A THOUSAND WORDS

STORY & PAINTING BY ROBERT BECK

Winter Lore g GREETINGS FROM THE WILD, Wild, Upper West Side. Cue the soundtrack for the great American romantic urban symphony: Fanfare For the Common Manhattanite. It’s all right there outside the building: the clip-clop of the manhole covers, and bellowing horns as a herd of taxis drives its way through the limestone canyons. The spirit of our nation in full orchestration lies just beyond my triple-pane windows.

It’s certainly been unusual weather this year. We’ve had a couple of spells of collars-up cold, but these past few months have mostly been too warm for comfort. Old Man Winter took some swats at us but never landed any punches. He’s obviously no match for human apathy and ignorance, and his heart doesn’t appear to be in delivering any hard lessons this go-round.

I reread that paragraph and was struck (as in upside the head) by all the masculine pronouns, and I’m concerned that the term Old Man Winter is too patriarchically biased for today’s sensibilities. Maybe it should be Old Lady Winter? No, that sounds like a fast way to deep trouble. Young woman? Yikes! I’d better be really careful with that, too.

Hmmm. Other countries and cultures seem to have different takes on this, so pardon me while I search for direction online.

Here we go. Skadi (or Skaoi), the Norse God of Winter, is female. She was married to Njord, the Vanir God of wind, seafarers, coasts, and inland waters. That’s quite an extensive portfolio the two of them have. It covers a lot of territory. Quite the power couple, they. I suppose you can’t have a god for every little this and that, so bundling makes sense. Skadi is also responsible for things pertaining to skiers and hunters. And that’s just her winter responsibilities. According to the Internet (and who knows better?) she is also in charge of knowledge, revenge, justice, damage, and independence.

That’s a whole lot of sharp-edged serious stuff, there. Sounds like she’s smart, effective, fair, perhaps a little short tempered, and plays by her own rules. I sure hope she has a good sense of humor. And did I mention that she’s a Giant? I’m not an expert, but it seems that anybody who is anybody in mythology is a giant. In addition, Skadi is described as being “associated to cold and death, but in a benevolent way.” Which in a sense accounts for this winter.

Reading more into Skadi, it appears that she can be ferocious. Her family history is full of kidnappings, killings, retribution and ransom, so there’s no surprise she sometimes exhibits an outsized temperament. The story has it that her dad, Thazi, was killed by some other gods, and she came after them, bent on revenge. Given her resumé and experience, the gods wanted to make a deal rather than duke it out. Her demands included that they make her laugh. I find that a little surprising, but I guess in her world a good laugh is tough to come by. The gods were successful, but it involved tying a rope around a billy goat’s beard, and his testicles, and making him jump around. It’s not clear how that compensated for the death of her father, but if you are familiar with opera plots

then you’re not surprised.

Skadi was also given the pick of a husband from a lineup of gods, but because it’s mythology she could only look at the candidates’ feet before choosing. I know, this is starting to sound like American television. Or the Senate. She ended up picking Njord because he had great shoes, so we shouldn’t be surprised that the marriage didn’t last.

Skadi’s trail grows a little cold after that, but you knew it had to happen. After all, this is the first time you‘ve heard of her, right? Nevertheless, we’ve solved my problem. I can go forward with Lady Winter, Madam Winter, or just Ms. Winter, because I have the example of Skadi: an eminently qualified female God of Winter, who is a great shot with a bow, has a quirky way of making decisions, and absolutely takes no shit. If you’re not a fan of science, that’s as good an explanation of weather as any. But the warm winter doesn’t bode well for us mortals. It’s a concern even if we have moved on to spring now. I’d still keep an eye out for her if I were you. Look for somebody in Norse battle dress. She’s big, and I’m pretty sure she’s a blonde. n