9 minute read
A Journey in Pink - Part IV: Bonna L. Nelson
and have sent them cards in return. They also sent a handmade tote bag with personal items and a journal. I sent a donation and plan to become a correspondence volunteer.
I was asked by a University of Maryland Shore Regional Health nurse and communications specialist to write about my breast cancer experience during Covid-19. My story was submitted to and published by a national consumer website, Very Well Health, which is an award-winning online resource for understandable, reliable health information. My story was included with a few other women’s stories about struggling with breast cancer treatments during the pandemic restrictions.
Most recently, I was asked by one of my nurses if I wanted to participate with a peer support organization to help other women with breast cancer. She thought that I would be a good mentor. I thought it would be a great opportunity to send it forward and that I would enjoy helping others going through treatment. Sharsheret is a Jewish organization that serves women of all faiths diagnosed with breast and ovarian cancers. I was interviewed by phone, participated in a webinar training session, received a training manual by mail and await my first assignment.
TIP #5: Practice good sleep habits. Get 8 hours sleep for healing and wellness. Two other aspects of life should be mentioned because both contribute greatly to wellness and healing. Sleep is one. Sleep during treatment was sometimes difficult due to the localized discomfort from surgery as well as chemo and radiation side effects. Special pillows and doctorapprove over-the-counter medications helped, as did soothing music and aromatherapy. Frequent naps were my friends, and on many days my body demanded two-to-threehour naps. Post-treatment, I am needing fewer naps and mostly sleep well by practicing good sleep habits, including sticking to regular sleep times, reading quietly before bed
and eliminating caffeine or heavy food late in the day.
TIP #6: Surround yourself with family and friends and a support system to share and help each other.
Socializing is another healthy and necessary practice. We will be forever grateful for the love of our family and friends and for their staying in touch via visits, Zoom sessions, FaceTime, texts, emails, calls, cards, prayers, flowers and meals. It was healing and uplifting to see and feel the love that surrounds us. Our outside, distanced gatherings gave us a chance to laugh and talk about things of interest to family and friends and took us out of the cancer-focused loop.
My new precious life journey will include the medical checkups, fun exercise routines, moving more, eating less and clean, practicing gratitude, sending it forward, 8 hours of sleep and spending time with family and friends. I will treasure each moment of every day and count each day as a blessing.
I will continue to write, not about cancer, but about our beautiful Eastern Shore and about, hopefully, more trips to local and exotic locales (when the pandemic allows) and other topics to benefit our readers. I will dabble in the visual arts again. I will plan more great adventures that don’t involve doctors and hospitals.
I was inspired by other cancer survivors’ stories and photographs in the book Picture Your Life After Cancer. The stories were solicited from readers of The New York Times and published by the American Cancer Society. They have influenced my thoughts and decisions as I move forward with my life post-cancertreatment.
Life changes after a cancer diagnosis and is never the same afterward. Cancer both changes and shapes your life. I consider it an opportunity to learn and grow and update my bucket list with what I still want to do.
I discovered more about myself. I learned that I am stronger than I thought I was. John said that I was stronger than he thought he would be under the same circumstances. I was surprised and do not agree.
I have become more self-aware. I have become more aware of and in tune with others. I find myself
continually thinking of how to help and support others the way that I was so generously and kindly helped and supported.
I can more easily let go of the mundane distractions in life and, at the same time, value the routine. I am trying to laugh more and find humor in life’s absurdities. I crave laughter. I heal from laughter. I am trying to be only positive, joyful, blissful, cheerful and eager to return to normalcy, whatever that is.
I asked my husband, John, my partner, primary supporter, caregiver and best friend, for his thoughts as we close this chapter on our lives. He said that like the COVID pandemic changed our lives and lives around the world, the cancer diagnosis was also a major game-changer for us. Coming for us in the middle of the pandemic, it was a punch in the gut, a totally unexpected surprise, wholly unwelcome, disruptive and the cause of huge changes. He wondered where it came from. Why did it happen?
He is thankful for the knowledge and expertise of our medical team, who gave us confidence, and in our own research, which added to our trust and ability to make decisions. He thought that our education made it more manageable. He shared that it was emotionally hard and stressful and that he tried to be sensitive, patient, sympathetic and compassionate. I can confirm that he was. He upped his game!
He is glad to have his partner back. He didn’t mind all of the driving to Baltimore for radiation treatments because we both agreed on that
treatment program. He was fi ne with and is still doing all of the shopping and meal preparation (I am still at risk for infection and so do not go to stores, etc.).
He thinks we have come out of the experience stronger, happier and healthier, and with a greater appreciation for the early detection and treatment of the cancer. He is hoping that the treatment worked, knows that it is a wait-and-see but we are prepared for whatever comes our way and moving forward. I am glad that he is attending to his medical checkups, enjoying time with his friends and again pursuing his interests in archery, dog training, fi shing and hunting.
Meanwhile, I am cherishing the thought that I am a survivor. I am in remission. It’s time to celebrate. In celebratory gestures, our daughter, Holly, created a collage of photographs from my Pink Journey, and John planned a two-week family getaway. It’s party time!!!
I have initiated my new precious life journey. What better to use as a guide than Ralph Waldo Emerson’s Defi nition of a Successful Life:
To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the aff ection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to fi nd the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
Special Note: Many thanks to Anne and John Farwell, owners and publishers of the Tidewater Times, for allowing me to share my Pink Journey with readers and for their love and support during my adventure. It has been an empowering experience for me, and I hope others have benefi ted from my sharing.
Some helpful websites:
Susan G. Komen: https://secure. info-komen.org/
Sharsheret: www.sharsheret.org/ Hope Scarves: https://hopescarves.org/
The Lydia Project: https://www. thelydiaproject.org/
The National Breast Cancer Foundation: www.nbcf.org
The American Cancer Society: https://www.cancer.org/
Bonna L. Nelson is a Bay-area writer, columnist, photographer and world traveler. She resides in Easton with her husband, John.
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