on the cheap. Vouchercloud uses GPS technology to root out all the deals and discounts going in your area. All you have to do is select the ones you like the look off and download them straight to your phone.

OnTrees

You know it has got bad when instead of checking your bank balance you simply pray that the transaction goes through. Don’t. Set up a budget and OnTrees will then keep tabs on all your incomings and outgoings so you can see how closely you are sticking to it.

Coupon Queen Saves Thousands of Pounds Do you like to think of yourself as a bit of a bargain hunter? A super scrimper, perhaps? Well, Maddy Tooke from Essex is here to put you to shame. The 26-year-old student has managed to save over a whopping £22,000 a year by using coupons! Maddy Tooke first starting using coupons when she left her £22,000-a-year job in the army and began to worry about how her and her husband would survive on just one wage. The 26-year-old super saver said: “When I gave up my job to study sports I was really worried about giving up the lifestyle my husband and I had become used to. We didn’t live the life of luxury but we enjoyed meals out, liked to decorate the house and I enjoyed shopping. But when I started looking into ways to save money I couldn’t believe how easy it was. Now I can’t believe I ever paid full price for anything.” Some of Maddy’s greatest savings include booking an all-inclusive sevennight holiday to Ibiza for just over £300, decorating her bathroom for £8.85 and saving £120 a week on food! The ex-medic said she started by looking at her food bill which came to

PAIGE WILLIAMS

around £150 a week: “I was shocked and realised it was down to us not planning meals and further wasting money by buying what we fancied rather than what was on offer. I started by buying food in multibuys and freezing it.” “I also googled voucher codes for products and supermarkets and printed them to use at the checkout. By doing this I got our food bill down to £30 a week.” Maddy also signed up to a variety of different online groups and recommends Extreme Couponing. “Another one is Ten Ways to Have More Money as a Student without Working. People give each other lots of advice on brands which have good savings that month or websites with the best vouchers — it’s amazing how much is out there”. It looks like even the tightest of us could learn a trick or two from Maddy! Extreme Couponing here I come!

STUDENT

DEALS DANIEL ROBBINS

Freshers, you will soon learn that an NUS card is your best friend (if you don’t already know). If you haven’t got one then it is a must over the ﬁrst couple of weeks and here are three reasons why.

If those ﬁrst few weeks are too stressful for you, why not go on a holiday? Even better why not get £65 off already discounted holidays? Well by using your NUS card at Student Universe you can do just that and travel to places such as Paris, New York or Sydney. What could be better?

If you are looking for something closer to home, who doesn’t love money off food, and pizza in particular? Well with your card you can get a 40% discount off your food and drink at Pizza Hut all day Monday and Tuesday.

Finally, a little more boring than the other two but you have to stock up on the essentials. That’s why the 12.5% discount you get at Rymans stationery will be vital for all students, whether it be for note cards or anything else, this is one that will come in handy all the time.

Dragon’s Den is an iconic show. Whether you know all the Dragons oﬀ by heart or just watch the show thinking of crazy ideas you could pitch, it is a programme that most would know a lot about. However, the stories of the people sat in the chairs opposite are often not as well known. Take Peter Jones for example. His journey is definitely one worth following. An avid tennis player, he would help a coach at his local school teach tennis whilst he was on his summer breaks. After four years, he decided it was his time to turn coach, opening his own academy at the age of 16 showing his first move from student to mentor. Like any businessman he has had his lows, but where he is now is certainly not one of them. Employing more than 1,000 people and generating sales of more than £250 million in the companies he has interest in, the Dragon’s Den show is just the start of the array of talents Jones has. When he isn’t focusing on his business ventures, he is ensuring that a further line of entrepreneurs follow him into the field. With Peter Jones Enterprise Academy’s in Amsterdam and Manchester, Jones is backing up his myth that entrepreneurs are born and not made. The example of his success story is no better example and don’t expect him to be falling away at any point soon.

Dragon’s Den show is just the start of the array of talents Jones has.

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

YOUR QUESTIONS: ANSWERED How To Spend Less on a Night Out

PAIGE WILLIAMS

NIGHTS OUT are expensive but they also come with the territory of being a university student so The University Paper has compiled a list of things you can do to save a few more pounds of your student loan. Drink at home before you go to the club. You can get a 70cl bottle of vodka for a tenner at Tesco. Yes, it might look and taste a bit like paint stripper, but student nights out aren’t about fancy drinks and hor d’oeuvres – they’re about getting drunk enough to tolerate the grungy dive that you plan on visiting later in the night. Don’t buy food on the way home. I know you usually crave carbs on your walk home, but food joints are risky places if you’re trying to save money. You go in with the intention to buy chips for a couple of quid and end up with a seven pound doner kebab which is bigger than your own head. You’re better off raiding the supermarket before you go out so you can commit a much cheaper carbocide when you return home. And you don’t have to sit on a cold bench trying to avoid eye contact with the homeless and shooing seagulls as you eat (or maybe you do, I don’t know how unlucky you were with your accommodation). Wear the same outfit you wore last time. Honestly, it’s fine. You’re going to get booze/food/sick (not necessarily your own or in that order) on it anyway, so why shell out for a nice new outfit that will just get ruined? The student population is very forgiving and if that hipster kid in your seminar can wear the same too-big jumper every week then you can go out wearing that top again (just make sure you wash it first).

Top Student Bank Account Options DANIEL ROBBINS

PICTURE CREDIT: SHUTTERSTOCK

ONE OF THE HOT topics before you join a University is what bank account to go with. Rather than looking at the freebies a bank might offer, the account with the largest interest free overdraft is where you should first look. Overdrafts are part and parcel of being a student and should be the main factor when you are choosing a bank. So which is the best bank to choose?

» SANTANDER - Best known for their adverts involved sports stars such as Jenson Button, Jessica Ennis and Rory McIl-

roy, Santander offer one of the best value student accounts. With a 0% overdraft of up to £1,500 and an added incentive of a four year 16-25 railcard, they are one of the first you should be looking at.

» HSBC - One of the highest overdrafts advertised plus some tasty incentives, HSBC is next in the pecking order. With a 0% overdraft of up to £3,000 dependent on credit score and a free £60 Amazon voucher upon sign up, they run Santander a close second in terms of value. They also don’t allow you spend beyond

your arranged overdraft, the only student account that does this which means you don’t risk huge overdrawn charges. Bonus!

» THE CO-OPERATIVE - Despite having their well aired problems, the Co-Operative bank do offer a good student account. They have up to a £2,000 interest free overdraft. not as high as some others, but more students have said that they get close to the full amount by the time they have finished. No freebies to talk of but remember it is all about the overdraft.

RUNNING YOUR OWN BUSINESS EASIER THAN EVER BEFORE

Getting a job straight after University is the Holy Grail for all students, but what if you could guarantee yourself employment and be your own boss at the same time? Sounds brilliant doesn’t it. Many people don’t see it as a viable option after they have finished their studies but forming your own business is easier now than ever before. A quick search in google and there are plenty of sites where students can get loans in a bid to turn business ideas launched into fully operating businesses. Take Enterprise Inc for example. Their aim is to improve the entrepreneurial skills of students who have recently graduated or are in their final year of study. To do this they offer a number of bursary options dependent on eligibility. New businesses are vital for the economy and that is why there is so much help out there for budding young entrepreneurs. Enterprise Inc offers a potential £5,000 support package for students that are willing to pitch a business idea to them. Offers don’t just stop at Enterprise either! The government has their very own website dedicated to start up loans as do companies such as HSBC, Barclays and Virgin. Surely we have all had that one idea that we have wanted to try out and if you are really serious about

New businesses are vital for the economy and that is why there is so much help out there for budding young entrepreneurs.

setting up a business help is out there, you just have to know where to look. So dust off your suit, form an idea & pitch it to a company. You never know where you could end up!

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OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

STUDENT CHEF

PICTURE:SHUTTERSTOCK

How not to poison yourself or your flatmates

Food safety might not be your top priority when you go to university but it is extremely useful to know all the rules and regulations prior to cooking either for just you or your housemate because at the end of the day you don’t want to poison your housemates. It may sound like a boring subject but it’s worth acquainting yourself with the basics. STORE FOOD CORRECTLY - Don’t store fresh and cooked meat side by side in the fridge or put fresh meat or fish where it can drip on to cooked food below. WASH THOSE HANDS! - Always wash your hands with soap thoroughly before starting to prepare food. And dry them with a hand towel rather than your tea towel that may be dirty.

DON’T PUT WARM FOOD IN THE FRIDGE - If you cook something to eat later or have food left over, cool it then refrigerate it as it could warm up the fridge thus making other food uneatable.

REHEAT FOOD THOROUGHLY - If you’re going to eat it hot always reheat it thoroughly which means bringing it to the boil and simmering it for at least a couple of minutes.

WASH UTENSILS Wash any utensils or chopping boards that you have used for preparing raw meat before using them for anything else.

PUT FOOD IN THE FRIDGE ASAP! Refrigerate fresh food as soon as you can after buying it. Don’t lug it round warm lecture rooms or leave it in the car.

USE BY DATES - Some products, such as fish or mince, go off quicker than others and should be eaten within a day of buying them. Products such as cheese or yoghurt have a sell-by date: Use it! TOP TIP IF IN DOUBT, CHUCK IT OUT.

TOP

FREEZER TO FRIDGE Don’t refreeze frozen food that has thawed.

EASY MEALS

FAJITAS

OMELETTE

FILLED JACKET POTATO

BURGERS

TOAD IN THE HOLE

With money tighter than ever before for the British student, it might not be such a bad idea for the old overdraft if you start making your own home meals an steer clear of the fast food and microwave meals. Here are 5 great ideas to get you started. They are all ludicrously easy to make, none of them require special equipment or training, and they may just save you some money!

● Chop an onion, red pepper and two chicken breasts and chop in to thin strips. ● Put together in a bowl with one teaspoon of paprika and some salt and pepper. ● Make your homemade salsa. After leaving to marinade for a few minutes, cook in a pre-heated pan for about 10 minutes. ● Warm your flour tortillas in the microwave. ● Serve with your home-made salsa, grated cheddar, sour cream and guacamole (you could even make your own homemade guacamole!)

● Mix two eggs with two tablespoons of milk ● Add some salt and pepper for flavouring. ● Heat some butter in a frying pan and add the egg mixture. ● After one minute, stir and reduce heat. ● Sprinkle your chosen ingredients (e.g. bacon, peppers,onions) onto the surface and wait for the omelette to set underneath. ● Sprinkle with cheese and then cook for two to three minutes. ● Then simply fold in half and serve.

● Wash the potato and prick with a fork. ● Rub salt evenly on the potato. ● Place in a pre-heated oven at 220C and cook for about 45 minutes until the potato skin is crisp. ● Cut open and accompany with your filling of choice e.g. Cheese, beans, coleslaw, salad, sour cream, chilli con carne, whatever you can get your hands on basically!

● Mix some minced beef (500g) in to a bowl with some salt and pepper with your hands or a spoon ● Dice a small onion and tip into a bowl alongside one egg. ● Roll the mixture into four balls and flatten to make burger-shaped patties. ● Put on a plate and cover and leave in the fridge to firm up for about 30 minutes. ● Cooking for about 15 mins Serve in a seeded bun with salad and any toppings that you desire! E.g. Cheese, bacon, the list is endless…

● Tip 115g plain flour into a mixing bowl. Add salt and pepper. ● Slowly add three eggs and 285ml milk, whisking as you go to create a smooth batter. ● Put some oil into a baking tin and place in the oven at its highest temperature. ● Add eight sausages and cook until lightly golden. ● Pour batter over the sausages & put back in the oven. Remove from the oven when the batter has risen and is golden and crisp. ● Serve with veg & onion gravy for the perfect Sunday lunch1

Now put down the Old El Paso packets and try this traditional homemade recipe. It is so easy and you can even control your spice levels by doing it home made. This recipe is for two:

Always a winner and its healthy! An omelette is quick and easy and can be tailored specifically to your tastes. Simply follow these instructions and you’re well on your way to a healthy diet:

Jacket potatoes are extremely easy but so many people manage to mess this one up. We would recommend waiting for the perfect jacket potato by cooking it in the oven...

We love burgers! Why go out and spend £12 each when you make your own gourmet burgers at home with all the trimmings and added extras. This recipe will serve four people:

Toad in the hole has to be one of our best dishes Britain has created! Get your housemates together and cook this one to feed four! The recipe below is to feed four students!

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

The Top Five Strangest Foods PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE: SHUTtERSTOCK

World’s Most Expensive Food and Drink PAIGE WILLIAMS

PICTURE: SHUTtERSTOCK

Kopi Luwak, INDONESIA, £240/lbs Kopi Luwak, otherwise known as “cat poo coffee” (yes, you read that correctly) is the most expensive coffee in the world at £18 a cup. It’s made by collecting beans from the droppings of a cat-like creature called a civet. Tasty! Yet somehow I can’t see girls Instagramming their #catpoocoffee from Starbucks anytime soon.

Martini, NEW YORK, £6070 What’s the best way to wash down some of the most expensive food in the world? With a £6070 martini, of course! How do you like yours? Shaken? Stirred? How about with a diamond? The Algonquin Hotel in New York works with an inhouse jeweller to create a customisable diamond which is placed in the martini. James Bond, eat your heart out!

Strawberries Arnaud NEW ORLEANS, £2.4 MILLION Arnaud’s is a restaurant in New Orleans that ﬁrst gained notoriety for its £850,000 dessert but that dessert is now worth a jaw-dropping £2.4 million! This is because the original 4.71 carat ring that used to accompany the strawberries served in a marinade of port has been replaced by a 7.09 carat pink diamond. The co-owner of Arnaud’s commented that “needless to say, it is our worst selling dessert.”

Hot dog, NEW YORK, £1,400 A restaurant in New York, 230 Fifth, put all hot dog vans to shame when it released its £1,400 creation made out of 60-day dry-aged wagyu (Japanese cow) and topped with Vidalia onions caramelized in Dom Perignon, sauerkraut braised in Cristal, and caviar.

FUGU,

JAPAN - Fugu is Japanese for poisonous sea-devil. Only kidding, it means pufferfish, but it can be lethal if its toxic parts are not removed correctly. Only highly trained chefs are allowed to handle them and over twenty people have died in Japan after eating the fish since 2000. Seafood with a sprinkling of possible death? Sounds delicious.

PUFFIN HEART

, ICELAND Us Brits are supposed to have the heart of a lion. Well, in Iceland they apparently have hearts of puffins – and they eat them. The books of my childhood suddenly seem a lot more sinister… Fun fact: Gordon Ramsey received a number of complaints when he ate puffin heart on his show, The F Word. How heartless.

A-PING

, CAMBODIA Fried tarantula. People in Cambodia fry tarantulas and then actually eat them. They can be barbecued, grilled, fried or served on a stick. Looks like spiders have so much more versatility than just being washed down the plughole! Apparently they became popular during food shortages under the Khmer Rouge regime but seem to have stuck around. Why, Cambodia? Just - why?

YAK PENIS

, CHINA It’s also known as “Dragon in the Flame of Desire” and if that’s not a great name for a penis then I don’t know what is. Many Chinese believe it is also good for your health. Yum!

ROCKY MOUNTAIN OYSTERS,

US Testicles of a bull. In the good old US of A gnawing on some poor creature’s gonads is not just reserved for the Z-List celebrities exiled to the Amazon for entertainment purposes. The Yanks deep-fry them and they are often found at festivals. Maybe they should introduce them at Glasto. A guy wearing a bandana, playing Wonderwall and munching on a bull’s dangly bits – I can see it now.

TOP TIP -

JUST... NO.

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

MATCH THE QUOTE TO THE CELEB...

I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman

I’ve never really wanted to go to Japan. Simply because I don’t like eating ﬁsh and I know that’s very popular out there

I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a can

I wouldn’t run for president. I wouldn’t want to move to a smaller house

If everybody in the world dropped out of school we would have a much more intelligent society

Trees cause more pollution than automobiles do

1. George Bush

4. Bono

7. Ronald Reagan

2. Arnold Schwarzenegger

5. Christina Aguilera

8. Elizabeth Hurley

3. Gwyneth Paltrow

6. Britney Spears

9. Jaden Smith

21 MARCH - 20 APRIL Your mood can seem intense early on this month with a desire to get organized and give 100% in the process. However, a lighter and brighter mood shines through as Mars powers into Sagittarius, highlighting options for adventure and travel. Later, the Libra New Moon on September the 23rd is perfect for a fresh start as far as relationships are concerned.

Taurus

21 APRIL - 21 MAY The focus on everyday interaction intensifies. The chances are there can also be positive news as you’ll be keen to resolve an ongoing issue with renewed determination. It’s time to make a few changes and clear the air. Later in the month there’s a shift towards health and wellness buoyed by the New Moon, making this an excellent time to start a new diet or exercise regime.

Gemini

22 MAY - 21 JUNE Romantic opportunities can shine through, along with a heightened awareness of your creative potential. Plus you might also find yourself in the spotlight around the time of the Full Moon on September 8th, with an opportunity to show your best face to the world. Later, as Venus glides into Libra, a fun liaison may also take on a sultrier vibe.

Cancer

22 JUNE - 23 JULY Though busy, you might enjoy some down time, with romance and pleasure options hopefully tempting you away from any chores. An existing relationship could become pleasantly passionate too. A sunnier mood showing up from midmonth is likely to entice you out of your comfort zone. Perhaps you’ll spruce up your home with a new look.

Leo

24 JULY - 23 AUGUST A positive and upbeat mood can encourage you to tackle an issue that’s been plaguing you for far too long. The first two weeks of September can see you show a determination to slice through problems and find much-needed solutions. The New Moon on the 23rd can be helpful if you’re taking a study course or want to collaborate on an important idea or project.

24 AUGUST - 23 SEPTEMBER You’re likely to be in your element for much of the month and ready to forge ahead with personal plans and goals. The Full Moon on September 8th might bring feelings out into the open regarding a relationship glitch, but if so try not to overreact. With Mercury edging into Scorpio late in the month, you can find yourself on a mission to hunt out the ‘truth’ of situations.

Libra

24 SEPTEMBER - 23 OCTOBER You may be motivated to take action regarding your financial affairs, only this time you’ll want to grapple with things once and for all. With Mars rocketing into Sagittarius on the 13th you may feel happier and more at peace with the world. Finally, the New Moon in your sign on September 23rd can help you to kick-start important goals or galvanise any existing strands.

24 OCTOBER - 22 NOVEMBER A sense of empowerment can help you power through obstacles and obtain your desired outcomes. Yet it’s not all work as social opportunities are likely to be plentiful too. Later in the month you could find yourself in a phase in which you’ll benefit from relaxing and recharging your batteries

(WE DON’T KNOW ANYONE CALLED ALICE, BUT IT SOUNDED BETTER THAN ALAN)

I prefer Facebook chat to clubbing and I’ve never been one of the “popular girls”. I’ve heard freshers is full on and I’m worried that it is going to be like a playground popularity contest all over again. I can’t wait for it to be over. Rebecca, Warwick Freshers will be one of the best weeks of your ﬁrst term, not because of beer pong or whatever else you have heard goes on… but for meeting people who have just descended on your campus from all over the world. And do you know what? They won’t know anyone either and will be just as nervous, even if they don’t show it. So don’t hide behind the glow of your computer screen, go to as much as possible, and check out the societies your Students’ Union has on oﬀer.

I’m starting university in just a couple of weeks but my loan hasn’t even come through yet. And did I mention I am going to be homeless? You see, I got accepted into university through clearing so was not able to apply for halls of residence in time and my university are saying there is nothing that can be done. Help? Homeless, London Whatever you do, don’t suﬀer in silence your Student Union are there to support you whatever happens during your time at university. You should also enquire about hardship funding for students experiencing exceptional circumstances. So take a trip to your SU to begin with. Also, easier said than done but don’t panic, there are alternatives to university halls and you can still have a great ﬁrst year. First of all check out private halls, this is student accommodation but it is not university owned. There are a number of these in London such as Urbannest and Unite however the rent is likely to be more expensive as they are not subsidised. You can also look at listings on websites such as www.studentspareroom.co.uk for rooms going in houses with other students.

George, Exeter That was quick thinking there George. I’m not saying your girl is a gossip but if she had noticed you would probably be the talk of the town. So don’t be embarrassed and ask her out on a second date, but do us all a favour and take her somewhere other than the boozer.

Virgo

Scorpio

ASK ALICE

I’m obsessed with this girl on my course. We’ve spent a lot of time together this summer and last week I ﬁnally plucked up the courage to ask her on a date. We were both down the local drinking and laughing too much, when I wet myself. I don’t know if she noticed as I pretended to spill a drink over myself to cover it up, but now I’m too embarrassed to even text her. What do I do?

HORRORSCOPES Aries

AGONY AUNT :

I’ve always thought Marilyn Monroe looked fabulous, but I’d kill myself if I was that fat”.

whenever you have the opportunity. Embrace nature where possible.

Sagittarius

23 NOVEMBER - 21 DECEMBER Pushing ahead with ambitious plans can boost your chances of success, even if you only take small steps to begin with. Little and often may ensure steady progress this month. Plus the ability to let go of hurtful past experiences can infuse you with new, vibrant energy. Finally, the feisty energies of Mars arriving on the 13th are sure to give you added pizzazz to explore new vistas.

Capricorn

22 DECEMBER - 20 JANUARY There’s likely to be a lot going on socially and this may well increase your enjoyment levels, potentially offering a chance to mix and mingle with some influential faces. However, go easy around the Full Moon on September the 8th as confusion could mar important interactions. With Venus gliding into Libra as the month draws to a close, a key relationship can help you.

Aquarius

21 JANUARY - 19 FEBRUARY Relationships in general can be at the heart of developments, as well as being fun and supportive and bringing added pleasures into your life. You can also be motivated to explore new options and expand your horizons by travelling, studying or moving in new circles. With your social life perking up, an opportunity to connect with new people and connect business and sociability is possible.

Pisces

20 FEBRUARY - 20 MARCH The Full Moon in your sign on September the 8th is likely to heighten feelings but also trigger a greater desire to discuss any issues. However, while this might be helpful with someone you trust, avoid being too honest with someone you don’t know well. Later in the month you may want to put energy into a plan that has potential but try to avoid promising more than you can deliver.

So, where’s the Cannes Film Festival being held this year?

They misunderestimated me.

TR EN

Who Said What?

he heart of and supportive our life. You w options and studying or cial life perking new people and ossible.

mber the 8th is rigger a greater er, while this trust, avoid don’t know ant to put enut try to avoid r.

TOP 5: TR EN

TRENDING VIDEOS The One With The Friends Reunion JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE Kimmel’s late-night shenanigans regularly make for amazing YouTube hits such as “Epic Twerk Fail,” “Celebrities Read Mean Tweets,” or even “(I Wanna Channing) All Over Your Tatum”? However, this week, he staged a mini-“Friends” reunion that brought smiles to our faces and made our hearts melt. And proving that “Friends” nostalgia unites all of humanity: in just over 24 hours on YouTube, it cleared a whopping 6 million views. See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i4H2JHp5XOQ

Women hanging their bras in protest!

MENTAL AGILITY

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

Women in the Spanish town of Valladolid mayor’s rape comments prompt bra protest urging him to quit. Hundreds of protesters deck the city hall with underwear after Francisco Javier León de la Riva appeared to blame women for sex assaults.

See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXZ2en7M890

2-year-old dominates the Ice Bucket Challenge (AND SWEARS!) A YouTube user recently shared a video that featured a two-yearold girl named Scarlett Rose Davis, from Walsall, who gives the most adorable and sincere apology after using the F word during her ALS Ice Bucket Challenge. The little one apologised for using the “naughty word” before running oﬀ to her playhouse in a cute fashion. We’d be cursing, too, if we had water dumped on us and we weren’t entirely sure what to expect! See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAJ3xrMxoMU

Leonardo DiCaprio’s Ice Bucket Challenge HOW TO RAISE SOME MONEY & ROCK A MAN BUN! Leonardo DiCaprio was late to accept the Ice Bucket Challenge but he made up for it on Monday in a big way. Leonardo, who famously died in freezing water in the 1997 blockbuster Titanic, posted a video as he accepted the challenge. It is rumoured the actor also donated a whopping $100,000 to the ALS Association.

See the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VwCgCrkdZAo

What “Wrecking Ball” sounds like on a recorder SPOILER: IT’S TERRIBLE. As students you know that there can be a lot of downtime and sometimes you just don’t know what to do with yourself when not doing university work. But one guy thought why not learn ‘Wrecking Ball’ on the recorder? The result was… interesting!

See the video: www.youtube.com/watch?v=kYd2dgHzcoU

DRINKING GAME OF THE MONTH: Higher or Lower

Everyone’s favourite dancing show, Strictly Come Dancing, is back on our screens so in honour of Brucie and his toupee, who both retired from the show this year (no more awkward jokes, yay!), The University Paper brings you a drinking game based around one of his greatest ever game shows – Play Your Cards Right. Good game, good game!

WHAT YOU WILL NEED: Three or more players, drink and a pack of cards. HOW TO PLAY: Deal a card to the first player. They must guess whether the next card will be higher or lower. If the guess is incorrect, the player must drink a number of fingers of their drink equal to the value of the card. So, for example, if the first card drawn is a 7 and the player guesses the next card will be higher, but the next card drawn is a 5 then the player must drink five fingers. If they are incorrect and a picture card is drawn then they have to finish their drink. If the guess is right, or if the next card is the same as the current card, they get another go. If they survive up to three cards they may choose to continue or to pass to the next player. You can spice it up by allowing each player who guesses right three times in a row to make up a new rule. e.g. you’re not allowed to cross your limbs, or you must say the opposite of what you mean. Players in violation of rules must, naturally, take a drink. *WE KNOW THAT YOU’RE SO SMART WE DON’T NEED TO REMIND YOU TO DRINK SENSIBLY RIGHT? CONSIDER YOURSELVES WARNED.

for men who know who they’re talkin’ to...

DE NIRO & STALLONE BOB AND SLY BEAR A GRUDGE

NEED TO KNOW

GUIDE TO 2014

SIX NATIONS

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ECO WARRIOR

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for men who know who they’re talkin’ to...

DE NIRO & STALLONE BOB AND SLY BEAR A GRUDGE

NEED TO KNOW

GUIDE TO 2014

SIX NATIONS

CHRIS ROBSHAW

ECO WARRIOR

MATT DAMON

FEBRUARY 2014 £4.20

02 7 9 771353 347258

Emma Glover GETS ALL SWEATY AND STUFF

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KNOW THE INSIDE

DO YOU

T R AC K O N

CAMPUS?

IF SO THE UNIVERSITY PAPER WANTS TO HEAR FROM YOU. We are scouring the UK for student journalists, so whether you are looking for work experience or simply spending too much time in the SU, get in touch today. We are on the look out for opinion leaders and change makers who can write engaging copy. Your pieces will be printed in The University Paper which is read by thousands of students across the UK and you will get that all important byline - perfect if you are looking to build a portfolio. Not to mention that age old adage, it will look great on the CV. So if you would like to be an influential voice for the student community or just have a strong front page tell us what is going on - pitch your ideas to The University Paper, email: editor@unipaper.co.uk

OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

Should you work part time at Uni?

HABITS YOU

SHOULD TAKE

TO WORK

WITH YOU Getting into good working habits whilst at Uni is a good way to prepare for entering the ‘Real World’. There are lots of little things that you can do now whilst still studying which will help you adapt and succeed at whatever career you pursue, here are a couple…

From bar work to waitressing; from volunteering roles to retail posts - the question of whether you should work part time at university is one only you can answer and needing the money (or not!) isn’t always the deciding factor. Here are our top reasons for taking on a part time role alongside your studies: YOU WANT TO BE SOCIAL Whilst university is no doubt one of the most sociable environments you’ll encounter, having a work team to count amongst your friends is a great feeling. Did someone say “after work drinks”?

YOU HAVE SPARE TIME Certain degrees require only a few hours of lecture and seminar attendance per week. If you’re keeping up with coursework but still have time to spare, why not put it to good use and take on a new job? Hours can be flexible to fit in with study schedules, or it may be the case that you’d prefer to plan your weekends around a set Friday night shift.

YOU WANT TO ENHANCE YOUR CV If you’re smart about it you can tailor your work experience to fit in with your degree. Whilst there may not be a weekend job in biomechanics, if you’re into fashion – why not take a role in a department store? If you’re learning about leisure and tourism, a travel agent’s would be a great place to gain some relevant experience and supplement your degree.

BE TIDY – Tidiness isn’t the reserve of those with too much spare time, it is an indicator of an organised mind. Reduce the clutter on your desk and you will not only have a nicer environment, but you will find things much easier! You wouldn’t want your future boss to think you were messy would you!

MAKE LISTS & PRIORITISE – Lists aren’t restricted to shopping, Christmas and things to do before you die. Start making lists – personal and work ones – then get cracking once you have prioritised the important tasks. Once complete, tick it off and feel like you have accomplished something. Businesses use tasking software such as Basecamp and even Outlook to keep track of projects – use them now and you will find integrating them into your job much easier.

CV-Library can offer numerous part time job opportunities and further learning courses (many for free) across the UK. Register for free today and get searching to find the perfect role for you.

PROFESSIONAL INSIGHT :

How to Make Life Easier for the ‘Future You’

‘The future,’ may well be the last thing on your mind when you’ve just started university, however, it’s never too early to start thinking about how you can make life easier for the ‘future you’! For graduates, standing out from the crowd is important, and if you’ve spent the last three years adding worthwhile work experience and life skills to your repertoire, you stand a much greater chance of landing that dream job. Here are CV-Library’s top suggestions for improving your CV as you go along:

TAKE A PART TIME JOB Employers love a hard worker, and by that we don’t mean someone who never hits pause or goes out to play. If you show willing to use some of your spare time for working instead of partying, this will greatly improve your employability later on. Taking a part time role at weekends or during the times you’re not in lectures could make all that difference for your post-university job applications.

LEARN FROM YOUR MENTORS Most universities will assign mentors to help students along with their degrees and coursework. Attend your meetings- listen to their opinions and learn what you can. Most importantly – if you can – bond with them. When you graduate and find yourself looking for a full time role, you’ll be happy to have a

go-to referee to vouch for your personality and attitude. Plus, if you’re keen to get into academia or their field of expertise; their insights and experience could prove invaluable.

MAKE THE MOST OF THE OPPORTUNITIES AVAILABLE TO YOU Hiring managers love seeing evidence of someone who is willing to put their all into making the most of the opportunities available to them. Whether you volunteer as a student brand ambassador, take part in the student elections or even an active role in a uni sports team, everything you can do to show an interest in personal development will mean bonus points for you later on in life. Take it from us - don’t just coast along at university; grab every opportunity you’re given with both hands. You’ll regret it if you don’t.

WWW.CV-LIBRARY.CO.UK

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

OPPORTUNITIES NATIONAL

MANCHESTER

Graduate Graduate Recruitment Sales Consultant Executive

Waiting Staff

Bar Staff

(permanent)

£20000 - £40000/annum +£40K + Benefits London Job ID: 20a1421118

£25000/annum

Manchester

Manchester Job ID: 201421283

£4.75 - £6.75/hour Job ID: 201434531

£4.75 - £6.75/hours Job ID: 201434496

You would be recruiting into both contract and permanent positions. Initially you will start in a resourcing role which will support a substantial part of your training. This Graduate role will eventually see you placed in a 360 Recruitment Consultant role in a fast-paced and lucrative industry. You will be developing new business, increasing your candidate network, attending meetings with clients, interviewing candidates and be writing and posting professional job adverts.

Civil engineering or environmental science graduates are required for this leading British manufacturer. Based within the manufacturing facility you will report into the Director of Business Development and help manage major projects with local authorities, utilities providers and associated contractors. Dealing with engineers, you will assist with enquiries, produce quotes and close business.

This is a great opportunity for students in the Manchester area. Ideally you will have experience of working in relevant establishments, operating tills and credit card machines, and serving food and drinks. You will be customer facing, and like to be on your feet!

The ideal candidate will have a basic understanding of wine, beers and spirits. This role will suit candidates with excellent customer facing skills who are passionate about providing great service. Working hours vary from week to week and can be flexible based around a student schedule.

Senior Sales Assistant (part-time)

Call Centre Customer Service Advisor

(part-time)

Graduate Software Developer

Engineer

£20000 - £25000/annum

Manchester

Southampton Job ID: 201419012

Leeds Job ID: 201403764

£7.21 per hour Job ID: 201369522

£8.89/hour Job ID: 201380654

A large multinational company is looking for a number of Graduate Java Developers in the Southampton area. Graduate Developers must be passionate about software development. You will ideally have some skills with Java, but any coding experience with C, C++ or C# will also be considered. The position will be highly varied and will include designing, writing and testing highquality code as you work alongside experienced developers.

This multi-disciplinary practice operates Worldwide and deals with buildings, transport, environment and energy to an award-winning standard. You will have the chance to work on a fantastic range of projects where you will be designing systems for hospitals, data centres, banks, offices, schools. You would have just finished a degree course in building services or are currently in your final year able for day release.

This firm are looking for a senior sales assistant to assist the Store Manager in the effective running of the store, ensuring high standards of customer service at all times. You will conduct and assist in general retail duties such as; opening and closing the store, cashing up, cash handling and housekeeping.

This firm are looking for an experienced part-time sales associate (24 hours) to join their high street concession in Manchester. You’ll be a key member of the sales team providing an impeccable, efficient and friendly service at all times. You will ideally have previous experience within retail.

(permanent)

Graduate

(part-time)

Electrical Design

(permanent)

(part-time)

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OCTOBER 2014 THE UNIVERSITY

ACCOMMODATION

SURVIVING HALLS

A fresher will learn most things for themselves when moving into Cambridge Halls, in the meantime, here’s some tips free of charge. Get to know your neighbours! You never know when your ‘parties’ are going to need some more heads (always an awkward moment). Purchase a Slip ‘n Slide. Those corridors are the perfect size and it’s always a fantastic idea. Another fantastic idea? Buy a mattress topper. Invest, and thank me later. Make a cleaning rota with your flat mates and everyone’s happy. Cleaners will charge everyone if it’s too untidy and there’s no way that people will muck in together unless there’s a passive aggressive note stuck on the fridge – get it done in the first week and you can forget about it.

THE UNIVERSITY OF MANCHESTER – OAK HOUSE It was 3 years ago my Mum dropped me off at Oak House Student Accommodation at The University of Manchester and she left feeling sorry for me; I on the other hand didn’t look back once. Here’s how to survive… Forget your home comforts. Your halls will resemble the inside of a prison – probably because they were based on a design for a women’s penitentiary in Russia. Invest in some ear plugs and brace yourself for noise every night of the week. The golden time to get some sleep is between midnight and two - but

By RAVEN TWIGG & SOPHIE MCINTOSH

PHOTO CREDIT: WEMMY OGUNYANKIN

Moving in with a group of strangers in a new city can be incredibly daunting. Here are some real tips from real students on how to survive in student accommodation. MANCHESTER METROPOLITAN UNIVERSITY – CAMBRIDGE HALLS

MANCHESTER will soon be alive with the pitter-patter of tiny fresher’s, but what can our newest residents expect of their communal abodes?

don’t count on it. Buy a pack of cards – everyone loves a drinking game, and every kitchen in Oak House must be christened with Ring of Fire. Posters and more posters. Somebody decided to paint the bare breezeblock a delightful vomit green. You’ll need to cover every bare surface with posters, flyers, tea towels – anything to stop the headaches. Enjoy it! Before you know it you’ll be moving out!

CASTLE IRWELL – UNIVERSITY OF SALFORD ‘Castle Irwell is a fortress. You have to sign out when you leave, and back in again - and so do your guests. Its a place where the door hits the toilet on your way in and the residents aren’t trusted with proper kitchen equipment – but none of that matters because the parties are legendary. To survive here, you’ll need a steely determination. And earplugs.

HOUSEMATES THAT EVERYONE HAS CAROLINE MATTHEWS

PHOTO CREDIT: HENRIETTA PAINTER

The top 6 you’ll find in any flat... Forget course stresses and new city nightmares, what fresher’s really worry about is who they’re going to be stuck living with for a year and how they’re going to cope in a house full of strangers.

THE MASTER OF THE POST-IT NOTES: This person has stuff and is under the impression you are about to steal it. Expect passive aggressive notes on milk, bread and other pinchables.

THE CLEAN FREAK: Never happy with the state of the communal areas and wants everything super tidy. Surprisingly unimpressed by your empty beer can tower, which is in fact very neatly and precisely built.

THE GHOST:

Weirdly never there, or at least during normal hours. Occasional scratching sounds from their bedroom will reassure you they’re still alive. Always ‘back home’ when it’s time to split the gas bill.

THE ONE IN LOVE: Or should that be ‘The Two in Love’? Inevitably the object of their affection will pretty much move in and become a permanent object in the living room, the kitchen, the bathroom… everywhere you turn.

THE COOL INTELLECTUAL: Dressed in black, smoking roll ups and talking about their latest vinyl, this housemate probably studies Art History, English Literature, Pigmy Anthropology, or some other Humanities subject. The smell of incense from their room is strong, and they only come out on the ‘coolest’ nights.

nd new city ey’re going o cope in a

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

ELLIE EDWARDS

Your guide to student living in Manchester STEPHANIE RILEY

PHOTO CREDIT: WEMMY OGUNYANKIN

Stepping out on your own for the first time and beginning University is probably one of life’s most exciting new experiences But whilst you’re still navigating your way around the city as a fresher- here’s a list of fun things to do in Newcastle!

veggie bar/café, and The Victoria, a proper northern pub, as well as many other bars and shops. This area is very popular with second and third year students.

FALLOWFIELD

Situated approximately a mile away from Withington, Didsbury is life in the ‘burbs. There are many bars and restaurants here, but it is not as busy as areas closer to the University campuses and is mostly populated by young professionals and families. Therefore the student density is slightly less than what is seen in Withington and Fallowfield. Quieter than the neighbourhoods to its north, Didsbury still has 24/7 buses into the city centre and University campuses, making it possible to keep in touch with all the action in Manchester.

Fallowfield is one of the most student-populated areas in the city, with lots of students from both the University of Manchester and Manchester Metropolitan University living in both halls of residence and private housing. With plenty of house parties, as well as many bars, supermarkets and charity shops, this is the perfect area for students. Housing, mostly terraces or flats, are usually cheaper here than in the rest of the city.

RUSHOLME

CHORLTON

Home of the infamous ‘curry mile’, the Russian roulette dining experience, Rusholme is a great location for students. Within minutes of Manchester University’s campus and student hub Fallowfield, there are loads of affordable Victorian terraces with huge rooms, with easy access to Manchester Super Stores, the cheapest place for miles around to do your food shop.

WITHINGTON Being a little further out from the main campuses of the two Universities, expect a slightly longer bus journey home from lectures and nights out, and slightly quieter weekend nights. However, Withington boasts some great venues: Fuel, a renowned

UNIVERSITY TOP 5’S:

ESSENTIALS

LUCY SIMPSON

DIDSBURY

For those brave enough to make the move off the magic bus route, Chorlton offers the best of Manchester – without the rugby lads stumbling around in smurf outfits. Popular with older students, Chorlton is home to many young families and professionals, but there is still a significant student population - mostly second and third year students, as well as some mature students. As with most areas of south Manchester, bus and tram links offer easy access to the city centre and universities. Chorlton has loads of great charity shops, and bars like Dulcimer and Electric make it a great place for a night out.

Moving away from home can be a big change, so here are 5 essentials that we think will come in handy

PHOTO CREDIT: HENRIETTA PAINTER

FOUR MISTAKES YOU’LL PROBABLY MAKE We’ve all been there (unless you braved the gap year trend), moving away from home for the first time is one exciting, daunting, frantic adventure. Once the haze of fresher’s week is over comes the real part, managing to keep yourself alive whilst living away from home. Here are the mistakes which you will make during university life, even if you’re a third year. It happens to the best of us!

1 2

COOKING. It’s best not to offer to cook for your flatmates until you’ve mastered a dish which won’t give them food poisoning. Moving away from home means having to remember the correct cooking times and temperatures for a chicken, how to store leftovers, and basically learning how to cook. You’ll probably end up making yourself ill at least a couple of times because ‘the chicken looked cooked on the outside’. Maybe watch your parents cook a lasagne and write a recipe down for it, then at least there’s one safe recipe to cook for your flatmates. We’ve personally done this numerous times, and making your two best friends be sick on themselves in the shower isn’t a good thing. CLOTHING. The ‘creased clothes’ look is one which most students end up pulling off. Lack of time, iron or ironing board? Laziness is the real answer. Unless you want to stand out from your friends, embrace the creased look with enthusiasm. Unless of course you try using straightners as make shift irons, which again from personal experience we can vouch ends up literally in flames...

PHOTO CREDIT: HENRIETTA PAINTER

BUDGET: You might feel rich on loan day, but months later all you’ll have in is pasta... and Strongbow.

EARPLUGS: This is Manchester, where you’re never more than 10 feet from an aspiring house DJ.

2 3

CHEESE GRATER: Have you tried cutting cheese?

RAILCARD/COACHCARD: Great for visiting friends at other universities to brag about how good Manchester is. Oh, and seeing your parents.

BEDSHEETS: You might go months without doing washing, but horrible bedsheets aren’t going to impress anyone.

3 4

SLEEPING. Living at home means much more structure. This means at University your sleeping pattern will become a distant memory. Maybe just try and get a good sleep before your presentation, apart from that, enjoy discovering what happens when you stay up until three in the morning running round Leaze’s Park with the cows for company... WASHING. In halls, you’ll make the mistake of letting the washing up build up to an un inhabitable level. Central linkers – you’re one of the main culprits for this! It’s fine to leave your dishes for a couple of days, but after three weeks the sight of mouldy smiley faces sitting in the Leaze’s washing up bowl will not be pleasant. It’s best to get into the habit of washing up on the same day no matter how annoying it may seem.

THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

THE ESSENTIAL QUESTIONS

WHICH team should you join?

SPORT

KATE ROGERSON

Your ﬂat is doing pre -drinks. What drink do you buy?

You’re organising a night out for your team. What do you plan?

A. B. C. D.

A. Drink, chant, curry, chant, bus, chant, club, chant, bus, chant, curry, chant, home. B. A drinking marathon C. Cheese and wine and trivial pursuit old bean

3 litres of frosty Jacks Water Pimms Nothing, you wait to get a pint at the bar

Your ﬂat mate hasn’t done their washing up. How do you react?

Which answer best sums up your team?

A. Drop kick them till they do it B. Do it yourself, it’s another form of exercise C. Politely ask them to do it saying ‘that’s just not cricket’ D. Head for a pint

A. B. C. D.

Bish, Bash, Bosh One more lap Crack on chaps, finished for tea by 4 Let’s get a pint

THE RESULTS

Mostly A:

Mostly B:

Mostly C:

Mostly D:

Rugby. You are by popular definition a ‘Lad’ who likes to get stuck in. Things will get messy, but you’ll see the job done and enjoy a big night out afterwards.

Cross Country. You’re someone who will always put in extra effort in order to achieve victory. But if all else fails: they say you can’t run away from your problems, but you’re going to damn well try!

Cricket. You’re someone who loves a good run around but nothing too physical. You enjoy the finer things in life and simply cannot be rushed . To you, patience is the most important virtue.

Darts. You’re a darts player through and through. On the outside you might seem like you don’t take life too seriously but when it comes to results on the board, there is nothing more important than success. Except for a pint!

Liverpool Road, Castlefield, Manchester, M3 4JR Tel: 0161 837 35535

TEAMS

Special Offer 3 months £79 6 months £145 9 months £198 12 months £249

TO WATCH OUT FOR ALEX MIARLI & MUSTAFA HERSI

MMU HOCKEY TEAM:

Competing in the British University and College Sport (BUCS) leagues, Manchester Metropolitan gained promotion into the Northern 2A league after topping Northern 3A. The team will be looking to build on their success and there is every reason for their new rivals should be wary. The team enjoyed a successful run in the BUCS Northern Conference, toppling teams competing in higher leagues, including a thrilling 4-3 victory over Lancaster in the last sixteen. Bowing out to Sheﬃeld Hallam in the quarter ﬁnal will no doubt have hurt - but they will be spurred on to do even better this season.

SALFORD UNI RUGBY LEAGUE TEAM:

The Salford University Rugby League team is a notable example of how sport can be so unpredictable.

Having won varsity for the last 3 years now, they have still been beaten to the title by the University of Manchester and Manchester Metropolitan in the league. Salford will be looking for more consistent performances this year - can they ﬁnally end the dominance of the two Manchester teams?

UNIVERSITY OF MANCHESTER FENCING TEAM

One of the University’s newest competitive teams, the University of Manchester’s fencing team is certainly one to look out for. The club entered a national beginner’s competition and saw some early success with a number of fencers finishing in the last 16. The team has rapidly built on this success with the women’s first and men’s second team finishing second in their respective leagues. Nationally, they have taken the sport by storm, with Indy Leclercq finishing third at the Ulhman Trophy. Jennifer Schofield beat Catriona Sibert, a UK top ten fencer, to make it into the final of the Leeds open. This is definitely a team to watch this year.

£1 per day student membership Facilities included: Fully equipped gym Over 70 classes a week

Sports clubs include basketball, 5-a-side, badminton, rugby fives, volleyball

Activities include

Sports clubs Swimming pool, sauna, steam room, ladies only sauna

Insanity, Metafit, Bootcamps, Yoga, Circuit Training, Zumba and more. All facilities and classes/clubs are included in the membership

No joining fee or admin fees. Membership constitutes a minimum period of 20 days. Offer only available with valid student ID.

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THE UNIVERSITY OCTOBER 2014

SPORT

TOP SPORTS SOCIETIES

VICTORIA ITA & JOSH NEWPORT

ATHLETICS AT UNIVERSITY OF MANCHESTER UMACCC (University of Manchester Athletics and Cross Country) is a great sport society offering regular training, competitions – and trips to the pub. Athletics training is split into two branches - track and field – and the team takes training seriously, with three sessions every week on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at SportCity. Siddarth Yadav, the current captain for the University of Manchester Athletics team, says “the club is open to all types of athletes. There are no competitive trials in order to get in.” That said, the Athletics Team does train for serious competitions, competing in the prestigious British Universities and College Sport (BUCS). The team also competes against athletes at national level, as well as Olympic athletes like Adam Gemili and Lawrence Clarke. In addition to this, there are various funding opportunities and scholarships on offer for exceptional athletes. This opportunity enables athletes to get additional support whilst participating in their chosen sport. Some scholarship and bursary funds cover the cost of training sessions and team kits, as well as ensuring the provision of top quality facilities and equipment for use in track and field. Also forming an integral part of the Athletics club is Cross Country. This side of the club is more focused on long distance and fell running, with athletes competing in gruelling races of up to 15 kilometres. Cross Country involves time trials over various distances in order to select the very best team for competitive events, but

The ‘Fresher’s Taster Session’ - a timed 5km race – which takes place in Platt fields on September 24th at 3pm, is open to runners of all abilities. ‘You will hear some of our members calling this a ‘trial’ but by no means do we have a minimum standard required to join our club’’ says their website. Passion and determination are just two of many other qualities that are encouraged here within the ethos of the Athletics team. With state of the art equipment and fantastic coaching, you will be able to hone your skills to the highest levels with UMACCC – and with runs regularly finishing up at the local pub, their club has a thriving social side too. Apart from Athletics, there are plenty more sports on offer at the University of Manchester. There are forty-two sports available on campus, all of which are led by current students who study at the university. Each has committee members who play unique roles that contribute to strengthening the foundation of each sport and aim to drive their club to continued levels of greatness. Some examples of committee responsibilities are: club captain, secretary, treasurer, social, kit, tour, media, sponsorship and ‘Freshers’ secretaries. This is one way in which students can help get involved, as well as voice their opinions and those of their fellow team members at the committee meetings. To get involved with University of Manchester Athletics and Cross Country, check out their Facebook page under ‘UMACCC’ or go to their website at www.umaccc.com to view training times and to see up coming events.

SKUM – The University of Manchester Ski and Snowboard Society SKUM by name, SKUM by nature? True, partly. SKUM is one of the biggest societies at Manchester, and one of the largest snowsports societies in the UK. With around 700 members last year, we dwarf the other sports societies at the University, probably because we go much further than a sports club. I hope to introduce you to what we do, and encourage you to come get involved! The biggest part of SKUM is undeniably its notorious social side. We run infamous weekly socials, as well as bigger events, such as the legendary Fresher’s T-shirt party, the SKUM Snow Ball and pre-holiday curries (a curry like no other…). Regularly exceeding 100 attendees, these socials are both popular and successful, and this year we have teamed up with Revolution Fallowfield to keep the prices low and the nights irresistible! Of course, being a ski club, we really should do some skiing occasionally, and when we do, we’re rather good. We train roughly once a week, both on real snow over at Chill Factore, and on dry slope. We compete in the Kings North Ski League, with four mixed ski teams, three ladies ski teams and two mixed snowboard teams. Last year, our 1st mixed ski team came 1st, our 1st ladies ski team came 1st, and our mixed snowboard team came 1st. Notice the pattern? Fear not if you have never raced before however most of our racers hadn’t before university. If you are interested, come to our race trials, or mes-

sage Harry Barnick (our race captain) at harry@skum.info On top of this, we also run incredibly successful freestyle teams, competing both individually and as a team. Freestyle skiing is one of the fastest growing sports in the UK on the back of Sochi, and this is reflected in the fact that most of our athletes only took up the sport here at Manchester. Again, if interested, come along to trials or message George Warburton (freestyle captain) at george@skum.info. We also run regular freestyle taster sessions and ladies only freestyle sessions, where our more senior skiers are on hand to offer their advice and support. Another massive side to SKUM are the hugely popular holidays. This is no ordinary ski holiday however… as roughly 250 SKUMmers descend on the Alps for a week of snow, après and general debauchery. Think lads/lasses holiday meets ski trip, with 250 of your mates from Uni. What is amazing is the ridiculously low price. Lift passes alone usually set you back up to £250 - this holiday costs £354 for lift pass, transport AND accommodation. We’re off to SKUM favourite Les Arcs this Christmas, between 12-20 December. Check out the event on Facebook to get involved! Whilst we do party hard, we work harder, and offer so much more than other clubs at Manchester. Come along to our first few socials and I can guarantee you will not be disappointed.

5 TEAM MATES YOU WILL ALL KNOW

THEODORA GARDOUNI

PHOTO CREDIT: HANNAH RILEY

University Sports teams always contain a few typical characters – here’s five you’ll definitely meet this year:

THE LEADER Ordering everyone around, screaming on the field and trying to be the Captain – this person will constantly remind you that they captained the Bognor Regis under-5s County Football team in their ‘glory days’. You might hate them at first, but that voice makes up for their lack of skills - the leader will motivate and give those all-important team talks.

THE BNOC Your first reaction seeing this person is “where do I know them from?” At every training session, a member of every society and in seemingly every seminar, they’re a big name on and off the field – and will definitely show up for all the socials.

THE SHY ONE Rarely speaks or says hello and sits in a corner waiting to be picked. Head down, they slowly and carefully handle their equipment. This person barely whispers their name when asked – but you’ll remember it, because when they play they’re usually amazing.

THE LAZY ONE You’ll spot at them training talking, laughing, flirting- anything but playing. Suspiciously absent when its match time, the lazy one is, however, the first to sign up for socials and trips, and is always a laugh on nights out – just don’t expect them to be any good at or remember which sport they ‘play’.

THE DUAL PERSONALITY Torn between two worlds: passionate about football and Latin dancing; basketball and chess; rowing and literature. A person that belongs to more than one society faces hard challenges, especially when having to choose between training and an event. Be kind and understanding; hug the person if necessary.