Growing our young people up to leave

Adrian Farrer Principal

There are some habitual, ‘peak’ events we hold at Trinity that have become part of the furniture and folklore of our school. House Performing Arts Festival (HPAF), ANZAC Day Assembly, the Founders’ Day Fair and the Easter “Bonnet, Boot and Belt Parade” come to mind as good examples. There is no doubt that the terrific Trinity Ball we enjoyed recently is right up there with the functions that matter to us all.

Parents are the first educators, of course, and the key partners of the school as we seek to work together to reflect our common purpose. The Parents’ Association, and parents in general, contribute endlessly to the collaboration with Trinity as we strive, together, to “grow our young people up to leave”. As an aside, it is a funny thing to reflect on that there are probably not too many organisations which have as a key goal that the people engaged with them are encouraged to leave! Anyway, the common aim is to have our students prepared for the world and it takes the acknowledgement of everyone’s roles to get it right.

Growing our young people up to leave is conflicting for families. At the recent Mother’s Day Assembly, School ViceCaptain Henri du Toit was interrupted in his speech by his mum, Ilse. She spoke beautifully and honestly, saying:

‘And it’s really, really hard for mums to let go… whether it’s the first day of Prep, or overnight camp, your first solo drive as a P-plater and when eventually you leave the nest. But mums will always be there – waiting for you to return’. It was a clever collaboration with Marly Fan, mother of School Captain Michael, who spoke the next morning at the Year 7 Mother’s Day Breakfast. Her message for the mums in the room included, ‘Trinity wants to train the boys to be independent. We just have to let go little by little. Don’t let go too early, but just know we can’t hold onto them forever’. What great advice and a great blueprint for others to follow. And what a great description of what it is to be a parent of the emerging adults in our care.

The Parents’ Association does lots to assist the school in enhancing the student and staff experience of Trinity, and we are grateful. This year, we are grateful for a different and challenging contribution from normal, as the Parents’ Association joined with the Old Trinity Grammarians’ Association and the school to fund a Memorial for the survivors of Historical Child Sex Abuse. The Dedication of the Memorial – held on 22 June – reflects a statement by the school regarding the need for us to face up to the failure to care in the past as well as a commitment to looking after our students well into the future. Please visit our website for more information.

In alignment with the 30-year anniversary of the Trinity/Ruyton Coordinate Program, we are elated to have made a renewed commitment to the enduring relationship which we enjoy with Ruyton. At one level we have been partners since 1903 (when Trinity joined Ruyton as a school affiliated with Kew's Holy Trinity Anglican Church) and in more recent times we have been educational partners for our senior students for 30 years this year. It is an exciting time for the two schools as we continue to imagine the next 30 years of collaboration and progress.

When it comes to folklore, we continue to honour lots of peak events, but also seek to honour the daily good work of all who partner with us to make Trinity, Trinity. With our close partners, such as the Parents’ Association, the Old Trinity Grammarians’ Association and Ruyton Girls’ School, we have the benefit of the ongoing, evolving communal good that is created through our deep connections.