Useless Facts Asalwaystheyareuseless butamazing!

McDonald's invented a sweet-tasting type of broccoli!

Messages from your brain travel along your nerves at up to 200 miles per hour.

Rabbits can't be sick.

Sleeping through summer is called "estivation."

Queen Elizabeth II's cows sleep on waterbeds.

Humans are the only animals that blush.

The hashtag symbol # has a fancy term. It's actually called an octothorp.

You produce about six pounds of stool per week.

You can draw a line 35 miles long using one pencil.

The most common password is "123456."

The first speeding fine took place in 1896. The fine was one shilling, about 5p today.

The abbreviation OMG was used over 100 years ago.

Most pandas in the world are on loan from China.

More than two-thirds of millennials sleep nude.

A Harry Potter book filled with typos sold for $90,000.

Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every 2 weeks.

Bears don’t poop during hibernation.

Americans eat enough burgers to circle the earth over 32 times.

Watching TV burns more calories than sleeping. Great, what time’s Love Island on?!

Renovated Duplex-Apartment near the beach & amenities with 2 Beds, 1 bath, dining-room/kitchen, roof terrace, EPC: In progress; 100m²; Parking Space; Sea Views

Excellent apartment just a few metres from the beach with 2 beds, 1 bath, private parking space, roof terrace, communal pool, EPC: In progress; 69m²; mountain views

Satisfaction Guaranteed

Why do we feel so much nostalgia for the 80s? It was such a stress-free decade with bold fashion statements and new hair trends. Remember mixing music on cassette tapes, recording your message on home answering machines, and not to forget how neon colours rocked with scrunched-up leg warmers over spandex tights. So satisfying.

Well 9 out of 10 Línea Directa customers get the same satisfaction and recommend the best priced car, bike and home insurance to friends and family.

Expat2expat Rewards

When an existing Línea Directa customer recommends a new customer, they both receive 30€. Línea Directa’s Expat2Expat programme is free and open to all existing customers. You can recommend up to 10 people and earn up to 300€ in cash per year. Simply ask your friend to call 952-14-78-34 and quote your full name. Then once their application for car, bike or home insurance has been approved, Línea Directa will pay the reward straight into the bank account following payment of the next or first premium. For more information, see terms and conditions at lineadirecta.com

CHECK-OUT OUR POLICIES

All customer service and documentation is in English, their claims service is fast and efficient, you can get quick no obligation quotes over the phone, and their easy payment options help spread the cost of premiums.

Dedicated To Expats

Línea Directa has been providing comprehensive car, motorbike and home insurance to British expatriates and residents in Spain for over 25 years. With over 3 million customers nationwide, Línea Directa makes sure you get the best possible price for the kind of insurance you really need.

Absolutely Everything Is In English

Their Roadside Assistance team speaks English and will quickly help you with your onward journey. If you urgently need a duplicate set of keys for your motorcycle, then their English-speaking customer service will sort it out. And should you require Home Assistance to set up your new Wi-Fi connection, then English speaking technical staff will set up a visit.

DID YOU KNOW?

All Línea Directa insurance policies offer some exciting features specifically designed for British expatriates living in Spain. Their home insurance includes Pet Assistance, IT Assistance, and Home Maintenance. All motorbike policies come with Replacement Motorbike, Technical Equipment cover and even Young Person’s Night-time Assistance. And their car insurance includes helpful services such as Legal Assistance that can provide help when applying or renewing your driving license in Spain.

Funny Quotes

Some interesting quotes from famous people...

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, 'Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.'

Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: - 'No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.' Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement. Mark Twain

I have never hated a man enough to give his diamonds back. Zsa Gabor

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat. Alex Levine

My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.

Rodney Dangerfield

Money can't buy you happiness... But it does bring you a more pleasant form of misery.

Spike Milligan

Until I was thirteen, I thought my name was SHUT UP. Joe Namath

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap. Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it. W. C. Fields

Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.

Winston Churchill

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out. Phyllis Diller

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.

Billy Crystal

I did rubbish too!!!

Valentine Odes

Classics

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, I really wish my neighbour would stop letting his dog poo on my lawn.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I’d rather be single, than with someone like you.

Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not bloody blue.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, you look like a donkey, and smell like one, too.

Roses are red, violets are blue, white wine costs less than a dinner for two.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I really messed up, now what can I do?

Roses are red, violets are blue, there’s always someone who’s better than you.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I want to order pizza, and watch Netflix with you.

Roses are red, shamrocks are green, and you have the cutest butt I’ve ever seen.

Roses are red. When rum and coke mix, you go from a 3… to a solid 6.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Nah, I’m not 14, I’m the 1 4 U.

Roses are red, violets are blue. How can I be as amazing as you?

Out And About In Torrox

Rebeccah Curtis Beauty & Wellness Centre including Hairdressing and now incorporating Nails and Beauty by Suzi Jackson. Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Commercial B, No. 16 Torrox Costa. Open Tuesday - Saturday 10am - 6pm. Tel: 952 53 01 22 & 651 956 284

Raza Hotel have excellent facilities for your Dog, Cat or Rabbit, the perfect Hotel for your pets while you are away. In the countryside your dogs can enjoy secure outdoor play areas with toys provided & kennels with indoor sleeping area & outside run. For Cats, large catteries with cosy beds, toys & activities to keep them occupied. The Raza Hotel also offer a safe place to leave your Rabbit or Parrot as well as providing dog grooming services. Open 10am-7pm, 7 days a week. If you would like to visit, Paco & Antonio would be happy to show you the facilities. For more info call: 952 52 5417, 646 75 24 63, or email: info@razahotel.com or visit www.razahotel.com

Centro Casa Blanca was opened in 2008 by Bianca Bojahr. Bianca is a qualified Osteopath and a qualified practitioner in Bowen Technique, massage, lymphatic drainage, craniosacral osteopathy, reflexology, reiki and shiatsu. The Centre provides holistic techniques for a wide range of disorders and conditions including: Back problems, neck and shoulders, joint discomfort, tightness in muscles, fluid retention… and more. Call: 659 374 673 for more information.

Clinica Europa is a multidisciplinary medical center in Torrox, where they take care of your health, in the broadest sense, as defined by the World Health Organization. They speak English, German and French. Visit www.clinicaeuropa.eu or call: 952 530 908 for more information.

Shop Local Support Your Local Community

If you have a business in Torrox that you would like to advertise to our readers, call to reserve your space. Tel: 664 210 468

For more information call us on: Paco & Antonia 952 535 417 :: 646 75 24 63

Or email us at: info@razahotel.com

Or visit our website at: www.razahotel.com

BEAUTY AND WELLNESS CENTRE & HAIRDRESSING

Open Tues - Sat 10am - 6pm

Tel: 952 530 122 / 651 956 284

Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness

Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Comercial B, No.16 TORROX COSTA

NAILS & BEAUTY NAILS & BEAUTY BY SUZI JACKSON BY SUZI JACKSON

952 530 122 / 711 047 122 within Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness

Open Tues - Sat 10am - 6pm

Rebeccah Curtis Beauty and Wellness

Urb. Laguna Beach, Centro Comercial B, No.16 TORROX COSTA

Dr. Carlos Castillo Dr. Carlos Castillo GP and Paediatrician

Your health partner

Dr. Lucia Acosta Chileme

Dr. Lucia Acosta Chileme English speaking Dentist

Jose Antonio Gonzalez Jose Antonio Gonzalez

Maxillofacial Surgeon w Cardiologist (Dr. Daniel Gaitán) w Urologist (Dr. Eric Schulten) w Dermatologist (Dr. Joaquin Mut) w Physiotherapy / Osteopathy

Random Joke :)

A man asked a waiter to take a bottle of Merlot to an unusually attractive woman sitting alone at a table in a cozy little restaurant.

So the waiter took the Merlot to the woman and said, 'This is from the gentleman seated over there'

..... and indicated the sender with a nod of his head.

She stared at the wine coolly for a few seconds, not looking at the man, then decided to send a reply to him by a note. The waiter, who was lingering nearby for a response, took the note from her and conveyed it to the gentleman.

The note read: 'For me to accept this bottle, you need to have a Mercedes in your garage, a million dollars in the bank and 7 inches in your pants'.

After reading the note, the man decided to compose one of his own in return.

He folded his note, handed it to the waiter and asked him to deliver it to the lady.

It read:

'Just to let you know things aren't always what they appear to be. I have a Ferrari Maranello, a BMW Z8, a Mercedes CL600, and a Porsche Turbo in my several garages. I have beautiful homes in Aspen and Miami, and a 10,000 acre ranch in Louisiana. And there is over twenty million dollars in my bank accounts and portfolio.

But, not even for a woman as beautiful as you, would I cut off three inches. Just send the wine back.'

The Intex hot tub seats The Intex hot tub seats 4 adults comfortably 4 adults comfortably

Automatic heating system up Automatic heating system up to 40 to 40 00 C. C. 140 air jets that guarantee 140 air jets that guarantee maximum comfort maximum comfort

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There are few events that can´t be There are few events that can´t be improved with a spa bath! improved with a spa bath!

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Call: 655 66 22 75

C C A A L LLL: : 6 6555 5 6 6662 2 2 27 7 5 5

Email: hottubhireaxarquia@gmail.com

Axarquia Hot Tub Hire