A N
A U TO B I O G R A P H Y, J O U R N A L , &
S C R A P B O O K
T I F FA N Y K . N G O
Story of a Girl. Don’t judge a book by it’s cover. You know my name, not my story. Not yet, but you will, and you’ll remember it. My life isn’t some sappy love story, though at times I wish it were. My life isn’t average, and my life isn’t like any
other traditional Asian family either. My life, is well, me. The person who I have become and am turning into, as well as my thoughts and beliefs, are all thanks to the past experiences with those who were my friends at the time, and of
TENNIS TOUR NAMENTS
L O N G WA L K S
course, my family. So honestly? The past is quite important in my opinion. Without our pasts, we’re all empty canvases that haven’t been touched. And trust me, my canvas is definitely an abstract piece of artwork.
COLL EGE IN TERVIEW S
Blast from the Past. This is where my story (where it counts), begins. Ninth grade at Davidson High, NJROTC . This is where I made all these wonderful friends who have been the through think and thin. re NJROTC taught me so many thi ngs, just as many memories it gave me Without this organizatio . n, be a completely differen I would t person, surrounded by complet ely different people. This is truly a
place where it’s about teamwork, trust, hard work, and loy alty. So many battles have been fought, from the office to the classroom to the drill field. Blood , sweat, and tears also won Sally & I the place medal at the Battle first of New Orleans. NJROTC was the glue that kept our friendshi p together for so long. Even thoug h most of us has grown apart, we ’ll always be bonded by these memo ries.
DH S NJ RO TC
Transferring to ASMS in the middle of my high schoo l career was definitely a big decis ion I made, especially when I was doing so well in NJROTC. But it was definitely a decision that I do not regret. Despite all those late night cram sessions to never ending hours of studying to all the boy drama, I really enjoyed my time at ASMS. Just like any other high school, there were the bad times. I couldn’t even count how many times I’ve punched my wa rdrobe and had to ice my hand, or even how many hours I spent crying in the middle of the night. But most importantly, I kept on sm iling through it all, in public tha t is. In War 101, never let your enemy know your weakness.
B O T IC A S M S RO
S
ns, iggest passio One of my b Because technology hy? robotics. W the world, and I will r ve o ke ta will became a botics team ips and ro is h T . it d ai dsh gh all of har family throu ugh I may have only ho challenges. T e team and help th r fo R P n as bee d there, it w an screw here xciting two years. e definitely an of travel, endless rs u o h ss Endle ndless kering, and e hours of bic , we, as a team, rk hours of wo
p notch making a to succeeded in t. On one of these o working rob huge mistake, and a e ad m I s, ip l the tr ported me al hool, p su my team sc a boarding way. Living in read like wild fire. I sp at rumors will ly positive th te lu so ab as w id sa e av ould h someone w someone, but no. It to g in th at maybe some I realized th tually at th n e th ac was onesty could loyalty and h . ily exist in a fam
When and Where, Now and Then.
ALANA
GREG
BISHOP
The people that we meet in our lifetime has a lot to do with where we are and at what time. At the end of eighth grade at Clark Magnet, I was offered the choice to attend Murphy’s IB program, or Davidson’s EPIC program. Being a student going into engineering, I chose going to Davidson, even if it meant leaving my middle school DYLAN
friends behind who were attending
ALEX
Murphy. Then two years later, I applied to attend the Alabama School of Math & Science. Again, I did not hesitate, because this was for my future. Between these three schools, I have met such amazing people. Some are still around, while others I no longer keep in contact with. Either way, I’ll know in my heart that they have C AMELLIA
impacted my life.
HEATHER
L I LY
JOHN
DREW
A N D RE W People: Past, Present, and Future The people who we are today, are much impacted by the company that we keep. I will not be afraid to admit that I am afraid of commitment, not because I do not have the ability to. But because I’m afraid to suffer from having an ambiguous loss. There are those who came and left. Then, there are those who came and stayed, even when I slammed the door in their face. From my these past experiences, I’ve learned that not everyone was meant to stay in your life. That, maybe, just maybe they were only meant to make an appearance, long enough to leave their mark. Unfortunately, after so long, letting go becomes a natural process. I can admit that for those who have decided to stay in my life, I have put them through hell and back. But who’s to say they haven’t done the same to me? But that’s life. As much as I would like to believe there is someone out in this universe that would not hurt me, it’s not true.You have to decide for yourself who is worth all the pain and heartache. As cliche as this statement can be, it stands true. And honestly? I can’t say that many of the people who have been in my life are the worth the heartache that they have caused me. But why focus on the negativity? For those who have stayed as long as they have, I will be eternally grateful. They have impacted my life in such a way, that I feel in order for anyone to understand the person who I have become, that these people need an introduction. And that’s exactly what they’ll get.
FROM  PUSHING  DESKS  AT  EACH  OTHER  TO  THROWING  SCISSORS  IN  MIDDLE  SCHOOL,  OUR  FRIENDSHIP  HAS  ALWAYS  BEEN  UNIQUE.  HONESTLY?  HE  WOULD  BE  THE  LAST  PERSON  I  WOULD  HAVE  THOUGHT  I  WOULD  GROW  UP  WITH,  THROUGH  HIGH  SCHOOL  AND  HOPEFULLY  THROUGH  OUR  LONG  JOURNEY  AHEAD.  HE  HAS  BEEN  THERE  THROUGH  MY  DARK  DAYS,  AND  HE’S  NEVER  LEFT  MY  SIDE.  PEOPLE  CAN  SURPRISE  YOU,  AND  HE  DEFINITELY  HAS.  HE’S  MY  BRO.
S A L LY I’VE  NEVER  RESPECTED  MY  ASIAN  CULTURE,  TILL  I  MET  HER.  THE  BEST  FRIEND,  AND  JUST  LIKE  ANY  GOOD  FRIENDS,  WE  FIGHT.  ABOUT  BOYS  TO  HOW  WE  SHOULD  DRESS  ON  OUR  DOUBLE  DATES.  FROM  LATE  NIGHT  PHONE  CALLS  TO  TAKING  STROLLS  ON  THE  BEACH,  IF  THERE’S  ANYONE  THAT  KNOWS  EVERY  SINGLE  ASPECT  OF  MY  LIFE,  AND  UNDERSTANDS  ME  MORE  THAN  ANYONE,  IT  WOULD  BE  THIS  GIRL.  THOUGH  IT’S  TAKEN  ME  A  WHILE,  I  FINALLY  UNDERSTAND  THE  MEANING  OF  SISTERHOOD.
CLINT I  DON’T  EVEN  KNOW  WHERE  TO  BEGIN.  FROM  BEING  MY  SHOULDER  TO  CRY  ON,  TO  TEACHING  ME  HOW  TO  DRIVE,  HE’S  BEEN  THERE.  WE  FIGHT  LIKE  CAT  AND  DOG,  AT  THE  END  OF  THE  DAY,  WE  KNOW  THE  IMPORTANCE  OF  OUR  FRIENDSHIP.  IF  I  COULD  HAVE  SPENT  THE  LAST  FOUR  YEARS  BEING  A  PAIN  IN  THE  BUTT  TO  ANYONE,  I’M  GLAD  IT  WAS  HIM.  HE  TAUGHT  ME  TO  HAVE  SELF  RESPECT,  CONFIDENCE,  INDEPENDENCE,  AND  COURAGE.  THE  MOST  VALUABLE  LESSONS  I  COULD  HAVE  LEARNED. Â
L I V E . L AU G H . L OV E .
Love, Friendship, & Everything in Between. Love and friendship can be such a tricky path. For me, I must admit that I have trouble keeping other girls around. Why? The answer is simple. I’m a girl, and I know what girls can be capable of. Manipulation and betrayal being the two things that I am terrified of being the victim of. Sure, boys are definitely capable of doing the same things, but they don’t care enough to put in the energy. Girls on the other hand, use it on a regular basis. I’d be lying if I were to say I don’t use it either.
Being friends of the opposite gender is a battle in itself. Especially when the other person has a significant other, jealously starts to play a bigger role, as well as manipulation. This is probably the situation that I have been in more than anything. The majority of the company that I keep are boys. Despite the rumors and name calling of the general public, there’s no drama and no issues, just genuine fun, care, and adventure.
TIFFANY ’S PRINCE CHARMING 1. CUTE SMILE. 2. MAKES ME SMILE.
My entire personality revolved around my idea of love and romance. Or, at least it used to. I used it as a guidance to the girl who I wanted to be, thinking that the girl I wanted to be, was the girl the boys wanted. And It wasn’t until recently that I realized that it should be the other way around. I should be who I am, and then, only then, would I find the right guy for me. No lies and no pretending.
Honestly? Being me has never been easier. I’m the girl that can just wear Nike shorts and tshirts all the time, likes to wear make up, sing in the shower, and not give a care in the world about what others thought of me. The only person who I need to satisfy is myself. Ever since I stopped caring about what people said, I have attracted more boys in two months than I had in two years. Now prince charming, oh how I love fairy
tales. Sometimes I resent Disney for making me feel as if finding prince charming was just easy. When I realized it wasn’t, I made a list of all the qualities I wanted my prince charming to have. Now when I made this list at age ten, it had silly things, like he had to have brown eyes. Now, at the age of 17, those qualities have obviously changed. I consider my list to be my standard for a boyfriend.
3. INCREDIBLY ROMANTIC. 4. WELL-EDUCATED. 5. GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR. 6. HAVE DREAMS & GOALS. 7. RESPECTS ME. 8. BE PATIENT. 9. BE UNDERSTANDING. 10. 100% LOYALT Y.
I won’t let loneliness drive me into the arms of someone who doesn’t really care about me.
Romance? Confession #1 I have always been that girl, who would always take her own advice. But as always, there are exceptions. I always gave my girlfriends (the very few that I do keep around), that if a man were to treat you wrong, you should walk away. For the most part, that’s what I usually do. Except, this boy who I will name Jake*. I have known him since the summer of sophomore year. At the time, I was dating his friend. This friend of his, was just like any boy in my world at the time, with one goal: to get into my pants. Of course, his friend was never able to. From what I have learned over the course of these recent years, my boyfriend at the time (his friend), tried to put us together. Odd, right? That’s what I thought. So my boyfriend broke up with me, knowing that Jake would be there to take advantage of me. I mean, what girl isn’t vulnerable after a break-up? Well, that’s what exactly Jake did. It worked. I fell for him, and I played right into the palm of his hands. But what I didn’t know at the time, he did actually fall in love with me. He was different, and I couldn’t see it. My self esteem at the time couldn’t have been any lower. I wouldn’t allow this amazing, talent, welleducated boy be with a girl like me. So, I constantly rejected him, even for two years after. “I mean, why would he give me compliments? Why would he call me beautiful? I’m just ordinary. He deserves better.” These lines were the lines that constantly ran through my head. And now, four years later, he’s still in my life. Maybe not as consistent, and maybe he isn’t in love with me anymore, but I’m in love with him, no matter how many times I will deny it to my friends. But it’s no use. It’s too little, too late. *His name is not Jake. Alias used to protect identity.
Oh, love love love. My life revolves around this. Sad isn’t it? I’m a tumblr fan, and each time I log on, I always see the same type of quote. Girls and their independence. There’s so many point of views out there, and to me, they’re all true to some extent. I mean, we as humans should not depend on other humans for our happiness, because we are flawed. At the same time, one of our flaws is that we do depend on each other for happiness, instead of ourselves. I could write about so many love stories, but I won’t. The separate instances of romances that I’ve had isn’t important, but the person I have become as a result of many of those same instances is important. I’ve been lied to, cheated on, and I have had my heartbroken, just like other girls. But I will admit that these experiences have made me a stronger person. But at the exact time, I have become a much weaker person. Because of these experiences, I now lack trust and the desire of commitment - two problems that I’ve never had till now. And let me tell you, I have made decisions now that I would have never even considered in the past. No, I don’t regret these decisions, because at one point, it was exactly what I wanted. Just because I have to doubt the loyal guys in my life, there’s no need to doubt myself. I always thought you’d get the “feeling” when you were with “the one”. But trust me when I say that it’s complete bull. I have always been a hopeless romantic, and quite honestly, I’ve never been happier when I let those thoughts about love free. Honestly, I don’t know if this is my broken heart speaking, or if it’s the person I’m becoming. Right now, I don’t believe in true love, but I do believe in relationships and partnership. For my sake, I hope my beliefs will change in the future.
H I G H S C H O O L G R A D UAT I O N
The finally came, the day each teenager wishes of and dreams about. On May 26th, 2012, I received my advanced diploma with a concentration in physics at the Alabama School of Math & Science, the 3rd best school in the state. Accomplishment? I think yes. Were those late nights with coffee worth it? Yes. One of the chapters in my life came to end on that day, while another one opened. I met many interesting characters within this chapter of my life, and I wouldn’t have been able to rewrite it any better, even if I wanted to. And now, it’s time to let things come to end, and move onto the next chapter: college. My graduation is one memory that I will hold on to. Thanks to everyone who have supported me up until this point. Much appreciation.
SUMMER 2012 HIGHLIGHTS
TENNIS TOURNA MENT
ALAB AMA ORTHOPEDIC
Summer is finally here. Can you believe it? 2.5 months of nothing much sleep, work, and well, all of this. I went through my entire senior year with 3-5 doctor appointments each week, while keeping up my grades, as well as keeping my tennis game. Now summer’s here, and I have to continue. In late August of 2011, I had sacroiliac joint injury, at the end of the USTA JTT State championships. Since then, I had to go to the Orthopedic clinic to get it taken care of. Their solution? Physical therapy. And let me
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G E O R G I A AQ UA R I U M
tell you, it sucked. I felt like my back wasn’t getting any better, and it was a waste of five months of treatment. Anyway, in the beginning of June, I just completely stopped going. Why? Because someone (Mrs. Helen Clark), told me that me that recovery was also a mental game as it was a physical one. If you let you think you’re sick, your body will react. When I stopped treatment, I believed I was better, and I haven’t had a problem since. Thank you, Mrs. Clark. Anyway, on June 5th, I started my second consecutive
ZOO ATL ANTA
season of USTA Jr. Team Tennis. Wednesdays have become one of my favorite days of the week. It was because of JTT, that I met an amazing friend, and an amazing tennis player, Danni Xin. We have had an awesome season, and it’s getting even better. But honestly? There’s one day this summer that I’m looking forward to the most. What is it, you ask? It’s OU Passport. This is the day that I will get to meet half of my fellow classmates, as well as take the first step of my college experience: registering for classes. But that’s not even the
S PRINGHILL MED CENTER
WORLD OF C OC A -COLA
best part. I get to share this entire experience with the other half of my family that lives in California, who will be coming to Alabama for the entire month of July. After passport, we will be visiting all of these wonderful attractions on this page, even though I’ve been to all of them before. One part of summer I’m not looking forward to? The day that summer ends, but then that’ll mean something completely different. I will finally get to move on with my life away from Alabama, and start my new one in Georgia.
HIGH MUSEUM OF ART
S TONE MOUNTAIN PARK
COLLEGE. The second major step of my life is about to get here, and I have absolutely no idea how I feel about it, nor do I know if I’m ready for it. But I mean, do I really have a choice? It’ll be here August 16th whether I’m ready or not. It’s an exciting thought, nevertheless. I’m moving to a completely new area, surrounded by completely different people. At this point, that’s exactly what I’m ready for, meeting new people. As much as I love reminiscing about the past, a brand new start is exactly what I need. Now, I can’t decide whether or not I want to rush to join a sorority. OU offers three sororities: Alpha Sigma Tau, Chi Omega, Sigma Sigma Sigma. I can openly say I don’t get a long with many girls, but
may be this will be my opportunity to work on that flaw of mine. Anyway, I’m writing this box while it’s still summer. Ironic right? There’s a whole ‘nother 50 days before I move into the dorms.. I’m just so excited for this new adventure. I finally get to meet Ngan, a friend that I’ve known for around five or six years. Not to mention, thanks to facebook, I have been able to meet some quite amazing people. I mean, they do say the friends you meet at college will last for a lifetime. In this situation, I sure hope it does.
TENNIS. Despite all the horrible stuff I had to deal with through ASMS, I am thankful for one thing. I found my passion for tennis, thanks to Coach Allgood. At ASMS, we had a physical education requirement each year.You could earn through it through the variety of classes such as fitness for life, swimming, cycling, ping pong, etc. Or, you could play a varsity sport. Well, the tennis class was offered the winter term of my junior year. I decided to take it, and I fell in love with it ever since. But I’d have to say I
couldn’t have possibly gone through it without Greg Tate and Aaron Murphy, who were my rocks throughout both varsity seasons, junior and senior year. Not to mention, Greg has also been my rock throughout our two summer seasons with USTA Jr. Team Tennis as well. It’s only been two years with this sport, but it feels like I’ve been playing for much longer. And the best part is?I get to play collegiate tennis for Oglethorpe, NCAA Division III. I just ordered my uniform, and I am proud to say, I am a lady netter.
July 1, 2012
TEXT MESSAGE RECEIVED TONIGHT.
I never really anticipated in starting my journal until college started. But quite honestly, I don’t think I can wait any longer. Today marked a new day in history. Broken-hearted, again. By the same boy.You know, you thought I’d learn my lesson after three years, but apparently not. I can’t help but to feel like such a fool. Why can’t I stop crying over such a vicious asshole? Well, I can tell you a probable reason why. Because I care too much. I have always gotten screwed over because I have cared too much. I always put so much more effort into anything I do, and for what? Nothing, nothing in return. But you know, I was doing just fine this summer. After he left for camp in May, he hasn’t spoken to me since two weeks ago. He came back, not me. I was finally moving on. But I’ve realized, each time that I have moved on, he comes back. He always comes back, especially when there is a new guy in the picture. I wish I knew why, but I don’t. As much as I don’t want to be that girl, you know? That girl that relies on another guy for happiness. I have always been independent. But just like any other girl, there’s always one guy that could break her. He just happens to be mine. But then I think, do I seriously want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with me? No, I don’t. And maybe that’s where the story should end.
August 6, 2012 I’m going to sound like a broken record. As much as i try not to care, and it never works. Lately, people have been telling me to be more positive. And every time I hear it, the first thing that comes into my head is why. Why do I need to be positive? I remember those days long ago, where I was always positive and always had a smile on my face. And for what? For me to become disappointed even more in the long run? Today, I went to the doctor. It was make it or break it. I have been going to the doctor and physical therapy every week for exactly a year. At my last visit, the doctor said I had a 80% chance that I was finished with this injury. Well, today he tells me otherwise. He tells me I may have to continue physical therapy for yet another year if I don’t want my back to be fucked up in the long run. And do you wanna know what the best part was? The summer surgery I had for my arm went wrong. They have to re do the entire surgery. Just peachy right? This is a pure example of why I am never optimistic. Being a realist has definitely helped me. Don’t get me wrong, I love to smile and to laugh and to be happy. It just doesn’t happen very often. And I don’t see the point of faking it. But, I am genuinely trying. And I guess that’s just gonna have to be good enough for now. On a positive note, these past few days, I have met some pretty amazing people. For example, I found out that Maggie is my roommate, and my awesome suite-mates are Christy & Morgan. Angel has been entertaining me while I do nothing. Cody secretly makes me smile when he makes fun of me, and laughs at my awful attempts at jokes. And
one of the highlights of my summer so far? pretty hilarious oovoo midnight conversations with Edmund, Thuc, Jordan, John, Evan, Lara, & Maddie. As of today, there are 10 days left before I move to Atlanta, & I couldn’t be any more excited for this new adventure.