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ON THE COVER AUGUST 2009 INSPIRATION
Meet Kaya FM’s Nonn Botha on page 40.
Feed the fierce fashionista in you on page 50.
28
WOMAN ON TOP Grace Mabumbulu finds you the perfect match
30
WOMAN IN ACTION Fikile Moeti is fixated on fitness
32
TRUE MOMENT Tebogo Mashilwane lives for the joy to help others
33
TRUE SPIRIT Iyanla Vanzant answers readers’ questions
34
MAN OF THE MOMENT Meet Ziggy Thabethe, co-owner of the restaurant Sophiatown
90
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL It’s just a number!
104 TRUE STORY University of life
VIEWS
page 90. Beautiful at their age on
44 LOOK AT ME NOW!
SOPHIE NDABA WORE CLOTHING BY VALENTINA FASHION BOUTIQUE, ACC ESSORIES BY SASS DIVA AND SHOES BY SPITZ. ART DIRECTOR Mario Ferlito PHO TOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak STYLI Soga STYLIST’S ASSISTANT Pales ST Mbali a Mahlaba HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mash ishi
64
1 TREND 3 WAYS Trailblazer
68
REAL WOMAN 1 woman, 4 looks
22
YOUR TURN Monalisa Sam is in search of contentment
BEAUTY
24
IN HER SHOES Lebo Mashile takes on the bad black brothers
72
EXTERNAL YOUTH Age-defying tricks
80
BEAUTY NEWS
26
HIS TURN Siphiwe Mpye asks what Mzansi’s men contribute to society
82
STOP THE CLOCK! And turn back your age
84
HAIR NEWS
PEOPLE
88
BEAUTY MAKEOVER
36
CELEBRITY Mariah Carey turns 40
CAREERS
40
ONE ON ONE …with Nonn Botha
106 BOSS LADY Male vs Female: Who’s the better boss?
SPECIAL REPORT 94
GREAT AFRICAN WOMEN In celebration of National Women’s Day
MONEY 110 QUICK, EASY PAPER TRAIL Sorting your filing cabinet
FASHION
CONSUMER
50
REBEL FOR THE CAUSE Rock & Roll is all the rage
116 SCORE ON A ‘SKEDONK’ Tips to buy a used car
58
FASHION MUST-HAVES Freeze frame
60
FASHION NEWS
62
FASHION LESSON Go vintage
SEX 118 O-O-ORGASMIC! Three women tell their orgasmic tales of sex
You’re invited to Siphokazi’s townhouse on page 166.
MIND AND SOUL 122 Tips for soulful living
RELATIONSHIPS 124 FAMILY MATTERS Handling your ‘difficult’ family members
160 TRADITIONAL FOOD COMPETITION Meet our 23rd winner! 162 CHEF OF THE MONTH
EDITOR Dorah Sitole DEPUTY EDITOR Mapula Nkosi ASSISTANT EDITOR: BUSINESS Kantha Govender PRODUCTION/ADVERTORIAL MANAGER Lindsay Anne Cilliers ART DIRECTOR Mario Ferlito SENIOR DESIGNER Esma Anderson DESIGNER Sihle Madlala PICTURES EDITOR Tsholofelo Rapodile SENIOR COPY EDITOR Nadia Goetham COPY EDITOR Hayden Horner BEAUTY EDITOR Ayanda Bikitsha FASHION EDITOR Mbali Soga FOOD EDITOR Tumelo Sebopa FEATURES EDITOR Melinda Ferguson FEATURES WRITER Nonhlanhla Khumalo JOURNALIST Kemong Mopedi PARENTING WRITER Michelle Shaw HEALTH WRITER Beth Cooper MARKETING MANAGER Tamryn Palm MARKETING ASSISTANT Zandi Sokhela OFFICE MANAGER Kate Hawkins EDITORS’ PA Sonja Jones PHOTO RETOUCHER Repro North MEDIA24 MAGAZINES
Thought
ideas happen here
DECOR 166 HUMBLE ABODE At home with Siphokazi
HEALTH
TL ESCAPE
128 HOW OLD IS YOUR BODY? When your heart is older (or younger) than you are
20
PARENTING
176 DRIVE
136 OPEN WIDE AND SMILE! Dental care for your child
180 BOOKS
SUBSCRIPTIONS
126 GIVE-AWAY 172 TRAVEL 178 MUSIC 182 WATCH
FOOD
186 CROSSWORD
142 GO WEST! Food from Ghana, Senegal and Nigeria
188 SOAPS 196 PLAY
150 EVERYDAY FOOD Glowing goodness
IN EVERY ISSUE
155 ROASTED LEG OF LAMB Step by step recipe
14
EDITOR’S LETTER
16
LETTERS
158 FOOD NEWS
184 HOROSCOPES
MANAGING DIRECTOR, MEDIA24 Francois Groepe CEO, MEDIA24 MAGAZINES John Relihan CEO & PUBLISHER, THOUGHT24 Jonathan Harris PUBLISHING MANAGER: CIRCULATION Maarten Kuhn KEY ACCOUNTS EXECUTIVE: SUBSCRIPTIONS LuAndré Volschenk ADVERTISING MANAGER Theuns Venter FINANCE MANAGER Asiem Nordien HEAD OFFICE: 5A Protea Place, Protea Park, Sandown; PO Box 784696, Sandton 2146. Tel: 011 322 0880, Fax: 011 322 0709; email: truelove@media24.com. ADVERTISING SALES DEPARTMENT: ACCOUNT MANAGER JHB: Greg Dunn 011 322 0730 ACCOUNT MANAGER JHB: Tina Magondo 011 322 0702 ACCOUNT MANAGER CT: Anneli Moolman 021 446 5064 ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE DBN: Gina Van de Wall 031 566 5432 CAPE TOWN ENQUIRIES: Taheerah Joshua 021 446 5068 DISTRIBUTION AND MERCHANDISING MANAGER: Hannes Halvorsen NATIONAL SALES MERCHANDISING MANAGER: Elmarie Vermaak TRUE LOVE is owned by Media24 and published by Thought24. Printed by Paarl Gravure. (Reg No 1950/038385/06) VAT No 4150102228 TRUE LOVE is distributed by NND24.
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EDITOR’S LETTER This month’s cover shoot saw Sophie Ndaba get the royal treatment from make-up artist Nthato Mashishi (right) and Paledi Segapo.
In May I had the opportunity to address students from the University of Cape Town about my career and personal life journey. I felt rejuvenated in these ambitious young people’s presence and I’m convinced that this generation is braced for a successful future.
that contain age-defying ingredients, page to Tumelo Sebopa’s Everyday Food recipes on page 150. As the saying goes: “For the first half of your life, people tell you what you should do; for the second half, they tell you what you should have done.” But as your favourite magazine, we endeavour to inform you as much as we can in the hope that you will take heed. Enjoy the read and have an awesome Women’s Month!
STRUGGLING TO FIND A COPY OF TRUE LOVE MAGAZINE? If your local stores have been sold out or don’t stock TRUE LOVE, please SMS “TRUELOVE/the name and area of the store” to 32510 and we’ll see to it that this is rectified. SMSs are charged at R1 each.
14
TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
PHOTOGRAPHY Nick Boulton; Judd van Rensburg HAIR and NAILS Abina’s Hair Salon MAKE-UP Faith Seuoe CLOTHING Riga Boutique
ith August being Women’s Month, it gives us the opportunity to honour the wonderful women of our country and continent. I always find it inspiring to profile these great dames and am certain their strength, wisdom and love for humanity are an indication of our own, usually dormant, capabilities. But as we attend the various Women’s Day celebrations, let’s never lose sight that these are not only about networking, but also about equipping ourselves for service to others. After all, isn’t our ultimate purpose in life to be of service to humankind? This month we feature 50 awesome women, starting with our Cover star, Sophie Ndaba. You can read her uplifting story on page 44 where she opens up her heart to Melinda Ferguson. Sophie, together with her co-star Connie Ferguson, are the only remaining cast members who starred in the very first episode of Generations 15 years ago. How is that for resilience and finding your niche in life? In our Special Report on page 94, also written by Melinda Ferguson, we pay homage to women who have made an impact on our continent and the rest of the world. Through their selfless hard work and vision some of them have influenced politics and helped bring about the democracy we are enjoying now. We also added a few controversial figures, some whom have piqued our interests and others whom have made us squirm. This issue also focusses on age and in Life Is Beautiful on page 90, Nonhlanhla Khumalo speaks to four women who have been blessed with good genes and, as Nonhlanhla puts it, “who embrace their respective ages by living their lives with passion and determination”. And if you want to turn back the hands of time on your own age, there is help at hand. In our Beauty feature on page 72, Ayanda Bikitsha offers a range of anti-ageing solutions. According to Ayanda, “Age has become a major concern for most of us, and women of colour are, now more than ever, going all out in their pursuit of a younger looking skin”. A healthy eating plan will also help you to maintain radiant skin and a youthful appearance and prevent some lifethreatning illnesses. For more on healthy yet delicious foods
LETTERS
LETTING GO
’d like to congratulate Elizabeth Arden for acknowledging that brown-skinned women do exist and for choosing the right face to represent their brand. Lerato Moloi, the face of this brand, is so gorgeous and proves that one doesn’t have to have a European complexion to be considered beautiful. We have long been bombarded with ads that insinuated that   (which you have to be light-skinned to get the right products why
our is
sisters were bleaching their skins in the ’70s). I have the same skin tone as Lerato, even though she is more refined than I am. When I first saw the ad I OPRAH H,, T thought to myself, “some beauty house has finally acknowledged the reality HO USHE ERR VINTA T GE TAGE & JAY-Z AY AY-Z FASHIO N that they are selling their products in Africa�. What I like even more about FEEL THE CREDIT TOO USSY, USSY,, CRUNCH the campaign is that she is not made to wear the sad wigs that black TOOFUSSY BOSS SSY? SS Y? KHABON GIRL, IRL, THAT A ’S WHY AT INA Y OU’RE SINGLE! QUBEKA sisters wear these days. ‘POLE-DANCE & SAVE YOUR MY M MAN AN MARRIAG E’ Nosipho Ngwenya, Mdantsane GOT GO T ME ALL A WOM ALL WOMAN AN NEEDS
women who aren’t ready to have children. To make matters worse, some of my colleagues had just had babies and were flooding my inbox with baby photos and cuddly baby news. One day I broke down because it was all too much for me. I bought TRUE LOVE to cheer me up, only to discover that it was the Mother’s Day issue (in Malawi, we celebrate Mother’s Day in October). I had initially cringed at the thought of having to go through more “happy mommy� stories, but I was surprised at the mature way your magazine handled the content. You didn’t fictionalise motherhood, which often makes it seem like “a walk in the park�. It depicted real moms with their joys and frustrations, and I especially loved Lebo Mashile’s column, who, although not a mom herself, expressed the need for mature, responsible motherhood to raise sons. There’s more to motherhood than raising a child to adulthood. Bertha Banda, Malawi
NOBLE CAREERS
I have been reading TRUE LOVE for three years and the first pages I usually check is the Careers section. Every time I read these pages it is always about “glamorous� careers and I’ve always felt like I made the wrong choice even though my profession feels so right to me. Reading the “forgotten careers� story in the June issue of TRUE LOVE made me feel so honoured. I have been teaching for four years and I’ve never heard my learners show any interest in teaching as a career. Teaching is looked down upon because of the measly salaries we earn. I look forward to seeing more stories on teaching. Samantha Seabela, Saulsville
TRUE STORYL
In response to the Sex feature, Do You Trust Him... Completely?, in your June issue, I would like to thank TRUE LOVE for bringing this issue to the fore. It’s so unfortunate that we live in an era
FROGGIE SHOES FOR THE WINNING LETTER!
‘I’LL KILL YOU IF YOU TELL...’ JULY LLY 2009 / NO 365
9 770256
    
LOVE WITH YOUR HEADS, TOO
A SEX THERAPIS IST T
LIFESTYLES OF THE FIT & FABULOUS JULY 2009 NO 365
I recently had an abortion by choice and being a pro-choice person who has debated and fought for our lawmakers in Malawi to legalise it, I thought it would be an uncomplicated experience. (Abortion in Malawi is still illegal, except for cases of health). When I discovered that I was pregnant, I felt unprepared to take on the task of raising a child. I was in a new relationship and didn’t think it was the right time for us to be pregnant. With a bit of help from friends, I had a safe abortion without resorting to a backstreet one. I went about my duties normally but was then surprised by the depression that followed. I felt a bit lost and shy to express what I was feeling because I thought it’d be contradictory to all the work I’d been doing to help
BEAUTIFUL, BROWN-SKINNED LADIES
ALL A WOMAN NEEDS
ABORTION BLUES
WINNING LETTER
TRUE LOVE
I truly admire Neo Tshatsinde (True Story, June 2009) for sharing her story. I, however, get the feeling that she still blames her parents, teachers and community for how her life turned out. From my own experiences, I’ve learnt that the first step to healing starts by letting go of the blame, the resentment and the anger. We must allow ourselves to feel the hurt, while admitting that we each have a bigger part to play in our own lives; the ultimate decision lies with the individual. We must embrace our past, whether happy or sad, learn from it and move on. Lindy Mtshali, Brackenhurst
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where our health lies in the hands of our spouses’ behaviours. I have seen a few families fall apart, wives left widowed, and children left orphaned, due to the recklessness of parents. We are informed about sexually transmitted illnesses from time to time, but the reality of the situation is that people are still not learning. Gone are the times when fathers would go work in the mines for six months and thereafter come home to their wives and resume their “duties� as if they’d never been away. Today, your man could leave for two hours and return with an incurable disease. It’s vital to recognise that any kind of infidelity could put you at risk, so to all the women out there, let’s learn to love with our heads and not only with our hearts. Zipho Poyo, Margate
Write to TRUE LOVE, PO Box 784696, Sandton, 2146, or email letters@truelove.co.za, or fax 011 322 0709. You may use a pen name in your letter, but please include your full name, address and phone number. Letters and emails without these details will not be published. We reserve the right to edit all letters to suit our editorial style. This month, Nosipho Ngwenya wins stylish pairs of Froggie Shoes. Proudly made in South Africa with the finest quality leather and designed in conjunction with a podiatrist, Froggie has a range of shoes to update your wardrobe with style and comfort. Froggie Shoes are available from all major shoe retailers nationwide, or call 031 450 0200, or email consumer@michelle.co.za for your nearest stockist.
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TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
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If you SUBSCRIBE to TRUE LOVE this month and pay R203,04 for 12 issues – a 20% discount – or RENEW your existing subscription for only R193,95 for 12 issues – a 25% discount – you could receive a limited edition TRUE Wallet LOVE Ladies Travel Wallet!
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YOUR TURN
Monalisa Sam believes that being true to yourself is the only way to live a fulfilling life.
ARE YOU CONTENT? any women in their 20s find themselves trying to make sense of the emotional turmoil that comes with being a young adult in these ever-changing times. The constant feeling of not being fulfilled or content, but at the same time, not being able to identify what is missing or what it would take to make you feel content, is a common complaint these days. As a result, many young women, sadly, find themselves looking for this “fulfilment” in the wrong places. The results that come from this search can often be devastating. How many times have you read or heard of the woman who seemed to have it all? A budding career, fancy car and a beautiful home – all achieved at a fairly young age. So how did she end up being beaten up by her “wonderful” boyfriend every day? How did she end up abusing alcohol secretly in an attempt to mute all the pressure she put on herself to achieve more? How
does the same woman end up spending thousands of rand on therapy to try and help her make sense of it? Experts have called this confusing time the quarter-life crisis. The inability of young adults to make sense of different emotions
ing in the moment and truly taking it all in. Everything has become such a rush to get through something or get over someone. Climbing up the career ladder as fast as humanly possible; getting over the heartaches so that you can move on to someone else and, finally, getting the right passes into social circles and friendships – all in a quest to feel fulfilled and validated. All these “goals” are, of course, constructive but they become so much more meaningful when you look at yourself in the mirror and ask: “Why do I want to achieve career success?” Is it because my parents expect me to do so, or is it really something that I am truly passionate about? “Why do I want to be in a relationship?” Is it because all my friends are getting married and starting families, or is it because I believe myself to be worthy of love and giving love? There are so many things we don’t ask ourselves as women, including why we do the things we do. Sometimes it is all in the rush to construct the “perfect” portrait for all to see and, when it has been achieved, you cannot understand why you still don’t feel content. The fact is you can only find contentment when you do things that are a reflection of all the things that are true to you and no one else. Your truth is only revealed when you ask yourself what it is that you want for your life and what you want to achieve in this phase of your life. Do you want to
‘... IT IS ALL IN THE RUSH TO CONSTRUCT THE “PERFECT” PORTRAIT FOR ALL TO SEE AND, WHEN IT HAS BEEN ACHIEVED, YOU CANNOT UNDERSTAND WHY YOU STILL DON’T FEEL CONTENT.’ as they try to establish themselves in the world. It is somewhat comforting that there is a definition and, perhaps, guidelines on how to overcome the quarter-life crisis, but it doesn’t always make things easier, because there are many times when you’re unable to explain what you are feeling. As I mission through my 20s, I’ve realised that one of the fears I have is not truly liv-
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look back on your 20s and not identify with anything that you achieved or haven’t achieved? Or do you want to look back and feel content that you did everything your way? Life is too short to live a life that was not intended for you, or paint a picture of what you believe the world wants to see. Live your life today! ■
in her shoes
STREETS OF FEAR
am standing outside a girlfriend’s house, pretending to leave in the way that I always do when our conversations pour out of the door, past the gate and into the street. We end up standing outside for more than 20 minutes, gabbing endlessly. As I initiate my fourth attempt to walk towards my car, a silvergrey BMW pulls up. There are three men in the car. The driver is youngish, chocolate and would be considered handsome in many circles. He says, “I saw you and decided to stop. I will wait for you to finish.” I say, “I don’t stop for strangers in cars. I don’t want to talk to you. I am here with my friend.” He pushes harder, “I recognised you as I was driving. You don’t have to rush; I will wait.”
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true lovE AUGUST 2009
From the time I was a teenager, I’ve had a serious disdain for car-hoppers – those girls who will run to a nice car and lean over the door just to let everyone in the neighbourhood know that “their man” has a fly ride. I vowed then that I would never be a chick who hits the brake for a guy who pulls over and beckons me… ever! Finesse is something that you either have or you don’t, much like sensitivity. Not only is pulling over and leaning out of your window to solicit the attention of a stranger tacky – in South Africa in 2009, it is threatening behaviour. I know a beautiful gay dancer who was shot by a guy in a stolen BMW seconds after they robbed him of his bag, wallet and cellphone. My friend assumed that they would ask him for directions. He says the first thing that he thought to himself as he approached the car was, “I hope these guys are cute.” What I am about to say is not fair, it is not kind, but it is true: I am afraid of black men. I say this with shame in my heart as a black woman who has loved black men my entire life. There are men who have shared my life whose existences are invaluable to me, because they support, protect and provide for me in ways that I could never measure. This love, however, does not erase the fear I feel when I’m driving alone and I see two black men standing idly at the intersection I’m approaching. This love does not stop me from double-checking whether my doors are locked. This love doesn’t make the fear go away when I can “feel” men walking behind me in the street as I’m clutching my bag. This love doesn’t stop me from spending a small
fortune every month on security, nor does it allay the terror in my heart when I hear men talk about how they can’t wait for a certain pretty little girl to grow up. I think it is time for men to be aware of the fact that their presence, especially at times when we are vulnerable, is frightening. Of course, there will be a legion of good black men who will read this and be completely pissed off because they’re not part of the problem, but if you truly love women, you will accept that when we see you in the street, we cannot tell the difference. If criminals came with a warning label, we wouldn’t be in this situation. I was in Bern, Switzerland, a few years ago, which happens to be a very safe place. It always takes me a little while to forget that I am not under siege when I’m in other places in the world. One night, while I was heading back to my hotel after having dinner with a friend, I could feel a man walking behind me. Our final destinations were very close to one another, because we turned the same corners as we travelled. I guess he must have felt the fear in me because he crossed the street and quickly walked in front of me, just to show me that he wasn’t a threat. I wish our brothers would do small things just to let us know that we shouldn’t feel afraid. Grace, humility, warmth, sensitivity and vulnerability always work. To the man in the BMW who I eventually ignored as I got into my car and left: if your intentions were pure, I am sorry. I am sorry for all of the aggressive Neanderthals as well as the libidinal Lotharios who have made me the skeptic that I am today. n
PHOTOGRAPH True Love Library
Lebo Mashile is ashamed to admit that she fears lurking, leering black men.
HIS TURN
WHO ARE WE? Siphiwe Mpye scrutinises the modern South African man and his contribution to society.
26
TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
contribution to society is. The evolution of men in an evolving society is a great thing. But a look at society leads me to wonder if we really are evolving and if the answer affirms this, if this is happening for the good of all society? Whilst we continue to see a flux in men’s identity and the varied choices we make to manifest what it is we feel about ourselves,
‘WHILE ANOTHER TREATS HIS MOTHER LIKE A QUEEN, HE VIRTUALLY IMPRISONS HIS GIRLFRIEND.’ there remains a majority for whom such considerations are superfluous. For the majority of rural men, for example, reality is a far cry from our urban SUV and mall truth. There remain some among us for whom the promise of a new way of life – one in which they could eventually take for granted running water, electricity and visible policing – seems a lifetime away, if at all attainable. There also remain men who terrorise entire communities unabated while “comrades”, whose occupation during the struggle, next to destroying “the system”, was to drive such lecherous goons from our grandmothers’ homes, are instead involved in a fiercely contested tummygrowing competition, while chasing tenders and jostling for political clout. Meanwhile, I still hear the same stories from women across the spectrum. When
know better, languishing in hospital for the umpteenth time after a barrage of fists and boots. Sadly, one way or the other, he is all of us. Is our tattered, self-serving interpretation of “culture” conveniently tying our hands or are we haunted by our own violent behaviour behind the veneer of suburban bliss? Are we the pot that dares not call the kettle black? Have years of institutionalised hatred made us believe in our own worthlessness so much that we have torn down the pedestal our women stood firmly on once upon a time? So I ask the dynamic, evolved, welladjusted man of the Discovery Channel survey where the hell he is. Where is he hiding and from what? Or is he just an enlightened, cerebral, go-getting coward? ■
PHOTOGRAPH True Love Library
he Discovery Channel’s recent worldwide survey on men confirmed many things about us but it also intrigued me for what it didn’t reflect. The survey showed that the quality and complexity of our interpersonal relationships exceed our past’s perfunctory sameness. We’re working harder, expecting quicker and more rewarding results. We’re not loyal to our jobs and our employees reciprocate most willingly. Competition is more intense for both scarce resources and the means by which they are acquired. We are better travelled, more exposed and better adjusted to our unique global context. It starts getting interesting when the survey suggests that women’s contemporary status as equals means we negotiate more, we are more amiable to compromise, suggesting an unfettered respect. Really? We will come back to this. So, who exactly are we then? Well for one, today’s man is clearly not one-dimensional. But by the same token is not, as GQ’s Dylan Muhlenberg so aptly notes, “…a retro/metro/techno or anything ending in ‘sexual’”. His complexity is beyond labels. The world has moved at such a rapid pace, we simply have no time to completely dissect and define what kind of man we are seeing on our urban streets. So the question is not so much who he is, but what his
they leave their homes they have to run a disrespectful, horny, misogynist gauntlet of construction workers, bank tellers, taxi drivers, cops and bosses. Everywhere a black woman turns, she is being violated. I am not suggesting that white women do not and have not faced forms of discrimination, but I have never heard of a white woman sexually assaulted by multiple strangers for wearing a mini skirt while an entire community watches. Only in movies do white women experience wolf whistling from men with hard hats standing on scaffolding. Down south, that is mostly the domain of black women and in this movie, the whistling is accompanied by the most intrusive suggestive remarks. So who is this disgusting, embarrassing guy? Well, it is the guy behind you in the queue and the guy at the notorious Noord Street taxi rank. This guy is also our friend, our brother and our colleague. The one with whom we laugh nervously when he cracks a sexist joke. The one who proclaims proudly that he doesn’t hit women while he exercises a disturbing verbal, mental or financial terrorism over his wife. While another treats his mother like a queen, he virtually imprisons his girlfriend. There is also the type who ponders: “Who am I to interfere in another man’s domain?” when he sees a sister, who should
true lovE august 2009
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WOMAN ON TOP
THE PERFECT MATCH Grace Mabumbulu divides her busy workday between her job in the public service and matchmaking. She tells Nonhlanhla Khumalo about her exciting double life. ’ve worked with people almost all my life and through my work, I realised how hard it is for working professionals to meet potential partners. Also, the market research that I’ve done showed there’s a need for this type of service, particularly for the black market. How did your family feel about your business idea? My extended family has always encouraged me to do something like this, as they’ve always known me to be a matchmaker. They were happy when I started the business and my children are my champions; they think it’s a unique idea. Are young black people open to joining a dating agency? Matchmaking has always been a part of many South African ethnic groups’ existence. Black people never had a staunch arranged marriage tradition, but our grandparents and parents used to be matchmakers, and that’s how most people ended up getting married. In rural South Africa, matchmaking is still a major part of dating. What makes de la Crème Matching different from other dating agencies? When people think of dating agencies, they think online dating. We meet with our clients and do an in-depth interview with them about the type of people they are and the type of person they’d like to meet. When we find a good match, we introduce them to one another. We also do singles events, and workshops with relationship and dating experts. We are the only dating agency that guarantees an introduction. You also work fulltime for the government; tell us more about that job.
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I head the Joint Initiative for Priority Skills Acquisition and Human Resources Development programmes, within the Presidency. Former deputy president, Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka, started JIPSA, which focusses on accelerating skills development. We work on joint solutions with the public and private sectors to bridge the skills gap; do targeted interventions, and have changed legislation to make it easier for people to gain access to education and skills. How do you balance the two careers? My two careers are quite compatible, as I’m always working with people. It’s about making a difference in someone’s life, whether it is giving that person an education or finding the perfect partner. I find both very rewarding and fulfilling. Have you had any successful matches since you started your business? We have had a number of successful meetings between potential partners. Some couples are dating, while others are in relationships. We’ve achieved a lot in less than six months and the numbers are growing. I started with 20 people on my database, and the number has grown to 600. Why do you think your business idea is a good one? It doesn’t cost much to start a dating agency; rather than money, you’ll need intellectual capital. How has the economic downturn affected your business? When times are tough people start to re-assess their priorities. There’s nothing more important than love and family and in these tough times, more and more people realise the need for a balanced life. People love more during the hard times. ■ For more information on de la Crème Matching, visit www.dlacreme.co.za.
PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch STYLIST Oratile Seabela MAKE-UP Adelaide Khosi Mthembu CLOTHING Jo Borkett SHOES Foschini
How did your idea to start a dating agency come about?
True Love Woman In Action in association with SANEX
GET A FITNESS FIX Fit AND friendly, Fikile ‘FIX’ Moeti is no doubt living the life of her dreams, writes Beth Cooper.
o two days are the same for this 22-year-old video jockey and DJ. You’ll always find her racing from one meeting to another, expertly beating deadlines. Born in the Eastern Cape and a University of Cape Town (UCT) graduate, Fix, as she’s known to friends and fans, believes that exercise and enjoyment of what you do are vital for a healthy lifestyle.
JUGGLING ACT
“My day starts with gym or a run at 9am. At noon, I’m either in a meeting at the 5FM studios, or in-studio with my producer. Otherwise, I’m at MTV doing voiceovers, shoots, checking emails or in meetings.” Fix also has a bulging after-hours diary. If she’s not at water polo practice, the gym or attending a social event, she’s brushing up her intellect at book club. But how does she keep track of what she has to do? “My morning run clears my mind and gets me ready for the day, and my multivitamins work like a charm! I’m also lucky to have my mother as my manager; she keeps me focussed.” Women are known for multi-tasking but, she says, “multi-tasking is like sport – if you keep practicing, you’ll get it right!”
THIRST FOR LIFE
Fix plays water polo and she’s brilliant at it! “I started swimming competitively in Botswana at the age of seven.” And at 13, as a high school pupil in East London, she was introduced to water polo. “The black girls at school couldn’t swim a full-length (25-metre) pool. So there I was, heading for the deep end, ready to show off my stroke. Our coach asked me three times if I was sure that I could swim a full length. I said, ‘yes, of course!’ I remember coming second and being cheered on by every black girl ever since!” Fix was selected for the national women’s team in matric, as well as the under-21 ladies’ side, which toured Australia and Sweden. “I was the first black female water polo player in the national team. This wasn’t easy: I was a brilliant player, but underestimated because of my race.” During her gap year in England, she coached water polo and played for the Coventry Girls team. Later she also played for the UCT first team. “Getting into the water has been difficult, owing to time constraints, but I’m lucky to be a member of a good water polo club in Johannesburg.” And, what does Fix do for fun and relaxation? “The people closest to me make life worth living. I also read, meditate or take a long bath. I really like my ‘me times’, which is probably why I live by myself.”
PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE
<< FIKILE ‘FIX’ MOETI
“I maintain a healthy food pattern, but one needs major discipline! Thank goodness I love keeping fit! I drink two litres of water every day, which keeps my skin healthy and glowing.” At the end of a long, busy day, Fix says she likes to reconnect with her spiritual side. “If you have peace within, you easily attract and give off positive energy.”
Look out for all five Woman In Action finalists in the September issue of TRUE LOVE!
TRUE LOVE Woman In Action in association with SANEX SKIN SMART! TOP TIPS FROM OUR SKIN COACH Fix leads a full life with her demanding profession as a video jockey and DJ. At the same time she also tries to fit in as much water polo training and game time as possible. With all the time she spends in the water, Fix realises that she needs a simple and easy skincare routine to get her through the day. We recommend she uses the Sanex dermo Active range of products, which inludes the shower and bath gel, hand wash and anti-perspirant roll-on. It is perfect for women who are serious about keeping their skin healthy, while staying at the top of their professional and sporting activities.
PHOTOGRAPHY Justin Dingwall MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi
The Sanex dermo Active range of skincare and personal care products offers dermatologically tested formulations that work hard for you, yet are still gentle on your skin. Like all products in the Sanex range, the formulations work with your skin, not just on it, to keep it healthy. The Sanex dermo Active Shower & Bath Gel is pH-balanced and soap-free, and won’t alter the natural balance of your skin. The Sanex dermo Active Anti-perspirant Roll-on formula responds to your body heat, offering 36-hour effective odour protection. The Sanex dermo Active range will help your skin to look great and feel healthy every day! The Sanex dermo Active range of products includes: ■ Dermo Active Shower & Bath Gel – contains active cleansers which help hydrate and refresh the skin. ■ Dermo Active Hand Wash – actively cleanses and refreshes. ■ Dermo Active Anti-perspirant Roll-on – for 36-hour protection that keeps working as your body temperature increases.
HOW YOU CAN BECOME A WINNER Over the past few months we brought you the finalists – from all fields of life and involved in many diverse sporting or fitness activities. You’ve read about each finalist and next month you can nominate who you think has what it takes to be our winner. If your nominee is the winner, you stand a chance to win R25 000 in cash, too! So, don’t miss a single issue of TRUE LOVE! This could be the start of a brilliant, healthier new you!
This year’s Sanex Woman In Action winner will receive R25 000 plus a SANEX hamper valued at R1 500, all courtesy of Sanex!
TRUE MOMENT
IN SERVICE OF... Helping those who are less fortunate is what inspires Tebogo Mashilwane to live her best life.
hen I open TRUE LOVE magazine the first articles I turn to are True Moment, Your Turn and In Her Shoes. These articles help me to learn more about myself and life. I am a 21-year-old woman and as a young girl I was always in charge and in control of my life. That was until I fell pregnant in Grade 12 in September 2005. Suddenly my life changed in ways I was not prepared for. The expected baby was my boyfriend Sifiso’s, who I had been with since 2003. Suddenly confusion set in; I was half-focussed on my work as the child inside me grew. Thank God I managed to pass matric, despite my pregnancy. Thando Bonolo is my lovely daughter’s name and having my child has allowed me to focus on the important things in life. But let me tell you now ladies, one of my a-ha moments was when I realised that having a child is no child’s play! Even though I love every minute of being a mother now, it was really difficult becoming a mother at the age of 18. I was blessed, though, to have a wonderful woman in my life – my mother helped me all the way. This August, as we celebrate
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Women’s Day, I thank God for such a wonderful woman because there are so many girls in my situation who do not have mothers to turn to for help. There are days when I feel helpless and weighed down, and I lose faith. Yet on other days I wake up and look forward to the challenges of life. Reading Nwabisa Zingelwa’s Your Turn in the May edition of TRUE LOVE also helped me. She reminded me of an old lesson I had learned – to accept myself and never give up on life. As an example of this, I remember how I encouraged my friend to start our own small business at school. We sold pies, small cakes and sandwiches. And even though some other ladies who also sold goods at the school were starting to hate us for taking away their business, we
SEND YOUR ARTICLE WITH A RECENT HEAD-ANDSHOULDERS PHOTO OF YOURSELF TO TRUE LOVE, ‘TRUE MOMENT’, PO BOX 784696, SANDTON 2146. Tebogo Mashilwane wins a fabulous TRUE LOVE Hamper comprised of a limited range of branded goodies, as well as a 12-month subscription to the magazine.
never gave up! And till today, knowing the power inside of me keeps me focussed and inspired. I co-own a waste recycling and projectmanagement company that is involved in helping my municipality with waste awareness amongst learners. I volunteer with the Department of Social Services, am active in youth politics, and I’m a student at Unisa. What keeps me going is constantly reminding myself what it is that I want and doing it through developing my village in Siyabuswa, Mpumalanga. I have realised that the world needs people who give back, who volunteer and who work together for the betterment of the community. I have big dreams – eventually I hope to have my own businesses in property development, communication and marketing. But for now I am helping the needy and loving it. My true moment has come in realising that in life you do not become rich in cash but through giving and helping those who are less fortunate. That is how one develops a legacy and writes one’s name in the books of history. ■
TRUE SPIRIT
POSTCARDS FROM THE EDGE Life’s blows can take us to the edge, but it is only through a willingness to heal, and by asking for help, that we avoid falling into the abyss below. By Iyanla Vanzant.
PHOTOGRAPH Infusion Radio
Dear Iyanla, I was molested 20 years ago by my mother’s then live-in boyfriend, who is now her husband. At 35, I told my mother what had happened and her reaction was surprising. She apologised, but she still lives with the man who stole my innocence. I wanted her to defend me, but she didn’t. For years she’s acted like a weak victim instead of the strong woman I always thought she was. How can I forgive her when I am still so hurt? Beloved, The closure you require begins with a conscious choice to heal. Start the process by choosing to give back to him the shame, guilt and anger forced upon you by the molestation. Write about it in a letter or journal, or speak it out loud each time you think about it. Then start seeing yourself as more than a victim by acknowledging and honouring your gifts and abilities. Forgive yourself for believing you did anything wrong and for allowing that belief to keep you silent for so long. Consider joining a support group for women who have had the same experience, or speak to a counsellor. Finally, forgive your mother for not knowing that you needed protection. Then imagine the perfect resolution: both of you healed and together. Be Blessed. Dear Iyanla, I’m a 45-year-old woman with an MBA and 20 years’ experience in the business world. I recently lost my job. My boss was younger than me and kept criticising and belittling me. My self-confidence is
low and I get extremely nervous when I have to go for job interviews. Iyanla, can you help me? Beloved, When a caterpillar dies, a butterfly is born! What you describe as a job loss could also be an opportunity to spread your wings. Let us begin by rewording what you call a job loss. First, start by acknowledging that being forced out of an abusive job was a blessing. And it would serve you well to consider why you would choose to give someone who has treated you poorly so much power over your life. Because energy follows thought; what you are thinking about yourself creates your reality. Believe it or not, it has absolutely nothing to do with how you were treated by someone who did not recognise your brilliance. Your departure is their loss! I encourage you to step out of the cocoon you have created by affirming who you are, rather than suffering because of whom you were not. If your selfconfidence is low, boost it by recognising the lessons you have learned in your past. Make a commitment to yourself not to accept or tolerate anything less than the respect and honour you know you deserve. And when you go for your next interview, remember who you are and be willing to share your true self with your prospective employer. Be Blessed.
Dear Iyanla, Is it just me, or is it difficult for everyone to find a spiritual home in a career? I started my work life as a hairdresser but found no fulfilment or higher purpose. Then I worked with disabled adults, and although the job brought a great sense of achievement, I was put off by abusive language and threatening behaviour. I felt really uneasy in that job. Now I am willing to start at the bottom of the ladder again, but I want to get it right this time. Do you have any suggestions? Beloved, The one thing missing in all your experiences is what you are not bringing to it. I encourage you to consider that your spiritual home is not a place or a position, but a state of being. From what you’ve shared, it sounds as if you are looking for a job to be a gift when the truth is, you are the gift. What’s the one thing you could do for the rest of your life, whether you get paid or not? How can you use your talents to make the world a better place and bring joy to others? Ponder these questions and come up with a 20-word statement that reveals who you are, what makes you feel good, and what you are good at doing? You will discover the purpose of your life and soon you’ll move into a work experience that will serve you and the world. Be Blessed.
Iyanla Vanzant is brought to you by INFUSION RADIO. Visit any of the following retail stores, Exclusive Books, selected Dis-Chem Pharmacies and CD Wherehouse to listen to and view some of Iyanla’s newest audio and reading material.
TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
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man of the moment
Ziggy Thabethe, co-owner of Sophiatown restaurant, tells Kemong Mopedi about the joy of owning an authentic African eatery in the heart of Newtown. hat sparked the idea of Sophiatown? My brother, Mzwandile, and I used to talk about owning a business that would preserve South African culture and where we could have people from all walks of life rejoicing under one roof. After a few brainstorming sessions, market research and an arduous financing process, Sophiatown opened its doors on 8 February 2007. Had it always been your dream to own a restaurant? Was it difficult? Mzwandile and I grew up in an entrepreneurial family, so we always knew we’d be self-employed. Our father was an informal trader; he sold jewellery and later other things. He used that same money to send us to private schools. Mzwandile left for London and I worked for Dimension Data, but I always knew that I was in transit. During my time there I sold clothes and became a “loan shark” because I had noticed that people didn’t have a culture of saving. I then bought a kombi and started transporting the Dimension Data staff. Mzwandile and I had 15 years of experience working as waiters, which
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came in very handy. Setting up Sophiatown also meant spending long hours learning the tricks of the trade. What kind of crowd does Sophiatown attract? It’s exactly the kind of market we had in mind when we were designing our menu. We have a basic home menu but we tried to cater for different tastes. We host everyone from yuppies, high-end politicians and tourists, to celebrities and BEE-types. It’s a mixture of hierarchies and we offer everyone comfort. You’re competing with hundreds of other eateries in Jo’burg; what makes Sophiatown the restaurant of choice? Our ambience is very special. There are many restaurants that serve African cuisine but ours is different in that we do not compromise our Africanness. We give people a sense of being home and touch their souls at the same time. What can we expect from Sophiatown in the future? The changes won’t be drastic but we will continue to take our service up a notch.
OFF THE CUFF
◆ I’m currently listening to Chris Stilo and Miles Davis. I do music compilations for Sophiatown so my taste in music is quite versatile. I listen to a lot of Afropop, like Siphokazi, Thandiswa Mazwai, Zim Nqawana and many others. ◆ My dream is to experience all that I’ve always wanted to. I’d like to get involved in various business projects, travel the world and meet new people. ◆ Good food must be healthy, prepared with passion and be enjoyed amongst people of good calibre. ◆ The world needs people who satisfy themselves and have a strong sense of worth. We need to support, respect and celebrate each other’s diversity. ◆ The most “mind-shifting” books that I’ve read are Fidel Castro’s My Life and Steve Biko’s I Write What I Like.
We will play around with the decor, just to keep the feel of the restaurant fresh. We have also established Ubuntu Brands, which serves as a holding company that regulates Sophiatown and Ko’Spotong (the dance pub next to the restaurant). The latter is already a franchise, and if the odds are stacked in our favour, we will definitely go international. Has the current credit crunch affected your business? We haven’t taken a dip at all; in fact, we are doing better than we were last year around this time. I don’t know if it’s a case of people drowning their sorrows (chuckles). Our clientele has been asking us to include a kids’ menu, expand our range of wines and offer more expensive cigars. We’re even looking into increasing our kitchen staff because we’re very busy.
PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch STYLIST Brains Tshabalala GROOMING Vuyo Varoyi CLOTHING Markham
FEEDING THE SOUL
FOXP2/854/SUPA
celebrity
I’M A DIVA ...that’s fine by me ariah Carey hit the big 40 in March, and how is she facing this milestone? With plastic surgery? No. Getting hitched to a younger man? Well, she’s already done that, having wed 27-year-old rapper and actor Nick Cannon last April, after a month of dating. Carey has another plan to fend off 40 fever, which brings to mind another multi-million album seller. Although clearly not as crackers as King of Pop Michael Jackson, Carey does have something of the Peter Pan complex
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about her. “I’m eternally 12. So I’ll be like, ‘okay, let’s celebrate the anniversary of being 12!’ Even when I was 20 years old, I thought that was like a million years old. So I don’t acknowledge birthdays.” It’s a dangerous game freezing your mindset to pre-teen level so that you can stay youthful, or at least feel it. Carey, though, is unlikely to take it as far as Wacko Jacko, “Getting older, I feel it’s about how you look and how you feel. If you feel old and rancid, then you’ll look like that. I say I’m eternally 12 because in this business you kind of don’t have to
grow up. To me it’s really about being as young as you feel and being a good person and true to who you are.” Her ethos has helped her maintain success as an artist, remaining relevant to young record buyers. Her 2005 album, The Emancipation Of Mimi, was the biggest selling album of that year in the United States (US). Her follow-up in 2008, E=MC² hasn’t fared as well but has still sold in excess of one million in the US alone and in April 2008 – a few days before her wedding celebrations – the album spawned her 18th number-one single, putting her ahead of Elvis and two behind the Beatles’ all-time record.
PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
Octave-jumping songbird Mariah Carey is oozing sex appeal and loving her life at the age of 40. Sofie Kyhl catches up with the multi-award winning star.
celebrity
Mariah and her husband Nick Cannon.
down, anti-glitter, if you like. “Lee Daniels, who produced Monster’s Ball and The Woodsman cast me in his movie Tennessee after seeing me in Wisegirls,” she reveals. “It’s a story about two brothers and I play the female who helps them get where they want to be. And then I’m in another film for a small, but very important role. In Tennessee I don’t look like myself. People didn’t know that I put on weight intentionally for the movie. I could just sit in the South and eat biscuits and do whatever I wanted… but then afterwards I went on a diet.”
‘If i feel like dressing up to go to church, i’ll dress up. if i feel like being in a sexy outfit in my video, i’ll do it!’
WHERE IT ALL STARTED
When she hit the big time in the early ’90s it was under the guidance of Tommy Mottola, whom she wed in 1993. Carey refers to the relationship as “very difficult, controlling and tough”. A decade after the divorce she’s still reeling, referring to the marriage on the song Side Effects from her latest album. No doubt she’s also referring to her ex-husband when she remarks that she “wasn’t allowed” to dress how she pleased. The fairytale elements of their story were overplayed – the way Mottola had plucked Carey from obscurity, propelled her to the top of the charts and built an extravagant love-nest for her. Yet it was true that Carey came from humble beginnings. Born in Huntingdon, Long Island, her father and mother divorced when she was three years old. Struggling to raise three children, her mother moved the family several times. She attended Harborsfields High School in Greenlawn where she earned herself the nickname Mirage. “It was one of my nicknames because I was never there,” she laughs. “I was working on my album.” After graduating in 1987, she moved to New York City, earning rent and food money at a beauty salon before Mottola took her on. “I have 500 hours of beauty school, I do!” she laughs. “Beauty school was pretty cool because you didn’t have to go to school for the whole day. You’d just go for half a day and then do your friends’ nails for the rest of the day. But
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it’s useful for my life now.” During her early years with Mottola, Mariah Carey, with her self-titled debut album and the four that followed, became a record-breaking pop giant, easily rivalling stars such as Whitney Houston and Madonna. But 2001 was to prove her lowest point. Record company and relationship problems ensued and she was reported to have suffered a breakdown, the signposts to which were quite public. Today, she pretty much denies it. “If a breakdown equals a really bad day, a really bad week, then yeah. I look at what some people do in public and I’m like: ‘I didn’t do freaking anything!’ And people went on a rampage about me having a breakdown and I’m just like, ‘okay that was part of what I had to endure for whatever reason’, maybe just to get me more grounded. Good came out of it and it obviously didn’t break me.” To make matters worse her movie career as a lead actress was virtually finished off for good, also in 2001, with Glitter. The film bombed, as did the soundtrack. She won a Worst Actress Razzie award the following year for her role in Glitter. Although her music career has been revived in recent years, Carey has not attempted to apply the same vigour to acting since. She is keeping to low-key projects but sounds excited by two upcoming movies and not in the least apprehensive. In both, she relished dressing
ON THE RISE AGAIN
Now a singer as well as an actress, not to be outdone by the likes of Britney Spears and Beyoncé, Carey also has her own perfume. “I did a fragrance last year and I worked on it myself. I’m not your average perfume buyer because I’m not really a fan of perfume,” she continues before correcting herself, “mine is one of the only perfumes I really like.” Carey also keeps busy with Camp Mariah just outside New York – so named in 1995 because of her work for the Fresh Air Fund. “I also work with the Make-AWish Foundation, which supports terminally ill children. Sometimes it’s just their wish to go to an award show or just get a call from me. It’s really tough to talk to people who are on their deathbed, especially when it’s children. But I keep it together because it’s not going to help them if I burst into tears.” Carey is often labelled a diva but not in the sense that she can’t keep control of her outbursts. Apparently she can be demanding when on tour or in hotels. Past demands have included red carpets being laid out, expensive candles in her dressing room, humidifiers around her bed and a dog chauffeur. More recently, she’s enjoyed sending up this image of herself and playing along with it. “If people think I’m being difficult, they’ve never met me or they don’t know what my job entails. Technically, if you look up the word diva, the first definition would be a talented female singer,” she adds, with a smile. “That’s a definition I knew my whole life because my mother is an opera singer and a diva is an opera singer. That’s fine by me.”
WORDS Celebritext PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/Wire Images
Keeping your youth onside is a tricky business in the industry. Madonna, who turned 50 this year, has been criticised for dressing too young and it’s an accusation that’s also been thrown at Carey. “I don’t care what people say. I’m going to wear what I feel like wearing when I feel like wearing it,” she sniffs, wearing a plain black dress, black high heels and, perhaps as a nod to her inner 12-year-old, rings adorned with butterflies. “When I started out I had one black dress and at one time I had one pair of shoes. And I wasn’t allowed to show my body. That made me rebellious for a while, but so what? If I feel like dressing up to go to church, I’ll dress up. If I feel like being in a sexy outfit in my video, I’ll do it! It’s my video.”
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HEY, MISS DJ!
Kaya FMâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Nonn Botha enthralls her listeners with her Celebrity Saturday radio show, which is testimony of her successful career. Tapping into her personal life, Mapula Nkosi finds out about her triumph over teenage pregnancy and her brotherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s death. 40
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onn Botha is an unusual name; how did it come about? My dad is a so-called “coloured” and my mom ke Motswana (speaks Setswana). My great-grandmother named me after the word “nun”; she was very Catholic. But my mom put her own spin on the Afrikaans version of the name and added an “n” to get Nonn. Botha is my father’s surname.
became a mom?
Tell us about being brought up by your great-aunt in the Vaal.
Yes, it does… I mean Auntie is the one who always remembers to ask me how I am and how I feel, whereas with my
Yes, she was just called Auntie by everyone and she was very fond of my mom. When my mom had to come and look for a job in Johannesburg, Auntie took on the job of raising me. I was originally born in Alexandra but I don’t remember that part of my life. And what are your earliest memories of that time?
We lived in Evaton in a very big yard. I remember running around in a field of pink flowers. I grew up with Auntie’s son, Jacky, who was two years older than me and we always played together. We lived a few streets away from my great-grandfather, who owned a general dealer store. I had the duty of selling newspapers.
I still call Auntie when I really need to talk or need some advice. A friend recently lost her child and it was the second child she had lost. If there is anyone who deserves to be a mom, it is she. I didn’t know what to say to make her feel better, so I called Auntie and she told me that sometimes you don’t have to say much, you just need to be there, and she was right. The way you relate to your mom, does that ever affect you negatively?
mom, I really get frustrated as there are times when I would like her to ask me that as well. When I recently had a car accident, my mom jokingly asked me if I was sober or drunk. When Auntie called me, she zoned in on my emotional needs and the first thing she asked me was if I was okay. I often look at it as having two mothers – the biological one and the one who raised me. That just means that it is more costly for me on Mother’s Day! (laughing) Auntie must be very proud of you right now, but how did she deal with you falling pregnant at the age of 17?
I think she was very hurt. I was young; it was my first love. But Auntie also gave me incredible support at the time. She told me; “You will dust yourself off and continue going to school.” So I went to school and wrote my matric while I was pregnant. What was it like being a pregnant teen?
I fell pregnant the very first time I had sex. I was this intelligent kid at school and had all these dreams for myself. Although I had incredible support, it was the most terrible time. Society was bad to me though, and some teachers made very hurtful remarks.
Your friends say you are an avid reader. Is that where your love for reading started?
Yes, definitely, Auntie used to make us read newspapers, even serious ones like the New Nation from when we were 12 years old. She was a nurse, very sophisticated and loved living the best life.
Did you try and take your own life?
So you never stayed with your mom?
Not exactly, my mom is more like my friend. I used to meet her in Johannesburg for shopping excursions at Truworths and to do our hair at the famous Alex hair salons. At one time when she separated from my dad, my mom joined us with my two younger sisters and brother, but I cannot say that she has been a mother figure to me. I used to steal her high heels and clothes from her closet. Has the relationship with your mom progressed into something different since you
‘I FELL PREGNANT THE VERY FIRST TIME I HAD SEX. ALTHOUGH I HAD INCREDIBLE SUPPORT, IT WAS THE MOST TERRIBLE TIME.’
Eya, ke ile ka nwa bleach (Yes, I drank bleach). I felt I had disappointed everybody. I did not know what I was going to do with a child. Despite my boyfriend at the time being okay with it and his mom promising to look after the baby once born, which she did, I was depressed. I bought the bleach at my great-grandfather’s shop,
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drank it and all I remember is waking up in Sebokeng Hospital.
the men I met, wondering if he would be married by now, have children, etc. So two years ago I went for therapy to talk about it. I still miss him.
How did you survive that dark period?
You are 30, single, with two kids and a demanding DJ job; how do you cope?
My family held a meeting and I realised how they all loved me and wanted to support me, so I started to motivate myself. I told myself that other people may talk about me, but the people who cared for me supported and loved me. That is when I found the strength to write my matric exams and I passed.
I have my older son Clinton, who is 12, and Gosiame, my little girl who is three years old. I have enormous guilt issues. There is this need to work for them and to fulfil your personal growth, but then you don’t spend enough time with your children while you are pursuing that. Having a boy is quite challenging; there was one incident at our housing complex recently that hurt me so badly.
Tell us briefly about your road to radio from there.
What happened?
An older boy was bullying my son and I went to confront him. He said to me: “haai umtwana wakho naye u (your child is) too soft.” Because every time they apparently tried to play rough or violent games, he would come back home. When things like this happen, you question yourself if your boy will be tough enough for the cruel world out there. And he has told me: “Mommy, please don’t get married; I don’t want a stepfather.”
‘i was angry, so angry with god. how could somebody with so much life die so young? he was murdered and we still do not know who did it.’
Tell me about your late brother, Jacky. How did his tragic passing affect you?
Jacky was born in 1977 and I was born in 1979. Our relationship was so close. He was shot in 1997 by unknown people on his way home from a nearby shop. It happened a few steps away from home. I was angry, so angry with God. How could somebody with so much life die so young? He was murdered and we still do not know who did it; did he owe them money or what? He was brutally killed. How could anyone have so much anger towards someone like Jacky? In this situation, do you find that the grief lingers when you cannot find closure
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about his murder?
Yes… and you know with us black people, we often don’t consider psychotherapy. During his death I had to be strong for Auntie. You know, even now when I am in the township, I still meet people who remind me about him. And when they see me, I remind them of Jacky because we always used to hang out together. How did you eventually deal with this loss?
It was after I had to read the message on his tombstone two-and-a-half years ago. The tombstone has his picture and when I read it, I finally broke down. I realised then that I had never dealt with this loss. The unveiling was supposed to be a happy time to celebrate his life, but I was just crying. Since his passing, I used to look out for characteristics of him in all
That’s a tall order?
Yes, it stems from the relationship I had with Gosiame’s father. I had introduced him to my son and I guess he also fell in love with him. He was also heartbroken when it ended. So, the plan is to be single for a while?
After my last relationship didn’t work out, my ego was hurt. Everyone will tell you how wonderful, beautiful, funny and kind you are, and you believe it and expect things to work out. Being a single mom with two children means that I have to date ko strateng (in the streets, away from my children), and that is hard.
PHOTOGRAPHY Justin Dingwall STYLIST Oratile Seabela MAKE-UP Adelaide Khosi Mthembu CLOTHING Jo Borkett SHOES Foschini
I went to AAA School of Advertising with the intention to study marketing, but advertising sounded really snazzy, so I ended up studying that. I started in radio after doing a course with veteran DJ Tony Blewitt. Seven years ago I got a job with Pick ‘n Pay radio and I still have a part-time stint there. I had been at corporate radio for a while when I started handling their drivetime slots… as in traffictrolley drive time! (raucous laughter) Right now I am doing their morning slot from 7.30am to 9.30am. I only joined Kaya FM three years ago.
COVER STORY
LOOK AT ME
! W NO
ooking at Miss Sophie Ndaba in a her fabulous purple Queen-character twinset, having come straight off the multi-award winning Generations set, it’s hard to imagine that this regal, bubbly and confident woman was once a tiny, skinny girl living in an orphanage in Zimbabwe, away from family, friends and even sometimes food! “The food often had cockroaches in it!” laughs Sophie. Even when she talks of those trying, poverty-stricken childhood days, there is not a hint of self-pity in her voice, just infectious laughter. “Children are amazing. I was so innocent; I don’t think I even minded that much being there. It was during that time that I developed an amazing relationship with God. That’s when I started having faith. One thing I always said: ‘Everyone is going to know who Sophie is one day!’” Little Sophie’s dreams were not the obvious Hollywood-actress ones. “I wanted to be a doctor or a social worker,” she smiles. Prophetic perhaps? For today what lies closest to Sophie’s heart is not the glitz and glamour of showbiz, but the Sophie Ndaba Foundation of Hope, which she established at the beginning of 2009. “Creating hope and doing acts of kindness to change children’s lives is what it’s all about. The wedding business is still going strong but I have really focussed all my energy on my Foundation. What I learnt growing up in the orphanage really helped me to establish the Foun-
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Sophie Ndaba has travelled a road that has reawakened her sense of ubuntu, urging her to bring hope and kindness to those less fortunate than her. Melinda Ferguson gets the story and comes away inspired. Photography by Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak.
dation,” she continues. “I really thought, ‘what did I need when I was growing up without anything?’ I remember an old man who used to come and give us a cake on our birthdays. It was so nice but if you ask most children who are growing up in poverty, they will say: ‘I want some shoes.’ So we are assessing needs, buying things children need and sponsoring children to attend school. I have a whole board of wonderful people who make decisions with me – doctors, lawyers, an economist and business people are all involved. I really have a desire to help people to change their lives.”
‘SNAP OUT OF IT’
It’s inspiring to see the new and revitalised Sophie. Not that long ago the newspapers were filled with stories of the divorce and indiscretions in her marriage to businessman and actor Themba Ndaba. It seems almost miraculous – this transformation of how invigorated and focussed Sophie is. “When you have challenges you have to sit down and face them head-on. I think
‘Creating hope and doing acts of kindness to change children’s lives is what it’s all about.’
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SOPHIE’S LOVE ADVICE “I would like to advise all women out there to make a list: Is he tall? Is he short? Successful? Does he run his own business? I want a man who will love me. In The Bible it is written ‘man love your woman more than you love yourself’ – not worship but really love you know.”
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many women tend to hide away. They go into a cocoon, feel sorry for themselves and become victims. We need to feel sorry for ourselves sometimes but ‘snap out of it!’ is my thing. Or you’re going to wallow in depression, go on medication, and lose the job and friends. I just knew I had to get up and step out of it. Of course, I had my chal-
In order to help her mother and family who were struggling, young Sophie became an ace strategist, sewing the seeds to become the amazing businesswoman she has turned out to be today. “I used to say to my mom, who was very ill when I was about 16 (Sophie was back home from the orphanage by this time), ‘just give me your R150 pen-
‘When you have challenges you have to sit down and face them head-on. I think many women tend to hide away.’ lenges but I made a decision to say, ‘I want to change my life for the better’. “One day I noticed the sun had come out and I realised, oh my gosh, there is a bit of mud out there ’cause there was a lot of rain, but how do I get past this mud and move forward to dry land? That’s when I started getting these amazing ideas on what I wanted to do.” And the million-dollar question on the tip of most people’s tongues is, how did Sophie actually do it? “I revisited the mistakes and looked at what I needed to learn,” explains Sophie. “I incorporated all the good and bad, and decided to move forward. I asked myself: who do I want to be 10 years from now? What do I want to achieve? Many things were born by asking these important questions. You cannot believe how I changed and excited I started becoming!” Oh yes, I can! I can literally see the light of excitement gleaming from Sophie’s eyes. I can hardly get a word in as she shares her story. “I believe, no matter what you go through, you make the decisions to say it’s time for a new me. And, of course, it doesn’t just happen like magic. Come on! It happens because you sit down and strategise. You know, Generations is my home and my stability, and I had to think forward and ask what more could I do? And say what is the best I can do to make me stand with my head held up high. So I went out there and started pursuing my dreams, strategising and making plans. “You know I had to go to the orphanage because my parents were ill and couldn’t afford to take care of me. But fortunately, by the time I was 16 I was back home with my mother.”
sion and I will make sure I double it, so we can survive. My mother trusted me with it. I asked myself, ‘what can I do to make cash?’ And I thought ‘modelling!’ Even though I wasn’t tall, I looked good and I could speak really good English. So I just walked into castings, pushed myself and it worked!” And oh boy, how it worked! “I became the mummy of the household and I still am to this day. I take care of the family,” says a proud Sophie. It’s strange how wrong one can be sometimes. To be honest, I didn’t really jump at the idea of Queen from Generations as the August cover story, representing a woman who would do justice to our all-important women’s month issue. our years ago I had done a Valentine’s story with her and now ex-husband and to be honest, she had not really impressed me. There had been a sadness and a withheld feeling about her. She just seemed a bit empty, even vacuous. Today, I am totally amazed at how wrong I was. “You know I was happy for a while but one day I realised this [marriage] is not for me. I am glad I made the decision to leave. Today I sit with an open spirit and mind;
l’m totally confident in the idea that I did the right thing leaving the marriage. The lessons one learn in times of pain are often far more valuable than the ones we learn when the road is easy and we are coasting unhindered and unchallenged.”
TAKE CARE OF YOUR MAN
The Dream Deferred is the name of former president Thabo Mbeki’s biography, and I ask her if she too feels as if her dream of a family and happy marriage has been deferred with the divorce? “You know I was married very young. I was 23. I had no idea. I didn’t sit down and say: ‘This is my dream life, this is my dream husband.’ I didn’t really know anything. I planned nothing; I only went with the flow. Of course, when I got married I was like: ‘Ooh everyone is going to see me getting married. All the girls who used to think I was nothing, they are going to see me being Mrs Somebody.’” I wonder out aloud that after a marriage fails, however hard one tries to justify it, there is a sense of failure in most of us, and we wonder how it went wrong and what part we had played in it. I ask Sophie if she agrees with me. “You know, people could easily say: ‘The man Sophie was married to frustrated her.’ Never! I probably frustrated him much more. I have learnt a lot from the break-up of my marriage. Today we have a good relationship. He is a good father and sees our son almost every second weekend.” Whatever happened in Sophie’s marriage, one thing’s for sure, she has walked away with a lot of wisdom. “I always advise women to take off their CEO jackets, welcome their man home, cook for him, wash his feet… make him want to come home. We forget how to treat our men and men get bored. I have many male friends and they say what leads them to stray from home, is boredom. They are not being taken care of. Women have to think, so remember to spoil your man even if you are spending his money.
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‘The question everyone in our office and I’m sure all you readers would love to ask is: “Is there a new sparkle of romantic interest in Sophie’s heart?”’
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STYLIST Mbali Soga STYLIST’S ASSISTANT Palesa Mahlaba HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi using Iman Cosmetics STOCKISTS Accessorize 011 884 4644); Dandelion (011 880 0106); Europa Art Shoes (011 883 6524); Kluk CGDT (083 377 7730); RJKay Creations (011 402 8867, www.rjkay.co.za <http://www.rjkay.co.za> ); Sass Diva (011 883 0918); Spitz (011 883 9610); Valentina Fashion Boutique 012 665 0247
“You wonder why he goes for some young girl dressed in sexy underwear. Women have to make much more effort. If you look at all the extra-marital affairs that are going down these days it’s because the women are fast asleep. I say: ‘Wake up! And don’t allow that girl to take over your home. Make sure you cater to your man.’ I was married, I know. You might get tired of just giving and giving but you have to find a way or you will lose him.”
‘I have great ideas for the kind of man I would like to have in my life. One thing I know, whatever happens, I will not die from love.’
IS THERE A MAN IN HER LIFE?
us, but we forget we are living in Africa and it’s about ubuntu here. We’re not like the European paparazzi. We should be living in a culture of respect yet sometimes the media go out of their way to destroy people for a headline. But as celebrities we need to understand the whole media thing. We need to know that they are out there and we can’t expect them not to write about us. But, on the other hand, we must be careful what we project ourselves.” Looking back on all that has come to pass in Sophie’s life, I ask her if she has any regrets lurking in the closet? “Oh no,” Sophie answers emphatically. “The marriage, the divorce, the pain and the tears have taught me to be me. And I thank Themba every day for this. The point is he taught me to mature; he taught me to grow up. I really know if I hadn’t gone through all this, I would not be half the person I am today. Throughout this interview there have
The question everyone in our office and I’m sure all you readers would love to ask is: “Is there a new sparkle of romantic interest in Sophie’s heart?” She laughs coyly. “I have great ideas for the kind of man I would like to have in my life. One thing I know, whatever happens, I will not die from love. If things don’t work out, I will move on. I’m going with the flow but the strategy is to plan! These days I’m aware of the decisions I make and the consequences. We often make decisions in a mood of excitement but we don’t look at the consequences.” So does she have an idea of who and what she is looking for in the love department? “Okay, I will tell you. I am looking to fall in love. I love being in love! I love to love. I don’t want to be alone. But I’m not in a hurry. I know for sure I am going to find my soulmate. I have made a list, because I am a woman of faith. I believe whatever we ask for will be done. I am patiently waiting.” ut surely there must be men falling over themselves to hook up with Sophie? Young, attractive and successful, although, possibly because of these qualities, men might find her a tad intimidating? “Yes, it’s hard. You go on a date with a classy, influential, successful guy and he’ll say: ‘My friends, meet Queen.’ And you think, ‘don’t you remember my name?’ And then you think, ‘okay, I need to revisit this.’ And then there’s the media who come up with fictitious stories about you. I’m at the point where I don’t give a damn. If I want to hug my friend in public, I am going to do it. If I want to go out to dinner with a guy, I am going to do it. If you live your life worrying about what journalists are going to write, then you will never do anything. “Look, we need the media and they need
b
been moments when Sophie’s strength and commitment have brought tears to my eyes. Her awesome positivity is infectious as is her sense of ubuntu and commitment to the betterment of other’s lives. “You know, a few years back I was feeling really bad; I was getting cramps in my back and neck. So I went to the doctor and he asked me: What is wrong? And I said, ‘how should I know, you’re the doctor, you figure it out!’ Then he said something that had a profound effect on me, life-changing in fact. “He asked: ‘Have you ever thought of doing things in your life that you are passionate about, things you really want to do? You are feeling stuff unconsciously and this is creating the pain.’ What this doctor said had a huge impact on me and I began to reassess my life. And look at me now.” Wow! Look at you now, Sophie, look at you now! n
QUEEN OF THE SMALL SCREEN
Having been on Generations from day one when they first called “cameras, rolling, action!” one can’t help but wonder how Sophie has managed to stay fresh and interested in the character of Queen.
“It’s an honour to still be on this show. The fact that Queen has so many fans still has made it really easy for me. And I’ve been able to stay interested because of this amazing character Queen. I believe as time goes by people often move on and find different things, but I have not found anything or anyone as amazing as this woman, Queen. Being on the show for so long is a confirmation of how powerful this character is.” We are all too aware of the fickle nature of soaps, and if a character is not liked or wanted, death, divorce or car accidents are a dime a dozen as ways used to get rid of unwanted or unpopular characters. It is a true test of Queen’s popularity with this soapie’s audience that she has managed to stay so central to the story for so many years. “If they didn’t like me I would have been on the chopping block. Remember, it’s all about ratings and popularity. If viewers don’t like you, you’re out. I have been lucky that they have loved Queen so much and for so long. Queen has helped me to get more expressive and outgoing, because Sophie is a very shy person and Queen has really taught me to express myself. She’s given me so much love and confidence in myself.”
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ebel r f o r the ause
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Mbali Soga rouses the fashionista in you with contrasting combinations of patent leather, sateen, velvet, lace and, lest we forget, metal hardware. Photography by Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak.
BLACK TUXEDO JACKET R990, WHITE RUFFLED BLOUSE R790, BOTH FROM JO BORKETT; BLACK SKINNY JEANS R199,95, EDGARS; BLACK LEATHER HEELS R999, ALDO; BLACK ANKLE SOCKS R29,95, FALKE AT FOSCHINI; BLACK CLUTCH PURSE R160, TRUWORTHS; LARGE EARRINGS R69,95, SASS DIVA.
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LEATHER BIKER JACKET R2 800, FASHION DEPOT; LEOPARD PRINT VEST R290, JO BORKETT; GREY SKINNY JEANS R650, ZERO DEGREES; BLACK RUCHED BOOTS R1 999 ALDO; MULTI-STRAND NECKLACE FROM R499, MIGLIO; LIGHT-GREY CHAIN MAIL BAG R299, QUEUE; STUD EARRINGS R59,95, SASS DIVA.
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GREY BOYFRIEND CARDIGAN R690, PRINTED T-SHIRT R790, BOTH FROM JO BORKETT; BLACK SKINNY JEANS R499, BLACK CLUTCH BAG R299, BOTH FROM SISSY BOY; MULTISTRAND NECKLACE R199,95, SILVER CUFF BRACELET R79,95, BLACK BRACELETS R59,95, ALL FROM SASS DIVA; STUD EARRINGS R29,95, EDGARS.
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PRINTED T-SHIRT R390, FASHION DEPOT; BLACK BOYFRIEND CARDIGAN R690, JO BORKETT; BLACK LEGGINGS R339,95, BLACK CHAIN MAIL BAG R239,95, BLACK ANKLE BOOTS R299,45, ALL FROM RAGE; BLACK AND WHITE SCARF R39,95, MR PRICE; CHAIN MAIL BRACELET R144,95, SASS DIVA; BLACK CUFF BRACELETS R59,99 EACH, SISSY BOY; STUD EARRINGS R29,95, EDGARS.
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BLACK AND GREY STRIPED T-SHIRT R400, SISSY BOY; BLACK AND GREY JACKET R660, FLAVOURS BOUTIQUE; WHITE-WASHED JEANS R299,95, OBR AT TRUWORTHS; SILVER BRACELETS R159,95, EARRINGS R69,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA; BLACK HEELS R999, ALDO.
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BLACK T-SHIRT R149,95, EDGARS; RED CARDIGAN R690, JO BORKETT; BLACK BEADED NECKLACE R179,95, BLACK CUFF BRACELET R59,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA; CHAIN MAIL NECKLACE R499, MIGLIO; BLACK STOCKINGS R39,95, WOOLWORTHS; TARTAN SKIRT R319,95, BLACK PATENT BOOTS R499, BOTH FROM RAGE.
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HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi MODEL Taryn from Heads STOCKISTS Aldo (011 555 2300) Fashion Depot (011 883 8981) Flavours Boutique (084 823 3852) Foschini (021 938 1911) Jo Borkett (011 883 7240) Mr Price (0800 21 25 35) Rage (011 883 7502) Sass Diva (011 883 0918) Sissy Boy (021 442 9400) Truworths (021 460 2300) Woolworths (0860 100 987) Zero Degrees (011 783 5611)
WHITE RUFFLED BLOUSE R490, JO BORKETT; BLACK CORD WAISTCOAT R799, SISSY BOY; BRACELETS FROM R79,95, SASS DIVA; BLACK SATEEN PANTS R119, MR PRICE; STUD EARRINGS R29,95, EDGARS.
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F A S H I O N M U S T- H AV E S
FREEZE FRAME
Winter is looking up with bold, coloured spectacle frames to accessorise any look. By Mbali Soga.
BLUE AND GREEN FRAMES R1 600.
RED AND BLACK FRAMES R270.
SKY BLUE FRAMES R450. TANGERINE/ORANGE FRAMES R800.
BLACK AND RED FRAMES R480.
‘Do not expect the world to look bright, if you habitually wear graybrown glasses.’
— Charles W. Eliot
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LIME AND PURPLE FRAMES R750. HOT PINK FRAMES R 1 600.
PHOTOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak STOCKISTS Zena Jacobson Optometrist 011 784 0754/5/6; www.zenoptom.co.za
SHOCKING PURPLE FRAMES R1 300.
KINGJAMES 16240
FA S H I O N N E W S
CAPE TOWN
SNEAK PEAK
Mango’s Spring/Summer ’09 range is billed to be as beautiful as ever and with the theme “A Playground of Dreams” you’ll be able to make your wildest dreams come true. The collection is inspired by everything from nature to modern architecture, and be sure to look out for various pants styles, from high-waisted ones to carrot legs.
FASHION WEEK
Fashion fever will be docking in the Mother City again when the prestigious Cape Town Fashion Week takes to the ramp. This seasonal event will take place from 19 July to 2 August this year where Mzansi’s crème de la crème will showcase their Spring/Summer ’09 collections. Look out for Peacemaker Hilso’s Goats’ collection!
t
LOUIS VUITTON REVAMP
he artist Takashi Murakami has designed a digital animation titled Superflat First Love, which stages the itinerary of Takashi Murakami’s young heroine, Aya, by picturing her meeting with Gaston Louis Vuitton, the emblematic character of the third generation of the Vuitton family. For this occasion, Louis Vuitton reinterprets his emblematic wallet by adding a juicy colour touch to the monogram canvas. This design is a definite thumbs-up to Murakami animation. To view the animation, visit www.louisvuitton.com.
A GRAND GESTURE
FABIANI FOR CHARITY
What would fashion be without those humble souls who give back to their communities? Fabiani has been running the Last Red Button Hole Project since 2008, where a donation is made to the Children’s Hospital Trust, the fundraising arm of the Red Cross War Memorial Children’s Hospital, with every shirt sold. The funds go towards purchasing life-saving equipment and a new operating theatre complex at the War Memorial Children’s Hospital in Rondebosch, Cape Town. Big ups to Fabiani and their cause!
THE CHAMPAGNE CAMPAIGN
Charles Greig and LVMH Champagne recently launched Collections de Luxe designed as a tribute to the glamour and luxury that champagne personifies. The collection of fine jewellery perfectly captures the essence of the champagne houses, Moët et Chandon’s fabulous celebration; Veuve Clicquot’s daring design; Dom Pérignon’s iconic luxury; Krug’s bespoke craftsmanship, and Ruinart’s refined heritage. The Collections de Luxe can be viewed at Charles Greig stores in Hyde Park, Sandton City and the Michelangelo Hotel in Jo’burg, V&A Waterfront in Cape Town, Brooklyn Mall in Pretoria and The Palace at Sun City.
WORDS Mbali Soga
Cape Town has always been the ultimate South African destination for lazy days and lots of shopping. In keeping with this, The Grand has just opened its doors behind The Grand Café in Camps Bay. The shop houses everything from St Tropez resort wear and homeware, to quirky gifting ideas. After a Zen shopping experience you can waltz into The Grand Café next door for a light lunch, sexy sundowners or a dinner date to remember.
FA S H I O N L E S S O N PERFECT IN PEARLS Never out of date, pearls (the way late Princess Diana used to wear them) are still a fashion accessory staple. Revisit the past with a trio of pearl earrings, bangles and necklaces.
HIT ’EM WITH BLACK HEELS Every woman needs a pair of black heels in which they can strut their stuff. Get the vintage variations in exotic animal skins or platform heels.
GO VINTAGE Curb the splurge and rummage through your mother’s closet for her timeless fashion treasures, advises Mbali Soga.
TARTAN TRIP If you thought tartan was a new trend, think again! Trawl through bargain bins for those two-piece skirt and suit jacket ensembles or go ’70s in a retro tartan shift dress à la Twiggy
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BAG IT! Daytime: Framed handbags are extremely hot now, just like they were decades ago. These bags were so labour-intensive to manufacture then that they are sure to have survived the years. Night-time: An evening bag to complement your look is often overlooked. These are easy to find in second-hand shops. Update it by adding brooches or spraying it with daring metallic colours.
BELT ON THE BEAT Nothing glams up or instantly updates a look like a belt. Go for leather belts with ornamental buckles to spruce up longer-length T-shirts and denims, or go to town with chunky metallic belts with your classic little black dress.
FAVOURITE VINTAGE HAUNTS Bandile 083 770 5303 Green Sleeves 021 425 3112 Never on a Sunday 021 481 1820 Reminiscene 011 726 7905 The Salvation Army 011 435 0267/8
PHOTOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak
PATENT POTION Did you ever think patent leather would make a comeback? It has! Throw a patent leather jacket over a pair of leggings and a polo neck and finish off the look with a pair of riding boots and plenty of metallic jewellery. In 2009 this look is called “rebel” or “rock chic”!
F A S H I O N / 1 T R E N D 3 W AY S
THE TREND: FORMAL BLAZER
TRAILBLAZER SMART CASUAL
GREY PINSTRIPE BLAZER R1 499,95, MANGO; BLACK TUXEDO SHIRT R950, FLAVOURS BOUTIQUE; BLACK JEANS R599, GUESS; BLACK LEATHER BAG R1 249, COUNTRY ROAD AT WOOLWORTHS; EMBOSSED STACK BRACELET R129,95, DIAMOND EARRINGS R99,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA.
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PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi MODEL Miranda S from O Model Management; STOCKISTS Accessorize (021 447 7718) Aldo (011 555 2300) Edgars (0860 692 274) Jo Borkett (011 883 7240) Mango (011 555 7300) Mr Price (0800 212535) Nine West (011 555 2300) Rage (011 444 1282)
Known to be a formal wear fashion staple, blazers are making a versatile statement these days. Mbali Soga shows you how it’s done.
PHOTOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak HAIR and MAKE-UP Prudence Segami MODEL Phumzi from Heads STOCKISTS Flavours Boutique (076 080 1524) Foschini (021 938 1911) Guess (011 555 2300) Jo Borkett 011 883 7240 Miglio (021 851 6055) Mr Price (0800 21 25 35) Sass Diva (011 883 0918) Sissy Boy (021 442 9400) Spitz (0860 109 321), Truworths (021 460 2300) Woolworths (0860 100 987)
ROCK-STAR CHIC
BLACK TUXEDO BLAZER R400, FOSCHINI; WHITE STATEMENT T-SHIRT R399, GUESS; BLACK SKINNY JEANS R499, SISSY BOY; BLACK PATENT HEELS R1 095, GEOX AT SPITZ; SILVER STUD EARRINGS R99,95, SILVER STACK BRACELET R49,95, PEARL AND DIAMOND STRAND BRACELET R129,95, SILVER MULTI-STRAND NECKLACE R199,95, ALL FROM SASS DIVA, BLACK PATENT SLING BAG R1 890, JO BORKETT.
FEMININE WILES
BLACK BLAZER R129,95, MR PRICE; GREY SHIFT DRESS R890, JO BORKETT; BLACK STOCKINGS R34,95 FALKE AT FOSCHINI; BLACK SNAKESKIN ROUND-TOE HEELS R350, TRUWORTHS; PEARL BRACELET R64,95, PEARL EARRINGS R99,95, BOTH FROM FROM SASS DIVA PEARL NECKLACE R499, MIGLIO .
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REAL WOMAN
Pearl Mbatha, 27, is a sales consultant from KwaZulu-Natal and a self-confessed shopaholic, but says she finds winter clothing shopping dull. Mbali Soga shows her how to rejuvenate her dreary wardrobe with this season’s hottest shades of berry – from deep purples to bright cherries.
STYLE TIP: Ruffle some feathers by matching a beautiful purple ruffled shirt with a pair of high-waist, wide-leg pants. HIGH-WAIST PANTS R690, JO BORKETT; PURPLE RUFFLED BLOUSE R499, FASHION DEPOT; BURGUNDY PATENT HEELS R275, RAGE; GOLD AND PURPLE STACK BRACELETS R164,65, GOLD HOOP EARRINGS R59,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA.
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STYLE TIP: Garments in fabulous prints are a winner while you brave the wintry August weather. PRINTED SMOCK DRESS R409,95, RAGE; TAN BAG R2 590, JO BORKETT; BROWN STACK HEEL BOOTS R1 695, SPITZ; GOLD BANGLE R149,95, DROP EARRINGS R64,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA; CHOCOLATE FOOTLESS TIGHTS R39,95, FALKE AT FOSCHINI.
PHOTOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak HAIR and MAKE-UP Prudence Segami STOCKISTS Fashion Depot (011 883 8981) Foschini (021 938 1911) Guess (011 555 2300) Jo Borkett (011 883 7240) Mr Price (0800 21 25 35) Rage (011 883 7502) Sass Diva (011 883 0918) Sissy Boy (021 442 9400) Spitz (0860 109 321) Truworths (021 460 2300) Woolworths (0860 100 987) Zero Degrees (011 783 5611)
HELP!
STYLE TIP: The layered look is still a firm favourite, but go for bright colours that will give you a warm glow and keep you toasty. RED LONG-SLEEVE T-SHIRT R350, GREY COAT R1 200, BOTH FROM ZERO DEGREES; MARLED PINK KNIT DRESS R450, FASHION DEPOT; WHITE STOCKINGS R39,95, FALKE AT FOSCHINI; RED KNEE-LENGTH BOOTS R355 RAGE; SILVER EARRINGS R94,95, SASS DIVA.
STYLE TIP: Throw caution to the wind and experiment with bold colour combinations – the brighter, the better!
DO YOU WANT TO BE A TRUE LOVE REAL WOMAN?
PURPLE KNIT DRESS R450, ZERO DEGREES; ROSE PINK COAT R799, FASHION DEPOT; TURQUOISE STOCKINGS R34,95, FALKE AT FOSCHINI; TAN BOOTS R1 599, COUNTRY ROAD AT WOOLWORTHS; COLOURED BRACELETS R69,95, LARGE HOOP EARRINGS R64,95, BOTH FROM SASS DIVA.
Please send coupon in an envelope with a recent photo of yourself to: Fashion Editor, TRUE LOVE, PO Box 784696, Sandton 2146, or email fashion@truelove.co.za.
Name: ................................................................................ Age: ............................ Dress size: .................................... Height: .......................... Tel no: ........................................ Cell no: ..................................................
beauty
External
youth
Ayanda Bikitsha brings you a range of anti-ageing solutions so extensive, that they leave no excuse for you to live in a skin that shows signs of premature ageing! Photography by Nadette Clare-Talbot.
ge is a major concern for most of us and women of colour are, now more than ever, going the extra mile in their pursuit of a younger looking skin. The list is endless when it comes to anti-ageing products, treatments and procedures, which help to firm sagging skin, brighten dull complexions, and minimise or eliminate lines and wrinkles. Take a look at some of the more popular options available to help you prevent and fight the signs of premature ageing.
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BEAUTY
SPA TREATMENTS Beauty salons and spas offer a variety of anti-ageing facials and treatments. Camelot Spa’s anti-ageing offerings include Wrinkle Control Fundamental Double Mask Facial for R945. This “wrinkleby-wrinkle” cosmetic procedure involves an expert mask, which uses sterile strips to treat each wrinkle. After 90 minutes, a more youthful appearance is revealed. Placécol Beauty Centres offer Micro Derma Laser, which is very effective in the treatment of fine lines and wrinkles. Micro Derma Abrasion is used by most beauty salons and spas for the application of corundum powder to the skin, which resurfaces the skin, revealing
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a radiant complexion. Placécol has developed its own application, Micro Derma Laser, which uses the traditional abrasion technique as the basis of the treatment, but further enhances results by following it up with the Placécol Soft Laser Treatment to aid in even better cell growth. Expect to pay around R395 for a 60-mininute treatment. Anti-ageing specialist Penny Rose says, “The best route to a youthful complexion is through peeling. It reduces the appearance of fine lines by speeding up cell-turnover, while stimulating collagen production and improving skin firmness. To experience Penny’s amazing peels for R650, call 011 880 5052.
HOME CARE
At-home exfoliants such as cleansers, toners and lotions that contain retinol or fruit acids, as well as prescription retinoid, glycolic acid or salicylic acid, help reveal a youngerlooking skin. Night creams with collagenstimulating ingredients such as peptides and retinoid also prevent the formation of lines and wrinkles. Products that contain ingredients such as anti-hydroxy acids, hyaluronic acids and marine collagens are also effective in delaying the ageing process. Using products that contain high levels of green tea, omega-3, and vitamins A, C and D will also help to slow down signs of ageing. Green tea helps to protect against DNA damage caused by the sun, while Vitamin C prevents and repairs some signs of ageing through its role in the metabolism of collagen. Antioxidants from fruits and vegetables help protect the skin from damage. Pomegranate is well known for strengthening cell membranes, making them less susceptible to damage and moisture loss. The most effective anti-ageing products are those offering protection from the sunâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s damaging rays, so invest in products with a 15 or higher protection factor.
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BEAUTY
THE SURGICAL OPTION Those looking for a more permanent option could choose a facelift. This surgical procedure is done to improve sagging facial skin, and the results may last for several years. During a facelift surgical procedure, excess fat is removed, while facial muscles are tightened and the skin re-draped on the face and neck. Surgeons use different procedures but, generally, the incision usually begins above the hairline at the temples, extending in a line in front of the ears and continuing below the earlobes to the lower scalp. The procedure usually takes several hours to complete and is performed under local or general anaesthetic (a sedative is usually required with local anaesthesia). Expect temporary bruising, puffiness, swelling, numbness and tenderness of the skin, with downtime of two weeks. The surgery will set you back in the region of R47 000. For more information, call 021 782 2136 or 011 880 5122.
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HAIR and MAKE-UP Faith Seuoe MODEL Debbie from Tribe Models
BEAUTY
NON-INVASIVE PROCEDURES Laser therapy is one of the most popular procedures for treating ageing skin, as it immediately smoothes out wrinkles by re-surfacing the skin. Laser therapy uses a safe infrared light to heat the dermis, causing immediate collagen contraction, resulting in tighter skin. Expect gradual improvement over a three-to-six month period as new collagen is formed and the skin tightens. Laser therapy costs in the region of R750 per area, depending on the skin area and type. For more information, visit www.laserderm.co.za.
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Botox is fast becoming the preferred non-invasive cosmetic procedure for subtly tackling deep lines and wrinkles. This short-term yet visibly effective solution involves muscle relaxants being injected under the skin by a qualified doctor, which freeze the muscles around the eyes and mouth that cause lines. The treatment takes about 15 minutes and costs around R60 per unit, which may add up to about R1 200. Expect visible results within two to seven days, which may last for about four months. For more information, we recommend you call the Sandton Aesthetic Institute on 011 883 3116.
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BEAUTY NEWS
VUYO’S NO-DEO DIARY TRUE LOVE Web Editor Vuyo Lutseke took up the challenge of foregoing her deodorant for four days and diarising this experience. As a natural part of her routine, she found it very difficult and here she explains why.
SISTERS, TREAT YOURSELVES! n celebration of Woman’s Day this month, treat those phenomenal women in your life with a pamper day at Mangwanani African Day Spa. Voted Spa of the Year for seven consecutive years makes this haven of tranquillity and indulgence the ultimate treat to relieve stress and rejuvenate the soul. To locate your nearest spa, call 0860 55 00 55.
dation tha
u
A foun ake-up? Yo Clarins recently introduced d to wear m e e n e th amazing three cleansers that are it! Clinique’s better believe keup SPF 15 not only gentle on your skin and Ma provide more effective in tone. This Even Better o corrects sk undation ls a ut b s, cleansing. Retailing for n fo eve oil-free liquid R240 each, the Gentle lightweight, discolouration, while Foaming Cleansers were visibly treats autiful coverage. launched in three variations providing be 2 shades, this 1 including the Gentle Foaming Available in retails for n tio Cleanser with Shea Butter a d un fo (for dry or sensitive skin); Gentle R250. Foaming Cleanser with Cottonseed (for normal to combination skin), and Gentle Foaming Cleanser with Tamarind and Micro Pearls (for combination to oily skin). Make your way to the nearest Clarins beauty counter and find one that suits your skin.
FRESH & SEDUCTIVE
Women who love delicate scents will enjoy Bulgari Jasmin Noir Eau de Toilette with lotus flower, scintillating sap and white musk. At R550 for 30ml, this fresh and delicate scent releases more seductive notes towards the evening, which makes it the perfect choice when you have to dash from the office to a dinner date.
BEAUTY TIP
Longing for luscious, long lashes? Visit your nearest Red Square for the Model Co. Fibre Lash Brush on Lashes for R340, which extends and builds your lashes to extreme length, giving the impression of instant fake lashes!
*ASK AYANDA
Do you have any niggling beauty-related queries? Send your questions to TRUE LOVE Beauty Editor, Ayanda Bikitsha, at beauty@truelove.co.za. We will not only answer your questions, but also feature them in the magazine.
WORDS Ayanda Bikitsha, Vuyo Lutseke PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch
GENTLE CLEANSING
BEAUTY K s ED’S t PeveIC ntually erase
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BEAUTY ESSENTIALS
LL/SNF/649/E
STOP THE CLOCK! Keep the effects of ageing at bay with products that deliver youthful, glowing skin. By Ayanda Bikitsha.
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Lancôme Renergie Morpholift Nuit Overnight Repositioning and Firming Cream R965. Beauty Ed’s Pick: Eyliplex-2 is a 2-in-1 fast-acting eye lift & dark-circle reducer R395, for both day and night. Clarins Extra-Firming Tightening Lift Botanical Serum R610.
TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
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Revlon Age Defying Skin Smoothing Powder R195. Estée Lauder Re-Nutriv Ultimate Youth Crème 30ml, R1 450. Clinique Repairwear Intensive Eye Cream R350. L’Oréal Derma Genesis Intensive Night Cream R169,95.
Dior Capture Totale Haute Nutrition Multi-Perfection Rich Crème R1 675. 9. Garnier UltraLift Pro-X Roll-on R154,95. 10. ROC Retin-Ox Wrinkle Filler Day & Night R345. 8.
PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch
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BEAUTY ESSENTIALS
LL/SNF/649/E
STOP THE CLOCK! Keep the effects of ageing at bay with products that deliver youthful, glowing skin. By Ayanda Bikitsha.
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Lancôme Renergie Morpholift Nuit Overnight Repositioning and Firming Cream R965. Beauty Ed’s Pick: Eyliplex-2 is a 2-in-1 fast-acting eye lift & dark-circle reducer R395, for both day and night. Clarins Extra-Firming Tightening Lift Botanical Serum R610.
TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
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Revlon Age Defying Skin Smoothing Powder R195. Estée Lauder Re-Nutriv Ultimate Youth Crème 30ml, R1 450. Clinique Repairwear Intensive Eye Cream R350. L’Oréal Derma Genesis Intensive Night Cream R169,95.
Dior Capture Totale Haute Nutrition Multi-Perfection Rich Crème R1 675. 9. Garnier UltraLift Pro-X Roll-on R154,95. 10. ROC Retin-Ox Wrinkle Filler Day & Night R345. 8.
PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch
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BEAUTY ED’S PICK
Give natural styles the tre they deserve with Hairsa atment vvy Natural Braid and Dreadlock ha ir care range. Moisture-rich with olive oil, the range includes Spray-on Braid and Dreadlock Shampoo R20,09, and is excellent for treating dandruff an d an itchy scalp while stimulating hair growth. For information about you r nearest stockist, call 011 805 2995.
COIFFED KIDS
Many mothers choose to braid their children’s hair during winter, so make sure your little one’s braids look good with African Pride Dream Kids Soothing Braid Spray. Specially formulated for delicate hair and sensitive scalps, the spray soothes, moisturises and adds sheen. Use it after braiding and as a daily moisturiser.
HAIR FLAIR
Running out of hairstyle ideas? Use a funky hair clamp to lift your hair from the back, adding height to your style and creating a funky up-do. This Brown and Pink Printed Hair Clamp is available at selected Clicks stores for R16,99.
*ASK AYANDA
L’ORÉAL STEALS THE SHOW
With votes recently cast by consumers and professional judges alike, L’Oréal Paris hair products have been awarded the prestigious title of Product Of The Year! In the hairstyling category, their Studio Line Indestructible Glue R59,95, won the coveted title, whilst the Elvive Nutrigloss Masque nabbed the award in the hair treatment category.
HAIR TIP
Make Leave-in Conditioners your bes during cold winter months, when hai t friend r is likely to become drier and brittle.
STYLE OF THE MONTH
n recent months, Lace-front Wigs have gained popularity, thanks to celebrities such as Beyoncé and Tyra Banks. This fullhead wig is attached on a fine lace base to create a lighter, more breathable cap and give a more natural and realistic flow. Retailing from around R6 000, these wigs will transform any hairstyle, regardless of length, into a full head of flowing tresses in an instant. Top salons have started adding lace-front wigs to their product list and services, too. “The design of these wigs gives you more flexibility and control than traditional weaves,” says Kayser Sibisi of Saxon Hair Studio. By attaching it to the hairline, you have the choice of changing your style to a ponytail, a bun and even venture into the pool without fear of the wig coming off. For more information, call 082 585 7459.
Do you have any niggling hair-care queries? Send your questions to TRUE LOVE Beauty Editor, Ayanda Bikitsha, at beauty@truelove.co.za. Not only will she answer your questions, but also feature them in our beauty pages.
WORDS Ayanda Bikitsha PHOTOGRAPHS Pierre van den Bosch; Gallo Images/Film Magic
HAIR NEWS
PROMOTION
HIGHLIGHTS TO DYE FOR The INECTO Plus HighLights Hair Colour Kit with special applicator brush has been specially formulated to give naturally dark hair an exciting colour burst in one application. vailable in Blonde/ Brown and Red, the INECTO Plus High-Lights Hair Colour Kit with its special applicator brush works best on hair that has not been recently coloured with black or dark brown hair dyes. If you have used one of these hair colours, we recommend that you wait until the existing colour has grown out before applying one of the INECTO Colours. With 32 tried and trusted shades, INECTO is the leading hair colourant in Africa.
COPYWRITER Hayden Horner PHOTOGRAPHY Nick Boulton HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi MODEL Valencia Nkomo
INECTOâ&#x20AC;Ś Colour With Confidence!
EASY DOES IT
Adding stunning highlights to your crowning glory is a breeze with the INECTO Plus High-Lights Hair Colour Kit. Follow these simple instructions for salon-perfect highlights every time: 1. 2. 3.
Select the strands of hair you wish to highlight. Using the special applicator brush, apply evenly to the selected hair. Rinse hair after 30 minutes for subtle colour, or 45 minutes for vivid colour.
For more information, call 0860 INECTO or 0860 463 286, or visit www.inecto.co.za.
BEAUTY MAKEOVER
HELP! Bonisiwe Khumalo,
27, is job-hunting and says she needs a professional look to convince prospective employers that she is the ideal candidate to employ. Ayanda Bikitsha transforms her into a chic career girl.
BEFORE
HAIR IN FOUR QUICK STEPS Step 1: To create this stunning hairstyle, start by blow-drying the hair straight.
Step 2: Plait the hair from the back of the neck up towards the crown and secure it with a hairpin.
Step 3: Using a fine-tooth comb, tease the hair at the front to create volume, then use a wide-tooth comb to create height, and secure this section of the hair with a hairpin at the crown.
MAKE-UP IN SIX EASY STEPS Step 1: Apply liquid foundation to create an even skin tone. Step 2: Brush on loose, translucent powder with a large
powder brush, which will help the foundation set and create a matte finish. Yardley Loose Powder Absolute Translucent costs R84,95, and is great for all skin tones.
Step 3: Tweeze the eyebrows to create a neat shape. Tweezing helps to “open up” the eyes, as low brows can make the eyes appear droopy.
AFTER onisiwe hails from Newcastle in KwaZuluNatal and lives with her mom, brothers and 18-month old son. She is hoping to secure a job as a call centre agent, but while she is constantly searching for a job she also loves to listen to music and watch her favourite television programme, Rhythm City. “I go for interviews on a regular basis and I think a professional makeover will increase my chances of landing that dream job,” she says.
Step 4: Accentuate and open up small eyes by using a
highlighter colour such as vanilla on the inside corners of the eyes and brow bone, and complete with a plum eyeshadow on the crease for definition. Finish off the eyes with a coat of black mascara and eyeliner. To soften the effect of the black eyeliner, use a small brush to apply plum eyeshadow along the upper and lower lids.
Step 5: For a warm glow to the cheeks, use a blusher brush to apply an apricot-peachy blusher to the apples of the cheeks.
Step 6: Line the lips with a plum lipliner and seal the look with a slick of pink tinted lipgloss.
WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE A BEAUTY MAKEOVER CANDIDATE? Name: ....................................................................... Age: ............... My beauty concern: ..................................................... ............................................................................................. Tel no: .................................... Cell no: .................................... Want to be involved in a Beauty Makeover? Please complete the coupon and send it, along with a recent picture of yourself, to The Beauty Editor, TRUE LOVE, PO Box 784696, Sandton 2146, or email beauty@truelove.co.za.
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PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch HAIR and MAKE-UP Prudence Segami CLOTHING Fashion Depot ACCESSORIES Sass Diva
Step 4: Seal the look with holding spray to ensure the style lasts longer. Sofn’free Spritzz-It retails for R26,16, and will do the trick.
life is beautiful
MANKOANA CHAKELA, Owner of Le Looks Beauty and Hair Salons “I enjoyed turning 40 because I became really content with myself. I was more comfortable with my life. I became more inspired to live life to the full, which made me happier. I am looking forward to being 90, because my family has a history of having a long life span. My grandmother died at the age of 95, and even at that age, she was very strong and healthy. She was so happy and content, and I’m looking forward to living my life like her.” Mankoana is 51 years old.
IT’S JUST A
NUMBER! Nonhlanhla Khumalo speaks to four women who embrace their respective ages by living their lives with passion and determination. 90
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HEATHER MHLONGO, Financial Director and co-owner of Black Steer Holdings “Turning 40 was significant because it gave me the opportunity to reflect on my life holistically and identify my true passion in life. At the age of 41 I’m living my dream and I am happy and more content. I’m looking forward to my 60s, as I believe I will have achieved my ultimate goals to empower underprivileged women and children, and build my legacy.” Heather is 41 years old.
‘it gave me the opportunity to reflect on my life holistically and identify my true passion in life... I’m living my dream and I am happy and more content.’
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life is beautiful
‘each year i look forward to the challenges that growing older has in store for me. I smile because each birthday brings out a more mature and wiser lady in me.’
AYANDA KUBHEKA, Business Development Manager “I enjoyed turning 18 years old, because I became an adult and I could make my own decisions. There isn’t a particular age that I’m looking forward to, but each year I look forward to the challenges that growing older has in store for me. I smile because each birthday brings out a more mature and wiser lady in me.” Ayanda is 29 years old.
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PHOTOGRAPHY Judd van Rensburg and Des Tak STYLIST Dumi Gwebu HAIR and MAKE-UP Nthato Mashishi CLOTHING YDE, Callaghan, Fashion Depot SHOES Europa Art Shoes ACCESSORIES Ruby in the Dust
MAPULE MAKHUBELA, Marketing Manager for MTN Business “Turning 25 was the best time for me, because I realised that I had a great life. I had a fulfilling career, a good man, and two beautiful daughters. My life had direction and I really liked the direction it was taking. I’m looking forward to turning 40. I truly believe life begins at that age. I have friends who are over 40 and they seem to be enjoying it, so I’m also looking forward to the experience.” Mapule is 33 years old.
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special report
GREAT AFRICAN WOMEN
In celebration of National Women’s Day, Melinda Ferguson pays homage to incredible women from our continent – from those still making their mark today, to those whom have passed on.
WANGARI MAATHAI (1940- )
When Wangari Maathai became the first African woman to win the Nobel Peace Prize in 2004, women across the continent and the world celebrated with pride. In 1977 she took the first step in what would become a huge and important environmental campaign in Kenya, by planting trees in her back garden. And so the Green Belt Movement was born to address the devastating effects of deforestation in Kenya. Her efforts resulted in poverty-stricken women helping to plant over 30 million tress. Although she has ultimately been lauded for her great work, Wangari’s earlier efforts and forwardthinking have resulted in her arrest as well as being beaten unconscious by heavy-handed law enforcers.
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MIRIAM TLALI (1933- )
Miriam Tlali was the first black woman in South Africa to publish a book, titled Muriel At Metropolitan. Born in 1933 she grew up in Sophiatown, and when she tried to enrol at Wits University she was turned away, because she was black. She tried to complete her studies at the University of Lesotho but, due to financial restraints, she had to leave before graduating. She wrote her first book while she was working as a bookkeeper in a furniture store in Johannesburg. Although she began writing Muriel At Metropolitan in 1969, it took six years to get published, only to be banned in 1979. Miriam was an avid contributor of the publication Staffrider, and penned a regular column Soweto Speaking. She went on to write a number of books, including the banned work Amandla, and the play Crimen Injuria whilst in The Netherlands. Miriam continues to write and is still living in Soweto.
WINNIE MADIKIZELA MANDELa (1936- )
Perhaps one of the more controversial figures in the struggle for freedom in South Africa, Winnie Madikizela Mandela has risen from the ashes a number of times and right now she is hot news. At the African National Congress (ANC) Polokwane conference in December 2007 she was voted onto the National Executive Council, and secured fifth place on the ANC’s electoral list for the 2009 general election. Her involvement in the struggle began in the 1950s. She suffered for many years under the apartheid government, especially when she was banished to the small town of Brandfort in the Free State, under house arrest, while married to Nelson Mandela. In the 1980s, a cloud was cast over Mama Winnie for her alleged involvement in the killing of the youngster Stompie Seipei. But, a survivour like no other, the Mother of the Nation has re-emerged in the hearts and souls of South Africans, and her legacy lives bright and strong.
BESSIE HEAD (1937-1986)
PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/gettyimages.com; True Love Library; Gallo Images/Wire Image
As one of Africa’s most successful and well-loved authors, Bessie Head is probably best known for her work Maru and When The Rain Clouds Gather. Through her works, she challenged apartheid ideology, writing about black women and their struggles with racist and sexist discrimination. Her writings also embraced hope for social changes. She would have been relieved to see how many of her wishes have manifested in our democratic South Africa today.
CHARLIZE THERON (1975- )
South Africa’s only Oscar-winning actress continues to be a great ambassador for the country. Portraying the real-life serial killer Aileen Wournos in the independent hit film Monster, Charlize transformed her usual blonde and long-limbed glamorous looks into the trailer-park trash and grotesque appeal of Wournos. Her unforgettable performance in Monster won her numerous awards in 2004, including a Golden Globe and Academy Award. Her role in movies such as The Devil’s Advocate and more recently The Burning Plain have proven to the world that our Benoni girl is no flash in the pan.
ELLEN JOHNSON-SIRLEAF (1938- )
Ellen Johnson-Sirleaf is Liberia’s and Africa’s first and only female president and, despite her diminutive frame, is known as the “Iron Lady”, much the same as her British counterpart Magaret Thatcher was called when she was Prime Minister of the United Kingdom. Ellen was educated at Harvard University in the United States (US) and was the Finance Minister of Liberia in the ’70s. She has been the president of Liberia since January 2006 and by all accounts the Liberian people are very satisfied with their elected head of state. In November 2007, she received the US Presidential Medal of Freedom, the US government’s highest civilian award. Ellen is the mother of four boys and has eight grandchildren.
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special report
MIRIAM MAKEBA (1932-2008)
When Mama Afrika passed on late last year, after performing a show in Italy, the world went into mourning. For over five decades Miriam Makeba has bewitched audiences with her memorable, unique and beautiful voice. An activist, actress, author and world-class performer, Mama Afrika became known to the world when she performed in Todd Matshikiza’s King Kong and the anti-apartheid film Come Back Africa. Most notably she was the first African to win a Grammy Award when she sang with Harry Belafonte. During her 31-year exile from South Africa, she addressed the United Nations twice on the subject of South Africa’s oppressive apartheid policies. She was friends with jazz great Nina Simone, married Black Power activist Stokley Carmichael and sang her wonderful songs for great leaders such as Fidel Castro, JF Kennedy and our own Madiba. When she returned to South Africa in 1990, she continued performing and playing at sold-out concerts right to the last year of her life, performing for an enraptured audience in Rome. Hamba kahle (Goodbye) Mama Miriam. You are sorely missed by us all, but your music lives on.
MKABAYI KA JAMA (Birth date unknown)
Princess Mkabayi ka Jama was a heroic women who exercised immense political power in the 1700s. Mkabayi was a twin, and Zulu custom of that era dictated that one twin be sacrificed to ward off bad luck that would cause the death of one of the parents. However, her father refused to kill one of his daughters. As a result, Mkabayi devoted her entire life to looking after the Zulu Kingdom due to the sacrifice her parents made for her to live. For decades Mkabayi was the power behind the throne during the reign of successive Zulu kings including King Shaka. Today she lies buried in the KwaZulu-Natal coalmining and cattle-ranching town of Vryheid at Kwa Sgwegwede, and is remembered as a remarkable woman.
CLEOPATRA (69-30 BC)
Somewhat of a mythical figure, Cleopatra was the last Pharoah of Ancient Egypt. During her reign it was widely believed she was the reincarnation and embodiment of Thoth, the mythical God of Wisdom. She was also said to be a great beauty with an enormous sexual appetite, brains, wit and charm. She was able to hold her own against the most powerful men of the time and after Cleopatra and her lover, Mark Antony, were defeated by Julius Caeser Octavian, she committed suicide, allegedly by allowing the highly poisonous snake, the asp, to bite her. Her legacy has shone bright in the annals of history for thousands of years.
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ELLEN KUZWAYO (1914-2006)
The struggles of black South African women was made all the more poignant by the writings of anti-apartheid activist and author Ellen Kuzwayo. Her autobiography Call Me Woman is a seminal work and a testimony to the strength and resilience of black women during the nation’s struggle years. She was president of the ANC Youth League in the 1960s and in 1994 she was elected to the first postapartheid South African Parliament. Her stories have inspired countless women to break free of the shackles of tradition and pursue their dreams, and make their own way in life.
Possibly one of the greatest beauties to come out of Africa, Iman is like great wine… she has just grown better with age. All sorts of legends have surrounded this beautiful Somalian, such as the rumour that she was discovered while herding sheep when she was a young woman in Somalia. In fact, the young Iman, who’s father was a former Somali ambassador to Saudi Arabia, was spotted while studying at Nairobi University in Kenya. This international beauty was urbanised and could speak five languages, including English, when she began her career on the catwalk. Iman is married to superstar David Bowie, with whom she has shared a long and passionate relationship. After modelling for 16 years, Iman retired from modelling and has spent her time acting, launching her own brands and doing meaningful charity work.
PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/Gilele Wulfsohn; True Love Library
IMAN MOHAMED ABDULMAJID (1955- )
special report
BRENDA FASSIE (1964-2004)
Affectionately known as “Ma Brrr”, Brenda Fassie left her home town of Langa, in Cape Town, at the age of 16 to seek fame and fortune in Jo’burg. Her huge hit Weekend Special rocketed her into Mzansi’s consciousness and it became the fastest selling single of the time. She created many controversies by her often outrageous public behaviour. Sadly, towards the end of her life, her addiction to alcohol and drugs brought about her all too sudden demise. As her addiction took a firmer grip on her life, Brenda became less productive and less coherent. She died in the Sunninghill Clinic from respiratory failure brought on by an asthma-related condition (often symptomatic of crack cocaine addiction) on 9 May 2004 at the age of 40. Mzansi’s people miss her and wish they could’ve seen her live to a full and ripe old age.
NAWAL EL SAADAWI (1931- )
LILLIAN NGOYI (1911-1980)
One of South Africa’s most beloved and powerful women leaders during the apartheid struggle was Lillian Ngoyi. Known as “Ma Ngoyi” by her comrades and scores of ANC supporters, she was the first President of the ANC Women’s League, as well as a leading member of the National Executive Council of the ANC. Born into dire poverty and deeply affected by the negative consequences of apartheid, Ma Ngoyi was part of the historic women’s march on Pretoria in 1956 against restrictive and demoralising apartheid policies. Although being banned and persecuted took its toll on her health, Ma Ngoyi’s spirit never dampened. In the words of the great writer Ezekiel Mphahlele: “Mrs. Ngoyi is a brilliant orator. She can toss an audience on her little finger, get men grunting with shame and a feeling of smallness, and infuse everyone with renewed courage.” Her legacy lives on.
RUTH FIRST (1925-1982)
Ruth First was killed by a parcel bomb addressed to her while living in exile in Mozambique. She was one of South Africa’s most feisty and well-known antiapartheid activists, and was the wife of Joe Slovo. A great writer and intellectual, she spent many years in exile in London where she was active in the Movement Against Apartheid. It was when Ruth moved to Mozambique to take up a post as a director in a research training project, that she was targeted and assassinated on the order of Craig Williamson, a major in the apartheid security police.
ADELAIDE TAMBO (1929-2007)
MAMPHELA RAMPHELE (1947- )
In 1996, Mamphela Ramphele became the first woman and black person in South Africa to hold the title of university vice-chancellor when she took up the position at the University of Cape Town. Along with Steve Biko, with whom she had a longstanding relationship, Mamphela was a founding member of the Black Consciousness Movement. This inspiring intellectual and orator is also an author of many works, one of her finest being The Bounds Of Possibility: The Legacy Of Steve Biko. In 2000 she joined the World Bank in Washington D.C. as Managing Director of Human Development. She is, or has been, a board member of many powerful businesses and organisations including Anglo American and Transnet.
Adelaide “Ma Tambo” was one of the greatest female icons of the struggle for freedom in South Africa, due to her prominent work as an anti-apartheid activist and political refugee. Whenever her name is uttered, it is with great respect and affection. Married to the late Oliver Tambo, president of the ANC from 1956 until his death from a stroke in 1993, Ma Tambo also served as a Member of Parliament from 1994 to 1999. Before her death in 2007, Ma Tambo was awarded the Order of the Baobab in Gold, one of the highest honours bestowed by the democratic South African government post 1994. She is survived by her son, Dali, and daughters, Thembi and Tselane.
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PHOTOGRAPHS True Love Library; Gallo Images/AFP; Gallo Images/Die Burger
An Egyptian feminist writer, doctor and activist Nawal El Saadawi has written many books, but the most powerful have been on her outspoken attitudes against the practise of female genital mutilation. Nawal herself underwent this horrific procedure as a young girl and as a result, her life-long dedication in advocacy against this barbaric practice began. Her most well-known works include The Hidden Face, God Dies By The Nile and her first book, Women And Sex, which evoked such an outcry and antagonism that she was dismissed from Egypt’s Ministry of Health.
special report
Princess Magogo was a Zulu princess, an artist and mother to IFP leader Chief Mangosuthu Buthelezi. She was wellknown for composing Zulu classical music and was extremely talented at playing ugubhu (a stringed bow and calabash instrument) as well as being a brilliant singer. As an imbongi (praise singer), traditionally a male domain, she broke many boundaries. She inspired many young women to follow their creative dreams and made a great contribution to the preservation of traditional music.
GRACA MACHEL (1945- )
A political and humanitarian force to be reckoned with, not only is Graca Machel the wife of our beloved Madiba, she is also a founding member of The Elders, along with Kofi Anan, Desmond Tutu and other political stalwarts. The widow of assasinated Mozambican president Samora Machel, Graca has an awesome CV, including being the former Minister of Education in Mozambique and a Cultural Ambassador for the UN Children’s Fund. She has received countless awards for her humanitarian work including the UN’s Nansen Medal in 1995 in recognition of her long-standing work on behalf of refugee children.
HELEN SUZMAN (1917 – 2009)
Born in Germiston in 1917 in Germiston, Helen Suzman studied as an economist and statistician at Wits University where she later became a lecturer. She was elected to Parliament in 1953 and known for her strong public criticism of the governing National Party’s apartheid policies at the time. She was once accused by a minister of asking questions in parliament that embarrassed South Africa. She replied: “It is not my questions that embarrass South Africa; it is your answers.” She died on New Year’s Day 2009 at the age of 91. Achmat Dangor, Nelson Mandela Foundation chief executive, said Helen will be remembered for being a “great patriot and a fearless fighter against apartheid”.
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ALBERTINA SISULU (1918- )
Affectionately known as “Ma Sisulu”, Albertina, the widow of struggle stalwart Walter Sisulu, became a strong and vocal activist in the 1940s when she joined the ANC Women’s League. She pioneered the campaign to boycott apartheid’s Bantu education policies and was at the forefront of the Freedom March on Pretoria in 1956 to protest the existing laws. Involved for decades in numerous humanitarian and charity causes, Ma Sisulu was always very vocal about her belief on the role of women in the struggle. In 1987, at the height of the State of Emergency, she said: “Women are the people who are going to relieve us from all this oppression and depression. It is the women who are on the street committees, educating the people to stand up and protect each other.”
CHARLOTTE MAXEKE (1874-1939)
This former school teacher from Kimberley was South Africa’s first black woman to attain a Bachelor’s degree, despite not being able to study in South Africa because of apartheid. On a choir tour of the US, she managed to enrol in Wilberforce University in Cleveland, and graduated with a Bachelor of Science degree in 1905. While at Wilberforce, she met and later married Marshall Maxeke. She became the first black female parole officer for juvenile delinquents, and headed an employment agency for black women. An inspiring activist, Charlotte also become involved in the campaign against pass books and was an ardent supporter of the trade union movements. She truly was a freedom trailblazer.
SAARTJIE BAARTMAN (1789-1816)
A tragic figure, Saartjie Baartman of the Griqua tribe, was 20 when English ship surgeon, William Dunlop, duped her into going to London on the promise of making lots of money. Instead, she was paraded as a “freak” due to the size of her huge buttocks and large vulva. Her anatomy even inspired a comic opera in France,The Hottentot Venus. In 1994, her remains were brought back home on the request of former President Nelson Mandela.
MARIA RAMOS (1959- )
Maria Ramos has been described as a “gem” by many in the financial sector, and since her union with former Finance Minister and now Minister in the Presidency, Trevor Manuel, we go to sleep at night feeling safe knowing that the country’s finances are somehow being looked after by this financially sussed couple. She did exceptionally well as the CEO of Transnet, and is now the CEO of ABSA. She’s one of the most sought after financial gurus in the world and known for her insights and amazing fiscal talents.
CECILIA MAKIWANE (1880-1919)
As the first licensed black professional nurse in Africa, Cecilia Makiwane has inspired many women who have followed in her footsteps. She worked for many years at Lovedale Hospital in the Eastern Cape and was eventually granted long leave after she experienced ill health. She died young at the age of 39. In honour of this inspirational and hard-working woman, a hospital near East London in the Eastern Cape, has been named after her. It is tradition amongst nurses to observe 7 January as a day of prayer to honour Cecilia.
PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/gettyimages.com; Gallo Images/Film Magic; True Love Library
PRINCESS MAGOGO (1900-1984)
AND THE NOT SO GREAT... NONGQAWUSE (1840s-1898)
In 1856 a young Xhosa prophetess named Nongqawuse told her people that she had been informed by mysterious figures that their cattle were contaminated, which is why they were dying, and that the ancestors would come back from the dead with new cattle and restore Xhosa land to new life if they would kill all their livestock. She also told them to destroy their crops. Many people obeyed Nongqawuse and for 10 months a “kind of madness” possessed them. It is estimated that they killed between 300 000 and 400 000 head of cattle and burned their crops until they had nothing left. It was literally a ritual suicide and tens of thousands of people starved. Nongqawuse fled to live on a farm called Glen Shaw in the district of Alexandria in the Eastern Cape and died in 1898. However, as a result of her misguided “prophecy” more than 100 000 Xhosas (80 percent of their population at the time) died from starvation.
WHITE CHAIR COURTESY OF LDC Living Designer Collection. www.ldcshop.co.za. Email: sales@ldcshop.co.za
GRACE MUGABE (1965- )
Style no 7178
Grace Mugabe has not been getting a great wrap in the press over these last few years – that’s probably why she’s taken to slapping journalists! On a recent trip to Hong Kong she assaulted Times photographer Richard Jones outside a luxury hotel by punching him repeatedly in the face, while wearing diamond-encrusted rings, causing him cuts and abrasions. Known as “Gucci Grace” or “The First Shopper”, her shopping sprees at places such as Bergdorf’s and Harrods in London have made her extremely unpopular with those who are amazed that she can shop while the rest of Zimbabwe starves. Robert Mugabe married Grace in an extravagant Catholic mass, titled the “Wedding of the Century” by the Zimbabwe press, after the death of his first wife, Sally Hayfron. Grace is also popularly known in Zimbabwe as “Dis-Grace”, a reference to her extravagant lifestyle.
A murder that shocked the whole world was the one orchestrated by cold-hearted killer Dina Rodriguez who, along with four hitmen, were found guilty of murdering her boyfriend’s child, baby Jordan, in 2005. Dina was sentenced to life in prison for her heinous crime. The case grabbed the public’s imagination, and was keenly watched by many across the world. When Judge Basheer Waglay handed down sentence in the Cape High Court, he described the murder of the defenseless six-month-old baby as “calculated, callous and committed in cold blood”. The public gallery applauded when the verdict was read.
NAJWA PETERSEN (1962- )
www.froggie.co.za
In one of South Africa’s most sensational murder trials of 2008, with a cast and script to rival the most popular soapies, court watchers and sensation-seekers crammed the gallery of the Cape High Court daily as the trial of Najwa Petersen and her three co-accused unfolded – accused of murdering Najwa’s husband, the much-loved entertainer Taliep Petersen. The gallery exploded in applause when Justice Siraj Desai announced his verdict: that Najwa had cruelly and intentionally murdered her husband with the help of two of her co-accused, for money. Today Najwa is serving life in prison.
PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/City Press
DINA RODRIGUEZ (1981- )
TRUE STORY
UNIVERSITY OF
LIFE hen you spend all your high school years as an A-student who is admired by teachers and fellow school mates alike, it seems as though the world’s your oyster and your success is guaranteed. Then comes your first year at varsity and you slowly realise that life operates on different rules. It’s a completely different environment with bigger responsibilities, which rudely awakens you to the fact that life is not just a walk in the park. It was at the architecture department, where I studied, that I saw racism at play and it felt like black students were not making it because information was being hidden from them. Allow me to explain. Throughout high school, I used to find so much comfort in drawing. So when I finished school, even though I wasn’t that clued up on architecture, I decided it would be an ideal field of study because a large part of it involved drawing. I hadn’t expected university to be a breeze but also didn’t anticipate the three-in-a-row sleepless nights. I was baffled by how the lecturers didn’t treat us like people who were novices who were doing this for the first time. I had gone to a rural school, so this was my first time in a diverse environment. I was also surprised by how difficult it was for the different races to come together and form a unified class. We all used to sit in our little segregated groups. No one dared to break that unwritten rule, which made it difficult for
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Linda Danisa relays how life’s hardships strengthened her resolve to become the architect of her success today. By Kemong Mopedi.
‘MY WISH IS FOR EVERY DISADVANTAGED BLACK CHILD TO REALISE THAT WHAT THEY’RE ENDURING NOW IS ONLY THE BEGINNING OF BIGGER AND BETTER THINGS TO COME.’
us to ask each other for help. I remember an incident where almost all the white lecturers were resigning because a black head of department had been appointed and his aim was to enrol more black students in the department. In my first year everything went well and I passed. We were three black girls in our class, two of whom dropped out at the end of the first year. I continued through to second year, which I also thought wouldn’t be difficult if I continued working my butt off. But this was also the year I realised that hard work was not enough sometimes. When things are not going the way you want them to, it’s very easy for self-pity to set in. I used to sit in a two-hour taxi ride to and from varsity and I used to feel like I was wasting time. Some of my classmates from well-off families who had gone to good schools knew someone, either in their family or through a friend, who was a practising architect and could therefore get extra help. I, on the other hand, had to depend on trial and error alone. The fact that I didn’t have a computer at home and wasn’t staying on campus made things more difficult. I was forced to spend 24 hours in the department’s computer lab just drawing non-stop. Sometimes I’d be working around the clock in the lab and I’d take a power nap underneath the desk at my work station. And when the Durban sun rose I would go to a friend’s room at the residence for a quick shower and I’d be back in the studio again. Let’s just say the studio had become my second home. Sometimes we had to do presentation assignments and the material alone would cost about R500. I wish someone could’ve warned me about the extra costs that were involved. Imagine going through all this effort, only to fail at the end of it all! I felt stupid and like the universe was cutting me a raw deal. I failed my second year, not once but twice! When I contemplated dropping out of varsity, it wasn’t that I wanted to but because I felt that things would never improve. But sitting at home was not even an option; I couldn’t picture myself doing anything other than architecture.
PURE PERSEVERANCE
I approached the owners of a Durban-based architectural firm called Seedat & Seedat, showed them some of my drawings and told them what had happened with my studies.
‘I wish someone could’ve warned me about the extra costs that were involved. Imagine going through all this effort, only to fail at the end of it all!’ One of the owners explained what an uphill battle it had been for him to obtain his degree and urged me not to quit. But my mind was already made up. was good at what I was doing, so they employed me. I was doing the work of a junior architect, even though I wasn’t working as one per se. I used Seedat & Seedat as a platform to re-focus myself on my dream of one day owning my own firm. I saved money to go back to varsity, bought a computer and got a feel for the workplace at the same time. When I went back to varsity in 2008, things were much easier the second time around because I had done most of the curriculum in the office. By now you may be wondering what the point of my story is because many black children experience the same struggles that I went through. People often say that you shouldn’t let your background determine where you’re going. But what they forget to mention are the hurdles that people from disadvantaged backgrounds come across. I felt better working at Seedat & Seedat because I had taken a huge step towards reaching my dream, but the pressure from
neighbours soon began to take its toll on me. They demanded to know what year of study I was in, when I’d be graduating, when I’d start working and so forth. All these questions made me even more determined to finish my studies. I finally graduated in April this year and after everything that happened I didn’t care about congratulatory messages, my graduation outfit or even bother with feeling proud. I just wanted my degree so I could carry on with my plans of registering my company, Adrenalinda. I want it to be an empire of design and thought, where we bring the most ground-breaking ideas to life. In hindsight, I’m glad I experienced hardship during my varsity days because every day I realise how much I’ve matured. I don’t demand anything from life and I don’t take it for granted. I’ve learned that hardships force you to work harder because you never want to find yourself in the same situation twice. More importantly, it doesn’t matter that I didn’t finish in record time. What’s important is that I did graduate at the age of 25. At the moment I work for a project management company that specialises in architectural consulting. And I’m the only employee who is tasked with drawing. I am keen to move to Johannesburg because there seems to be more development and opportunities for growth. My wish is for every disadvantaged black child to realise that what they’re enduring now is only the beginning of bigger and better things to come. Feeling sorry for yourselves and blaming your hardship on an unfair world will only lead you to quit. Trust me, if you persevere you will not always be at a disadvantage. n
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CAREERS
BOSS LADY
Female leaders are often criticised for being cold-hearted and dragonlike, yet their male counterparts are described as ‘inspirational, powerful and visionary’. Melinda Ferguson unpacks the double standards related to male and female bosses.
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the room we’d flash the Nazi sign at her. Her nickname was Miz Hitler. I was never sure whether we reacted to her like this because she was a woman or because she was a tad unstable. About two years later I worked for a male boss, Mr Mvundla*, and it was as though I was meeting the male version of Miz Hitler. Some days Mr Mvundla was charming and inspiring. Other days he’d march in, slam his door shut, and no one would dare go past his office lest he ranted about a problem he had latched onto. The issue was we were much more tolerant of Mr Mvundla’s moods than we were of Marcia’s. Even now in 2009 and despite the inroads we have made with regard to female empowerment, many gender-based preconceptions are still alive and kicking in the workplace. Ayanda Mzwai, 37, a public relations manager, headed a team of 10 employees a few years back. It was her first experience as “the boss”. “I had a mixed gender team, but the moment I walked
HOW THE GENDERS DIFFER
On communication: Men talk to give information or to report, while women talk to collect information or gain rapport. Men focus on facts, reason and logic, while women focus on feelings, senses and meaning. Men thrive on competing and achieving; women thrive on harmony and relating. On taking the work home: One of the most striking results is that women and men bosses differ in regard to coping strategies. In cases of conflict and unfair treatment, some women take their problems home with them and develop psychosomatic symptoms to a greater extent than their male colleagues. Women managers also found it more difficult to tune out of their work during their leisure time in comparison with their male counterparts. SOURCE: http://careerbright.blogspot.com
PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
female boss who is every bit as assertive and goal orientated as an archetypal male boss will be deemed by some employees as mean and ruthless and if she’s not as aggressive as the male stereotype, she’s considered an emotional pushover.” That’s according to Anthony Badernamm, a careers expert featured on the website CareerBuilder.com. When I read this statement on the Internet it made me think about two bosses I had worked for. Marcia Jones* (not her real name, lest she sues me for defamation!) was a very determined, headstrong person but also prone to mood swings. On good days she was focussed, driven, clear and motivating. On bad days she would walk into the office and everyone would scatter in her tremulous wake. She would rant and rave, and find fault in the smallest details. When she was in this mode, whenever she left
into the office, I felt an attitude from my female colleagues. I have always been a savvy dresser and taken a lot of care with my appearance, but it felt like this really counted against me when it came to the women at work. “When I tried to exert any authority with them I was met with blank stares or hostile glares. The males in the team were much more amenable. I suppose I began to work better with them than I did with the females because I was finding more acceptance from the men. “Of course, this only exaggerated my problems in managing the women, as they thought I was showing favouritism. Whatever I did it seemed I was a threat more than an ally. It was a difficult time for me. It really got bad untiI I had to go to the human resources deparment for intervention, when a number of the women resigned in the team. In the end, I lasted less than a year in the job and ended up resigning and starting my own business.” Siyabonga Nkosi is a Johannesburgbased clinical psychologist with a special interest in workplace psychological issues. He is also a regular guest on Noeleen Maholwna-Sanqgu’s televison show, 3Talk with Noeleen, and on Radio 702. “There are a number of issues that impact on female leadership, but the most critical are gender stereotypes, personalities and the culture of the organisation.
If an organisation does not have policies that support women leaders, they may experience difficulties with regards to opportunities for them to be effective in their roles,” explains Nkosi. Tumisang Zimba, a human resources partner with a cellphone service provider, believes that insecurities in female bosses can make them behave in ways that could compromise themselves. “Some female bosses are aware of the preconceived notions around female bosses, and may feel that they need to try harder (unnecessarily) to dispel these myths. For example, they may run the show in a way that ensures they make as few mistakes as possible, as they fear this may be interpreted as incompetence. So they’re hard on themselves and just as unforgiving with their teams.” Of course, there is a flipside to this. Erica Tema who works as a wardrobe assistant in the movie industry, prefers working for females bosses. “I find women bosses more creative and sensitive to our needs. Like when I had child-care issues while working on my last series, my female director was really cool and understanding. Whereas, if I’m working for one of the gung-ho male directors, talking about kids is like swearing. There is absolutely no humanity when it comes to working for most men. And you have to put up with crude remarks and the
GOOD BOSS, BAD BOSS FEMALE BOSS
MALE BOSS
THE GOOD
THE BAD
Understanding Emotionally in tune Sympathetic Leniant Generous
Complicated Aggressive Threatening Arrogant Insecure and Bossy
Forthright Decisive Organised Admirable Inspired
Bullying Lecherous Aggressive Unsympathetic Frightening
In a recent survey on the website www.happyworker.com on gender boss preferences, 37 percent of people surveyed preferred a male boss; 19 percent preferred a female boss, and 43 percent didn’t mind either way. But younger workers seemed more balanced in their response. Amongst workers, aged bsetween 18 and 34, 31 percent said they would prefer to work for a male boss, 29 percent preferred a female boss, while 40 percent didn’t have a preference. SOURCE: www.happyworker.com
frequent sexual passes. Give me a female to work for any day.” Says Zimba: “From a human relations perspective, people often have preconceived notions about male and female bosses and their styles of leadership. Most companies are investing a lot of career development into women, so more than likely you may find yourself with a female boss than a male one.” Nkosi says there are definite differences in male and female leadership methods. “In my experience of coaching leaders, I’ve found that female and male leaders tend to exhibit different styles. Female leaders predominantly draw from their emotional intelligence as a reference base and therefore, seem to be better at communicating and cultivating positive working relationships. More so because it would seem that our society promotes that women should be more expressive of their thoughts and feelings, which works in their favour in the workplace. They also, generally, seem to be better at managing a diverse workforce and fare well in motivating teams. “However, there is the risk of women wanting to replicate ‘the boys’ club’ behaviour in order to be visible and this, at times, can be quite costly to their leadership effectiveness,” explains Nkosi.
WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUCHY
After interviewing a number of males and females, it seems that the major gripe against male bosses is that they may be discriminating and sexually inappropriate, as in Zandi’s* case. She is a 23-year-old temp from Katlehong who found her male boss’s behaviour inappropriate. “He would send me emails telling me how hot I looked. He was always leering at me; maybe because I was on a temp assignment, he thought he could push his luck. The final straw came when he suggested we go on a trip together. I handed in my resignation that day.” The majority of complaints against female bosses entailed moodiness and inconsistency, as in Moabi Keaikitse’s experience, a 28-year old public relations officer with the Ministry of Health in Gaborone, Botswana. “Working for a woman is a huge challenge. One needs to brush up on the psych textbook and go big on analysis every
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TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
A FRESH START
Lesego Ranchu recently entered into a business partnership after a whirlwind career in communications. She discusses the highs and lows of starting her own recruitment company. Why did you choose to give up your job and start a business? My last employer and I did not see eye to eye on many work processes. So, after a difficult and trying sixmonth period we decided to part ways. During those months my partner and I conceptualised and registered the business. I also wanted the long-term security of owning a business to ensure that my daughter has all the opportunities I had as a child. Also, I grew up in a home of entrepreneurs, so it was bound to catch up with me. How did you come up with the idea for the business? And what kind of research did you do to find out if the idea would be viable? It was my passion for people and the fact that agencies were not ensuring that candidates will fit into their new environment. In the past, I had been referred by an agency to attend interviews with potential employers, and then they didn’t even make an effort to interview me themselves. This is precisely why people are so miserable in their jobs – because agencies do not ensure the right chemistry match between employer and employee. Most of the research to start the business involved interaction with a number of entities to determine the demand for recruitment, the type of candidates the companies require versus who they were getting, and the market offerings available based on a number of case studies. Describe your feelings when you started Personnel Studio. I was terrified! Suddenly I had to make everything work, as opposed to arriving at a job and everything being set up for you. But it is exciting to work for something that you strongly believe in and are passionate about. Each day presents something new in this environment – you just have to be ready to deal with it all the time! What challenges have you dealt with so far? From a business development point of view, most companies already have what they call preferred suppliers. We’ve had challenges regarding tendering for some clients. We have had some financial challenges because we financed the business ourselves. You just have to learn to deal with them one at a time. Have you started seeing any returns yet? Financially, there has been nothing dramatic. The most visible returns are the relationships we’ve established thus far, the qualities and awesome skills of the candidates we have on our database, and the realisation that it is happening for us! ◆ For more information on Personnel Studio, call 011 021 4446 or visit www.personnelstudio.co.za.
WORDS Nonhlanhla Khumalo PHOTOGRAPHY Pierre van den Bosch STYLIST Brains Tshabalala MAKEUP Vuyo Varoyi CLOTHING Jo Borkett SHOES Europa Art Shoes
day. Working for a woman, [you can be sure] something changes every day. You may be adored today for being able to send an email and be ridiculed tomorrow for what others called a brilliant press release. It’s a total gamble.” Keaikitse has found working for older women especially challenging. “Older ladies are of the school of thought that like to treat you like a small boy, especially if you tend to be opinionated. So, it’s never easy to be objective with them because you have to always show them that they are right. If you don’t, you will have to start updating your CV, as everything you do won’t amount to much as long they are your boss! Zimba suggests that adjustments may need to be made when working for the different genders. “You may have to adjust your interactions in a more formal way. For example, you would probably be able to walk up to your male boss and discuss a pretty important issue, whereas you’re likely to have to make an appointment with a female boss. In the same breath, you may be able to get the time you want to speak about your performance increase with a female boss, and feel that your male boss only wants the bottom line. “Ultimately, after working for both males and females, I have realised that people are people, bosses are bosses, whether they are male or female, and some personalities will be challenging to deal with.” According to Nkosi, the way one handles male or female bosses all depends on people’s personalities, the stereotypes on gender, and their experience of either female or male leaders. “Work relationships are dependent on personalities and how people exercise emotional intelligence. People, in general, tend to bring their script on relationships to the workplace and it is the degree to which people exercise emotional intelligence that helps them manage diversity. The major challenge is that female managers lead through relationship building rather than content, whereas male managers lead mainly through content. People who are not used to either strategies may find it difficult to adjust. “But if leaders balance both aspects and create a creative environment for their teams, they will succeed even in the most difficult times,” says Nkosi. *Names have been changed.
PROMOTION
any women don’t realise what a great help technology can be to their everyday lives. Palesa Chabula, Executive Head of Corporate Communications at Vodacom, shares with you how she uses mobile Internet to manage her daily responsibilities. “As a homemaker and career woman, I know only too well how busy life can be. Coping with a modern lifestyle can be a daunting task, but the latest technology from Vodacom has made my life much easier. For example, if I want to see the latest chick flick, I am able to find the closest theatre and make reservations by using my cellphone to go online. “And when I have important emails to respond to, I can do it from the comfort of my home while still tending to my little one’s needs. All of this is possible thanks to my BlackBerry push email function. And when I’m waiting to catch a flight and want to spend the time productively, I can download files from the company network using a secure and fast HSDPA 3.6 connection. “If, like me, you would like an easy, no-fuss way to determine which data service and package is best for you, then visit www.vodacom.co.za. By answering a few easy questions using our online data calculator, you will find the best fit for your new technologically convenient lifestyle.”
GET CONNECTED PHOTOGRAPHY Justin Dingwall MAKE-UP Vuyo Varoyi
ON YOUR CELLPHONE: Browse your favourite websites, search Google, update Facebook and check your email, all from your cellphone. USE YOUR CELLPHONE AS A MODEM: You can now experience fast Internet connection from your PC by using your cellphone as a modem. ON YOUR PC: Use a data-card, USB modem or Wi-Fi Router to connect to the Internet wherever, whenever!
EVERY WOMAN’S HELPER Make life’s juggling act a little bit easier with Vodacom.
For more information, visit www.vodacom.co.za.
money
PAPER TRAIL e live in a consumerdriven world where we are seduced into buying things we don’t need, get things in the mail we did not ask for and, instead of giving or throwing this stuff away, we hang onto it for years until it eventually takes over our lives. And the same applies to paper in all its forms. There is enough paper in the average household to cause a fire hazard, and there comes a time, perhaps when you can no longer stuff another sliver of paper into your drawers, that you will have to start discarding
Are your important documents haphazardly stashed away in a corner of your bedroom cupboard? Iona Minton gives you pointers on how to organise and file everything from your investment portfolio to your electricity bills.
CUT OUT THE CLUTTER
The first step is to invest in 10 files, dividers and some plastic sleeves. You will need one additional large lever-arch file which will be an archive file. Now label the files. For instance, Investment and Insurance; Banking; Tax; Medical; Home; Car; Retail (clothing and furniture accounts); Receipts; Certificates,
‘There is enough paper in the average household to cause a fire hazard... ‘
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PHOTOGRAPH Corbis/Great Stock
QUICK, EASY
some of it. However, the dilemma is what to keep and what to trash? We have all had experiences of throwing away a receipt and then needing it the very next week. Another concern for many is the South African Revenue Services (SARS); what if they come knocking on your door looking for 2007’s restaurant bills that you claimed as business expenses? But before we get to the nitty-gritty of what you should keep, you need to get a system in place to ensure that the documents you hold onto are stored effectively. Getting this system in place will give you more than peace of mind; it will save you time, help you in case of an emergency, and help your family sort out your affairs should anything happen to you.
money
and finally, Important Documents. Then label the dividers in each file, choosing the ones that are applicable to you from the list below. n Investment and insurance: These include retirement annuities, shares, pension fund, endowment, unit trusts, funeral policy, education policy (whichever are applicable to you), as well as life insurance, disability cover, and home and car insurance. n Banking: Bank statements (if you bank with more than one institution, label them separately), credit cards and garage cards. n Tax: Copies of tax returns, refund notifications, correspondence, IRP 5’s, etc. n Medical: Medical aid contract, receipts for medical expenses, etc. n Home: Home loan agreement, statements, deeds, electrical compliance, maintenance costs, rate and tax bills, rental agreements, phone bills and Internet. n Car: Car lease, AA membership, registration documents, extended warranties, service records and insurance. n Retail Accounts: Clothing accounts, furniture, statements, etc. n Receipts: All receipts for purchases over R1 000, air tickets, guarantee documents for appliances, etc. n Certificates: Educational qualifications, work awards, etc. n Important Documents: Copies of your ID book, certified copies of your passport, copies of your driver’s licence, copies of birth and death certificates of family members, firearm licence and divorce documents. n Miscellaneous: Any other documents that are important, i.e. pets pedigree documents, Voyager miles statements, etc.
THE RULES
This step is the most time consuming but the most vital element of getting organised. Set aside a day to gather all the documents in your house. Sort them into the following categories and then begin purging. n Tax: All records pertaining to tax should be kept for five years. You can keep two years in the current file and archive the rest. n Home: Utility bills (rates, electricity, etc.) should be kept for one year in a current
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file and archive the rest for two years. Maintenance receipts should be kept for as long as the guarantee is valid. Keep phone bills for three months, assuming that you don’t use your phone or electricity bills as a home-business deduction; if you do, that must be stored in your tax file and should be kept for five years. n Banking: Keep in mind that most bills, like credit-card statements, and bank statements can be reproduced from the Internet if necessary. Keep three months worth in your current file and archive two more years. n Investments: Statements can be kept in your current file and the rest can be archived for three years. Complicated documents, such as legal papers, should be kept for the long haul. Have certified copies made of documents that may be difficult to duplicate, such as birth certificates and ID documents. You might want to consider buying a small fireproof box or a safe to store these document. You should also place copies in a sealed envelope and give it to a trusted family member or friend in case of theft or a fire.
n Bank: Account number, branch number and manager’s name. n Credit cards: Credit card number and call centre number. n Home loan: Account number and contact details. n Car loan: Account number and contact details. n Investment company: Type of investments, account numbers and contact details. n Financial advisor: Name and contact details. n Insurance: Broker’s name and contact details. If you’re dealing directly with the insurance company, include the name of the company, policy numbers and contact details. n Lawyers: Names and contact details. n Accountants and tax advisors: Names and contact details. n Retail accounts: A list of all account numbers, stores and credit department contact details. n Children’s school headmaster and contact details. n A list of siblings and relatives’ names and contact details.
‘You might want to consider buying a small fireproof box or a safe to store these document.’ INVENTORY LIST
Once you have your papers safely stored in files and you have thrown out all the documents you don’t need, make an inventory list of all your important documents. This should include the names and contact numbers of all the people you deal with. There are three reasons for this: One, if something happens to you, either an illness, an accident or death, your family will be able to sort through your affairs with ease. Two, if there is a fire or flood, you will be able to inform relevant parties with ease, and access the necessary documents for insurance. Three, it will save you time and frustration when you need to look something up. The check list should contain email addresses, contact details and names of the following individuals and organisations.
n Parents’ contact details. n Subscriptions to services such as gyms, magazines and Internet. n Golf clubs, social clubs, etc. n Medical aid: Policy number and call centre number. Once you have drawn up this list, store it in a place that is easily accessible and give a copy to a family member for safekeeping. These lists need to be kept up to date so you should review them at least once every six months. Many people have no clue where their important documents are located. If you are married, in all likelihood, your spouse is not fully aware of your commitments and obligations. Going through this process will focus both of you on each other’s financial affairs. It will also help you to get a big-picture view of your finances. If your investments file is empty and your retail accounts file is bursting at the seams
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MONEY
you will immediately see that there is room for improvement.
MANAGING YOUR MAIL
The next area to deal with is all the correspondence you get in the mail each day that does not need actioning but still needs to be addressed. Calendars, menus and catalogues all take up space and add clutter. Put up a notice board and pin the important stuff to it. If you must hold onto catalogues, store them in one place in a box, throw out the rest and recycle the paper if possible. A good way to reduce paper is to ask your service providers to email statements and invoices. Open up separate files on your PC to store them and don’t forget to back up regularly. Get rid of old newspapers and magazines, as it’s pointless keeping the September 1999 edition of Garden and Home for one tablesetting idea. Rather tear out pages of articles you want and keep them in a file. Okay, so the paper clutter has been sorted but what about all the other stuff you have accumulated over the years. Getting your home streamlined can really enhance your lifestyle. People with lots of clutter often buy more than they need because things are impossible to find. It can be a huge task, so tackle one room at a time. Stock up on some garbage bags and boxes and get to work. Divide the bags into two, one for the trash and one for charity. The rule of thumb is that if you have not used something for two years, it has to go. A room-by-room audit will help you uncover things you have long forgotten about. The benefits of living a clutter-free life are pretty obvious but there are psychological benefits too. Your efficiency will increase and you will find that everyday tasks can be completed effortlessly. In time you won’t have to wrestle with overfilled cupboards and sort through reams of paper, and in the process you’ll free up time and energy for the more important things. ■
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If you have taken the time and effort to seek out the help of a financial advisor but you would like to check on their credentials; you can log onto the Financial Services Board website, www.fsb.co.za, and do a search on their name or FSP licence number (they have to have this in order to practise). When you log on to the site, go to the “FAIS” tab and click on “search for financial services provider”. You can also establish whether the advisor has been debarred (lost his or her licence to practise). If they have acted unscrupulously and been found guilty of improper practices, they would have been debarred. You will need the advisor’s identity number to perform this check. They should have no problem giving it to you if they are above board. Feeling comfortable with your choice of financial advisor is not just about their qualifications; you must be comfortable with the relationship too. You need to be able to call them with questions without feeling like you are imposing on them, and they must be willing to return calls and give you guidance. This will be a long-term relationship, so you need to ensure that their attitude and general demeanour fit within your comfort zone. If you are having trouble finding an advisor, ask your network of friends and family for a referral.
&
Q A I lent R25 000 to a friend for a period of six months over two years ago, reinforced by a contract drawn up by his accountant. Now that I desperately need the money, I can’t get it back. What do I do?
A
The general rule about lending money to family and friends is that you must be sure that you won’t need it for your survival down the road. In other words, you should be prepared to never see the money again. This is not much use to you now, but it is important to highlight where you went wrong. You lent the money for a period of six months and allowed your friend to break the contract for a period of almost two years. Maybe you got tired of nagging and just let it be. Now you really need the money and it is not forthcoming. The problem with suddenly demanding money back after a long period is that the person may not have it available. So, you have to renegotiate the terms deal. Contact them and suggest a payment plan; if they agree, get them to give you post-dated cheques so that you have control over the deposits. If this fails you may have to refer to the contract. Unfortunately, you would have to consult a lawyer to explain the consequences of loans that have been dormant for long periods. If the contract and the claim is still valid, you can take legal steps to get the money back. If your friend doesn’t pay you, you can take judgment against them, which means that they will be blacklisted. Of course, this will cost money so the amount owed needs to be justifiable.
DO THE BANK SWAP
When times are tough and money’s too tight to mention, it makes sense to reassess the way you spend and save. One area where most people could benefit from a financial makeover is the way they bank. About 34 percent of people stay with the same bank for over 20 years because they assume that moving banks is complicated and time consuming. Carl Fischer, Executive: Marketing and Corporate Affairs at Capitec Bank, says that choosing the ideal bank should be based on comparative decisionmaking, similar to buying a TV set or a car. To access the necessary information about a bank’s benefits, their website is a good resource. Comparing the cost of typical transactions can save you money. Once you have researched your options, switching banks is simple. You will need your identity document and a proof of residence. When your application is accepted, your current bank will need your authorisation to provide your new bank with details of debit orders and any other transfers. You will also be asked to authorise your debit orders and inform those organisations of your new banking details. To avoid returned debit orders, it’s important that you do this before closing your old account.
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WORDS Iona Minton PHOTOGRAPH Corbis/Great Stock
CHECK OUT YOUR ADVISOR
consumer
SCORE ON A ‘SKEDONK’ The used car market has a few hidden gems at bargain prices if you get your facts straight. Anet Schoeman helps you fine-tune your negotiation tactics. steer clear of the potholes
Don’t be lulled into a false sense of security by a roadworthy certificate. Although this is a valuable document without which you cannot register a vehicle, this piece of paper is no guarantee that the vehicle is problem-free. It only means that the vehicle passed the minimum safety requirements for brakes, lights, shocks and tread on the wheels. Keep a beady eye on the odometer – that’s the instrument that indicates the mileage of the car. Does the reading correlate with the general condition of the car? If the car looks like it has travelled 100 000km and the odometer reading is 50 000km, something is amiss. Look at the pedals and the steering wheel for an indication of age, and inspect the odometer itself for scratches, which will indicate tampering. Insist on test driving the car, and if you are selling yours, don’t take a prospective buyer alone in your car, as some hijackers pretend to be interested buyers – some even operate as male and female couples. While driving check if the car veers to one side or if there are unusual noises when you brake. Ensure you don’t buy a stolen vehicle by checking if the registration papers and the VIN number (usually etched onto the left corner of the front window) match. Check whether the registration plates match the vehicle license and registration papers. Beware of dealers who are advertising as private sellers. When you enquire about a car you should say: “I’m calling about the car you advertised.” If the person asks which car, you know you are speaking to a dealer.
Your Options
There are three options to choose from – buy from a reputable dealer; buy directly from the owner, or bid and buy at an auction. You will probably get a great deal at an auction, but only go this route if you know your way around cars or have an expert to accompany you to the auciton.
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Buying from an honest dealer will be the safest, but you will end up paying commission to the dealer. Buying directly from the owner will ensure a good price, and as long as you follow our advice, you’ll be protected.
Stick To Your Budget
There are great bargains on offer (especially in these tough economic times), but don’t get carried away and bite off more than you can chew. Make a list of used cars and a budget that will suit your needs and stick to it.
Transfer The Car Warranty
Many new cars are sold with a service warranty, for example, a service plan of three years per 100 000km means that the manufacturer will pay for all services and most mechanical problems during that period. Normal wear and tear does not apply. So, if you buy a used car after one year, you will still have two years left on the warranty if you ensure that the
warranty has been transferred to your name. You may also, at a price, be able to get an extension on the existing service warranty
Have The Car Checked
Ask a third-party mechanic, not the dealer’s mechanic, to inspect the car as a condition of sale. If the dealer refuses, walk away from the sale. For R655, the Automobile Association (AA) scrutinises your prospective vehicle for structural and mechanical problems, and provide you with a detailed report. For information about your nearest AA, call 011 799 1001.
Check For Accident Telltales
Usually your mechanic will pick this up, but be on the lookout for overspray under the bonnet, usually from a previous paint job or any panel beating and welding. Check if all the panels of the car are the same paint colour and be on the lookout for panels that have uneven gaps between them.
PHOTOGRAPH Great Stock
and a young guy a screaming baby with a smelly nappy, tell him to sort out the problem and see how lost he will be. This is how most women would feel when faced with the tricky problem of buying or selling a used vehicle. And this is an expensive exercise that could cost you dearly if you put one foot wrong. The good news, however, is that with the right information you could sound like an expert and ensure that nobody takes you for a ride… so to speak.
SE X
O-O-ORGASMIC! Turbulent 20s
Refiloe raboikanyo, 27, fashion planner
ow old were you when you lost your virginity? I lost my virginity at the age of 19. My peers thought I was a late bloomer but I managed to catch up. Living with my grandparents made it really hard to be naughty. How did you find sex after your first encounter? I, surprisingly, loved it. I’d hear my peers saying it was painful and not worth it, but I fell in love with it from the word go. Maybe it’s because I didn’t go for the romantic stereotype of candles and soft music. I just wanted to lose it and move on. Was there ever a time when you thought that sex was overrated? Not at all. I generally think that people who think that sex is overrated don’t get it good enough or have some kind of psychological issue
Does your orgasm totally depend on what your partner does? Three women, at different stages of their lives, tell Kemong Mopedi about their toe-curling, wall-banging, sheet-tearing orgasms. parties understand that nothing will come of the romp. Men sometimes get too arrogant and I find that casual sex is a great tool for removing them from the pedestal they have put themselves on. Do you feel comfortable enough to suggest and try out new positions with your current partner? Yes, I’m free… kinky, as a matter of fact. It’s him I worry about. The other day, I wanted us to use handcuffs but he nearly ran away, I swear! Are you comfortable getting undressed in front of a man? Was there ever a time when you had reservations about your body? I’ve always had reservations about my body. I get a bit shy but my boyfriend seems to think that I’m the sexiest thing on two legs and that makes me feel
‘I play the starring role. I leave every little concern and worry at the door. Sex is all about me and not entirely about the man.’ that they need to work through. At the age of 27, what do you think of sex now? As much as people think that men are the only ones who think about sex around the clock, women do too. I, for one, think about it all day. Everything and anything reminds me of sex. At 27, I know exactly what I want and if you don’t produce the goods (and don’t want to be helped) then please get out of my shop. I used to think that casual sex with one partner made you a slut but I don’t think that any more. I find it very empowering as long as the two
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better. I worry about my thighs and tummy but my boobs on the other hand get me into so much trouble. But I’m slowly becoming more comfortable with my body. Are you and your partner comfortable to find out if you are meeting each other’s sexual expectations? We’re comfy, all right. He knows how mad I get if he climaxes first and is too tired to make me come. I always do the next best thing; play the piano until Beethoven rises from the dead (chuckles). What role do you play in making sure
that you get that mind-blowing orgasm? I play the starring role. I leave every little concern and worry at the door. Sex is all about me and not entirely about the man. You can call me selfish but I’m done with trying to prove to my man just how good I am in the sack.
Enthralling 30s PALESA NTSHINGILA, 34, EXECUTIVE ASSISTANT
How old were you when you started being sexually active? And how was your first sexual experience? I was 16 and it was very uncomfortable. It was one of those things I did only because friends were talking about it all the time and I badly wanted to fit in. There was no foreplay, just a bit of kissing and then he penetrated me. I didn’t even know what climaxing was then. Briefly tell us your opinions about sex in your 20s. I had gotten the hang of it, test-driven a few people and could even tell the difference between a big and a small penis. But I still relied on men for an orgasm. If the guy came first, that would be it for me and I would just lie there and wait for my cue to get dressed. I’d heard friends talk about climaxing but strangely enough I’d never experienced it until one day, when a guy friend and I suddenly had a heated moment. I finally reached the much talkedabout orgasm and I remember thinking that my bones were breaking. How are you finding sex in your 30s? Does it really get better with age? I actually feel sorry for my partner because I never ever get tired. I know exactly what I want, how I want it and I go for it. With age, I have also learnt the difference between sex and love-making. I enjoy both, but
PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
‘But once I recover, I want some more. My partner and I have what we call overindulgence days/nights where we just blow each other’s brains out.’ sometimes love-making just doesn’t hit the spot, in which case I’ll ask my partner to switch to a harder and faster mode. It has gotten way better with age. What is your secret to being sexually satisfied? I’m not sure if I ever do get satisfied; tired, maybe. But once I recover, I want some more. My partner and I have what we call overindulgence days/nights where we just blow each other’s brains out. He is a typical township guy; he will never surprise me with candles or roses but he knows how to push my buttons really well. When it comes to sex, what are you doing now that you didn’t do in your 20s? I take initiative. I used to be very embarrassed of getting on top of a man but now at 30, if I feel like some, I unzip my man’s pants, give him head, lubricate myself and ride him. Are you comfortable with your body and communicating your sexual needs to your partner? When you know your story, then stretchmarks and cellulite will be the last thing on your mind. Once my man and I get started, I tend to forget that I’m heavily pregnant. So yes, I’m very comfortable with my body.
Fiery 40s
REATLEGILE MAMPE, 46, UNIVERSITY LECTURER
How old were you when you started having sex? I was in my mid-20s and married. I had planned on saving it for the right guy but felt cheated because he had already been with three women before me. What are your opinions on sex now that you are over 40? Good sex is something that both partners work on. You must both be excited about each other and look forward to going to bed at night. When it comes to sex, what are you doing now that you weren’t doing in your 20s and 30s? In my 20s I was too embarrassed to even look at my husband’s penis. I just thought of his penis as this organ that was responsible for impregnating me. In my 30s something magical happened. I had a nymphomaniac for a best friend and she was always looking for ways to better her sex life. I wanted to rave as much as she did about sex, so I asked her for some advice. Her advice was simple: “Be spontaneous and free.” That was the biggest turning point in my sex life. Now I take the initiative and my partner is truly
my partner in all our bedroom crimes. What is your secret to being sexually satisfied? I’m aggressive about my orgasms, meaning I work hard for them. I don’t just lie there and let him do all the work. After giving birth to my first child in my late 20s, I used to have a lot of fears about not being able to enjoy sex anymore. But the older I got, the better my bedroom affairs became; hence my three other children were born when I was between the ages of 34 and 42 (chuckles). In your opinion, what is the biggest misconception about sex? That you must stop being sexually active when you get to a certain age. I know 50-somethingyear-olds who are still having a ball in the bedroom. You’ve been having sex with the same man for 18 years. How do you keep boredom at bay? There’s no limit to how creative you can be in bed. Yes, I may be 46, but my bedroom antics do not say anything about my age. Let’s just say that I have the flexibility of a gymnast. Someday when I have a sex talk with my kids, I will tell them to have sex with someone that they feel completely comfortable around. n
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SEX
There is so much written about strange and exciting places to make love, such as in the backseat of a car or in the great outdoors, but sometimes the most familiar places are usually the best. “Your bed is a logical place to make out. It’s comfortable and private,” says popular website ASKmen.com. By using your bed “there will be no need for awkwardly getting up and walking to another part of the house. It’s no wonder most of us think of our bedrooms when it’s time to get busy.”
S
Tips from a man
ince we’re celebrating Women’s Day this month, we thought it a good idea to get a first-hand male perspective on how they think they should please us! “Massage and touch is a sure way to get to a woman’s soft spot,” says 35-year-old KwaZulu-Natal attorney Sifiso Ntuli. “Also, take her out, spoil her, but you don’t have to spend a lot of cash. Just telling your woman she is beautiful is great. But the real key is to listen to what she has to say, to what she thinks and feels about things. This works every time.”
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‘YOU KNOW THAT LOOK WOMEN GET WHEN THEY WANT SEX? ME NEITHER!’ – US COMEDIAN, DREW CAREY SEX HOMEWORK!
In her book titled Pillowbook, Dr Eve gives some great ideas to get more in touch with what you are hoping to get out of a relationship or sex. “Draw a triangle. Label each side ‘passion’, ‘intimacy’ and ‘commitment’. Create your own picture of love at this moment of your life by shading the areas that define your present relationship. Create a triangle of how you would like your loving to be, if it’s different to your reality. If you are not in a relationship, do the exercise based on past loving and present desire.”
‘I F SEX IS SUCH A NATURAL PHENOMENON, HOW COME THERE ARE SO MANY BOOKS ON HOW TO DO IT?’
– US ACTRESS, BETTE MIDLER
WORDS Melinda Ferguson
Bed is still the best!
Q&A
MIND AND SOUL
Q: WHAT IS BRAIN FAG? A: You may not know what it is, but quite possibly, you’re suffering from it. Coined by the American Psychiatric Association in 1994, the term literally refers to the fact that your brain is tired. Symptoms of brain fag manifest mostly after heavy bouts of studying, which requires deep intellectual concentration. It can also occur if you’re overworked. The consequences of brain fag include difficulty concentrating, painful or watering eyes, blurred vision, head and neck pressure or pain, dizziness or weakness. SOURCE: Health24
ARE YOU FEELING ‘SAD’?
Feeling a little nervous before a big presentation, interview or meeting your lover’s parents is quite normal. However, for sufferers of social anxiety disorder (SAD), these situations become a terrifying ordeal. Also known as a social phobia, SAD refers to a permanent, intense fear and dislike of being around unfamiliar people, being observed by other people socially, or the fear of behaving in an embarrassing, ridiculous or humiliating way in front of others. If you feel extreme anxiety that is quite disproportionate to the actual situation you face, then it’s possible that you may have SAD. Unfortunately, because it’s normal for most people to feel anxious, fearful or nervous about social engagements or situations, true SAD is often undiagnosed. If your anxiety about being around people or involvement in social situations is interfering with your daily life, seek the advice of a counsellor or psychologist, who will be able to assist you with coping strategies. SOURCE: Health24
DID YOU KNOW?
etting enough sleep could keep you slender, say experts. An international conference on obesity concluded that people tended to eat 22 percent more than usual – about the size of a large hamburger – after a bad night’s sleep. The findings by the European Centre of Taste Science in Dijon were recently presented in Amsterdam in The Netherlands. Test group participants who slept for four hours had higher feelings of hunger than those who had slept for eight hours. Researchers say these results show that sleep deprivation increases food intake, which in turn could promote obesity. Statistics from the World Health Organisation reveal that 1,6 billion adults were recorded as overweight in 2005. Of these, at least 400 million were classified as obese. SOURCE: Sapa
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READ YOUR WAY TO WEALTH
Statistics show that only 10 percent of all books sold worldwide are actually read past the first chapter, and a mere four percent are read from cover to cover. In order to start creating wealth and learn the universal law of “cause and effect”, experts say you should start by reading everything you can – at least two or three times. Find books by successful businesspeople or motivational speakers. Stay tuned to current trends and find patterns in the tips presented by successful authors of self-help and finance books. You might not “get it” the first time around, so go back and read it again. Make notes. Generating wealth is about knowledge, so find the keys and start unlocking the secrets to rich rewards. SOURCE: www.inspiringwomen.co.za
Are you dreaming of reaching your life goals, but just can’t seem to get to the point where you start realising them? Life coach and facilitator Camilla Hazell-Harradine says there’s no reason why you can’t achieve your dreams. After all, nobody but yourself is standing in your way! She advises you take this seven-step approach to realising your goals and living the life you’ve always wanted: 1. Write down your goals. 2. Visualise your goals. 3. Overcome your limiting beliefs. 4. Affirm your goals. 5. Share your goals. 6. Take action to realise your goals. 7. Get a mentor or coach. Read more articles by Hazell-Harradine on camillaunlimited.wordpress.com/ or visit www.youunlimited.co.za. SOURCE: www.inspiringwomen.co.za
WORDS Beth Cooper PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
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R E L AT I O N S H I P S
FAMILY MATTERS et’s face it, every family has its fair share of dysfunctional relatives and, if truth be told, family gatherings would not be as memorable without some of these unforgettable characters. So where do you fit into the unavoidable madness that is family life? Are you still in denial? Perhaps the following encounters from some of our readers will jog your memory. THE SHINER They’ve “just arrived” in the world of money and will let anyone and everyone know about their new status. Favourite Line: “Oh, you just bought a new car. Hmm, I’m also upgrading my car, but I’ve just been having hassles with BMW.” In an African family there are clear lines of those who have money and those who are permanently struggling. The Shiner is the one who’s a bit like an outsider and has carved some success for himself. This is not a bad thing, yet the only problem is
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that he constantly needs his success to be re-affirmed and will find every possible way to boast about his success, and do it in that condescending tone. (Of course, the Shiner can be a female, too.) “My aunt’s husband is one of the most obnoxious people I know,” says Linda, 25, from Johannesburg. “He’s one of those with new money and won’t let anyone forget it. “When one of my cousins bought a new car, he told my cousin about all the negatives of his car. He, of course, had to add how he is thinking of buying a new car himself because so many people own the type of car he was driving, and the only delay was that the car dealer was giving him problems!” Handling The Shiner: Linda’s family pretends to be interested in their uncle’s stories and have sucessfully taken to uttering fake expressions of surprise, such as: “Oh, is it?” or “Hmm, wena na! (you’re the man!).” MOJALEFA (THE HEIR) This individual has not had much success and is probably still living with his mother,
yet feels it’s his birthright to inherit his parents’ home and pension money. Favourite Line: “My father left me this house. No-one can tell me anything!” This is a classic situation, at least where I come from. There’s an uncle (often the lastborn who was spoilt by the grandparents) in the family who feels entitled to everything despite not having worked for anything. “My uncle is a loser who hasn’t achieved much in his life and pretty much takes it out on the rest of the family,” says Sithembiso, 29, from Johannesburg. “He does strange things like cooking rice in a kettle and eating my baby cousin’s Nestum. Nevermind that, he’s also a kleptomaniac and is very rude to the rest of the family.” Sithembiso’s uncle seems to have been emasculated after losing his job when he was retrenched during the 1980s and has not recovered from it. As a result, he tries to get back his power by terrorising his family. The other flaw is that the uncle has a drinking habit, which, according to Sithembiso, turned him into a terrible liar who will stop
PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
Whether it’s a drunken uncle who makes lewd jokes in public, or a tactless aunt who blithely asks whether you’re still on your ‘medication’, Nonkululeko Godana discovers that when it comes to family ties, you can either turn it into a hangman’s noose or a beautiful big bow to wrap up your memories with.
at nothing to get money out of innocent family members to feed his habit. “Everyone keeps out of his way and avoids or ignores him. The only person who knows how to handle him is my aunt, who always manages to tell him off and usually ends up fighting with him,” adds Sithembiso. Handling The Heir: Give him more responsibility at family functions, so that he feels a bigger sense of worth, which, hopefully, will keep him from irritating everyone. This will boost his ego, which has clearly been bruised. Remember, fighting with him is only going to make things worse. THE ENTERTAINER She has a normal life and makes a decent
Handling The Entertainer: Loosen up and just join her! If you have any guests around, it is best to warn them about the strange activities that lie ahead. THE VICTIM Somewhat destructive, the victim is always trying to manipulate everyone in the family to gain sympathy. Favourite Line: “No one likes me in this family anyway!” Generally, in the African family there are always some members who are not well-off, but survive with the assistance of those who are. That’s fair, right? But then there are those “welfare recipients” who will go to any lengths to keep getting your hand-outs.
‘He does strange things like cooking rice in a kettle or even eating my baby cousin’s Nestum.’ living. The only problem is that she is a closet cabaret performer, which only gets unleashed after a good dose of booze. Favourite Line: (With droopy eyes and slurred speech) “I loooove aaall of yooou; you’re my faaaavourite family in the whole (burp) world! Every family has one... the silent, reasonably together individual who can barely utter a word, unless at a social gathering laden with booze. This is the budding performer, who will remind you that she gave up her dream of a career in the arts for a job in the nine-to-five rat race. “Whenever we’re at a family function and the drinks start flowing, we brace ourselves for a performance from my aunt,” says 26-year-old Busi, a resident of Newcastle. “It usually starts off with her singing her favourite song, Hlengiwe, and to this day, noone knows who the artist is. She then insists that we join her in singing and dancing in a line from the house to the gate. “At times she gets superstitious and takes a bucket of water and a broom and makes us jump over the broom. Then she’ll take the broom and sprinkle water in every corner of the house, in an attempt to ‘drive away evil spirits’,” recalls Busi. Busi’s aunt is a narrow-minded lady when she’s sober. She works at the local clinic as a nurse and has her own house in Soweto. But come the weekend, she transforms into a superstitious cabaret performer!
“I have a destructive cousin who does drugs and steals, and when confronted with his behaviour, plays the victim with tales of being unloved and secluded by the family,” explains Hayden, 23, from Cape Town. “It’s quite funny to see how easily he gets people to believe his nonsense. I ignore it because I know how he operates. He knows what he is doing is bad.” It’s one thing having a family member who is destructive and makes it easy for everyone to fight with him. But it’s a different ball game dealing with a person who uses emotional blackmail to gain people’s sympathy.” Handling The Victim: This is where tough love must come into play. Failing that, just get the strictest member of the family to sort them out! THE MORALIST If it has to be said, they will say it regardless of timing, occasion or people in attendance. This member of your family usually speaks the truth with as little diplomacy as possible. Favourite Line: “What do you expect from your mother; she wasn’t even sure who your father was when you were born!” It seems the older people get, the more prone they become to letting those pesky family secrets out in the open. These individuals have no qualms about blurting out family secrets, provided it’s not their own, of course.
“My beloved grandmother has that golden years’ honesty thing going on; saying what she feels right there and then, regardless of who’s around and without thinking about how you might take it!” says Lieketseng, 27, from Soweto. “On the one hand it’s great because that kind of honesty is good, but when there are people around who aren’t family, it gets embarrassing. My grandmother just speaks her mind without even holding back on the swearing!” adds Lieketseng. Handling The Moralist: Memorise the church choruses and hymns and start belting them out as soon as she starts preaching about hedonism. This should throw her off, or at least place you in her good books.
JOKES ASIDE Dealing with these types of people can be quite a challenge, not only in families but also in social settings. The important thing to bear in mind is that it’s not always about you (the person who is at the receiving end) but often it is about the other person and their need to control others, to assert themselves, feel important or accepted, or to deal with hurt, anger or disappointment in others or themselves. Clinical psychologist Omphile Sebitloane suggests the following methods in dealing with difficult relatives: Ignore: Only use this method provided the other person’s behaviour is not destructive or obstructive to others. Remember, you may not be able to change how they behave, but you do have control over your reaction to them. Confront: Be calm and point out, factually, what the impact of the person’s behaviour on yourself and the family is. In all likelihood, the person will become more defensive and aggravated, which means you may have to consider that the whole family confront the person together, if they are all affected. Assert: You need to know yourself well, what you believe in and value, what you would or wouldn’t do, and state your point calmly but firmly. If you are close to the person, point out your observation by saying; “You can change and we are here to support you…” However, don’t be drawn into their issues. They must know the limits of your assistance and should be encouraged to take responsibility for their own life and actions. If their behaviour is extreme, recommend that they seek help. n
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? VERow AGE IS NOTHING MOTHER OR LO sh to pt m te at n a desperate that BUT A NUMBER and husbands our boyfriends d up In a time when there is a significant shortage of men, why do women still feel the need to gossip about older women who shack up with younger partners? Here are some celebrity couples who’ve made it work: ■
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The designer and owner of Stoned Cherrie, Nkhensani Nkosi, is two years older than her hubby Zam. They are also among South Africa’s most successful business couples. American acting pair Nicole Ari Parker and Boris Kodjoe have been together for 12 years. Nicole is three years older than her delectable hubby. Demi Moore is 15 years older than Ashton Kutcher. They too are proof that age should never be an issue. Halle Berry also makes the growing “older woman-younger man” trend look really hot. She is 10 years older than the father of her baby, Canadian model Gabriel Aubry. R&B muso Usher Raymond is eight years younger than his wife, Tameka Foster-Raymond.
we could en we love them, ng es between lovi blurring the lin t how Bu . em th g rin them and mothe ing you are becom do you know if the er sw an Simple really, lt. su re his mommy? ur yo k ec ns and ch tio es qu g in w llo fo
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Do you fake your orgasm to make him feel like he’s a tiger in the sack and because you don’t want to bruise his ego? Do you make excuses like “he’s in a bad mood”, or “things aren’t going well in his life” when he treats you like trash in front of your friends? Do you pull yourself back from shining to your fullest because you’re trying to nurse his issues of inadequacy? Do you agree with him even when he speaks or does something that you’re strongly against, just so you can keep the peace? Are you doing all the cleaning, laundry and cooking? Does he keep mentioning how his healthy lifestyle falls apart when you’re not around? Do you protect him from making painful but necessary decisions? Do you stand by and watch him indulge in alcohol and illegal substances to help him forget his problems?
Sister, if you answered yes to any of the questions above, then it is time for you to learn to draw the line between loving and spoiling your man!
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If you’d like to stand a chance of winning these great prizes, SMS the brand name, Ingrid Millet, your full name, surname, and residential and email addresses to 34688, or post your full name, surname and residential and email addresses to Ingrid Millet Give-away, PO Box 784696, Sandton 2146. All entries must reach us by the closing date, 15 August 2009. Winners will be notified telephonically by Ingrid Millet within 30 days of the closing date. SMSs are charged at R2 each. Premium rates apply. Free rates do not apply. Terms and conditions apply.
WORDS Kemong Mopedi PHOTOGRAPHS True Love Library; Tom and Dee Ann McCarthy/Corbis/Great Stock
R E L AT I O N S H I P S
H E A LT H
IS YOUR BODY? Victor Griddle speaks to experts who agree that your bodily age could have little to do with the number of candles on your next birthday cake.
re you one of those people who get complimented on “how well you carry your years”, or have you seen people who look way older than what they really are? And what about that saying, you are as old as you feel? Experts on the issue agree that your bodily age could have little to do with the number of years you have accumulated. For, although your age might be 40, your heart could be 54, your muscles 60, and your brain three-score years or more, according to a study by the Uni-
versity of Miami Medical School. On the other hand, your body might be in such good shape that it is far younger than your years suggest. A woman of 70 could have a heart age of 50 or less if her lifestyle has kept her, literally, young at heart. One of the quickest ways of determining the age of your body is to notice the time it takes for a superficial skin wound to heal. At the age of 10, a wound should heal completely in 20 days. At 20, this will have increased to 31 days, and at 30 gone up to more than 40 days. By the age of 50, a wound will take 75 days to get better and by the age of 65, the average is 100 days.
‘ALTHOUGH YOUR ACTUAL AGE MIGHT BE 40, YOUR HEART COULD BE 54, YOUR MUSCLES 60, AND YOUR BRAIN THREE-SCORE YEARS...’
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So, if at the age of 40 a slight wound heals in 30 days or less, you have a 20-year-old skin. Body tissues also age at a steady rate. As they get older, they tend to retain less water and become dry and wrinkled instead of plump and firm. As time passes, substances such as cholesterol and calcium tend to be stored in the cells rather than being dissolved and passing through the system, as they should. The more they tend to be stored, the older your body is. Radiation techniques can now tell doctors exactly how old, chemically, your tissues are. Artery age can also be scientifically assessed. A tiny amount
WORDS Profiles International Media PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
HOW OLD
H E A LT H
HOW TO STAY YOUNG AT HEART
of radioactive sodium can be injected into a vein and a Geiger counter placed over the chest to see how long sodium takes to travel to the heart. The more clogged up the veins, the longer it will take. At age 20, the travelling time should be 20 seconds, but if it’s 65 seconds or more, the arteries are suffering from extreme old age. When premature artery hardening sets in, blood will flow through the chest at the slow speed of an elderly person’s, whatever the person’s actual age, says Professor N. Berrill of McGill University in Canada.
BEAT THE BODY CLOCK eart rate can also indicate age. At birth, the heart beats between 130 and 140 times a minute and at the age of 25 slows down to 70. This is the adult rate, which should continue through life. If it slows down further, you know the heart is getting on in age. Many people need glasses, especially for reading, after the age of 40. This is partly because fluid is not retained to
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the same extent in the lenses of the eyes. Cholesterol, instead, tends to accumulate and eventually interferes with vision. Lack of moisture in the system generally also make the ears less sensitive to sound. Lungs can also age at an unrelated rate to your real age. The older your lungs, the slower the rate at which your body expels nitrogen, according to new research released at California University. An adolescent boy might get rid of extra nitrogen in 15 minutes, whereas it could take a 65-year-old man five hours to expel the same amount. According to ageing expert and bestselling author Dr Michael F. Roizen, you have the power to turn your body clock faster or slower. “It all depends on what you decide to do with your body and what you put into it,” he says. “For example, a 50-year-old who smokes and eats chopped liver and sausage may actually have the body of a 65-year-old because of her bad habits. “On the other hand, a 50-year-old who eats well, avoids toxins, and takes care of her body with moderate exercise could have the body and health of a 36-year-old.” He adds that, of course, no-one can stop the ageing process, but you can
make adjustments to your life that will have a dramatic effect on your life expectancy and the quality of life by controlling your blood pressure, avoiding cigarettes, exercising 30 minutes a day, controlling stress and following a healthy diet. He offers the following diet to help you live longer and enjoy increased energy: ◆ Eat nine handfuls of fruits and vegetables daily; at least 23 grams of nuts; wholegrain breads and cereals that contain fibre. ◆ Eat fish at least three times a week. ◆ Avoid processed foods that contain trans and saturated fats; white foods like creamed sauces, white bread, white rice, and simple sugar, and products containing high-fructrose corn syrup. But remember, the biggest elixir of youth is stress reduction. If you have a crinkly face lined with trouble, you can be fairly sure your arteries are crinkly, too. It is also said that premature creases in the ear lobes could indicate future heart trouble, and that your skin, lungs and heart could all become younger as you get older, but within certain limits, of course.
WORDS Profiles International Media PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
1. Reduce negative stress by limiting unpleasant tasks to the absolute minimum and offset the ageing process by practicing relaxation and meditation. 2. Stop smoking. A heavy smoker could halve the risk of having heart attacks within five years of quitting this habit. 3. Watch your diet. Eating meat ages you, but plenty of fruit and vegetables keep the digestive system in shape. There is no evidence to support claims that eating margarine makes you live longer. 4. Moderate exercise helps. If you aren’t very active, muscles begin to seize up quickly. Arthritis can be kept at bay by practicing abdominal, rather than shallow breathing, says the doctor.
PROMOTION
LET’S HEAR IT FOR CALCIUM! Dairy products are packed with lots of calcium, essential vitamins, good protein and other minerals. Three servings of dairy a day will help you build strong bones and healthy teeth. You Need Dairy Every Day Of Your Life! his is quite a statement, isn’t it? The truth is that dairy is important for bone health development. Bone mass is the sum of all minerals in the bone, of which calcium is a main component. Bone mass is built from birth to the age of 30 and dairy products provide the calcium to ensure that the bone mass is optimised. After the age of 30, loss of bone mass starts occurring, and the easiest way to help limit this is with daily consumption of dairy, as the calcium in dairy is easily absorbed by the body.
Did You Know? ■ ■ ■
Calcium from dairy is well absorbed by the body. Bone is a living tissue that needs regular exercise to make it stronger. The combination of calcium from dairy and regular physical activity keeps your bones fit and strong.
Why Is Dairy Important? ■ ■ ■
Dairy products, such as milk, cheese, maas and yoghurt contain calcium. Dairy products are also packed with protein, essential vitamins and minerals. Dairy products offer terrific nutrition.
3-A-DAY™
+ Yoghurt 200ml
+ Milk 250ml
Don’t Forget The Dairy!
Do yourself a favour and get into the routine of having dairy three times a day. Choose dairy products that suit your lifestyle and taste preference, such as cheese, milk, yoghurt or maas. This will ensure your bones and teeth are strong enough to help you live a healthy and active life! An initiative by the Consumer Education Project of Milk SA. For more information, visit www.dairy.co.za.
Maas 200ml
PHOTOGRAPHY Renelle Rampersad
Eat any three dairy products every day to make sure your body gets enough calcium.
h e a lt h
DID YOU KNOW?
Guavas are nature’s own winter remedy for colds and flu! A powerhouse of Vitamin C, they ward off viruses, boost our immune systems and are a great source of iron and dietary fibre, as well as traces of B-carotene, calcium and potassium. Containing just 156 kilojoules per fruit, they’re also a top choice for weight-loss and help tone and tighten the skin, thanks to their high astringent content. SOURCE: GC Communications
HERBS FOR INFERTILITY
erbs have helped keep us healthy for thousands of years. They’ve been prescribed to boost immunity, enhance healing, bring pain relief and balance hormones – and now they’re enjoying a revival in the 21st century. Scientists from Stanford University School of Medicine published trials showing that a herbal supplement, FertilityBlend, contributed to a third of women participants becoming pregnant within five months, and increased sperm count and mobility in male test subjects. Project co-author Lynn Westphal says that depending on the cause of infertility, when herbs are prescribed in the right proportions, they can help couples to optimise their chances of conceiving naturally. Infertility can be caused by hormonal imbalances, ovulation problems, poor sperm production and endometrial problems. These can be exaggerated by lifestyle, poor eating habits and stress. At the start of treatment, couples are advised to stop smoking and drinking, exercise regularly, lose weight and learn to de-stress! FertilityBlend is available for both men and women and contains specific ingredients for each. The product is available countrywide at Sparkport, Vitacare pharmacies, health shops and from the distributors Nuvida. For information, testimonials and clinical study results, visit www.nuvida.co.za or email Elizabeth Savage on info@nuvida.co.za. SOURCE: Freebees
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Children are particularly susceptible to colds and flu during the winter months, but encouraging them to take vitamins can be a drag. Gummyvites is a delicious new range from TLC, packed with essential nutrients to build their immune systems and help combat a range of ailments. Soft, chewy and tasty, they’re fun to take and are available in propolis and echinacea, iron, multi-vitamin and vitamin C. Each Gummyvite contains 60mg of vitamin C and is equivalent to eating five oranges. For more information, call 021 425 4008 or visit www.tlccosmetics.com.
HOLISTIC HELP FOR DIABETICS Could supplements be used to complement conventional treatment for the management of Type 2 diabetes? Scientists are researching the possibility of enhancing control of the disease with supplementation through tackling the ineffective control of blood glucose levels, while also helping with management of factors influencing the disease and associated risks. A new product, Glucobetix Plus, containing cinnamon, alpha lipoic acid, chromium picolinate and vanadium, aims to help improve blood glucose control. For more information, visit www.diabetix.co.za. SOURCE: Freebees
WORDS Beth Cooper PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
COLD-BUSTING CHEWS
h e a lt h
WHAT A HEADACHE!
shocking 91,7 percent of child headache sufferers can trace the cause to their caffeine intake in the form of cola drinks, a Tel Aviv University study has found. “Caffeine is both a diuretic and vasoconstrictor,” says Dr Elliot Shevel, chairperson of the South African division of the International Headache Society. “This means that it causes dehydration, which sets off headaches, and it also impacts on the arteries, which in turn results in migraine.” The study tested 36 children over a period of five years and found that the average amount of cola guzzled by adolescents was a staggering 11 litres per week. Participants were encouraged to achieve gradual withdrawal, which led to complete cessation of all headaches in 33 of the children. Caffeine is a highly addictive substance and also causes children to become hyperactive, says Dr Shevel. Parents and paediatricians need to encourage children to try healthier drinks. Children who suffer from headaches caused by caffeine should reduce their intake gradually, as this will help reduce withdrawal headaches. For more information on the study, call Mary-Lee Cantor on 011 484 0933.
JOIN THE DRIVE TO IMMUNISE Family-friendly products for a happy planet South Africa is catching up with the tsunami of interest in all things organic and environmentally safe. Another range of products has hit our shelves, offering safe cleaning materials and personal hygiene goodies such as shower gels, drain cleaners, dishwashing liquid and vegetable and fruit washes. The company embraces a global trend towards holistic living, offering products free of toxic chemicals to support a “safe, sustainable, organic lifestyle” for present and future generations. The range includes Careco personal hygiene products, Enviro Care household products and Biologix – bacterial and enzymatic cleaners, which are biodegradable. SOURCE: Freebees
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POSITIVE HIV NEWS In June 2009 positive news was flashed all over South Africa with the first upbeat news about HIV/ Aids in a long time. According to the results of the third South African HIV National Prevalence Survey, released by the Human Sciences Research Council, South Africa’s HIV prevalence rate remains stable at 11 percent and there have been significant reductions in HIV infections among children and young people. On the downside, though, the overall HIV infection rate among people aged 15 to 49 has inched up in the last six years, with almost 17 percent of people in this group now infected (up from 15,6 percent in 2002).
Immunising your child is perhaps one of the single most-important steps you as a parent can take to ensure your child grows up to be strong and healthy. That is why 3 to 9 August is so important, as South Africa marks National Immunisation Week – a time to reflect on how thousands of lives are saved each year through immunisation. Vaccines work to safeguard your child from illnesses and death caused by infectious diseases. While newborn babies are immune to many diseases, thanks to the antibodies their mothers passed on to them during pregnancy, their immunity is not comprehensive and most young children are not immune to diphtheria, pertussis (whooping cough), polio, tetanus, hepatitis B, or Haemophilus influenzae type b. A vaccine will help prepare your child to fight these serious and often fatal diseases.
WORDS Beth Cooper and Melinda Ferguson PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
SOURCE: Migraine Research Institute and The Headache Clinic.
The quest for your little ones to have pearly whites just got easier with Mandy Collins extracting the do’s and dont’s of dental care.
OPEN WIDE
any people are surprised to learn that they should start brushing their children’s teeth as soon as the first one appears. According to a local expert, however, your child’s dental health begins even earlier – at conception. Professor Sidney Setzer, head of the Paedodontic Division of the Department of Paediatric and Restorative Dentistry at Wits Dental School, says you should be concerned with your child’s dental health when you fall pregnant. “And that means taking
multi-vitamins and fluoride,” he says. “Your gynaecologist will prescribe the vitamins, and you need to take four Xymafluor tablets daily. What people don’t realise is that at 16 weeks of pregnancy, the tooth buds start to develop, and if you take fluoride – about 40 percent of which will pass through the placenta to the foetus – it strengthens the teeth right from the beginning.” You should continue with those four Xymafluor tablets while you breastfeed, and your child should have one tablet, crushed between two teaspoons, for the first year of life, says Prof. Setzer. “In their second year, they should have two tablets, and then from year three they can have three until age six, more or less, when their first teeth erupt.” And then you continue with three to four tablets a day until they are about
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PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
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PA R E N T I N G
13 – if you see white spots on their teeth when they first erupt, then cut back a bit; remember there’s fluoride in the water and it varies in concentration around the country. It’s vital you start brushing your child’s teeth twice a day as soon as the first one appears. This can be tricky, so Prof. Setzer suggests you use a face cloth or a piece of gauze at first, and just wipe the teeth clean. But there are excellent “first toothbrush” sets made by Pigeon, which he recommends. They have safety rings around them that prevent your child from sticking the brush down the throat, and are soft and rubbery. Essentially, you just pop a little toothpaste – no more than the size of a pea – on the rubbery bits and let your baby chew on it. “It’s important to use a kiddies’ toothpaste, because they have less fluoride in them than the adult versions, and children do tend to swalOrthodontics is a specialised field of low more toothpaste dentistry for correcting skew teeth, which than they should,” ex- doesn’t only improve one’s appearance; it may even help with functional problems plains Prof. Setzer. You should aim to such as speech problems. We’ve all seen children with “train tracks” on their teeth brush your child’s teeth – it’s really not as gruesome as it looks, twice a day if possible, and orthodontists achieve wonderful but at least once a day, results Obviously, having your child’s baby last thing before he or teeth corrected is not necessary, but if she goes to bed. And if the permanent teeth are skew, you might your baby has to sleep want to consider orthodontics for your with a bottle, then water child. “Here you should be guided by Many people pay or weak, black, unsweet- your dentist,” advises Prof. Setzer, “and ened rooibos tea are the follow his or her recommendations. little attention to Generally orthodontics are performed on best options. children who have most of their permanent their children’s milk As your children grow teeth, but sometimes they might be neces- teeth because, they older and become more sary a little earlier. And rather too early reason, they are going to fall out interested in doing things than too late.” anyway, and one for themselves, allow often sees young children with a them to brush their own teeth, but ensure mouth full of black, rotting teeth. However, you do a quick re-brush when they’re finthe primary or milk teeth are very important ished, as they will probably just chew on because they keep space in the mouth for the toothbrush, and not be terribly effective the adult teeth that will follow. at cleaning their teeth. “You should superhis is particularly important vise your children’s tooth-brushing routine when the adult molars erupt. until they are around eight years old to The primary molars are ensure they do a good job,” advises Prof. wider than the first adult Setzer, “and you should also floss the teeth pre-molars, and if the prifor them for the same period.” mary molars aren’t there, This can also be awkward, as trying to the back teeth will tend to get your fingers inside that little mouth is move forward into the gap. very difficult. “The best way is to sit on a Then, when the adult prechair with the child’s head in your lap – as molars need to grow out, there’s no space if they were at the dentist – and then you for them. All of this means that taking care can floss from the top.”
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of those little milk teeth, and keeping them free of decay, is an important part of your child’s health. To prevent tooth decay, you need to monitor your child’s sugar and starch intake as much as possible. These foods convert into acid, which eats away at the tooth enamel. Try to give your children cooled boiled tap water to drink between meals and well-diluted fruit juice or squashes at mealtimes only. Also avoid baby foods with added sugar, and ask your pharmacist for sugar-free medicines. If you can, wean your baby onto a feeding mug at six months, as drinking from a bottle increases the risk of tooth decay. And if possible, brush your children’s teeth after meals that are high in carbohydrates.
BRUSHING AND FLOSSING
Good daily brushing and flossing really are the cornerstones of good dental health, so
PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
WHAT IS ORTHODONTICS?
PROMOTION
esearch shows that your baby’s very busy tummy can expand and contract by up to eight centimetres while eating and digesting, breathing, laughing, playing and moving throughout the day and night. The majority of the effect of this tummy expansion is felt at the sides of the waist, whilst minimal stretch or expansion occurs at the back. Stretchy sides on a nappy are therefore more effective than stretchy backs because stretch at the sides is where it’s needed most to help prevent a “gappy nappy” all around the waist, even at the back. Stretch at the sides helps prevent leakage and runny mess escaping, and provides the best all-round fit for your baby. Leaking nappies disturb your baby’s peaceful sleep, and uncomfortably tightfitting nappies inhibit freedom of movement in play. Pampers knows just how important it is for babies to be comfortable in sleep and play, which is why they have launched New Pampers Active Baby with stretch.
PHOTOGRAPH Great Stock
The “Caterpillar Stretch” on the sides stretches with baby’s changing tummy, allowing for a better fitting and more comfortable nappy. The soft, stretchy sides stretch back into shape to help protect against gaps, leaks and escaping runny mess for up to 12 hours, and allow for baby’s improved sleep and movement, and therefore improved development. New Pampers Active Baby with stretch has amazing stretchy sides for an unbeatable all-round fit and comfort.
STRETCH WHERE IT MATTERS MOST New Pampers Active Baby with stretch for a more comfortable all-round fit.
Thanks to Lucy The Caterpillar, Pampers Active Baby now has caterpillar stretch on the sides – where it matters most. Pampers has teamed up with the creators of Beautiful Creatures to bring the Lucy character to life and have created a range of competitions and free on-pack giveaways, available in selected stores through to December 2009.
Pampers Active Bab stretch is av y with sizes 3 to 6 ailable in , in small to larg a range of e packs. For maxim um stretch, loo out for Lucy The Caterp k illar on speciall y marked Pampers p acks in store!
Lucy lives on a large Mulberry leaf and, just like your baby, her favourite activities are eating, sleeping and singing, but most importantly, she loves stretching. And much the same way that Lucy flexes her body while moving around objects, so too will New Pampers Active Baby with stretch. For more information, visit www.pampers.co.za.
PA R E N T I N G
it’s important to do them as effectively as possible. To brush effectively, hold the toothbrush at about 45˚ to the surface of the teeth. And be systematic – start at one side of the mouth and move to the other, ensuring you brush every surface of the teeth: front and back, as well as the biting or chewing edge. Having the right tools also help – don’t make the common mistake of choosing a hard toothbrush, as you’ll remove enamel (the protective, hard surface of your teeth) and bruise your gums. Instead, choose a brush with a head no longer than 20mm and nylon bristles that are medium-soft rather than hard, with rounded tips. You should also consider getting an electric toothbrush, which will clean the teeth much better than you ever could, and is very gentle on the gums. While they can be quite expensive, they really do make the job much easier, and are particularly helpful for children. Many electric toothbrushes also help you to determine how long you should be brushing for, because they change sounds after the correct time period. Most of us don’t brush our teeth for nearly long enough – we should brush
WATCH THE CARB INTAKE If you want your children to have good teeth,
then you need to watch the frequency of their carbohydrate intake, says Prof. Setzer. “We all have bacteria in our mouth, but when they come into contact with sugars and carbohydrates, they become acidic and result in caries (cavities) or tooth decay. “If you are going to give your child a sweet, rather give them chocolate, as it dissolves quickly and the saliva can buffer its effects on the teeth. The longer your teeth are in contact with carbohydrates, the greater the risk of caries. “And remember, giving a child diet cola instead of Coke makes no difference, as they are equally acidic. Let them drink weak, black rooibos or water instead. A child can only get used to drinking something if you give it to them,” advises Prof. Setzer.
for about three minutes – so this is a really good feature! Flossing is another area many people neglect, but we should be flossing every time we brush our teeth to get rid of debris that lodges inbetween the teeth. My dentist always says you don’t have to floss all your teeth – just the ones you want to keep! The basics are as follows – take about 50cm of floss and twist it around the fingers of both hands. Then draw it gently between your teeth and move upwards from the base to the
Some dentists recommend a first visit when the child’s first teeth erupt, but most will agree that it’s impractical to take a six- or nine-month-old child to the dentist. If possible, however, when your toddler is old enough to understand what it’s all about, take him or her with you when you have your check-up. This will introduce the child to the environment and they’re likely to be fascinated by all the lights and gadgets. When your child is about two-and-a-half years old, arrange the first check-up, but ensure you explain what it’s all about. Most dentists are very child-friendly and will make an extra effort to make your child feel comfortable. Thereafter, your child should have a check-up every six months. Not everyone can afford to fork out the big bucks for private dentistry, but don’t despair. The government provides free dentistry to pregnant women and children under the age of six, so enquire at your local hospital or clinic about this service. It really is important for every family member to have two check-ups a year. ■
&
If your child’s a fan of Sue Bentley’s popular Magic Kitten and Magic Puppy series then you won’t want to miss her latest series offering, Magic Ponies (Penguin, R70). Also for horse lovers, the exciting Mustang Mountain adventure series by Sharon Siamon (Penguin, R80) has just been released. If your son is a Ben 10 fan then look out for the range of Ben 10 books including Ben 10 Storybooks (Penguin, R65) and the Ben 10 All Action Stories and Flicker Book (Penguin, R85).
eat fish QwCahinleI I’m pregnant? A
PAMPER YOUR ANGEL An independent baby manufacturer, Little Angels is hoping to excite the market with new baby products from their range. Ranging from baby shampoo, baby butter, and hair and bath products, Little Angels products have natural extracts of rooibos, lavender and chamomile. There is also a room mist and a room disinfectant for cleanliness and the ultimate baby pamper. TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
REGULAR CHECK-UPS
Q A
ON THE BOOKSHELF
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top of each tooth. Curve it into an arch around one tooth, and then clean the surface of the neighbouring tooth – it’s vital that you clean each tooth individually.
Yes. Many types of fish such as snoek, salmon, butterfish, macka rel, sardines, pilchards and herring fatty acids which are ben contain omega-3 eficial for you and your unborn baby. The Nutrition Information Centre at the Universit y of Stellenbosch (NICUS) recommends eating two to three portions of fatty fish per week during pregnancy to ensure you get enough omega-3 fatty acids. But not all fish are benefi cial during pregnancy and breastfeedin g. Specifically fish that contain high levels of me rcu developing nervous system ry can harm the of an unborn child or young baby. Steer cle ar of swordfish, shark, king mackerel and tilefi sh as these larger fish tend to have higher lev els of mercury than oth ers . Shr imp , can ned tun a (in bri ne) , salmon and snoek are bet ter options as they are lower in mercury. SOURCE: NICUS
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GO WEST! Known for its richness and variety, West African cuisine offers a taste sensation that bursts on the tongue. In the third instalment of our series featuring dishes from the renowned cookbook Cooking From Cape To Cairo, Tumelo Sebopa brings you cuisine from Ghana, Senegal and Nigeria. Photography by Graeme Borchers.
KOSAIN DOYA (FRIED GRATED YAM)
(Makes 12) ■ ½ medium yam, peeled ■ 1 large onion, grated ■ 10ml (2 tsps) black pepper ■ 1 small tomato, diced ■ 15ml (1T) flour ■ 1 egg, beaten
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■ Salt and dried thyme to taste ■ Oil for deep-frying METHOD: 1. In a bowl, grate yam and add the rest of the ingredients except oil. 2. Heat oil in a frying pan, shape yam mixture into small balls or drop tablespoonful of mixture into the
hot oil. Fry on all sides until golden brown and crisp. Serve hot as a snack. Cook’s Tip: West African ingredients are available from the Congolese Market in Yeoville; the Housewives Market in Pretoria West, and Green Market Square in Cape Town.
OGBONO STEW WITH EBA
(Serves 4) ■ 60ml (4T) palm oil ■ 1 onion, chopped ■ 2 green chillies, chopped ■ 1 green pepper, chopped ■ 2 tomatoes, chopped ■ 500ml (2 cups) water ■ 2 chicken stock cubes ■ 500g chicken or meat ■ 30ml (2T) ground ogbono ■ 500g fresh fish, optional (bones removed and cleaned)
■ Salt and black pepper to taste EBA ■ Boiling water ■ Gari ■ Salt to taste METHOD: 1. Heat half the palm oil and fry onions, chillies and green pepper until soft. Add tomatoes, water, stock and cook for a minute. 2. Add chicken or meat and simmer gently for 15 minutes. 3. Mix ogbono with remaining oil and add
to meat, stirring well to avoid lumps. Cook gently for 5 minutes. 4. If using fish, add to mixture, season and cook over medium heat for 20 minutes or until desired thickness. 5. To make Eba: Bring water to boil, lower heat and add the gari, stirring constantly until the mixture has thickened. 6. Serve stew with eba. Cook’s Tip: Ground ogbono is a thickening agent and gari is dried cassava grains.
FROM NIGERIA
‘Many different spices, herbs and flavourings are used together with palm oil and groundnut oil to create deeply flavoured sauces and soups – the perfect accompaniment to lavish and colourful Nigerian feasts.’ — Cooking From Cape To Cairo true lovE august 2009
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FROM SENEGAL
‘Traditionally, food is cooked on charcoal burners to ensure that it cooks slowly and that the flavours blend to perfection.’ — Cooking From Cape To Cairo
PASTELLE
(Makes 12) ■ 250ml (1 cup) flour ■ Salt to taste ■ 1 egg, beaten
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■ Water ■ 15ml (1T) oil FILLING ■ 1 onion, grated ■ 30ml (2T) parsley, chopped ■ 1 garlic clove, crushed ■ 250ml (1 cup) white fish, cooked ■ Salt and pepper to taste METHOD: 1. Mix together flour, salt, egg and
enough water to form stiff dough. Pour oil over the dough and leave to soak for 30 minutes. 2. Knead dough to incorporate the oil. Roll out thinly, cut dough into strips and then squares. 3. To make filling: Combine all ingredients and purée in a blender until smooth. Place a teaspoon of filling on each pastry square, seal and deep fry in hot oil.
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special occasions
POULET YASSA (CHICKEN IN ONION SAUCE) (Serves 4-6) ■ 4 onions, sliced ■ 125ml (½ cup) lemon juice ■ Salt and black pepper to taste ■ 3ml (½ tsp) cayenne pepper ■ 45ml (3T) oil ■ 1 large chicken, cut into portions ■ 45ml (3T) English mustard
METHOD: 1. Mix together onions, lemon juice and seasoning. Leave to marinate for 30 minutes. 2. In a large saucepan, heat oil and fry onions until translucent. Meanwhile, coat the chicken pieces with mustard, salt and pepper. Marinate for 15 minutes. 3. Deep-fry or oven-roast the chicken until browned and cooked through. Add the chicken to the onion sauce. 4. Cook gently to blend the flavours; the longer, the better. Moisten with water if it cooks dry. Serve hot over cooked rice.
MAFFE DIAGREOU (LAMB WITH PEANUT AND OKRA SAUCE)
(Serves 4-6) ■ 45ml (3T) oil ■ 500g lamb, cut into cubes ■ 2 onions, chopped ■ 2 tomatoes, peeled and chopped ■ 75g (5T) tomato paste ■ 100g (7T) peanut butter ■ 2 sweet potatoes, peeled and quartered ■ 100g (7T) fresh okra, trimmed and chopped ■ 1 red sweet pepper, chopped ■ Salt and pepper to taste ■ 500ml (2 cups) water METHOD: 1. Heat oil and brown the meat. Remove from pot and keep warm. Add onions to the pot and sauté until translucent. 2. Add all remaining ingredients, except water, and stir-fry for about 5 minutes. 3. Add water, return lamb to the pot and simmer covered for about an hour. Serve over rice.
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special occasions
GOAT MEAT LIGHT SOUP WITH FUFU
(Serves 4-6) ■ 1kg goat meat ■ 1 onion, finely chopped ■ 15ml (1T) crushed ginger ■ Salt to taste ■ 1,25ℓ (5 cups) water ■ 3ml (½ tsp) cayenne pepper ■ 2 tomatoes, chopped ■ 1 brinjal, peeled and chopped ■ ½ x 410g can butter or lima beans ■ 4 fufu balls
FROM GHANA
‘Ghanaian food has a distinct flavour: most dishes are delicately spiced with chillies, garlic, palm oil and peanut sauce.’ — Cooking From Cape To Cairo
METHOD: 1. Rub goat meat with onion, ginger and salt. In a saucepan, pour 1 cup of water and cook meat for 30 minutes, stirring occasionally. 2. Add the rest of the water and bring to the boil. Add cayenne pepper, tomatoes and brinjals. 3. Cover and cook until the meat falls off the bones. Add butter or lima beans. Cook’s Tip: Fufu balls are prepared from boiled cassava, which is pounded to a pulp. It is then puréed until it is free of lumps, after which it is shaped into balls the size of golf balls.
PEANUT BISCUITS
METHOD: 1. Caramelise sugar by heating it over low heat until it has melted. Add peanuts and stir to blend. Rub table-top or chopping board with butter and spread the mixture on it. 2. Mix glucose syrup and water well, and pour over peanut mixture. 3. Roll the mixture out with a rolling pin and cut into attractive shapes. Leave to dry and serve as dessert.
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STYLIST Taryne Jakobi and Mokgadi Itsweng
(Makes 12) ■ 250ml (1 cup) sugar ■ 750ml (3 cups) peanuts ■ 15ml (1T) butter or margarine ■ 30ml (2T) glucose syrup ■ 60ml (4T) water
promotion
Koo creditcrunch beaters
COPYWRITER Hayden Horner RECIPE and STYLING Tumelo Sebopa PHOTOGRAPHY Renelle Rampersad
Delicious and easy-to-prepare meals are well within your budget during this recession, all thanks to KOO.
One-Pot Chicken (Serves 4) n 30ml (2T) sunflower oil n 8 chicken drumsticks n 1 red onion, sliced n 4 tomatoes, chopped n 15ml (1T) sugar n 10ml (2 tsps) balsamic vinegar n 410g (1 can) KOO Fresh Garden Peas n 410g (1 can) KOO Whole Kernel Corn n Handful of coriander, finely chopped
Method:
1. In a pan, heat oil and fry chicken until golden on all sides. 2. Add onion and fry until soft. 3. Add chopped tomatoes, sugar and balsamic vinegar. Cover and simmer for 10 to 12 minutes. 4. Add KOO Fresh Garden Peas and KOO Whole Kernel Corn. Sprinkle with coriander and serve hot. SERVING TIP: Can be served with fresh crusty bread or rice.
e v e r y d ay f o o d
GLOWING GOODNESS
Maintaining radiant skin and a youthful appearance just got easier with Tumelo Sebopaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s healthy meals packed with age-defying ingredients. LEMON BUTTERFLYFISH (Serves 4) n 60ml (4T) butter n 1 onion, finely chopped n 15ml (1T) parsley, finely chopped n 1 lemon, juiced n 15ml (1T) lemon rind n 4 Butterflyfish fillets n Pinch of salt and freshly ground black pepper n Lemon slices to garnish METHOD: 1. Preheat the oven grill on moderate heat. In a small saucepan, melt butter and sautĂŠ onions until translucent.
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2. Add parsley, lemon juice, rind and simmer through. Remove saucepan from heat. 3. Brush fish with parsley and lemon mixture and season with salt and freshly ground black pepper. 4. Place under grill for 10 to 12 minutes, basting frequently until cooked. Serve with baked potatoes. Did you know? A glass of water and freshly squeezed lemon juice will help cleanse your skin, as the lemon contains enzymes that will rid your skin of dead cells.
ROAST PORK WITH APPLES (Serves 4)
n n n n n n n
4 pork chops 60ml (4T) sweet meat rub Pinch of salt 4 apples, quartered 125ml (½ cup) dried prunes 125ml (½ cup) white wine 30ml (2T) honey
METHOD: 1. Preheat oven to 180˚C. 2. Rub the pork chops with sweet meat
rub and season with salt. 2. Place pork, apples and prunes in a roasting pan. Pour over white wine and drizzle with honey. 3. Cover the roasting pan with foil and bake for 30 minutes. Remove foil and bake for 15 minutes to brown the pork slightly. Did you know? Apples have a high water concentration, which not only aids in rehydrating the body but helps with weight loss, too.
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E V E R Y D AY F O O D
SWEET CHILLI CHICKEN WITH ALMONDS (Serves 4)
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80ml (1/3 cup) coriander, finely chopped 2 chillies, seeded and finely chopped 1 garlic clove, crushed 15ml (1T) olive oil 700g chicken breast fillets, sliced into thin strips 30ml (2T) sunflower oil 80ml (1/3 cup) sweet chilli sauce 30ml (2T) lime juice 190ml (¾ cup) almonds, toasted 250ml (1 cup) snow peas
METHOD: 1. In a bowl, mix coriander, chillies, garlic and olive oil together. Rub chicken strips with mixture and marinate for 30 minutes. 2. In a saucepan or wok, heat sunflower oil and stir-fry chicken until brown and cooked through. 3. Add sweet chilli sauce, lime juice and stir-fry until sauce boils. Add almonds, snow peas and stir-fry until mixture has been heated through. 4. Serve with rice. DID YOU KNOW? Almonds are packed with Vitamin E which promotes healthy skin, hair and nails. Almonds also protect the body’s cell membranes from free radical damage caused by air pollution, peroxides and ultra-violet rays.
RED CABBAGE WITH AVOCADO AND ORANGES (Serves 4)
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1 red cabbage 2 ripe avocados 2 oranges 30ml (2T) olive oil Salt and freshly ground black pepper, to taste 10 mint leaves
METHOD: 1. Thinly slice the cabbage and place in a bowl. Cut avocados in half, remove stones and skin, and slice avocado into half-moons. Add to the cabbage. 2. With a sharp knife, remove the skin from the oranges. Slice oranges into pieces (do this step over the salad so the juice runs into it) and arrange into the salad. 3. Drizzle with olive oil and season with salt and pepper. Garnish with mint leaves and serve. DID YOU KNOW? Avocado is nature’s best moisturiser. Enriched with anti-ageing nutrients, add it to your diet and see the benefits as your skin starts looking younger, softer and more supple.
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E V E R Y D AY F O O D
CREAMY CUCUMBER AND SALMON SALAD (Serves 4)
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1 large cucumber 10ml (2 tsps) horseradish 10ml (2 tsps) wholegrain mustard 125ml (½ cup) sour cream 80ml (1/3 cup) fresh lemon juice 3ml (½ tsp) salt 2ml (¼ tsp) black pepper 450g smoked salmon, thinly sliced
METHOD: 1. Quarter the cucumber lengthwise, thickly slice it and place in a large bowl. 2. Mix horseradish, mustard, sour cream, lemon juice, salt, pepper and add to the cucumber. 3. Add salmon to cucumber, toss and serve over rocket leaves. DID YOU KNOW? Cucumber’s high water content helps to rejuvenate tired, dehydrated skin and it also contains the mineral silica, which contributes to healthy, glowing skin.
SUNFLOWER SEED SLICES
METHOD: 1. Line a 13cm x 9cm pan with foil and spray with non-stick cooking spray. 2. In a large bowl, stir together Rice Crispies, oats, raisins, seeds and peanuts. 3. In a medium saucepan, combine sugar, golden syrup and peanut butter. Cook for 3 to 5 minutes until mixture bubbles. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla essence. Pour mixture over Rice Crispies mixture and stir to combine. 4. Press the mixture into the prepared pan, allow it to cool down and cut into medium-size bars. DID YOU KNOW? Sunflower seeds contain acids that will help your skin secrete its natural oils and in turn help to prevent wrinkles and improve skin elasticity. A handful of seeds a day should do the trick. ■
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PROPS @home (Fourways)
(Makes 12 bars) ■ 500ml (2 cups) Rice Crispies ■ 500ml (2 cups) rolled oats ■ 125ml (½ cup) raisins ■ 125ml (½ cup) roasted sunflower seeds ■ 125ml (½ cup) pumpkin seeds ■ 125ml (½ cup) peanuts ■ 125ml (½ cup) brown sugar ■ 125ml (½ cup) golden syrup ■ 125ml (½ cup) peanut butter ■ 5ml (1 tsp) vanilla essence
STEP BY STEP
ROASTED
LEG OF LAMB Not only does Tumelo Sebopa show you how to roast a succulent leg of lamb, but she teaches you the art of deboning the meat, too. TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
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STEP BY STEP
YOU WILL NEED:
(Serves 6-8) ■ 1 leg of lamb ■ 2 red chillies, seeded and finely chopped ■ 2 cloves garlic, crushed ■ Handful of fresh sage leaves, chopped ■ 5ml (1 tsp) sage, dried ■ Handful of thyme sprigs, chopped ■ Handful of rosemary sprigs, chopped ■ 45ml (3T) butter ■ 15ml (1T) olive oil ■ Salt and black pepper to season
Gently release each end of the leg bone from the meat. Cut and scrape to clean the bone, easing it out as you work. Twist the bone and pull it out. With a small, sharp knife scrape the tendons off the meat. Using the knife, flatten and open the cavities on the left and right side to spread the meat out.
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Preheat oven to 180˚C. Mix chilli, garlic, sage, thyme, rosemary and butter together. Add olive oil and mix to form a paste. Rub the meat with mixture on all sides. Season with salt and black pepper, roll the meat and tie with a string.
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Trim all excess fat from the meat. Loosen the joint with your hand and tear the skin off to get a better grip. Place the meat on a carving board and with the knife outline the edges of the bone that are exposed. Cut deeper around the pelvic joint and cut through the tendons connected to the leg bone.
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Grasp the shank bone at the tip of the leg and cut the tendons at the base of the bone. Cut the meat away from the bone, keeping the meat on the other side in one piece. When the bone is clean, locate the knee joint, cut the tendons and remove the shank bone.
PHOTOGRAPHY Renelle Rampersad PROPS @home (Sandton)
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Place the meat in a roasting tin and roast for 45 minutes or until cooked through and succulent. Serve the lamb with roasted potatoes, carrots and marrows.
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FOOD NEWS
SIMPLY JELLICIOUS! All-time family favourite Moirs has launched an exciting range of Exotic Jellies and Instant Puddings. The luscious flavours for jellies are Mulberry, Grapefruit, Melon and Pomegranate. For the pudding you are spoilt for choice with Milk Tart, Apple Crumble, Peppermint Crisp Tart and Blueberry Cheesecake. A sweet end to any family meal, these easy-to-make JAMESON GOES FOR GOLD! desserts are available at leading supermarkets Jameson 18-year-old Limited Reserve Irish and convenience stores at R3,50 for the jellies and Whiskey has been awarded double gold at the R4,69 for the puddings.
UNLEASH YOUR WILD SIDE orn in the Western Cape Winelands, Wild Africa Cream liqueur is a smoothtextured blend of caramel, fresh cream and pure spirit. And now, Wild Africa Cream has extended their range to miniature Wild Africa Cream bottles. It’s so cute that you won’t be able to resist it. The sexy animal print, regularsized bottle and now the miniatures make for the perfect drink at a “Proudly South African” themed party, or to be given as a gift.
2009 San Francisco World Spirit Competition. In addition to this, Jameson Rarest Vintage Reserve and Jameson 12-year-old Special Reserve were each awarded gold medals.
HEALTH IS BEEG IN MEH-KEE-KOH
THE ULTIMATE GERM BUSTER
Household germs multiply in their millions if left unattended. But now, thanks to New Domestos 24-hour liquid gel, you can protect your family and your kitchen from nasty germs. This liquid gel is the perfect hygienic solution for surfaces used to prepare food, as well as for removing stains and disinfecting everyday household utensils such as chopping boards, often a hotbed of germ activity. Get Domestos 24-hour liquid gel now at leading retailers and supermarkets.
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WORDS Tumelo Sebopa
Mexican food just got healthier, with Old El Paso introducing wholegrain tortillas, which contain 40 percent wholegrain and twice the amount of fibre than regular tortillas. Just reheat them in the microwave and fill up with a salsa sauce. Old El Paso Tortillas are available at leading supermarkets and retail for R46,99 a pack.
TRADITIONAL FOOD COMPETITION
THE BEST OF BEANS What would winter be without a hearty bean soup? Tumelo Sebopa saves you the hardship of finding out.
eipati Mohapi hails from Pretoria and sent TRUE LOVE this month’s winning recipe. She loves making this bean soup, as it reminds her of her grandmother who still cooks it for the family. “Even my gran’s neighbours in Bloemfontein enjoy this soup because they are the first ones at the door whenever she cooks it.” If you’re hibernating through the last bit of winter, then this is the perfect palate warmer.
(Serves 6) ■ 250ml (1 cup) red speckled sugar beans ■ 250ml (1 cup) split peas ■ 30ml (2T) oil ■ 1 onion, chopped ■ 3 potatoes, diced ■ 5ml (1 tsp) pepper ■ 1 beef stock cube ■ 3ml (½ tsp) turmeric ■ 250ml (1 cup) cream
METHOD:
1. Rinse the beans under running water until the water runs clear. In a saucepan, place beans and add 3 cups of cold water. Bring to the boil and cook for 5 minutes. Remove from heat and soak for 1 hour. 2. Drain water, cover beans with boiling water and cook for further 45 to 60 minutes or until the beans are soft. 3. Rinse the split peas under running water until the water runs clear. In another saucepan, place split peas, cover with water and bring to the boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 30 minutes or until peas are soft. 4. In a large saucepan, heat the oil and fry onions until translucent. Add beans, split peas and remaining ingredients, except the cream. Simmer until potatoes are soft and cooked through. 5. Stir in cream, heat through and serve hot. ■
Seipati Mohapi wins a Boardmans voucher to the value of R4 000 and a complimentary copy of Anna Trapido's cookbook, Hunger For Freedom: The Story Of Food In The Life Of Nelson Mandela. Mandela Boardmans is South Africa’s original home store and aims to provide the most complete home-living solution. Boardmans’ merchandise assortment consists of well-priced core items, the best of international brands and the latest in fashion and technology. The Boardmans Gift Registry is also proving to be a very handy tool and can be used either electronically or in-store. It not only caters for wedding gifts but for all other special occasions. Experience the convenience of Boardmans online shopping at www.boardmans.co.za.
PHOTOGRAPHY Renelle Rampersad PROPS African Origin (Sandton City)
BEAN SOUP
CHEF OF THE MONTH
ROOTED TO THE KITCHEN Tumelo Sebopa meets head chef Allistair Lawrence whose motto is ‘think food, love food and live food’. llistair Lawrence always loved food, which just naturally grew into his passion – cooking for a living. “It was a tossup between becoming a lawyer or a chef, and because I didn’t take a gap year after school, studying for another seven years was not an option,” he explains. He then enrolled to study at the Institution of Culinary Arts in Stellenbosch. His first job was at the Village Hotel on the Spier Wine Estate, which was followed by a stint at the luxurious Grace Hotel in Cape Town. In 2004, Allistair packed up his cooking utensils and headed for Johannesburg where he landed a job at Roots restaurant at the Forum Homini boutique hotel situated in the The Cradle of Humankind. Today he is the head chef at this five-star eatery. Constantly plying his trade at Roots, his manager, master chef Philippe Wagenfuhrer, describes him as “a machine”. Allistair has won a number of competitions, with his first victory in 2006 at the Hans Bueschken Junior
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Chefs Challenge in New Zealand and more recently, in 2008, he participated at the World Association of Chefs Societies as a member of the National Culinary Team. Allistair draws his inspiration from local and international chefs, including Rudi Liebenberg, Bertus Basson, Craig Cormack and Gordon Ramsay. And with his motto, “think food, love food and live food” as his rudder, he is literally rooted to the kitchen and loving every minute of it!
THE RESTAURANT
Hidden between the Highveld grasses at Forum Homini, Roots is a fine dining restaurant that is headed by Wagenfuhrer. The restaurant serves a six-course dinner, a four-course lunch and a fourcourse breakfast, with its most popular times being Saturday brunch and Sunday lunch. All foods are served with wine teasers from the Roots cellar that boasts handpicked wines from top South African wine estates. Roots have won numerous awards, including Top 10 Restaurant in South Africa 2008/09; Top 10 Fine Dining Restaurant of the Year 2008; a Platinum Award from American Express 2007/08,
Le Blazon de la Chaine des Rotisseurs, and a Platinum tourism grading.
WHAT’S HOT IN HIS KITCHEN
Allistair loves to cook with good quality, fresh local produce and he says Roots’ speciality is that their food has subtle African, French and Asian influences. For starters, Allistair recommends the foie gras on toasted brioche with apple chutney. The main course is a festive trio of slow-cooked offal on vegetables, stuffed chicken breasts, and slow-cooked venison served in pastry cases. And, lest we forget those with an incurable sweet tooth, he recommends the old-time favourite, malva pudding, for dessert.
THE WINES
The perfect accompaniment to the starter is the Rudera Robusto Chenin Blanc, followed by the Rudera Cabernet Sauvignon, with its opaque purple rim and intense ruby hue, to complement the red meat main course. Sweet and full with a lovely texture, the Rudera Noble Late Harvest gets a thumbs-up from Allistair, and he serves it with the dessert. For more information and to make reservations, call 011 668 7000.
PHOTOGRAPHY Vanessa Lewis
THE CHEF
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Humble ABODE Kemong Mopedi discovers that local singing sensation Siphokazi has a home that reflects her relaxed spirit and music. Photography by Neil Kirby.
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A room with a view... Beautiful candles and a comfortable black couch create the perfect ambience in the living room of Siphokaziâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Midrand townhouse.
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Siphokazi’s home, with its distinct orange and brown decor, is the perfect place for her to kick off her shoes, unwind and listen to her favourite gospel artists.
elebville is a place often associated with wild partying and out-of-this-world fashion and matching personalities. Celebrated Afro-jazz and soul musician Siphokazi Maraqana is as much a part of that world, except that she doesn’t behave like a diva (even though she has every right to) and prefers to spend her spare time in her two-bedroom townhouse in Midrand. Despite her first album surpassing the whopping 100 000 sales mark, this 31-year-old is amongst the few truly humble musical talents this country has seen to date. Her character, she says, is all part of a bigger plan. “I want children from rural areas to see that celebrity life is not all about being a total
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extrovert and that you can be as reserved as I am and still make it.” The media tried changing her into a larger-than-life character by labelling her as “boring” and saying her stage outfits didn’t do any justice to her lanky frame, but to this day Siphokazi remains the same girl she was back in her home town of Lusikisiki in the Eastern Cape. When we arrive she wastes no time displaying her warm personality, leading us to a laid-out table on the balcony where there’s enough food to feed half of Gauteng. “I was actually expecting more people,” she says. Her townhouse is an extension of her personality… very simple with many family pictures and her accolades – two SAMAs and one Metro FM award – on display. Anyone who’s heard or seen a
Siphokazi radio or TV interview, knows that she never fails to make mention of her grandmother. And as is expected, there’s a framed pictured of her and gogo (grandmother) on the pedestal next to the TV set. Her small kitchen, with it’s cream cupboards, appliances and flowers lined up on the counter, is where you’re likely to find her experimenting with different foods when she’s not entertaining adoring fans on stage. “I’m no gourmet chef, but everything I know about good food I’ve taught myself,” she beams. “I’m not a fan of take-aways so no matter how tired I am, I’d rather steam something quickly,” she says. Siphokazi criss-crosses the country on her music tours, leaving her very little time to enjoy her humble abode.
Siphokazi’s aim was to create a welcoming atmosphere and she achieves this with displays of family photos, earthy decor and a welcoming tea tray for guests.
But when she is at home, she’s usually sprawled on her comfy black couch, decorated with an orange throw and matching cushions, while watching her favourite gospel DVDs. She admits to loving earthy colours, which is quite obvious from the bursts of orange and splashes of brown in the living room. All these colours add to the warmth of the setting, but she confesses that the colour co-ordination was not planned. The shelf-like glass table in the centre of the living room, which serves as a book and snack stand, is one of her favourite features in the room.
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‘I always vow to bring back items with colours that I don’t have HERE, but the same colours keep making a comeback into my home and my wardrobe.’ “I love shopping, so when I’m out there I always vow to bring back items with colours that I don’t have here, but the same colours keep making a comeback into my home and my wardrobe,” she giggles. “I enjoy a practical and clean home and believe that clean spaces make way for inner peace,” which she says is important for someone like herself who usually spends so much time in recording studios and on stage. After her fair share of hopping around
some of Jo’burg’s “notorious” suburbs (Hillbrow, Berea and Yeoville) she admits that Midrand is the most peaceful place she’s lived thus far. “The green landscape that stretches out in front of me when I stand on my balcony always deceives me into thinking that I still live in the serenity of Lusikisiki but since this is Jo’burg, there’ll probably be new developments in no time,” she laments. After expressing her concern about urbanisation, saying that it takes away so many childhood memories and invites crime, she starts talking about her wishes. “My ultimate dream is to own a home that is big enough to house my family members because I enjoy having them over.” But for now she’s decided to focus on promoting her second album, Ndinovuyo, and hopefully rake in the big bucks to realise her dreams of owning more property. The album, released through Native Rhythms at the end of October last year, is aimed at celebrating the support she received from her debut album. “More importantly, I wanted to thank the media, who tried to shake me up on many occasions but failed and my fans for finally accepting me as I am.”
STYLIST Taryne Jakobi
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T R AV E L
HAVEN OF PEACE Thomas Maneno swoops into Tanzania to sample Dar es Salaamâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s rich history and vibrant modernity.
The view across Dar es Salaam city, with the harbour and Lutheran Church in the background.
Fishing or operating water taxis are the main sources of income for many of the inhabitants of Dar.
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t
he midnight air of Dar es Salaam was welcoming. I had departed from Nairobi on a chilly night aboard a Precision Air flight, eager to find relief from the extreme cold that had gripped the city for more than two months, and a chance to shed the warm leather jacket that had become my second skin. The building at Julius Nyerere International Airport is small. Photographer Elvis Ogina and I seemed to have walked straight into customs from the aircraft. The airport wasn’t busy, although it was a Friday, so we were quickly ushered into the United Republic of Tanzania. In no time we were out of the terminal building, where we found a platoon of taxi operators waiting. A short, stout man approached us and asked in the unique Tanzanian Swahili, if he could drive us into town. “Karibu Tanzania, (Welcome to Tanzania),” he said. “Nina gari naomba niwapeleke mnapokwenda (I have a car. Allow me to drive you to your destination),” he offered. Before he could tell us his charge, a younger man disengaged himself from the crowd of taxi drivers, all dressed in white shirts, and asked the man before us if he was next in line to collect a fare. Politely, the first man withdrew and left us with the new taxi driver. He charged 20 000 Tanzanian shillings (about R130) to take us to our hotel in the lively and colourful Kariakoo area in downtown Dar es Salaam, or Dar, as the locals call it.
Women shop for fresh produce on the streets of the city.
WELCOME TO DAR! Driving through the cool evening air on a smooth, wide road, I asked if I could smoke. “By all means, please do,” he answered. “There’s no problem, brother.” Smoking is allowed in public places in Tanzania, unlike in Kenya where new laws prohibit it. However, few people seem to take advantage of the freedom to smoke on the streets of Dar. This is a city that is rich in history. The sultans of Oman called it the Abode of Peace (although it’s commonly mistranslated from the Swahili as “haven of peace”), to which they fled after a series of wars at home. The sultans turned what was a small fishing village into a safe port and trading centre in the mid-19th century.
They occupied both the city and Zanzibar, which Sultan Seyyid Majid made the capital of his Omani Empire in 1866, 18 years before the Berlin Conference and Treaty that gave control of Tanganyika to Germany in what became known as the “Scramble for Africa”. The Dar of today is a large city with a population of 1,5 million people, where Arab dhows (boats) dock among modern speedboats and huge sea-going vessels in a modern harbour. As modern as it is, though, finding a good place to stay in Dar can be daunting at times because the tourism infrastructure is not well developed and there aren’t that many hotels in the city. The government has acknowledged that this is a problem and is encouraging investors to develop facilities to accommodate tourists, which has even led to some residential houses in the suburbs being converted into guesthouses offering good, affordable accommodation. Staying in the suburbs also makes it convenient for visitors who want to see how the locals live, rather than spending their time and money in “tourist traps”. On Fridays, one of the most exciting places to be in Dar is Sinza, a suburb that is home to a mixture of people – businessmen, corporate executives and top- to mid-level government employees. I’d been told this was a good place to experience authentic Tanzanian social life. Sinza is usually very busy during weekends when a lot of Kilimanjaro and Safari lager is enjoyed here. And Tusker, too, although it comes in long-necked 500ml bottles in this part of East Africa. Live bands play Congolese and Kiswahili music in open-air bars, with the nearby discos frequented by younger and more energetic crowds. The outdoors, with its live music and cool air, however, seems to be the preference of many locals. On weekends, the Relini suburb, with plenty of good food and drinks, is popular among Tanzania’s middle-class professionals and businesspeople. Like Sinza, live bands play in its many restaurants and bars. At one restaurant, the New Savoy, I saw men and women leap to their feet when the resident Congolese band struck up a popular number. Kariakoo, host to a number of mid-level hotels, is also a place of variety. It is home to the colourful Kariakoo Market, the busiest of Dar’s informal business centres that attract hundreds of local and foreign visitors. Many
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T R AV E L
A CITY ON THE RISE Dar is a city bent on renewal; a renaissance that seems to have begun with the adoption of more liberal economic policies that have drawn foreigners into the country. Old buildings are making way for skyscrapers in the city centre, and suburbs are developing fast, as new money flows into the economy. This is most evident on a Sunday when one can take a leisurely walk through town to see the majestic, towering buildings that are drawing a brand new skyline for the city. A ride on a dala dala (the Tanzanian version of the minibus) offers a chance to mingle with ordinary Tanzanians and save on cab fare. But they are often crowded and carry more standing than sitting passengers. To get to the exclusive South Beach, people take one of two public ferries. This part of the city is Dar’s hottest new attraction for local and foreign tourists with clean, open beaches and new developments. On a weekend, the ferries are not too crowded, but people hurry to get the best positions
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and views. The ferries stop at midnight and resume early in the morning, but a longer route, 20km by land, will also get you to and from South Beach. The resort charges an entry fee of 2 000 Tanzanian shillings (about R13), for which you are guaranteed entertainment and a secure beach. At South Beach, bajajis, tricycle taxis known in Kenya as the tuktuks, ferry passengers around. Children can play in a pool in the middle of the resort, while adults can enjoy drinks at a nearby makuti (thatch) stool bar, called the Whisky Shark. More makuti sheds with low wooden benches stand at the opposite end. The charge of 3 000 Tanzanian shillings (about R20) for half a litre of beer is an indication that the resort aims to attract top tourist clientele. Occasionally, livestock are herded along the beach to pastures behind the resort, but rather than annoy visitors, this seems to arouse their curiosity. The small island of Kibugumo is visible in the distance from South Beach. It offers an even more exclusive resort away from the hustle and bustle of the city, but to reach it one requires private transport or a chartered boat. South Beach is in many ways a romantic and peaceful place, perfect to bring the family. Relaxing in the sunshine with a drink in hand is a great way to experience this haven of peace. Our visit ended on a Friday afternoon when we boarded a flight for Musoma in northwestern Tanzania, for yet another assignment. At the airport lounge at Julius Nyerere Airport we fondly remembered Dar as a warm city with many friendly people. A place where people genuinely care about and respect each other. Flying over Dar
with its coastline beautiful and alluring, its old houses bearing many wonderful stories waiting to be told, its delicious food waiting to be tasted, we realised it is a city that is often overlooked by tourists. It was sad to leave the place where the hassles of life do not seem to dampen people’s spirits. ■
STAYING IN DAR ES SALAAM TOP OF THE RANGE Kilimanjaro Kempinski Hotel: $250 (about R2 125) for a double room with breakfast. Call +255 (0)22 2131111; email reservations.kilimanjaro@kempinski.com; visit www.kempinski.com. Southern Sun: $170 (about R1 445) per room (double or single) bed and breakfast. Call +255 (0)22 2137575; email adamf@southernsun.co.tz, visit www.southernsun.com. MIDDLE OF THE RANGE South Beach Resort: Offers doubles with breakfast for $100 (about R850). Call +255 (0)22 2820666/67/68; email info@southbeachresort-tz.com; visit www.southbeachresort-tz.com. BUDGET BUYS Aroche Grand Hotel: Offers doubles with breakfast for $40 (about R340). Call +255 (0)22 2183914/17/18; email info@arochegrandhotels.com; visit www.arochegrandhotels.com.
PHOTOGRAPHY Elvis Ogina; Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
locals go there to do business – buying wares for resale upcountry or bringing in new supplies. There is never a dull moment in the crowded streets around the market, where loud music blares from huge speakers mounted outside shops and restaurants. It is also a place of historical relevance. This is where African carrier corps who served in the British colonial army during World War II were quartered. The name is derived from the words carrier corps, which in local lingua became Kariakoo. Its many restaurants cater for various culinary tastes with Changu, a tasty fish served with rice or chapatti, being a very popular choice among visitors and locals.
DRIVE BY ANET SCHOEMAN
THE CHERY ON TOP
CHERY QQ3 AUTO
AUDI A6
his car will make you renew acquaintances with friends and family in remote corners of Mzansi just so you can pack the car and hit the road. The updated model boasts visual and technical improvements that will have you begging for more. The trump card is that this vehicle still uses 15 percent less fuel than the previous model. WHY BUY IT? You will be spoilt for choice. Pick you favourite from four petrol and turbo-diesel engines, and front wheel or Quattro all-wheel drive. And the pièce de résistance is the optional Xenon Plus headlights with daytime running lights consisting of a horizontal strip of bright white LED’s, which were designed for enhanced visibility in everyday traffic, but became the envy of every other driver on the road and the elusive holy grail for the competition. Be prepared to fork out between R372 500 and R670 000 for this honour.
LOCAL LOOKER
FORD FOCUS
The Ford Focus has been manufactured in South Africa since 2004, so you’re assured of buying proudly South African when you speed off in this one. This medium-sized car is the first and only model to date to win the “Car of the Year” titles in both Europe and North America, illustrating the level of ability and appeal of the vehicle. WHY BUY IT? This has always been a great-looking car and with the fresh exterior, upgraded interior and impressive new features, you will not be disappointed. Ford also debuts their innovative six-speed PowerShift automatic transmission in this model. And to make sure that you stay safe they have added Electronic Stability Program (ESP) with Traction Control (TC) with the PowerShift system. Safety has also been upgraded with an automatic hazard warning light activation system after emergency braking. This looker is available in a sedan and hatchback and prices range between R185 950 and R308 650.
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PHOTOGRAPHS www.quickpic.co.za
t
SLEEK AND OH SO SEXY!
With rising vehicle prices, consumers are hunting for more affordable options. The Chery QQ3 is a compact vehicle from the Chinese stable that was launched in May 2008. Now it’s also available as an automatic model with the option of using it as a manual gearbox at the push of a button. WHY BUY IT? It is always difficult for the new kid on the block to make a good first impression. When the car was launched there were initial questions about quality and whether it would be able to survive our tough road conditions. Only time will tell if the QQ3 has staying power. But what you do get is a cute, compact car with an automatic gearbox that should be great for inner city traffic. This 800cc engine with 38kW will set you back R83 900, which probably makes it the cheapest automatic model available.
MUSIC BY KEMONG MOPEDI
THE SOUL OF IRELAND he’s 21, from Dublin and brings with her a soulful sound that is sure to revolutionise the music industry for decades to come. Laura Izibor has been labelled as an R&B artist but quite frankly, her unique sound is bigger than rhythm and blues. In fact, she’s more of a cross between Corinne Bailey Rae and Jill Scott with a bit of pop thrown into the mix. It was inevitable that her debut album, Let The Truth Be Told, would be pleasant to the ear since it took four years to put together. At the age of 13, she discovered the music of Marvin Gaye and later Otis Redding, and that was the birth of her relationship with soul music. In an interview on virgin.com, Laura explains that she didn’t go into the studio with the intention of co-producing her album because that would’ve harmed the product. This is how she says it happened: “I was writing all the songs and then going in and working with these people and having a bit of attitude. I was like ‘how would the strings sound if they came in there; how about if the beat came in the second verse, actually no, I don’t think we need any beat, just strings and piano.’ So the producer I was working with said he thought I should co-produce it with him.”
SELAELO SELOTA LAPENG LAKA (SONY MUSIC) There are only a few artists who get the pure sound of African music right and Selota is at the top of that list. His latest album, released earlier this year, has had fans begging their favourite radio stations to play more and more of the album. He also produced Judith Sephuma’s Change Is Here as well as some of her earlier albums; once again proving that he can double-up as an impressive producer and an even better musician. Listen out for the tracks Lapeng Laka, the very familiar Tshipi and Otshwana Le. TRUE RATINGS:
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KERI HILSON IN A PERFECT WORLD (UNIVERSAL) If you’re an old soul who prefers your R&B untampered with, then you might just dismiss this album as too crunky and clublike after listening to the first four tracks. But before you do, listen to the love song Knock You Down, which features Ne-Yo. That track on its own is enough to convince you that Hilson is not only a chorus specialist, as we may have thought when she kept featuring on other people’s albums. Her Amerie-like singing style dominates most of the album but her tone becomes softer on tracks like Energy and Make Love. TRULY EXCEPTIONAL
ANTHONY HAMILTON THE POINT OF IT ALL (SONY MUSIC) The king of soulful lyrics is back with his sixth album. Choosing a favourite song on this album is a tad difficult because every track is so unique. For instance, the country music-inspired Prayin’ For You/Superwoman sounds nothing like Cool, where he sings over a beat that could work well in hip hop. Hamilton sings with the sincerity of someone who has experienced all that love has to offer. I Did It For Sho and The Point Of It All are some of the tracks that make an impression. EXCELLENT
VERY GOOD
PUTUMAYO MUSIC ITALIA (PUTUMAYO WORLD MUSIC) This compilation of some of the jazzy tunes that Italy has on offer is a reflection of the serenity of this country and its people. Some popular Italian artists featured here are Bandabardò, Alessandro Pitoni, Giorgio Conte and eight others. Many of the songs have a classic feel; a conscious effort by many contemporary Italian artists to pay homage to the popular Italian classical music of the 1950s. Part of Putumayo’s mission is to “introduce people to uplifting music” from other countries; this album will definitely force you to explore a different culture. NOTHING SPECIAL
BOOKS BY MELINDA FERGUSON
GREAT READS
THE BOOK THAT CHANGED MY LIFE
BAKING CAKES IN KIGALI
Among many other talents, Napo Masheane is an accomplished playwright and poet.
BY GAILE PARKIN (ATLANTIC BOOKS, R194) This is a unique and charming book, which is perfect to pick up in celebration of women’s month. Funny, moving and meaningful, the book tells the story of Angel, who moves to Rwanda from Tanzania with her family where she finds time to pursue her passion for baking beautifully designed cakes. Angel is all too aware of the horrors that people have experienced in Rwanda and she makes sure people still find a space for joy and celebration. A wonderful read!
Bookstores stand as communal places for masterminds, so I wouldn’t just pass a place that has that kind of knowledge. When I walk in I don’t only see bookshelves with words but I also hear voices. I hear most clearly the voices of people who seem to awaken something in me. Voices like Anna Deavere Smith in Letters To A Young Artist, for example. I proceed to be touched by Kahlil Gibran (The Prophet); I am bathed in the light of Robin S. Sharma (The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari) and then find myself, my mother and my sister between the pages of Grace Nichols’ poems (The Fat Black Woman’s Poems). These are books that hold me when I can’t find words to speak. They push me to my limits and keep telling me that I can do more and that I am more.
LOVE IN THE TIME OF TREASON
BY ZUBEIDA JAFFER (KWELA BOOKS, R148) Part of the Homebru series, this book is about the activist Ayesha Dawood who was also an accused in the 1956 Treason Trial, along with Nelson Mandela. Set in India and South Africa, this is a moving love story against the backdrop of South Africa’s turbulent times during apartheid. Author Zubeida Jaffer is an accomplished writer who lends great authenticity to this story.
AN ELEGY FOR EASTERLY
DISGRACED BY SAIRA AHMED (HEADLINE REVIEW, R151) This is the shocking true story of a young Muslim woman, Saira, who comes from a violent, repressive household. When her innocent relationship with a young man is discovered she is sent from England to Pakistan where she is forced to marry an older man who repeatedly rapes her. She manages to escape back to England but destitute, she must return to her family home where her troubles
really begin.
BOOK OF THE MONTH BEAUTY’S GIFT
BY SINDIWE MAGONA (KWELA BOOKS, R148)
This is probably one of the most important books to come out of the local publishing industry in years. It’s about unfaithful men infecting their women with HIV. Magona is a brave and fearless voice in an all too silent terrain of denial. She is at her best in this book – powerful, decisive and searing. In essence the book is about four women who decide to change their fate and those who are living around them. An absolute must-read from Homebru. *ALL BOOKS ARE AVAILABLE AT EXCLUSIVE BOOKS COUNTRYWIDE.
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TRUE LOVE AUGUST 2009
PHOTOGRAPH True Love Library
BY PETINA GAPPAH (FABER, R199) Being given the thumbs-up by one of our most famous literary giants, J.M. Coetzee, is no mean feat, but Petina Gappah has managed to get an endorsement on her cover with Coetzee calling her “a rising star of Zimbabwean literature”. This is a wonderful collection of short stories, filled with great humour and insight into a world seldom seen in literature but one that we will hopefully hear more about. You won’t be disappointed in this African sister’s writings.
IT’S THE LITTLE THINGS THAT COUNT Because ALPO understands your pets’ needs, you can now show them how much you care by following these valuable tips.
EXERCISE WITH THEM ■
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You both need it! However, lack of activity is a fact of modern life for humans and canines alike. Exercise leads to longer life, increased strength, endurance, flexibility and the ability to better deal with modern times. Try branching out from walks and play with a ball or frisbee. Begin with short periods of activity (although never immediately before or after meal times) at slow speeds, and gradually increase the time, speed and distance. Keeping your dog on a leash will give you more control while walking or running. If your dog has a history of medical problems, it’s better to consult your vet to plan an appropriate exercise programme. Whatever activity you end up doing together, always remember that your dog loves to spend time with you, so make that time really special.
KEEP THEM HEALTHY Once a month, check your dog for early signs of illness because, as you know, prevention is better than cure. Check your dog’s:
COPYWRITER Hayden Horner PHOTOGRAPH Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
Taking time out from your busy lifestyle once in a while just to show those close to you that you care could add years to both your lives. If you would like to stand a chance to win this prize, SMS “ALPO True Love” to 31022 and your number will be entered into the draw for the prize. Standard SMS rates apply. Free SMSs do not apply. The closing date is 31 August 2009. The winner will be drawn on 18 September 2009. The judges’ decision is final and no correspondence will be entered into. The winner will be notified telephonically by ALPO within 30 days of the closing date. For more information, visit www.purina.co.za, or call 0860 (PURINA) 787 462.
WIN a dog bed nths’ and six mo LPO supply of A Full Course!
Body for signs of weight loss or gain. Ears for signs of thick brown or green wax, and odour. Eyes for runniness, redness or soreness. Nose for crusting on the surface, runny discharges or bleeding. Breath – bad breath indicates digestive problems or bad teeth. Teeth for excess tartar. The gums should be pink or black, not red or swollen. ■ Coat for broken hairs. ■ Nails – they must be white or black, and smooth. ■ Stools for mucus, and watch out for diarrhoea or constipation. ■ Head and tail – if they are down, your dog is feeling under the weather. Remember to consult your veterinarian if you are in doubt about your dog’s health and well-being. ■ ■ ■ ■ ■ ■
FEEDING ALPO ALPO has been formulated by leading dog nutritionists to give your dog all the essential nutrients, minerals and vitamins in balanced proportions to ensure a long, happy and healthy life.
DID YOU KNOW? All dogs are identical in anatomy: 321 bones and 42 permanent teeth.
Q&A
Q: What can I do to keep my dog’s teeth healthy? A: Regular brushing, at least three to four times a week,
is your best defence. You can also feed your dog ALPO with Dental Daily for a lifetime of good dental health. Each nutritious pellet is enriched with calcium and magnesium to keep teeth strong on the inside; and the crunchy texture of the pellets will keep them clean and white on the outside.
WAT C H BY MELINDA FERGUSON AND MAPULA NKOSI
YOUR DVD DATE WILD CHILD
lthough this is a feel-good family movie starring Eddie Murphy, it seems as if many people have soured towards the actor after he showed himself as a bad “baby daddy” when former Spice Girl, Mel B, gave birth to their daughter. Redeeming himself somewhat, Murphy plays the role of a successful financial executive who spends more time messaging on his BlackBerry than with his cute seven-year-old daughter. When he hits a crisis, the movie explores the heart-warming way he finds the solution to his problems in his daughter’s imaginary world. RELEASE DATE: 28 AUGUST • DISTRIBUTOR: UIP
IZULU LAMI
A wonder ful new local movie that is perfect for the whole family, iZulu Lami (My Secret Sky), has already received accolades by winning the Best Feature Film award at the Pan African Film Festival held in Cannes this year. It’s about two orphans who leave their rural village for the big city. They take along a mat, which their mother made before she died, hoping to enter it into a competition that their mother dreamed of entering. On their travels they have many adventures, including meeting a street gang and a sleazy pimp. This movie is a must-see! RELEASE DATE: 21 AUGUST DISTRIBUTOR: STER KINEKOR
MY SISTER’S KEEPER
Based on best-selling author Jodi Picoult’s book that goes by the same name, the movie features a sterling cast including Cameron Diaz and Alec Baldwin, with Nick Cassavetes in the director’s chair. It’s a fascinating story about a girl, Anna, who was conceived as a “harvest child” and genetically engineered through in-vitro fertilisation so she would be a match for her older sister, Kate, who is suffering from acute leukaemia. An original and spellbinding film, it is packed with moral issues and plenty of drama. RELEASE DATE: 7 AUGUST • DISTRIBUTOR: NU METRO
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THE POWERPUFF GIRLS
(CARTOON NETWORK) A Cartoon Network favourite, The Powerpuff Girls follows the adventures of Blossom, Bubbles and Buttercup. Based in the fictional city of Townsville, a typical episode entails humorous, if not somewhat graphic variations of villain- and monster-bashing (for which the show has been criticised). But the girls also deal with everyday issues that young children face, including bedwetting. True to the minimalistic visual look, The Powerpuff Girls, with its off-beat humour and violent fi ght scenes, might be best suited to teen and adult viewers.
DEXTER’S LABORATORY
(CARTOON NETWORK) The complete season of the boy genius, Dexter, who has an IQ that enables him to build the longest roller coaster or a spaceship from his bedroom. Dexter’s parents are oblivious to his scientific exploits and he has to contend with an annoying younger sister, who is often the sole beneficiary of his inventions. When I sat down to watch this with my cartoon-addict son, I did not last the full four hours on offer. This one definitely needs parents to ration their kids’ viewing.
STAGE FLASH!
Don’t miss the beautiful ballet Giselle, brought to you by The South African Ballet Theatre. This timeless ballet will be at the Johannesburg Civic Theatre from 28 August to 20 September. Giselle is the ultimate ballet romance about a prince who falls in love with a peasant girl, and her love for him, which is stronger than betrayal and death.
PHOTOGRAPHS Gallo Images/Wire Images
IMAGINE THAT
(NU METRO) This teen flick doesn’t claim any original kudos but it is a pleasant view with Poppy Moore (Emma Roberts) getting up to harmless pranks when she is sent to an English fi nishing school. Of course, Poppy experiences the ultimate American girl fantasy – falling in love with a handsome Brit. And by the time she is due to be expelled from school, we want her to stay forever. Great family viewing that is safe for kids of all ages.
S TA R S BY LINDA SHAW
LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 5, 7, 14, 15, 23, 28
SCORPIO
23 October – 21 November Existing love affairs could need a dash of romance – before the 6th – to keep them breathing. No need to get all sulky. Nothing much has changed, except this time you’re the one calling the florist. Even so, keep your eyes forward until the 20th. A forbidden fascination could sneak in from the left, but don’t do it. This one is not for you. Instead focus on staying healthy, taking a break and keeping the stress down. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 6, 16, 26, 28, 32, 35
LEO WOMEN OF THE MONTH Whitney Houston (9 August 1963); Vicki Sampson (8 August 1965); Halle Berry (14 August 1968).
LEO
23 July – 22 August Looking for a soulmate? Look no further. The very person your soul desires will appear on your doorstep after the 6th. If not, you’ve already met the person. Oh, and don’t forget, the soulmate is usually the one you like least – at first. While you’re pondering that, do some work. An interesting new offer needs you alert and interested. And the Leo new Moon on the 20th brings unexpected delights, and that means money. Just for you. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 1, 23, 33, 34, 42, 45
VIRGO
23 August – 22 September The new Moon on the 20th brings enlightenment and unexpected magic. Before that, misbehave all you like. But do it with a smile. After all, what’s the point of indulging in wicked behaviour. Guilt is old news and fulfilling your desires is the new energy. Money’s good too, with an interesting job offer coming after the 6th. Not that you’re overly concerned with such things. The hormones are far too rampant for such boredom; next month perhaps. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 3, 6, 9, 19, 21, 23
LIBRA
23 September – 22 October So you’re back in overdrive and ready to take on the universe. Great stuff! But if you pace yourself you might manage to keep the blood pressure below boiling point. A clear plan of action will help keep you focussed, while a
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SAGITTARIUS
22 November – 21 December Got any unfulfilled fantasies? Write them down. Expect delivery after the 20th. That aside, love is after you. To escape you’ll have to hide in a ditch. If you have love, watch it grow. Money’s ambling in too – through work, friends, lovers and winnings. Accept whatever’s offered, knowing in your heart that it’s just the beginning. Home, meanwhile, is a madhouse. Tempers are flaring up, patience is down. Try to be the good guy. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 3, 8, 18, 21, 22, 44
CAPRICORN
22 December – 19 January As the heavens turn, so your life transforms into something completely new. No point arguing. Just because you’re uncomfortable with change doesn’t mean you get to sit on your butt and watch. For a start, there’s enough money to force you to act. And quickly, before someone else gets it. And love is in again, so go get some. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 9, 21, 32, 33, 44, 45
AQUARIUS 20 January – 18 February Your relationships are not what they could be. Best you separate for a while, and take stock. Enough with the blaming! Ask yourself what you can do to repair the damage, and then ask yourself how much you want it repaired. Don’t make any drastic decisions just yet though; certainly not before the 20th. Your perspectives are out of sync now and no good decision is ever made by the ego. If in doubt, ask for help. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 1, 2, 7, 19, 27, 33
PISCES
19 February – 20 March You’re looking good, actually better than good. And if there was ever a time to behave
like a brat, and get away with it, that time is now. So don’t you dare let anyone push you around this month. Money is coming in from the 6th. Love has added lust and adventure to its list of requirements. And fabulous good fortune becomes your new middle name after the 20th. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 3, 7, 15, 27, 29, 44
ARIES
21 March – 19 April You’ll have to be willing to admit that you’re occasionally wrong if you really want things to start going right. Promising changes are happening at work as long as you’re happy to eat a couple of kilos of humble pie. And if you’re hoping for some back-up, look to your love life. It’s the perfect time to fulfil an ancient dream and score a few points in the office at the same time. In short, ask for help, and stay honest. Can’t go wrong. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 5, 6, 11, 21, 22, 33
TAURUS
20 April – 20 May If you want to speculate on a somewhat dodgy market, feel free. One thing though, only invest what you’re happy to lose. Not that you necessarily will. It’s just that, even for you, the money market is unpredictable now. Besides, your body is weeping from endless stress. It needs some love, and a break. Try lighting three candles and inviting abundance, love and joy into your life. And then relax. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 6, 12, 15, 23, 29, 30
GEMINI
21 May – 20 June That creative brilliance is all aglow. This is the moment to trust yourself completely. It’s risk time – time to challenge the norms and go with your instincts. And if you can find your courage (remember, you may be laughed at) you’ll be amazed at the results. There’s career advancement on the cards; possible new job offers and a fascinating new turn in the love life. All that’s needed is for you to let go. LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 12, 16, 17, 34, 43, 48
CANCER
21 June – 22 July A swirl of social entertainment leaves you wondering what happened to your real life. Don’t you dare fret about that! It’ll wait for you as long as you need it to. Meantime, aren’t you having an absolute ball? If not, you need an instant attitude adjustment as you learn to see magic in the moment. Also, look out for the odd wicked flirtation. Not that anyone is judging you. It’s just that actions have consequences. Are you ready for yours? LUCKY LOTTO NUMBERS: 3, 5, 17, 22, 44, 49
ILLUSTRATION Elzanne de Klerk
genuine desire to co-operate with the team could keep you generous. Even so, watch out for dodgy contracts after the 20th. Read the fine print, and read it twice.
crossword
Scandinavian coin Pointing finger
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Bid Donkey
Snakelike fish
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Ocean
Money
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Greek letter
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Book of maps
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Undergarments
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Indian fig trees with branches that take root Insane
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2nd Grade
The whole amount
Moon walker, .... Armstrong
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Represents Conditional a kiss word
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Leg bone
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14th letter of alphabet
▼ Tellurium symbol
Side of body First person below waist singular and above thigh
▼ Young goat
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Disentangled
Means half
Long skirt
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Social insects
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Capital of Peru He's from Denmark
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Make table ready for meal
Delaware (abbr) Type of flower
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Glossy fabric
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2nd vowel
Moist A poet would write one
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Tie it to keep ribbon in place Destroy, ...away with
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▼ Ready for picking
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Each (abbr)
▼ true lovE august 2009
Muvhango actress (5,6)
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▼ South African yes
Noah's boat
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Pack them for a journey Tribal emblem
Come first
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Boy's name
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July ANSWER: Shovel AUGUST CLUE: The letters in the shaded squares will spell out an item of clothing.
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3rd musical note
Hearing organ
Dreaded
Introduces alternative
Pronoun
Frozen water Chose by vote
Negative reply
Be quiet!
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5th vowel
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Child's nurse
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Not commanded
Printing measure In front
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Possesses
Extreme fright
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Paid (abbr)
Former lover
Dad
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PHOTOGRAPHS True Love Library; Gallo Images/gettyimages.com
Paris is here
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Los Angeles in short
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Rand sign
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Toy bear
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Exclamation of pleasure Product of combustion
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Compass point
▼ Repair
Touched
Singer (7,7)
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Type of welding
Banquets
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Come face to face with
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Butterfly catcher
Requests
186
▼ Overweight
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Animal with long neck
Compiled by Denise Cook.
CELEBRITY CROSSWORD NO.23
TRUE LOVE’s celebrity crossword is packed with cryptic clues to help you guess the words to fill the spaces. The letters in the shaded squares also spell out a word each month. This month’s answers will appear in the September 2009 issue.
Hunger Stalks Sub-Saharan Africa ... Nine out of 10 countries with the highest levels of hunger are in Sub-Saharan Africa. Every year the number of food-insecure people here increases by 26 per cent! The warning lights are flashing: growing unrest, protests, wide spread violence as masses face possible starvation.
... And South Africa can make a difference Agriculture will do it. We have the expertise. We have the land. We can grow the food. What we need is for society, in partnership with newly assembled Government, to create an environment where sustainable agriculture can flourish. Vibrant agriculture counters hunger and poverty; can generate more jobs than any other industry and stabilises society. With 80 million additional mouths to feed world-wide annually, countries best equipped to weather the storms will be those with a sound agricultural infrastructure. Invest in South Africa â&#x20AC;Ś Invest in South African products â&#x20AC;Ś Invest in our agriculture!
Omnia Head Office: Omnia House, 13 Sloane Street, PO Box 69888, Bryanston, 2021 Tel: +2711 709-8778 Fax: +2711 463-3020 www.omnia.co.za B0134
soaps
GENERATIONS MONDAY TO FRIDAY ON
RHYTHM CITY
MONDAY TO FRIDAY ON ETV AT 6.30PM Sunay continues to exploit Tshidi and Thula. Two policemen visit Suffocate. Everyone is stunned when Tshidi is arrested. Gail pretends to have just arrived from America. Lu finds out she is pregnant with twins. David confronts a horrified Lu. Gail tells S’bu she and Smokey are still involved. After collapsing, Lu has to make a tough decision about the life of her unborn babies. Ziyanda tells David his only hope of saving the lives of his children is to give up his evil ways. Thula resigns from the club. Wandi forges Lu’s signature and hands in the request for a DNA test.
THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL
MONDAY TO FRIDAY ON SABC 1 AT 6PM Stephanie has a spiritual epiphany. The Forresters celebrate a traditional Christmas together. The Logan family shares a cathartic moment. Brooke decides to take Stephanie up on her offer. Eric tells Stephanie his plans for the future, which do not include her. Donna accepts Stephanie’s offer. Taylor is led into temptation. Donna reveals a dark secret to Eric. Stephen Logan is a free man. Taylor catches Nick and Brooke in an intimate moment. Taylor’s true feelings about Baby Jack’s birth are revealed. Jackie vows to reunite Nick and Brooke. Brooke runs off with Baby Jack. Eric catches Donna kissing Jake.
SCANDAL!
MONDAY TO THURSDAY ON ETV AT 7.30PM Shakira’s excited that she’s meeting her contact for the ATM bomber story; she dismisses Tino and Erin’s concern for her to be careful. She is attacked and beaten up. Maletsatsi’s pottery obsession is getting out of hand. Mo realises the time has come to choose between Alex and Zwelakhe. Abigail rewards Cole’s request to become more involved with RT’s by giving him 50 percent ownership of the establishment. Palesa reveals to Lefa that she wants to have a baby. Lefa tries to find out more about Gosiame’s mother, but Constance keeps avoiding the issue. Tino is shocked into emotional passivity by the death of his mother. Alex can’t help suspecting Daniel. Abigail’s killer is revealed. A crushed Shakira breaks down from the guilt.
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MUVHANGO
MONDAY TO THURSDAY ON SABC 2 AT 9PM The Ramabulanas and the Mukwevhos square off! Meme wants James’ forgiveness. Rudzani is upsetting everyone. James offends Vhafuwi. Pheko and Thandaza make a decision. Mapule is called to testify. Busi goes missing. Thandaza and Pheko confront Meme. Humbulani shocks her family. Busi agrees to take a stand and Doobsie makes an entrance. The judge makes his decision. Vele fires Lufuno. Mulalo tries to reconcile with Humbulani. Azwindini discovers that money is missing. Doobsie puts Busi first. There is chaos at Mukwevho Milling and Azwindini is livid. Tshepo is sick in hospital. Thandaza thinks about the past.
DAYS OF OUR LIVES
ISIDINGO
MONDAY TO FRIDAY ON SABC 3 AT 6.30PM Moloi ends the day richer than he started it, but his daughter is not impressed. Priya is nervous about her first scan. Barker tempts Moloi and starts to remove the primary obstacle to his dream. Rajesh makes a proposal of sorts to Priya. Barker finds that Lesedi is no pushover. Parsons and Thandi pass the buck where her father is concerned. Lesedi confides her insecurities to Vusi, and he is more drawn to her. Calvin distances himself from Frank. Rajesh and Priya step carefully through the minefield of their wedding preparations. Len and Johnny dodge a bullet. Calvin wants to move to Cape Town, but will Jess join him?
MONDAY TO FRIDAY ON SABC 3 AT 4.55PM Belle tells Shawn he must get a job before he can be part of Claire’s life. Victor takes Claire to meet a mysterious man with a bandaged face – Philip! Abby meets her geeky cousin, Nick, who is smitten with Chelsea. Nick finds a solution that saves Kayla. Hope asks Bo to move back home. Frankie bids his family farewell. Chelsea tries to apologise to Hope but the moment is interrupted. Chelsea emails the photo of Bo and Billie in bed to Hope, Steve and Patrick. Bo and John find Italian tarot cards in EJ’s safe deposit box which indicates the return of the DiMeras! EJ beats Patrick to a pulp. n
COMPILED BY Nonhlanhla Khumalo PHOTOGRAPHS TV Information Services
SABC 1 AT 8PM amani visits someone about a promise that was made to him. Dumisani and Jason start off on the wrong foot. Dineo’s been given a choice and doesn’t know what to do now. Karabo is shocked to hear the conditions Kenneth is insisting on. Thomas turns his back on his family. Dineo believes that she’s done what’s best for her baby. Kenneth hardens his heart to hide his pain. Senzo’s intrigued by an SMS he receives. Linda makes no bones about what she thinks regarding the Capitec concept. Ace finally gets Kenneth to smile. Ntombi makes a shock announcement to Karabo.
feedback
COOKING WITH
African Flair ooking From Cape To Cairo’s revised edition, featuring the culinary wizardry of TRUE LOVE Editor Dorah Sitole (esteemed former TRUE LOVE Food Editor), was recently launched at Exclusive Books in Hyde Park. Featuring dishes from all corners of the African continent, this edition took Dorah to 19 regions, which she brings to life through unique recipes, breathtaking photography, thanks to photographer Graeme Borchers, and a zest for all things African. The book launch attracted the likes of renowned chef Citrum Khumalo, and food stylists Taryne Jakobi and Mokgadi Itsweng, both whom styled Cooking From Cape To Cairo’s delectable dishes, as well as Dorah’s loyal fans, TRUE LOVE colleagues, family and friends. Welcoming the guests on the night was NB Publishers CEO, Eloise Wessels, who grabbed the opportunity to publish this cookbook, which is sure to be a bestseller just like its predecessor. Foodies, if you are keen to show off your culinary flair with authentic African dishes, this gem needs to be in your cookbook collection. Pick up your copy of Cooking From Cape To Cairo from most reputable bookstores for R250. n
TRUE LOVE Editor Dorah Sitole.
Eunice Moloi and Citrum Khumalo.
TL’s Nadia Goetham and Esma Anderson with Sedica Davids.
Thuli Sibeko, TL’s Zandi Sokhela and Ntsiki Kgame. Eloise Wessels, CEO of NB Publishers.
Dorah and her grandson, Sifiso, are flanked by his parents, Nhlanhla Moleya and Sibusiso Sitole.
PHOTOGRAPHS Justin Barlow
The staff at Exclusive Books take a breather between selling books.
Tumelo Sebopa, Dorah Sitole, Mokgadi Itsweng and Taryne Jakobi.
Dorah autographs copies of Cooking From Cape To Cairo for Abina Chikurunhe, Lorraine Mphahlele and Molly Gandiya.
TL’s Lindsay Anne Cilliers and Garth Breytenbach.
Health, Wellness, Powerful Self-motivation...
It’s time to believe in magic! With Amazing Thailand as our destination, The Winning Style event on 27 August at The Venue in Melrose Arch will rejuvenate your senses.
Set as a powerful motivational event, the evening is hosted by the Tourism Authority of Thailand. Poet, creative strategist and campaigner for women's rights, Mmatshilo Motsei will be speaking about her personal journey to health. Herself an owner of a spa and retreat, Mmatshilo is a personal motivator. She is especially known to advocate the use of art in healing. Facilitating the evening will be Nonhlanhla Mjoli-Mncube. She is not only a businesswoman of note, but a founding member of Alpha Women, a business networking project stretching accross Africa. Holding qualifications and degrees from the Harvard Business School, the Institute of Technology of Massachusetts, the Wharton Business School and the Universities of Cape Town and Fort Hare, Nhlanhla was an economic advisor to the former Deputy President. She is also a founding member of SAWEN and sits on various boards. Complimenting the theme of the celebration of senses is singer Thembisile who will be performing her hits Imbokodo, Themba Lam' and Dali Wami. Thailand is one of the world's top ten destinations. There are countless fantastic seaside resorts, fine dining, exciting entertainment, and not least of all, Thailand is a haven of spiritual healing and renewal. Known for its health and spa resorts, Thailand it is the ultimate wellness destination.
WS tyle
inning
Power is taken not given!
NONHLANHLA MJOLI-MNCUBE President of Alpha Women’s Network
MMATSHILO MOTSEI
VENUE:
The Venue, Melrose Arch, Melrose
TIME:
6.30 for 7 pm.
DATE:
Thursday 27th August 2009
COST:
R270 p/p includes dinner & select drinks. Cash bar available.
DRESS:
Cocktail Or Evening Dress.
Entertainment by Thembisile
Phone 011 883 8829, then confirm your booking by depositing the cash into the following bank account at any branch of Standard Bank - Account name: Wine & Roses - The Agency; Account number: 420106081; Branch Code: 001255; Branch: Standard Bank Rivonia. Then fax your deposit slip together with your name to 011 883 8830 or book online at pr@wandr.co.za
Let Playtex seduce you with this season’s hottest designs, such as the Lace Glamour Support Bra.
www.tourismthailand.org
Lights! Camera! Action!
The evening of Thursday 28th of May saw some 200 young women attending the June Winning Style at The Michelangelo Hotel in Sandton. Speakers Uyanda Mbuli and Ipeleng Mkhari spoke about personal style and business success. The event also platformed Daisy Gama, brand ambassador for Inecto, Lindiwe Gumede of Playtex, Dorah Ditshwene from the new Mageu Number 1 Smooth and Rebecca Nxumalo from Spekko Rice. The menu included a spicy Thai coconut and butternut soup, a Thai Green Chicken Curry and fruit platters. Mpho Mashigo, music compiler from Yfm was totally transformed by David John. Her "new" look included an off the shoulder ballgown from Lady Marmalade.
WIN TWO TRIPS WORTH R16 500 EACH TO AMAZING THAILAND Bangkok , a shoppers' paradise, is the destination for two of the people who will attend the The Winning Style events this month. Flown by Singapore Airlines to Bangkok, known as “The City of Angels”, our winners will stay at the luxurious Lebua State Tower in Bangrak in Bangkok. Part of the Preferred Hotels & Resorts, this hotel was designed to make guests “feel on top of the world”. The hotel features some of the top restaurants in the world, such as The Dome. Our winners will be flown to Thailand by Singapore Airlines and their travel arrangements made by Travel Associates.
Rules:1. The judges' decision is final & no correspondence will be entered into. 2. The winners will be announced at The Winning Style on 27 August in Johannesburg. 3. The prize includes return airline tickets from Oliver Tambo Airport in Johannesburg to Thailand. 4. The prizes must be taken up within 6 months, or forfeited. 5. Winners must have their own travel documentation such as passports. 6. Prizes are not transferable or exchangeable for cash. 7. Winners who cannot attend the function, will be notified by telephone on 27 August 2009. 8. The prize includes a 5 day stay inclusive of breakfasts at The Lebua State Tower in Bangkok. 8. All other expenses such as transfers in South Africa, spending cash and other meals are for the winners' own accounts. 9.The organisers and their agencies will not be held responsible for any mishap that may occur in entering the competition or taking up of the prizes.
wine&roses
To stand a chance to enter, SMS "THAI" to 35476, followed by your name & city in which you live. SMS costs are R3.
www.travelassociates.co.za www.singaporeair.com
READER EVENT
IF YOU CAN IMAGINE IT, YOU CAN ACHIEVE IT! Leading financial services group Old Mutual has unveiled Soul Sessions, an exciting, interactive series of nationwide lifestyle conferences with the sole intention of motivating existing and potential customers to achieve success.
O BE CONNECTED
ld Mutual Soul Sessions are about planning for success, setting goals, power networking, getting inspiration and, most importantly, having fun. With dynamic speakers covering various topics, this five-hour series of lifestyle conferences will encompass topics that are relevant to life, work, success and fashion. With a packed programme delivered in four cities around the country, guests attending the Old Mutual Soul Sessions will quickly and confidently get to grips with networking, current affairs, the best in lifestyle and much more. The Old Mutual Soul Sessions will provide a rare opportunity for people on the move to share opinions, identify opportunities and take advantage of current and future trends.
BE INFORMED
Join the experts as they share their secrets of success and purposeful living. Learn how to recognise opportunities and turn adversity into triumph. The sessions will combine discussions, interaction and learning with entertaining and unique experiences. They will bring together like-minded people who are interested in investing in their success and who are looking for brands to help accelerate this journey and partner them for life. In planning the Old Mutual Soul Sessions, the organisers deliberated on topics that would be relevant to people on a determined career path. With this as its focus, Old Mutual Soul Sessions offer a holistic approach to success in business, finance, lifestyle, relationships and personal endeavour.
BE ENTERTAINED
The Old Mutual Soul Sessions are delivered in an informal chatshow format, which is entertaining, personal and will prove far more interesting for the audience than listening to speaker upon speaker throughout the conference. To keep you entertained and informed at the same time, the sessions will include well-known TV personalities Sophie Ndaba (Generations) and Fezile Mpela (Erfsondes) as hosts, and eloquent speakers such as TRUE LOVE Editor Dorah Sitole, Economic and Political Analyst Mohau Pheko, and comedian Ndumiso Lindi, among other interesting personalities.
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HOSTS Sophie Ndaba
The ever-popular Sophie Ndaba may be one of the most successful actresses of our time, but sheâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s also a motivational speaker, popular MC for corporate functions, and a successful businesswoman specialising in dream weddings and interior decorating.
Fezile Mpela
A dynamic host is integral to the success of an interactive show such as Old Mutual Soul Sessions, which is why the popular screen and stage actor, Fezile Mpela, will be hosting the 2009 sessions once again. Last year he delivered beyond expectation, and audiences can look forward to more of the same.
ENTERTAINMENT Ndumiso Lindi
Funny man Ndumiso Lindi had people on their feet cheering at the end of every Old Mutual Soul Sessions 2008 show. Therefore, it was a natural choice for Old Mutual Soul Sessions 2009 to call him back for an anchor. Be prepared to witness Ndumisoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s sharp wit and humorous take on life.
Panelists Dr Mohau Pheko
Whether it is genetic engineering or agriindustry affecting small farmers, the ideology of a free market system affecting welfare and trade union achievements, or economic partnerships and fair trade agreements, Mohau Pheko will be at the forefront, reminding the big players in the world that we are all human.
Professor Harry Dugmore
Few people are as connected to the pulse of Mzansi’s future than Prof. Harry Dugmore. He appears monthly on Redi Direko’s 702 and 567 Cape Talk radio show, helping listeners to Make Friends With Money and get on top of their financial affairs. He’s also the author of the bestseller Nelson Mandela: A Life In Cartoons.
Lifestyle Dorah Sitole
TRUE LOVE Editor Dorah Sitole is an international award-winning celebrity chef, and an accomplished cookbook author and travel writer. Dorah is an asset to the Old Mutual Soul Sessions 2009 where she will share her passion for women’s magazines and the culinary arts.
Busisiwe Mahlaba
In addition to hosting the popular magazine programme Motswako on SABC 2, Busisiwe Mahlaba is also a director at Afrilink Investcorp and a consultant for The UCT Unilever Institute of Strategic Marketing. Before jumping at the opportunity to host Motswako, Busi was the editor of TRUE LOVE magazine for three years.
Networking Nikki Akanbi
Dynamic networker, impressive multi-tasker and multi-skilled professional are all the terms that best describe Nikki Akanbi and her abilities. A natural-born communicator with experience in marketing and public relations, the conferencing and hospitality industries, business tourism in Africa, restaurant chain supervision and personal management, you won’t find anybody with a more connected little black book!
INSPIRATIONAL Hein Wagner
Professor Patrick Bond
Renowned for his views on corporate globalisation, neoliberalism and crony capitalism, Prof. Patrick Bond is a popular speaker and lively guest lecturer at global conferences and civil society organisations. He also serves as visiting professor at numerous universities around the world.
SOUL SESSION DATES AND VENUES
Gauteng Saturday, 5 September 2009 The Venue Conference Centre Johannesburg
Mpumalanga Saturday, 3 October 2009 Ingwenyama Lodge Nelspruit
Western Cape KwaZulu-Natal Saturday, Saturday 10 October 2009 19 September 2009 The Grandwest Casino Hilton Hotel Cape Town Durban TICKETS COST R250 AND ARE AVAILABLE AT COMPUTICKET NATIONWIDE.
CURRENT AFFAIRS Joe Mwase
With an impressive pedigree in Economics and Commerce, Joe Mwase has been a force in corporate South Africa for 20 years. This year, he will be hosting the panel discussion on bridging the divide between rich and poor and wealth creation for all.
Considering all his daredevil achievements, it’s surprising to learn that Hein was born blind! Known as the “blind man with vision” he helps the sighted to “see” through his motivational talks, team building and interactive workshops. He adds a new dimension to positive thinking, selling skills, diversity training and beating the odds.
OLD MUTUAL SOUL SESSIONS ARE DESIGNED TO EDUCATE, MOTIVATE AND INSPIRE. IF YOU ARE AMONG THE BUSINESS LEADERS OF TOMORROW, YOU CAN NOT AFFORD TO MISS IT!
FEEDBACK
DOES
T
he applause from the crowd was like thunder as TRUE LOVE Editor Dorah Sitole welcomed everyone to the 2009 TRUE LOVE All A Woman Needs Day – the energy was electric and we all knew from early in the morning that this would be a day to remember. Wow, and what a sizzling line-up of celebrity guest performers – the super-talented Judith Sephuma, the soulful, award-winning Lira, the unforgettable Unathi Nkayi and the man who brought the “house down” with his bumping beats, HHP. And let’s not forget that we were all looked after by Tumisho Masha and Carol Manana, who were the perfect hosts for a perfect event! A host of inspirational speakers, marketing gurus, life coaches, stylists and fashion experts, as well as expert financial advisors from Old Mutual were also present to impart pearls of wisdom to everyone in attendance. But the dazzling fashion show, featuring local design favourites such as Stoned Cherrie, RJKay, Edgars, Bride & Co., Artistic Soul, Machere, Soulchild Closet and Rotary Watches, were undoubtedly the highlight of the event, although those lucky fish who won the awesome cash prizes of up to R25 000 might beg to differ! A big thanks to all our loyal readers who enjoyed the day with us.
WE WOULD LIKE TO SAY A SPECIAL THANKS TO OLD MUTUAL FOR PARTNERING WITH TRUE LOVE AT OUR EVENT.
WORDS Hayden Horner PHOTOGRAPHY James Mould, Michael Edwards, Devon Krige
THIS YEAR’S TRUE LOVE ALL A WOMAN NEEDS DAY IN ASSOCIATION WITH OLD MUTUAL WAS, ONCE AGAIN, A SMASHING SUCCESS!
IT AGAIN!
The crowd found it hard to decide which of the equally attractive client stalls to frequent first. After all, with leading brand names, Edgars, Temptations, Bride & Co., Rotary Watches, Clinique, Iman Cosmetics, Ponds, Vaseline, Shield, Sanex, Dark and Lovely, Organic Root Stimulator, Caivil, Black Silk, Black/Up, Spekko, Mageu Number 1and Arrive Alive, showering readers with free samples, gorgeous gifts and posh prizes â&#x20AC;&#x201C; most of the crowd were left feeling like kids in a candy store.
KEEP READING TRUE LOVE FOR NEWS ON UPCOMING EVENTS!
P L AY BY KEMONG MOPEDI
Dr Precious Moloi-Motsepe and Kaizer Motaung Jr.
Iko Mash and Precious Makgaretsa.
AFRICA’S FASHION RISES
Mzansi’s celebrities and fashion icons recently gathered at Lekgotla restaurant in Sandton City to celebrate the launch of Arise Africa Fashion Week.
PHOTOGRAPHY Oupa Bopape
Penny Lebyane and KB Motsilanyane.
PONDS FLAWLESS RADIANCE
Ponds recently launched their new beauty product range as well as their “7 Days to Romance” advertising campaign at a starstudded event at Summer Place in Hyde Park.
Lindy Zokufa, Unathi Nkayi, Mazwi Vezi, Cuma Mashicila, Siphokazi Ngxoweni and Bulelwa Mashicila.
Fikile Moeti.
Tanya Manganyi and Rosette Mogomotsi.
AKON ROCKS JOZI Jafta Mamabolo and Andy Magazz.
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R&B artist and musical sensation, Akon, recently shot his music video in Soweto and performed at trendy Club Inc in Braamfontein.
Claire Mawisa, Mechelle Mochali and Anele Mdoda.
PHOTOGRAPHY Des Ellis
PHOTOGRAPHY Oupa Bopape
JR Bogopa and DJ Naves.
TRUE LOVE
ALL A WOMAN NEEDS
AUGUST 2009 NO 366