Venture magazine by tim conner

VENTURE VENTUREMAGAZINE.COM JUNE 2011

THE 3D EDITION

4. 6. 9. 10. 12. 14. 16. 22. 25. 26. 28. 30.

TELL NO-ONE!

URBAN EXPLORATION WHISKY IN THE CITY THE RAT RACE PARKOUR

BALLS TO FOOTBALL

EXPLORING THE GRASSMARKET

LIFESTYLES OF THE RICH & FAMOUS ‘TIL DEATH DO US PARTY

PLAN B @ SNAFU, ABERDEEN SHUFFLE UP AND DEAL MORBID TOURISM

EDITOR SUB-EDITOR FEATURES-EDITOR PHOTOS&ADVERTS DESIGN PRODUCTION

ADELE STEWART RAY MCROBBIE JULES JOHNSTON DANIEL DIACK

MELISSA CLARK

CHRIS FOOTE

• JULES JOHNSTON •

TELL NO-ONE!

magine a place where the movie you go to see doesn’t stop at the screen. Where the characters step out and walk around dragging you with them into the deranged world in which they inhabit. This is Secret Cinema, and after having it loosely described to me on a tube journey, I was intrigued to say the least.

As I neared the tube stop I started to notice others like me, unsure of what they were doing, but dressed in their best 40’s get up. Then we heard the cinema begin. Chanting, screaming and shouting, a group of men marched through the streets carrying placards bearing the logo of the Secret Cinema, speaking only in formulated lines from a film I was yet to decipher.

This is a movie review, but of an entirely different form of movie.I bought a ticket for a Friday night “The director is on his way!” showing for £35, and was told that I was to arrive dressed from the 40’s at a designated tube station, “Did you hear? He got the part!” nothing else. “Hurry, we can’t be late for the audition!” Over the next two months they teased me with seemingly random snippets of information, quot- Just like those around me, I instinctively followed ing everything from Joy Division lyrics to ancient until we reached a dilapidated warehouse with a poets through increasingly cryptic emails and Twit- spiralling queue reaching beyond where I could see. ter posts.By the time the evening finally came I was I diligently waited.From the moment I stepped infrantically searching the net for some kind of answer, side, I found myself in a 1940’s Covent Garden, suryet remained none the wiser. rounded by a variety of food stalls and bars.

I also found myself confronted by an ageing man in dimmed, and yet again Joy Division track ‘She’s Lost a slightly-too-tight policeman’s outfit, staring right Control’ began blaring through the speakers as we were herded towards the central stage. Here a frankat me. ly terrifying display of somewhat psychotic dancing “‘Ello ‘ello, what did you do in the war?” he barked took place as a “Girl in Red Shoes” captivated the in a faux-military voice. I stammered a laughing re- audience before the lights dimmed entirely, and a sponse, unsure of the man’s intentions; he didn’t bodiless voice announced us to go to our set screen. wait for a proper reply anyway. When the time came for the film three hours after “Wait boy, don’t tell me, you were a pilot! I can tell my arrival at the stage, I was still none the wiser as to you see, your top button is undone, my army never what I was about to see. would’ve let you away with that!” I was speechless and confused by what was going on until the man As the film began, everything I had seen previousturned to another and accused him of being a spy, ly began to make a bit more sense and the cryptic and the girl with him a lady of ill repute. Twitter clues fell into place. Over the course of the evening I grew more accus- The whole experience was amazing and undoubttomed to being accosted by hidden actors, even as edly the total unknown is what made it so, bringing their moves became more intense, grabbing audi- sense to the Secret Cinema mantra of “Tell No-One”. ence members and bringing them onto a central stage to take part in everything from clown rou- And I won’t. tines to dances.As the night culminated, the lights

• CHRIS FOOTE •

URBAN EXPLORATION

Glass crunches beneath my feet. Daylight streams in through the tall bay windows and casts long shadows across the concrete floor. Outside it’s a warm spring day and I can hear children playing in the next street, but inside, the silence is oppressive.

this dark. The shutter clicks and the sound bounces around the room, echoing away into the darkness. I hold the camera close to my chest to dull the sound.

A narrow corridor opens up into a huge red-brick room. Spools of rotten wool hang from colossal I’ve broken the first rule of urban exploration - never looms, seized up and rusted solid. Three huge bargo it alone. Disused buildings like Broadford Works rels have burst and leaked across the concrete floor, in Aberdeen are dangerous and urban explorers find staining it a putrid acid green. safety in numbers. The abandoned factories and disused buildings targeted by urban explorers are fre- On the far side of ther room, somebody has prized quented by squatters, junkies and scavengers - bed- open a pair of thick steel elevator doors. The safeding-down, shooting-up and picking apart what’s ty cable has snapped and the elevator has crashed left behind. I pull my camera from my bag and adjust through the ground floor and into the basement, the lens for the low light. I didn’t think it would be a twisted hunk of steel and machinery. Across the

doorway, somebody has scrawled “the Entrance to Hell” in luminous red paint.

ers, more extreme eqipment like GPS beacons and geiger-counters are a necessity.

Somewhere behind me something moves in the blackness. The blood pounds in my ears. A flock of starlings burst from a collapsed vent, spewing dust into the air. There’s a complaint amongst the most dedicated urban explorers known as “pigeon lung” - a rasping cough caused by inhaling the dust and chemicals found in abandoned buildings.

I pack away my camera and take a last, long look around. Outside, the light’s fading, and as dangerous as urban exploration is during the day, it can be deadly at night. Rule number three - leave everything the way you found it.

Rule number two - be prepared. Urban explorers protect themselves with respirators, steel-toed boots and hard-hats. In places like Nagasaki in Japan, which has become a hotspot for urban explor-

Urban explorers look for broken windows, busted doors and rotten boards, I scramble up a bust packing crate that somebody has pushed up to the window - the same way I came in. I scramble out of the shattered window frame, blinking in the fading light and pulling my bag behind me.

• MELISSA CLARK •

Who introduced you to whiskey?

Are there plans for expansion?

Nobody actually. I decided that if I was going to focus on Scottish food and drink then I would start with whiskey. I am completely self-taught and now I actually love it! It’s so strange how I ended up here - if someone had told me three years ago I would be working in the whiskey industry I would have laughed, but here I am!

At the moment I am based in Edinburgh but have big plans to develop the business both on a domestic front and overseas. The whisky industry is massive and I want to show visitors the best that Scotland has to offer in terms of an authentic food and drink experience.

Where does your passion come from?

WHISKEY

INTHECITY

A 26-year old Falkirk-born woman has decided to break the stuffy, old man drinking stereotypes of ‘Scotland’s Water’, whiskey. Kerry Johnstone, a food and tourism graduate, is combining her degree skills with her love of whiskey in order to create a new and intriguing business. ‘Whiskey In The City’ is the entrepreneur’s project which involves tours on the Royal Mile in Edinburgh and introducing the spirit to a younger, female audience. Kerry wants to share her love for the drink and move away from it being male dominated and show young women the greatness of the spirit. She is also is starting up an online magazine to share events, news and cocktail recipes using various whiskey varieties.

I have always had an interest in food and drink and I have worked in a lot of well respected restaurants. I seem to have just fallen in love with whiskey which surprised most of my friends and family. I just love the way it makes me feel - it puts a fire in my belly.

Where does your passion come from? I have always had an interest in food and drink and I have worked in a lot of well respected restaurants.

Why do you think whiskey is associated with males?

Who do you aspire to be like?

Before I started working in the industry I always imagined that whiskey drinkers were mostly men, I think if you look back at the advertising over the last hundred years it has been specifically targeted towards men. I also think that a lot of women are put off by the strong alcoholic taste and the idea of drinking straight spirit. This is why I am introducing whiskey cocktail recipes within the online magazine and am looking to incorporate some into my tours.

In business I would admire people like Alan Sugar and Richard Branson. They have worked their way up from the bottom and proved that anyone can achieve success if you put your mind to it. I would love to be as successful as them one day!

“I want to bring out the sexy side of whiskey! ” How do you plan to change the stereotypes?

I think the industry is already changing; almost 35% of whiskey drinkers are now female. Women are actually more sensitive to the nose and taste of whiskies and the tasting notes can be extremely creative and unique. There is also a lot less calories in whiskey than wine. Other ways I want to appeal to women is through whiskey and food pairings, and cocktails. There is a whiskey for everyone and the key is to keep trying them until you find your ‘one’. Once you do, you will be hooked just like me!

Are there any perks? There are so many amazing whisky events! However, one of the best ones I have been to recently was the Gordon and McPhail event at Edinburgh Castle where they launched the Glenlivet 70 year-old. The bottle is retailed at £13,000 and there are only a limited number of bottles available so I was extremely lucky to be able to sample it. Where do you see yourself in ten years? I would love to have my own restaurant somewhere in the country with an extensive whisky bar, and somewhere I can continue researching and writing on food and drink.

facebook.com/whiskyinthecity

• ADELE STEWART •

RAT

THE

RACE

They offer some entertainment if they don’t make it or their rucksack gets stuck between the doors as they close. What follows is silence, only drowned out by the blare of the tube. You can be so close to someone As a headlight appears from the tunnel bodies ap- that you can tell what they had for breakfast that proach the yellow line and wait patiently for the morning but yet the idea of actually talking to the doors to slide open. As tube etiquette goes you person clutching the pole so tightly next to you is give way to people leaving the tube but there is absurd. always that one that sneaks in. Bodies fill the carriages and the lucky ones reach a seat that often On the very odd occasion you will hear someone involves sly shoving followed by an innocent smile. commenting on the weather and the whole tube will listen in out of boredom. Heads are either Next is the race to grab a pole near the door. Hands looking up at the unappealing ceiling or glancing fly out to grasp the undeniably filthy beam. After down to check out everyone’s choice of footwear the pole is covered with floating arms its then a for that day. The really talented can read the daichoice as to whether hold the bar above you and ly newspaper or play Tetris on their phone whilst hopefully not to be so unfortunate as to squash bobbing around. Your luck couldn’t get much next to someone with body odour or place your- worse if you’re placed next to a sneezer. With self between people which act as your bodyguards hand sanitizer at the ready you can wash away the for the inevitable movement in the carriage. unthinkable level of germs. Just like at the cattle farm bodies queue up, ready to get to the escalaThen there are the risk takers who launch them- tor. Reaching the top you can finally smell the fresh selves towards the open doors before take off. air...well almost fresh. onday to Friday, 9 to 5 - your typical working week in London. And for those who don’t opt for driving or cycling to work, their day begins with the delightful tube journey.

• JULES JOHNSTON •

PARKOUR P

arkour. To many people the word is nonsense. To those who know what it is, most would think it suicide. To those who have developed a love for the fast spreading extreme sport, it’s a way of life.

into better shape, but I was sick Translated as ‘The Mountain of having to run around things.” of Arts’, the thriving square is centred around a lavish glass As we stand in Mont des Arts conference centre. It features art park, looking down over the from Belgium’s best and brightest city, it’s far too easy to see as well as historic monuments how the extremely culture- to the nations’ colourful past. proud city gets in the way. “From a tourist perspective it’s In Brussels, hidden amongst idyllic, but from an athletic view the chocolate shops and waffle it’s just annoying,” laughs Tom. houses, this way of life is being practiced by an unlikely group. He uses the term athlete loosely. From his Looney Tunes t-shirt “Running just bored me,” to his immaculately clean wheezed Tom De Baker as the trainers the man standing in 40-something visibly struggled to front of me doesn’t exactly regain his breath, “Sure it got me look the sporting type.

“Brussels was

just getting in my way

”

• JULES JOHNSTON • In fact he couldn’t seem further from those I almost felt sorry for him - that was until I realised stereotypically seen practicing the sport. Yet looks that he was laughing at my fall... can be deceiving. “That was by far the worst bit of Parkour I have Without a word Tom leapt up onto the slope beside seen in my life.” I couldn’t argue with that. us, sprinting up, before leaping a gap to climb onto a wall. I stood in my place, dumbfounded. This As extreme sports go, Parkour is ideologically translator, who simple. A mixture minutes ago had of running, been wheezing j u m p i n g , like an ageing climbing and smoker, was now falling is used running about in to get between a way that would A and B in the make most fastest way superheroes possible. At all look tame. His times they try next leap landed to maintain a him perilously constant speed on a ledge throughout, overlooking mapping the the park, high best route in enough that if he mind, constantly fell his chances looking for new of ending today direction. u n i n j u re d were poor. Yet “To us it’s just a he remained way of keeping unfazed as he ran fit and having on, laughing like fun. It’s a quest a lunatic, before to find that finally jumping illusive perfect down to the spot where square below. any trick can be performed, “Come on, give it and to try to do a try!” he shouts something never up at me. I did. tried before by the people I wanted to prove around you. Oh, I could do this, so I and to avoid tried to better his the police - they run. Sprinting at a wall I leapt up, hoping to grab don’t like you running on the statues.” the top and pull myself up. Instead I misjudged the jump and ended up lying on my back on the As the evening continued and it became harder to concrete with no idea what happened as I groggily see, each run became steadily more perilous and stood back up. daring, until finally: By the time he reaches me Tom looks ready to “I’ve got to go, my wife will kill me if I’m late.” And collapse. As he stood there struggling to breathe off he limped.

• DANIEL DIACK •

Chess boxing was thought up by the Dutch artist Iepe Rubingh as a performance in which the themes of a healthy spirit in a healthy body and aggression management played a role. In a fight, the two opponents play alternating rounds of chess and boxing for up to six rounds. A round of chess takes four minutes and each competitor has twelve minutes on the chess timer. The boxing lasts three minutes and there is a one-minute break between boxing and chess so they can change their gear.

• DANIEL DIACK •

Bog snorkelling is a Welsh event that consists of competitors completing two consecutive lengths of a 60yard trench through a peat bog in the shortest time possible. Contestants must wear snorkels and flippers and complete the course without using any swimming strokes, relying on the power generated by their flippers.

A controversial baby jumping festival is held each year in Castrillo de Murcia in Spain. Anyone who has a newborn baby in their family can bring them along to the event, known locally as El Colacho, which has taken place since the 1620’s. It is thought that the practice wards off the devil and is meant to cleanse newborns of all evildoing.

BALLS 2

An annual event in the small town of Hunterville, New Zealand involves men eating bull’s testicles. The competitors have to bite into the balls and carry them 50 metres in their mouths. Once they accomplish that, those involved scoff dry Weetabix and a raw egg before washing it all down with a can of beer.

TO FOOTBALL

The London Olympics in 2012 is the aspiration for all athletes with just over a year to go until the games. However, you won’t see these competitors at the Olympic Park or the Velodrome when Olympics fever hits the country.

to remain on foot for the descent, injuries are normally minor and competitors, particularly the successful ones, enter again year after year.

Hockey will feature at next year’s Olympics but it certainly won’t take place underwater.The aim They will still be taking part in of the game is to move a puck some, could we say, unusual across the pool floor and into sporting events that occur all the opposition’s goals. The sport is played worldwide and is fast, around the world. furious and fun! Events that won’t be featuring at the Olympics (possible be- The Red Bull Air Race, created in cause they are simply too crazy) 2003 and involving contestants include the Gloucester Cheese flying through air gates in the quickest time possible, is both Chase. insane and high-velocity! This event returns in June after it was cancelled last year due to From the UK and the States to safety concerns - but that didn’t South America and Oceania, you stop competitors taking to Coo- couldn’t imagine events like this per’s Hill for an unofficial event. but you really do have to see Although it’s nearly impossible them to believe them!

• CHRIS FOOTE & JULES JOHNSTON •

EXPLORING THE

GRASSMARKET I

t’s possible to visit Edinburgh for a day with no agenda and come away having discovered dozens of hidden gems. Jules Johnston and Chris Foote travelled to Scotland’s Capital to see what they could find.

Bollard Work. 85 people balanced on 85 bollards for 85 minutes. They’re short by 50 people, but he’s optimistic. As we speak two more people join in, pulling their thick wool coats close around them. It’s a poor day for a stunt like this and people are struggling to stay upright.

Armstrong’s is an Edinburgh institution. Tucked away in the city’s Grassmarket, people have been The wind doesn’t bother him much, but it’s not his rummaging through the store’s eclectic merchan- first time - in the last six months he’s performed dise for more than 150 years. two more of these stunts (Bin Work - one man, one bin, three hours; Balancing Work - five people, ten Armstrong’s is filled with tourists snapping away at stilts, four hours). It’s a theme. the weird décor - almost the first thing you notice when you walk through the door is the full-sized We leave Andrew balanced precariously on his golden sarcophagus. We squeeze by and head for bollard and head for the Art Roch, a hostel which the back of the store. opened on the Grassmarket last October. We’re taken on a tour by Sam, the Art Roch’s butler. The narrow corridor opens up into a high-ceilinged chamber packed wall-to-wall with clothes. Bat- Hostels the world over seem to have a reputation tered leather suitcases litter the bare wood floor, for being basic at best, with little style or finesse bursting with brass-buckled belts and worn-out put into furnishing these stop-off points for budsuspenders. get travellers. However tucked away in the shadow of Edinburgh Castle lies Art Roch, a unique take on In another chamber, chandeliers hang from above, the whole experience. draped with brightly-coloured beaded necklaces. A neatly mustachioed mannequin swan-dives from While the building looked unassuming from the the rafters. We browse idly like most of the tourists, outside, the small windows allow a view into a repawing through racks of leather jackets and trying ception area littered with an assortment of chairs, on odd hats, but we leave empty-handed. taxidermy, artist musings crowned by a retro Space Invaders game. The promise this view delivered Upon leaving Armstrong’s, we asked a couple of made it too much to take and we had to go in for students sitting nearby what’s going on. “I think a look. it’s art”. The leader of the group, Andrew Gannon, explains that it’s a performance art piece called The staff couldn’t have been more helpful,

• CHRIS FOOTE & JULES JOHNSTON •

providing our own tour guide and open access to explore the many floors and rooms of the hostel. The converted Salvation Army building opened as a hostel in February 2010 with aims to provide high standards and cheap prices in the middle of a recession.

nights put on for the entertainment of the guests.

Decorated throughout with a mismatch of design and salvage, the building houses 127 beds across a mix of mass dormitories and private rooms, as well as enough facilities to ensure a comfortable stay.

“To the customer, my name is Sebastian Gainsbourgh. It’s my job to do what they want - they even get the option of whether they want a smooth or a rough butler. It’s a great job, and good fun too.”

On the upper floor lies a lounge area with an assortment of tattered furniture, throws, rugs and the so-called “filth tent” - we declined to enquire further. A raised platform in the centre plays host to performances from local bands as well as theme

Similar to many European hostels Art Roch declines to serve alcohol on their premises but actively encourage people to go out and sample what Edinburgh has to offer. Art Roch will also soon be opening its very own bar opposite the hostel.

For the customer looking for a more hotel-like experience, the very top floor offers five of the luxury rooms with double beds, showers and even the option of their own personalised butler.

• CHRIS FOOTE & JULES JOHNSTON•

• CHRIS FOOTE & JULES JOHNSTON •

• ADELE STEWART •

LIFESTYLES

OF THE

RICH&FAMOUS From Paris to Milan, New York to London, we were loaded with every element of fashion brilliance for 2011’s Autumn/Winter Fashion Weeks. September will be a busy month for Fashion Week fans. Those lucky enough to be invited will have their calendar full to the brim with events and shows crammed over two weeks in four different countries. Tickets are like gold dust - very hard to find but worth a fortune when you manage to get one. Even without a ticket, many venture across these countries just to follow the buzz around this fashion event. There is no better way to find out the latest styles than to take part in the very expensive, ever more popular hobby of following Fashion Week around the world each season.

exclusive showings of designers’ new collections is at Somerset House. If after the shows you’re still dying for more glamour then look no further than swanky cocktail bar The Savoy, on the Strand. It will require you to dig deeper into your purse but the status and location alone will compensate for the over-priced mouthful.

Milan boasts the greatest designs for Spring/Summer 2012 at no other than Milano Fashion Centre. Even if you are unable to get your hand on a valuable ticket for the shows you don’t need an invitation to check out the glamorous parties or stay in the biggest hotels along with the celebs. The Four Seasons, a popular celeb spot, is one hotel you’ll want to pocket all the room freebies, setting you First place to be ticked on the map is The Big Apple. back over £500 a night. Relaxing over a cappuccino As the first to host Fashion Week, New York likes to along the Via Della Spiga is the perfect place for cemake a lasting impression. Set in a new location leb stalking and where you will find every fashion since 2010 you can now find the ultimate fashion trend out there with the best range of boutiques. catwalks at Damrosch Park at the Lincoln Centre. The shows are inevitably packed with the rich and As Paris Fashion Week commences it is only right famous and if you wish to top up your “I’ve seen to end the holiday in style and there is so much this celebrity” list then definitely hang out in the more to experience than the Eiffel Tower. Fashion places like The Rooftop at the Empire Hotel. Week takes place at the Carrousel du Louvre and after the shows you can hang out with some of With over 5000 visitors attending London Fash- those who attended. To achieve the ultimate rich ion Week each season it tends to create a great and famous lifestyle check in at the Ritz Hotel or Le amount of buzz between designers, journalists, Meurice, which overlooks the gardens famous for celebrities and those who are willing to pay over the annual Christian Dior catwalks. And wine and the odds for a ticket. And the only place to see the dine only at the finest bars, such as L’Avenue.

• RAYMOND McROBBIE •

‘TIL

DEATH PARTY

DO US

“ I don’t know what we were thinking! ” Fed up of your spouse? Fancy a party? is used to smash the wedding ring, an Why not combine the two with a fan- event that gives those involved an exhilarating sense of freedom. tastic divorce ceremony! Divorces in Britain actually fell over the last few years according to a 2010 report released by the Office for National Statistics, but in many countries the rate for splits has soared. Japan is a prime example - a country where the bizarre divorce ritual is becoming increasingly popular. More than a quarter of a million divorces took place there in 2008 alone, despite it still being somewhat of a taboo in Japanese society.

In fact, all over the globe former couples are embracing the possibilities meaning yet another excuse for a party! New traditions now include unengagement rings (to be worn on the “up yours” finger, naturally), ‘Just Divorced’ L-plates and even caskets for wedding rings.

Beating the break-up blues is something people want to get through more than ever in this fast-paced world. The Now couples who believe it is impor- idea is spreading to other nations so tant to end things and move on in don’t be surprised if one day you rean amicable way have taken part in a ceive an invitation in the post to attend special ceremony in which a hammer one of these marriage-busting parties!

• CHRIS FOOTE •

@ PLANB

t’s cold tonight. Bitterly cold. Pretty girls in short skirts huddle in a doorway. A trio of bottle blonde bombshells wink and giggle at the handsome bouncer, who grins and ushers them inside. Plan B are playing an intimate gig at Snafu and a 200-strong crowd of competition winners and fortunate plus-ones have come to watch.

The line moves forward. The couple in front are turned away. Tickets only tonight. The bouncer holds up a hand. “Ticket?” No ticket, I tell him. I’m press. He grunts and points to a pretty hipster girl. “You’d better talk to her”. The girl checks my name and stamps my hand. Plan B aren’t her thing but she’s stuck up here all night anyway. She doesn’t mind. “He’s a total whore, you know? Plan B, I mean. My friend’s got these pictures on her phone…”

• CHRIS FOOTE •

SNAFU

the crowd doesn’t call for an encore. Plan B drops his mic and pushes through the crowd, hands raised in the air like a prize fighter. The band disappears backstage and I order a drink. The barman crushes ice in a bourbon glass and we chat about the show. It was shorter than he’d thought it would be but everybody had fun and that’s what counts, right? The barman points out the back room and I fight my way through the small crowd that’s gathered outside. A frantic brunette grabs my arm, waving a paper napkin. “Please, get him to sign this! It’s for my sister, she’s only 16!” I shrug her off and flash my VIP pass. The doorman nods. He looks exhausted but it’s an important night for his boss, so he’ll stay here ‘til everybody’s gone home.

Backstage the band sign autographs and pose for photos with fans who chatter nervously. ‘B lounges on a sofa away from the crowd, sipping neat vodDownstairs, the place is packed. Throbbing house ka. A pretty blonde in heels perches beside him on music. It’s hot. Without warning, the girl beside me the armrest. He wraps his arm around her, whisperscreams. Plan B have arrived, dressed identically in ing close to her ear. immaculately cut Italian suits. A kid who might be her boyfriend sits nearby, paThe set opens with a cover of Ben King’s soulful tiently waiting his turn to speak. ‘B put his hand on crooner ‘Stand By Me’, punctuated with a reggae his shoulder, flashing an expensive gold watch. He beat. They reel quickly through the hits, ticking off points to the bar and holds up two fingers. The kid the highlights from their latest album, smooth soul grins and disappears into the crowd. mashed-up with grimy white-boy hip-hop. ‘B drains his glass and pulls on his suit jacket. He ‘B leans into the crowd. “Y’know what? Drink, take clamps a cigarette between his teeth and leads the drugs and fuck!” The beat drops. “Who wants to blonde by the hand through the crowd. The band hear the dub-step version?” The crowd becomes follows them out. Gradually the room becomes wild, jerking spastically to the rhythm. It’s good. quiet and the groupies, wannabes and hangersEven a skanked-up Candle In The Wind doesn’t on stagger out one by one, wrapped up tightly in completely ruin the set but it ends abruptly and scarves and gloves. It’s cold tonight.

l f f e

Take a jaunt to some beautiful cities – and win some cash at the same time! If you’re one of the millions of poker fans around the globe, perhaps you’ve thought about saving up and taking a trip with friends to a live tournament. Poker festivals now take place in a multitude of arenas and cities, and with more choice come more opportunity to find a poker break to your suit your needs – and your bank balance. The Montecasino in Vienna, Austria this year hosts tournaments to cater to any size of bankroll, from €300 all the way to the High Rollers Event - a buy-in of €15,000 would see you sitting alongside the biggest names in world poker. As with most events these days, there is opportunity to enter the high stakes games for cheap if you find “satellite” competitions online. The biggest poker room in the Czech Republic is the Card Casino Prague in the country’s beautiful capital city and you can also grab a slice of the pot across many games. The main card room, which operates 24 hours a

• RAYMOND McROBBIE •

day, feat u r e s standard T e x a s H o l d ’e m tournam e n t s as well as a range of side events in Omaha and other poker varieties. If you’re looking for something even more adventurous and out there, look no further than Darwin, Australia. Famous websites such as PokerStars now host events Down Under, and Darwin’s Sky City casino is becoming big news in the poker world. Great Britain doesn’t miss out on the action and is now one of the hotspots of live tournament poker. Edinburgh, Scotland was the setting for last years UK Poker Tour event, held at the same time as the Edinburgh Festival. Expect more card events to take place in this fabulous city in the near future. You can’t go wrong with music, comedy, theatre and poker! Situated on the Gulf of Finland is the port town of Tallinn, Estonia. Tallinn itself is a world heritage site and more people now visit for the historic architecture, great restaurants and of course brand new poker tournaments! The European Poker Tour regularly hosts events in this popular destination.

• MELISSA CLARK •

MOR BID TOURISM

Far from the bustling streets of Paris you are led down a 19-metre descent by an iron spiral staircase into darkness. The sudden change in atmosphere from sirens and traffic to an eerie silence becomes almost nauseating. Welcome to the Catacombs, also known as ‘L’Ossuaire Municipal‘. An underground graveyard is the basic synopsis given to visitors. It’s an interesting alternative - if Disneyland or a boat trip down the Seine is not quite your cup of tea.

• MELISSA CLARK • the death. Staff barely bat an eye-lid as they answer the same questions from tourists about bones, horror and what ghostly events they may have seen, over and over again. This The main downfall has to be the is their version of an average 9-5 job. thin layer of white dust from the Instead of saying ‘can I help you?’, bones grinding upon each other on these employees repeat, ‘no phothe floors. This chalk-like substance tos please’, even after visitors have has the unsightly habit of attaching taken their wanted holiday snaps itself to the shoes, ankles and legs of the people’s remains. Everyone’s of anyone who dares enter. Then dream job is different though. Who again, some people find strangers are we to judge? dressed up as giant mice, hugging children and taking photographs So if Mickey Mouse just won’t cut it, with them just as disturbing. Each leave the metropolitan city behind and head down into the depths of to their own. these creepy chambers. Spend an The employees underground also afternoon wondering around the give off a sense of boredom. Maybe stacks of bones left for you to admire the novelty of working in such a and feel safe in the knowledge that place has worn off and it is just like the only mice you could encounter working at a Disney Land. Except for will be of the small and furry variety. end of the tunnel before you resurface. Unfortunately the exit is some distance away, highlighting the vast size of the underground chambers.

kind of awkward emptiness when underground. An odd sensation, as you are anything but alone. The remains of six million people lie in the underground tunnels once used as a bone depositary. Although packed and stacked to the roof with bones and skulls, you still sense an extremely vacant atmosphere. This area of tourism involves a human’s morbid fascination of visiting somewhere that vast destruction and death has taken place. Battlegrounds, the site where the Titanic sank and ‘Ground Zero’ in New York are all types of ‘morbid tourism’ where thousands of people visit each year to meet their odd curiosities.

Forget about Walt Disney offering open walks above ground in often unbearable, humid heat. Swap this cartoon theme park for the underground’s invite of a cool climate, oddly resembling the The skeletal remains are presented eifeeling of a well air-conditioned shop- ther in lines or the occasional circle formation. As a tourist you almost feel ping centre. trapped with the one-way system domiInstead of the chirpy tunes being fed nating the experience. With death being through speakers as you make your way harboured in such claustrophobic conaround the magical kingdom, there is a finements you want to see light at the