a book on prayers
r
other tangents
Joel Lurie Grishaver
ORE THAN FIFTEEN (NO, TRUTHFULLY, ALMOST TWENTY) YEARS AGO AS A COLLEGE KID I WROTE A BOOK CALLED SHEMA IS FOR REAL. IT WAS MY FIRST BOOK. IT WAS HANDWRITTEN. WHEN I FIRST OPENED THE BLANK NOTEBOOK TO BEGIN, THE FIRST WORDS I WROTE WERE "Jn &ie, o{ iJJIM-Plu.Me, 1'1M.w- 11w.i- /looJ, Jn!" IT WAS A REFLEX.
WHEN I WAS A KID GOING TO HEBREW SCHOOL, THE FIRST THING WE'D DO WITH A NEW BOOK WAS WRITE THAT ON THE INSIDE COVER. IT WAS OUR WAY OF MAKING THE BOOK OUR OWN. OVER THE COURSE OF THE YEAR WE'D MAKE OTHER ADDITIONS. MOUSTACHES, TATTOOS AND SCARS BECAME PART OF THE DRAWINGS; BALLOONS, CAPTIONS, AND COMMENTS WERE ADDED TO THE TEXT. WHEN SHEMA IS FOR REAL WAS FIRST PRINTED, WE LEFT THAT OPENING ON THE INSIDE COVER. NOW, ALMOST TWENTY YEARS LATER, I AM SITTING DOWN TO WRITE SHEMA IS FOR REAL FOR A SECOND TIME. HEN I WENT TO HEBREW SCHOOL, THE WAY WE STUDIED PRAYERS MADE THEM FEEL LIKE OLYMPIC EVENTS. MY TEACHER KEPT THIS WALL-SIZED SCOREBOARD WHICH WAS FILLED WITH FOIL STARS. I CAN STILL HEAR HER ANNOUNCE, "AND NOW FOR HIS THIRD ATTEMPT AT THE MOURNER'S KADDISH, WE HAVE JOEL GRISHAVER ..." IN SCHOOL WE SPENT A LOT OF TIME READING AND MEMORIZING PRAYERS. WE STUDIED FROM A BOOK CALLED TEACH ME TO PRAY. WHILE I KNEW THAT IT WAS IMPORTANT TO LEARN PRAYERS, I WAS MORE INTERESTED IN UNDERSTANDING THEM. I DIDN'T WANT TO BE "TAUGHT'' TO PRAY. I WANTED TO FIGURE OUT "IF" I BELIEVED IN PRAYER, AND "IF" I COULD GET PRAYER TO WORK FOR ME. THAT GOT ME IN A LOT OF TROUBLE (AND IT IS WHY I SPENT A LOT OF TIME DOODLING IN MY TEXTBOOKS). I WROTE SHEMA IS FOR REAL AS A WAY OF ANSWERING MY OWN QUESTIONS. FOR A LONG TIME THIS BOOK WAS UNTITLED. THEN, I HEARD A STORY FROM A FRIEND OF MINE NAMED SELMA. SHE WAS A HEBREW SCHOOL INSPECTOR. HER OFFICIAL JOB TITLE WAS "CONSULTANT," BUT WHAT SHE REALLY DID WAS GO FROM SCHOOL TO SCHOOL, LOOK AROUND AND MAKE SUGGESTIONS. ONCE SELMA WAS VISITING A FIRST GRADE CLASS WHERE THE KIDS WERE MEMORIZING THE SHEMA. ONE BOY STOOD UP AND RECITED:
2
'Shema' is for reaL I don't know 'Eloheinu.' I don't know 'Ehad@' AS SOON AS I HEARD HER STORY, I KNEW THAT I HAD THE TITLE FOR THIS BOOK. THE SHEMA IS FOR REAL. IT IS A TEXT, A SMALL PIECE OF TORAH WHICH WE CAN PICK UP AND READ. IT IS SOMETHING WE CAN HOLD IN OUR HANDS. GOD (ELOHEINU) AND COSMIC UNITY (EHAD) ARE MUCH HARDER TO KNOW. FROM THE MOMENT I HEARD THAT STORY, THE COURSE OF THIS BOOK WAS SET. IT WAS TO BE A BOOK ABOUT PRAYERS THROUGH WHICH A PERSON COULD LEARN ABOUT PRAYING.
a book on prayers
other tangents
Joel Lurie Grishaver LMOST TWENTY YEARS HAVE PASSED. IN THOSE YEARS l'VE TAUGHT A LOT OF CLASSES, READ A LOT MORE BOOKS, AND IMPROVED A BIT AS AN ARTIST. THESE DAYS, MY "HANDWRITTEN" BOOK IS BEING WORDPROCESSED ON COMPUTER AND TYPESET IN HANDWRITING. IT'S REACHED A POlf\lT WHERE I COULDN'T LIVE WITH THE OLD SHEMA IS FOR REAL ANYMORE. I HAD TOO MANY f\lEW QUESTIONS WHICH NEEDED ANSWERS. SO, DESPITE SOME FEARS ABOUT COMPETING WITH THE ENERGETIC YOUTH WHO FIRST CONCEIVED THIS VOLUME AS A REBELLION AGAINST HIS HEBREW SCHOOL TEACHERS, l'VE SET OUT TO WRITE IT AGAIN-TO MAKE IT MY OWN BOOK ALL OVER AGAIN. I AGAIN OFFER YOU THE SAME INVITATION WHICH BEGAN THE ORIGINAL. FEEL FREE TO MAKE IT YOUR OWN, TOO. ADD MOUSTACHES, TATTOOS AND SCARS. CREATE BALLOONS AND FILL IN YOUR OWN CAPTIONS. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY, MAKE SURE THAT YOU ASK ALL OF THE QUESTIONS YOU WANT. IN THE END, YOUR QUESTIONS WILL BE THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THIS EXPERIENCE. PEACE (AND BHS) JOEL LURIE GRISHAVER
3
For Rachel and Ruth For Farkas, Meyer, Blau and Black For Faj. and Roth For the whole spirit which was Tzofi.m '71 and '72 which taught us that what we need-we create. For my Mother (the bulldozer) who showed me that with effort all of possible For the ghosts of the late 60's which still haunt my doorway which instill naive hope and the courage to do.
0 Leary I'll go round at night and light the lamps with you.
ADONAI, Open my mouth and my tongue will sing Your Praise! boom lacka lacka lacka boom lacka lacka
Thanks to Gerard W. Kaye and Olin Sang Ruby Union Institute for access to take the photographs used in this edition. Thanks to Hilary Crocker for being Ms. Choreography.
Š 1993 Joel Lurie Grishaver ISBN 978-0-933873-35-3 Published by Torah Aura Productions All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by any information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher. This book has been expertly copyedited by Lenore Bruckner & Marilyn Henry Torah Aura Productions MANUFACTURED IN THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA
4