Joke Time

JoKe tIMe Time for a giggle

Here our local ‘Jester’ Chris Sproston, shares with us some of his jokes to help create a few laughs:

After a robbery at the Apple store Police are appealing for iWitnesses.

‘The Alphabet’ contains all the letters of the alphabet. What is ET short for? He only has little legs.

Why did the chicken say ‘Book, Book, Book’? That’s the noise chickens make. I was going to write a joke about time travel but you didn’t laugh.

What do you call a bear with no ears? B Is an indecisive Bee a maybe?

I’m opening a restaurant called Karma. There’s no menu but you get what you deserve. Do dragons sleep during the day so they can fight knights? Chris Sproston

Which branch of the military recruits toddlers? The Infantry. A zombie weightlifter hurt himself deadlifting

I met a man who said he was the most popular person on social media. I said I don’t follow you.

Saw some skinheads running down the street. Balderdash. Is a frozen Labrador a Chilli dog?

What do you call a pig on a leash? Pulled pork. There was a kidnapping at school today. The teacher woke him up. I invented the word plagiarism.

Are circles pointless?

People who don’t like music have my symphony.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? The chicken hadn’t evolved yet.

Is a frozen Labrador a Chilli dog?Never fight an Octopus, they’re too well armed.

volunteer awards Nominate your star volunteer

NOMINATIONS are now open for an annual awards initiative which focuses on celebrating the Staffordshire Moorlands volunteers.

Support Staffordshire is, once again, hosting their ‘Volunteer Star Awards’ - with separate events across the different boroughs and districts across the county.

The 2022 Staffordshire Moorlands Volunteer Star awards will be taking place on the evening of Wednesday, June 29 at Westwood Golf Club, Leek.

A spokesman for Support Staffordshire said: “These awards aim to publicly recognise and celebrate the outstanding achievements and commitment of volunteers and organisations who go the extra mile to support our communities.”

The award categories for 2022 are: Business Contribution to Communities, Personal Achievement, Volunteering Support for Young People, Volunteering Support for the over 65’s, New Volunteer Team of the Year, Volunteer Team of the Year, Trustee of the Year, Young Volunteer of the Year, Volunteer of the Year, Lifetime Achievement.

Closing date for nominations for the Staffordshire Moorlands awards is March 18 at 5pm.

To find out more and to make a nomination, go online to: www.supportstaffordshire.org.uk/volunteerstar-awards.