The Weekender 09-18-2013 by The Wilkes-Barre Publishing Company

weekender

VOL. 20 ISSUE 45 SEPTEMBER 18-24, 2013 • THEWEEKENDER.COM

NEPA’S N No.. 1 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT FREE WEEKLY MORE THAN 172,000 READERS WEEKLY*

NEW COLUMN FEATURES OUR FANTASY FOOTBALL PICKS, P. 10 TROLLEY OF TERROR HAS HAUNTED HISTORY, P. 33

DeAd inside ZOMBIES INVADE SECOND ANNUAL INFECT SCRANTON

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What is your ideal hideout location for the zombie apocalypse?

Rich Howells

Editor • 570.831.7322 rhowells@theweekender.com

Sara Pokorny

Staff Writer • 570.829.7132 spokorny@theweekender.com

‘Prisons don’t work out so well, so maybe an empty police station.’

‘On a boat.’

Kieran Inglis

Jill Andes

‘An island…or a Blockbuster. No one would ﬁnd me there.’

‘Under my bed.’

Media Consultant • 570.831.7321 kinglis@theweekender.com

Inside Media Consultant • 570.970.7188 jillandes@civitasmedia.com

Amanda Dittmar

Graphic Designer • 570.970.7401 adittmar@theweekender.com

‘Anywhere far away from other people.’

It’s no secret that I’m a zombie fanatic, so if I don’t have to drive to Pittsburgh or New Jersey to attend a zombie convention, I’m all for it. Infect Scranton is back for a second year, and the guests are really great, particularly for such a new event. Not only are there three stars from “The Walking Dead” attending, but also a slew of featured zombies from the show and several memorable undead faces from “Dawn of the Dead,” which many believe to be the greatest zombie ﬁlm of all time. (I have a tough time picking my favorite, but I’ve seen “Dawn” at least 100 times.) We talked to both the living and the dead on pages 28, 29, 34, and 35. What makes this convention unique is that it’s not just a convention – there’s a survivor challenge race, a pub crawl, and an attempt to break a Guinness World Record. What more could you ask for? For those who don’t “get” the zombie craze, just note that this whole thing is for charity, so stop by one of the many events this weekend and support some worthy causes. I must also extend a special thanks to Taney’s Costume Shop in Scranton and our photographer/designer Amanda Dittmar for bringing out the dead in us for our front cover and inside image. The only thing more fun than meeting zombies is joining them, so come in costume and impress the professionals. -Rich Howells, Weekender Editor

Christopher Madden Media Consultant • 570.970.7211 cmadden@civitasmedia.com

‘In a place so safe I could tell you, but I’d have to kill you after I did.’

Tell @wkdr what your ideal zombie apocalypse hideout would be. Contributors Ralphie Aversa,Justin Brown, Kait Burrier, Caeriel Crestin, Pete Croatto, Nick Delorenzo, Tim Hlivia, Melissa Highes, Michael Irwin,Amy Longsdorf, Matt Morgis, Ryan O’Malley, Kacy Muir, Jason Riedmiller, Erin Rovin, Ned Russin, Chuck Shepherd,Jen Stevens,Alan K. Stout, Mike Sullivan, Bill Thomas, Mark Uricheck, Robbie Vanderveken, Noelle Vetrosky, Bobby Walsh, Derek Warren Interns Holly Dastalfo, Bill Rigotti Address 90 E. Market St., Wilkes-Barre, PA 18703 Fax 570.831.7375 E-mail Weekender@theweekender.com Online theweekender.com • facebook.com/theweekender • follow us on Twitter: @wkdr Circulation The Weekender is available at more than 1,000 locations throughout Northeastern Pennsylvania. For distribution problems call 570.829.5000 • To suggest a new location call 570.831.7349 • To place a classified ad call 570.829.7130 Editorial policy The Weekender is published weekly from offices at 90 E. Market St., Wilkes-Barre, PA 18703. The opinions of independent contributors of the Weekender do not necessarily reflect those of the editor or staff. Rating system WWWWW = superb WWWW = excellent WWW = good WW = average W = listenable/watchable * Scarborough Research

Online comment of the week.

Dax Shepard@daxshepard1 ‘This Bieber move by Mayweather is counterintuitive to say the least. I don’t know that a “win” is even possible now.’

The Weekender has 12,622 Facebook fans. Find us now at Facebook.com/theweekender

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Melissa Hughes

Weekender Correspondent

…will be partnering with the Scranton Cultural Center for an audio recording of “The Happy Elf?” None other than Harry Connick Jr., who will come to the area to complete the recording for one of his newest productions. This is the ﬁnal piece that will bring the production to life, which premiered in 2012. SCC Executive Director Michael Melcher served as the executive director of the production.

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2013

A returned smile

…can you do to get your creep on the weekend before Halloween? The F.M. Kirby Center has everything needed to send chills down your spine with the just-announced Splatterday! Halloween Film Series. This day-long event will take place on Oct. 26 and feature five flicks, for a very low ticket price of $5 a film ($3 for students with valid I.D.) or all five films for $20. Tickets are on sale now at the Kirby Center box office. The films and times are as follows: “Ghostbusters,” 2 p.m.; “Young Frankenstein,” 4:30 p.m.; “Night of the Living Dead,” 7 p.m.; “Halloween,” 9:30 p.m.; and “Rocky Horror Picture Show,” midnight.

Russello Project, M80, Stealing Neil, 40 lb. Head, Bad Hair Day …is the holiday season right around the corner? (featuring both curBecause tickets for the Trans-Siberian Orchestra are about to go on sale! rent and former band The ﬁnal performances of “The Lost Christmas Eve” will play arenas nationwide, and TSO is bringing the show to members), Gone Crazy, the Mohegan Sun Arena at Casey Plaza Dec. 6 at both 4 and 8 p.m. Zamani, and additional Tickets, which start as low as $33, go on sale Sept. 20 at 10 a.m. and are available at ticketmaster.com, the Pennstar acoustic acts and open Box Ofﬁce at Mohegan Sun Arena, or charge by phone at 800.745.3000. jam time throughout the day. There is a suggested donation of $10 a person at the door. There will also be prizes and raffles throughout the day. For those who aren’t able to attend the benefit, donations are being accepted online at gofundme. com/43mr3g. Any amount is appreciated and all proceeds go directly to Williams and his family. W Rocking For Ronnie: Sept. 22, 4 p.m., Brews Brothers West (75 Main St., Luzerne). $10.

ROCKING FOR RONNIE SCHEDULE

4-4:45 p.m.: Vinyl Daze 5-5:45 p.m.: Iron Cowboy 6-6:45 p.m.: Russello Project 7-7:45 p.m.: M80 8-8:45 p.m.: Stealing Neil 9-9:45 p.m.: 40 lb. Head 10-10:45 p.m.: Bad Hair Day 11-11:45 p.m.: Gone Crazy 12-12:45 p.m.: Zamani 1-1:45 p.m.: TBA

“It is absolutely my pleasure to bring something like this to NEPA. It was my honor as executive director to premiere this production, and it’s just as much of an honor to see the final pieces come together at the Scranton Cultural Center.” -Michael Melcher, executive director of “The Happy Elf”

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Local musician Ronnie Williams has touched the lives of so many people in NEPA. He was voted best solo artist for The Weekender Readers’ Choice Awards the past three years in a row and also singlehandedly started a social movement last year by creating Project Smile, a Facebook page that encouraged our area to create positive energy and pay it forward with happiness. It is time for the community to take that positive energy and pay it back. Ronnie was recently diagnosed with cancer, so his friends have all come together and to give back to someone who has given all he can to so many others. Sunday, Sept. 22 at Brews Brothers West (75 Main St., Luzerne), there will be a benefit called Rocking for Ronnie to help him cover medical costs and living expenses while he is in treatment. When word was put out to the public about the benefit, organizers received a huge response. Ronnie has played with, written music for, and supported so many local area musicians that everyone wanted to contribute to this great cause and show Ronnie that we can all still smile. Doors open at 4 p.m. The musicians playing include Iron Cowboy,

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sept. 18-24, 2013

COVER STORY

Infect scranton … 28-29, 34-35

LISTINGS

the W … 5 concerts … 19 speaK & see … 21 LIve entertaInment … 22 theater … 24 agenda … 36, 50

MUSIC

ronnIe WILLIams benefIt … 5 Wrath of the goat bLacK metaL festIvaL … 7 breaKIng doWn the WaLLs … 10 aLbum revIeWs … 16 charts … 16 cIrque musIca … 18 musIc, motors, and more … 39 fLoodWood … 42 sound party … 49

Sweet harmony Circus meets symphony in Cirque Musica

STAGE & SCREEN

movIe revIeW … 24 raLphIe report … 27 starstrucK … 27 InfInIte ImprobabILIty … 30 doLLy parton’s 9 to 5 … 33

ARTS

noveL approach … 21 thIrd frIday WILKes-barre … 32 scranton haunted troLLey … 33

LIFESTYLE

fIrst and ted … 10, 38 gIrL taLK … 20 sIngLe In scranton … 38 parts unKnoWn … 43 shoW us some sKIn … 43 man of the WeeK … 53 modeL of the WeeK … 54

HUMOR & FUN

puzzLe … 36 cooKIng WIth beer … 40 I’d tap that … 40 pet of the WeeK … 27 sorry mom & dad … 47 neWs of the WeIrd … 47 sIgn Language … 52

role-play becomeS reality Wild West and magical arts at Hickory Run State Park

GAMES & TECH

Into the breach … 37 get your game on … 46 motorhead … 46

ON THE COVER

photos and desIgn by amanda dIttmar voLume 20 Issue 45

See more photoS of our zombie photo Shoot

Bill Thomas

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

Wrath of the Goat reveals the‘negative art’of black metal Weekender Correspondent

WraTh of The GoaT Black meTal fesTival: sept. 21, 6 p.m., the rattler (137 n. main st., Pittston). $10, 21+. Info: 570.299.5054, facebook.com/events/455544277866632/.

ing plans for next year’s Pennsylvania show. “I’ve seen a lot of festivals popping up all over the U.S., but none of them really catered a hundred percent to black metal, especially not on the East Coast,” Bloodcurse says, explaining that he expects

metalheads to come in from all over for the event, from the farthest fringes of the tri-state area and beyond. “Hopefully this event will open up some eyes and also provide something for people who are into black metal but don’t get to go to a lot of

shows because the tours don’t come around here.” What, then, is the appeal of black metal? To attract fans diehard enough to not only travel miles on top of miles just to jam-pack themselves into a music venue like sardines in a can, but also to withstand the ire of the mainstream masses that “just don’t get it,” one suspects there must be more to black metal than just the gleefully blasphemous rebel magnetism of upside-down crosses, monochrome face paint, and illegible band logos. For Jameson, it’s about catharsis.

“The essence of black metal is negativity. There are people for whom that negativity comes as Satanism, there are people for whom it is nihilism, but negativity is the one thread that binds the whole thing together. Black metal is negative music expressing negative emotions and negative ideas,” he says. “Life is an absurd journey. There’s always going to be multiple aspects to everything, different sides to every story, shadows to sunshine… Black metal, to me, is the personiﬁcation of negative art.” W

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Black metal is growing up. According to Neill Jameson, frontman/mastermind of New Jersey-based band Krieg ,the extreme heavy-metal subgenre infamous for everything from cartoonish Satanic posturing to all-too-real criminal violence (most notably a rash of church burnings and murders in Norway in the early ‘90s) has advanced beyond both the destructive behavior and isolationist musical mentality that once dominated it. “When I think of black metal in 2013, I don’t think of that,” Jameson says. “Modern black metal is more idea-based, rather than action-based.” With Krieg being one of the most well-known, well-regarded bands in today’s American black metal scene, Jameson’s observations come from firsthand experience. This Saturday, Jameson will bring that experience with him to NEPA, when Krieg headlines the first ever Wrath of the Goat black metal festival at The Rattler in Pittston. Bringing together such acts as Gravewürm from Virginia, Murrum from Connecticut, Hubris from New York, and Sathanas and Neldöreth from Pennsylvania, the fest offers fans a hydra-headed overview of the current state of American black metal. “Black metal is a sort of music where you can do pretty much whatever you want,” Jameson says. “I understand that we’re steeped in tradition in the aesthetics and the music, but I also understand that this music is 20 or 30 years old. Things are going to evolve. I’m just happy to see that there’s a thriving in this country of any kind of black metal.” As if to bolster Jameson’s talk of thriving, festival organizer and Neldöreth vocalist Oz Bloodcurse reveals just how ambitious he is about the future of the event. In addition to confirming a second Wrath of the Goat to take place in Chicago, Ill., this November, Bloodcurse is already mak-

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Your guide to FantasY FootbaLL Ted Black | Special to the Weekender

LocaL music with titLe Fight’s Ned Russin | Special to the Weekender

Remembering Adam Slamas

It seems all too often that periods in our life are defined by tragedies. Last week, Adam Slamas, a friend and tour mate, passed away. While it’s an unimaginable loss, a great tool for recovery is to recount and reflect on all the times that were shared, and it’s safe to say in the community that there are a lot of memories to reflect on. For me, many the moments I remember most fondly were during the annual Slambfest (pronounced Slahm-Fest) held in the Slamas family garage every summer. The fest was started on a whim to essentially provide a last show for my old band, The Gnarlies. The show went so well that it continued to go on for two more years – each year improving on the last. The fact that Adam and his brother Nate opened their garage to not only their friends but to an entire commu-

nity (even at the risk of swift Kingstonian police justice) is the ultimate testament to Adam’s ability to support the bands, friends, and music that he loved. This is a quality that I could only strive to embody as well as Adam. I spoke a couple of weeks ago about how to book shows and bring bands to the area. When we were in an era where venues were few and far between, Adam didn’t let that hold him back and let us pack kids and bands into his garage. These shows cemented Adam’s love and support for punk and hardcore and continued to show his support by helping out any way he could by touring, putting up bands, and simply attending shows throughout the years. It’s hard to sit here and write about new shows or new records without acknowledging this huge loss, but the best advice that we were given before we embarked on our cur-

rent tour with Title Fight was to live like Adam, and now the only way I can approach this article this week is with that advice. Last time I wrote, I rattled off so many shows and events, so I will give you a quick refresher: Wednesday, Sept. 18 at the West Side Park in Nanticoke, there is a show with Wisdom in Chains, Take Offense, Fire and Ice, Malfunction, and Alive and Well starting at 6:30 p.m. Monday, Oct. 28, also at West Side Park, Disengage, Intent, Demolition, Zoom, and Stand Clear will be playing. I feel fortunate to be able to share not only upcoming shows with you, but also my views and thoughts, and there will never be any way to put into words how much we will all truly miss Adam, but the least we can do is to continue to have shows and have fun just like Adam did. W

Fantasy football fan? Look no further For those of you who passed on a career in the NFL due to a fear of helmet hair or, you know, a concussion, there’s always the next best thing: fantasy leagues. They’re a staple in every sport, allowing the average guy (or girl) to manage a team to the best it can be, whether the “manager” is in the whole thing for the money or simply office bragging rights. I currently manage teams in a 14-team league and a 10-team office league; I’ve been stumbling and fumbling through the world of fantasy football for the past nine years. Each week, I’ll bring you some waiver wire advice (who to grab and who to pass up), the upcoming week’s ranking by position, and this week’s top sleeper candidate. Week 3 Top Adds: • James Starks: When was the last time a Green Bay RB had a 100-yard game? October 2010. There have been 44 regular season games since the Pack had a 100-yard rusher. There’s no telling when Eddie Lacy will return to the Packers backfield, but in the meantime Starks has earned at least a time share (and possibly goal line carries) moving forward. He lacks the burst and lateral movement that Lacy brings to the table, but he’s a power runner who has a knack for finding holes and hitting them hard. Temper your expectations and Starks could be a solid flex/ RB2 if Lacy misses considerable time. • DeAndre Hopkins: Overlooked in many drafts, Hopkins officially had a coming-out party this past Sunday. He is only owned in 49 percent of Yahoo! Leagues and that number is getting higher each passing day. Most defenses will focus attention on Houston’s Andre Johnson, leaving Hopkins in single coverage most afternoons. Johnson left this week’s game early due to a concussion, and that could mean even more

targets for Hopkins moving forward. Regardless of Johnson’s status, Hopkins is a must-own in all 10-team leagues moving forward. • Bernard Pierce: It’s no secret that Ray Rice has been banged up over the past few seasons. He left Sunday’s game with a hip flexor injury and there is currently no timetable for his return. Pierce lacks the game-breaking speed and shiftiness of Rice, but he is a downhill runner who has no problem going through defenders rather than around them. Many people believed Pierce would vulture goal line carries from Rice this season and with Rice’s current hip situation, Pierce may be looking at taking over even more. • Fred Jackson: Everyone who drafted C.J. Spiller realized their nightmare this past week. All preseason the word out of Buffalo was that Spiller would carry the ball “until he puked.” Spiller is one of the most talented runners in the league and the thought of him carrying the ball 30 times a game upped his draft stock tremendously. The only issue for Spiller owners is that this plan has yet to come to fruition. Week 1 saw Fred Jackson total up 17 touches followed by 16 more touches in Week 2. Spiller is a more dynamic player with a tremendous amount of upside, but as long as Jackson is seeing this many carries he is worth an add in your league. Better off without: • Eddie Royal: Royal’s fantasy stock went through the roof after his huge performance against the Eagles on Sunday. He tallied up five touchdowns over his first two games this season. Admittedly, those numbers are jaw-dropping. He’s on pace for 80 touchdowns. Please take a moment and let that sink in. The natural laws of regression will take over, and most likely soon. Keep in mind that Royal has scored a total of five touchdowns over the past four seasons. If your team

is WR starved he might be worth a flyer, but I suggest you realize that Royal could very well be this year’s Kevin Ogletree. • Charles Clay: There aren’t many players in the league similar to Clay. The Dolphins’ coaching staff still hasn’t figured out if he’s a tight end or a fullback (eligible as a TE in Yahoo! leagues and eligible to play RB in ESPN leagues). Clay had his first ever rushing attempt on Sunday and it resulted in a touchdown. I wouldn’t suggest fantasy owners getting too excited about this just yet. Miami’s backfield is already crowded with both Lamar Miller and Daniel Thomas, while Clay figures to be the number four option in sophomore QB Ryan Tannehill’s passing game, behind Mike Wallace, Brian Hartline, and Daniel Gibson. I’d flag Clay as a possible player to watch, but until we have a more defined role for him over the next few weeks he isn’t worth a roster spot. • Montee Ball: I know this year’s second round pick from Wisconsin was heavily touted across draft boards this year but it’s been made very clear that Knowshon Moreno is the number one back in Denver this year. Ball is averaging 2.0 yards per carry and had ball security issues against the Giants this week. Moreno has shined early and has had no problem picking up blitzes and protecting Peyton Manning when need be. Unless Moreno gets hit by a bus, Ball looks to be stuck on the sidelines for the foreseeable future. • Terrelle Pryor: Everyone loves a running quarterback. Everyone. The read-option has become a trendy offense amongst NFL offensive coordinators and a quarterback with a good set of wheels is every

See FANTASY FOOTBALL |38

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Pop punk by any other name just as sweet Whether you know them better as Terror on the Screen or the moniker they’ve more recently adopted, Young at Heart, fact is the Scrantonbased pop punkers are among the most promising, polished acts in NEPA. With that in mind, it’s been more than a little distressing that, in the last four years, the band has hardly uttered a peep. Its first release since 2009’s “This Times for Real,” the five-track EP “Young at Heart” is a return to form that sees the five-piece sizzling with renewed energy. The name change, then, represents something of a rebirth – if not of style, then of

intensity. It’s like the members of Young at Heart had a lot of music bottled up in their bodies in those four years of silence, and it all comes galloping out of the speakers with a fresh feeling of urgency. From the aggressive, brooding buzz of “Haymaker” and “Make It Count” to the bruised, confrontational ﬁnger-pointing of “A Little Too Late” and “The Prowl” to the dynamic, standout melodrama of “If Daryl Dies We Riot,” the band’s sound is as passionate as its heartbroken lyrics. With blood ﬂowing in the same vein as pop punk giants New Found

Neko Case ‘The Worse Things Get, The Harder I Try The Harder I Try, The More I Love You’ Rating: WWWW

‘The More’ we love Neko Case Neko Case’s “The Worse Things Get, The Harder I Try, The Harder I Try, The More I Love You” brings to mind Fiona Apple’s latest winding title – often curtailed to “The Idler Wheel” – not just in name, but in spirit. Both albums tread between different styles, layering complex instrumentation dashed through with moments of grit, brazen vulnerability, and stareyou-square-in-the-eyes lyrics.

Glory and Pennsylvania’s own The Wonder Years, Young at Heart isn’t doing anything that hasn’t been done before. But it is doing it about as deftly as it can be done and with a sincerity that is undeniable. If this “Heart” can keep that blood pumping, in time, one can easily envision the band following in the footsteps of The Menzingers, Tigers Jaws (R.I.P.), or Captain, We’re Sinking to become one of NEPA’s ﬂagship acts. With their emotive lyricism and catchy-as-acold hooks, the only thing holding them back is themselves. Here’s hoping it’s not another four years

In “Man,” a steady jolt of electric guitar zaps through the driving melody while Case’s bold lyrics play with gender roles: “And if I’m dipshit drunk on the pink perfume / I am the man in the f—king moon / ‘Cause you didn’t know what a man was / Until I showed you.” “Calling Cards,” a love song with onthe-road realism, whispers of an earlier Case ballad, “Knock Loud,” off 2001’s “Canadian Amp.” Spurts of baritone sax and flute mix with the whining of pedal steel in “Bracing for Sunday.” “Where Did I Leave That Fire” dips into the ephemeral with a minute of tonesetting sonar samples before exploring the vast within the mundane through Case’s dynamic vocals and a tempest of instrumentation, including vibes, thundering drums, banjo, and electric guitar that winds like an eel pulsing a trail of feedback. She also collaborated with some of her fellow New Pornographers, along with M. Ward and several members of My Morning Jacket. “The Worse Things Get…” isn’t Case’s mainstream breakout album. She’s been releasing solo albums for over a decade, mostly through her latest LP’s label ANTI-Records. “The Worse Things Get…” wows like a rough-cut gem mined by a pro and pried from the matrix of a fouryear hiatus after her Grammy-nominated “Middle Cyclone.” Don’t be surprised if this album gets a few Grammy nods, too. -Kait Burrier, Weekender Correspondent

WWWV

Jimmy Buffett ‘Songs from St. Somewhere’

Rating: WW

Buffet seems like he’s ‘Somewhere’ else On Jimmy Buffett’s ﬁrst album in four years, the mayor of Margaritaville returns to mixing softly swaying beach tunes with pirate tales of foreign intrigue and social

Top 8 at 8 with Ralphie Aversa 8. Katy Perry: ‘Roar’ 7. Avicii: ‘Wake Me Up’ 6. Robin Thicke/Pharrell Williams/T.I.: ‘Blurred Lines’ 5. Lady Gaga: ‘Applause’ 4. Zedd/Foxes-ClarityMaroon 5:

Young at Heart ‘Young at Heart’

Rating:

‘Love Somebody’ 3. Capital Cities: ‘Safe and Sound’ 2. Calvin Harris/Ellie Goulding: ‘I Need Your Love’ 1. Macklemore/Ryan Lewis/Mary Lambert: ‘Same Love’

commentary. The problem, however, is Buffett’s voice doesn’t sound nearly as engaged as his imaginative songwriting and a few turns with inspired guests. The 66-year-old veteran sounds bored on the island songs, snapping off each word with a clipped tone and a bland sense of phrasing – an aboutface from the performances that made Buffett such an enjoyable performer in the past. He sounds livelier on a series of ambitious songs about the mysterious adventures of a world traveler, but the tunes lack the hooks that made Buffett’s famous songs of long ago so memorable. There are positive exceptions, especially when guests Mark Knopﬂer (on “Oldest Surfer on the Beach”) and Latin singer Fanny Lu (on a Spanish version of “I Want to Go Back to Cartagena”) stir up the proceedings. Best of all is a duet with country star Toby Keith. “Too Drunk to Karaoke” bobs along with common-man humor and vivid writing and performing. It’s the one song from the new album sure to become a favorite during Buffett’s ever-popular live shows. -Michael McCall, Associated Press

Top 10 Albums at Gallery of Sound 1. Arctic Monkey: ‘AM’ 2. Avenged Sevenfold: ‘Hail To The King’ 3. Nine Inch Nails: ‘Hesitation Marks’ 4. 2 Chainz: ‘B.O.A.T.S. II #Metime’ 5. Five Finger Death Punch: ‘Wrong

Side Of Heaven & Righteous Side Of Hell V.1’ 6. Keith Urban: ‘Fuse’ 7. Robin Thicke: ‘Blurred Lines’ 8. Luke BryanL: ‘Crash My Party’ 9. Clash: ‘Hits Back’ 10. Sheryl Crow: ‘Feels Like Home’

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WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 18

Courtesy photo

‘A remarkable pairing’of performances Sara Pokorny

Weekender staff Writer

The show, a coupling of performance arts one would rarely think to put together, is so astounding that the people in it can still hardly believe it happens and that they are, in fact, a part of it. “It’s ridiculous,” said Christopher Walls, a man who has studied music since the age of 12 and has found himself putting his talents and musical passion to good use as music director of Cirque Musica, an over-thetop spectacle that will take over the Mohegan Sun Arena at Casey Plaza Sept. 22. “It’s a mash-up between a circus and a symphony orchestra; that’s the best way I can describe it,” Walls said with a laugh. “It’s two things you never thought would be put together, put together. It’s a remarkable pairing.” The show features the “clown of clowns” David Larible, who has headlined circus in arenas and theaters across Europe and is making his return to the United States where he previously was the headliner for Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey. The show will also feature the world famous Wallenda Highwire Duo, the thrilling España Family, and a cast of world-renowned performers. Cirque Musica is produced by Stephen Cook and TCG Productions out of Dallas, Texas. Walls was asked to preview the stage version of the show in November, and he said it has been “a roller coaster ride ever since.” The show was put together in an arena for the ﬁrst time in June of this year.

“It’s blown everyone away,” he said. “The audiences love it, the circus performers love it, the musicians love it – we all love it.” While the visuals are certainly stunning, it’s the large span of musical genres that back the show up that keep it interesting, and accessible, to all. “One of beautiful things is that we have music that appeals to everyone: Led Zeppelin’s ‘Kashmir’ to [David Guetta and Sia’s] ‘Titanium’ are arranged right now,” Walls said. “There’s Beatles stuff in the show, Beethoven’s Fifth, Tchaikovsky’s violin concerto. Actually, a violinist plays that from memory beautifully and actually performs an act while she’s doing it. It’s ridiculous.” While it may be easy to see how kids coming to enjoy the show could latch on to the newer music pieces, some may be left to wonder how such classical pieces are accessible to young ones, or those who simply have no interest in that genre of music. “I grew up with Tom and Jerry, Bugs Bunny, all of that music, and none of it was written for Tom and Jerry or Bugs Bunny,” Walls said. “That’s all classical, and we’re making that music accessible the same way those people did.” A local orchestra is invited to play at every show. The Northeast Pennsylvania Philharmonic will be a part of the arena show. “We built it in a way where it’s not very difﬁcult for the local orchestra,” he said. “The

hardest part is meeting a new symphony in every town. In every venue, we meet a new orchestra that has to learn the show quickly. Most musicians are very much alike and have the music worked out before I show up.” Though there are some hang-ups when it comes to dealing with new musicians at every arena. “Getting them to pay attention!” Walls said with a laugh. “It’s easy for me because my back is to the audience and to the acts; I’m the only one that doesn’t get to see the show. But then you have a ﬂute player up there that, like the audience, has never seen the show, so she’s trying to watch the performance, her music, and me at same time. It’s almost like the local musicians are performing their own circus acts.” W

Cirque musica: sept. 22, 7 p.m., mohegan sun arena at Casey plaza (255 Highland park blvd., Wilkes-barre). $25, $32.50, $49.50, $65.

Shake your groove thing with Dancin’ Machine, who will play at the Mauch Chunk Opera House (14 W. Broadway, Jim Thorpe) on Sept. 20 at 8:30 p.m. Tickets are $20. For more info or tickets call 570.325.0249 or visit mauchchunkoperahouse.com. Horizon Wireless: Oct. 5, 10 p.m. $8/$10. • Start Making Sense,Tribute to Talking Heads: Oct. 18, 10 p.m. $10/$15. • Alexis P. Suter Band: Nov. 2, 9 p.m .$10/$15. • Dead on Live“Europe 72”: Nov. 8, 10 p.m. $8/$12. • Marco Bennevento: Nov. 15, 10 p.m. $15/$20. • Zach Deputy: Nov. 22, 10 p.m. $10/$15. • Brothers Past: Nov. 27, 10 p.m. $12/$15. SCRANTON CULTURAL CENTER (420 n.Washington ave., scranton) 888.669.8966, scrantonculturalcenter.org • Up & Coming Comdey Series: sept. 28, 8 p.m., $16. SHERMAN THEATER (524 Main St., Stroudsburg) 570.420.2808, shermantheater. com • moe./Sister Sparrow and the Dirty Birds: Sept. 29, 7 p.m., $28. • SOJA: Oct. 10, 8 p.m., $17.50$20. • Taking Back Sunday/Polar Bear Club/Transit: Oct. 14, 8 p.m., $25-$28. • Conspirator: Oct. 19, 9 p.m., $17-$20. • Umphrey’s McGee/The London Soul: Oct. 24, 8 p.m., $25-$30. • The Misfits/The Attack/Take Away The Ugly/The Big Empty/ Badtown Rude/The Curse of Sorrow: Oct. 25, 7 p.m., $16-$18. • In This Moment/Motionless In White/Kyng/All Hail The Yeti: Nov. 8, 7 p.m., $20-$22. • Jake Miller: Nov. 19, 8 p.m., $20-$22. PHILADELPHIA ELECTRIC FACTORY (3421 Willow St., Philadelphia) 215.LOVE.222, electricfactory.info • City and Colour: Sept. 18, 8 p.m. • Michael Franti and Spearhead:

Sept. 21, 8:30 p.m. • Neko Case: Sept. 25, 8:30 p.m. • Korn: Sept. 26, 8:30 p.m. • Local Natives/Wild Nothing: Sept. 28, 8:30 p.m. • The Waterboys/Freddie Stevenson: Sept. 29, 8:30 p.m. • Zeds Dead/Paper Diamond/ Green Lantern/Branchez: Oct. 3, 8:30 p.m. • Moe./Sister Sparrow * The Dirty Birds: Oct. 4, 8:30 p.m. • Digitour: Oct. 5, 8:30 p.m. • The Naked and Famous/The Colourist: Oct. 8, 8 p.m. • Sara Bareilles: Oct. 10, 8:30 p.m. • Timeflies/Chiddy Bang: Oct. 11, 8:30 p.m. • Janelle Monae: Oct. 13, 8 p.m. • Mayday Parade/Man Overboard/Cartel/Stages & Stereos: Oct. 18, 7 p.m. • Rusko: Oct. 19, 8:30 p.m. • Austin Mahone/Becky G/ Midnight Red/W3 The Future: Oct. 25, 7:30 p.m. • Minus the Bear/INVSN/Slow Bird: Oct. 26, 8:30 p.m. • Frightened Rabbit/Augustines: Oct. 27, 8 p.m. • We Came As Romans/ Silverstein/Chunk! No, Captain Chunk!/The Color Morale/ Dangerkids: Oct. 30, 7 p.m. • Infected Mushroom/Zomboy: Oct. 31, 8:30 p.m. • Fitz and the Tantrums/Captial Cities/Beat Club: Nov. 1, 8:30 p.m. • Matt Nathanson/Joshua Radin: nov. 2, 8 p.m. • Sleeping with Sirens/Memphis May Fire/Breathe Carolina/ Issues: Nov. 4, 7 p.m. • Alkaline Trio/Newfound Glory: nov. 13, 8 p.m. • Hoodie Allen/OCD: Moosh & Twist/Mod Sun/D-Why: Nov. 23, 8:30 p.m. • Lamb of God & Killswitch Engage/Testament/Huntress: nov. 24, 7 p.m. • Frank Turner & The Sleeping

717.534.3911, giantcenter.com • Selena Gomez: Oct. 22, 7 p.m. • The Fresh Beat Band: Dec. 4, 7 p.m. SANDS BETHLEHEM EVENT CENTER (77 Sands Blvd., Bethlehem) 610.2977414, sandseventcenter. com • Sarah Brightman: Sept. 22, 8 p.m. • Steely Dan: Sep. 27, 7 p.m. • Celtic Thunder: Oct. 9, 8 p.m. • Diana Krall: Oct. 10, 8 p.m. • A Day To Remember/Pierce the Veil/All Time Low: Oct. 12, 6:45 p.m. • Barenaked Ladies: Oct. 18, 8 p.m. WHITAKER CENTER (222 Market St., Harrisburg) 717.214.ARTS, whitakercenter.org • Ana Popovic: Sept. 19, 8 p.m. • Bo Bice: Oct. 10, 7:30 p.m. NEW YORK / NEW JERSEY BEACON THEATRE (2124 Broadway, New York, N.Y.) 212.465.6500, beacontheatre. com • Tedeschi Trucks Band: Sept. 20-21, TIMES VARY • Joe Satriani: Sept. 26, 8 p.m. • An Evening with Ian Anderson: Oct. 11, 8 p.m. • The Fab Faux: Oct. 26, 8 p.m. • Zappa Plays Zappa: Oct. 31, 8 p.m. IRVING PLAZA (17 Irving Place, New York, N.Y.) 212.777.6800, irvingplaza.com • Hinder and Candlebox: Sept. 26, 7 p.m. • Streetlight Manifesto: Oct. 1, 7 p.m. • Marky Ramone’s Blitzkrieg w/ Andrew W.K. on vocals: Oct. 3, 7 p.m. • 3oh!3/The Summer Set: Oct. 21, 6 p.m. IZOD CENTER (50 State Rt. 120, East Rutherford, N.J.) 201.935.3900, meadowlands.com • Justin Timberlake: Nov. 9, 8 p.m. MADISON SQUARE GARDEN (7th Ave., New York, N.Y.) 212.465.6741, thegarden.com • Ed Sheeran: Oct. 29, 8 p.m. Nov. 1, 8 p.m. • Paramore: Nov. 13, 7:30 p.m. • Rod Stewart: Dec. 9, 8 p.m. RADIO CITY MUSIC HALL (1260 6th Ave., New York, N.Y.) 212.247.4777, radiocity.com • Sarah Brightman: Sep. 21, 8 p.m. • Neko Case: Sept. 26, 8 p.m. • Sara Bareilles: Oct. 9, 8 p.m. • Rodriguez: Oct. 10, 8 p.m. • Tony Bennett: Oct. 11, 8 p.m. ROSELAND BALLROOM (239 52nd Street, New York, N.Y.) 212.247.0200, roselandballroom. com • Korn/Asking Alexandria/Love & Death: Sept. 27, 8 p.m. • Blondie: Oct. 4, 8 p.m. • The Band Perry: Oct. 16, 8 p.m. BORGATA HOTEL CASINO & SPA (1 Borgata Way, Atlantic City, N.J.) 609.317.1000, theborgata.com • Jerry Lewis: Sept. 20, 8 p.m.

Expanded listings theweekender.com.

at W

Page 19

$30-$45. • Ru Paul’s Drag Race Show: Oct. 26, 8 p.m., $15. • Aaron Lewis: Nov. 16, 8 p.m., $45-$65. • Scott Weiland & The Wildabouts: nov. 30, 8 p.m., $45-$65. • Jeff Ross: Dec. 7, 8 p.m., $35-$50. PENN’S PEAK (325 Maury Rd.,Jim Thorpe) 866.605.7325, pennspeak.com • Josh Turner: Sept. 26, 8 p.m. • Nitty Gritty Dirt Band: Sept. 27, 8 p.m. • Hinder & Candlebox with Devour The Day and Open Air Stereo: Sept. 29, 7 p.m. • The Swing Dolls: Tribute to Andrews Sisters and McGuire Sisters: Oct. 1-3, 1 p.m. • Chris Cagle: Oct. 4, 8 p.m. • Melvin Seals & JGB: Oct. 10, 8 p.m. • King Henry and the Showmen: Oct. 15-17, 1 p.m. • Back to the Eighties Show with Jessie’s Girl: Oct. 18, 9 p.m. • Real Diamond: Neil Diamond Tribute: Oct. 23-24, 1 p.m.; Oct. 25, 8 p.m. • Gordon Lightfoot: Oct. 26, 8 p.m. • America: Nov. 2, 8 p.m. • Get the Led Out: Nov. 9, 8 p.m. • 38 Special: Nov. 16, 8 p.m. • Dark Star Orchestra: Nov. 27, 8 p.m. • Rhonda Vincent and The Rage: march 22, 8 p.m. RIVER STREET JAZZ CAFE (667 n. river st., Plains) 570.822.2992, riverstreetjazzcafe. com5 • Tribute to Prince (Spady’s All-Star Band): Sept. 21, 10 p.m. $10/$15. • Pigeons Play Ping Pong: Sept. 26, 10 p.m. $5/$8. • Wham Bam Bowie Band,Tribute to David Bowie: Sept. 28, 10 p.m. $8/$10. • Joe Louis Walker: Oct. 4, 9 p.m. $10/$15. • The Manhattan Project with

Souls/The Smith Street Band/ Koo Koo Kanga Roo: Nov. 29, 8 p.m. • Running of the Santas Mega Festival: Dec. 7, noon. • Dark Star Orchestra: Dec. 29, 8:30 p.m. THE FILLMORE AT THE TLA (334 South St., Philadelphia) 215.922.1011, tlaphilly.com • Stereophonics: Sept. 19, 8 p.m. • Icona Pop: Sept. 22, 8 p.m. KESWICK THEATRE (291 North Keswick Ave., Glenside) 215.572.7650, keswicktheatre.com • Steve Hackett: Genesis Revisited: Oct. 11-12, 8 p.m. • The Piano Guys: Oct. 18, 8 p.m. • The Fab Faux: Oct. 19, 8 p.m. • Steven Wright: Nov. 3, 8 p.m. NORTH STAR BAR 27th & Poplar St., Philadelphia 215.684.0808 • Oct. 2: Calabrese • Oct. 3: The Toasters/Voodoo Glow Skulls • Oct. 5: Mephiskapheles/ Inspector 7, Post Sun Times TROCADERO THEATRE (1003 Arch St., Philadelphia) 215.336.2000, thetroc.com • FLAG/TSOL/Cerebral Ballzy: sept. 18, 8 p.m. • The Selector: Sept. 19, 8 p.m. • The Chariot: Oct. 17, 6:30 p.m. • Stephen “Ragga” Marley: Oct. 25, 7 p.m. • Less Than Jake/Anti-Flag/ Masked Intruder/Get Dead: Nov. 8, 7:30 p.m. SUSQUEHANNA BANK CENTER (1 Harbour Blvd., Camden, N.J.) 609.365.1300, livenation.com/ venues/14115 • Thirty Seconds to Mars: Sept. 29, 7:30 p.m. • The Weekend: Oct. 4, 8 p.m. • Pretty Lights: Nov. 1, 8 p.m. • Paramore: Nov. 8, 7 p.m. • Slayer: Nov. 29, 7:30 p.m. WELLS FARGO CENTER (3601 South Broad St., Philadelphia) 215.336.3600, wellsfargocenterphilly.com • Michael Buble: Sept. 21, 8 p.m. • Selena Gomez: Oct. 18, 8 p.m. • Drake: Oct. 19, 7 p.m. • Pearl Jam: Oct. 21, 7:30 p.m. • Josh Groban: Nov. 3, 7:30 p.m. • Justin Timberlake: Nov. 10, 8 p.m. • P!nk: Dec. 6, 8 p.m. • Rod Stewart: Dec. 11, 8 p.m. ELSEWHERE IN PA BRYCE JORDAN CENTER (127 University Dr., State College) 814.865.5500, bjc.psu.edu • OneRepublic: Oct. 3 • B.B. King: Oct. 13, 7:30 p.m. • nine inch nails: Oct. 19, 8 p.m. • Macklemore & Ryan Lewis: Nov. 7, 7:30 p.m. CROCODILE ROCK (520 West Hamilton st, allentown) 610.434.460, crocodilerockcafe. com • Great White: Sep. 18, 7 p.m. • Hollywood Ending: Sept. 20, 5:30 p.m. • A Skylit Drive: Oct. 4, 5 p.m. • Teddy Geiger: Oct. 16, 5:30 p.m. • The Word Alive: Nov. 16, 5 p.m. GIANT CENTER (950 Hersheypark Dr., Hershey)

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

ALICE C. WILTSIE PERFORMING ARTS CENTER (700 n.Wyoming st., Hazleton) 570.861.0510, wiltsiecenter.org • Big Bad Voodoo Daddy: Oct. 18, 8 p.m. THE COOPERAGE PROJECT (1030 Main St., Honesdale) 570.253.2020, thecooperageproject.org • Claudia Nygaard: Sept. 21, 8 p.m., $15-$18. • Mudras: Sept. 27, 7:30 p.m. (Donations accepted and appreciated at the door at all events.) F.M. KIRBY CENTER (71 Public Square,Wilkes-Barre) 570.826.1100, kirbycenter.org • Alice Cooper: Oct. 18, 8 p.m. $39, $49, $59, $75 (limited pit seating). • Ghost Hunters Live: Oct. 23, 7:30 p.m., $25-$60. • Jeff Ross: Oct. 25, 8 p.m., $35$75. • Merle Haggard: Nov. 2, 8 p.m. $40-$99. • YAMATO: The Drummers of Japan: Nov. 20, 7:30 p.m. $25-$35. • Elvis Costello: Nov. 25, 7:30 p.m., $59-$95. • Kenny Rogers: Nov. 29, 7:30 p.m., $50-$75. HAWLEY SILK MILL (8 Silk Mill Dr., Hawley. 570.588.8077, silkmillharmony. com) • New England Performer of the Year: Sarah Blacker: Sept. 21, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $16, advance; $20, at the door. • Blues & Folk Artists: Rebecca Pronsky: Sept. 28, 7:30-9:30 p.m. $16, advance; $20, door. MAUCH CHUNK OPERA HOUSE (14 W. Broadway,Jim Thorpe) 570.325.0249, mauchchunkoperahouse.com • Dancin’Machine: Sept. 20, 8:30 p.m. $20. • Splintered Sunlight: Sept. 21, 8 p.m. $15. • Jimmy Thackery and the Drivers: sept. 26, 8 p.m., $20. • Bill Kirchen and Texicali: Sept. 27, 8:30 p.m. $23. • Soft Parade: Sept. 28, 8 p.m. $23. • Simon & Garfunkel Retrospective: Oct. 4, 8:30 p.m., $25. • Jeffery Gaines Band: Oct. 5, 8 p.m., $23. • Swearingen & Kelli: Oct. 6, 6 p.m., $15. • The Steepwater Band: Oct. 10, 8:30 p.m., $15. MEETING OF THE MINDS VI • Sept. 27-29, Meshoppen, featuring Tea Leaf Green, Orgone, Cabinet,The Heavy Pets, Flux Capacitor, more. $65, presale; $90, day of show. Info: jibberjazz.com. MOHEGAN SUN ARENA (255 Highland Park Blvd.,Wilkesbarre) 800.745.3000, mohegansunarenapa.com • Cirque Musica: Sept. 22, 7 p.m. $25-$65. MOUNT AIRY CASINO RESORT (44 Woodland Rd., Mount Pocono) 877.682.4791, mountairycasino. com • Amy Schumer: Oct. 5, 8 p.m., $35-$50. • The Stylistics: Oct. 19, 8 p.m.,

WEEKENDER, WEDNESDAY,SEPTEMBER18,201

Melissa Hughes | Weekender Correspondent

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ally saying “remember that time we…” so often, none of those stories are followed up by “…sat at a table and made fun of the girl wearing shoes she couldn’t walk in, singing songs with notes she couldn’t hit, or throwing darts so bad she missed the board completely.” Maybe it’s because I am that girl. I laugh at the fact that the last time I played pool, the cue ball ﬂew across the room while the balls on the table remained in their pretty triangular formation. That same night, I danced at a dive bar with an old man who smelled like moth balls. I lived and I live to laugh at myself. So this one is dedicated to you, the girls who dance like Elaine from “Seinfeld,” the girls who sing the Spice Girls, the girls who laugh at themselves and unapologetically play New Kids on the Block on the jukebox and the girls who stuff their faces with Taco Bell at 1 a.m. while they speed down Wyoming Avenue. Life is much too short to spend it undead. Zombie movies are great, but living life with a pulse and a purpose is the stuff that makes the ride worthwhile. W

Sunday,15th September 1:00pm 22 September Panthers vs. Bills Browns vs. Ravens Vikings vs. Bears Cowboys vs. Chiefs Redskins vs. Packers Titans vs. Texans Dolphins vs. Colts Chargers vs. Eagles

Watch All 4:05pm King’s Deck LionsThe vs. Cardinals Wed. Sun.Sept. Sept.18th 15 Saints vs. Buccaneers Games Pair of Nuts (on deck) Live Music 4:25pm Thurs. Sept. 19th vs. Giants 8-11pm Broncos Here! Jaguars vs. Raiders Domestic Drafts

The zombie phenomenon has overtaken today’s society. Whether it’s “The Walking Dead” on AMC, any George Romero movie fest, zombie pub crawls, zombie parties, or zombie hunters, we as a society have become obsessed with the undead subculture. Imagine for a moment that it was a possibility. Not so much that you were buried and came back a gruesome, brain-craving man-eater, but that you went through life without living. I see it all the time: girls not dancing to the music, not singing cheesy karaoke songs, and not having fun. They are out to be the “cool crew” that sits at tables and makes fun of other girls. They laugh at the ones with the guts to go dance. What they don’t realize, and I personally didn’t learn until my later 20s, is that you remember the nights you danced. You laugh the next day, and sometimes years later, at the songs you sang out of tune with 10 other friends on stage. You make the most memories when you allow yourself to live. Sitting at a table being a mean girl all night sounds about as fun as getting ﬁngered on wing night. I catch myself person-

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Kacy Muir | Weekender Correspondent

‘Love’in the time of‘Karaoke’

‘Turn Around Bright Eyes: The Rituals of Love and Karaoke’ By Rob Sheffield Rating: W W W W W

memoirs, Sheffield’s writing style remains constant — conversational, witty and upfront. In addition, the book is heaving with sentiment, humor and cheer. Even after the loss of his first wife, Sheffield emphasizes that happiness is all around us, even at a karaoke bar. In fact, it was music that led Sheffield to believe in love again, demonstrating that music has the power to bring people together. Interestingly enough,

“Turn Around Bright Eyes” opens with an epigraph from Sonic Youth’s song, “Eric’s Trip:” “We make up what we can’t hear. Then we sing all night.” Without a doubt, Shefﬁeld keeps singing as each chapter speeds forward in succinct order. The last chapter comes all too soon but, luckily, we can read it again knowing that Shefﬁeld is still out there, mic in hand, conquering love in the time of karaoke. W

BOOKS RELEASED THE WEEK OF SEPT. 23:

• ‘Doctor Sleep’ by Stephen King • ‘Killing Jesus: A History’ by Bill O’Reilly • ‘Deadline’ by Sandra Brown • ‘The Night is Forever’ by Heather Graham • ‘The Lowland’ by Jhumpa Lahiri

Ciocca Prints/Yanashot Sculpture, featuring works by Mark Ciocca and Denis Yanashot: Through Oct. 4. Opening reception sept. 8, 1-3 p.m. Marquis Art & Frame (122 s. main st., Wilkes-barre, 570.823.0518) gallery hours mon.-sat., 11 a.m.-5 p.m. •“Kindred Spirits: The Art of Ellen Jamiolkowski and Judith Lynn Keats”: Sept. 20-Nov. 2. Opening reception Sept. 20, 5-8 p.m. Misericordia University (301 Lake st., dallas, 570.674.6286) Pauly Friedman art gallery,tues.-thurs., 10 a.m.-8 p.m.; Fri., 10 a.m.-5p.m.; sat.sun., 1-5 p.m. •“Capturing Realism 2013”: Through Oct. 31. Pauly Friedman Art Gallery (Misericordia University, 570.674.6250, misericordia.edu/art) gallery Hours: mon. closed,tue.-thurs. 10 a.m.-8 p.m., Fri. 10 a.m.-5 p.m., sat.sun. 1-5 p.m. •“Capturing Realism 2013”, a biennial exhibit of works instructors, alumni and apprentices from the nationally renowned studios of the ani art academies and acclaimed modern master Anthony J.Waichulis: Sept. 7-Oct. 31. Opening reception Sept. 7, 5-8 p.m. Pocono Arts Council (18 N. Seventh St., Stroudsburg. 570.476.4460. www.poconoarts.org) • September artists show: Opening reception sept. 7, 1-4 p.m. runs through sept. 30. Sordoni Art Gallery (150 s. river st.,Wilkes-barre, 570.408.4325) gallery hours: tues.-sun., noon-4:30 p.m. •“The Art of Ballet”: Through Oct. 20. Opening reception Sept. 6, 5-7 p.m. Schulman Gallery (2nd floor of LCCC Campus Center, 1333 s. Prospect st., nanticoke, www.luzerne. edu/schulmangallery, 570.740.0727) gallery hours: mon.-Fri., 9 a.m.-5 p.m. • Phone-tography, featuring art captured by cell phone photos: Through Sept. 5. • Crayons and Care II, artwork by children of the Litewska Hospital in Warsaw, Poland: Sept. 13-Oct. 7. • Old Masters: Oct. 25-Nov. 28. • Annual Faculty/Alumni Exhibit: Dec. 6- Jan. 2 Something Special (23 W.Walnut st., Kingston, 570.288.8386) Open Mon.-Fri., 7:30 a.m.-4 p.m., Sat., 7:30 a.m.-2 p.m. •“Quilt On”, work by Sabine Thomas: Runs through Oct. 4. Verve Vertu Art Studio (Misericordia University, 570.674.6250, misericordia.edu/art) Exhibit: Through April 2014. Widmann Gallery (Located in King’s College’s SheehyFarmer Campus Center between North Franklin and north main streets,WilkesBarre, 570.208.5900, ext. 5328) gallery hours: mon. through Fri. 9 a.m. to 4:30 p.m., sat. and sun. as arranged. Free and open to the public. •“Latina”exhibition, photographs by Jose Galvez: Sept. 8-14. Public lecture by Galvez Sept. 11, 7 p.m., Burke auditorium. Sept. 20- Oct. 25 • The Eleventh Invitational Emerging Artists Exhibition: Sept. 20-Oct. 25. Meet the artist reception sept. 20, 6-8 p.m. The Wyoming Valley Art League (47 n. Franklin st.,Wilkes-barre, www. wval.org, 570.288.1020) • 3rd Friday Art Walk: Sept. 20, 5-8 p.m., 130 s. Franklin st.

Expanded listings at theweekender.com.

Send your listings to WBWnews@civitasmedia.com, 90 E. Market St., Wilkes-Barre, Pa., 18703, or fax to 570.831.7375. Deadline is Mondays at 2 p.m. Print listings occur up until three weeks from publication date.

Page 21

Holding the microphone, he stares into the small blue screen as he prepares himself for those scrolling white words. He is ready to sing love to the audience and make them swoon in less than three minutes. This is author, editor and music journalist, Rob Sheffield, back in action with his latest work, “Turn Around Bright Eyes: The Rituals of Love and Karaoke.” Sheffield, who has authored two previous memoirs, “Love is a Mix Tape” and “Talking to Girls About Duran Duran,” is perhaps one of the best contemporary music memoirists. After decades of thrilling readers with his pop culture expertise, Sheffield begins his new venture with a love story, appropriately titled, “Total Eclipse of the Heart:” “Tonight we are setting out to belt some of our favorite songs. We’ll do songs we’ve never tried before. We’ll take on duets we haven’t sung together. And we’ll do the standards we always have to do. But when you take that karaoke microphone in your hand, you don’t know what kind of adventure you’re stepping into. So you just have to surrender and let the song take over. […] If you’re lucky, and the beer doesn’t run out, it’s more than just a night of debauchery. It’s a spiritual quest.” The following chapters share a commonality — all of them titled after a popular karaoke song. As each chapter unfolds, readers follow Sheffield down karaoke lane, beginning with such artists as Bonnie Tyler and Merle Haggard, only to conclude with David Bowie and Nirvana. While weaving his personal experiences throughout, Sheffield’s vast knowledge as a music journalist adds further layers to the work. Similar to his earlier

Oldenburg and Earl Lehman: Sept. 5-28. •“Gates to Infinity”: Sept. 5-28. • Choose Freedom, drop-in meditation classes: through sept. 19, 7-8:30 p.m. $10 per class. •“This Show Is For The Birds”: Oct. 4-29. B & B Art Gallery (222 Northern Blvd., S.Abington township) • Third Friday Exhibit featuring Travis Prince: Through September. The Butternut Gallery & Second Story Books (204 Church st, montrose, 570.278.4011, butternutgallery.com). Gallery hours: Wed.-sat., 11a.m.-5 p.m., sun., 12 p.m.-4 p.m. •“Paintings, Potter, Life: Work of Bob Smith & Cary Joseph:”Through Sept. 8. • Third annual Fiber Arts exhibit: Sept. 11-Oct. 6. Opening reception Sept. 14, 3-5 p.m. Center Street Café and Gallery (225 Center St. Bloomsburg. 570.204.7847) gallery Hours: tuesday-thursday, 9 a.m.4 p.m.; Friday, 9 a.m.-8 p.m.; saturday, 10 a.m.-2 p.m.) • Anthony Ferro /New Works 2013/ Oil Pastel on Paper: Oct. 1-26. Opening reception Oct. 5, 3-6 p.m. Converge Gallery (140 W. Fourth st.,Williamsport, 570.435.7080, convergegallery.com) • Beyond The Surface: Sept. 5, Oct. 31. Opening reception and artist talk by Jason Bryant Sept. 5, 6-9 p.m. Dietrich Theatre (downtown tunkhannock, 570.996.1500) • Airing of the Quilts – Civil War Era Quilting: Oct. 1-Nov. 15. Everhart Museum (1901 Mulberry St., Scranton, PA, 570.346.7186, www.everhart-museum. org) Admission $5 adults; $3 students/ seniors; $2 children 6-12; members free. • Sidewalk Surfing: The Art & Culture of Skateboarding: Through Dec. 30. Exhibit of Diane Grant Czajkowski, “Nature and Pet Portraits”: Sept. 12-25, Citizens Bank (Kingston Corners, 196 S.Wyoming Ave, Kingston). Open during bank hours: Monday through thursday, 9 a.m.-5 p.m.; Friday, 9 a.m.- 6 p.m. Hazleton Art League (225 e. broad st., Hazleton, hazletonartleague.org) • DylanFest: Seot. 22, 1 p.m. Hope Horn Gallery (Hyland Hall, University of Scranton, 570.941.4214) gallery Hours: sun.-Fri., noon-4 p.m.; Wed., 6-8 p.m. •“Depths and Edges: Berenice D’Vorzon”: Sept. 6-Oct. 11. • Exhibit Lecture:“Where Elements meet: the Life and Work of berenice D’Vorzon”by Darlene Miller-Lanning, Ph.d.: sept. 6. the lamp post . chapter one (47 north Franklin st., third floor,Wilkesbarre.) • Creation Destruction Potential, a collection of visual, theatrical, and musical art & performance: Sept. 4, 8 p.m. $5. The Linder Gallery at Keystone College (570.945.8335, keystone.edu/ lindergallery) •“James Harmon: Planned Random Occurrence”: Sept. 21-Oct. 22. Opening reception sept. 22, 4-6 p.m.artist talk sept. 23, 9:45 a.m., brooks theater. Madelon Powers Gallery at East Stroudsburg University (gallery hours: 11 a.m. to 7 p.m.tuesday and Wednesday, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. monday,thursday and Friday) •

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

Book reviews and literary insight

POETIC Forty Fort Meeting House (across from the Forty Fort borough building on river st. Forty Fort) Lecture series •“Early Travelers,Traders, & Residents of Wyoming Valley”with Clark switzer: sept. 15, 3:30 p.m. •“Wyoming Valley’s First Jews: The german Connection”with dr. sheldon spear: sept. 22, 3:30 p.m. • Vesper Service with Rabbi Kaplan of temple Israel: sept. 29, 5 p.m. Friends of the Scranton Public Library (520 Vine st., scranton, 570.348.3000) • Used Book Sale at Library Express in the mall at steamtown: sept. 17-22. King’s College (133 north river st.,Wilkes-barre, 570.208.5957 or kings.edu) • Campion Literary Society Writing Workshops: sept. 17, 4 p.m., sheehyFarmer Campus Center. • Campion Literary Society Open readings: sept. 27, 4 p.m., gold room, administration building. • Gold Room,Administration Building; Oct. 30, 7 p.m., Gold Room, administration building. • Campion Literary Society Writing Workshops: Oct. 17, 4 p.m., SheehyFarmer Campus Center. • Reading by Amy Bloom: Oct. 22, 7:30 p.m., burke auditorium. The Osterhout Free Library (71 s. Franklin st.,Wilkes-barre, www. osterhout.info, 570.821.1959) • Socrates Café Discussion Group: Sept. 12, 6:30-8 p.m. • Knit & Crochet Group: Sept. 14, 28, 10:30 a.m.-noon. • Franklin St. Sleuths Book Discussion: Sept. 19, 6:30 p.m.“Murder in Little Italy,” by Victoria Thompson. • Personal Power Brown Bag Lunch: sept. 23, 12:15-1 p.m. • Personal Power Evening Program: sept. 23, 6-7:30 p.m. • Fall Gala: Oct. 4, 6-11 p.m., Westmoreland Club (59 S. Franklin St., Wilkes-barre). Pittston Memorial Library (47 broad st., 570.654.9565, pitmemlib@comcast.net) • Taste of Greater Pittston: Sept. 8, 2-5 p.m. $30. • Library expansion committee meeting: sept. 11, 6:30 p.m. • Teen Advisory Group (TAG) meeting: sept. 12, noon. • The Greater Pittston Charity Train Ride: Sept. 15, 9 a.m., to Jim Thorpe. $65. • Lego Club meeting: Sept. 16, 4 p.m. • Craft Club meeting: Sept. 16, 6 p.m. • Snacks and Stories storytime for kids of all ages: sept. 18, 4 p.m. • Science Club meeting: Sept. 19, 4 p.m. • Movie night: Sept. 26, 5:45 p.m. • Intro to Financial Aid and Scholarships Workshop: sept. 26, 6 p.m. Free for parents and students presented by nePa Career and College Counseling associates. no registration is required. Scranton StorySlam: Scranton StorySlam,Jessup: ATale of Two Cities: Sept. 14, 7 p.m., St. George’s Restaurant (304 Church St.,Jessup). University of Scranton • Book signing with award-winning book author Susan Campbell Bartoletti, Ph.D.: sept. 7, 4-5 p.m., denaples Center. West Pittston Library (200 Exeter Ave., www.wplibrary.org, 570.654.9847) • Book Club: First Tues., 6:45 p.m. Free. Informal discussion of member-selected books. • Weekly story time for children: Fri., 1 p.m. Free. VISUAL AFA Gallery (514 Lackawanna ave., scranton: 570.969.1040 or artistsforart.org) gallery hours thurs.-sat., 12-5 p.m. • Seventy Years of Painting, Carol

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 22

r e d n e k e v e i l e W Wednesday: 279 Bar & Grill: StingRay Blues Bart and Urby’s: Musician’s Showcase @9:30p Hops and Barley’s: Karaoke w/ DJ Bounce King’s, Mountain Top: Revolution 3 River Street Jazz Café: Open Mic @ 9pm

Thursday: 279 Bar & Grill: NFL – Free Jukebox Avanti: Party on the Patio w/ The Weekender 8-10p Bart and Urby’s: Trivia Night Breakers, Mohegan Sun: DJ Optimum @ 10 Brews Brothers, Luzerne: Larry George Chacko’s: Flaxy Morgan King’s, Mountain Top: Strawberry Jam Duo My Lower End: Tracey Dee/Cee River Street Jazz Café: Flux Capacitor Senunas’: DJ O’Shea Woodlands: Kiss Theater Fundraiser @ 6pm - Club HD inside Evolution Nightclub w/ DJ DATA. Streamside bandstand- DJ KEV - Hosted by 97 BHT Friday: 279 Bar & Grill: Hat Tryk Bart & Urby’s: Front room-Sledgehammer of Silence – on The Other side: Dirtwind Beaumont Inn Dallas: Matt Bennick Trio 8-11p Breakers, Mohegan Sun: Drop Dead Sexy @9:30 Brews Brothers, Luzerne: College Night w/ DJ Casey Brews Brothers, Pittston: Country Night Gone Wild Grotto, Harveys Lake: The Sperazza Band Grotto, Wyoming Valley Mall: John Lukas My Lower End: Free jukebox River Street Jazz Café: Subnotics Toots vs. Marley ft. members of Breaking Benjamin, Collective, The Woody Browns Project, George Wesley Band. Rox 52: DJ Big Rigg Woodlands: Evolution Nightclub – 5 Day Happy Hour w/ DJ SlM JMM Top 40 & Club Music w/ Host 98.5 KRZ’s Fishboy & Flaxy Morgan– Streamside/Exec

Saturday: 279 Bar & Grill: Jon & Kate Plus Fate Bart & Urby’s: The Otherside – The New Plush DJ Party Breakers, Mohegan Sun: Shorty Long @ 9:30 Brews Brothers, Luzerne: Dave Matthews Tribute w/ Doug & Sean Brews Brothers, Pittston: UFC 165 King’s, Mountain Top: Tyme Band My Lower End: Stealing Neil River Street Jazz Café: Tribute To Princew/ Clarence Spady All Star Band Senunas’: DJ Hersh & Space Walk Pub Crawl Woodlands: Evolution Nightclub - 98.5 KRZ Double Shot Weekend Your Bachelorette Party Headquarters DJ Davey B & DJ Kev the Rev Playing Top 40 & Club Music w/ Host “Fishboy” from 98.5 KRZ & Xcluzive Soul -Streamside/ Exec

Sunday: Beaumont Inn, Dallas: Big Daddy Dex 5-8p Brews Brothers, Luzerne: Rocking for Ronnie Williams Benefeit 4-2am ft. 4-4:45 Black Mountain Brews – 5-5:45 Iron Cowboy – 6-6:45 Russello Project – 7-7:45 M80 – 8-8:45 Stealing Neil – 9-9:45 40lb Head – 10-10:45 Bad Hair Day – 11-11:45 Gone Crazy – 12-12:45 Zamani – 1-1:45 Open Jam King’s, Mountain Top: NFL Ticket My Lower End: Mick Wildoner

Monday: 279 Bar & Grill: Dustin Switzer & Aaron Bruch My Lower End: Kamikaze Karaoke Tuesday: Hops & Barleys: Aaron Bruch Grotto, Harveys Lake: The Blend Jim McCarthy’s: Wanna B’s Karaoke Metro: Karaoke 8-12 My Lower End: Free Jukebox TommyBoys: Open Mic

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Page 23

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WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 24

Don’t join‘The Family’ PETE CROATTO

Weekender Correspondent

Rating: W W Agoodmovieistrappedinside “The Family,” French director LucBesson’s comedy-drama-confused hyphenate. Occasionally, theactorsbrieflyemergefromthe layersofshtickandcamptoreveal what we’re missing. Then Robert De Niro beats a plumber with a wrench and everyone is back behindbars. De Niro’s character, Giovanni Manzoni, was a big shot in the New York mob until he turned rat. Now, Giovanni and his family – renamed the Blakes – move through France under the watchful eye of Stansfield (Tommy Lee Jones), their Witness Protection Programsupervisor. Normandy is the latest fresh start. The kids, 14-year-old Warren(JohnD’Leo)and17-yearold Belle (a very non-paisana Dianna Agron), head to school, where they immediately wreak their special brand of havoc. Wife Maggie (Michelle Pfeiffer) can’t find her place, whether it’s at the grocery store (which she torches after the cashier insults her) or church. Giovanni putters around the house, discovers a typewriter, and starts banging out his memoirs. Writing only occupies some of histime.Soon,Giovanniisresolving the ancient house’s brown water issue…mob-style. Besson also can’t find his focus, so “The Family” feels incomplete and, worse, inattentive. Sometimes it’s about adjusting to the sleepy charms of small-town France. Every once in a while, you’re led to believe it’s about living life under constant surveillance, which is great because Jones’ laconic charm and De Niro’s brusquecoolbattleitout. And won’t someone please think of the children? Warren makes allies through graft and corruption; Belle, who is as consistent as March weather, takes time out from pummeling handsy suitors to seduce (and fall in love with) her math tutor, a creepyarrangementthatisplayed straight. Besson’s inability to corral these elements into anything cohesively entertaining is stunning; “The Family” is so fragmented that its script is probably in Morse code. At least twice he blowssurefirepunchlines,includ-

‘The Family’ replays the same old mob jokes over and over again, never amounting to much despite help from big names like Robert De Niro and Tommy Lee Jones.

OPENiNg iN ThEATERs This wEEk: • Prisoners • Battle of the Year • Generation Iron • Thanks for Sharing DVDs released Sept. 17: • World War Z • The Bling Ring • Augustine • Drift • The East ing Maggie’s visit to confessional. We don’t see the visit, but we see the priest’s reaction – which occurssolongafterthesetupthat the whole joke is rendered anticlimactic. Besson has displayed a deft touch with amoral characters before, namely in 1994’s “The Professional,” where he turned therelationshipbetweenahitman andhisinfatuated12-year-oldprotégé into a heartbreaking tale of en loco parentis. “The Family” has moments like that: Jones and DeNiro’s annoyedbanter,Pfeiffer waxing about olive oil with the two suits who track her family’s every move. The acting carries the movie, yet too often Besson and Michael Caleo’s script does the heavy lifting, trying to win us over with its ah-those-barbaricAmericans shtick. They love pea-

nut butter and solve their problemswithviolenceandvulgarity! It’s a movie of short cuts, including Besson’s insistence that every family member is thuggish, which traps the movie in the same mildly amusing joke. (Also baffling: not taking full advantage of Jones’ crustiness.) At its best, “The Family’s” cast drapes its well-wornperformancesoveryou like a blanket on Sunday morning. But Besson is in such a rush to get to the next punch line that he doesn’t realize that the actors are actually saving the film from hisownrudderlessapproach. -To read more of Pete’s cinematic musings, please visit whatpeteswatching.blogspot. com or follow him on Twitter, @ PeteCroatto. W

Actors Circle at Providence Playhouse (1256 Providence Rd, Scranton, reservations: 570.342.9707, actorscircle.org) • “Ghost of a Chance”: Sept. 19-22, 27-29, 8 p.m. Thursdays through Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays. $12, general; $10, seniors; $8, students. Sept. 19 tickets are $8, general and seniors; 46, students. • “Miracle on 34th Street”: Sept. 22, 5:30 p.m.; Sept. 24, 7 p.m. Needed: children ages 8 through 11 and adults of all ages. Show dates are Nov. 14-24. The Corner Bistro Community Theater (76 S Main St, Carbondale. 570.282.7499) • “Nunsense”: Sept. 13-14, 8 p.m., Sept. 15, 2 p.m. $20; $2 off ticket price if use the “code word,” Sr. Amnesia. Jason Miller Playwrights Project (570.591.1378, nepaplaywrights@live. com) • Dramatists Support Group: Third Thursday of each month, 7 p.m., The Olde Brick Theatre (126 W. Market St., Scranton). King’s College Theatre (Admin. Bldg., 133 N. River St., WilkesBarre, 570.208.5825) • “Almost, Maine”: Oct. 3-5, 7:30 p.m.; Oct. 5-6, 2 p.m. $12; $5, students/senior citizens. KISS Theatre Company • The Jungle Book Kids: Sept. 20-21, 27-28, 7 p.m.; Sept. 21-22, 28-29, 2 p.m. • Children of Eden: Nov. 8-9, 15-16, 7 p.m.; Nov. 10, 17, 2 p.m. Registrations upcoming workshops: See www.kisstheatre.org for registration forms. • My Son Pinocchio Jr.: Ages 8-16, starts Sept. 23. • The Aristocats Kids: Ages 4-10, classes begin Oct. 19. the lamp post . chapter one (47 North Franklin St - third ﬂoor Wilkes-Barre) • Creation Destruction Potential, a collection of theatrical, visual, and musical art & performance: Sept. 4, 8 p.m. $5. Little Theatre of Wilkes-Barre ( 537 North Main StreetWilkes-Barre. 570.823.1875.) • “Spamalot”: Sept. 7-15, 8 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays, 3 p.m. Sundays. $18. The Moose Exchange (203 W. Main St., Bloomsburg) • “Lucy, I’m Dead!”: Nov. 2, 7:30 p.m. $25 until Sept. 30, $30 after that date. • USO-style show to honor local veterans at Veterans’ Day: Nov. 9. $35 until Sept. 30, $40 thereafter. M.P.B. Community Players (531GarﬁeldSt.,Hazleton.570.454.3305, mcgroganj@gmail.com) • “Wonderful Town:” Sept. 27,-29 Music Box Players (196 Hughes St., Swoyersville: 570.283.2195 or 800.698. PLAY or musicbox.org) • Music Theatre Academy 2013: Theatre

Workshop for students ages 6 to 20. Tuition: $250 - $200 if paid before Sept. 1. Sessions begin Sept. 16. Students will perform Seussical JR – The Musical, Oct. 25-27. • Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5: Sept. 13-15, 20-22, 27-29. Fridays and Saturdays bar opens 6 p.m., dinner 6:30, curtain 8; Sundays bar opens 1 p.m., dinner 1:30, curtain 3. $34.00, dinner and show; $16, show only. The Phoenix Performing Arts Centre (409-411 Main St., Duryea, 570.457.3589, phoenixpac.vpweb.com, phoenixpac08@ aol.com) • Phoenix Kids present “Willy Wonka the Musical”: Sept. 13-29, 7 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays. $10. Pines Dinner Theatre (448 North 17th St., Allentown. 610.433.2333. pinesdinnertheatre.com) • “Route 66”: Sept. 6-Oct. 20, Wednesdays through Sundays. $48.50, adults; $46.50, seniors (60+); $20, children under the age of 16. Includes dinner, beverages during dinner, the show, and tax. Shawnee Playhouse (570.421.5093, theshawneeplayhouse. com) • “Roses in December:” Sept. 13-14, 8 p.m.; Sept. 15, 2 p.m. $18, adults; $15, seniors; $10, children 12 and under. • “The Odd Couple”: Sept. 20, 28, Oct. 4, 12, 18, 8 p.m.; Sept. 22, 26, Oct. 2, 6, 10, 16, 20, 2 p.m. $28, adults; $25, seniors; $15, children under 12. • “The Female Odd Couple”: Sept. 21, 27, Oct. 5, 11, 19, 8 p.m.; Sept. 25, 29, Oct. 3, 9, 13, 17, 2 p.m. $28, adults; $25, seniors; $15, children under 12. Theatre at the Grove (5177 Nuangola Road, Nuangola. nuangolagrove.com, 570.868.8212, grovetickets@frontier.com) Ticket pricing: $18, plays; $20, musicals; $86, summer pass, ﬁrst ﬁve shows; $120, season pass. All shows are BYOB and feature cabaret seating. • “The Mousetrap:” Sept. 13, 14, 19-21, 8 p.m.; Sept. 15, 22, 3 p.m. • “Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street:” Oct. 18, 19, 25, 26, Nov. 1, 2, 8 p.m.; Oct. 20, 27, Nov. 3, 3 p.m. • “It’s a Wonderful Life:” Nov. 29, 30, Dec. 6, 7, 12-14, 8 p.m.; Dec. 1, 8, 15, 3 p.m. Wilkes University (84 W. South St, Wilkes-Barre, 1.800. WILKES.U, wilkes.edu) • “The Curious Savage”: Sept. 26-28, 8 p.m., Sept. 29, 2 p.m. • “Seussical, The Musical:” Nov. 8-9, 15-16, 8 p.m., Nov. 10, 17, 2 p.m. • “The No-Frills Revue”: Feb. 14-15, 21-22, 8 p.m., Feb. 16, 23, 2 p.m. • Check out Chekhov, An Evening of One Act Plays by Anton Pavlovich Chekov: April 3-5, 8 p.m., April 6, 2 p.m. Expanded listings at theweekender. com. W

Send your listings to WBWnews@civitasmedia.com, 90 E. Market St., WilkesBarre, Pa., 18703, or fax to 570.831.7375. Deadline is Mondays at 2 p.m. Print listings occur up until three weeks from publication date.

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

We want

you the

weekender

is looking for energetic and eager interns to become part of a publication that has had its ﬁnger on the pulse of the NEPA arts and entertainment scene for the past 20 years. We’re looking for both editorial and marketing interns that are creative, deadline driven, team players, and have a good work ethic with an outgoing personality. EDITORIAL - Must have an interest/ experience in writing - Comfortable with interviewing story subjects - Willing to take on a broad range of topics - Willingness to help out with all aspects of the publication

MARKETING - Energetic and motivated - Willing to dedicate time and effort to events and projects - Ability to generate ideas and see them through - Sense of design

If interested, please submit a resume with a brief paragraph about why you think you ﬁt the job description to weekender@theweekender.com by Sept. 18.

Page 25

Our events are primarily at local entertainment venues, making it a good way to network while also learning the ins and outs of a weekly entertainment paper.

age 26 WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2013

102.3-FM The Mountain Every Sunday from 8-9 p.m.

ENTERTAINMENT REPORT

Ralphie Aversa | Special to the Weekender

Pope pleased by Levine’s blessing

WITH ALAN K. STOUT

Rachel Myers, of White Haven, with IronE Singleton, or “T-Dog” from The Walking Dead, at Parafest at the Sands Casino in Bethlehem, Sept. 6, 2013. Had an encounter with someone famous? If so, the Weekender wants your picture for our Starstruck. It doesn’t matter if it happened five months ago or five years ago. Send us your photo, your name, hometown, the celebrity you met, and when and where you met them, and we’ll run one photo here each week. E-mail high resolutin JPEGs to weekender@theweekender.com or send your photos to Starstruck, c/o The Weekender, 1 N. Main St., Wilkes-Barre, PA, 18703.

RONNIE WILLIAMS NOWHERE SLOW ASIZ TONY HALCHAK MIZ IRON COWBOY CABINET

BOBBIE BURNETT ORANGE TABBY Owner: Lil Burnett Miners Mills Enter your pet for Weekender’s PET OF THE WEEK by sending photo, pet’s name, breed if applicable, owner’s name and hometown to: weekender@theweekender.com subject line: Pet of the Week

Hey Monday singer Cassadee Pope is getting a second chance as a recording artist when her debut solo album, ‘Frame by Frame,’ is released on Oct. 8.

in front of teenagers and senior citizens alike. “The only thing that has really stayed the same are my friendships, and my relationship, and my family; we’re still very close,” Pope remarked. She has dated All Time Low drummer Rian Dawson since her days as the frontwoman for Hey Monday. “But, everything (else) is different.” Pope’s debut album, “Frame by Frame,” comes out Oct. 8. SAMBERG RETURNS TO THE TUBE

Andy Samberg is back on your TV screen every week this fall, just on a new night with a different network. The “Saturday Night Live” alumnus stars in “Brooklyn Nine-Nine,” a comedy about a group of detectives in a New York precinct. The sitcom premiered Tuesday on FOX. “We’ve had meetings with ex-detectives and former cops and stuff to make sure that we’re

not doing anything that could be deemed disrespectful to law enforcement,” Samberg revealed to “The Ralphie Show.” “The show’s not really in it to make fun of that aspect of it. (The show is) courteous of the actual job but it’s also… what we’ve been told is kind of honest to the fact that there’s a lot of down time and a lot of silliness going on behind the scenes as well.” The latter is plentiful in the show as a motley group of law enforcement officials attempt to solve murders and other crimes in the borough. Samberg explained what he enjoys about Brooklyn. “Certainly all of the style, and the food, and the people,” he said before adding, “the Hassids.” “What’s not to love?” -Listen to “The Ralphie Show” weeknights from 7 p.m.-midnight on 97 BHT. W

PAGE 27

FACEBOOK.COM/ MUSICONTHEMENU

In an interview almost a year ago on “The Ralphie Show,” Adam Levine made it clear that when it came to the music industry, he was a fan of second chances. “If I had to choose between something to watch, it would be the person that had been knocked down a couple times, where you’d want to see, ‘Oh my God, is this person going to finally do it?’” “The Voice” coach responded after I asked him about Cassadee Pope, the former Hey Monday lead singer who was shooting for higher stars after a first attempt under Columbia Records. “If it’s someone’s first chance, sorry kid, you know, tough call. Who cares? You’re going to have 10 more.” Pope was happy enough just to receive that second opportunity and was also pleased to hear Levine’s remarks. “I got a lot of comments when I was on the show about how I already had my chance; I should not be doing a show like that, I already had some success,” the season three winner recalled during an interview with “The Ralphie Show” that aired last week. “Hearing him say that means a lot because I felt like I had been through the grind. I had worked really hard, and it didn’t work out, and this was finally a chance to really knock it out of the park.” In the process, Pope would transform from a pop rock princess that played rough with the boys on stage to a solo country artist who felt comfortable performing

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 28

Surviving the ‘Dead’ By Rich Howells Weekender Editor

wo years ago, a friend told actor Vincent Ward that he should be on AMC’s hit TV series “The Walking Dead.” “Why would I want to be on a show about zombies?” he replied. “A year later, I’m on a show about zombies.” Born and raised in Dayton, Ohio, Ward was a basketball star and a dancer in a rap group before catching the acting bug after watching a play. “I fell in love with it that day. That day I told myself, “I can do that,” and the following week, I went and auditioned and I got a part with that same play company. I never even thought about acting ever,” he recalled in an interview with The Weekender just after an audition.

“I think it was more of how the audience reacted, that quick reaction for the audience. I always felt like I’ve had the entertainment bug in me.” After moving to Los Angeles, where he has resided for 13 years, he has earned roles in ﬁlms like “Trafﬁc” and “Ocean’s Eleven” and TV shows like “The Wire” and “Everybody Hates Chris,” noting that the hardest part of the industry is just not giving up. “I’ve had friends that moved out here and they couldn’t cut it or they didn’t have enough patience, man. Another hard thing is having patience. You have to be patient,” he advised. Though he looked at it as “just another audition,” Ward got a major break when he tried out for the character of Oscar in the third season of “The Walking Dead,” a part shrouded in secrecy at the

time. The character was called “Mouse” to avoid leaks to the press. “The character of Mouse was just like my character, Oscar, and Oscar is just like Vincent, to be honest with you. I was really and truly playing myself. When they pulled a gun on me, I’ve had a gun pulled out on me twice – once by somebody I knew! And I didn’t plead for my life then, neither time,” he emphasized. “I don’t even read the entire script; I just read my part. I go through the script and I look for Oscar or whoever I’m playing and I focus on that.” He hadn’t even seen the record-breaking series until his fourth episode, but he loved every minute of his time on set. “Even though at that time I was staying like an hour away from where we were ﬁlming, every day I would drive – I don’t care if it was 5 or 6 o’clock in the

morning – I would drive with a smile on my face because I felt like I was a part of something, you know, even though I really didn’t know what ‘The Walking Dead’ was,” Ward explained. “Everybody that’s in prison isn’t a bad guy; they just made a mistake, and that’s what happened with my character. I had a wife, I had kids – I got caught stealing, once, and that’s how I ended up in prison… That’s why I say Oscar is very close to how Vincent is, or Vincent is very close to how Oscar is. I’m not saying I’ve been in jail, but I just think they thought a lot alike and I was basically just being myself.” He wasn’t the only one invested in his character during Ward’s often intense scenes. In a showdown with star Andrew Lincoln, who plays group leader Rick Grimes, Lincoln took the scene a bit too far.

“Andy was so hyped up he kicked me! He kicked me in the stomach and I didn’t even know what the hell to do. I got pissed!” he said with a laugh. “As soon as it was over, he’s like, ‘Vince, I am so sorry! I don’t even know what I was thinking about!’” And while the zombie apocalypse scenario may be fake, the action is very real, as both Ward and Norman Reedus, who portrays fan-favorite Daryl Dixon, discovered. “When Norman has the knife to my neck, it was

a real knife and he didn’t want to do it. I said, ‘Let’s go – just don’t press it against me.’” After starring in seven episodes, it was Ward’s death scene during a gunﬁght with an opposing survivor group, though, that was the most difﬁcult to shoot. “I was sad. I was really and truly sad. It was for a couple reasons: one, because I wasn’t going to be around anymore to be around my fellow co-stars, and I had become close to them as far as like being on

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

“I think my death could have been a lot better than what it was… A lot of fans have brought to my attention or asked why can’t they have more than one black guy on the show at a time. And I never even thought about that until it happened to me.” –Vincent Ward then kill Vincent, here’s Tyreese. I think whoever’s behind the scenes really and truly need to look at that because the fans are starting to look at that and a lot of black people are starting to look at that. “Who knows what’s going to happen with Oscar? They didn’t show me get shot in the head, so who knows?” The 42-year-old said he “had a great time” despite this, and it’s opened up many other doors since, even leading to an unlikely friendship with co-star Lew Temple, who will be appearing with Ward at Infect Scranton this weekend. “That’s my brother from another mother, man. Lew is a great guy, and I probably never had chemistry with somebody like this, on the set and off the set. You would think me and Lew have been friends for years. We call ourselves the new Danny Glover and Mel Gibson, and I told him, ‘Somebody’s going to give us a spinoff or our own show,’ because our chemistry is on-point. We’re talking about trying to do something together, but we’ll see,” he said. Ward has since traded in his prison jumpsuit for a suit and tie, which he is often seen in at conventions, but what would the up-and-coming actor do if zombies were real? Arm himself with an ax or tire iron and pray. “Just watching over my shoulder a lot, just like we did on ‘The Walking Dead.’ I would just be praying. That’s it. Praying with whatever weapon I have and just be ready to go to war to protect me and mine.”

Photo by Amanda Dittmar Makeup for the cover and the above photo was provided by Taney’s Costume Shop, NEPA’s only full service costume shop since 1926. Taney’s will also be creating zombies at Infect Scranton.

Infect Scranton Infect Scranton: Sept. 20-22. Info: infectscranton.com. Rates as they are listed on the website (some fees may apply): VIP Survivor: $50 Ultimate Survivor: $199.99 Ofﬁcial Infect Scranton T-shirt: $15; $20 for XXL and larger Saturday General Admission: $25 Sunday General Admission: $20 General Admission Weekend Pass: $40 Weekend Family Pass: $70 Sunday Ticket, Free T-shirt: $20

ZOMBIE KICK-OFF

The weekend’s festivities will begin with the Undead Fed, a world recordbreaking attempt that will also help out a local charity. Dress up as a zombie and join the Infect Scranton

team on Sept. 20 at 6 p.m. at the Mall at Steamtown and bring a non-perishable food item. The goal is to have as many zombies as possible in one place, while also collecting goods for the Scranton Rescue Mission. Travis Love, one of the Governor’s henchmen on “The Walking Dead,” will be on hand for free photos and autographs. All participants must register online, though tickets are free. They’re just required as proof of a total number for the Guinness World Record folks. Afterward, be sure to put that zombie costume to good use and hit up the zombie pub crawl, which will travel through several establishments in downtown Scranton starting at 9 p.m.

THE BIG RACE

The Zombie Survivor challenge is a zombieinfested 5K (3.1-mile) obstacle course that will be

held at Montage Mountain. Runners will carry their “lives” on their belts. During the race, participants will avoid zombies (both shamblers that hang about in an assigned place and hypers that actually run the course starting ﬁve minutes after the humans), tackle obstacles both man-made and natural and try to survive. There is an added element this year, as Luzerne County Paintball will have a special obstacle (that has the option of being skipped). Runners will be provided (from a stationary position, after putting on safety goggles) a weapon with only three rounds (paintballs). Runners will have to hit targets. If you don’t have three successful shots, you have the potential of losing one life before proceeding on the course. First wave starts at 10

a.m. with waves following every 15 minutes. Participants must be 14-years-old on the day of the race. All race participants will receive the following as part of their experience: 1. A super cool, highquality performance running T-shirt. 2. A medal (survivor or infected) to use when bragging to your friends. 3. Having a celebrity (from “The Walking Dead,” “Dawn of the Dead,” and more) actually greet you at the ﬁnish line and present your medal. 4. A pretzel dog, soda, and bag of chips. 5. Admission to the Green Zone (party area and where the beer will ﬂow from nice cold taps). 6. Admission to the Infect Scranton convention. Race proceeds will go to efforts to build a children’s splash park in Taylor Borough.

Page 29

the set and working with them. Everybody was so professional all the time and I loved it. There was no egos. There wasn’t no, ‘I’m the lead and you’re not.’ There wasn’t any of that, even behind the scenes,” Ward said. “Two, it was sad, but I have to admit, I was also a little angry about the situation for the simple fact that it’s like OK, yeah, I know it’s called ‘The Walking Dead’ and you never know who’s going to go, but I think my death could have been a lot better than what it was. “And then when I read an interview with (creator) Robert Kirkman and somebody asked him, ‘Well why did Oscar have to die?’ and his answer was, ‘Because we didn’t want him to kick the Governor’s ass,’ that really pissed me off. That was a bogus excuse, a bogus reason to me.” Ward was also not invited to be a guest on the live after-show “Talking Dead” and refers to the end of his role as “bittersweet.” “Give (Oscar) an opportunity to really go ahead and do something. He’s proved himself, he showed that he’s strong and got your back, so why not let him be around a little longer? And then even with Twitter and Facebook, one thing I hate and I can’t control is when somebody calls me T-Dog 2.0 or the token black guy because a lot of fans have brought to my attention or asked why can’t they have more than one black guy on the show at a time. And I never even thought about that until it happened to me,” he pointed out. “It was like OK, T-Dog is dead, here’s Vincent. OK,

the

10.11.13

event 2013

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 30

weekender weekender

model of the year

Entertainment by:

KoHN Britt Rice Abstract peoples Dj Hersh

Geek Culture & more

Rich Howells | Weekender Editor

Retro Con is the future of con experiences

As I sit here and admire my custom sketch of the mirrormasked Cobra Commander from the original “G.I. Joe: A Real American Hero” series by his very creator, Larry Hama, I think it’s safe to say that the second annual Retro Con, held at the Greater Philadelphia Expo Center in Oaks, Pa., on Saturday, Sept. 14, was another rousing success, particularly for this nostalgia-loving nerd. As I pulled into the parking lot, I wondered which building the con was in until I saw the Mystery Machine, General Lee, KITT, Bumblebee, a “Jurassic Park” jeep, and other custom vehicles displayed out front. Then I knew I had come to the right place. I may have arrived a bit late for the Angry Video Game Nerd and Nostalgia Critic signings, but I did get there just in time for their Q&A panel, complete with a musical introduction by Kyle Justin, Internet-famous for his AVGN theme song. They answered many funny and serious questions, including from a puppet and your obligatory guy in a Deadpool costume, then snuck off together right after, so I expect another video collaboration relatively soon. The main ﬂoor was twice as big this year, with two full rooms of dealers selling everything from your childhood. If your parents never got you that giant He-Man playset you always wanted, then Christmas is better late than never because you could buy it there still in its original box. The two warehouse rooms echoed with the sounds of ‘80s cartoon themes and other recognizable tunes from a DJ booth in the corner while fans haggled for rare and obscure toys or that one action ﬁgure that’s been missing from their collections. I picked up

a few Marvel ﬁgures mint on card for the same price I would have paid back in the ’90s, along with a “Marvel Super Heroes Secret Wars” Kang from 1984 still in the package for a mere $8. If that doesn’t excite you, you may be reading the wrong column. The guests signing autographs ranged from Don Fullilove, who played future mayor Goldie Wilson in “Back to the Future” to Neil Ross, the voice of many memorable characters in “Transformers,” “G.I. Joe,” “Voltron,” and countless other beloved cartoons. Ross and I chatted about the “Pryde of the X-Men” pilot he worked on that wasn’t picked up for a full series, recalling that the recordings took all day and into the night with take after take as he signed a G.I. Joe comic for me. I then discussed that same star-spangled franchise with author Mark Bellomo, who writes the most complete toy guides one could possibly imagine along with amazing behind-the-scenes information for the complete collections of the original Marvel comic series, now published by IDW. Learning about his writing process and how it ties in with his massive collection of every toy line from the ‘60s on (not an exaggeration) made my own fandom seem lacking in comparison, but very fan is created equal in a room like this – we’re here to share more than brag. Though there was one competition – a costume contest that had some amazing entries. A woman dressed as the “Sharknado” won, taking home a custom-made Skeletor trophy, and many of the unique door prizes were also hand-crafted. Her getup wasn’t exactly retro, but it was extremely creative. The

creativity I admired most came from Larry Hama, however. Wearing black cap and a t-shirt with the Arashikage clan symbol on it, he quietly sat next to Bellomo throughout the day sketching any character fans requested – I chose Cobra Commander because he was always my favorite of all the Joes and Cobras he created, and even those who asked for the same character were given completely different drawings. He graciously posed for a picture (appropriately taken by a man dressed in a Cobra uniform) after signing a stack of my Joe comics and listening to me thank him and blather on. The opportunity really made me appreciate Retro Con even more; it may not be some massive, sold-out gathering with movie stars and directors ﬂying in from the West Coast for big announcements and even bigger lines, but that’s not what it’s all about. From the custom door prizes to the fan-favorite guests to the insane amount of toys and collectibles from years gone by, and even the opportunity to shoot Nerf darts at Stormtroopers for charity, Retro Con is quickly becoming one of my favorite conventions of the year because it’s small, simple, and DIY. Many of the best cons in the tri-state area have turned into expensive investments with less and less payoff as prices continue to climb and focus on what’s important continues to fall, but Retro Con grew this year without losing sight of the reason why it did. I’m already saving for next year. Rich Howells is a lifelong Marvel Comics collector, wannabe Jedimaster, and cult ﬁlm fan. E-mail him at rhowells@civitasmedia.com. W

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WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

page 32

SARA POKORNY

Weekender staff Writer

Now is the perfect time to take a stroll downtown: the evenings are turning chilly, making it perfect weather for a light jacket, warm drink, and the soft glow of sunset as it washes over the many buildings that line Main Street. This month’s Third Friday Art Walk in WilkesBarre is upon us and, as always, it’s bringing a variety of cultural events in the city’s galleries, restaurants, boutiques, and businesses. No matter your taste – the itch to try some new cuisine, the need to lay eyes on beautiful artwork, the urge to hear original local music – there’s something for everyone. This month’s Third Friday brings with it another event, the ﬁrst of its kind: Wilkes-Barre Restaurant Week. The Downtown Wilkes-Barre Business Association, Diamond City Partnership, Humford Equities, and NEPA Geeks are putting on the event that allows local folks to sample cuisine from area restaurants that they may not have previously had a chance to dine at. Those participating include Anthracite, Barnes & Noble, Bart & Urby’s, Boscov’s, Bottlenecks, Cafe Toscana, Froyo Mania, IBOP Coffee Company, III Guys Pizza, Katana, King of Kings Gyros, Maers BBQ, Mimmo’s Pizza, Oyster Restaurant, Pete’s Place Middle Eastern Restaurant, Rodano’s, S&W Restaurant, and Senunas’ Bar and Grill. View menus and more online at wbrestaurantweek.com. W

ThiRd FRidAY ART WAlK sept. 20, 5-8 p.m., downtown Wilkes-barre.

Third Friday combines with Wilkes-Barre Restaurant Week

SARA POKORNY

Weekender staff Writer

The time for hauntings is upon us. September comes to a close in less than two weeks, and with it comes a rash of haunted attractions all over Northeast Pennsylvania, from houses to cornﬁelds and hayrides – but have you ever entered a historic trolley to get your seasonal scares in? For the third year, the Lackawanna Historical Society will play host to the Trolley of Terror, a vicious voyage on a rail line in downtown Scranton. The trolley travels through the historic Laurel Line, a Pennsylvania third rail electric interurban streetcar line that operated commuter train service from 1903 to 1952 and freight service until 1976. It’s also known as the Lackawanna & Wyoming Valley Railroad. The line is commonly referred to as the Laurel Line due to the predominance of the aforementioned wildﬂower throughout its route. That, however, is where the sweetness of the line stops – at least in terms of the Trolley of Terror. “On the ride, there are some actors who are called out as characters of a plot line that deals with the Legend of the Black Diamond, in order to

Terrible boss makes great play

MARY THERESE BIEBEL

From the times Leader

TROLLEY Of TERROR Presented by the Lackawanna Historical society sept. 20-21. the tour will meet at the society’s headquarters, the Catlin House, at 232 monroe avenue.$25, society members; $30, nonmembers. tickets are available at the Lackawanna Historical society or by calling 570.344.3841. reﬂect our area’s history,” said Mary Ann MoranSavakinus, executive director of the historical society. “Supposedly, there was some gem discovered by a miner that brought him disaster in his life, and that pushes the plot line as the trolley goes along.” Moran-Savakinus said they don’t encourage children under 12 to board the trolley, as there are traditional scares and dark spots in the ride. “You’ll deﬁnitely be frightened, but we’re not looking to traumatize anyone,” she said with a laugh. The Laurel Line has an already-existing area that makes the trolley ride perfect. “There is a tunnel, and it’s so dark,” Moran-Savakinus said. “You could be in there at noon and it’s still pitch black. It’s a mile-long tunnel.” In previous years, a walking tour was offered prior to boarding the Trolley of Terror, but this year that turned into a wagon ride

that seats 15 people, the tickets for which have sold out for this weekend. The wagon ride concludes where the trolley boards, serving as a precursor to the scares. “The wagon makes it a little more historical in nature,” said MoranSavakinus. “We talk about the history of the city, whereas the trolley is more of a haunted hayride attraction.” The entire production would not be possible without the volunteers, who Moran-Savakinus said “go above and beyond.” “Most of them made their own costumes and do their own makeup,” she continued. The society has also received help from Brookvalley Farm in Carbondale, who has provided horses for the wagon rides, and members of two other local haunted attractions who have lent their services: Reaper’s Revenge and Circle of Screams. W

How obnoxious is Mr. Hart? “Oh, he’s terrible. He likes to hit on his employees, and he’s very misogynistic,” said Cate McDonald of Scranton, who plays ofﬁce worker Doralee in “Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5,” which opened last weekend at the Music Box Playhouse in Swoyersville. “He feels there’s no place for women in the workplace.” Unless they’re his playthings? “Exactly,” McDonald said. “(My character has to) climb a ladder to get a ﬁle from the highest shelf and he looks up my skirt. It’s pretty gross.” From sexual harassment to spreading untrue rumors to taking credit for other people’s ideas, Hart commits just about every offense on the “bad boss” list. “He really deserves his comeuppance,” said Dana Feigenblatt, who is directing the show. “I think anyone who’s had to deal with a terrible boss has dreamed of kidnapping him and taking over the workplace,” said McDonald, explaining

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

Uncovering the Legend of the Black Diamond

Courtesy Photos Mr. Hart (Bill Lipski) endures the revenge taken by Judy (Amanda Reese), Doralee (Cate McDonald), and Violet (Ericka Law) in ‘Dolly Parton’s 9 to 5.’

that’s just what Doralee and her co-workers Judy and Violet, played respectively by Ericka Law and Amanda Reese, manage to do. But before they tie him up and suspend him (literally, from the ceiling), the trio engages in some wild fantasies about doing him in. “In the cowgirl fantasy, Doralee comes out with a lasso and hogties him,” Feigenblatt said. “In the Snow White fantasy, he is poisoned with coffee and dies on a desk. We have the ensemble dressed as wood-

Page 33

land creatures for that. And, in Judy’s fantasy, she does a seductive dance and leaves him tied up.” When the women abandon fantasies in favor of actual revenge, they put Hart into a harness and leave him dangling over the stage. “This is the second show I’m doing where it happens,” said Bill Lipski of Nanticoke, who plays Hart. “In ‘Les Mis,’ I was Javert, another mean person. When I jumped off the bridge, they suspended me in mid-air until the end of the song. “I’m used to it by now.” The show is set in 1979, which meant costumer Jimmy Williams “scoured every Salvation Army for vintage clothes,” McDonald said. Audiences will enjoy the upbeat music, she predicted, as well as the show’s “very woman power-heavy” aspect, which shows the female characters working together to accomplish their goals – and running the office more efficiently when Hart isn’t around. As an added benefit, McDonald said, “I get to do the role with two very dear friends of mine, and we get to put our actual caring into our performance.” W

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

page 34

BEHIND THE ROTTING FLESH Mike Christopher Film: “Dawn of the Dead” (1978) Character: Hare Krishna Zombie How did you end up being cast as a zombie? I was in a theatrical rock band named FLUID. We had a space-themed stage show. I had a bald head as part of my character.

Sharon Ceccatti-Hill Film: “Dawn of the Dead” (1978) Character: Nurse Zombie How did you end up being cast as a zombie? My husband, Clayton, and I, who was the featured lead Escalator Sweater Zombie, were doing stage work (operettas) at the Pittsburgh Playhouse when we heard George

(Director) George (Romero) was looking for some zombies that would be different than blue jeans and plaid shirts. He especially wanted something different for my part because since I was the zombie who discovered the hideout in the mall. Did you have any say in your appearance or costume or your onscreen death? I didn’t even read the script when I showed up for my scenes. Everything I did was done on one take… George wanted every zombie to make up his own character. What was shooting your death scene like? It was over in an instant.

Romero was looking for talent for his upcoming movie to be shot in and around Pittsburgh. We both interviewed with George with portfolio in hand of our singing and dancing photos for consideration. We both were cast as lead zombies and to be credited as such. Were you a horror movie fan before playing a zombie or was this genre new to you? This genre was all new to me! I had no idea what

One minute I was grasping at Fran’s legs dangling in front of me…next instant Roger was coming at me with a riﬂe butt to the head. How do you prepare to play a zombie? I got a sick feeling in my stomach like I was going to puke then tried to maintain that feeling all through my scenes. How do you think your character became a zombie? I have thought of a backstory for my character but I don’t have the ﬁnancing to pull off the movie since it would have to be shot in the ‘70s. How long did a typical day of makeup and shooting take?

a zombie was! George just laughed. Did you have any say in your appearance or costume? There was a nurse’s outﬁt in wardrobe. He said he wanted me to wear that. With having no blood applied to it, he wanted to feature me pure-looking, so I could stand out. How long did a typical day of makeup and shooting take? My makeup didn’t take that long, since I only

My makeup is easy – gray all over and a knot of hair coming out the top of my head. Takes about 45 minutes to blend it even. I had three days shooting, two in the mall which went like this: Get to the mall after it closes around 9 p.m. Sit in a room full of people turning into zombies by the makeup people. Sit around drinking coffee all night until someone frantically runs into the room saying, “I need you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, you, and you. Follow me.” Everyone gets

needed to apply to my hands, face, and neck. My hair took the longest. I had to have grease throughout my hair… Actually, John Amplas who was a raider and also “Martin” (another Romero ﬁlm) at the time was responsible for taking control of my look… We shot most of the scenes at Monroeville Mall, which is east of the city, from 9 p.m. to 7 a.m. Long hours but not unusual for shooting a ﬁlm. How do you prepare to

into place in the mall until George says “action,” then we shamble around until he yells “cut,” then we go back into the room and wait until someone runs frantically back into the room again! What was going through your mind during your scenes? Why didn’t someone think about the hot sulfur sparks falling on the ﬂoor that are burning the soles of my feet?

Do people ever recognize you outside of your makeup? Only one time about two years ago. I was in a bar in Ybor City and a guy was having his birthday party there. He came over and asked me if I was the Hare Krishna Zombie from “Dawn of the Dead.” I gave him an autograph on a small picture I usually have with me and he was thrilled.

play a zombie? The way I prepared to play a zombie was to always stay in character no matter what the scene. I would get into my zombie by feeling I was dead – not really sure how that is – but to look dazed. I would walk slowly, roll my eyes to the back of my head with arms extended, looking for human ﬂesh. At that point, I just wanted to survive. How do you think your character became a zombie? I am assuming my role became a zombie from all the long hours working as a nurse and dying due to stress. And no, I never was a real nurse working in a hospital in Pittsburgh. Is there anything else you’d like to mention? I would like to mention

my husband, who passed away four years ago, who cannot be with us, but only in spirit… His name is Clayton D. Hill. He was known for his funny stint on the escalator going up backwards. The look on his face is surreal. He also was featured. He was the weapons coordinator on the ﬁlm. He loaded and unloaded all the weapons that were ﬁred. He would collect the used shell casings after the scene was shot, put them in a bag, and go to the next scene. He saved these empty shell casings. After all these years, he put them to use. I sell them at conventions. They are enclosed in a case with his autograph. It was the last signature he did.

guess what might be coming next, but as far as the top coming off, I was a couple of boxes standing up higher. The makeup prosthetic piece on top of my head was, I don’t know, an inch and half or something like that high, and then that was cut into chunks and threaded together with monofilament line, so it looked like it was one complete piece, but then from off camera at the right moment, somebody yanked on a piece of monofilament line attached to that piece on top of my head. That then flew off. The blood came from two guys behind the boxes using hand pumps with tubes going up through the back of my trousers and shirt and into

which is where we learned the basic shufﬂe and responses. But it’s really an individual study. You make it a apart of who you are and think about the backstory of your walker. Were you a business man, did you have kids, where and what were you doing when you turned? There’s a lot of things to prepare for it, and it’s a great way to keep each walker different from the next. Do people ever recognize you outside of your makeup? It hasn’t been until recently that people have recognized me outside of makeup, but it’s actually pretty funny when they ask or freak out. I still haven’t grasped that I’m a small celebrity. I see these people

the top of the head. One of those guys was Tom Savini. What was Savini and Romero’s direction to you during your scene? Tom Savini said, “Hey, I want you to be like a zombie.” “OK.” …I said, “Tom, I haven’t been to any of the other scenes. I haven’t seen any of the other zombies. Is there a particular thing I’m supposed to do? He said, “Well, you just kind of be like a zombie,” and so your imagination takes over. I said, “Well do they talk? Do they yell or moan or do anything like that?” He said, “You can do whatever

fangirling and I’m just like, “I work at Target and barely make even. I’m not spectacular,” but when I see how excited they are when they meet me, it makes my day. What is it like having your head immortalized as a DVD box set? It still hasn’t sunk in yet. I know it’s there, I know I’m in so many houses, but I just brush it off. I guess they used the mold they made of my head for the role to make the box set, so I really had no idea until they announced it, and that was a shock. It’s pretty awesome when I’m out and about and I see someone with it and I laugh and point saying, “Hey, that’s my head!”

you want to do.” So I did some moaning. What was it like playing such an iconic zombie? I always wondered, “Wouldn’t it be wonderful to be a character like Dracula, an iconic kind of character?” and so when it came to having an opportunity to do a role in a film that was a pretty much a standalone role, I definitely wanted to give it my all. I was certainly delighted with the response Did you know just how important this film would become? If you go back and ask anybody who was in “Dawn of the Dead,” “Did you think this was going to be a huge sensation and popular

across the world even today?” they would have said, “No, I’m just making a movie.” They had no idea. For me, I don’t know about that.

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Jim Krut Film: “Dawn of the Dead” (1978) Character: Helicopter Zombie How did you end up being cast as a zombie? Well, Tom Savini, who did all the makeup and special effects for “Dawn” asked me. Tom and I had gone to college together at Point Park University and we also worked in theater together… We’d been in touch and kind of been friends for a long time. I was living in Pittsburgh at the time and I ran into Tom and he said, “I’ve got this great role for you in a George Romero movie.”

How long did it take to put your makeup on? I went to Tom’s place. We did makeup sessions in his workshop. We did complete head casts, twice, when you have plaster just slathered all over your face and then you’re breathing through a straw for about 20 minutes ‘til it hardens. That was the technology at the time, so things got a little easier over time. The ﬁrst one cracked, so a few days later, I had to go back and do it again but it was probably over a two-week period to get the prosthetics and the makeup things together. What was shooting your death scene like? It was me and the blocks – there was no dummy head, and I should say that the helicopter blades were cut in afterward. The engine was running on the helicopter, and you have all the anticipation with the music. You sort of kind of

the most part is just complete direction from the producers and director. In the RV Walker death, I was asked to improvise and throw a bit of my own into it, which was pretty fun and they actually liked it and used it in the show. What was it like shooting your death scenes? Honestly, it was nerveracking. I started out worrying how well I’d be able to do the scene and remembering movements. But when the cameras are rolling and it’s time to ﬁlm the shot, I kind of slip directly into the role and just react naturally. If I’m shot in the leg, I instinctively limp or drag it. It’s all about just giving yourself over to the thought of becoming what you’re trying to convey, and once I did that, it was very liberating and freeing and made the scene incredible to shoot. How do you prepare to play a zombie? We did go to zombie school,

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

Travis Charpentier TV Show: “The Walking Dead” Characters: Zombified Shawn Greene, RV Walker (Screwdriver Zombie) How did you end up getting cast as a zombie? I got extremely lucky with the casting. I had just moved near Atlanta with some friends and they told me to apply for extra work on TV and film. They told me it was about $300 a day and it would help me put up rent money while looking for a stable real job. They gave me the e-mail to apply and boom, I got cast for the first scene of the very first episode and it took off from there. Did you have any say in your appearance or costume or your on-screen death? I honestly had no say in what I was put in but Eulyn, the wardrobe coordinator for set, has this great insight to each person’s style and which outfits would flow with whom they were on. My on-screen death for

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 36

BAZAARS/FESTIVALS 33rd Annual Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire: saturdays and sundays through Oct. 27, and Labor day monday, mount Hope estate and Winery. $29.95, adults; $10.95, children ages 5 to 11. For more info and tickets visit parenFaire. com or call the box office at 717.665.7021. Endless Mountains Nature Center (280 Vosburg road, tunkhannock. 570.836.3835.) • Wild Edible and Medicinal Workshop with nathaniel Whitmore: sept. 28, 10 a.m.-3 p.m. $20, per session; $35, whole day; $15, per session stewards fee; $25 whole day; $35, family stewardship. Freedom Fest: a salute to america’s Finest: sept. 29, 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m., mountain sky (63 still meadow Lane, Jermyn). BENEFITS/CHARITY EVENTS 2nd Annual Hope for Hannah Fundraiser: sept. 22, 1-5 p.m., 356 north everett ave., scranton American Cancer Society • Cancer Prevention Study-3 (CPS-3): Nov. 2, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., nov. 6, 4-8 p.m., Keystone College Hibbard Campus Center.

participants can register at www. keystonecps3.org. For more info call 570.562.9749. American Lung Association • Fight for Air Walk: Oct. 3, mcdade park, scranton. registration 9 a.m., run beings 9:45, walkers at 10. For more info visit lunginfo.org/scrantonwalk. American Red Cross • 11th Annual Golf Tournament: sept. 23, registration 11 a.m., shotgun start at 12:30 p.m., Glenmaura National Golf Club. dinner and awards ceremony at 6 p.m. Limited to 120 golfers. $300 per golfer. to make a reservation for golf and/or dinner, contact Carol Crane at 570.823.7161, ext. 329 or carol.crane@redcross.org. The Kelci Ever After Memorial Scholarship Inaugural 6K Run and 2K Memory Walk Oct. 6, 11 a.m., Francis slocum state park pavilion no. 3, by boat launch. registration begins at 9 a.m. $20, includes a tie-dye t-shirt. Luzerne County Pit Bull Owners, Inc. • 3rd Annual Pit Bull Awareness Day and Carnival: Oct. 26, noon-6 p.m., Kirby park. Polycystic Kidney Disease Foundation • Chapter Kick-off: Sept. 20, 6-7:30 p.m., pocono medical

Center Main Building (206 E. brown st., east stroudsburg). S.A.F.E. Walk for Autism and Resource Fair 2013: sept. 28, 9 a.m.-12:30 p.m., Hazleton area High school track. Susan G. Komen for the Cure •“Black, White & A Touch of pink” gala: sept. 27, 6-9 p.m., Woodlands Inn (1073 Highway 315, Wilkes-barre). For more info or to purchase tickets call amy andrejko at 570.820.1670 or email patriciamichael@mdlz. com. “Sweat for the Cure” Zumbathon: Oct. 5, noon-3 p.m., pro Fitness Club (3356 Birney Ave., Birney plaza, moosic). $10. For more info contact amy sekol at570.479.1000 or amy.sekol@ wilkes.edu. CAR & BIKE EVENTS Fall Festival Car Cruise (Eagle Rock Resort, 1 Country Club Dr., Hazleton) •Oct. 12, 10 a.m.-midnight. Rain date Oct. 13. Optional donation of $12 day of show, $9 preregistration. pre-register by mailing 1 Country Club Drive, Hazle township, pa 18202. McDonald’s (route 590 Hamlin, pa) • Car Cruise: Every second Friday of august, september, 6 p.m.

Montage Mountain Classics (thurs., 6-9 p.m., Fri., 6-10 p.m., sat., 5-9 p.m.) Car Cruises: • Sept. 21, 5-9 p.m., Johnny rockets, montage mountain. • Cruise to Benefit Ronald mcdonald House: sept. 22, 2-6 p.m. rain date sept. 29. CHURCHES Annunciation Greek Orthodox Church (32 east ross st., Wilkes-barre) • Greek Food Festival: Oct. 3-5, 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Orders more than $30 will be delivered free within a 2-mile radius of the church. Customers are welcome but not required to pre-order food by calling 570.823.4805 during festival hours or by ordering online atgreekfoodfestival. webs.com . For more info call 570.417.4465. Corpus Christi (montdale) • Annual Harvest Festival Turkey dinner: Oct. 6, noon-5 p.m. $10, adults; $5, children. take-outs available. Exaltation of the Holy Cross Church (420 main rd., Hanover twp., 570.823.6242) • Annual Chicken Barbecue/ Flea Market/Craft Sale: Sept. 15, noon-4 p.m. $9, dinner.

last week

additional fleamarket times sept. 20, 8 a.m.-2 p.m.; sept. 21, 8 a.m.-noon and 6-7 p.m.; sept. 22, 10 a.m.-noon. • Soup for the Soul’s Committee book, bake, and soup sale: sept. 19, 8 a.m.-6 p.m. First Presbyterian Church of Clarks Summit (300 School St., Clarks Summit, 570.586.6306, www.fpccs.org) • Excelsior Cornet Band, New York State’s Authentic Civil War brass band: Oct. 6, 4 p.m. • All-church recital with First Presbyterian Church musical ensembles: novl 17, 4 p.m. Ss. Cyril and Methodius Ukrainian Catholic Church (135 river st., Olyphant) • Third Annual Rummage Sale: sept. 20, 8 a.m.-7 p.m., sept. 21, 10 a.m.-1:30 p.m., american Legion Hall (raymond Henry post no. 327). • 125th Anniversary Celebration; Oct. 27, beginning with liturgy at 3 p.m., followed by celebration from 5-9 p.m. $40, per person; $12, children 12 and under. For tickets contact sandra at 570.383.9487. • Ukrainian Culture Day: Oct. 26, 9 a.m.-3 p.m. St. Michael’s Ukrainian Orthodox Church (540 n. main ave., scranton,

570.343.7165) • 11th Annual Ukranian Food Festival: sept. 22. Features homemade Ukrainian foods such as holupki, halushky, pyrohy, kapusta, kielbasa and baked goods. For info call 570. 961.1795. Shavertown United Methodist Church • 7th Annual Golf Tournament: Oct. 5, registration 9 a.m., shotgun start at 10, mill race and Golf Camping Resort (Benton). $80 entry fee. For questions call bev atherholt at 570.675.7295 or bill runner at 570.675.5055. Stuffed cabbage dinner: sept. 21, 4-7 p.m., sponsored by the saint dymphna Knights of Columbus, in the Holy Family Church Hall, Sugar Notch. $8. take-outs available. Limited number of tickets available at the door. For more info or a reservation, contact dave at 570.824.0994. EVENTS Arcadia Chorale (formerly the robert dale Chorale) • “Echoes of Arcadia”: Oct. 19, 8 p.m., St. Luke’s Episcopal Church, scranton; Oct. 20, 3 p.m., st. Stephen’s Episcopal Church,

SEE AGENDA, PAGE 50

DOWN ACROSS 1 Desertlike 1 Sleeping 2 Wild hog 5 “Avatar” technology 3 TV trophy (Abbr.) 4 Come ashore 8 Reverberate 5 Groups of grapes 12 Georgia city 6 Petrol 13 Young fellow 7 Mid-month date 14 Thick chunk 8 Steep slope 15 Poetic foot 9 Some old cars 16 Work with 10 Rodgers collaborator 17 Remedy 11 Follow instructions 18 Wood nymphs 19 “- as I say …” 20 Meager 21 Spy novel org. 22 Deterioration 24 French nobleman 23 Annoy 25 Hockey great Bobby 24 Harbor structure 26 Laundromat alterna27 “The Defiant Ones” tive duo 28 French possessive 32 Web address 29 Butchers’ tools 33 Prot. or Cath. 30 Type measures 34 Genetic letters 31 Perched 35 Breach in a levee 36 Shrew 38 “Hey, you!” 37 - carte 39 Have a bug 38 Shine 40 Way back when 41 “We Bring Good 42 “Lord Jim” author Things to Life” co. 45 Soft fabric 42 Urban fleet 49 Neighborhood 43 Sandwich cookie 50 Haven’t paid yet 44 Armageddon 52 Early primary state 46 November responsi53 Dave of “Mad” magability zine 47 Rams fans? 54 Rowing need 48 Spigots 55 Dance lesson 51 Doves’ aversion 56 Not good, not bad 57 “- Doubtfire” 58 Dame Myra at the piano

Rich Howells

Weekender editor

Comic books and video games are now, more than ever, socially acceptable and mainstream, so why not liveaction role-playing? That’s the question that Into the Breach Productions, a nonprofit founded in 2009 in NEPA that creates LARPs, is asking, particularly since what they do is quite different from the average game. “Traditional LARPs are set in the medieval fantasy kind of a thing – ‘Lord of the Rings,’ ‘World of Warcraft,’ that kind of setting. You have your armor, swords, bows, and dwarves… With the two games we have now, it’s very different. To my knowledge, I don’t know where the next Western LARP is. I don’t know where someone can go play cowboys for the weekend… I don’t if you can play it anywhere else in Pennsylvania,” writer Matt Navin, 28, of Edwardsville, explained. “That’s a big thing for us, always trying to do something a little bit different, a little bit outside of what you see. It helps you distinguish yourself from the established games in the area.” Into the Breach has been running two games since March – Grimdark West, a Western fantasy set in 1875 Dakota Territory, and Honors Arcana, set in modern times at Poor Richard’s Academy of Magical Arts, a finishing school for magicians in training. Both are run on weekends in Hickory Run State Park in White Haven, with Grimdark now finished for the year and Honors ending at the end of September. “We’re doing very well this year. Our entire population has grown. Even newer players have entered our player base. A good aspect of the Western game is that we’ve introduced a new communi-

ty, a new genre of LARPing to the area. And for Honors, we have a much younger crowd where parents, if they play, can bring their kids to play with them, and that’s worked out well for us. We actually had less trouble with 12-year-olds than we had with the 30-year-olds,” cracked Chris Ormando, a 35-year-old Edwardsville resident and head director of Into the Breach. Looking to raise awareness about their games as well as LARPing in general, he said his other favorite title is “nerd wrangler,” though he has plenty of help with that from his team. “You are physically being a character, dressing up in a costume, which really helps with your emergence. It’s not like you’re sitting at a table playing (Dungeons & Dragons) where you’re rolling dice. You’re still roleplaying, you’re still involved in it, but you’re still in your t-shirt eating Cheetos at a kitchen table at your friend’s house, where with this you’re in the woods and you’re running around,” designer and art director Amy Zurko, 24, of Nanticoke, explained. “You’ve got the weight of the armor on you. You’re carrying a big old piece of plywood as a shield for a while. You’ve been ﬁghting for a couple minutes, so you’re feeling that fatigue. It puts you there,” Navin added. “You feel actually scared sometimes. You feel that dread when you’re really scared because it’s dark out and there’s people trying to kill you and you have just a dinky little sword and it’s just so exciting,” Zurko continued. “We want our players to drive the story. It’s their story. It’s not our story.” Writer Ralph Pierce, 30, of Ashley, summed up the draw

How to join

makes other people react differently. “Whenever anybody reads a good novel, sometimes they’ve thought, ‘Wouldn’t it be really cool if it went this way?’ Well, it does because you acted and it changes it; it changes the whole narrative up. That’s actually one of the things that we pride ourselves on. As our players react, as they move, as they kind of shake things up, we react to them. We give them a living role, a living narrative.” Those roles vary depending on the game, and the group eagerly explains the details of both, starting with Grimdark West. “Grimdark West happens in 1875, one year before Little Bighorn. Little Bighorn happens in 1876 and you cannot change that. We’re just going to change

embrace this ongoing challenge, stretching the limits of their creativity. “LARPing, as a whole, is a way to experience life. It’s experiencing different aspects of life that you can’t normally experience,” Piece said. “That’s the big thing about LARP. It’s ‘Conan the Barbarian,’ it’s ‘Star Wars.’ Whenever you put yourself in or empathize with the main character, you can put yourself in a LARP and you can play from that point. Now the story revolves around you because you actually have an active role in it. Whatever you do impacts it,” Ormando enthused. And despite what many standing on the outside looking in might say, it’s a very social activity. “It’s kind of funny – a lot of people look at it and go, ‘Well, LARPers are all antisocial.’ There’s actually more people at a LARP than there is at your kitchen table,” Pierce said. “People I have met who have role-played their entire lives explain, ‘Hey, look, I go to a nine-to-ﬁve job. During the week, everything kind of seems blasé, but when I game, or even go hiking or shooting or to a reenactment, whatever my hobby is, it gives me that refreshing taste,’ and that’s what LARP does. LARP, for many people, is that extra step, that extra input, that extra bit of creativity that kind of feeds that need that some people have and lets them escape. It’s what makes the hobby great.” So, in other words, they’re nerds, they’re proud, and they’re recruiting. For details on joining Into the Breach games, ﬁnd them on Facebook or contact Ormando at 570.406.3763. “I went to one event, I got stuck in the mud and died, and I had the best time of my life, and nine years later, I am running LARPs and wrangling the nerds and still getting lost in mud,” Zurko emphasized with a laugh. “If you think you’ll like it, you will.” W

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For more information on Into the breach liveaction role-playing games, visit facebook.com/ groups/400105640038753/ or facebook.com/ pages/Grimdark-west/437617026298563 for grimdark West and facebook.com/HonorsArcana for Honors arcana. Head director Chris Ormando can be reached at 570.406.3763.

of LARPing by comparing it to other forms of entertainment. “It’s very much like when you go to see a movie. Depending on the genre of movie you’re going to see, you’re going there to experience a certain type of emotional connection, whether it’s a comedy or horror, whatever. LARPing can give you that in a way that sitting in a theater doesn’t always give you,” he began. “It’s closer to an actual live stage performance, when you’re sitting at the Kirby (Center) or at Little Theatre (of Wilkes-Barre) and you see the actors. There’s more of a connection there, but now you’re one of those characters. One of the interesting things about it is not only are you one of the characters, but it’s not just a script. Your actions, how you react to it,

what happens. A full weekend runs from Friday night until Sunday about noon, give or take, and if you try to plan that 40 hours of the weekend minute-by-minute, things are going to go off the rails,” Navin noted. “It’s not really steampunk, either. It’s Western. It’s like dark Western, weird West. There are undead,” Ormando clarified, comparing it to the video game “Red Dead Redemption: Undead Nightmare” with added magical elements. “I know that there’s a good number of people that go to the game because they like that style of cast-iron campfire cooking and playing a game set like that,” Navin pointed out. “I think it does a good job of bridging that gap between a game and the folks that like to go out and do Civil War reenactment… It’s very accessible for people, and I think a lot of people like to play it because you’re a pioneer in the West for a weekend.” Honors Arcana, however, is lighter and much more “whimsical.” “The game currently is set in a remote forest in Nova Scotia. The players kind of teleport there on the weekend to do their thing, and one of the things they were asked to do by the elves who live in secret in Nova Scotia is to stop this logging company from harvesting their forest. But we gave the players no indication about how to do this. There was no direction. Just figure out a way to stop them,” Navin described. “We’ve gotten feedback from players that it was some of the more rewarding LARPing they’d ever done because they really had to think on their feet… That’s what we try to do with all of our games, is give them the dilemma, give them the situation they’re facing, but not really guide them through how to solve it – leave it totally open-ended.” The writers have learned to “expect the curveball” from players, but rather than stress about what will be thrown at them next, they

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

Cowboys and wizards head Into the Breach

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 38

Fantasy football From page 10

Male Musings on love, roMance, and dating Kenny Luck | Special to the Weekender

Something as simple as opening a door can close another one, at least for one of Kenny’s dates.

Hell is other people

“Hell is other people.” This is the way the postWWII French philosopher Jean-Paul Sartre described the nature of human suffering. For a long time, I disagreed with Sartre. Plenty of people made me happy: friends, family, girlfriends, co-workers… that is, until I met “Mary.” A few years ago, after the termination of a longterm relationship, I was faced with a dilemma: do I stop dating, or do I continue to look? I decided on the latter. I could sit around and feel sorry for myself, or I could move forward. Then, right on cue, a friend approached me. “I think I might have someone for you,” he said. “She is looking for a guy, and I think this one might have potential.” I agreed to call her, and, within a few days, we had plans to meet for dinner. At ﬁrst everything seemed normal. There was some ﬂirtatious banter – which is always a plus – on the way to the restaurant in Dickson City. We talked music and movies. We laughed. Everything was going in my favor.

But something changed. After parking the car, I got out and opened her door. “It’s not 1950,” she barked. “Don’t do that.” “WTF?!” I thought. It was in that moment when I realized something was wrong. I kept my cool and pretended everything was normal, although it wasn’t. We ate a quick meal, but the ﬂirting had vanished. No more witty banter. No more jokes – just blank stares and awkward silence. I drove her back to her apartment, and, as I prepared to say good night, Mary said something unexpected: she asked me if I wanted to come inside. Seeing it as one last opportunity to salvage the evening, I agreed. I sat on her couch sipping a glass of water while she disappeared upstairs. Within a few minutes, Mary reappeared, sexily clad in tight PJs, and sat on the couch next to me. “I can have you in a minute if I wanted,” she said. “You’re too easy. Women don’t like that. They want an aggressive, take-charge guy.”

She lectured me for almost an hour, and the conversation went nowhere. There was no catharsis, no revealing moment, no “Aha,” second chance: this date was dead. After that night, I never saw Mary again. But just before I left, she had asked me if I learned anything from being with her. I didn’t. But when I asked her the same question, she said, “Maybe I should treat guys a little better in the future.” Now, every time I go on a bad date, or ask for someone’s number, or think about Mary, Sartre’s words resonate. I often wonder why opening a car door was such an affront to her femininity. That said, maybe I was wrong. Maybe I did learn something from her: if hell really exists, I was there. If not, then it was at least some bizarre version of dating purgatory. Either way, redemption isn’t possible. Perhaps I should forget this whole thing and become a celibate Buddhist monk. It might not be a bad idea. W

fantasy owner’s dream. The only problem is that we get so anxious whenever we see a quarterback have a solid game on the ground that we get overly enamored and fall in love after the ﬁrst date. After Week 1 it was hard to see anything besides Pryor’s 112 yards on the ground. We all forgot about his two interceptions against Indy’s anemic pass defense. We all knew who Terrelle Pryor was while we refused to consider him at draft time, and it’s important that we don’t forget that now. Hot start of the week: Josh Gordon WR Cleveland. Gordon is coming off a twogame suspension and he will be looking to pick up where he left off last season. He ended the 2012 season on a hot streak and he might help wake up Cleveland’s stumbling offense. Must sit this week: Any Jacksonville Jaguar. Not even Cecil Shorts is safe matching up against the Seahawks defense. Weekly match-up rankings: QB P. Manning: Too good of an arm to do anything besides destroy the Raider’s secondary. A. Rodgers: Cincinnati has a stout defense, but Rodgers has been in elite form so far this year. D. Brees: Brees loves letting it ﬂy at home in the dome and this week will be no different. C. Kaepernick: Look for a nice bounce-back performance against Indy’s struggling pass defense. M. Vick: The Eagles have been rattling off more plays than any other team this year. Vick has been putting up numbers reminiscent of himself as a Falcon in “Madden ‘04.”

M. Stafford: Washington’s defense hasn’t stopped anyone this year. Stafford and Megatron should be able to play pitch and catch until they’re bored and go home. M. Ryan: Miami’s defense is proving to be strong, but Ryan simply has too many options to throw to between Jones, White, and Gonzalez. R. Wilson: Jacksonville is just the opponent Wilson needs to get back on track after a tough match-up with San Francisco. C. Newton: Newton’s sophomore slump might still be in effect, but his ability to move the chains with his feet will keep him in my top 10. R. Griffin III: RG3 might not have been himself over the first two games of the season, but the Redskins seem to be playing lots of catch-up football and that means Griffin will have plenty of opportunities to air it out. RB A . Peterson: Obviously… L. McCoy: Philly’s uptempo offense bodes well for Vick, Jackson, and especially McCoy. M. Forte: Forte has taken a liking to the Bear’s new offensive scheme. He’s averaging 27.5 touches per game. D. Martin: Let’s face it, the Buc’s offense might end up being Muscle-Hamster-orbust week in and week out. J. Charles: He’s already banged up, but still totaled over 100 all-purpose yards this past week. M. Lynch: Lynch handled the 49er’s defense as well as one could expect. He will be rewarded with the Jags defense in Week 3. C.J. Spiller: He might be sharing the workload with Fred Jackson, but I still love Spiller’s big play ability. A. Foster: Another top

back sharing carries. Foster is still the favorite for Houston’s goal line carries R. Bush: In typical Reggie Bush fashion, he’s already banged up. Get what you can from him while he’s still on the ﬁeld. A. Morris: Morris has had limited carries with the Redskins, constantly playing from behind, but it’s much too soon to let a back like Morris fall outside the top 10. WR C. Johnson: No surprise here. A.J Green: Green Bay’s secondary is banged up and, even if they weren’t, they would still struggle to contain Green. D. Bryant- Many people predicted Dez would have a coming out party this year. Those people were right. He still has suspect hands at times, but as long as he’s healthy you can start him with conﬁdence. D. Thomas: The only thing that can slow down Thomas is Peyton Manning’s other options. J. Jones: Monitor his knee situation this week. B. Marshall: Brandon Marshall loves making Cutler look good. D. Jackson: Jackson has been running wild since Chip Kelly took over in Philly. R. Cobb: Rodgers and Cobb have been in quite the groove since last year. Don’t expect that to stop anytime soon. V. Cruz: Carolina’s secondary is beat up and Eli will bounce back last week’s loss to Peyton and the Broncos. W. Welker: Oakland’s secondary can’t contain all of Denver’s weapons. Look for a big day from the Broncos’ receiving core this week. W

Music, Motors, and More @ Toyota Pavilion at Montage Mountain • 09.15.13

Photos by Jason Riedmiller • For more photos, visit theweekender.com

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2013

LOOK WHAT YOU MISSED

PAGE 39

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,2013

age 40

Cooking with beer Derek Warren

BEER REVIEWS

Derek Warren | Weekender Correspondent

Weekender Correspondent

Treating oneself to the simple pleasures in life is a luxury that we can all afford and a true key to happiness. Great beer, enjoyed in reasonable quantities, is certainly one of these. A well-paired dish only enhances the pleasure factor, one complimenting the other. However, to improve the pleasure factor even more, there is a movement afoot to cook with your beer for a fully engrossing pleasurable experience. Sure, we have all had a beer while cooking in the kitchen or on the grill, but this movement is far more than that and even moves beyond the traditional beer-battered ﬁsh and chips or Guinness stew, not to knock these traditional and wonderful foods. However, the current interest in craft beer goes hand in hand with the rising interest in artisanal food, so it would be expected for the two interests to intersect. This naturally gives rise to new and exciting dishes that combine beer and food, and while there is still room for many traditional meals, there is a vast array of new dishes available to the consumer. Many breweries have taken to incorporating fantastic restaurants into their tasting rooms, or as separate institutions within the brewery – breweries such as Stone, whose World Bistro & Gardens in California offers such fantastic dishes as garlic, cheddar, and Stone Ruination IPA soup; Stone Pale Ale and garlic stir-fried Brussels sprouts; and Stone Arrogant Bastard battered onion rings. A bit closer to home in

Cooperstown, N.Y., is Brewery Ommegang, whose Belgianthemed café offers such delicious choices as frites with Abbey Ale and cumin ketchup and mustard with Witte Ale and honey or the magnificent Three Philosophers chocolate fondue. These are just some samples of wonderful combinations that can arise from combing beer with food. However, this movement extends far beyond the reaches of brewery restaurants and continues right at home with a vast amount of recipes available to make delightful dishes using your favorite craft beer. If you’re confused about where to start, you can simply search the Internet or find a wonderful array of cooking with beer cookbooks now available, such as “The Best of American Food & Beer,” “The Craft of Stone Brewing Co.,” or “The American Craft Beer Cookbook.” These are all great starting points to get cooking and contain a great abundance of general information about beer as well. When creating dishes, there are a few things to keep in mind, but as with all cooking, experimentation is not only suggested, it is required. One basic thing to keep in mind, though, is to keep like flavors with like flavors; that is if you are looking to create a dish with spices, try using a beer with such a profile, like an IPA, or if you want a more chocolate base, say for a des-

A great pumpkin sert, a stout or a porter are the perfect starting points. Now of course there are exceptions to these, but for a base point to start from, these ideas work best until you become more acclimated to cooking with beer. Another great tip is to use darker beer with red meat and lighter beers with lighter meats; a similar opinion falls true for cooking with wine as well. However, cooking a hamburger made with grass-fed beef and mixed with an imperial stout will trump anything that red wine could do in that situation. So, are you ready to get adventurous now and get cooking? Well, in keeping with the impending fall season and with the endless amount of pumpkin beers available to us now, I listed several recipes on my blog, idtapthat.org, using pumpkin ale as the beer base. Recipes such as pumpkin cheesecake, pumpkin beer bread, and pumpkin ale cinnamon rolls are all listed and just waiting for you to give them a try. While food and beer have long had a lovely relationship with one another, this new foodie dimension that has been added to this relationship has truly opened some tasty doors into new frontiers for cooking. So get into your kitchen and get cooking – just don’t drink all your ingredients before you ﬁnish! W

Log on to idtapthat.org for some creative fall recipes using pumpkin beers.

Brewer: Terrapin Beer Company Beer: Pumpkinfest Style: Fruit/Vegetable Beer ABV: 6.10% Description: Terrapin Pumpkinfest pours a dark amber color with a thick creamy beige head that leaves a very thick lacing on the glass. The aroma is very enjoyable and alluring, just what you would want from a pumpkin beer. The spices dominate the nose, especially cinnamon up front, and that wonderful fresh pumpkin pie aroma cuts right through with just a hint of sweet malt. The palate is also dominated by the spices up front before being washed over with Munich malts that bring about thoughts of a lovely Oktoberfest beer, blending with bready and caramel malts. The beer ﬁnishes long and dry with the spices lingering on the palate. The body of the beer leans toward the medium side of the spectrum with a moderate amount of carbonation – a very nice balance. This is a well-balanced pumpkin beer that does not overdo with the spices and has an excellent malt selection to give the beer a nice body – a very enjoyable fall beer. Food pairing: The richness and sweet malty balance of this beer makes it a perfect pairing for rich and hearty foods that are great in the cooler months. Pumpkinfest is a perfect pairing with a rich and hearty beef stew; the beer is perfect for highlighting the tender meat sweetness. This beer also pairs very well with many German dishes and is at home with any pork dish, with a malt backbone that brings out the caramel ﬂavors of the meat but enough heft and carbonation to cleanse the palate and leave behind a nice balance of spices.

However, Pumpkinfest also finds a very happy partner with roast chicken. Also, feel free to try with rich desserts such as carrot cake or, of course, some warm pumpkin pie or pumpkin bread. Pumpkinfest is also a fantastic beer to have on hand to cook many dishes with, so get out there and be adventurous! The final word: Terrapin Pumpkinfest is certainly a pumpkin beer worth a taste. In a market that is beyond saturated by pumpkin beers that tend towards being overspiced, it is nice to find one that is very nicely balanced and actually pulls in some Oktoberfest inspiration. Terrapin is a brewery that consistently brews high-quality beers, and Pumpkinfest is no different. The only major com-

plaint is that Pumpkinfest is sold in four-packs, as a nice six-pack of this one would make the beer even better. So be sure to pick some up this fall season and enjoy this beer while breathing in that lovely autumn air. Rating: W W W V Where can I get it? Currently available in bottles at: Wegmans, Dickson City; J & H Beer, WilkesBarre; Goldstein’s Deli, Kingston; and Krugel’s Georgetown Deli & Beer, Wilkes-Barre. Remember, enjoy responsibly! Cheers! -Derek Warren is a beer fanatic, avid homebrewer, and beer historian. Follow Derek’s beer blog at idtapthat.org. W

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

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WEEKENDER, WEDNESDAY,SEPTEMBER18,2013

PAGE 42

LOOK WHAT YOU MISSED

Floodwood @ River Street Jazz Cafe • 09.12.13 Photos by Tammy Heid • For more photos, visit theweekender.com

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

NEPA INDIE WRESTLING SPOTLIGHT Bill Thomas | Weekender Correspondent

“Banger” Ritch Howe jumped off the turnbuckle for the last time on Friday, Sept. 6. The ring shook as he hit his opponent with his signature top rope leg drop. One pin and three seconds later, Howe’s 14-year career as a professional wrestler was over. Prior to the Orang-K Pro Wrestling show that signaled the end, Howe looked back to the beginning. “I sent a letter to (World Championship Wrestling) when I was about 17,” Howe, now 33, said. “WCW was the biggest thing at the time. I didn’t have any delusions that they’d say, ‘Oh, come work for us at 17 with no experience.’ I was just hoping I’d hear something back because otherwise I had no idea what to do. I didn’t even know how to get started.” To Howe’s surprise, he actually did hear back from WCW. A letter directed him to the company’s in-house training school. Shortly after that, however, Howe learned his ﬁrst son was on the way and hung up

Bye bye,Banger

his squared circle dreams in order to take care of his newly expanding family. Nevertheless, when underground wrestling came to Pennsylvania in the mid-‘90s with the formation of Valley Championship Wrestling, it wasn’t long before Howe found himself in the mix. Inspired by VCW’s self-trained brawlers, Howe’s dreams got a new, D.I.Y.-style lease on life. “It was a very long process of ‘Find whoever you can to teach you however much they can,’” Howe said. “After 14 years, I ﬁgured out there is no way to ‘be trained.’ You have to condition yourself to always be learning. You don’t stop.” Since then, there have been few local promotions Howe hasn’t worked with, and more than a few he started himself. He’s played major roles both in the ring and behind the scenes of such groups as Pride of Wrestling, Action Unlimited: Anthracite Wrestling, Keystone State Wrestling, and, most recently, Orang-K Pro Wrestling

(which he continues to be a backer of). One experience Howe remembers fondly saw him team with WWF superstar Stevie Richards against two other WWF superstars, Road Dogg and Billy Gunn, for the main event of a Championship Pro Wrestling show. Exposure matches such as that one allowed Howe to make a name for himself and wrestle for other promotions around the country. Still, it all begins to take its toll over time. “It just clicked in my head: I’m done,” Howe said, grateful he was able to bounce back from a knee injury suffered earlier this year that could have been much worse. “I took up surﬁng last summer. I did a lot of surfing this summer, and I want to be able to do more next summer. I did the wrestling thing; I did what I wanted to do. I want to be able to do other things. So many people get out of the business because they’re injured. I’m not injured. That’s why I

want to get out now.” Recently married, Howe’s retirement isn’t just a gift to himself, but to his family as well. Back to Howe’s last match: In the middle of the ring, the retiring Banger sat down and untied his wrestling boots. Then he grabbed a mic. “Thank you for letting me do this for as long as I’ve done it,” Howe said. “I’ve headlined shows. I didn’t deserve that. I was KSW heavyweight champion. I didn’t deserve that either. I’m just a kid from WilkesBarre who likes wrestling.” Howe invited his son, Matt, into the ring and handed the boy his boots. Reﬂecting on his long career entertaining “other dads’ kids,” Howe ended his speech simply. “Dad’s coming home,” he said, “and dad’s staying home.” Until next time, remember: When fact is stranger than ﬁction, wrestling is at least as real as anything else. W

Name: Kyle Hamilton Town: Sweet Valley HoW To eNTeR: e-mail a photo of your tattoo (at least 200 dpi) with your full name, address and phone number to weekender@theweekender.com to enter our weekly contest. each month, Weekender readers vote for their favorite, and the winner receives a $75 gift certificate to marc’s tattooing. must be 18 to participate

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Page 43

Photos by mark griffin

‘Banger’ Ritch Howe ended his 14-year career as a professional wrestler on Sept. 6.

WEEKENDER, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2013

Building / Construction / Skilled

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$ BUYING $ JUNK CARS & TRUCKS Highest Prices Paid Free Pickup CA$H PAID 570-288-8995 Yard Sale WILKES-BARRE Unity of NEPA 140 140 S. Grant Street (Parking off of Bethel) Amazing Bag Sale Sept. 20-21 Fri., 9-6, Sat., 9-3 Clothing, shoes, books, kitchen and more. Some items individually priced. The rest get bagged. Bags provided. Friday AM bags start at $5 by Sat PM bags are $1. Money To Lend “We can erase your bad credit 100% GUARANTEED.” Attorneys for the Federal Trade Commission say theyʼve never seen a legitimate credit repair operation. No one can legally remove accurate and timely information from your credit report. Itʼs a process that starts with you and involves time and a conscious effort to pay your debts. Learn about managing credit and debt at ftc. gov/credit. A message from The Times Leader and the FTC.

Immediate openings for FORKLIFT OPERATORS/ORDER PICKERS 2nd shift in the Center Point Industrial Park, Pittston.

Installation / Maintenace / Repair p Will have OPE factory training on motors, transmissions, hydraulics, electrical, pneumatics or other components. Must have your own tools. Call Brian at Harvis HR Service 570542-5330 or send resume to: hilbertsequipment.jobs @gmail.com

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80099530

PAGE 44

Special Notices

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Building & Remodeling

PAGE 45

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WEEKENDER, WEDNESDAY,SEPTEMBER18,201

AGE 46

VIDEO GAME REVIEWS

Robbie Vanderveken | Special to the Weekender

The Top 5 zombie games of 2013 Every since 1968’s “Night of the Living Dead,” people have been obsessive with zombies. They have definitely shambled into all aspects of pop culture, from movies to comic books, and especially into video games. There isn’t just one type of zombie out there: there is the classic slow and shambling zombies, the fast and aggressive zombies, and the walking dead variety, which respond to smells and sound. Just like these types of zombies, there are several different types of zombie games. This year has been huge for zombie games. Here is a short list of the top five zombie games of 2013 that you have to try if you are an undead fanatic. 5. ‘Dead Island: Riptide’ “Dead Island: Riptide” is the sequel to the original “Dead Island” and is an interesting mix of first-person action and RPG. “Riptide” continues the story of the survivors as they try to escape an island chain called Banoi after being shipwrecked. “Riptide” features new characters, vehicles, changing weather conditions, new weapons, and some different types of zombies. “Riptide” was a fun game where you could explore and dismember zombies with a group of friends; it was a bit buggy and had pretty much no story, but it was definitely an entertaining and gory zombie game. 4. ‘State of Decay’ Just like “Dead Island,” this is a open world survival game. What makes “SoD” interesting is it strives to be more realistic; it’s like a zombie apocalypse simulation. A big part of this game is meeting other survivors and building a community. This isn’t an action-packed game; it isn’t about killing zombies – it’s about surviving. You have to build a base, get food, and scav-

enge for supplies while staying alive. If your character dies, he is dead, you lose your gear, your home, and everything. You can’t just load a save, so this really creates an emotional attachment. Just like last year’s “Walking Dead” game from Telltale, the choices you make drastically change the game and how other survivors will act around you. One of the best parts of this game is you can customize your outpost; you can have towers, gardens, storage, and extra security barricades. Players will have a great time setting up their home and deciding how “you” would set up your house to survive the undead. This is one of the best zombie games out there because of how realistic it can be. It is a real test of your survival skills. 3. ‘ZombiU’ A launch game for the new Wii system, “ZombiU” is an interesting and scary experience. Just like “State of Decay,” if you die, you start over. You have to ﬁnd yourself as a zombie and kill it to recover your gear; this adds a huge sense of urgency to stay alive. What makes this game so cool is the two-screen experience of the Wii U; you can use the touch screen as a map or to control your inventory, and for all sorts of other

tools, such as hacking. This is special because while you are using the touch pad, you can still be attacked on your TV, so you have to keep checking the TV screen to see if you are being attacked. It leads to some really intense scary scenes. It is a must-play showcase of the touch screen on the Wii U for zombie fans. 2. ‘The Last of Us’ This is not only one of the best zombie games, but one of the best games period. The protagonists aren’t really zombies; they are called the infected, but they share a lot of similarities with zombies. The game focuses on two survivors, Joel and Ellie, as they travel across an America that has been devastated by the outbreak of a virus that turns people into zombie type creatures. The real threat to these travelers, though, is the non-infected. Resources are limited and everyone is out to take them from you, as is the government, which is trying to contain the outbreak. “The Last of Us” looks amazing, and as one of the best and most heart-wrenching experiences ever, it is a must-play for every PS3 owner. 1. ‘The Walking Dead: 400 Days’ Last year’s Telltale’s “The Walking Dead” was nothing short of a masterpiece.

It not only changed what people thought of zombie games, but also changed storytelling in games altogether. It isn’t an action game; it’s a point-and-click adventure game, and it’s all about story. Nearly everything you do in the game changes what non-playable characters think of you and the outcome of the game. “400 Days” is the followup to original and is made to bridge the gap between season one and the highly anticipated season two. “400 Days” tells the story of ﬁve new characters each having different stories based on “The Walking Dead” comic books. It’s not as compelling as Lee and Clementine’s story, but it does tell a very emotional narrative and expands the conventions of the last game by adding more interactions with surroundings and more timed responses, which impact the story. Another interesting change is the ability to switch between the other character’s story at any time. It doesn’t have the impact of the main game, but it is a great way to hold you over until season two comes out. -Robbie Vanderveken is the digital operations specialist at The Times Leader. E-mail him at rvanderveken@timesleader.com. W

RIDE OF THE WEEK

Michael Golubiewski | Special to the Weekender

2005 FORD MUSTANG GT

Owner:

Jeff Albright Forest City

“I’ve been taking this car to shows almost since the day I bought it,” Albright said. “On top of that, I’ve put almost $13K in improvements into it: under the hood, in the interior, trying to make it a real performance Mustang.” W

To submit your vehicle, email: mgolubiewski@theweekender.com

Justin Brown | Weekender Correspondent

The importance of being earnest

together. “All because of you!” “We asked for a tour. They said no,” one explained. “However,” began his buddy, “I said we need to do whatever it takes like Justin would!” They went into further detail by telling me they borrowed a guitar from a performer on the Venice Beach boardwalk and started playing a song outside about why theChive should let them in - until they came outside and actually did. That enthusiasm was matched with the members of the development team I met with the following day at my pitch meeting! They loved it. After discussing it with the rest of their development team, I received an e-mail back. “We just adore you!” the e-mail read.

Then, it said they were so sad to inform me that they had to pass. “It borders on too earnest,” the e-mail noted, “which can be deadly when selling a show.” I was never called “too earnest” before, and it confused the hell out of me. I felt defeated and stopped focusing on my dream. “You know the difference between winners and losers?” I was recently asked. “Nothing! Both fail. Winners just get back up.” So, for all dreamers, the believers, the doers, the twerkers with their heads in the clouds and their asses bent over on the dance floor: be reckless, be earnest, be yourself, and follow your dreams. I’m going to. Third pitch is the charm, right? W

Weekender Wire Services

HAPPINESS IS A CLEAN TOILET beginning in 2011, about three dozen people in tokyo have been meeting every sunday morning at 6 a.m. on a mission to scrub down, one by one, the city’s grungiest public rest rooms. “by 7:30,” according to an associated Press reporter who witnessed an outing in august, the team had left behind a “gleaming public toilet, looking as good as the day it was installed.” explained the hygiene- intense satoshi Oda (during the week, a computer programmer), the mission is “for our own good” — work that leader masayuki magome compares to the training that buddhist monks receive to find peace. (In fact, to fulfill the group’s motto, “Clean thyself by cleaning cubicles,” the scouring must be done with bare hands.) a squad supporter spoke of a sad, growing apprehension that the younger generation no longer shares the Japanese cultural conviction that rest rooms should always be clean and safe. MEDICAL MARVELS Colleagues were stunned in may when abC news editor don ennis suddenly appeared at work wearing a little black dress and a red wig and declaring that he had begun hormone therapy and wanted to be called dawn ennis. as co-workers accommodated his wishes (which did not seem so unusual in contemporary professional society), ennis began to have second thoughts, and by July had blamed his conversion on “transient global amnesia,” brought on by marital difficulties, and had returned to work as don. apparently the primary lingering effect is that he must still deal with dawn’s hormone-induced breasts. THE ENTREPRENEURIAL SPIRIT — researchers at the University of tokyo have developed a mirror that makes a person appear happy even when not. a built-in camera tracks facial features in real time, then tweaks the image to turn up the corners of the mouth and to create the beginnings of a smile in the eyes. Of what practical use would such a mirror be? Other Japanese researchers, according to a slate.com report in august, believe that happyface mirrors in retail stores would improve shoppers’ dispositions and lead to more sales. — a home ownership boom in China has led to heavily attended housing fairs, in which builders compete

PEOPLE WITH ISSUES John Anderson, the town administrator of Derry, N.H. (pop. 34,000), was accused by police in August of indecent exposure and lewdness after, naked, inviting a DirecTV salesman into his home and performing unspecified conduct in front of the man. Anderson was previously town manager of Boothbay Harbor, Maine. zealously to sell their homes, leading to offbeat schemes to draw attention. among the latest, according to China daily, is one that dresses female models in bare-backed evening wear, with sample floor plans and other housing information painted onto their skin, and sends them wandering through the crowds. ANIMALS GONE WILD — syFy Channel’s recent original movie “sharknado” briefly became a media sensation in July with a storyline involving large schools of oversized sharks lifted from the ocean by waterspouts and deposited, alive (and angry!) on land to wreak havoc. but as the website mother nature news subsequently reported, animals actually have been lifted to land in that fashion in the past. Previous documented news reports of the phenomenon include airborne fish (mudfish in the Philippines, perch in australia); frogs (in Odzaci, serbia, in 2005); jellyfish (bath, england, in 1894); worms (Jennings, La., in 2007); and, according to an 1887 new york times story, eight alligators in silverton township, s.C. — two macaques escaped from the straussberg adventure Park in eastern germany in July, apparently on the run from the jealous bullying of “Cornelius,” the resident alpha male. When park officials recaptured the two, they reported that (even though everyone seems to be against “bullying” these days) “Fred” and “richard” would have to be castrated. It was not punishment, the officials explained; it was to calm them and reduce the overall “hormone imbalance” in the park, since males greatly outnumber females. PERSPECTIVE the Costa rican government announced recently that it would close all its zoos, effective march 2014, and free animals either to the wild or to safe “retirement” shelters. since the country is known

for its expansive biodiversity (500,000 unique organisms, despite occupying barely more than 1/100th of 1 percent of earth’s area), it is time, the environment minister said, to allow the organisms to interact instead of imprisoning them. Costa rica is also one of only four countries to ban the exploitation of dolphins. LEADING ECONOMIC INDICATORS — In July, following sustained criticism, thomson reuters business information company suspended an advance-release service for the crucial monthly “consumer confidence index” that has been known to signal stock markets to abruptly “buy” (driving up prices) or “sell” (sending them lower). the University of michigan prepares and distributes the index promptly at 10 a.m. eastern time on its release date, but thomson reuters offers two advance peeks. It pays the school about $1 million a year to see the index at 9:55 a.m., to share with its best customers. the suspended program gave an even earlier tip-off — at 9:54:58 — and high-frequency trading firms paid $6,000 more a month for those two seconds, which allowed their computer robots to execute hundreds of thousands of trades before other professional traders had access to the index. — First-World Problems: self-indulgent new york City parents have been hiring “play-date” coaches for their preschool youngsters, apparently out of fear that the kids’ skill set for just having fun might not impress admissions officers at the city’s elite private schools. the CeO of one consulting outfit told the new york Post in July that $400 an hour gets expert monitoring of a 4-year-old in small groups, evaluating, for example, how the child colors in a book, shares the crayons, holds a pencil and follows the rules of simon says. W

Page 47

My best friend from college had a baby last week. On the same day, I had a hangover. Both the baby and I had to be held and suck on a boob before we stopped crying. I guess, when I really think about it, we were crying for the same reasons. Neither one of us were where we wanted to be. The baby wanted to be curled up in a uterus, and I wanted to be living anywhere other than my parents’ house. “How long do you plan on staying here?” badgered my mother as I hauled my hungover ass to the kitchen for some remedying pickle juice and Tylenol to cure the aftermath of my poor decisions from the night before. “You say you want your own TV show,” she continued, her eyes still glued to a basement makeover on HGTV. “Go get one! You’re not going to be on TV by managing a bar and living in Carbondale! Besides, I could use the space.” I actually kicked off my summer by presenting my second television pitch to a major production company in Los Angeles! I was certain that my idea for a show called “Whatever It Takes,” which would follow me coaching and inspiring the Millenial generation to go above and beyond to reach their goals, would be a smash! As someone who brought a marching band to apply for a job, who better to create and host a show like that? I could see, feel, and even taste the impact this show would have if it were picked up. When I met a group of filmmakers during my stay in Cali, my vision was even more solidified. “We got a private tour inside theChive office today!” they screamed when they saw me at the hostel we were staying at

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Agenda From page 50 Wilkes-barre.$15,general admission; $12,seniors andWVIa members; $7,students; free,children 12 and under. Cal Verduchi,Joe Eichler and Father Paul Comedy Show: sept.21,9 p.m.,the Caverna (602 Church st.,Jessup).$14,advance. seating first come first serve. Chicory House and Folklore Society (www.folkloresociety.org, 570.333.4007) • Community Contra Dance: Oct.5, 7 p.m.,Church of Christ Uniting (776 market st.,Kingston).$9,adults; reduced admission for families. The Commonwealth Medical College (525 pine st.,scranton, 570.504.7000, thecommonwealthmedical.com) •Annual golf tournament: Sept.30, Huntsville golf Club,shavertown. registration and breakfast begins 9 a.m.,shotgun start at 10.$300, per golfer; $1,200,foursome. For more info call 570.504.9650 or to register online,go to www. thecommonwealthmedical.com/ golf . • FifthAnnual Gala: Oct.19,6 p.m., scranton Cultural Center. Dietrich Theater (60 e.tioga street,tunkhannock, 570.996.1500,www.dietrichtheater. com). • Fall 2013 Film Festival Oktoberfest Opening Night Gala: Sept.20,doors 5:30 p.m.$35. • Fall 2013 Film Festival: Sept.20Oct.3.$9,evening (after 6 p.m.); $8, matinee (before 6 p.m.). • Fall 2013 Film Festival Post-Festival Discussion: Oct.4,1 p.m. • Open Mic Night: Sept.27,doors 6:30,open mic at 7. • 19th CenturyAppliqued Quilts… AnAmericanTradition: Oct.5,11 a.m.$5. • Guitar Music of SouthAmerica: Oct.6,3 p.m. • Dietrich Classic Movie Series:‘The King and I’: Oct.9,1 and 7 p.m.,$5. • Fall FoliageTrip to GreyTowers, Dingman’s Ferry & Milford: Oct.12. bus departs 8 a.m.,returns 6 p.m. $100. • DoYou RememberThis…Music for the movies from silents to the 1960s: Oct.13,bus departs 1:30 p.m.,concert atWVIamedia Center 3 p.m.Free. •The Magic of Bill Dickson: Oct.19, 11 a.m. • Open Mic Night: Oct.25,7 p.m., feature at 8:15. • Sing! Sing! Sing!: Oct.26,11 a.m. Glass—wine.bar.kitchen. at Ledges Hotel (119 Fallsave,Hawley.570.226.1337, www.ledgeshotel.com/glass-winebar-bistro/) • Live Music with Eric Rudy andJen Kiesendahl: Sept.20,8-11 p.m . • Live Music with Kevin Campion: sept.27,8-11 p.m. The Greater Scranton Chamber of Commerce (222 mulberry st.,scranton) • SeptemberWomen’s Network Luncheon: Sept.18,noon. • Chamber Day at Roba Family Farms: Sept.22,10 a.m. Irem Clubhouse (64 ridgeway drive,dallas) • FluVaccination clinic: Oct.1,9 a.m.-noon.register and pick up

a registration form in the Irem Clubhouse Business Office by Sept. 26.you must complete and return the form in advance or bring it with you on Oct.1.You will need your medicare or health insurance card when returning the registration form. If you do not have health insurance, the cost is $25.99.Influenza vaccines are provided byWalgreens. • Octoberfest: Oct.4,11 a.m.-2 p.m. Jessup Art Walk: second saturday of every month. For more info visit jessupartwalk.info or email info@jessupartwalk.info. Justus Volunteer Fire Co. (159 Fieldstone dr.,scotttwp., 570.587.4545) “Keep Wine-ing, He Might Start to Look Like Prince Charming” withauthor/ComedianJeannine M Luby,Sept.26,7 p.m.,III Ponds Winery,Dalton.Special guest Liz russo.$16,advance tickets at JeannineLuby.com. King’s College (133 north river st.,Wilkes-barre, 570.208.5957 or kings.edu) •ThirdAnnual King’s College Diversity Film Festival: Sept.18,25, Oct.2,7 p.m.,BurkeAuditorium. • Film Screening:“Eyes on the Prize – No EasyWalk”: Sept.25,7 p.m., burkeauditorium. • Barbara Sabol Memorial Lecture: sept.26,7 p.m.burkeauditorium. • Film Screening:“Glory”: Oct.2,7 p.m.,burkeauditorium. • Feast of Saint Francis Lecture: Oct. 3,7 p.m.,burkeauditorium. • St.Bernardine’s Gospel Choir: Oct. 26,7:30 p.m.; Liturgy Oct.27,11 a.m. •Things that Go BOOM in the Night!: Oct.29,7 p.m.,BurkeAuditorium. Lackawanna College (501Vine st.,scranton, 1.877.346.3552,lackawanna.edu) environmental Institute (10 moffat dr.,Covingtontwp.) •Art Opening:Works from“The Studio”: Sept.20,5-7 p.m.Through nov.1. • NaturalWonders: Fall Harvest: Sept.26,1-2:30 p.m.,and every thursday through dec.5.ages 3 to 5.$40,six classes.pre-registration required.Registration limited. • Getting to the Core,program on tree aging: Oct.1,5:30-7:30p.m. ages 7 and up.$5.pre-registration required. •Art in Nature: Bird SeedWreath: Oct.12,9 a.m.-noon.$25.Preregistration required. • Bears in your Backyard: Oct.15,6-8 p.m.$5.Pre-registration required. •WolfVisions: Oct.26,6-7:30 p.m. geared for children and families.$5. Pre-registration required. Misericordia University •MercyWeek 2013: Sept.22-28. Mass,Sept.22,7 p.m.; Liturgy,Sept. 24,12:05 p.m.followed by Mercy Week prayer around the peace pole in campus quadrangle at 12:30; service Fair,sept.25,11 a.m.-1 p.m.; “Stuff the Bus”charity event,Sept. 26,11 a.m.-1 p.m.For more info call 570.674.1483. • Open house: Sept.28,registration 9 a.m. •Annual Health Care Lecture Series “The Future of Health Care in the United States,’’by Susan Dentzer: Oct.4,7:45 a.m.,Dudrick,Muth, Huntzinger,andaldentrust rooms of sandy and marlene Insalaco Hall. Registration required.

• Interactive cooking demo and presentation by Father Leo patalinghug,who appeared on “Throw Down!With Bobby Flay”: nov.14,7 p.m.,Huntzinger andalden trust rooms,sandy and marlene Insalaco Hall. Ninth Annual Fall Intertribal Powwow • Sept.28-29,10 a.m.-6 p.m., noxen Fire Co.grounds (3493 stull road,noxen).For more information contact natalie “Wisteria”at 570.947.2097 or email wisteria18704@yahoo.com. North Pocono Cultural Society • Harmonic Brass of Munich, Germany: Sept.23,7 p.m.,Saint Catherine’s Catholic Church (220 Church st.,moscow).$8 per person; $15 for two. 76 University drive ,Hazleton, 570.450.3000,www.hn.psu.edu) Penn State Wilkes-Barre (Rte.115,Lehman,570.675.2171, wb.psu.edu) •“Five Great Films,Five Great Genres:”Thursday evenings beginning Sept.26 through Oct. 24,rCtheatersWilkes-barre. pre-film lecture notes and post-film discussion will accompany each screening.Films include“Airplane!”, “On Golden Pond”,“Raiders of the LostArk”,“The Day the Earth Stood Still”,and“High Noon”. Friends of Salt Springs Park (PO Box 541,Montrose. 570.967.7275,info@ friendsofsaltspringspark.org.) • Movie Night: Oct.5,7 p.m.Nov.2, 7 p.m. • Pictures in the Park: Look atThose Leaves!: Oct.6,2 p.m.-5 p.m. • Game on!: Oct.11,Nov.8,7 p.m.8:30 p.m. • Bats! Oh My!: Oct.18,7 p.m. • Full Moon Hike: Oct.19,5:30 p.m.7:30 p.m. • Halloween Fest: Oct.26,4 p.m.9:30 p.m. •Take a Step Back inThyme: Nov.3, 1 p.m.-3 p.m. Scranton Cultural Center (420 n.Washingtonave., scranton,570.346.7369, scrantonculturalcenter.org) • Bad MovieThursday: Sept.19,7 p.m.$10 Settlers Inn •Live Music in the Dining Room with dan bradley.sept.21,6-9 p.m.; sept. 28,6-9 p.m. Unity of NEPA: A Spiritual Center (140 s.grant st.,Wilkes-barre. 570.824.7722.) •“How to Pray to GodWithout Talking”prayer class: Sept.18,11:30 a.m.post-service. •TheAmazing Bag Sale: Sept.20,9 a.m.-6 p.m.; sept.21,9 a.m.-3 p.m. • Hip Sip Coffee House Series 80s Karaoke Night: Sept.28,6:30 p.m. •Special Guest Speaker - Rev.Ann Marie: Sept.29,10 a.m.service. Waverly Community House (1115 n.abington rd.,Waverly, waverlycomm.org) • Basketball clinics: Beginning Sept. 17,six weeks everytuesday from 3:30-5 p.m.Boys and girls ages 6 to 9.beginning sept.19,six weeks everyThursday from 3:30-5 p.m. boys and girls in grade 4 through 6. $60 per participant or $12 per class. • Baby Signs ParentWorkshop: Sept. 19,7-8:30 p.m.$55 per individual or couple.For more information

or to print a registration form,visit www.waverlycomm.org or call the 570.586.8191,extension 2. • Ballroom Dancing lessons: Session 1,Wednesday evenings beginning sept.11,6-7 p.m.,advanced, americantango; 7-8 p.m.,beginners, Cha Cha and rumba; session 2, Wednesday evenings Oct.23,30, nov.13,20,dec.4,continuation of session 1 classes for those who completed it.$45 per person for each five-week session.advanced registration required.To register call JillWetzel at 570.954.1147 or email her at jgwetzel@epix.net. •“World Music Drumming”,program for special needs children: Begins Sept.11,3:45-4:30 p.m.for children K through 2nd grade,4:30-5:15 p.m. for 3rd through 12th grade.$95, each ten-week session. • Community Pledge ofAllegiance: Sept.11,9:30 a.m.,flagpole on the front lawn. • Learn Italian:Tuesdays,starting Oct.1.Session 1― Basic Italian: 6-7:15 p.m.; Session 2 ― Intro to Conversational Italian (for advanced beginners),7:30-8:45 p.m.$120, eight-week session,includes materials. Children and teen etiquette classes: •“How to Say it Best”: Sept.28, 10-11:30 a.m.Ages 4-7.$30. •“The Communication Connection”: sept.28,noon-2 p.m.ages 8-14.$35. •“Say Please,SayThankYou”: Oct. 12,10-11:30 a.m.Ages 4-7.$30. •“Common Courtesies Count”: Oct. 12,noon-2 p.m.ages 8-14.$35. •“Pass the Peas,Please”: Nov.16, 10-11:30 a.m.Ages 4-7.$35. •“Dining Boot Camp for Kids”: Nov. 16,noon-2 p.m.ages 8-14.$35. •“Great Events”: Dec.21,10-11:30 a.m.ages 4-7.$30. •“Great Events”: Dec.21,noon-2 p.m.ages 8-14.$30. West Side Career and Technology Center SkillsUSAAnnual Fall Craft Fair: Oct.5,10 a.m.-3 p.m. Wilkes University (84W.south st,Wilkes-barre,1.800. WILKES.U,wilkes.edu) • Family Business Forum events by financial advisor Franco Lombardo: “The GreatWhite Elephant of Money,” Sept.18,5-7:30 p.m.,Hawk Lecture Hall in Business Building, and Sept.19,5-7:30 p.m.,Henry student Center ballroom. LOCAL HISTORY Eckley Miners’Village (located nine miles east of Hazleton, just off route 940; 570.636.2070; www.eckleyminers.org) • Monthly volunteer meeting: Sept. 14. •Traditional music festival: Sept.15, gate opens noon. •Walking tours: Monday through saturday,9am-5pm.sunday, noon-5pm. • Haunted LanternTours: Oct.11-12, 18-19,25-26.6:30 p.m.Children 6-12yrs $5,adults 13+ $10. Everhart Museum: 1901 mulberry st.,scranton, 570.346.7186,www.everhartmuseum.org • Farm toTable: Sept.20,6:30 p.m.10:30 p.m. Lackawanna Historical Society (the Catlin House,232 monroe avenue,scranton,570.344.3841.) • Haunted Scranton andTrolley

ofTerror tours: Sept.13-14,20-21. $25,society members; $30,nonmembers. •Annual Dinner: Oct.12,5 p.m., Century Club (612Jeffersonave., scranton).$45,members; $50,nonmembers.Reservations required by Oct.8. Old Jail Museum (128W.broadway,Jim thorpe.570.325.5259.www. TheOldJailMuseum.com.) TOURS:Through Labor Day,daily (closedWednesday),noon to 4:30 p.m.$6,adult; $5,senior over 65 and high school; $4,children ages 6-12; free,children under 5. LEARNING Dietrich Theater (tunkhannock) Children’s Classes •Art Explorers Camp forAges 5 – 8: Oct.11,18,25,Nov.1,4-5:30 p.m. $40. •Art Explorers Camp forAges 9 – 12: Oct.10,17,24,31,4-5:30 p.m.$40. • PreschoolArt Explorers: Oct.10,17, 24,31,10-10:45 a.m.Free. • Preschool Pottery & Sculpture for ages 4 and 5: Series 2,Nov.7,14,21, Dec.5,10-10:45 a.m.Free. • Quilting for Kids:Tumbling Blocks: Wednesdays sept.11 through dec. 11,3:30-5 p.m.Ages 6 and up.$6 per class,fabric is free. • Sidewalk Surfing:TheArt & Culture of Skateboarding: Oct.1,8,15,22,29, 4-5:30 p.m.Ages 5 to 12.Free. • SingYour Heart Out: Oct.,26,Nov. 2,9,16,23,10 a.m.-noon.ages 8 to 13.$50. •WritingYour Hat Off: Creative Writing for Kids: Oct.2,9,16,23,30, Nov.6,4-5:30 p.m.Ages 10 to 16. Free. Intergenerational Classes • Open Studio & Portfolio Prep: Series 2: Oct.8,15,22,29,7-8:30 p.m.; Series 3: Nov.5,12,19,26, 7-8:30 p.m.Ages 13 and up.$15,per class; $60,series of four classes. • Quilting for Everyone:Tumbling Blocks:Wednesdays,Sept.11-Dec.11, 6-7:30 p.m.Ages 13 and up.$6 per class,fabric is free. Classes foradults • Basic Knitting: Oct.29,Nov.5,7 p.m.ages 16 and up.$30. • Decorative Painting: Oct.16,23,30, nov.6,13,20,dec.4,11,18,noon-3 p.m.ages 16 and up.$20 per class plus cost of painting surface. • Design a Painted Silk Scarf: Oct.8, 7 p.m.ages 16 and up.$35. • Golden Days of Radio Players: Oct. 22,29,nov.5,12,19,26,dec.3,7-9 p.m.ages 18 and up.Free. • Introduction to ResinJewelry: Oct. 14,6-9 p.m.ages 16 and up.$35. • Introduction to Stained Glass: Oct. 21,6-9 p.m.ages 16 and up.$60. •Jewelry Making: Kumihimo Beading: Oct.16,23,Nov.6,7-9 p.m. ages 16 and up.$75. • KundaliniYoga: Series 1: Sept.30, Oct.7,14,21,5:30-7 p.m.; Series 2: Oct.28,Nov.4,11,18,5:30-7 p.m. ages 16 and up.$40,four classes; $15,drop-in. • Nia: Series 1: Sept.10,17,Oct.1,8, 5:30-6:30 p.m.; Series 2: Oct.15,22, 29,Nov.5,5:30-6:30 p.m.; Series 3: Nov.12,19,Dec.3,10,5:30-6:30 p.m. ages 16 and up.$40,four classes; $10,drop-in. • Nutrition forWomen: Oct.3,10,17, 24,7-8:30 p.m.Ages 16 and up.Free. • Recycled GlassArtwork: Series 1:

send your listings to WbWnews@ civitasmedia.com, 90 e. market st., Wilkes-barre, pa., 18703, or fax to 570.831.7375. deadline is mondays at 2 p.m. print listings occur up until three weeks from publication date.

Sept.9,16,23,30,7-8:30 p.m.; Series 2: Oct.7,14,21,28,7-8:30 p.m.; Series 3: Nov.4,11,18,25,7-8:30 p.m.ages 18 and up.$65,four class series,students supply own safety glasses. • SimplyYoga: Series 1: Sept.4,11, 18,25,Oct.2,9,10-11:15 a.m.; Series 2: Oct.16,23,30,Nov.6,13,20, 10-11:15 a.m.Ages 16 and up.$60,six consecutive classes; $15,drop-in. •Writers’Group:Thursdays,7-8:30 p.m.ages 18 and up. •Yoga for the Guardians ofYour Health: Sept.23,5:30-7 p.m.Ages 16 and up.Free,donations Endless Mountains Zendo (104 Hollow road,stillwater. 570.925.5077,endless@epix.net) •Zen MeditationTraining Introductory: Sept.28,9:30 a.m.3:30 p.m.Open donation basket,$10 for lunch and snack. Freestyle hand drumming held every month on the second and fourth saturdays at everything natural health food store,426 south state street,Clarks summit.all ages and newcomers welcome.no experience required.Drums and percussion provided.attend anytime between 1:00-4:00PM. Pocono Arts Council (18 n.seventh st.,stroudsburg. 570.476.4460.www.poconoarts.org) • Oil Painting: Sept.19,26,Oct.10,17, 24,31,6:30-8:30 p.m.$72,member; $80,non-member; $60,senior; $65, senior non-member. •Acrylic Painting: Sept.23,30,Oct.7, 14,21,28,9:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m.$85, member; $95,non-member; $65, senior; $70,senior non-member. • DecoupageAKeepsake Box: Sept. 4,11,18,25,1-3 p.m.$72,member; $80,non-member; $60,senior; $65, senior non-member.$10 material fee.all material supplied. • Basic Drawing: Sept.4,11,18,25, 6:30-8:30 p.m.$72,member; $80, non-member; $60,senior; $65, senior non-member. SOCIAL GROUPS Calligrapher’s Guild of Northeastern Pennsylvania Meeting: Sept.20,7:30 p.m., marywood University shields Center forVisualarts room 225.For details call 570.296.6507. Geisinger Wyoming Valley Medical Center Bereavement support group series: everythursday beginningaug.15, 2-3:30 p.m.and 6-7:30 p.m. Nar-Anon Family Group Meetings sun.7 p.m.Clear brook bldg.(rear), Forty Fort;Wed.,7 p.m.United methodist Church,mountaintop. 570.288.9892. Expanded listings at theweekender.com. W

Wednesday, sePtember 18, 2013

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WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 52

By Caeriel Crestin

Weekender Correspondent

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) You’ve probably noticed how vulnerable or receptive towards Geminis you are. There’s a surprising amount of reciprocity there, too. But did you know that you have the perfect BandAid for your favorite Gem’s Achilles’ heel? Luckily for you, they’ve got a similar remedy that will cure your own most tender wound. It might be the kind of thing where you can slap bandages on each other’s sore spots, wish each other well, and go on your merry way. But if you’re at all open to it, I recommend sticking around and seeing what happens next. I have a feeling it’ll be worth your while. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Keep your nose clean, kid. I’m not talking actual boogers; Librans are famously well kempt. I’m referring to, instead, the slightly dirty affairs you’ve been thinking of getting mixed up with, in the name of profit or ego, things you just know, deep down in your gut, aren’t right—for you or anyone else with, like, morals. Don’t sell out, at least not in this way—you’d give up too much and get way too little. Besides, all ethics aside, the kind of public cleaning-up you’d suffer—something like when your Mom whipped a disgusting crumpled tissue out of her purse to blot your mortified six-year-old nose—just isn’t worth it. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) The secret to your popularity, such as it is: you tend to wield just the right amounts of in-the-sack filthiness, and take-home-to-Mom sweetness. It’s a rare combination, and it’s largely responsible for the disproportionate number of head-over-heels admirers you usually garner. Unfortunately, your balance is out of whack right now. You’ve temporarily shifted so far in one direction that you’re attracting all the wrong types: prudish pedants who wish they’d saved themselves for marriage (obviously so inappropriate for you) or malign sluts who can’t be bothered to remember your name (not quite as inapt, but still unsuitable, considering your current standards and circumstances). In general, fervently avoid new entanglements this week, and by all means, if anyone proposes marriage or even a no-strings lay, RUN AWAY. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) Although you can realistically claim to have more energy than anyone you know, it’s important to know what kind of energy you have in abundance. It’s difficult to bridle your shifting flames and ride them marathon distances. Long hauls are much harder for you than short sprints, which, as everyone knows, you rock at. That’s not to say

CELEBRITY BIRTHDAYS Jada Pinkett Smith Sept. 18, 1971 Adam West Sept. 19, 1928 GARY COLE (pictured) Sept. 20, 1956 Stephen King Sept. 21, 1947 Billie Piper Sept. 22, 1982 Ani DiFranco Sept. 23, 1970 Stephani McMahon Sept. 24, 1976 you can’t cover great expanses and even make good time doing it. You just have to take a different approach. What is a long haul, except dozens of short sprints? Break it down into manageable chunks. You may not win the race, but in this case winning isn’t important—what’s important is reaching the finish line. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) You’ve been so hungry for thrills lately that I don’t want to even mention the unspeakable places you’ve been sticking your vibrating cellphone. Unfortunately, you can’t just force excitement to happen. Trying to inject it into your life right now will only result in the psychic equivalent of a heroin addiction and ultimately prevent you from experiencing some of the more legit, healthy, and highquality adventures coming your way soon. Luckily, although this week may contain none of the tumultuous and electrifying ups and downs you’ve been craving, it should provide enough gentle and engaging pleasures that you can keep from indulging in any more embarrassing perversions of modern technology. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) Patience isn’t one of your best virtues, so you can understand all too well when those who are waiting on you start to get antsy and worried. They’re used to your usual instantaneous action. You’ve spoiled them, by creating a world in which things are almost easier done than said. Now, when what you’re working on simply can’t be finished faster than it is, no matter how efficient or dedicated you are, people

are bound to get impatient. Don’t let them rush you, though. Despite their urgency, results really are more important than a record time. And since you rarely do anything half-assed, when they see how well you’ve done, they’ll quickly forget how long it took. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) It’s not like you to plan to wait until the last minute (it just happens), but that’s really what you ought to do right now. That’s because your current objective is more like a short sprint with hurdles than a longdistance marathon. There’s no point in exhausting yourself cramming in additional training now. Either you’ve got what it takes or you don’t, and squeezing in a few extra practice runs will only tire you out and make you less on your game, come the big event. Slack, even though it contradicts your current ambitions. Loaf as if your dreams and hopes depend on it. They do. When it’s time to get off your ass and fly, you’ll know. ARIES (March 21-April 19) Get down on the floor and play with the kids. It’s what you need, to sprawl surrounded by toys and the joyful egotism of a child, and just have fun. Forget the misery of your responsibilities for at least thirty minutes a day all week. If you don’t have a kid on hand to play with, pretend. Buy some Legos and build stuff or indulge in some good old-fashioned crayon art. Your inner child is lost in the big bad woods surrounded by the big bad wolves of your adult world. Find and befriend him or her once again, before s/he gets eaten alive.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) All your mineshafts are depleted. Accept it. You’ve been sending psychic miners down these familiar holes, day after day, and they’re returning empty-handed, or with dead canaries. Face it; you’ve unearthed every last diamond, vein of gold, or even chunk of coal from these exhausted dig sites. It’s time to seal them up well so you don’t lose any kids or puppies down their dark depths, and start exploring new ground. You may have to purchase some mental territory traditionally occupied by your neighbors, but it’s in your nature to annex new land. No need to be ashamed of it, especially considering the good uses you’ll be putting your newfound wealth to, once you figure out where to dig it up from. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) You’ve got a problem; it may not be especially big, but it’s taking up an awful lot of mind space. It’s like one of those painful zits that you just wish you could pop but it’s too deep to get to. Like a pimple, it’s probably better to just leave it alone, at least for now. It’s untouchable. Instead, concentrate on the things you can control, the mental equivalent of eating right and gently cleaning your face with good product. If you’re good about it, you’re predicament will, like a zit, probably just dissolve and disappear on its own. CANCER (June 21-July 22) What you’re trying to do is akin to tearing the hairs off your own head, to weave them into a new shirt to wear. It’s shortsighted; you’ll end up bald with a collar and half a sleeve. Spare yourself the pain and just look beyond the tip of your own nose, darling. The outcome of your current venture is obvious to everyone but you. That’s not to say you should abandon it, necessarily—although that might really be the best option—but you ought to consider at least changing your methods, to ones that could actually work. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) You’re a dwarf with a battle-axe, at once comical and very, very scary. The problem—you’re not used to being laughed at unless you’re the one making the joke. Still, it’s all in good fun, and there’s no question about your effectiveness; your weapon, as usual, is razor sharp. Be big about the dichotomy you’re sporting right now. Recognize that beneath the chuckles—which you should, by all means, participate in, if possible—people are taking you very seriously. Then do what you’ve got to do, laughing all the way. To contact Caeriel, send mail to sign.language.astrology@gmail.com. W

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age 54 WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 18, 2013

PAGE 55

WeeKender, Wednesday,september18,201

age 56

is pleased to present our Fall Offering

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