6 minute read
HSV ON ICE
DIZZY ON ICE
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How much power is too much on ice? Wheels joins HSV in the New Zealand snowfi elds to fi nd out
HSV SHIPPED CARS FROM OZ, THREW ON SOME SNOW TYRES AND LET ’EM RIP IN THE FREEZING CONDITIONS
RAKE! Brake! Brake!” We’re sliding backwards in a bright green HSV GTS towards a snow bank after trying to do a 360-degree spin in the 6.2-litre V8-powered sedan – on ice. The roar of the engine as it bounces off the rev limiter drenches our ears because we’ve flattened the accelerator pedal, and the spin has carved up the ice as the green monster leaves us whirling in a cloud of white powder. Only our instructor, on this occasion V8 Supercar pilot David Russell, seems to have a clue where we’re going. But I reckon he doesn’t really.
We’re at the inaugural HSV Ice Drive Experience in the snow-covered mountains at Cardrona, about an hour from Queenstown, New Zealand. Why? Because what’s better than 430kW, rear-wheel drive and snow. HSV has done drive days before, but nothing that combines the stunning backdrop of pristine mountaintops, perfect blue skies and bold slabs of HSVs to crash through the serenity. Queenstown is, after all, a mecca for adrenalin junkies, and where else would you be told by a V8 Supercar driver, “Don’t use the steering to turn the car; use only the throttle!”
“It’s all about the art of driving,” says Nathan Pretty, Bathurst 24 Hour winner and one of six V8 Supercar drivers past and present who happily, courageously, sit in with this group of foolhardy, lead-footed HSV owners and prospective buyers, and me. “If you use the steering wheel [to turn the car], you’re doing it wrong.”
Rolls-Royce gives you membership of toffy clubs; Maserati offers Italian suits; HSV presents customers with the chance to go absolutely nuts, with tuition, laughter and gun tin-top drivers. It’s like Disney on Ice for adults, offering HSV owners something different while showing non-owners how the driver’s seat can be such an exhilarating place And it works.
“I’ve got to go out and buy one of these on Monday,” shrieks Kiwi resident John Kuyf from the wheel of a Clubsport R8 sedan as he drifts it sideways with racer Tony D’Alberto riding shotgun. “I’ll miss this horsepower if I don’t!” he says, laughing harder than Joe Hockey at Budget time. The grin on his face, and the $3700 he’s paid to attend, shows that the HSV marketing magic has won him over. “I’m not really a Holden man,” he confesses. “Put it this way – I’ve got a few Ford things. But I’ve changed my opinion of Holden lately.”
Same goes for Bill Stevens, from Melbourne, who has previously attended BMW drive days but is also up to his sixth HSV. “I mean, what do you do? Sit in the driveway and rev it?” he says wistfully as we huddle in the warmth of the lodge between runs.
We race Murph... and lose
“I WAS going to say ‘Welcome to New Zealand,’ but if you’re gonna be like that…” says Greg Murphy as we rag each other in preparation for a race, on ice. Never has a motor race been held at such slow speeds and high revs. The cars themselves are completely stock, apart from brilliant Continental marshmallow-soft snow tyres (without studs). And when Murph has the same car and tyres as you, you’re pretty much stuffed when it comes to chasing victory. Check out the video at WheelsMag.com.au/TV.
WARNING: V8 SUPERCAR DRIVERS AT PLAY. EVEN DRIVING BETWEEN THE DIFFERENT TEST LOCATIONS TURNED INTO A DRIFT-FEST
Laughing at my note-taking is Greg Murphy, a fourtime Bathurst winner who’s had more cameras poked in his face during the day than most. He’s never driven on ice and snow like this – despite being a New Zealand native – and reckons that makes things a level playing field between us. Yeah, right.
On a 280m-diameter circle, he effortlessly drifts his actual company car – a well-used white GTS – onehanded. Then I get into the driver’s seat. “I’ve never met a journalist who can drive,” he quips. “Well, you’re not about to,” I retort, and gas it all the way up to a wheel-spinning 45km/h. Having such fun at such low speeds is so incredibly satisfying.
As the sun melts the white stuff away, the surface is constantly changing, and it puts Fabian Coulthard, currently second in the V8 Supercar title chase, on the back foot. It also catches out some cars waiting for snow tyres – the only thing that has been changed in preparation for this event – when they couldn’t even make it up the access road. Have you ever seen a group of V8 Supercar drivers comically pushing a Clubsport? We hadn’t, either.
The attempted 360 that has us sliding backwards in the green GTS is something we’ve worked up to after doing the basics: drifting in a circle, and slalom and clover-leaf motorkhana layouts. The combination of huge horsepower and snow makes this a totally alien experience. Only a week earlier, Holden came here to launch an all-wheel-drive Insignia – the car that replaces the Aussie-made Commodore once Holden stops local production – and I can’t help but feel sorry for them. What’s more fun, an Opel or a stonking great rear-drive V8? I can’t imagine anyone choosing the former for a spirited session on ice.
What’s hugely refreshing is seeing supremely talented drivers make mistakes, laugh, adapt, then get the hang of the conditions as we mere mortals try to do the same. The pros work it out quickly, and some of the punters are surprisingly impressive. You’d be amazed how many CEOs can do a reverse-throw on their first attempt.
The iced-up sections have no respect for reputations or Bathurst wins. They’re instant trouble, with zero traction and so randomly located that, as you’re about to high-five a golden run, it all turns to mush in a backwards heap. Game over. Try again. “I didn’t think
WE SPIN. AGAIN AND AGAIN. I CAN’T REMEMBER HAVING THIS MUCH FUN IN A CAR
DAMO GETS HIS DRIFT ON IN GREG MURPHY’S COMPANY CAR. STRANGELY, ALL PHOTOS OF DAMION LOSING CONTROL WERE OUT OF FOCUS, POSSIBLY BECAUSE THE PHOTOGRAPHER WAS RUNNING FOR HIS LIFE
thesnowwouldbesoinconsistent,”saysV8racerTim Slade.“That’swhatmakesitsohard.”
Shedloadsofgrunt,massivetyresandabsolute hoons...Yetthekeyistotip-toethroughtheworstof ittokeepthevehicleundercontrol.Then,onceback onthesnowyparts,unleashhugeroostertails.It’s impressivelygracefultowatch.
Fromthedriver’sseat,it’sallaboutanticipating theslide,plusdelicatethrottlecontrol.Andthat’s somethingIsimplycan’tgetusedto.Murphylaughsat meforbeingalead-foot.“Okay,dabit;dabit;lift-off; okay,backonthethrottle–toomuch!”Wespin.Again. Andagain.Andagain.Youknowwhat?Idon’tcare.I can’trememberhavingthismuchfuninacar.
Whileitmustbeimmenselysatisfyingtoexecute acourseperfectly–somethingIcameclosetoonly onceindozensofattempts–evenmakingafoolof myselfwasahoot.Thesecarsaren’tmadeforsnowy conditions,butdrivingthemheremagnifiesyourinputs andshowswhereyou’reclumsy,andwhereyouneedto getbetter.
HSVconfessedto Wheels thatitdoesn’tmakemoney outofthesedays,sowhydoit?“Thisisoneofthose experiencesthatyoudoonceinyourlife,”saysBurns. “It’sallaboutsomethingthey’llneverforget.”Andthat memorywillhaveHSVstampedalloverit. @DamionSmy
Proveyourself
THISwinterplaygroundisofficiallytheSouthernHemisphere ProvingGround,builtonmorethan400hectaresofformer skifieldsforautomotivemanufacturerstoconductwinter tests.Therearewell-cultivatedicesheetsonwhichtoslide, manicuredfieldsofpowderysnow,andahugecircletailormadefordrifting.Manycarcompaniesandtechorganisations usethevenueforcold-weathertesting,andtotesttyresand electronicsystems.Wesawafewheavilycamouflagedcars thedaywewerethere,butwerebannedfortakingphotos.
V8SUPERCAR PROTIMSLADE CONGRATULATES DAMIONONEXITING THECARPARK WITHOUTSPINNING
SPIN CITY
Use the free viewa app to scan this page and watch Damion dancing on ice.
