Ask Gabby Gayle

Opinion Leibo At Large

Airline passengers divided into four camps

BY DAVID LEIBOWITZ

If you’ve yet to travel by airplane in the age of COVID-19, you’ve missed out on some terri c people watching.

As we’ve discussed previously in this space, America has reached its most fractured point since, oh, the Civil War.

Jet travel is no exception, at least if my recent trip to Florida and back is representative. I spent hours closely observing my fellow travelers, and it appears we have divvied ourselves up into four teams these days, separated by how seriously we’re taking the pandemic. Here are some thumbnail depictions: Team Obey the Rules: These  yers (and I count myself among them) do what federal authorities and the airlines have mandated for safety nowadays, donning a face mask and doing their best to observe social distancing while on the rental car shuttle bus and in the airport waiting areas. They don’t appear too freaked out, but neither do they look entirely comfortable—a feeling I would describe as similar to waking up and discovering that Donald Trump is president of the United States. There’s nothing you can do about it, so you try not to let it worry you to death. Still, you know it’s out there, lurking. Team Defcon Three: These folks take the masking thing a few steps further. I saw a family of  ve at Sky Harbor traipsing through Terminal Four clad in masks, goggles, plastic face shields and latex gloves. I didn’t know if they were headed on vacation somewhere or they were a band

Your health can’t wait.

of gypsy dental hygienists.

The youngest of the three kids, a boy who looked about 5, apparently hadn’t been fully briefed on the new travel protocols, given that I saw him pick his nose with a gloved index  nger. Team Freakshow: Before  ying, I had read news reports of people traveling in full-on plastic hazmat suits. This is the kind of behavior I typically ascribe to Hollywood celebrities, the ultrarich and a few random germaphobes.

On four  ights and four-plus hours spent in various airline terminals, I saw only one person—a 50-something woman from what I could tell—wearing what can only be described as a cross between an ill- tting body condom and one of those in atable sumo wrestler costumes.

Sadly, the getup didn’t include a clear plastic astronaut helmet and Prada space booties. On the positive side, she did have a small dog, a mini-Pomeranian who would have looked darling in a matching doggie suit. Alas, the beast had to settle for a tiny sweater. Team Clint Eastwood: These outlaws seem to revel in defying any and all precautions. They’re the travelers with their American  ag masks hooked over one ear and dangling.

Use a dollop of hand sanitizer in their presence and they roll their eyes, then o er up a stage-whispered critique concerning “sheep” and “fake news fear BS.”

They loudly bemoan the lack of in- ight beverage service and crowd the aisle when it’s time to fetch baggage from the overhead bin.

They’re the folks for whom nonsensical talking points like “we wouldn’t have so many COVID deaths if we didn’t test so much” were invented.

If 2020 actually was a blockbuster horror  ick—rather than merely feeling that way—members of this team would die in act one, stomped by the dinosaur they denied existed, or slashed by the killer a minute after boasting how they’d love to run into that pansy in a dark alley.

To the extent that travel has been changed by the virus and its spread, it is more entertaining. Used to be, you worried about engine trouble or terrorism. Now, you and your travel teammates spend the whole  ight wondering when someone last disinfected your seat-back compartment.

David Leibowitz has called the Valley home since 1995. Contact david@leibowitzsolo.com.

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Ask Gabby Gayle ‘Fed-up’ wife should consider trial separation

BY GAYLE LAGMAN-CRESWICK

QDear Gabby Gayle: I read your answer to the woman who realized she was in a miserable relationship for 40 years and wanted out. I am in a similar marriage, and I want to leave this miserable man. I talked to my married kids about it, and they are dead set against it. They say, “Mom, it’s too late. Dad won’t know what to do without you.” I say, “What about me?” They said that I am a strong woman and I can manage anything. So, I am supposed to stay put because he won’t know what to do? He is mean enough to manage! Help!

Signed, Fed Up

ADear Fed Up: When your kids were little I’m sure you always knew what was best for them, right? There is a strange thing that happens as we age: Our kids seem to take on that parenting role and think they know what is marbles and your thinking process is intact, I feel you should make your own decisions. Perhaps you could do a dry run? Leave him for a month and see how you both feel? He may come to new realizations about his behavior, and you might think misery is better than loneliness? At least it’s worth a try? Let me know what you decide. Good luck and stay strong!

Signed, GG

QDear Gabby Gayle: I have been in a relationship with a guy for about a year. We met on a dating site and communicated for about six months before meeting and began dating. We got along really well. We were just ready to meet each other’s family, when the pandemic hit. We went back to communicating online, and we have really missed each other. He would like to begin dating again, but there is really no place to go in our area because things are still closed. Then he said maybe we should just move in together. I am against that because my family has not met him—although they know about him. I would like your honest opinion about what I should do.

His family knows about me as well. Thank you.

Signed, JJ

ADear JJ: It sounds as if you two must know each other very well by now. While I think moving in together might be a bridge too far right now, I don’t see why you can’t “bring him into your bubble.” Your bubble is the people you associate with on a regular basis, such as family members or close ones. If you bring him into your bubble, he could meet whoever else is in your bubble and you could be let into his bubble—then better for us! As long as you have all your

you could continue to see each other until such a time as you either make the relationship permanent or call it o ! I am sure you will make the right decision! Good luck.

Signed, GG

QDear Gabby Gayle: I am writing about my mom, who lives alone. I get so mad at her because she has fallen several times because she won’t consistently use her walker. I’m afraid she will fall and break a hip or worse. She is on blood thinners. When I scold her, she gets mad and accuses me of treating her like a child. Well, she acts like one! Any suggestions?

Signed, Frustrated

ADear Frustrated: You might want to read my answer to the  rst question in this column. That may give you a little insight. Also, I think sometimes we old people just get tired and don’t care as much about preserving our lives. As my grandfather used to tell me: “You have to die of something!” And we don’t like to be “scolded” by our kids. We changed their diapers and stayed up all night with them when they were sick (and when they stayed out all hours). So, it hurts when they “scold” us. This is when we need lots of love and support. When you can’t make us well, just enjoy us the best you can!

Signed, GG

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