6 minute read
Finding Your Ideal Work/Life Balance
FINDING YOUR IDEAL
Work/Life Balance
BY DONNA ISON
– COACH COLENE
These days, more than ever, the very mention of work/life balance provokes eye rolls, head shakes, or outright laughter. With many of us working where we live, it is becoming exceedingly diffi cult to keep a clear distinction between career, family, and self. The very term “home offi ce” implies that there is no distinction between our work space and our house. Couple that with 24-hour-access via half a dozen devices and it’s next to impossible to know where the workday ends and leisure time begins.
However, fi nding work/life is crucial for our mental health and physical wellbeing— so I talked to three experts on the topic.
WORK/LIFE BALANCE BASICS
Before delving into ways you can achieve work/life balance, there are three questions to ask: – What is it? – Do I have it? – If not, how do I achieve it?
According to Colene Eldridge, CEO of Be More Consulting, “Work/Life balance is the unicorn! 'Balance' implies that it should be equal at all times, and the reality is it can't be, and it shouldn't be... that should not be the goal. What I encourage you to think about is work/life integration.”
Elridge, known as Coach Colene, is also the founder of the EmpowHer Conference women's leadership event and the author of Monday Morning Pep Talks.
She explained integration means recognizing that, during certain phases in life, family or self may demand—and deserve— a greater portion of your time and energy. And, at others, the lion’s share will be gobbled up by your career. The key is learning how to handle the imbalance by being fully present in whatever activity requires your attention at the time. One of her favorite mantras is “Be here now.”
Jivamukti Yoga Instructor Suzie Wheeler echoed this sentiment. She stated, “I used to tell my students, balance comes and goes. It's unrealistic to expect to have perfect balance in every pose. I feel that way about life/business as well. I only need to balance the task in front of me.” Wheeler, a graduate of The Life Coach School, is a dating and relationship coach who focuses on single mothers and mothers in blended families.
BEATING BURNOUT
So, how can you tell if you are handling the natural imbalance or it is handling you? In a word: burnout. Burnout displays as an overall feeling of depletion accompanied by lack of motivation, decreased sense of accomplishment, increased sense of being overwhelmed, and the loss of the ability to fi nd inspiration or joy—even in activities that used to spark you.
“A lot of people think burnout are just the physical symptoms of fatigue and exhaustion, but there's so much more to it than that. Burnout can take its toll in all aspects of your life,” Coach Colene said, “The key with burnout is to not just try to push your way through it. That doesn't work—ever! You really have to care your way through it."
3 Top Tips
There are three essential components of achieving a more balanced life. – Realize the importance of routine. – Develop healthy boundaries. – Learn to unplug.
TIP 1: Set a schedule for yourself—and stick to it
Paige Hankla suggests people focus on routine tempered with fl exibility and fl ow. She stated, “Everyone should set up a basic routine for themselves based on their own personal priorities in life. However, the routine shouldn't be so rigid that you can't move things around and go with the fl ow based on how you feel, children's schedules, and any other additional priorities that show up.”
According to the Mayo Clinic, you should aim to stand and stretch every 30 minutes or so during your workday. In addition to countering the negative effects of prolonged sitting, this gives you time to practice some of your good work/life balance techniques!
And as the founder and CEO of PlayThink, which promotes positive lifestyles and mindsets via online and in-person events, she urges people to schedule time for play: “Plan for fun! Write it in your calendar. Set up once a week friend-dates, lunch meetings, hikes, or whatever strikes your fancy.”
Hankla also encouraged incorporating “transition activities” into your schedule to separate the segments of your life. This could as simple as a walk, 10 minutes of meditation, or listening to your favorite song. “Setting up these parameters can help alert the brain that you're moving from one part of your day to the next and soothe the transition,” Hankla explained.
Wheeler takes a similar approach. She stated, “I take 20 minutes to transition from work to relaxing. A yoga headstand or a walk around the block is my equivalent of happy hour to unwind after work.”
TIP 2: Bring on the boundaries
Perhaps there is no greater challenge than learning how to set limits and simply saying “no,” without guilt, when those limits are challenged.
Even as a life coach, Wheeler fi nds it tricky to set and keep distinct boundaries, especially while working from home. She admitted, “I would fi nd myself working at 9pm at night when I was supposed to be spending time with my son. Now I operate as if I am going to work. I have a start time, I get ready, I am fl exible, I take lunch, and I get off at 4pm.”
Coach Colene agrees and encourages people to make a list of what acceptable for you and what is not acceptable to you in each area of your life, including relationships, work, social interactions, health, lifestyle, and even entertainment. “Boundaries improve everything, but we're so scared of hurting other people's feelings that we don't use them. Boundaries are your friend,” Coach Colene said.
TIP 3: Unplug and unfollow
When it comes to screen time and constantly being tethered to a device, Coach Colene suggests assigning time each week to be completely offl ine and setting the “Do Not Disturb” function on your phone.
On the subject of social media, Hankla has a plan for keeping it positive: “I set myself up for success by only following leaders in my chosen fi eld and unfollowing anything else. I do my best to set up a social media feed that is only inspirational, and I set limits.”
READY, SET,
Balance
As working from home is becoming the norm for many, family schedules are returning to round-the-clock, and social media continues to inundate every aspect of our culture, it is up to each of us to take back our time, prioritize play, and determine how we want to expend our precious energy. Even if perfect work/life balance is a myth, we can all take steps to create a more enjoyable existence.
