Tidbits Grand Forks - February 15 , 2018 by Tidbits of Grand Forks - East Grand Forks

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February 15, 2018

Issue # 1,056

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• The Heinz Company figured that if red ketchup was good, green ketchup would be even better. Called EZ Squirt, it was released in 2000, followed shortly after by purple ketchCALL ME TODAY. up and blue ketchup. They followed that with Mystery Color, which could be purple, orange, or teal. Special nozzles made it easy to State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company 1301900 State Farm Indemnity Company, Bloomington, IL draw colored pictures or write words when State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company 1301900 State Farm Indemnity Company, Bloomington, IL dispensing the product. Colored ketchup was popular at first, selling 25 million bottles the first year, but by 2006 it had outlived its novelty and was discontinued. Carpet Cleaning • In 2002, Ore-Ida, which is owned by Heinz, www.elitecarpetsgf.com thought that a way of improving upon their poCarpet Cleaning • Carpet tato empire was to release a line of new prodCleaning SPECIAL! ucts called “Funky Fries.” Instead of boring Upholstery $199 •Cleaning French fries, you could have Kool Blue French 5 Rooms, Hallway fries, or Cocoa Crispers (chocolate-flavored & 1 Stairway • Water Not valid with any other offer. fries) or Cinna-Stiks (cinnamon-covered fries). Extraction Expires 3-31-18 Turned out blue fries look moldy, chocolate Residential & Commercial fries turned everyone off, and cinnamon fries were so cloyingly sweet that they were more like a dessert. By 2003, this line of new po701-775-8500 tato products had been withdrawn from the shelves. Yet, for a short time in history, it was House of possible to put green ketchup on blue fries. ™

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FOOD FLOPS (continued):

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• The company that manufactured Reddi-Wip, which freed people from having to whip their own cream, experimented with a new product designed to free them from the onerous chore of frying bacon. Called Reddi-Bacon, it consisted of four pre-cooked slices of bacon enclosed in a foil packet along with a paper towel to absorb grease. Just pop the entire packet into your toaster and wait for hot crispy bacon to pop up. Unfortunately, the bacon grease congealed inside the foil packet had a disconcerting way of melting under the heat of the toaster and dripping into the hot toaster coils, starting grease fires. The product died before ever being released to the public. • In 1998 Kellogg thought they would simplify the complicated process of pouring milk over a bowl of cereal by packaging the whole kit and caboodle together. A single serving of cereal was packaged with a single serving of shelf-stable milk which would stay fresh at room temperature. A plastic spoon was included as well. The product was dubbed “Breakfast Mates.” It was doomed from the beginning for four reasons. First, it was placed in the refrigerated section of supermarkets because people are turned off by roomtemperature milk, no matter how safe it is. Yet, people never thought to shop for breakfast cereal in the refrigerated section of their supermarket. Second, it cost $1.50 for a single serving, which was about the same price as a whole box of cereal or an entire gallon of milk. Third, though it was marketed as a way for kids to get their own breakfast while the parents slept in, it turned out that prying open the package of milk was far more difficult than unscrewing the lid to a gallon jug of milk, so the milk tended to spill all over the kitchen counter. Fourth, when stored in the pantry or kitchen cabinets at home, it resulted in warm milk on cold cereal, when everyone prefers cold milk on cold cereal. The product struggled for two years before dying. ...continued

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FOOD FLOPS (continued):

• Gerber’s baby food company made a serious miscalculation when they marketed a line of food for grown-ups in 1974. Called “Singles,” the product consisted of delicious and inviting meals for one: Creamed Beef, Beef Burgundy, Chicken Madeira, Beef with Mushroom Gravy, Mediterranean Vegetables, Blueberry Delight and more. All were packaged in over-size baby food jars. It turned out that no one wanted to be caught eating Gerber’s baby food for adults. • In an effort to compete with coffee, the Pepsi company released a new product in 1989. Called “Pepsi AM,” it contained “all the sugar and twice the caffeine” as regular Pepsi. With 28% more caffeine than a cup of coffee, it was designed to give extra morning pep. They found in short order that people just don’t want to drink Pepsi with their bagels or eggs or donuts; that people tend to prefer hot drinks with their breakfast; and because the product was named “Pepsi AM” people didn’t think about drinking it at other times of the day. • Heublein was a company that manufactured alcoholic beverages, later branching out into food products as well. But they had a spectacular failure in the mid-1970s when they came out with Heublein’s Wine & Dine. It looked like an upscale Hamburger Helper, and it included a tiny bottle of wine. On the surface it looked simple and straightforward, which is why people didn’t bother to read the complete directions. They boiled the pasta, added the sauce mix, stirred in the ground beef, then popped open the tiny bottle of wine to enjoy a drink with their dinner. However, the wine was supposed to be added to the pasta sauce and stirred into the meal, not sipped from a wine glass. Various seasonings and salt were dissolved in the wine, which tasted great in the sauce but terrible when drunk straight-up. The product died a speedy death. ...continued

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• On Feb. 21, 1828, the first printing press designed to use the newly invented Cherokee alphabet arrives at New Echota, Georgia. Within months, the first Indian language newspaper in history, The Cherokee Phoenix, was published. • On Feb. 25, 1890, Vlacheslav Mikhaylovich Skryabin, who took the revolutionary name Molotov, is born in Russia. He invented the famous "Molotov cocktail," a flammable liquidfilled glass bottle stuffed with a lighted rag and thrown at the enemy. • On Feb. 20, 1902, famed Western photographer Ansel Adams is born in San Francisco. Adams founded "Group f/64," which was dedicated to promoting deep-focus photography and the use of "straight" images free from darkroom trickery. • On Feb. 24, 1917, British authorities give the U.S. a copy of an official coded message from Germany that Mexico should be asked to enter a war against the U.S. as a German ally. In return, Germany promised to restore to Mexico the lost territories of Texas, New Mexico and Arizona. • On Feb. 19, 1942, right after Pearl Harbor, President Franklin D. Roosevelt signs Executive Order 9066, authorizing the removal of any or all people "as deemed necessary or desirable." By June, more than 110,000 Japanese Americans on the West Coast were relocated to remote internment camps. • On Feb. 23, 1954, a group of children in Pennsylvania receive the first injections of the new polio vaccine developed by Dr. Jonas Salk. Although highly successful, a single faulty batch of the vaccine caused a sudden outbreak of 200 cases. • On Feb. 22, 1980, the underdog U.S. hockey team, made up of college students, defeats the four-time defending gold-medal winning Soviet team at the Olympic Winter Games in New York. The Soviet squad fell to the American team 4-3 before a frenzied crowd of 10,000 spectators. © 2018 King Features Synd., Inc.

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FOOD FLOPS (continued):

• McDonald’s introduced the McHotdog which fizzled in the U.S. but caught on in Japan. The McDonald’s McPizza also failed, as did McSpaghetti. To entice Catholics who were barred from eating meat on Fridays at the time, McDonald’s once offered the Hula burger, which consisted of pineapple and melted cheese on a bun. Catholics didn’t go for it. The McAfrica consisted of beef, cheese, and tomatoes wrapped in pita bread and covered with a sauce supposedly based upon an authentic African recipe. It was released in 2002, at a time when many countries in Africa were dealing with a devastating famine. A public relations nightmare resulted. • In 1994, the Original Pet Drink Company based in Florida introduced bottles of flavored water for pets. The carbonated, vitamin-enriched beverage came in Crispy Beef for dogs and Tangy Fish for cats. The drink was even approved by the FDA for human consumption, in case anyone had a hankering for sirloin- or fish-flavored water, which they didn’t. Neither did the dogs or cats. • In 1997, the Clearly Canadian Beverage Corporation introduced a new beverage that was part drink and part lava lamp. The fruit-flavored drink was spiked with little edible gelatin balls suspended in the liquid. Called Orbitz, and dubbed “a texturally enhanced alternative water,” it tasted like cough syrup and looked odd. People didn’t want textured drinks: you’re either drinking or eating and mixing the two didn’t work. • In the 1970s, American Kitchen Foods thought that if they shaped peas to look like French fries, kids would love ’em. They called the product “I Hate Peas” but it turns out kids hate peas no matter what shape they are in. They also hated “I Hate Corn,” “I Hate Broccoli,” “I Hate Spinach,” and “I Hate Carrots.”

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• The FDA approved it as a food additive in 1996, and in 1998 Frito-Lay rolled out their new line of “WOW!” chips that had been fried in Olestra • In 1968, researchers for Procter & Gamble were experinstead of normal fats. “No fat! Few calories!” imenting with fats that could be easily digested by preshouted the advertising. mature infants in order to help tiny babies gain weight more quickly. Their method was to fiddle with sucrose • However, there were drawbacks. One problem was molecules, manipulating them into configurations that that Olestra tended to bond with fat-soluble vitathey hoped would be easier for delicate digestive sysmins such as vitamin D, vitamin E, vitamin K, and tems to absorb. However, no matter how much of the vitamin A and flush them out of the body. Extra visubstance they fed to babies, the babies failed to gain tamins were added to the products that used Olesweight. tra in order to counteract this. But main problem was that because the fat was not absorbed, it was • What they intended to invent was an easily digested flushed from the body, sometimes in an uncontrolhigh-calorie baby formula. What they inadvertently lably messy way. The FDA subsequently required invented instead was a fat-substitute that would pass warning labels cautioning people about possible through the digestive tract without being absorbed into side effects such as gastrointestinal upset. the body at all. • They called the new substance Olestra, presumably • People were not very fond of chips that carried a warning label about gastrointestinal upset. Sales from “oil” plus “ester,” with ester being the stuff that of the chips declined precipitously before bebinds the oil to the sucrose. It’s also known by the ing removed from the market, though there are brand name Olean. still products on supermarket shelves that contain • The key is in the molecular structure: triglycerides Olestra, such as some Pringles varieties and Lay’s consist of three fatty acids bonded to a “backbone” of Light Chips. glycerol. But Olestra is synthesized from sucrose and vegetable oil, and it can bond to up to eight different • Procter and Gamble were not done with Olestra, however. It turns out there are other uses for a fatty acids. This makes a molecule of Olestra so gangly, sucrose polyester. Marketed under the name “Seunwieldy, and cumbersome that digestive enzymes refrose,” it’s used as an industrial lubricant and paint leased from the pancreas don’t recognize it as food and additive. Because it’s made by chemically binding ignore the substance. It therefore passes through the sugar and vegetable oil, it has no toxic fumes and digestive tract without being absorbed. The researchis much more environmentally friendly then paints ers had not found the baby formula they were looking made from petrochemicals. It’s used for deck stains for, but they had stumbled instead on a diet food. and as a lubricant for power tools. • The new substance was dubbed a “sucrose polyester,” a synthetic fat substitute made by altering the chemical • There are also practical applications for Olestra as a medicine. Because it binds so readily to so many components of vegetable oil and sugar. It has the satisthings, it can lower cholesterol, it can remove toxfying taste and feel of fat, without adding any absorbins such as dioxin from the brain, and it can treat able calories. poisoning due to PCB contamination in the body.

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Of Grand Forks • East Grand Forks by Samantha Weaver

• It was 19th-century French novelist and poet Victor Hugo who made the following sage observation: "Men hate those to whom they have to lie." • If you're planning to visit the Hawaiian island of Kauai, you might want to trek up to Mount Waialeale. If you do, though, be sure to take an umbrella, as that mountain holds the distinction of receiving more rainfall than any other place on Earth, with an average of about 40 feet -- yes, feet -- of rain annually. • According to the National Chicken Council's annual Chicken Wing Report -- yes, there is such a report, and it is strategically timed for release just before the Super Bowl -- 1.35 billion wings were consumed during Super Bowl weekend this year. That's an all-time high; the number crunchers have determined that if all those wings were laid end-to-end, the resulting line of poultry would stretch 394 million feet. That would be long enough to circle the Earth three times -- or to cross a road 13 million times. • When archaeologists discovered the tomb of King Tut, one of the objects they found inside was a bronze razor -- and it was still sharp enough to use. • Did you ever wonder how the lollipop got its name? A man named George Smith first put the hard treat on the end of a stick, but candy-making wasn't his only interest. It seems that Smith also had a keen interest in horseracing, and he named the candy after a popular racehorse of the time, Lolly Pop. • Those who study such things say that all mammals, from rodents to elephants, urinate for approximately 21 seconds. This is now known as the "Law of Urination." *** Thought for the Day: "The universe is like a safe to which there is a combination. But the combination is locked up in the safe." -- Peter De Vries © 2018 King Features Synd., Inc.

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• The police in Germany were on the trail of a rare creature in 2007: a female serial killer. DNA evidence from over 40 crimes had been linked to her. They had been tracking her for over two years, carefully collecting DNA at the scene of her crimes using cotton swabs. When a young policewoman was brutally murdered in the German town of Heilbronn and DNA was found on the scene, the mysterious and prolific killer was dubbed “The Phantom of Heilbronn.” • A $400,000 reward was offered for information. Experts who analyzed the DNA said the suspect came from an Eastern European background. The Heilbronn police racked up 16,000 fruitles hours of overtime pursuing the culprit without results. Psychics and fortune-tellers were consulted. • Police were perplexed, however. They found DNA that was an exact match for the Phantom’s on several cold cases, including a murder dating all the way back to 1993. Her DNA was linked to not only six homicides, but also to a robbery at a car dealership, and a break-in at a school. What sort of serial killer is also a common thief? There was no pattern to her crimes. She burgled a business in Austria, robbed a jewelry store in France, and mugged a woman at a clubhouse in Germany. She stole numerous cars and motorbikes throughout the entire region. DNA that came from other people who must have been her accomplices showed no rhyme or reason. When witnesses described her, they often claimed she was a man. • Yet, her DNA was found on a cup at the home of a murdered woman. It was found on a heroin syringe found in a park. It was found on a halfeaten cookie at the scene of a break-in, and on a stone used for smashing a window. ...continued

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DIFFERENCES: 1. Car is different. 2. Leg is moved. 3. Hair is different. 4. Pocketbook is missing. 5. Sign is different. 6. Basement window is missing.

answer

PHANTOM KILLER (cont'd):

• The newspapers declared the Phantom of Heilbronn to be, “the most mysterious serial criminal of theDell. past century.” Answer:

• Then in A 2009, police investigated the burned VERY LARGE NUMBER of a Kasner man who had been seeking asylum in •body Edward was a mathematician. In 1938 Germany. To positively identify the body, they he was asked to come up with a name for a did a DNA of the on the applivery largeswab number: thethumbprint numeral one, followed cation had filled outHe years earlier. Andyoung there by a he hundred zeros. asked his two nephews namematch they would they foundwhat the exact for thesuggest. DNA of The Phantom. How could this be? How a fe• Nine-year-old Milton suggested could a name male’s get ontoAthecartoon thumbprint of a man out ofDNA the funnies. strip character named wasanvery popular. Milton chose who hadBarney filled out application in a governBarney’s last name for the number. ment bureau years ago? And that’s when somesuggested: “Usethe a different cotton swab.” •one Kasner announced new name for the big number in his next book, altering the spelling. The second swab, done with a cotton swab by a Larry different showed •manufactured Sixty years later, Pagecompany, and Sergey Brin a new internet DNA. search engine. Other nodeveloped trace of the Phantom’s search engines searched each webpage and • The one thing that all of the DNA samples had ranked them according to how many times a inspecific common is that they had been but collected usterm appeared on them, Page and ing cotton swabs manufactured by the same Brin designed their search engine to search for plant in Austria. The same the specific term and thenwoman find outwho howworked many atlinks the plant had been in charge of packaging up there were that led back to that page, which resulted in a better engine. with the swabs. The swabs weresearch contaminated her DNA. Cotton swabs are sterilized • They decided they needed a namebefore that being used to collect DNAwebsites samples,the but wherereflected how many search was searching. They tookviruses the name asengine sterilizing removes bacteria, and of Edward Kasner’s very large number, only fungi, it does not destroy DNA. Skin particles, they misspelled slightly, on so itthe ended upswabs being sweat, and saliva itremained cotton spelled exactly the same way the cartoon even after they were thoroughly sterilized. The character Barney spelled his last name. What’s Phantom of Heilbronn never existed. it called? (Answer at bottom of page) • Whereas German police should COMPUTER FACTShave been relieved to find that the mysterious female serial • In 1981 Bill Gates said, “640 kb of memory killer it would also be disoughtdidn’t to be really enoughexist, for anybody.” heartening to think of the thousands of man• Moore’s Law states that computer performance hours wasted chasing a phantom — and of the doubles every 18 to 24 months, and ever since 401971, criminal investigations this has been true. that were now back to square one. • HP, Google, Microsoft, and Apple were all started in garages. THANKS FOR READING Answer: Google, from googol. TIDBITS!

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