GRAB IT ALL! OWN IT ALL! DRAIN IT ALL!
THE YING N A M SLA D’S R A L L MA OF MISSION CE, N A E VENG UCED REPROD M FRO PURE KIRBY’S ART! PENCIL
GRAPHITE EDITION by JACK KIRBY & STEVE GERBER
Introduction by MARK EVANIER • Afterword by BUZZ DIXON • Edited by JOHN MORROW
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G R AP H I T E E DI T I O N
by JACK KIRBY & STEVE GERBER Edited by JOHN MORROW
Destroyer Duck: Graphite Edition
TwoMorrows Publishing 10407 Bedfordtown Drive Raleigh, NC 27614 919-449-0344 www.twomorrows.com ISBN 978-1-60549-117-2 First printing, February 2023 Printed in China
SPECIAL THANKS TO: Shaun Clancy Jean Depelley Devon Davidoski Buzz Dixon Mark Evanier David Folkman Samantha Gerber Glen Gold Lisa Kirby Steve Leialoha Manny Maris Harris Miller MSU Libraries
Dean Mullaney Stuart Ng Tom Orzechowski Alan Pinion David Schwartz Mike Thibodeaux Bill Wray
by Jack Kirby & Steve Gerber Re-presenting Destroyer Duck #1–5 in pencil form Edited & designed by John Morrow
Title page image: Envelope for the 1982 F.O.O.G. (Friends of Ol’ Gerber) Portfolio Editorial package © 2023 TwoMorrows Publishing, the Estate of Steve Gerber, and the Rosalind Kirby Trust. All rights reserved. No portion of this publication, except for limited review use, may be reproduced in any manner without express permission.
For more details on Steve Gerber’s legal battle, see: http://rsmwriter.blogspot. com/2016/04/all-quackedup-steve-gerber-marvel.html
And from the text page of Destroyer Duck #1, here’s Steve Gerber’s own 1982 list of thank-yous.
Foreword © John Morrow. Introduction © Mark Evanier. Afterword © Buzz Dixon. Destroyer Duck and all related characters TM & © the Estate of Steve Gerber & the Rosalind Kirby Trust. {2 }
of Tablea g h } {quaa ! tents
FOREWORD by John Morrow...........4 INTRODUCTION by Mark Evanier.....6 PLOT/SYNOPSIS for Destroyer Duck #1.....................12 COVER PENCILS & INKS for Destroyer Duck #1.........28 GODCORP MEMO from Destroyer Duck #1..................30 STORY PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #1.....................31 COVER PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #2.................... 51 UNUSED SPLASH PAGE for Destroyer Duck #2..........52 STORY PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #2.....................53 ALTERNATE PAGE from Destroyer Duck #2..............69 COVER PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #3.................... 74 STORY PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #3.....................75 COVER PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #4....................95 PANEL BREAKDOWNS for Destroyer Duck #4............96 STORY PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #4.....................97 DENOUEMENT LETTER for Destroyer Duck #5........ 117 COVER PENCILS for Destroyer Duck #5.................. 119 UNUSED PANELS for Destroyer Duck #5................. 120 STORY PENCILS & INKS for Destroyer Duck #5....... 121 AFTERWORD by Buzz Dixon................................... 141
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FOREWORD by JOHN MORROW There are three things Jack Kirby didn’t draw well: Spider-Man, Superman’s chest emblem, and duck beaks. But with all the other things he did draw well from the 1930s to the 1980s, I think we can forgive him for needing a “beak consultant” to correct Destroyer Duck’s bill on the 1982–1983 series I’m re-presenting here. So brace yourself: You’re about to see the raw, uncorrected Kirby beaks, compliments of photocopies of his pencils before being inked. First, though, some items of note: Where pencil photocopies don’t exist, we’re using scans of Alfredo Alcala’s inked art. And though we’re missing the end of issue #5 in pencil form, by that point, Jack’s work was showing much less detail, as his eyes and health were failing him -- so seeing Alcala’s inks is a nice trade-off. To enjoy this tome even more, get out your original copies of Destroyer Duck #1–5, to compare all of Alfredo’s inks to Kirby’s pencil art here. Due to the varying range of lettering styles across all five issues, I’ve relettered all the dialogue to hopefully give you a more consistent reading experience. But where showing inked pages was a necessity, Petra Goldberg’s col I left the original lettering intact. or guide
Original first panel from issue #2, page 19, which was expanded to a full-page for page 18 (see pages 71–72 of this book) and a new first panel drawn.
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from issue #2.
Although this is a “Graphite Edition,” I strongly felt it was important to show Steve Gerber’s typed synopsis for issue #1, so you can see exactly what Kirby had to pencil from, and how he interpreted it (and added in his own sensibilities). The series was a true collaboration, as you’ll discover here. Want other examples of Steve’s plots, synopses, scripts, and notes? I’ve compiled a free digital PDF download for readers of this book. Get it at: www.twomorrows.com/ media/Gerber.pdf, you lucky duck! There are at least a couple of thencurrent events that you’ll need to be aware of to fully grasp Steve Gerber’s satire. Just after Destroyer Duck #1 debuted, artist John Byrne wrote an editorial for Comics Scene #2 (March 1982), proudly proclaiming himself a “company man”, saying “I’m a cog in the machine which is Marvel Comics”, and saying creators should be content
with whatever standard deals Marvel offered -- which didn’t include any ownership of their creations. For reasons you’ll read about in Mark Evanier’s introduction, this rubbed both Kirby and Gerber the wrong way, so they joyously skewered Byrne with the character Booster Cogburn in #2 (cog/Byrne, get it?). Less contentiously, Frank Miller’s Elektra first appeared in Marvel’s Daredevil #168 (Jan. 1981), and set fandom afire. The character Medea is a twist on that sai-wielding assassin (and a commentary on the media?). Then there’s the real-life scented Strawberry Shortcake doll line (parodied in Vanilla Cupcake and Cherries Jubilee), Ned Packer (whose name is coincidentally-or-not syllabically similar to then-Marvel
Comics editor in chief Jim Shooter), Mead Packer (a meat packer?), Pac-Man -- this book warrants deep exploration! For instance, I realized for the first time that the name GODCorp directly corresponds to its company slogan (added to the strip by Jack Kirby): “Grab it all, Own it all, Drain it all.” And though I read the series new in the 1980s, I’m just now getting some of Gerber’s other bitingly funny parodies and in-jokes. (“Ooh--das boot” cracks me up!) I hope likewise, you’ll discover something fun here, whether you read the original Eclipse Comics series, or are experiencing it for the first time. -- John Morrow
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Unused cover for issue #2, spotlighting Uranus P. Chicago.
INTRODUCTION by MARK EVANIER was born in St. Louis in 1947, grew up there, and fell in love with comic books there. In 1972, he began writing them for Marvel and moved to New York. I vaguely knew his name from the world of fanzines, but our paths did not coincide, and we did not meet until a few years later when he moved to Southern California and rented an apartment in Burbank, a few blocks from the NBC Studios. But I did read some of the comics he wrote and I found them generally clever and refreshing. He came up with new characters and with fresh takes on old characters. Some of the recently-hired writers at Marvel around that time seemed to have as their goal, making their comics as indistinguishable as possible from classic Lee-and-Kirby, Lee-and-Ditko or Lee-and-Anyone-Else. That Gerber guy wrote like that Gerber guy. There was always some clever twist, some human element that took his super-hero and monster stories to another level. At least, I thought so. I think it was in 1976 that I spent a week or so poaching alternately in the Marvel offices and the DC Comics offices in New York... just hanging around, meeting and talking to people. A few people at each office knew me, and the ones who didn’t just seemed to assume I was some new hire who belonged there. One person in the Production Department at Marvel kept giving me little tasks to do like pasting up a text page or proofreading a story. I did not say, “I’m sorry, but I don’t work here.” I went ahead and pasted up the text page or proofread the story. There was a gent then working for Marvel in roughly the same capacity that I was assumed to be working in. There’s no point in giving his name. Few, if any of you would recognize it. But he didn’t like Steve Gerber, in part for the same reason I liked Gerber’s work: Because it didn’t read like sixties’ Lee-and-Somebody work. That, to me, was a plus. That, to this staffer, was blasphemy. (And the other reason why he didn’t like Gerber’s work was, I suspect, why a lot of people in comics don’t like what others in comics do: Because they covet the job. This guy resented that he was pasting-up text pages and proofreading while Steve was writing The Defenders and Man-Thing and other comics.) From the moment I chanced to mention to him that I liked Gerber’s writing, he began telling me that Steve Gerber was crazy... and he didn’t mean “crazy” like in “Two wild and crazy guys.” He didn’t mean nice-crazy. He meant “crazy” the way someone is crazy if they get a Smith & Wesson M&P 15 semi-
Photo courtesy the Estate of David Anthony Kraft
Stephen Ross Gerber [right]
automatic rifle, go up in a tower, and start picking off innocent strangers. That kind of crazy. Having no evidence to the contrary, I guess I believed the guy. I had never met Steve Gerber and I considered myself lucky. Flash forward a year or three. After every Comic-Con International (which had a different name back then) in San Diego, there’d be an after-party on Sunday evening at the home of MAD cartoonist Sergio Aragonés in Los Angeles. This was a different home than the one he now lives in and he’s now in a different city and he has a different wife. But those were great parties... so great that people who were there in San Diego and otherwise had no reason to go to Los Angeles would drive the many bumper-tobumper hours through Sunday evening traffic on the 5 just to be at Sergio’s for a few hours. At one of those parties, I found myself happily sitting by the pool, eating Numero Uno pizza and talking with a very smart guy whose name I somehow didn’t catch. He knew who I was but if he’d introduced himself, I’d missed it... and this may have happened to you. You’re talking to someone for so long and having such a good time, you’d be embarrassed to say, “Excuse me, but who are you?” Finally though, he mentioned something about writing “The Duck” and I knew he didn’t mean Donald or Daffy. He seemed to be talking about Howard the Duck, the suddenly-successful character Steve Gerber had created in one comic with artist Val Mayerik and continued in the Howard the Duck comic book with Frank Brunner and then other artists. At the time, that duck had only been written by Steve Gerber, so I thought, “This couldn’t be him, could it?” I soon realized it was... and he was not crazy. In fact, he turned out to be one of the sanest people I’ve met in 50+ years in the comic book industry. He died in 2008, but still holds that title with me. That evening at Casa Aragonés, Steve had recently moved to Southern California. He was just
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settling down in his newly-rented apartment and he mentioned something about needing to go find sheets and bedding for a queen-sized bed. As it happened, I had just upgraded my queen-sized bed to what they call a California King and I had a pile of linens and blankets for which I now had no use. When the party was winding down, Steve followed my car to where I was living and I gave him what I had. We wound up sitting in my living room, talking until 4:00 AM and becoming the best of buddies. Moral of the story so far: Don’t believe everything that somebody tells you about somebody else. Especially if it’s derogatory. There will be other morals before we get to the end of this, but I’ll let you figure them out. Not long after that, Steve got into some immense deadline hassles with Marvel over books on which he was writer-editor. All his titles were running late -- some almost fatally so -- and not all of that was his fault. But some of it was. At the same time, he was bickering with Marvel over Howard. Steve had the temerity to suggest that he should own, if not the character itself, then perhaps some percentage of the revenue it was already generating, with more to come. Just a few years later, that would not be an outrageous position for a creator or co-creator to take but at the time, it was like young Oliver Twist asking the proprietors of the orphanage, “Please, sir... may I have some more?” In the book of the same name, Oliver was struck for asking that, thrown in solitary confinement, and there was talk of hanging him. It wasn’t quite that bad for Steve. Soon, he was dismissed for lateness... but he was convinced that would not have happened had he not raised the ownership question. And he was also convinced he needed to sue over custody of that duck. I introduced him to my attorney, Henry W. Holmes... famed in song and story. I’d been introduced to Henry by the noted author, Mr. Harlan Ellison. Harlan was (of course) a fine writer and often a litigious one, and when Harlan prevailed in one of his legal skirmishes, he did not keep the outcome confidential. He wrote eloquently and triumphantly about it... which means he wrote about Henry. I found H.W.H. to be not only a great lawyer, but a great friend... with a genuine love of creative people and a defender of their rights. His client list included many famous names, almost all of whom paid him way more money than Steve ever did... or for that matter, I ever did. That didn’t matter with Henry; not if he liked you, not if he felt you’d been cheated or wronged and he could put things right. Henry studied Steve’s situation
and decided that there was an injustice there and a solid, winnable case that might right that wrong. But he did caution Steve that taking on Marvel Comics would not be cheap... and I suspect even Henry, wise as he was, may have underestimated how “not cheap” it would be. And as the case proceeded, there came a day when Steve’s legal bills were reaching unexpected heights. He began talking about a growing need to abandon the fight... and not because he feared he would lose. That, he knew from Day One, was always possible. He began considering abandoning the cause because he could not afford to stay in the fight long enough to win. In the American legal system, it is not an uncommon situation when someone with shallow pockets goes mano-a-mano with someone who has deep ones. Even one particular court decision in Gerber’s favor -- the judge sanctioning Marvel for stalling tactics and ordering them to pay Steve some money -- did not whittle down his bill enough. He was making good money with his writing at the time. I was then running the comic book division for Hanna-Barbera Studios, preparing material that Marvel was publishing in a series of comics featuring H-B characters... and on a grander scale, preparing material for overseas publication only. Steve came in as my assistant and I gave him numerous writing assignments on the foreign books and one on the H-B books published by Marvel. It was credited to “Reg Everbest,” which was Steve’s name, neatly-anagrammed. We did that because a Marvel staffer, who I guess considered it treason to sue the company that paid him, was reportedly going around, announcing to everyone that Steve Gerber’s work would never ever again appear in any Marvel publication. Well, it did that month. (And his writing appeared in other Marvel books years later with the letters of his name in the proper sequence. That was after the suit was -- SPOILER ALERT! -- settled.) I also introduced Steve to Joe Ruby, co-founder with Ken Spears of the Ruby-Spears Animation firm, and Steve began writing for them. He started with a script for the Plastic Man cartoon series on ABC’s Saturday morning schedule. Joe liked it and Steve soon went on staff there and was an enormous asset, especially by launching a series called Thundarr the Barbarian. Most of the design work on that show was done by a man named Jack Kirby [left, in 1980]. But even with that work and income, Steve was not earning enough money. His case may not have been a losing battle, but making payments on the bill was, and he was seriously into debt to
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certain friends. It was just getting too financially both thought it couldn’t. I became co-editor (with precarious, and he began talking about having to drop Steve) of the book and a few days later, he and I the whole thing. drove out to the home of Jack and Roz Kirby. One of the people he talked to about it was Dean Jack had been working with Steve on Thundarr -Mullaney, one of the publishers at Eclipse, a relatively a very happy experience for both of them -- and on new company that was putting out graphic novels. other projects for Ruby-Spears. They got along well Eclipse had recently published Stewart the Rat, a and had occasionally talked about their mutual probblack-and-white book written by Steve and drawn by lems with Marvel. Jack was particularly interested in Gene Colan. Dean volunteered to publish something as how Steve’s suit was progressing. a benefit to aid Steve’s cause and keep the lawsuit afloat. There are still people around -- including some Steve spent a few days asking himself the who worked at Marvel and should know better -- who question: “What’s the most commercial thing we will tell you that at some point, Jack Kirby sued the could do?” His answer turned out to be a new duck company; that he sued and won, sued and lost, or character... the same species as Howard, but way sued and settled. In truth, he never sued Marvel... more militant to reflect the war he [Steve] was now ever. Did not happen. He -- or rather, his lawyer -- had living through. When he told me the idea, he even had occasionally threatened that, usually in retaliation a name for his fighting fowl: Destroyer Duck. for some perceived threat from some employee at And he had two far-outside-the-box notions for it, Marvel. But Kirby never filed any actual lawsuit... one being to do it not as a graphic novel (like Stewart), ...which does not mean he didn’t think about it but as a conventionally-printed four-color comic and discuss it with attorneys. book... the kind DC and Marvel published and Eclipse When we got to the Kirby home out in Newbury didn’t. At least, they hadn’t put one out yet. Park, Jack and his wife Roz made us feel very Dean’s response was, welcome. She’d prepared in effect, “We could figure a lunch, so over sandout how to do that, where wiches, Steve explained to get it printed and the current status of his everything.” Steve was a suit, leading up to the little scared because there part where his bills were was no real production so staggering that he was department like DC and considering surrender. Marvel had. He’d always I think that struck heard that that was a a chord with Jack. One necessity for four-color reason he had never taken comic books. But Dean the leap of actually suing and I both assured him Marvel was that he feared it could be done. In my winding up exactly where home office, I’d done most Steve was now. That is not of the production work a good place to be, espeDean Mullaney [left] and Steve Gerber in the 1980s. on the Hanna-Barbera cially if you’re supporting comics, and Dean was handling similar duties on the a family. Steve wasn’t. Jack was. books Eclipse published. We told the Kirbys about the benefit comic book So that was one crazy idea. The other was to see we were planning and Steve explained the plot he’d if Jack Kirby would be willing to draw it... without, of devised for the Destroyer Duck story. Jack found it course, compensation. quite wonderful. He laughed in all the right places There were many reasons to think he wouldn’t. and, as he did with every idea that came within a Jack, who’d often felt exploited by his employers and mile of him, added in his own thoughts. The motto even by some of his professed admirers and friends, of Godcorp seen on page 11 -- “Grab it all, own it all, was pretty sensitive about spending his time on work drain it all” -- was an immediate Kirby invention. that would not immediately benefit his family. He When Steve came to the part which introduced also had fought some pretty nasty struggles to not H.W.H., aka “Destroyer Lawyer,” he explained that be transformed into an artist who just drew other Henry Holmes had offered to knock off a large chunk writers’ scripts... or worse, contributed ideas to them of Steve’s legal bill in exchange for the honor. Jack (as he couldn’t help doing) without receiving comhad met Henry and he said, “He’s a good man.” pensation or credit for those ideas. He kept telling Finally, we reached the moment -- and by now, everyone who wanted to force him into other roles Jack was well aware it was coming -- when Steve that he just wanted to create, write and draw his own asked if Jack would donate the pencil art for a twentycomics, not ones written by other people. page story plus cover. Without hesitation, Jack said, Then again, it couldn’t hurt to ask. At least, we “Sounds like fun. Let’s do it.” {8 }
Photo by Bill Wray
Whereupon I heard the world’s largest exhale from Steve Gerber. We all talked about the story for a while and Jack asked what else would fill out the book. I explained, “We’re going to get some other writers and artists to whip up stories.” And Jack grinned when I noted that the writers and artists would own the copyright to their work. At the time, that was almost unheard-of in non-underground comics. The lead story would, of course, be copyrighted by Gerber and Kirby. On the drive home, Steve kept saying, over and over, “I can’t believe it... I can’t believe it...”. With Jack on board, all the other pieces fell rapidly into place. I remember how they fell, but not the precise order in which they fell. Neal Adams, for instance, volunteered to ink the cover. Dean Mullaney took Jack’s penciled cover over to Neal’s studio and sat with him while he inked it. One of the best, in-demand letterers in the business, Tom Orzechowski, volunteered his services for the story, and he also designed the Destroyer Duck title logo. Tom was then living in the same building as the very talented artist Steve Leialoha, who among his many other credits, had been the main inker on the Howard the Duck comic books that Gerber wrote. Leialoha volunteered to color the story... and while Jack’s penciled pages were in the building for lettering, Steve L. also complied with Steve G.’s request to fix up some of the duck beaks that Jack had drawn. That’s why his credit says “Colorist and Beak Consultant.” We needed an inker. Alfredo Alcala [below] had inked much of Kirby’s presentation art for Thundarr and some other jobs for Ruby-Spears. When he heard what we were up to, he called me and practically demanded the job. I confirmed with him, “You are aware it doesn’t pay?” and he said, “I don’t care! I want to do it!” So he did it. At the time, Alfredo might not have been our choice if we were paying and had our pick of many inkers but, as Gerber put it, “He’s easily the best we’re going to get for these rates.” As things turned out, we were both pretty happy with what he did. For the rest of the book: I had the idea to do a couple of stories under the umbrella title of “Great Moments in Comic Book History” -- short tales of colorful true (or not) tales from our industry. I wrote and lettered one with artist Dan Spiegle. It was the kinda-true account of a writer who once ripped-off a publisher for a great deal of money... a story Jack had told me. We didn’t overtly plan it, but all of the
[throughout] Jack Kirby’s preliminary sketches for Destroyer Duck. Above is the initial idea for Vulpa Packer, the Battle-Ax.
stories in the book but one had something to do with the relationship between a comic book publisher and the freelancers who filled their publications. I was going to do a second story about a legendary -- and probably spurious -- incident where a freelancer once in anger dangled an editor out a window. It’s an oft-told tale among folks who worked in comics in the early sixties, and at least a half-dozen old pros claimed to have witnessed it first-hand in the DC Comics offices. None of them, though, agreed on which freelancer and which editor it was... and if that doesn’t make you doubtful that the alleged dangling ever took place, try this: Most of those supposed eyewitnesses did not disagree with DC editor Julius Schwartz’s insistence that the windows in that building did not open. Anyway, before I could write it, Marty Pasko -- who had worked for DC and was now working for Ruby-Spears -- demanded to handle it. Since none of us were getting paid, I decided not to wrestle him for the honor. He wrote the script, Joe Staton penciled it, Scott Shaw! inked it, and “Connie Dobbs” -- a pseudonym for Carol Lay -- did the lettering. I just called Carol and asked why the pen name and why that name, and she didn’t remember. National Lampoon cartoonist Shary Flenniken was staying at my house at the time all this was going on, and she asked if she could get in on the fun. She wrote and drew “The Adventures of Thelma Ironsides” -- the one story that I can’t connect to the theme of publishers and freelancers. This was probably because Shary had never worked for DC or Marvel. And then there were four pages of something called Groo...
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For several years, MAD cartoonist Sergio Aragonés had been doodling up an idea for his own comic book character which he named “Groo the Wanderer.” He wanted to begin doing whole stories of this least-competent barbarian, but he also wanted to retain ownership and control of his creation. Sergio was then traveling a lot overseas and fraternizing with his fellow cartoonists there. Almost all of them owned their own creations. That was the norm just about everywhere around the world... but when a cartoonist in America suggested it to an American comic book publisher back then, it was like he was asking for the moon, the stars, and all the money on this planet. Or, as noted, Oliver Twist asking for seconds. It was a reaction Kirby also got when he mentioned the concept to anyone in a position of power at any comic book company: Absolutely not! Some swore they’d never publish anything they didn’t own in whole and perpetuity, even though they somehow had no problem publishing a comic book of Tarzan or Star Trek or any TV show or movie. One businesstype guy even insisted it could not legally be done; that a copyright was not valid unless it was in the name of a corporation. Sergio knew this was not true... so he waited. He kept sketching Groo and he even wrote and drew one almost-wordless four-page story of his inept hero, waiting for an opportunity to get it into print without deeding over ownership. One afternoon, Gerber and I drove up to Sergio’s house in the hills -- the one where we met, the one Sergio no longer owns -- and gave him that opportunity. We were about twelve words into explaining what we wanted when he stopped us, led us over to a big metal flat file in which he kept artwork and pulled open the drawer with all the Groo material in it. “Take anything you want,” he said, then he added, “Or I can make up something special for your book.” We told him we just wanted the four-page almost-wordless Groo story and we left with it. It was colored, as were the stories drawn by Dan Spiegle, Joe Staton and Shary Flenniken, by Gordon Kent, a good friend of both Steve and myself. Gordon was a writer and production artist for RubySpears, and when the publication of that first Groo story sparked a demand for more and Sergio and I launched an ongoing comic book, Gordon was our first colorist. In the meantime, Dean Mullaney had worked some miracles. He’d done all the research and budgeting and deals to get Destroyer Duck printed. The color separations would be done by Chemical Color
Plate -- the same company that did color separations for DC and Marvel. The printing itself would be done by World Color Press -- the same company that printed comics for DC and Marvel. The press run was 85,000 copies. Dean and I handled the production work in our respective offices and he sent the book off to press. A month or two later, Steve called me and said, somewhat breathlessly, “Are you home? I’m coming over.” He was soon at my door with copies of Destroyer Duck #1, hot off the presses. “We did it,” he said in a tone that suggested a certain amount of shock and surprise. I didn’t see what was so amazing about it. Steve explained: “We did it without them. I always thought you couldn’t publish a comic book without a whole comic book company filled with staff artists and secretaries and editors and assistant editors and accountants... but here it is. It’s a comic book just like the major companies publish and we did it without them. It can be done without them!” Destroyer Duck #1 was not the first comic book from an independent publisher to print in the format of a conventional color comic book. Several undergrounds had preceded it, though I don’t believe any had used the same engraver and the same presses. Somewhat closer to the marketplace of DC and Marvel, Pacific Comics had brought out the first issue of Captain Victory and the Galactic Raiders -- also drawn by Jack Kirby, let’s note -- six months earlier. But Destroyer Duck was one of the first, and it was soon joined by many others. The independents, including many from Eclipse, would go head-to-head with the majors that way. That was one development that followed the publication of Destroyer Duck. So was Groo the Wanderer, which Sergio and I have been doing now for 40+ years. In fact, there were a lot of new comics that were copyrighted by and owned by the writers and/or artists who conceived them. I can’t say how much Destroyer Duck influenced them, but writers and artists refusing to work under the “old deal” certainly had a lot to do with it, and D.D. was a significant marker of that movement. So, I think, was Steve Gerber taking on Marvel and Jack Kirby throwing his considerable weight/ presence/clout (call it what you like) behind independent comics. And of course, the income from the benefit comic -- Dean thinks it was around $50,000 -helped Steve stay in the game until a satisfactory settlement could be reached. No one had given a thought about there being a
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Destroyer Duck #2, let alone other issues, but there seemed to be a demand, so Steve and Jack did four more for which everyone was paid. Jack wasn’t all that happy drawing a comic he didn’t write, and Steve was being offered other comic book work and better-paying animation work as well, so they stepped aside and two more were written by Steve’s (and my) good friend Buzz Dixon... with Gary Kato drawing the last two, and all issues inked by Alfredo Alcala. I’ll bet if you search this book, you can find an Afterword from Buzz all about that. Also important to note: From #2 on, Destroyer Duck had a back-up feature -- “The Starling” -- that gave Superman’s co-creator Jerry Siegel one of the few opportunities he ever had in his life to create and write a comic book story and retain the copyright. Throughout this essay, you may have detected an undertone of pride that I was involved with this book. You’d be right. In 1970, I came into a comic book industry that did not treat its writers and artists very well... even writers and artists who made publishers very, very wealthy. That was one of the reasons why, though I worked a lot in comics, I never made it my only source of income and I tried to never make it my primary
source. It was one of the many, many, many things I learned from Jack Kirby, even if he was never able to do enough of that in his life. I was around to see the industry change a lot for the better, often in ways that the men who controlled the industry in 1970 vowed would never and could never happen. Again, I’m not saying Destroyer Duck caused all or even any of that change... but the change began occurring around the time it came out, and the comic was at least emblematic of that change. And I love the fact that Jack Kirby had a significant role in that change, as he had a role so many times where the comic book field was reborn. And reborn and reborn and reborn... As you look over his art in this book, you may perceive a special energy here. Jack was having eye and hand problems at the time and couldn’t always get the image he “saw” onto the page the way he wanted it on the page. But against that, I can see how inspired he was, and I love the way he and Steve merged the frustrations they’d had throughout their careers to produce a work of elevated passion. I can see how much fun Jack was having, and I hope you can see it too, because it’s there. Trust me, it’s there. -- Mark Evanier Eclipse Comics’ sales sheet for Destroyer Duck #1.
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Neal Adams’ inks for the cover of #1. Note the missing brass knuckles on Duke’s feet, and compare this to the duck’s published face. { 29 }
{ 30 }
DESTROYER DUCK!
Manslaying mallard on A mission of Vengeance!
Created By
STEVE GERBER AND Jack Kirby Writer
Artist
Alfredo Alcala Original Inker
Steve Leialoha, original Colorist and Beak Consultant TOM Orzechowski, Original letterer
IT’S GOT THE WHOLE WORLD
...IN ITS HAND! Another hard day on the high iron
ends with another happy hour at Ginger’s Joynt... but six bits’ worth of cheap anesthetic cannot dilute the sorrow and pain in the breast of Duke “Destroyer” duck.
{q u a a a a g h } We had it ALL, pal--Dinah an’ me--!
TwoBedroom house with built-ins-projection TV-two cars, a boat, an’ a R.V.--! Then, faster’n spit dries on a hot skillet, she’s Gone--with some Hippie-dip duck with no shoes an’ a guitar--! You’re the philosopher, pal--tell me where I blew it!
THE LITTLE GUY,
DESTROYER’S LONE FRIEND AND CONFIDANT, CAN MANAGE ONLY A SHRUG.
{ 31 }
OTHERS AMONG THE CROWD AT GINGER’S, HOWEVER, ARE FAR MORE VOCAL AND DECIDEDLY LESS SYMPATHETIC... !
AWWWWW! Tragedy strikes my beloved foreman! Da big tough duck got his tail burnt by a tart! It’s about Time Somebody Rubbed his Beak in His own Bullchips!
Aaah-SHADDUP, Benny! I Got Problems!
At least youse ain’t broadcastin’ em!
WHY--?!
I mean, I been Dumped Before-for Nicer guys, richer guys, handsomer guys-but not for a wimp!! Ya know how this creep took Dinah away? He Made these sappy Collages outta Pictures o’ Sunsets and petunias---an’ mailed ’em to ’er like love letters-ta show how blasted sensitive he was!!
Can I Help it if I ain’t
Sensitive?!?
{ 32 }
Fergit it, babe. Time’s a-wastin’. I got a room reserved-Someone ought to nail that large duck’s yap shut!
{sigh} Probably not, duke. some of us just aren’t given to big displays of emotion... !
--and ida expects me home by nine.
Now if you got that joke, let’s 86 dinah and discuss your situation-quietly.
And so the nightly ritual of flirtation, frustration, assignation, and libation slouches onward--toward its next inevitable disruption... ! { 33 }
maybe you got a point, pal. I been thinkin’ about chuckin’ the construction work--findin’ somethin’ more appealin’--!
The bank can have all that crap me an’ dinah bought! the Payments wuz breaking’ my back anyway!
youse ducks are born whiners, y’know dat? My mudder usedta have a sayin’--!
Laugh an’ the world laughs with ya!
Cry--
SPLOOSH
Get wise, short stuff! Nobody cares about youse an’ yer runaway bird! Hell... nobody really gives much of a damn about nothin’!
--an’ the world laughs at ya!
Haw!! Youse Ducks--yer no better’n the rest of us stiffs! youse don’t count fer spit! Relax! Have some grins!
Ya got all the answers-an’ they’re all the same: Yer goin’ nowhere, so nobody else can, either!
Dat’s how it works! Dem dat counts get rich! Dem dat don’t--
Party!!
Hey!! Gimme Dat--
That’s real clever, benny.
{ 34 }
But there’s a chink in yer logic benny--
That’s yer chink, benny--right there! I’m too mean to know I’m Little! I get Angry, Benny!
--I mean, besides the fact yer a moron!
i forget I’m S’pozed ta stay in my place an’ party!
My hat!! Why ya little--!!
Sometimes, benny... i even get violent.
{QUAAAAAGH}
H
G URRR
WHA-THOOM!
“It’s just my Nature, Benny... I gotta Fight Back!! ”
{ 35 }
How’dja like that uppercut, pal?
Real Keen, Duke-Peachy. You descended Effortlessly to Benny’s level.
--something strange happens!
GONE!!
huh?!
I thought you wanted to change your approach to--
But the little guy’s harangue
What the blue blazes-he’s
F WOOP!
he was sittin’ right here-an’ he just-Evaporated!
Who did it?? Who Blew ‘im away???
ends abruptly, as--
Nobody, duke--honest! Nobody did nothin’!! There was this flash o’ light--an’ then--”FLOOT!” No more little guy!
Not “Floot”-“FWOOP!” I heard it Distinkly!
It’s a psychic Phenomener! Extraneous Combustin’! I read about it!
Ignore ‘im! He dunno how ta read!
What does it mean??
{choke} It means... the only friend I had in the whole blasted world... just fizzled out... like a cheap three-way bulb!
An’ all I got left is his opinion that I could do somethin’ with my life...!
{ 36 }
I guess I owe it ta ya, pal... ta put yer theory ta the test... !
Up to now, the
life of duke Duck has been a violent but relentlessly ordinary one.
The next several years of
his life are just as violent... but hardly ordinary.
PuMMelled by
circumstances, hamstrung by fear of failure, he has contented himself with physical labor, hard drinking, mediocre sex, and the voracious acquisition of He consumer enlists durables. in the But Dinah’s special defection, the forces... little guy’s prodding, and duke’s first encounter with the fantastic have changed all that.
...and tests his fighting skills in an arena where failure means death!
...the streets of his own hometown!
When his tour of duty is over, he boldly ventures into an even more hostile, more savage environment: Academia.
And her survives--magna cum
laude--with degrees in criminology, physical education, and abnormal psychology.
Freeze, chickens!
Now he is ready to enter the
most barbaric arena of all...
This is a bust!!
His evenings are spent quietly at home--alone with
Then, one night, the nature of that “something”
So I Bust a junkie chicken... haul in a rapist rabbit...
...as a diminutive feathered figure staggers back into duke’s life!
a cognac and his thoughts. and those thoughts, too, are less ordinary with each passing day...!
So plucking what? My Neighbors snort coke, pirate videotapes, an’ bounce checks as a matter of course. Somethin’s turnin’ us all into casual criminals... !
makes itself brutally apparent...
{gasp} d-duke... you there, duke...?
{ 37 }
...as duke discovers for himself when he tries to move the fallen little guy.
N-NO... It Can’t Be...!!
You’re
Alive?!
Blood...! Spillin’ out of his gut in Puddles...!
Barely...
I’m finished, duke... they opened me up... like a gunny sack... poked around inside...
...and never bothered... to sew me... back up...!
{choke} Who?? Who are they?? An’ Where can I find ’em??
Th- that last night {gasp} at ginger’s?... I vanished outta this world!... into another {gasp} space-time c-continuum...
Go on.
...wh-where ducks can’t t-talk... and pink primates c-call all... the shots..! Keep yakkin’. I’m Listenin’.
The great gray mallard shudders with rage.
“I... I was broke... s-starving... I signed on with this c-company... entertainment c-concepts, ltd. !... Division of G-G-Godcorp... that world’s B-Biggest corporation!... they said they’d m-make me a s-star... exploit m-my curiosity value... but all th-they did... was humiliate me...!
t a a l p S
“Th-they hooked me with p-promises... got me under c-contract... an’ then used me... as a second banana to a washed-up lounge comic they represented...
{ 38 }
“And when even th-that didn’t draw the crowds anymore... they booked me in a {sob} live s-sex show... on t-times s-square...! Adult Entertainment! woo woo!
“Th-then, when the n-novelty of that... w-wore off... they s-stuck me in a sideshow... as a f-freak...! {quaaagh}
“twice a night... poopsie finkle would take me to her b-bosom... I could’a died of shame... or suffocation... ! ”
“I... went back to... c-corporate headquarters... met with ned packer... the p-president of the whole c-company!... he s-said it was all a bookkeeper’s error!...
I... hired a lawyer... tried to get outta my c-contract...! But Godcorp... ignored his letters... w-wouldn’t return his c-calls... and said they’d take care o’ me... If I called him off...!
“th-they got c-confused {gasp} ’cause he transferred my c-contract to... to another division:
I s-said “no”... so they cut off my income...!
“M-medical concepts, ltd. ... th-they wanted to see what made me t-tick... so they could breed a less contentious talking d-duck... for companionship concepts, ltd. to sell... as pets... to little kids...!
{gasp} They’re thugs, duke...! Gangsters with expense accounts...! g-go to that w-world... find m-my lawyer... h-holmes...! Make... ’em
pay...
Rest easy, squirt. They’ll pay.
“They left me lyin’ there... bleedin’... b-but somehow... I flashed back here...!”
{ 39 }
Following the interment, duke requests a leave of absence from the force and undertakes a weird journey--across the expanse of nega-space--
--to the world of pink primates, on an errand of retribution.
--as devastating as that perpetrated on his friend.
There is ice now where his
heart had been--a chilling, implacable rage that can only be assuaged by an act of vengeance--
...then he can suspend restraint --in the interest of justice. The joyride’s over packer. here comes trouble.
If corporations--and his
neighbors--can suspend ethical considerations in the interest of short-term gain...
And so destroyer duck waddles ashore on staten island...
...and treks all the way to wino country in lower manhattan, seeking an inconspicuous base of operations.
But a company that keeps its ethics in the gutter can hardly afford not to have eyes there, too... on a freelance basis, of course. MR. Packer? This’s Chummo. Wanna buy another duck...?
We’re recording you, chummo. speak up. Right... a larger one... surly demeanor... duffel bag... ...in commando attire... ...headed south.
{ 40 }
What do you mean, he “Reminds you of a cop”?
Bite your tongue, chummo --off.
Whatever this creature may be--he is not “Tough.”
What you’ve described is a brute--a common roughneck--hard on the outside, but weak, irresolute, and squeamish within.
Al Haig is tough. i am tough. a duck is not tough.
Toughness is something else, chummo--something rare. it’s the quality of a manager, a decision-maker. Muscle is cheap. ideas are cheap. everything is cheap--except the man to manage it.
Ned packer, president
of godcorp, has never had an idea in his life-and he’s proud of it. like the unliving entity he captains, he exists to generate profit-and ideas invariably interfere with the efficient pursuit of that objective.
Thus evolved the godcorp philosophy: Acquire All Creation...
...and the godcorp motto:
Call woblina strangelegs.
Have her meet me at the east end of my office-immediately.
we make product.
And the godcorp employee policy:
where would you be without godcorp?”
yessir!
{ 41 }
Some miles East... WoblinA... who is available from our enforcement concepts subsidiary... for a rather distasteful assignment?
Freelance. More costefficient. we deduct no taxes, pay no social security, provide no tools, and still purport to own the kill.
Also, sir... your mother needs the work. I was going to assign her to the holmes matter, but...
Termination or impairment divisions?
This new business may well be related, woblina. Tell mother I’ll be paying her a call.
The Former. Employee or freelance?
Which would you recommend?
Woblina shuffles off to comply... as packer soars out of his office, over the empire he has helped to acquire, toward the dwelling concepts subsidiary’s mondo condo model cubicle project...
...vulpa packer--the
BATTLE-AX!
Good news, mother. I have work for you.
...and the low-rent apartment he provides for his mother...
It’s about time, you ungrateful snot! I get paid by the head, y’know! Piecework!
And I haven’t had a call from you in weeks! I could’a starved--!
That stinking sub-vermin junkie--
Again?!
Don’t overdramatize, mother. you’re to meet chummo on the bowery. he--
How can you associate with such people?? You’re a big man, neddy!! I can’t even figure out why you’d wanna be seen with me, anymore!
I prefer dealing with junkies like chummo-and you, dear.
Chummo??
{ 42 }
You’re a junkie for your paycheck. and we have others whose “drugs” are status, glamor, fame, power...!
All of Godcorp’s employees and freelancers are junkies, Mother.
The nature of the addiction doesn’t matter... as long as godcorp remains the connection. then, I know exactly where I stand.
Aaaah-PFOO!!
“Self-reliance breeds self-esteem...
“...and self-esteem breeds discontent. and godcorp wasn’t built on discontent. we need our happy junkies.”
{ 43 }
We encourage that dependency relationship.
That Evening... I know the outfit’s a little unorthodox for an attorney...
They fight all their battles with money, duke. ...but an entertainment and copyright lawyer has to be prepared for anything.
The entire staff of their legal concepts subsidiary was turned loose on us. They besieged us with motions, depositions, interrogations...! Imagine--All the resources of a mammoth, arrogant corporation marshalled against a single individual!
They got the little guy back into their clutches before I could get a court order to open the files of legal concepts--and see his contract. They never gave him a copy of it--! An’ the rest happened all over my rug, huh...?
The Little guy trusted ya, holmes-so do I. Fill me in on Godcorp.
Yeah. exactly.
They’re Dangerous people, duke--very vindictive, very vicious. They hated the little guy because he stood up for himself.
Then, Without warning, through the window comes...
But if you’re willing to carry on the fight--
DIE, DUCK!!
{ 44 }
DOUBLEDIE!!
{QUAAAGH!} An’ here I thought she was collectin’ for the salvation army!! Maybe I’m Not Such A Hotshot Detective, After all!
Duke-Look Out! She’s one of Godcorp’s Assassin Squad!!
DIE!
CHOM F But trust me, holmes--I came equipped for Combat!
E
An’ I can be an extremely hot shot--
AAA A A E E EYA
AA
A
AA A
A
SHOoOM --with my favorite old war souvenir!!
TH WU N K! Tough luck, grandma--ya made an ash o’ yourself!
{ 45 }
Now... as I was almost sayin’ before-if I got the evidence ya need on godcorp... couldja take ’em to court?
Trust me again, holmes. Ya don’t wanna know.
By the way.. did you notice where i dropped the keys to my flying ferrari...?
What Evidence? How--?
Keys? What Keys...?
Hmmm. I suppose I can’t stop you. their address is listed in the phone book...!
“Attention all units! Unauthorized vehicle entering Godcorp air space! Please advise as to appropriate response.”
{quaaagh}
“unit commander, this is packer. can you identify the driver?”
“I want that vehicle blasted out of the sky!!”
“Negative, sir-but his helmet appears to have a beak.”
M O BO
“All units! This is packer! Battle Stations!
Battle Stations!
“Direct hit, sir--but driver may have survived!”
{ 46 }
Not only that, but...
...They dropped me off right at the door!
Hmph. Can’t Kick about their service, anyway...
On the other hand... maybe that’s ’cause I was expected!
Halt, fowl! I am woblina strangelegs, MR. Packer’s personal secretary.
And, without warning,
woblina launches into the strangelegs dance of death!!
One side, lady! I want inta those files!
I warn you--one more step-and I’ll Dance!
Assuming she is either mad or a
diversionary device, destroyer storms forward...!
{QUARRGH}
Some people are double-jointed. some triple-jointed. I am Universal-jointed!
! P A
W An upward
kick--from the knee-disarms him!
A shoulder twists
720 degrees to deliver a rockhard fist to his midsection!
Her laughter meets his ears, as her knees meet his face. then, there is darkness.
{ 47 }
He awakens in the bowels of
I had this apparatus constructed expressly for the little guy. when medical concepts had finished with him--
meat concepts--stripped, splayed, and plucked for processing--under the icy supervision of ned packer.
--I wanted him pressed, cooked, and served to me on a silver platter.
It’s not enough to defeat an enemy. one must devour, digest and eliminate him.
And you torched my mother tonight. I’d say that makes us even. this is business, duck!
Now it’s you whose final resting place could be in sewage concepts--unless, of course, you speedily come to your senses.
You’d be foolish to throw away a promising career with Godcorp--
You could have a lucrative future with this organization...!
--over a paltry matter of principle! Y-Ya killed my friend-ya were gonna--eat ’im--!!
True... !
{ 48 }
your “friend” was a spineless malcontent! an ingrate! A turncoat! More trouble than he was worth! Whereas you--
{quaaagh}
--you possess a strength of character, a killer instinct, which he was utterly lacking. Damn straight, sleazeball--!
He kept blamin’ himself for what went wrong! he couldn’t believe yer heart was dead an’ rotting--!!
{UNMPH}
But me... I ain’t got that problem, buster!
PF M O CH
I’m usedta dealin’ with stiffs!
Ya don’t fool me-ya don’t scare me-ya barely even interest me--!
I spotted the maggots crawlin’ outta yer mouth the minute ya opened it!
Y-You can’t talk to me that way! I’m--
yer a two-bit corporate punk, packer... a reg’lar he-man... mister tough...
{AWWP}
POW! ...as long as ya got an army coverin’ yer butt!!
{ 49 }
Yer a troll, packer-very ugly an’ very small!
But then, so are most parasites! you’ve leeched off other guys’ talent an’ blood for too long, packer!
H O W S SK
Ya don’t remember how ta do yer own bleedin’! Well... here’s how!!
Thus, ned packer becomes a meat concept. Next evening, in a plush midtown eatery...
I’ve only glanced through the file, duke-and I’ve already turned up enough dirt to keep Procter & gamble in business ’til the year 2000... ...and Godcorp in the courts for a year or two longer!
Ned packer is dead--but godcorp lives on!! And though one small battle has been fought and won, the war has yet to begin!
Then let’s knock one back--for the Little guy, Holmes!
If you demand it-{snif} Cabernet sauvignon ’65... the duck’s got taste.
{ 50 }
The destruction will continue in future issues of
DESTROYER DUCK!! Write To:
Destroyer Duck Eclipse Enterprises 81 Delaware Street Staten Island, N.Y. 10304
Cover pencils to Destroyer Duck #2.
{ 51 }
Initial version of the splash page for Destroyer Duck #2.
{ 52 }
DESTROYER DUCK!
Manslaying mallard on A mission of Vengeance!
Created By
STEVE GERBER AND Jack Kirby Writer
Artist
Alfredo Alcala Original Inker
TOM Orzechowski, Original letterer Petra Goldberg, original Colorist TOM Enriquez, Beak Consultant
MOMMIE NOISES! It is the mistaken opinion
of Duke “Destroyer” Duck that his mission to the world of pink primates has been accomplished.
Ned Packer--
President of Godcorp, LTD. and murderer of Duke’s best friend, the little guy-is dead.
Holmes, the little
guy’s attorney, has filed suit against Godcorp, alleging everything from monopolistic trade practices to vivisection of sapient life-forms.
So Duke builds a new Nega-Space Transport for his journey home--unaware that death (or its duly-appointed agent) has drawn a bead on his feathered skull!
{ 53 }
This is Uranus P. Chicago--
who changed his name numerologically after a perfectly awful acid trip in 1968.
His rechristening was supposed to have brought him fame--
--And therefore wealth and fawning women--all of which he greatly desired.
Uranus has since
failed as an actor, a poet, a rock musician, a coke dealer, and a holistic nutritionist.
V isions of celebrity dancing in his head, he takes his shot at the definitive upscale occupation of the ’eighties:
Assassination.
But he won’t-he can’t--give up the dream.
But the
cover of “People” eludes him again…!
{choke} what’s wrong with you Duck? Why won’t you die?
{quaaaagh} Don’t you understand?? You’ve got to die--for her!--
--For
HER!!
{ 54 }
For…
HER…
Yeah, well…
{aauugh}
…This is for ME!
Feel like talkin’, deadeye--or do I haveta give myself another present first?
{sob} she was… so pure, so innocent… ’til her music teacher molested her!
It was his fault! {sob} He set her up--to be seduced by that neurotic, middle-aged pseudointellectual from Manhattan!
hah…?
No wonder she turned dyke {sob} and stopped answering my letters--!!
Mariel Hemingway--
Who?
Who ELSE??!
She was too hurt! She couldn’t believe anyone cared!
That’s why I took this job! {choke} so she’d know I could protect her--even better than her sister! “Job?” You’re gettin’ paid for this--?
Who--!!?
{ 55 }
Well, y’know-purely from the intended victim’s point of view--
Uh, yeah--yeah!-I’m pickin’ up a little change! So what??
Sing, scumsucker! Who paid you? How much? And why? {gnnph} N-No-She’ll kill me-Fork me-If I talk--!
--it ain’t quite the same as murderin’ for love!
Who?? This dyke of your dreams??
NO-O-O! !
Don’t say filthy things like that about Mariel!!
Three little words. Three little Soul-Chilling words…
…That can only mean: wholly-owned subsidiary of Godcorp!
It wasn’t her! It was this woman I met--in the hospital--!
Beat it, punk! hustle your black-and-blue butt back to Corporate Hindquarters!
What woman? Gimme a name!
MEDEA!! And the outfit she works for-Enforcement Concepts, LTD. !!
An’ tell the bums in the executive suite--They’ll be applyin’ for entry-level jobs in hell if they try this again!
{QUAAAGH}
Note Kirby’s unused dialogue in this last panel. { 56 }
I must’a been nuts--or just plain stupid-not to expect a retaliatory strike.
I pulverized the president of their corporation. Naturally, they’re gonna be honked off--
{hic} How’sh yer spashe-ship comin’, Dukie? Ready {hic} fer blasht-off? Not yet, Quentin. By the way… There’s a leaky pipe in the basement. Better call a plumber.
--even if the cops and the papers did buy their “industrial accident” story on Packer.
What doesn’t figure, though…
…is why they’d risk another carcass to explain! Unless they’re up to something so colossal… that Holmes’ charges, and even murder, pale by comparison!
--than what?? Godcorp only knows.
Maybe they’d rather the justice department turned up a few corpses than--
Half a world away, in the Middle Eastern emirate of Hoqoom, it is morning. From a rooftop vantage point, high above the narrow, winding streets, Booster Cogburn surveys the capital city.
They even sound swarthy. Let’s just say… I wouldn’t wanna die here.
{ 57 }
“Do you find Hoqoom to your liking, MR. Cogburn?” comes a voice.
On that discordant note, the great gray mallard slips into troubled slumber.
Luckily, I didn’t come here to croak. I came here to deliver the goods. So I see. My proposition interests your company, then?
Tell me, MR. Cogburn-how do you feel about this matter---about your company’s association with my organization?
I don’t.
That’s for MR. Upwind to say, General. I’m no businessman. I just do what I’m told.
Ah! And what were you told?
I’m a company man, General. I’m not paid to have opinions. The company takes all the risks, see? So I leave the moral judgments to them.
To make sure you took delivery of that arms shipment--and to give you these plane tickets.
MR. Upwind wants to meet you in person-next week--in Switzerland.
Personally, I figure all you terrorist-types for pissant cowards. You wanna kill a guy--have the guts to shoot him in the face! Don’t bomb his house and skag his wife and babies, too--y’follow? Perfectly. Shoot him in the face.
How sad your company did not inform you… …that General Yaousah Abuuk cares little for sheep… and less for sheep who insult him.
{ 58 }
Booster Cogburn’s bullet-
riddled body strikes the ground 23 stories below. Virtually every bone shatters on impact.
{skeeek?}
Then…
It begins.
The
poking upward.
The ripping of flesh.
The ghastly struggle of the spinal column to disengage from the corpse.
{skeeek}
For long moments, while the Hoqoom Liberation Front makes off with the armaments, Cogburn lies still…
{SKEEEK!!}
Jerking and whipping violently, it severs every filament of connection to the dead man… and then departs, clattering down the alley toward some unspeakable destiny.
The rats resist any temptation to follow. { 59 }
Some hours later, dawn breaks over the Long Island Headquarters of the World’s Largest Corporation…!
Sidney Upwind, Chairman of the Board:
The most serious crisis in our corporate history has arisen-on the brink of our company’s greatest and most profitable expansion.
The Hoqoom deal
MUST
The Justice Department probe must be halted-and the public perception of Godcorp as a positive economic and social influence must be reinforced.
go off as planned!
Woblina Strangelegs,
head of Godcorp’s SocioTechnology Division:
Mead Packer, brother of the late Ned Packer, and Chief of the Leisure Division:
Enforcement Concepts is already acting to terminate the Duck, MR. Upwind. Impairment Section has Holmes under surveillance.
Entertainment Concepts is packaging a World Tour for Vanilla Cupcake TM! She’ll be photographed at the White House--
Legal, Energy, and Military-Industrial Concepts are ready to move in Hoqoom on your authorization.
--then fly to Hoqoom, where her product line has been banned by the present regime.
We’ll snap her kissing General Abuuk.
{ 60 }
Recommendations?
Abel Stugg,
Head of Godcorp’s Human Needs Division:
My people will move in after the Liberation--to provide alternatives for the Hoqoomites in the areas of health care, sewage, nutrition, housing, and the mourning process. We want to establish a nurturing, caring relationship between Hoqoom and Godcorp.
Be sure it’s a cost-efficient nurturing, caring relationship, Abel. Woblina, I’ll want a report on the disposition of the Duck matter.
Shortly, in the offices of Enforcement Concepts, LTD…!
Medea is my next stop, MR. Upwind.
Bad Boy!
Bad-Bad-
BAD!!!
AAH-YAAGH!
You disobeyed me! You’ll feel the forks of Medea pierce your heart for this!!! {ARRGH} No!! Pleeeease!! It was an accident! Every accident is somebody’s fault!
Is this how you repay your Mommie-with carelessness??
{ 61 }
That’s a direct order from your superior!
Be still and take your punishment, little boy!!!
Stop--or I’ll
DANCE!!
Oh, pish and tush, Strangelegs! The avenging Mommie doesn’t give a toot!
MedEa--
NO!!
My little Uranus made poop of his mission to kill the
Du--
That is a pity, “Mommie”--but let’s not waste him just yet!
{UHHHHK}
We might want to learn what the Duck found--
{OWWWWT}
In that case, if Uranus did fail-You’ll get your wish!
But “Mommie” will kill Ducks--not fellow employees!
Mommie doesn’t want excuses! Mommie wants to kill!
Mommie is the grown-up. Mommie can kill anybody she wants… Strangelegs.
{ 62 }
Later that morning, in the midtown offices of “Destroyer Lawyer” Holmes… Medea?? Medea Souvlakis?!?
It was a page-one trial a few years back, Duke. She killed both her children-stabbed them repeatedly with barbecue forks.
That childmurderess is working for Godcorp??
She pleaded diminished capacity--claimed that her mental faculties were impaired from eating the kids’ sugar-coated cereals. The jury in California believed her. She got off with two years in a mental hospital.
She used her two years to conduct a recruiting drive for psychos!
And now she’s turning them into corporate hit men. Amazing. You should’ve held on to that weirdo, Duke. He’d have made our case. I know. I know… I let my temper get the best of me. The little guy usedta ride me about that.
…something we gotta discuss, Holmes: Money. I appreciate your paying my way up to now--but I gotta start supporting myself. Don’t be ridiculous, Duke--you’re a duck! You’re unemployable in this space-time continuum!
But I had something on my mind…
{ 63 }
That fits. My would-be assassin said he met her in a hospital.
Thanks for the vote of confidence, Holmes… but I’m gonna try, anyway, I got my pride.
Will do. And Duke-before you apply for a job--go home and change your personality.
Funny, Holmes. Every fiber of my being is rollicking. {quaaaagh} I should’a known--nobody ever gets in the last word with a lawyer…
Oh, one more thing: they’re probably gunning for you, too-so keep your legal-eagle eyes open, huh?
…except another lawyer.
“Unemployable”--HAH! NedPluckingPacker offered me a job with Godcorp, Holmes! If I’d accepted, they wouldn’t be trying to off me--and I wouldn’t have to listen to your smart remarks.
’Course… the little guy would’ve gone unavenged.
Shhhhh!! Don’t you be scared!!
{sigh} It’s all Trade-Offs, ain’t it… huh??
{QUAAAAGH!!}
{ 64 }
Mommie is here! She’ll take good care of you--
--Forever and EVER!!!
What’s the matter, Toots-puncturing little tykes get boring? No challenge stabbing an infant in its crib??
{UNNGH} A barbecue fork?!? Then, you’re-Medea!!!
Don’t you dare talk to Mommie that way!!! Holy Macaroni! It’s a Duck, Ma! Just like at Disney World!
Mommie will punish you for being so rude and nasty!
Hi, Donald! Hi !!
Woweewow!! She screams just like you, mom!! Cindy! Don’t you dare talk to Mommie that way!
The name’s Duke, Honey-and stand back! I got dangerous business with that cheap facsimile of maternal instinct!
{ 65 }
It’s not nice to call people names!
You could hurt their feelings--
--And then they’ll want to hurt you back!
{QUAARRGH}
That’s why you must be punished!
So you won’t be rude again-not ever!
Yeah, well--I was brought up different, lady!
My pop always said: “sticks an’ stones can mash yer bones”--
--“so be sure you got the sticks an’ stones!”
You--with the forks!-Hold it right there!
{ 66 }
Stay out of this! It’s a parental matter!
Aww! Did Mommie give you a fright?
{! }
Poor widdle Duck looks like he messed his pants!
You hear me, Duck-come along---or Mommie will play the game all by herself!
Come along, now--and Mommie will fix you all up!
Damn! Some kinda toxin on the curler! Arm’s as cold as yesterday’s oatmeal-and about as useful! I’m comin’ Ma--just a minute!
{ 67 }
Meanwhile, at the Headquarters of Medical Concepts, LTD., within the Godcorp complex… …but the pain she’s feeling will be gone by morning.
Whereas, the revenue she’s generating will be there the rest of her life?
It’s a shame we can’t synthesize the formula yet, Dr. Roxnitz… Exactly, doctor. These periodic glandular taps are the price she pays for being Vanilla CupcakeTM--the symbol of friendship with icing on top to children the world over. Do I detect a note of disapproval, doctor?
Don’t cry, Vanilla CupcakeTM. It’ll be over soon. Uncle Mead promises!
And the hottest licensing property in history, MR. Packer?
Heavens, no! I adore the sound of money jangling and little children wailing in agony!
{nnngh} Uncle Mead’s… a pookfaced liar!!
{moan} Uncle Mead… promised… percentage of gross, too! {uhhn}
{ 68 }
Jack originally drew Sidney Upwind, instead of Mead Packer, on this page. It’s unknown if that was Gerber’s original intent. { 69 }
But they will be searching every sand-encrusted nook of the city for us!
Concomitantly, in Hoqoom… Superior driving, Private Ashmet! After a seven-hour chase, we have successfully eluded the heretic Pakhmani’s troops!
When we have overthrown Pakhmani’s abominable regime, Ashmet, your heroism shall not go unrewarded.
Neither we--nor our precious arms shipment-must be found!
Make haste! Into our secret enclave!
It shall be rewarded enough to see you breach the great Mosque of Hoqoom---and disembowel the heretic!
That’s a while off yet, Ashcan.
First, the General’s gotta meet with MR. Upwind in Switzerland, right?
And hey, no hard feelin’s about what happened on the roof, okay? Like I told you boys--I didn’t wanna die here!
sputum of Satan... !
{ 70 }
Manhattan: A traffic snag has developed at the corner of Madison Avenue and 57th Street.
Whaddaya doon, ya loony-boid?! Gidoudda my way!
Don’t you tell Mother what to do, little boy!
Allayouse!!!
Shuddup yer punims an’ clear da street!
I can’t!! I got a barbecue fork in my distributor cap!
A single panel drawn for the next page was turned into this full-pager. The address above was the same as Marvel Comics’ offices. { 71 }
You hoid da cop, lady! Move along-before I break yer cockeyed face!
Are you threatening Mommie? In public?? Didn’t anyone teach you any respect???
So Mommie is going to discipline you!!!
You’ve made Mommie very embarrassed!!
The hell you are, lady--!!
EAT HOT COLOBOLO!!
From now on you’ll mind your m--
OH--
FUDGE!!!
{omigod} {unngh} Who do you think you are?! You’ve no right to interfere between a boy and his mother!
Except in cases of child abuse-and I think this qualifies--!
The first panel above was redrawn (see page 4 of this book). { 72 }
C’mon, Medea--enough is enough! Call off the carnage and let’s break for lunch! I’ll buy you a weenie, and personally escort you to the nearest isolation ward!
Steaks!! Ribs!! That’s what we’re having!! This is
{gasp} Weenie?!? Why--you despicable --!!!
Here’s what you can do with your weenie--!!!
{QUAA-AGH! }
Damn you, Medea! Come back here! I’m only wounded! Mommie didn’t win!
You have weenies
EVERY DAY
For Lunch--!!!
SUPPERTIME!!! {urrrggh} Must’ve struck a nerve…!
You hear me, lady?! You’re not even a … {unnh}
… let a lone… a
…not even a … competent… psychopath…
mother…!
With that, the
grim gray mallard falls.
{ 73 }
Gerber’s description, and Kirby’s interpretation, for the cover of Destroyer Duck #3. { 74 }
DESTROYER DUCK!
Manslaying mallard on A mission of Vengeance!
Two hours ago, Duke “Destroyer” Duck lay unmoving on the asphalt of a midtown intersection, two puncture wounds in his back.
These were
inflicted by the twin-pronged, toxin-coated barbecue fork of Medea Souvlakis, head of Godcorp’s Enforcement Concepts, LTD. subsidiary.
Now, however, Duke is… elsewhere.
And the guardians
Granite walls exclude all light. The ancient air is fetid, unbreathable. Cobwebs cling to his face and beak.
Created By
STEVE GERBER AND Jack Kirby Writer
Artist
He is suffocating.
Alfredo Alcala Original Inker
{ 75 }
of this place--a horn-headed jackal and a falcon with the visage of Medea--bleat and cackle their approval.
ADAM Kubert - Original Letterer Petra Scotese - original Colorist Thom Enriquez - Beak Consultant
The sound is not unlike
that of the traffic at 61st street and third avenue-an intersection in the throes of gridlock.
The driver of a
surrounded animal shelter truck presses his full weight against the spokes of his steering wheel.
H is horn blares loud and long…
{QUAAAGH}
…to the extreme irritation of his cargo.
The doberman mistook its now-noseless owner for a burglar this morning. The bantam was rescued from an upper west side voodoo altar.
The duck was
stabbed, presumably to death, in a streetfight.
So they zipped him into a body bag and hauled him away… prematurely. And the clinging
plastic, the dog, the rooster’s crowing, and the horn found analogues in Duke’s druginduced nightmare.
Yes, it was all a dream …except the part about asphyxiation.
Liked me better as a stiff huh, Pooch?
Well, life’s full of little disapointments. Just snarl and bear it.
The door {gasp} Promised myself…in ’Nam-wouldn’t be caught dead--in one’a these--!
Damned {gasp} if I’ll wear one-alive--!!
latch slips …and with Pavlovian suddenness--
{ 76 }
--the doberman goes berserk, launching itself through the bars of its cage--
--straight for the waterfowl’s THROAT!
The impact
slams Duke against the door with such force…
…that dog and duck tumble out of the truck…
…and onto the hood of the continental directly behind it!
Duke’s roadhouse right stuns the canine momentarily, but… He’s still comin’! I don’t believe it! That punch put wildebeests to sleep back home--!
One flying tackle later…
Veggies! Fresh Froot! Yoguht! Trail Mix!
…The bottom, top, and all four sides drop out of macrobiotics, as well.
Fag food! Why’d da bottom haveta drop outta chili dogs…?
{ 77 }
HEY!
Ya moron!! Why don’tcha watch where yer joggin’?! I’m gonna break yer goddam legs!!
Back off, Buster! I already paid for my mistake!
Before or after Fido chews ’em off…?
I got an accidental taste of your ranch dressing!
Dammit! Can’t--stand up straight! Toxin--still in my system! Gotta lose this blasted mutt --and fast---or I might as well curl up in his doggy dish an’ die!
C’mon legs--one last burst of speed! Just enough--to reach that-fire escape--!
AAAH--
Shut up!
{ 78 }
Made it! Our dinner date’s off!
Now if I can just find a nice, quiet spot to catch my-Hmm. Window open. Nothing moving inside.
Tenant’s probably out robbing somebody.
Place should be good for a few minutes rest, anyway.
But inside, a startling sight
greets the marauding mallard… Milton…?! No… it’s a telephone shaped like Milton…!
This whole blinkin’ joint is full of telephones--
--and not one of ’em’s connected!
What kinda cockeyed looney would…?
You’re not Beryl. Sorry, I thought you were Beryl.
Beryl? Is that you? I was voiding. I didn’t hear y--oh.
{ 79 }
What a shame. I work for the phone company. I get an employee discount.
Are you here to steal from me… or kill me, or anything? Nah. Well, that’s a relief. Could you use a new phone?
I bought all these as gifts for people--then I realized I didn’t know any people. By the way, my name is Brad White. Nice to meet you.
uh… not really, no.
Duke Duck.
Uh, Brad… there’s a corporation and a dog on my tail. I need to lay low for a while… You came to the right place, Duke. Nobody knows I’m alive. they’ll never find you here.
Actually, I exaggerated. One person knows I’m alive. Beryl Mudge. She lives upstairs. I have a crush on her. In fact, I bought her a very special phone--’cause she’s like my very own Vanilla Cupcake.
Care for some coffee?
Yeah? Personally, I’m partial to tarts.
uh…
No, no--Vanilla Cupcake is a little fantasy girl--the sweetest, most charming little thing. This telephone looks just like her. And it’s scented with the soothing aroma of Vanilla-like all her products.
{ 80 }
Here. Take a whiff. She brings out the most lovable, vulnerable side of everyone.
…Woblina Strangelegs addresses the press at Godcorp Headquarters.
Mean-
while, on Long Island...
Medea Souvlakis, a convicted childmurderess, was hired as part of Godcorp’s pioneering equal opportunity program for ex-offenders. We never dreamed she would repay our generosity by slaughtering two policemen and endangering other innocent lives!
Management is shocked and appalled by Medea’s unauthorized actions.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, if you’ll come with me…
We offer our condolences to the slain officers’ families--and hereby remand Medea to the custody of the police.
Lies!! All Lies!! They paid me to do this company’s
KILLING!!!
…I would like to conclude this briefing on a positive note.
You’ll PAY for this, Strangelegs!! Mommie doesn’t forget!!!
{moan} How tragic. We had no idea she was so… unstable.
{ 81 }
{ 82 }
{ 83 }
We’re taking every precaution, just to be safe…
The Pakhmani regime {tee hee} banned all Vanilla Cupcake {hee} products in Hoqoom.
Dr. Roxnitz--who is that anorexic bitch? How dare she suggest I’d let any harm come to my child! Now, Jewel-keep out of the Vanilla Cupcake spotlight! As far doesn’t have a as the public is mother! concerned--
Aren’t you {hee} risking the child’s life, sending her there?
Excuse me. I don’t know why I’m so giddy…! …but it’s really unnecessary. People are the same everywhere, and people love Vanilla CupcakeTM.
For them, she lives in a fantasy world-without pain or sorrow.
Thank you all for coming. There will be Vanilla CupcakeTM dolls and copies of her itinerary for you at the front gate.
That’s the illusion that moves the merchandise.
Well! Now We know whose side you’re on, doctor!
Try to be gentle with us at six and eleven, okay?
When the
reporters have gone…
Pulled your universal-jointed tush out of the furnace, didn’t I, strangelegs?
Maybe you can return the favor, someday--let ’em suck your glands dry, instead of mine!
{ 84 }
That reminds me, Roxnitz-will another glandular tap be necessary before she leaves on the tour? No--not ’til she comes home. In fact, we’ve put the child through more than enough torment for several weeks of production.
Now, now… it won’t Oh, funSies! More pain! be as bad as all that, I can really look forward Vanilla CupcakeTM. to coming home now-after laying my life on You’ll also be the line for Godcorp! taping for your first Saturday morning TV Show!
You should caution your daughter not to be… difficult, Jewel. The company’s interests in Hoqoom extend beyond selling toys. She isn’t difficult, Miss Strangelegs! Really! It’s just the pressure she’s been under--!
Yeah! Barfing up sweetness for 20-million preschool suckers! Wowee!
That’s a pail of pee-pee, Mama! I’m sick of lookin’ at my own ugly face! Sis says I’m a voodoo doll for every kid in America!
None o’ your beeswax! An’ stop calling me that!! My name’s Opal-without after it!
TM
How’d you like it if I always said after your name?!?
TM
Don’t cry, Va-Opal. You’re a very valuable property, you know…!
Pookface PackerPookface Packer-
TM!!
We have to protect the trademark…!
TM!!!
Have you been getting letters from your sister again, Vanilla CupcakeTM?
Why don’t you terminate the little snot--replace her with a computergenerated graphic?
Well… see that she behaves in Hoqoom. MR. Upwind will be counting on it.
Can’t be done. The pheromones, remember? And it’s unthinkable from a marketing standpoint.
Relax. You saw how she handled the press. The tantrums are strictly for our benefit.
Cartoons can’t make personal appearances --she can. It’s a major element in our positioning strategy.
She doesn’t want to end up like her sister…
…and she knows her mother hasn’t changed.
{ 85 }
A Short while later… Beryl and I have spoken only rarely. She is a very private person--and quiet, like me.
--A telephone in the likeness of--
Yes? who is it…? Beryl? It’s Brad… from downstairs.
{UNNNGH}
Look. I have brought you a present--
uhhuh.
But I dream about her, frequently.
Get that monstrosity out of my sight!!
Or I’ll tear it to bits with my teeth--
NOW!!
--and shove its extremities down your sniveling throat!!
Shut up! Go away!
DIE!!
So much for romance. Let’s go home, Brad.
Beats me. I’ll ask her.
{ 86 }
No!! {sob} I wouldn’t offend Beryl for anything--!! What did I do wrong??
One more step… and they can send you back to the company in several small boxes!
Duke’s eyes dart from Beryl to the photos on her walls.
Pardon the intrusion, lady, but…
They
comprise a corporate rogues gallery…
…that includes Woblina, Medea, and other familiar faces from Destroyer Lawyer’s file on Godcorp. Don’t waste a good grenade, kiddo!
Judgin’ from your decor-we’re on the same side!
Stop right where you are!
{sob} It’s true, Beryl... I’ll always be on your side… any side you want…! {sob}
I--I’m sorry. I go a little… berserk, I guess... when I see those awful images… of my sister.
Vanilla Cupcake is your sister--?
It’s not “thrilling”, you nitwit!
It’s revolting-humiliating!! You don’t know-nobody knows, except me-what they put her through--
--so they can make their millions!
D-Don’t pull the pin… please? You have a celebrity in the family! How thrilling!
{ 87 }
{nnpp}
You see, my sister Opal and I are freaks. Our bodies secrete an unusual pheromone…!
“From birth, I had a peculiar effect on people. the maternity ward nurses became very possessive of me. They refused to let anyone else--even my parents--hold me. I smelled just like cherries, sweet, luscious cherries.
That’s a biological signal from one member of a species to another--like a male cat’s spray--or a mating odor.
They say that’s why some people seem unnaturally attractive-they give off more pheromones.
“As I got older the problem got worse. At school, the kids and the teachers hovered around me constantly-sniffing me, petting me.
“Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins… they all wanted to hug and snuggle and touch and smother me with love! “I never had room to breathE!
“On the other hand, I could do no wrong. Mama and dad couldn’t bear to spank me. Even deliberate acts of destruction only evoked indulgent smiles.
“I lit up a lot of faces in my neighborhood.
“When Mama got pregnant with Opal, it sent him over the edge--and out the door.
“Of course, as soon as I was gone, the effect wore off. my father sustained several painful beatings.
“Mama herself was stronger, though.
“so did his checkbook.
{ 88 }
“She didn’t snap until after Opal was born. “Opal smelled like vanilla.
“But this time, events took a different turn. A doctor on the hospital staff noticed the phenomenon.
“While Mama watched, we underwent the agony of our first glandular tap.
“He also did research for a local firm involved in genetic engineering…
“… and he envisioned a commercial application for our unusual body chemistry.
“Spoot isolated the pheromone, but their plan to use it in colognes and perfumes failed. They couldn’t synthesize it--or deodorize it. “And no adult wants to smell like cherries or vanilla--even if it’s supposed to enhance their sex life.
“The project was shelved… until 1980. Then, after a scandal over unauthorized experiments in Simi Valley, California…
“It took the Packers, Mead and Ned, to find the commercial application that had eluded Spoot: Dilute the pheromone. Use it to scent children’s toys. “Entertainment Concepts would package us as a sister act--Vanilla Cupcake and Cherries Jubilee--to promote the merchandise.
“…the company changed hands.
{ 89 }
“--ten years of those excruciating glandular taps! I wouldn’t let Opal go through that torture… so I kidnapped her! I stupidly thought my pheromones would keep even the police from getting mad at me.
“Dad had long since vanished, along with any child support payments… and Mama’s conscience had gone the way of her sanity. “The Packers were offering fame, showbiz, and financial security. Mama liked that. She signed us up for ten years--
“Unfortunately, forewarned was forearmed. Medical Concepts designed a filtration mask that neutralized the effect.
“Mama and Godcorp got Opal… and rather than pressing charges against me…
“I wasn’t exactly a model of co-operation… but on one of those rare nights when I hadn’t punched out any nurses, they granted me TV privileges. “There was Opal--as Vanilla Cupcake-smiling and singing about friendship with icing on top. My blood froze.
“...they gave me an allexpense-paid trip to the loony bin. “Godcorp footed the bill. They didn’t want me coddled in some progressive institution. They wanted me far out of the way.
“All I could think about was how much glandular substance it took to scent an entire product line.
“That night, I made my escape…
{ 90 }
“… and they’ve been hunting me ever since. They thought I’d come crawling back, weak and contrite, begging for mercy. That’s what Godcorp expects from everyone. “but their cruelties only hardened my body and my resolve.”
They also left a When I saw few psychological that telephone, scars. I’m a I was sure raving paranoid you’d been sent --and prone to by Godcorp to outbursts of murder me. violence.
…but tonight they announced they’re sending Opal on a “Goodwill Tour” to Hoqoom, a country on the verge of a very bloody revolution.
Like it or not, They’re going to have to have their sister act.
CHERRIES JUBILEE is going to Hoqoom!
They’ll expect me to be angry. they’ll want to assuage that anger with a bullet.
Fine. Let them try.
And my little sister will be free… or certain persons will be dead.
They haven’t tried anything for a while…
Still on my side, boys…?
Now, they’re after me--for reasons too numerous to mention. I got nothin’ to lose by takin’ the offensive. Count me in.
Those twolegged scumwads killed a friend of mine, lady. I couldn’t do much for him.
Hoqoom:
Uh…!
O n the desert outskirts of the capital, Booster Cogburn plies his technique of gentle persuasion on General Yaousah Abuuk…! There’s the plane that’ll take us to Switzerland, General--for your meeting with MR. Upwind.
You should be honored. Godcorp’s chairman doesn’t take time for every yellowbellied terrorist, y’know! I saw you riddled with bullets …I saw you fall 23 stories and land on your head…!
You cannot be alive, MR. Cogburn, therefore, I pay you no heed.
{ 91 }
Hey… you paying’ attention, General?
“Offhand, effendi--I’d say Pakhmani’s ghost Brigade!”
Anything you say, General--as long as you heed ol’ Betsy, here. Now, get movin’! Looks like we’re in for a noisy send-off!
Wh-what is it? Who’s coming…?!
Inside, General! I’ll hold ’em off while you get airborne!
If I want my employee rights--I gotta make good my employee wrongs!
Are you mad?! You’ll be shot to pieces-again!!
I’m a company man, General--an’ I could cost the company a plane, ’cause I botched your security!
Cogburn crumples to the ground. The desert greedily drinks his blood. The Pakhmani troops pay him no further notice, and General Abuuk cannot see what happens next:
The dead man’s
spine rives the unliving flesh and muscle of his back… freeing itself from the corpse to begin a hideous, slithering journey back to the city.
{ 92 }
And back in Manhattan...
The cherry-bombs strung on my belt can flambé a human being.
Not quite the charming, vulnerable “Cherries Jubilee” they meant to create!
The cherry jawbreaker on my necklace is five pounds of solid iron.
People like me, remember? They enjoy doing favors for me.
I, for one, would go to the ends of the earth for you, Beryl. I’d have to walk, though.
Impressive. But where’s your transportation? Brad says Hoqoom is halfway around the world.
See? I’ve grown up a bit-and learned how to use my ability on people like airline pilots.
You got a large problem--
{gasp} A Cogburn!
WRONG,
Getting to Hoqoom will be no problem.
sister!!
No sweat, Sweets!
Duck! Think fast!
--an’ I’m it!!
At this game, I’m practically telepathic!
{ 93 }
But suddenly--at the window--
--an’ we know how easily you make allies! That’s why I didn’t come alone!
Should’a kept yer eyes on me, Honey-Pie! We knew you were no pushover--
Well, whaddaya know… the Duck, too!
And a witness!
You can say that again! You’re the only person I’ve ever seen arrive --en masse!!
We got us some heavy death to deal out!
I’ll spear the bird! You guys {heh} divvy up the girl!!
{ 94 }
{gnngph}
{ 95 }
Jack Kirby began drawing this final panel for page 1 of Destroyer Duck #4, but decided to depict a different angle, and redrew it.
Above are just a few samples of Steve Gerber’s detailed panel breakdowns and script, for page one of Destroyer Duck #4 [at right]. To supplement this book, you can download a PDF file of other Gerber plot synopses, panel breakdowns, and scripts from Destroyer Duck at: www.twomorrows.com/media/Gerber.pdf { 96 }
[
“Why mope around like an ol’ wet mop? You can have fun that’ll never stop! Spread niceness around in a big fat glop! And you’ll have a friendship with icing on top!
“In the whole wide world, you can never flop, wherever you go, wherever you stop! Just smile as sweet as a lollipop, and you’ll find friendship with icing on top!
| “People are the same from bottom to top,
“Why, Vanilla Cupcake, that was a swell song!”
[
|
|
[
|
rich man, poor man, president, cop! They all need love--lots ’n lots! So give ’em friendship with icing on top! ”
“Golly wogs, MR. President! Thank you so very much! I love you!”
[
“Ah… they’re watching us coast-to-coast, Sweetheart!”
[
“MR. Packer, thank you for the opportunity to meet this little lady.” “On behalf of Godcorp, thank you, MR. President-for allowing Vanilla CupcakeTM to take her message of friendship to strife-torn Hoqoom.”
“Well, Godcorp and Vanilla Cupcake are what this nation stands for, MR. Packer. I hope you’ll communicate that to the people of the Middle East.”
{ 97 }
“G’bye, MR. President! Here comes our helicopter! Cupcake Keen!”
As Mead Packer and his charming, vulnerable licensing bonanza depart for Dulles Airport and their flight to Hoqoom…
SPINELESS W
{ 98 }
WONDERS …four other Godcorp employees, all named Cogburn, invade the Manhattan apartment of Vanilla Cupcake’s sister--
Duke! Brad! Shatter their kneecaps, shoot off their hands, immobilize them--!! --But don’t try to them!
KILL
CHERRIES JUBILEE!
If you say so, lady-but there not exactly pleadin’ for mercy…!
{ 99 }
That’s a cliche´, Cogburn--
Stop squirmin’, worm! Look me in the eye! Die like a man! C-couldn’t I just g-go downstairs and d-decay in my ap-p-partment…?
--but then, what can you expect from a walking redundancy?
Die like a
DESSERT, Cogburn--
Let me show you something original--one of my
CHERRY BOMBS!
Too late, worm--you’ve seen too much!
What’s with the sudden change of heart, Red? I thought we weren’t supposed to kill ’em!
The little red incendiary device finds its mark, and--
Right! Never kill a Cogburn…
{nggph}
WOW…! …unless all you’re planning to leave behind is ashes!
{ 100 }
Outside…
Ashes.
Yes, Brad. otherwise, they begin rebirthing.
Yes, Brad. They become pregnant with… themselves.
Rebirthing.
Taxi!
Where to?
YES,
J.F.K.--The Air Parongus hangar!
Brad!! Parongus.
Incidentally, how’re we gonna pay for the ride--let alone a plane flight?
Leave it to my pheromones. By the time we arrive, the driver will do anything for me.
Parongus.
I’ll believe it when I see it. Now, what’s the scoop on these Cogburn creeps?
They’re Godcorp company men--born and bred in the laboratories of Medical Concepts, LTD.
When Godcorp acquired Spoot Pharmaceuticals in 1980, they immediately went to work applying Spoot’s advanced bio-technology.
“The Cogburns are genetic replications of a Godcorp employee who mysteriously resigned after years of loyal service. He was never seen again…
“...except through a microscope, as a specimen of D.N.A.
{ 101 }
“But his facsimiles are everywhere. Godcorp uses them like freelance agents--shuttling them all over the globe, from one hot spot to the next... “...under conditions a man with any real sense of self-worth would refuse to tolerate.
“Hoqoom is probably crawling with them.
“Each Cogburn carries within it, the seed of its own replacement!
“Naturally, the Cogburns themselves remain ignorant of all this.
“When a Cogburn dies, its spine tears free of its body... hides in a dark place... and grows another spineless form to wear it!
“The machismo posturing, the overblown ego, and the company man mentality are all artificially encoded in the genes.
{ 102 }
“Notice I said ’facsimiles!’ They couldn’t precisely duplicate the original.
“They were able to imbue the copies with his loyalty to the company and his severe ascetic temperament...
“They never question what the company tells them, because to do so would threaten their self-image.
“...but not his intelligence.
“The scientists compensated for those deficiencies by redesigning the Cogburns... in a quasi-human form they called a pregnate.
“The copies were always stupider... incapable of independent thought...
“...and mindlessly self destructive.
“Sooner or later any inquiry would lead them to a disturbing truth:
“That humans exist who possess the capacity to create something new-something beyond a flawed replication of what’s gone before.
“A Cogburn assumes everyone is configured that way, so it remains stable.
“Confronted with the reality... well, no one knows what would happen if a Cogburn’s ego were ever seriously threatened.”
“And that would pose an even more threatening question-because the Cogburns were designed with no genitals.
{ 103 }
With that genetic structure... they might unbirth themselves--
And the control tower. And a plane. And a chain link fence...
--and maybe take a few innocent victims along just for giggles.
...toward which we are barreling at an alarming velocity.
Parongus. There it is. I see the hangar.
I asked you a question, ya lunatic!!
{gnaagph}
HEY!!
ANSWER ME!!
What the flamin’ hell are you
DOING?!?
{quaaagh}
Here’s your answer, Duckhead!
Uranus P. Chicago--!! Yah, yah. Enforcement Concepts had me hang around the neighborhood--in case the Cogburns failed to squish the cherry lady!
{ 104 }
An’ you can bet your ass-feathers, I won’t fail!
I’m gonna RAM us smack into the landing gear of that 747--!
We’ll all buy the farm together--sort of like a commune!
No use trying to escape. You’re trapped.
It’ll be my final gesture of love for Mariel Hemingway!
The doors lock electronically--with a little red button on the steering wheel!
Only I can let you out, and I regretfully decline.
Ooh--das boot.
But too late, Cherry-Lady! HERE COMES DEATH!!
I got ‘im. press the button!
Done! Let’s Blow!!
{ 105 }
IMPACT! The hood of the
taxi crunches like a nutshell under the weight of the jumbo jet!
An instant later,
Uranus P. Chicago is reduced to nothing more than a red stain and an unpleasant memory.
Another instant later: The taxi’s gas tank explodes... cracking The Stem of The landing gear.
The airplane topples-one wing shattering as it strikes the ground! Its twin jet engines blast apart like giant grenades, hurling smoke and flames and fragments of themselves into the night.
{ 106 }
The sound is so loud,
it cannot be heard-only felt, as though the very planet were shaking itself to pieces.
Then... stillness... and the crackle of flames... and...
{quaaah}
{ 107 }
{ 108 }
{ 109 }
PABLO!
Hours later,
somewhere over the stormy Atlantic...
WAKE UP! No!! I do not dare-Now While We are still airborne--!
But hab no fear, Cherries! I yam a suporlative pilot despite my quorks!
We got problems, lady. With refueling stops in the Azores, Morocco and Tunisia, we’ll make Hoqoom in 37 hours...
{owweee}
...roughly 13 hours after your sister’s jet!
My tolerance for eccentricity wanes at 20,000 feet, Pablo. I said, wake up!
{gnaaagh}
Great! Pablo’s drunk, Brad’s over the brink, and Beryl’s blinded by obsession!
It’d be suicide, crossing a street with this bunch...
Can’t be helped. The alternative was to trust a corporate airline...!
...let alone trying to pull off a rescue mission. I’ll haveta take command when we hit Hoqoom. Which means I gotta stop thinking about the Cogburns... and that bioengineering stuff...
If what occurred to me is true--nah! It’s too blamed crazy!
{ 110 }
Lower Manhattan: The sleek black Lawmobile of Destroyer Lawyer Holmes pays a call at the Bowery Hills Hotel...! Think, Quentin! When did you last see Duke...?
So’s ev’rybody in this fleabag, pal. If dey wuzn’t, dey’d be at da Sherry Nederland. I just {hic} figgered Duke checked out!
{hic} Gimme a break, Mac... I ain’t seen nuttin’ clearly--fer years!
I gave ’is bed ta Bad Boris, da mad Russki... it wouldn’a been healthy to toin ’im down...!
But this is urgent! He could be in very serious trouble!
All I’ve got to go on is that story in the papers--about a streetfight between Medea Souvlakis and a short person in a duck mask.
This isn’t good! There’s been no word from Duke since Godcorp’s last attempt on his life...
...almost two days ago!
“SABOTAGED!!”
No further questions-sucker!
{ 111 }
I wonder if... great flaming torts! The temp gauge! The Lawmobile’s been--
As the exploding Lawmobile illuminates the Bowery midnight, dawn breaks over Hoqoom.
--and is due to arrive at Hoqoom airport in two hours.
A splendor of greetings, General. All goes according to plan! Vanilla Cupcake has departed the U.S.--
=
Indeed--in a speech on national television! The tyrant decried the blasphemy of scented toys and the dolls in the child’s image! He called her “Satan’s malodorous daughter”--and made threats upon her life!
Good. He is irrigating his pants.
Excellent, Ashmet! And what of the abominable Pakhmani? Has his vile tongue yet addressed the matter?
In so agitated a state, he is bound to make mistakes...
Correct, Ashmet. And perhaps we shall let him.
If he were to assassinate the child, he would be impaled on the pike of world opinion...!
So how’d your meeting go with MR. Upwind, General...?
So tell the boys to lower their rifles, huh? We’re all on the same team.
He speaks the truth Ashmet. Tomorrow evening, Godcorp willing, we shall have an A-Bomb in our arsenal. We do need his employers... until then.
Cogburn!!
ALIVE--?!?
Dead, I’m not much use to the company--and you need the company, General.
{ 112 }
I’m not stupid, General. Just wipe the sneer off your face-along with them whiskers. We gotta consider Cupcake’s delicate skin--get me?
Of course. You’re to protect your company’s investment.
Two hours later: A clean-
shaven General Abuuk... the Hoqoom Liberation Front Band... and a pre-selected contingent of shoeless Hoqoomite children participate in the tiny nation’s first media event.
Reporters from thirty nations lap up the simple, yet touching proceedings on film and video tape.
We bring you desert flowers, Vanilla Cupcake! We love you!
GollyWogs!! I’m so happy to be here. I love you, too!
General Abuuk, here’s a big kiss--full of friendship with icing on top--from America to good old Hoqoom!
Why, thank you, Vanil-What’s that...?!
{ 113 }
I knew it... I knew it... !!
Pakhmani’s ghost brigades!! Take cover--at once!!
Abuuk is among the
first to fall, swearing vengeance even as a bullet creases his skull.
The Cogburn follows suit--but his oath catches on the bullet in his throat.
{ 114 }
Eyes wide with tears and terror, Cupcake flees the violence...
But Abuuk’s warning comes
too late. The bullets are already flying... the grenades are already bursting... the blood already spilling.
Pakhmani also knows how to stage a media event!
...but it dogs her patent leather heels!
There is no escape for you, child of Satan!
The sublime Pakhmani has decreed your death!
{ 115 }
From hiding,
Mead Packer watches, aghast. he may never again see his valuable trademark alive.
Jewel Mudge’s
blood runs cold with fear. Advised of the danger, she nevertheless consented to bring her daughter to Hoqoom. Now, what will people think of her?
Several hours later, on another runway in Tunis...
Hah! Fasten jour seatbelts! The next stop ees Hoqoom!
Just get us there in one piece, Pablo!
He really is a capable pilot, Duke. He just--hey! Something worrying you?
I don’t follow you...
Yeah, something crazy, about the Cogburns... an’ that genetic science... ...an’ how you said they could screw around with the facsimile’s memory.
Look, if they can duplicate pink primates, how much more difficult could it be to duplicate a duck? ...especially a little duck...
...an’ if the duplicate didn’t know it was a duplicate...
What are you getting at? Something that Godcorp cut open bled to death on my carpet awhile back. I thought that something was the little guy.
What if the little guy is...alive??
Now, though, all my deductive instincts are startin’ to get this funny itch...
NEXT ISSUE:
THE ASTONISHING CONCLUSION:
{ 116 }
The series’ real-life denouement comes into focus in this 1983 Gerber letter. { 117 }
[above] Gerber’s instructions for Kirby’s cover of their final issue. Alas, the logo wasn’t altered as indicated on the published cover. { 118 }
{ 119 }
[above and below] Unused panels from #5.
[bottom] In his 1970s Marvel Comics Defenders series, Gerber introduced the “Elf With A Gun” -- a character that randomly appeared and murdered people with no explanation. (Steve later said the Elf was simply, “a metaphor for the chaotic and inexplicable nature of existence.”). He left Marvel before resolving that sub-plot (another writer had the Elf run over by a truck), so if Kirby had finished this abandoned sequence, we suspect it would’ve shown Duke turning the tables and blowing this “little guy” away.
{ 120 }
DESTROYER DUCK!
Feathered fury in the heat of holocaust!!
Created By
STORY By
STEVE GERBER AND Jack Kirby
STEVE GERBER & BUZZ DIXON
Writer
Artist
Alfredo Alcala, original Inker Peter Iro, Original letterer ODERFLA, tsiroloc lanigiro
“SHATTERER OF WORLDS!” Godcorp has dispatched charming, vulnerable Vanilla CupcakeTM on a goodwill mission to Hoqoom--a Mideast nation on the verge of revolution.
the windup...the pitch... the yaw...!
Now,
Fearful for the
en route, the marauding mallard realizes there may be even more at stake...
child’s life, her sister, Cherries Jubilee, has vowed to rescue her-with the aid of Brad White, Pablo Parongus... and Duke “Destroyer” Duck.
What if he’s still--
ALIVE?!?
What if Godcorp didn’t murder the little guy? What if that’s only what they wanted me to think?
It doesn’t make sense, Duke. Why...? It could’ve been a genetic replication-Like a Cogburn-that bled to death on my floor!
{gnnnfph}
Kirby’s note at top right refers to his suggestion for a new subtitle -- so we’ve replaced the usual “Manslaying Mallard...” line with Jack’s. { 121 }
To snuff Ned Packer, the president of their company? To get them in dutch with the Justice Department?
Maybe the little guy told ’em about me--so they cut up a clone--and sent it back--! Maybe they figured I’d be useful.
And they lured you here, huh? What for?
Listen, sister, I usedta be a cop. And I’m seein’ these corporate types aren’t so damn different from your typical street punk. They’re only out for themselves-they can’t see beyond the ends of their beaks--
I can believe almost anything about Godcorp Duke, but--
--and they’ve always got an angle!
--but you still haven’t learned to think like they do!
Suppose Packer was after the chairmanship --and Sidney Upwind wanted him outta the way?
Minimal, a few middlelevel heads roll, and even if a guy like Upwind gets canned---you can bet he’s got a golden parachute written into his contract.
{QUAARRGH} Or say there was a takeover bid they were tryin’ to squelch? a convenient government probe would send investors running! But, Duke, the risks--!
{ 122 }
Don’ whorry, Dock, I hab eb’rytheen honder {brrrepp} control...!
Everything but the plane and your drinking!
Hah! I am fooly alort! I hoord eb’ry whord jou said back there!
I seempathize wit’ jou, Dock!
Speakin’ of parachutes...! How so?
I got a dead guy who was like a brotter to me, too. Hees name was Pedro Parongus.
PABLO!!
He was my brotter. They blew hees brains out.
Who did--?
The guerrillas, the army, the left, the right--who knoss? My country ees full o’ guys who got the people’s welfare at heart.
{ 123 }
The same could be said of Hoqoom. There, moments ago, the
arrival of Vanilla CupcakeTM was transformed into a bloodbath--and Cupcake herself taken hostage--by the nation’s fanatical leader, Pakhmani the Devourer.
Abominable tyrant!! Oozing sore on a camel’s left rear flank!!
Hear me Pakhmani! I--Yaousah Abuuk of the Hoqoom Liberation Front-swear by my ancestors’ beards to eradicate you!!
Jewel Mudge, Cupcake’s
mother, can already see the headlines in the tabloids, comparing her--unfavorably--to Joan Crawford. she shudders.
Mead Packer, Godcorp’s merchandising wizard, gapes at the carnage, appalled. even if the child survives, the fantasy that sold her products may not.
But not everyone is so distraught as it might appear.
Pakhmani plays into your hands, General. if he murders the child, he will be universally reviled. Correct, Ashmet-and none will blame us for employing the ultimate threat!
But say no more... not in MR. Cogburn’s presence. he has already returned from the grave twice.
e} ok {p ke} {po
{po ...To end his thricecursed rule!
{ 124 }
ke}
His corpse could be eavesdropping, even now!
I am aware how valuable your Cupcake is to Godcorp, MR. Packer --and, of course, to you, Mrs. Mudge.
I shall do all in my power to effect her return, alive and well.
Of course, right this-Thank you, General. Is there a phone nearby? I should notify corporate headquarters...
Oh... the Cogburn.
“Packer! What unholy thing is happening to him--?”
...to find a dark place where it can grow another body. “The spine is disengaging from the corpse...”
No, Jewel... it’s corporate creativity. The same creativity that turned your daughter’s glandular secretions into a billiondollar marketing concept.
--genetically-engineered to display absolute, unquestioning loyalty to the company. flaming stool of Satan... !
It’s HIDEOUS!
I assumed you’d been briefed on the cogburns, General. They’re self-replicating quasihumans--
When things look bleakest, Jewel, have faith in Godcorp. this company’s capable of anything.
Kirby’s pencil photocopies end after this page, so the remainder of this issue comes mostly from scans of the original inked art. { 125 }
{ 127 }
{ 128 }
{ 129 }
{ 130 }
{ 131 }
{ 132 }
{ 133 }
{ 134 }
{ 135 }
{ 136 }
{ 137 }
{ 138 }
{ 139 }
{ 140 }
AFTERWORD by BUZZ DIXON My professional comics career started with Jack Kirby. It’s been downhill ever since. I kid, I kid; I’ve worked with some truly great talents and phenomenal names in my time and am proud of my association with them. But when you start off at the top of the mountain, the king of the hill, the literal king of comics, well… it changes your perspective. As a freelancer in 1980, I wrote some segments for the Ruby-Spears show Heathcliff And Dingbat and Joe Ruby -- in a lapse of judgment I’m sure he regretted for years to come -- offered me a staff writer position. I was already ensconced and working on Mighty Man And Yukk segments for The Plastic Man Comedy/ Adventure Show when Joe made another, much smarter hire: Steve Gerber. I knew Steve by reputation, of course. Everybody in the professional sci-fi/comics community at that time knew and followed Howard The Duck. There’s an expression I frequently use: “The jazz musician’s jazz musician.” By this I mean someone
doing groundbreaking work in a particular genre or medium, who isn’t recognized by mainstream audiences, but immediately gets the attention of every serious practitioner in that field. Quintessential literal example? Sun Ra, the jazz great always too far out for corporate minds to grasp, but the pathfinder who showed dozens of later -- and ironically, more successful -- jazz musicians new techniques and styles to explore. Those musicians took their lessons from Sun Ra and reinterpreted them in new ways more palatable to mainstream audiences. Steve was the Sun Ra of comics. I remember being delighted and excited when Joe told us Steve would be coming onboard. I’d been a longtime fan of Howard The Duck and before that found myself enjoying many comics he wrote for Marvel (Iron Man #56 is a work of art, a thing of beauty, and a joy forever). Exactly how we were introduced at Ruby-Spears fades in memory, but I do remember telling Steve how happy I was to be working with him. “If you need anyone to show you anything, feel free to ask,” I said. “I’ll be happy to help.” Steve looked askance at me. “Are you saying
[above] Splash page from #6, with Gary Kato’s pencils. This shows the level of consistency Alfredo Alcala’s inks brought to the book. { 141 }
you’re offering to help me write scripts?” “What?!?!? No! I meant showing you where the supply room is, things like that. Good lord, I’m not going to try to tell Steve Gerber how to write a story!” Steve chuckled at the misunderstanding and in the words of Casablanca, that was the start of a beautiful friendship. Now, to be utterly fair, Steve didn’t come to RubySpears in hopes of becoming an animation superstar (he did, but that was incidental). His primary objectives were (a) keeping a roof over his head and food on his table while (b) suing Marvel Comics for possession of Howard The Duck -- and not necessarily in that order. The Ruby-Spears gig covered his living expenses, but didn’t provide enough to battle the “house of ideas.” To do that, Steve indirectly helped jumpstart the 1980s indie comics scene with Destroyer Duck -- “Manslaying Mallard On A Mission Of Vengeance” as one early iteration went. Eclipse Comics published Destroyer Duck, among the very first indie comics publishers (as differentiated from their predecessors, the underground comix scene). Steve pitched Destroyer Duck to them as part of his F.O.O.G. campaign
(“Friends Of Ol’ Gerber”) to raise funds to take a legal swing at Marvel. His cheerful creative partner in his quest for justice? None other than the king himself, Jack Kirby. And oh, yeah, was Jack ever delighted to help. (If you’re interested in how Jack and I became friends before I even realized he was Jack Kirby, look up the story in Jack Kirby Collector #79.) So while Steve helped crank out RubySpears shows, he also assembled a crew to do Destroyer Duck. In addition to Jack and Alfredo Alcala doing pencils and inks on Destroyer Duck itself, Steve also had Steve Leialoha helping on the inks, Gordon Kent (one of Ruby-Spears’ storyboard artists and later a writer/director there) handling the coloring, and Tom Orzechowski doing the lettering, (And that’s the Destroyer Duck story in the first issue; Steve also recruited Mark Evanier, Shary Flenniken, Carol Lay, Marty Pasko, Scott Shaw!, Dan Spiegel, Joe Staton, and some guy named Sergio Aragonés to help by contributing other stories to the book, including the very first appearance of Groo the Wanderer. Yowza, talk about a powerhouse line-up!) I, of course, played no part in this. I remained busy writing scripts for The Puppy’s New Adventures and the animated Mork & Mindy show while co-workers Steve, Jack, and Gordon (not to mention freelancers Mark and Marty) talked about their wonderful side gig. To be honest, I felt envious. TV animation in that day put a lot of constraints on creativity and Joe Ruby -- well, I loved Joe, so let’s just say he was one of the most unique creative talents I ever dealt with -- made me look with longing eyes at all the fun Steve and Jack and the others
{ 142 }
were having. I wasn’t in the room when it happened, so to speak, but the door was open and I could see in. Destroyer Duck came out somewhat irregularly for a variety of reasons,* but it’s not unfair to say Steve’s workload and the availability of other creative talents played a big part in that -- Steve settling the Marvel lawsuit on September 24, 1982 playing another. The desire to keep Destroyer Duck going was there, but not the right schedule. Destroyer Duck #5 took a bit of time to bring together, and Steve faced a writing cramp trying to come up with a story that * #1: February 1982 would tie off the original arc and let him #2: January 1983 hand the book over to a new creative team. #3: June 1983 Jack, of course, remained constantly #4: October 1983 in demand not only with his TV animation #5: December 1983 #6: March 1984 work, but other comics projects, and when #7: May 1984 a narrow window of opportunity arose for him to complete the original story, Steve didn’t have a script ready for him. Steve did know, however, that Destroyer Lawyer (one of our good guy allies) needed to reveal how he escaped an ambush in issue #4 and fight the villain who tried to kill him. He asked me, “Could you write a two-page fight scene for Jacky Kirby to draw while I finish the rest of the script?” Does the pope wear a watertight hat in the woods? I jumped at the chance, of course, and wrote a fight scene where every blow Destroyer Lawyer landed while interrogating his would-be assassin was a legal term sound effect like “Plat!” or “Fiat!” Silly? Of course, but like I always say, embrace the absurdity. I had a blast writing the script, I felt humbled for Jack draw it, and best of all, I got paid! Steve liked what I did enough to hand the scripting chores over to me for issues #6 and #7, with Gary Kato doing the penciling. By then, the independent comics market started changing and Eclipse’s interest in continuing Destroyer Duck faded (on the plus side, Frank Miller drew the cover for the last issue, so how cool is that?) So my contribution to Jack Kirby’s run on Destroyer Duck is small, but it’s there. I deeply miss Steve and Jack and Roz and Gordon, and count this as one of my best creative experiences… even if it only lasted two pages. -- Buzz Dixon [top on both pages] A testimonial from Jack, dictated to wife Roz, in honor of Eclipse Comics’ 10th anniversary in 1987. [bottom on both pages] Jack and Roz Kirby at a mid-1980s convention, and Steve Gerber around that same time. {above] Frank Miller’s cover for Destroyer Duck #7, the final issue. { 143 }
OUR ARTISTS AT WAR
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JOHN SEVERIN
TWO-FISTED COMIC BOOK ARTIST
(literally) spineless Booster Cogburn, Medea (a parody of Daredevil’s Elektra), and more! Now, all five Gerber/ Kirby issues are collected--but relettered and reproduced from Jack Kirby’s unbridled, uninked pencil art! Also included are select examples of Alfredo Alcala’s unique inking style over Kirby on the original issues, Gerber’s scripts and plots, an historical Introduction by Mark Evanier (co-editor of the original 1980s issues), and an Afterword by Buzz Dixon (who continued the series after Gerber)! Discover all the hidden jabs you missed when Destroyer Duck was first published in 1982, and experience page after page of Kirby’s powerful, raw pencil art!
TwoMorrows Publishing ISBN-13: 978-1-60549-117-2 ISBN-10: 1-60549-117-9
Raleigh, North Carolina
53195
9 781605 491172
$31.95 in the U.S. ISBN: 978-1-60549-117-2
Printed in China
In the 1980s, writer Steve Gerber [above] was embroiled in a lawsuit against Marvel Comics over ownership of his creation Howard The Duck. To raise funds for legal fees, Gerber asked artist Jack Kirby [right] to contribute to a benefit comic titled Destroyer Duck. Without hesitation, Kirby (who was in his own dispute with Marvel at the time) donated his services for the first issue, and the duo took aim at their former employer in an outrageous five-issue run. With biting satire and guns blazing, Duke “Destroyer” Duck battled the thinly veiled Godcorp (whose infamous credo was “Grab it all! Own it all! Drain it all!”), its evil leader Ned Packer and the
Destroyer Duck and all related characters TM & © the Estate of Steve Gerber & the Rosalind Kirby Trust.
{QUAAAGH!}
DESTROYER DUCK #4
Dialogue Script Pages One through
Z
By STEVE GERBER
June 3, 1983
ECLIPSE ENTERPRISES
DESTROYER DUCK #4 Dialogue Script PAGE ONE
KURT, PLEASE NOTE: Make the gutters SOLID BLACK. Copy will be statted into reverse (white on black) . Letter both regular and bold words slightly heavier than usual. Thanks. -- SG
(1) 1 BLURB:
(MUSICAL NOTES FLOAT AROUND COPY; CUPCAKE SINGING) "Why mope around like an ol’ wet mop? You can have fun that'll never stop! Spread niceness around in a big fat glop! And you'll have FRIENDSHIP WITH ICING ON TOP!
(2)
2 BLURB:
(MUSICAL NOTES FLOAT AROUND COPY; CUPCAKE SINGING) "In the whole wide world you can never flop, Wherever you go, wherever you stop! Just smile as sweet as a lollipop, And you'll find FRIENDSHIP WITH ICING ON TOP!
(3)
3 BLURB:
(MUSICAL NOTES FLOAT AROUND COPY; CUPCAKE SINGING) "People are the same from bottom to top, Rich man, poor man, president, cop! They all need love— LOTS 'N LOTS! So give 'em FRIENDSHIP WITH ICING ON TOP!"
(4) KURT, PLEASE NOTE: Leave 1/2 blank line between these borderless blurbs. Thanks again.—SG
4 BLURB:
(REAGAN SPEAKING) "Why, Vanilla Cupcake, that was a SWELL song!" ( (MORE) )
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
2
PAGE ONE (CONT) (4, cont)
5 BLURB: 6 BLURB:
(CUPCAKE SPEAKING) "GOLLY-WOGS, Mr. President! Thank you so VERY much! I LOVE you!!" (REAGAN SPEAKING) "Ah...they're watching us coast-to-coast , sweetheart...!"
(5)
6 BLURB: 7 BLURB:
(REAGAN SPEAKING) "MR. PACKER, thank you for the opportunity to meet this lovely little lady." (PACKER SPEAKING) "On behalf of GODCORP, thank YOU, Mr. Resident— for allowing Vanilla Cupcake1 to take her message of friendship to strife-torn HOQOOM.
(6)
8 BLURB:
9 BLURB:
(REAGAN SPEAKING) "Well, Godcorp and Vanilla Cupcake are what this nation STANDS FOR, Mr. Packer. I hope you'll communicate that to the people of the Middle East." (CUPCAKE SPEAKING) "G'bye, Mr. President! Here comes our helicopter! CUPCAKEY-KEEN!"
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
3
PAGES TWO & THREE
TITLE:
(ABUTS RIGHT "MARGIN" OF PAGE THREE AND LEFT MARGIN OF PAGE FOUR) SPINELESS WONDERS!
1 BLURB
As MEAD PACKER and his charming, vulnerable LICENSING BONANZA depart for Dulles Airport and their flight to Hoqoom...
2 BLURB:
...four OTHER Godcorp employees, all named COGBURN, invade the Manhattan apartment of Vanilla Cupcake's SISTER— CHERRIES JUBILEE!
3 CHERRIES:
DUKE!
4 CHERRIES:
(BURST)
5 DUKE:
If you SAY so, lady— but they're not exactly pleadin' for MERCY...!
SFX:
BRAAP!! (machine gun) SPONNGG!! (crossbow breaking) KRNCH! (jaw cracking) KRAK! (Duke's gun) BAM!! (Duke's other gun)
CREDITS:
BRAD! Shatter their KNEECAPS— shoot off their HANDS— IMMOBILIZE them—!!
BUT DON'T TRY TO KILL THEM!!
(ON BOOK COVER)
Created by STEVE GERBER & JACK KIRBY Writer Artist
(ON SHEET OF PAPER) ALFREDO ALCALA Inker Yourself, Letterer
Petra Scotese, Colorist
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
4.
PAGE FOUR
(1) 1 COGBURN:
2 BRAD: 3 COGBURN:
Stop squirmin’, worm! Look me in the EYE! Die like a MAN! C-couldn't I just g-go downstairs and d-decay in my ap-p-partment...? Too late, worm— you’ve seen TOO MUCH!
(2) 4 CHERRIES: 5 CHERRIES:
6 CHERRIES:
That's a CLICHE, Cogburn— —but then, what can you EXPECT from a WALKING REDUNDANCY? Let me show you something ORIGINAL— one of my CHERRY BOMBS!
(3)
7 CHERRIES: 8 CHERRIES:
DIE LIKE A DESSERT, COGBURN— (BURST; FLAMING LETTERS, OPEN FOR COLOR) FLAMBEE!!
(4)
9 BLURB: SFX:
10 BRAD: 11 DUKE:
The little red INCENDIARY DEVICE finds its mark, and— SHOOOM! (Cogburn erupts in flames...) AAARRGH (...and finds it painful) (LOWER-CASE LETTERS) =ngggph= Wow...!
(5)
12 DUKE:
13 CHERRIES: 14 CHERRIES:
What's with the sudden change of HEART, red? I thought we weren't supposed to KILL 'em! Right! NEVER kill a Cogburn... ...unless all you're planning to leave behind is ASHES!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
5. PAGE FIVE
(1)
1 BLURB: 2 BRAD: 3 CHERRIES:
Outside... Ashes. Yes, Brad.
Otherwise, they begin REBIRTHING.
(2) 4 BRAD: 5 CHERRIES 6 CHERRIES:
(OFF-PANEL) Rebirthing. Yes, Brad. They become pregnant with...THEMSELVES TAXI!!
(3)
7 DRIVER: 8 CHERRIES: 9 BRAD: 10 DUKE:
Where TO...? J.F.K. — the AIR PORONGUS hangar! Porongus. YES, BRAD!!
(4)
11 DUKE:
12 BRAD: 13 CHERRIES:
Incidentally, how're we gonna PAY for the RIDE— let alone a plane flight? Porongus. Leave it to my PHEROMONES. By the time we arrive, our driver will do ANYTHING for me.
(5)
14 DUKE: 15 CHERRIES:
16 CHERRIES:
I'll believe it when I SEE it. Now what's the scoop on these COGBURN creeps? They're Godcorp COMPANY MEN— born and bred in the laboratories of MEDICAL CONCEPTS, LTD. When Godcorp acquired SPOOT PHARMACEUTICALS in 1980, they immediately went to work APPLYING Spoot's advanced BIO-TECH NOLOGY .
(6)
17 BLURB:
(NO BORDER AROUND BLURB; CHERRIES SPEAKING) "The Cogburns are GENETIC REPLICATIONS of a Godcorp employee who mysteriously resigned after years of loyal service.
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
6.
PAGE FIVE (CONT) (6, cont)
18 BLURB: 19 BLURB:
"He was never seen AGAIN... "...except through a MICROSCOPE, as a specimen of DNA.
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
7
PAGES SIX AND SEVEN
IMPORTANT NOTE: The gutters between panels in this spread should be about HALF the usual width and SOLID BLACK.
(1) 1 BLURB:
2 BLURB:
3 BLURB:
"But his FACSIMILES are everywhere. Godcorp uses them like freelance agents— shuttling them all over the globe, from one HOT-SPOT to the next... "...under conditions a man with any REAL sense of SELF-WORTH would refuse to tolerate. "HOQOOM is probably CRAWLING with them.
2) 4 BLURB:
5 BLURB:
"Notice I said 'FACSIMILES'. They couldn't PRECISELY duplicate the original. "They were able to imbue the copies with his LOYALTY to the company and his severe ASCETIC temperament...
(3)
6 BLURB: 7 BLURB: 8 BLURB:
"...but not his INTELLIGENCE. "The copies were always STUPIDER...incapable of independent thought... "...and mindlessly SELF-DESTRUCTIVE.
(4)
9 BLURB:
"The scientists COMPENSATED for those deficiencies by REDESIGNING the Cogburns... in a QUASI-HUMAN form they called a PREGNATE.
(5)
10 BLURB:
11 BLURB:
"EACH COGBURN CARRIES WITHIN IT THE SEED OF ITS OWN REPLACEMENT. "When a Cogburn dies, its SPINE tears free of its body...hides in a dark place ...and grows ANOTHER SPINELESS FORM to wear it!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
8
PAGES SIX & SEVEN (CONT)
(6)
12 BLURB: 13 BLURB:
"Naturally, the Cogburns themselves remain IGNORANT of all this. "The machismo POSTURING, the overblown EGO, and the ’COMPANY MAN' mentality are all artificially encoded in the genes.
(7)
14 BLURB:
"They NEVER QUESTION what the company TELLS them, because to do so would threaten their SELF-IMAGE.
(8)
15 BLURB:
16 BLURB:
17 BLURB:
"Sooner or later, any inquiry would lead them to a disturbing TRUTH: "That humans exist who possess the capacity to create something NEW— something BEYOND a flawed replication of what's gone before. "And that would pose an even MORE threatening question— because the Cogburns were designed with NO GENITALS.
(9)
18 BLURB: 19 BLURB:
"A Cogburn assumes EVERYONE is configured that way, so it remains STABLE. "Confronted with the REALITY...well, no one KNOWS what would happen if a Cogburn's ego were ever SERIOUSLY threatened."
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
9
PAGE EIGHT
(1)
1 CHERRIES: 2 CHERRIES: 3 BRAD:
With that genetic structure...they might UN-BIRTH themselves— —and maybe take a few innocent VICTIMS along just for giggles. PARONGUS. There it IS. I see the hangar.
(2)
4 BRAD:
5 BRAD:
And the control tower. And a plane. And a chain-link fence... ...toward which we are barrelling at an alarming velocity.
(3)
SFX: 6 DUKE: 7 BRAD:
KRRAASSH!! (FROM INSIDE CAB; BURST) HEY!! WHAT THE FLAMIN' HELL ARE YOU DOING?!? (FROM INSIDE CAB; LOWER-CASE LETTERS) =gnaagph=
(4)
8 DUKE: 9 DUKE:
I asked you a QUESTION, ya lunatic!! (BURST) ANSWER ME!!
(5)
10 URANUS: 11 DUKE: 12 URANUS:
HERE'S your answer, duckhead! =QUAAAGH= URANUS P. CHICAGO—!! Yah, yah. ENFORCEMENT CONCEPTS had me hang around the neighborhood— in case the Cogburns failed to SQUISH the cherry-lady!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
10
PAGE NINE
(1)
1 URANUS: 2 URANUS:
An' you can bet your ass-feathers I WON'T fail! I'm gonna RAM us smack into the LANDING GEAR of that 747—!
(2)
SFX: 3 URANUS: 4 URANUS:
WAK! BASH! We'll all buy the farm TOGETHER— sort of like a COMMUNE! It'll be my final gesture of love for MARIEL HEMINGWAY—!
(3)
5 URANUS: 6 URANUS:
No use trying to ESCAPE. You're trapped. The doors lock ELECTRONICALLY — with a little red button on the STEERING WHEEL!
(4) SFX: 7 URANUS:
8 URANUS:
KRAKSH! Only I can let you out, and I regretfully DECLINE. Ooh. Das boot.
(5) 9 URANUS:
But too late, cherry-lady!
HERE COMES DEATH!!
(6)
10 DUKE: 11 CHERRIES:
I GOT 'im! Press the BUTTON! DONE! Let's BLOW!!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
11
PAGES TEN & ELEVEN
(1) 1 BLURB: 2 BLURB:
(BURST) IMPACT! The hood of the taxi CRUNCHES like a nutshell under the weight of the jumbo jet!
(2)
3 BLURB:
An instant later, Uranus P. Chicago is reduced to nothing more than a RED STAIN and an unpleasant MEMORY.
(3)
4 BLURB: 5 BLURB:
6 BLURB: 7 BLURB:
ANOTHER instant later: the taxi's gas tank EXPLODES...cracking the stem of the landing gear. The airplane TOPPLES— one wing SHATTERING as it strikes the ground! Its twin jet engines BLAST apart like giant grenades, hurling smoke and flames and fragments of themselves into the night! The SOUND is so loud it cannot be HEARD— only FELT, as though the very PLANET were shaking itself to PIECES. (CIRCLE W/IN CIRCLE) Then... stillness... and the crackle of flames...and...
(4) SFX: DUKE:
THOK! =quaaagh=
DESTROYER DUCK #4
Dialogue Script Pages Twelve through Twenty
By STEVE GERBER
June 22, 1983
ECLIPSE ENTERPRISES
12.
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script PAGE TWELVE
(1) 1 BLURB:
2 CHERRIES:
3 BRAD: 4 DUKE:
But the wail of SIRENS drowns out the duck's pained ejaculation... I don't think they've SPOTTED us yet. Let's get OUT of here...! =hggnph= Yeah...guess the RESCUE CREWS will handle the fire.
(2)
5 DUKE: 6 CHERRIES: 7 CHERRIES: SIGN:
How come your far-famed GLANDULAR SECRETIONS fizzled with URANUS? Same reason they're useless against the COGBURNS— —the abnormal brain chemistry of the PSYCHOTIC AIR PARONGUS - PABLO PARONGUS, PROPRIETOR & PILOT
(3)
8 CHERRIES: 9 CHERRIES: 10 PABLO: 11 DUKE: 12 DUKE:
I found that out the HARD way— in the washroom of the REFORMATORY. I— =gasp= (BURST) PABLO—!! NO!! Pah-HAH-bah-loh— SI! That's our PILOT— —a drunken, chain-smoking DWARF?!
(4)
13 PABLO: 14 PABLO: 15 CHERRIES:
=urrp= Don' CHAKE me! PLEASE—! I SPEEL all ofer you—! DEAD MEN don't throw up, Pablo! How could you forget our APPOINTMENT?
(5)
16 CHERRIES: 17 PABLO: 18 PABLO:
SFX:
LOOK at you! You're in no condition to FLY! HAH!! I can't fly in no OTHER condeetion! I'm AFRAID of flying! Now KEES me and hapologize— or I make you go STANDBY! SMOOSH (Pablo kissing helmet) ((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
13.
PAGE TWELVE (CONT)
(6)
19 DUKE: 20 DUKE:
(THOT) (THOT)
This is lookin' grim. VERY grim. Why couldn't she have used her PHEROMONES on the president of TWA...?
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
14.
PAGE THIRTEEN (1) 1 BLURB:
2 UPWIND:
Meanwhile, in an Alpine CHALET owned by the WORLD'S LARGEST CORPORATION... Then GODCORP'S offer interests you, GENERAL ABUUK...?
(2)
3 ABUUK: 4 ABUUK:
5 UPWIND:
Indeed, MR. UPWIND. But in such a... SENSITIVE transaction, one requires ASSURANCES. The HOQOOM LIBERATION FRONT must be certain your company will FULFILL its end of the bargain. The FISSIONABLE MATERIALS you wish to purchase are stored in a vault beneath this structure, General.
(3)
6 UPWIND:
7 WOBLINA: 8 UPWIND: 9 UPWIND:
And our ENERGY CONCEPTS, LTD. subsidiary has prepared a KIT for assembling the DEVICE you plan to build. "DEVICE"—?! Woblina...shh! But we ALSO need assurances, General.
(4)
10 ABUUK: 11 ABUUK:
12 ABUUK:
Then observe! SEREENA—! Tattooed upon Sereena's undulating midriff is a 99-YEAR LEASE, granting Godcorp sole right to develop Hoqoom's PETROLEUM RESOURCES. Is this SATISFACTORY, Mr. Upwind?
5)
14 UPWIND: 15 ABUUK:
16 ABUUK:
I assume she won't object to lying across our COPYING MACHINE...? Nor anywhere ELSE, Mr. Upwind. She is YOURS— a GIFT to seal our bargain! And now, I must hasten home...lest I arrive too late to kiss your CUPCAKE...!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
15
PAGE FOURTEEN (1) 1 BLURB: 2 CHERRIES:
Hours later, somewhere over the stormy ATLANTIC (BURST) PABLO! WAKE UP!! ((OPEN FOR COLOR ))
3 PABLO:
NO!!
I do not DARE— not while we are still AIRBORNE—! !
(2) 4 PABLO: 5 PABLO: SFX: 6 CHERRIES:
But hab no fear, Cherries! I yam a superlative pilot, despike my QUORKS! =OWW-EEE= CHOKK (Elbow to Pablo's head) My tolerance for eccentricity WANES at 20,000 FEET, Pablo! I said— WAKE UP!
(3)
7 DUKE:
8 DUKE: 9 CHERRIES:
We got PROBLEMS, lady. With refueling stops in the Azores, Morocco, and Tunisia, we'll make Hoqoom in 37 HOURS... ...roughly 13 hours AFTER your sister's JET! Can't be helped. The alternative was to trust a CORPORATE airline...!
(4)
10 BRAD: 11 DUKE: 12 DUKE:
=gnnaagh= (THOT) Great. Pablo's DRUNK, Brad's over the BRINK, and Beryl's blinded by OBSESSION. (THOT) It'd be suicide CROSSING A STREET with this bunch...
(5)
13 DUKE:
14 DUKE: 15 DUKE:
...let alone trying to pull off a RESCUE MISSION. I'll haveta take command when we hit Hoqoom. Which means I GOTTA stop thinking (THOT) about the Cogburns... and that BIOENGIN EERING stuff...! If what occurred to me is true— (THOT) NAH! It's too blamed CRAZY! (THOT)
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
16.
PAGE FOURTEEN (CONT) (5, cont) 16 MAGAZINE:
(LOGO) LIFE (big black X drawn through logo; under logo, obviously hand-scrawled, as if with Magic Marker:) PARONGUS IN-FLITE MAG
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
PAGE FIFTEEN
1 BLURB:
2 HOLMES:
3 QUENTIN:
Lower Manhattan: the sleek black LAWMOBILE Of DESTROYER LAWYER HOLMES pays a call at the BOWERY HILLS HOTEL...! (FROM HOTEL) THINK, Quentin! When did you last see DUKE...? (FROM HOTEL) =hic= Gimme a break, mac...I ain't seen NUTTIN' clearly— fer YEARS...!
(2) 4 HOLMES:
5 QUENTIN:
But this is URGENT! He could be in very serious TROUBLE! So's EV'RYBODY in dis fleabag, pal. If dey wuzn't, dey'd be at da SHERRY NEDDERLAND. I just =hic= figgered Duke CHECKED OUT...!
(3)
6 QUENTIN:
7 HOLMES:
8 HOLMES:
I gave 'is bed ta BAD BORIS, da mad Russki ...it wouldn'a been HEALTHY ta toin 'im down...! This isn't good. There's been no (THOT) word from Duke since GODCORP'S last attempt on his LIFE... (THOT) ...almost TWO DAYS ago!
(4) 9 HOLMES:
10 HOLMES:
All I've got to go on is that story in the PAPERS— about a STREETFIGHT between MEDEA SOUVLAKIS and a short person in a DUCK MASK. I wonder if— GREAT FLAMING TORTS!! (THOT) The temp gauge! The Lawmobile's been— (THOT)
(5)
11 BLURB: SFX: 12 COGBURN:
(HOLMES THINKING) "—SABOTAGED!!" KABOOOM!! No further questions— SUCKER!
17
18
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
PAGE SIXTEEN (1) 1 BLURB:
2 ASHMET:
3 ASHMET: 4 ABUUK:
As the exploding Lawmobile illuminates the Bowery midnight, DAWN breaks over Hoqoom... A splendor of greetings, General! All goes according to PLAN! Vanilla Cupcake has departed the U.S.— —and is due to arrive at Hoqoom Airport in TWO HOURS. EXCELLENT, Ashmet! And what of the abominable PAHKMANI? Has his vile tongue yet addressed the matter?
(2)
5 ASHMET:
6 ASHMET: 7 ABUUK:
Indeed— in a speech on national television! The tyrant decried the BLASPHEMY of scented toys and dolls in the child's image! He called her "SATAN'S MALODOROUS DAUGHTER" —and made threats upon her LIFE! Good. He is irrigating his PANTS.
(3) 8 ASHMET: 9 ABUUK:
10 ABUUK:
In so agitated a state, he is bound to make MISTAKES...! Correct, Ashmet. And perhaps we shall LET him. If he WERE to assassinate the child, he would be IMPALED on the pike of world opinion...!
(4)
11 COGBURN:
12 ABUUK: 13 COGBURN:
So how'd your MEETING go with Mr. Upwind, General...? (BURST) COGBURN!! ALIVE—?!? DEAD, I'm not much use to the COMPANY— and you NEED the company, General.
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
19.
PAGE SIXTEEN (CONT) (5)
14 COGBURN:
15 ABUUK: 16 ABUUK:
So tell the boys to lower their RIFLES, huh? We're all on the same TEAM. He speaks the TRUTH, Ashmet. Tomorrow evening Godcorp willing, we shall have an A-BOMB in our arsenal. We DO need his employers...until then.
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
20
PAGE SEVENTEEN
(1) 1 COGBURN:
2 COGBURN: 3 ABUUK:
SFX
I'm not STUPID, General. Just wipe the SNEER off your face— along with them WHISKERS. We gotta consider Cupcake's DELICATE SKIN— get me? Of course. You're to PROTECT your company's INVESTMENT. SKRATCH SKRATCH (Cog's hand brushes Abuuk's face)
(2)
4 BLURB:
5 BLURB: 6 CHILD: 7 CUPCAKE:
Two hours later: a clean-shaven General Abuuk...the Hoqoom Liberation Front BAND...and a pre-selected contingent of shoeless Hoqoomite CHILDREN participate in the tiny nation's first MEDIA EVENT. REPORTERS from thirty nations lap up the simple, yet touching proceedings on film and video tape. We bring you DESERT FLOWERS, Vanilla Cupcake! We LOVE you! GOLLY-WOGS!! I'm SO happy to BE here! I love YOU, too!
(3)
8 CUPCAKE: 9 ABUUK:
General Abuuk, here's a BIG KISS— full of friendship with icing on top— from America to good old Hoqoom! Why, thank you, Vanil—
(4)
SFX: 10 ABUUK: 11 CUPCAKE:
(OVERLAPS BALLOON #9) BLAM! BLAM! What's that...?! I knew it...I KNEW IT...!!
BLAM!
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
21.
PAGES EIGHTEEN AND NINETEEN
(1) 1 ABUUK:
2 BLURB:
3 BLURB:
(BURST)
PAHKMANI'S GHOST BRIGADES!! TAKE COVER— AT ONCE 1! But Abuuk's warning comes too late. The BULLETS are already flying...the GRENADES already bursting... the BLOOD already spilling. Pahkmani ALSO knows how to stage a media event:
(2)
4 BLURB:
Abuuk is among the first to FALL, swearing vengeance even as a bullet creases his skull.
(3)
5 BLURB:
The Cogburn follows suit— but his oath catches on the bullet in his THROAT.
(4)
6 BLURB: 7 BLURB:
Eyes wide with tears and terror, Cupcake FLEES the violence... ...but it DOGS her patent-leather heels!
(5)
8 TROOPER: 9 TROOPER:
There is NO ESCAPE for you, child of Satan! The sublime PAHKMANI has decreed your DEATH!
(6)
10 BLURB:
From hiding, MEAD PACKER watches aghast. He may never again see his valuable trademark ALIVE.
(7)
11 BLURB:
JEWEL MUDGE'S blood runs cold with fear. Advised of the DANGER, she nevertheless CONSENTED to bring her DAUGHTER to Hoqoom. NOW, what will people think of her?
22.
Destroyer Duck #4 - Script
PAGE TWENTY
(1) 1 BLURB:
2 PABLO: 3 CHERRIES:
Several hours LATER, on another runway in TUNIS... Fasten jour seatbelts! (FROM COCKPIT) Hah! The nex' stop ees HOQOOM! Just get us there in ONE PIECE, Pablo!
(2)
4 CHERRIES: 5 DUKE: 6 DUKE:
He really IS a capable pilot, Duke. He just— hey! Something WORRYING you? Yeah, something CRAZY. About the Cogburns ...an’ that genetic science... ...an' how you said they could screw around with the facsimiles' MEMORIES.
(3)
7 CHERRIES: 8 DUKE:
9 DUKE: 10 DUKE:
I don't follow you... Look, if they can duplicate PINK PRIMATES, how much MORE difficult could it be...to duplicate a DUCK? Especially a LITTLE duck. An' if the duplicate didn't KNOW it was a duplicate...!
(4)
11 CHERRIES: 12 DUKE:
13 DUKE:
What are you GETTING at...? SOMETHING that Godcorp cut open bled to death on my carpet awhile back. I THOUGHT that something was the LITTLE GUY. Now, though, all my deductive instincts are startin' to get this funny ITCH...!
(5)
14 DUKE: 15 BLURB:
What if the Little Guy is...ALIVE??? NEXT ISSUE: THE ASTONISHING CONCLUSION— DESTROYER OF WORLDS!
DESTROYER DUCK #4
Continuity - Pages 1-11
and 12-20 Written by
STEVE GERBER
1-11 5/9/83
12-20 6/3/83 ECLIPSE COMICS
DESTROYER DUCK #4
Panel Breakdowns
PAGE ONE
SIX PANELS - NO LOGO OR CREDIT STRIP AT TOP - NO INDICIA AT BOTTOM OF PAGE
Each of the six panels has rounded corners to suggest the shape of a TELEVISION SCREEN. All are the same size.
SPECIAL NOTE: Jack, please make the horizontal gutters 3/4-INCH THICK and SOLID BLACK. (The copy will be lettered under the panels, in these black gutters, so the page must have a 3/4INCH BLACK HORIZONTAL GUTTER AT THE BOTTOM. This also means there is no need to leave any "dead space" in the panel composi tion.) Vertical gutter remains the usual width.
(1)
TIGHT CLOSEUP OF VANILLA CUPCAKE Hands clasped under her chin...sweet, sappy, wide-eyed expres sion on her face, as she sings a song about "Friendship with Icing On Top" — no doubt composed by Godcorp's "Musical Con cepts, Ltd." subsidiary.
(2) VERY SLIGHTLY WIDER SHOT OF VANILLA CUPCAKE
Still singing her little heart out. We see that there's a MAN standing to her right and a WOMAN on her left, but we can't see any of their faces clearly at all. (Cupcake is standing on a little platform. She's at eye-level with the adults.) (3) WIDER ANGLE - INCLUDING THE MAN AND WOMAN
Cupcake is finishing her song with a flourish, tossing up her little hands in a gesture that says: "Obviously!" We can see the man and woman now. They are RONALD & NANCY REAGAN, big grins on their faces, as they applaud Cucpake's song.
((MORE))
2.
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE ONE
(CONT)
(4) TWO-SHOT - CUPCAKE AND REAGAN
As she throws her arms around his neck and plants a happy, little girl kiss on Reagan's cheek! Reagan is looking toward the TV camera, pretending to be embarrassed.
(5) ANOTHER ANGLE - MEAD PACKER, REAGAN & CUPCAKE
Packer is standing at the President's left. (I.e., Reagan is between Packer and Cupcake.) Reagan is shaking Packer's hand, wishing him and Cupcake good luck on their goodwill mission to the people of Hoqoom. Packer is all smiles, playing the Proud-to-be-an-American Type.
(6)
LONG SHOT - WHITE HOUSE LAWN - A GIANT ARMY HELICOPTER
is descending to take Cupcake and Packer to Dulles Airport for flight to Hoqoom. Cupcake, now held in Packer's arms, waves goodbye to the President and Nancy.
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
3.
PAGES TWO & THREE
DOUBLE PAGE EXTRAVAGANZA - BLEED ON ALL FOUR SIDES
NOTE: Jack, a small favor...to help me with both balloon placement and shipping. Please tape two sheets of the DC paper together for this spread (and the other one coming up), rather than using a single, large sheet.
INT. CHERRIES JUBILEE'S APARTMENT - EXTREME WIDE ANGLE
To refresh your memory, Jack, here's part of the description of the apartment I gave you last time: A tiny efficiency; no furniture, except:
A drawing board, with a charcoal drawing of Vanilla Cupcake in progress. A work table piled with notebooks A four-drawer file cabinet, overflowing with papers A steel secretarial chair. Art supplies — tablets, charcoal pencils, brushes, paints, pallate, etc. — are strewn about the work area.
Three upended orange crates — Beryl's "bed” — lined up lengthwise, with a pillow at one end. Pictures of Godcorp employees paper the walls: Medea, Woblina Strangelegs, Ned Packer, Sidney Upwind, etc. A picture of Vanilla Cupcake's mother has a dagger stuck between the eyes!
At the moment, the apartment is in total chaos — as DUKE, CHERRIES JUBILEE, and BRAD WHITE do battle with the FOUR COG BURNS from last issue.
NOTE: SEE REFERENCE MATERIAL AT BACK OF SCRIPT FOR MY "COGBURN NUMBERING SYSTEM". Now...here's what everyone is doing. DUKE has flattened on the floor, and an arrow fired from COGBURN-4's crossbow has passed over him to imbed itself in the picture of Vanilla Cupcake on the drawing board. Speedlines indicate the arrow's path.
From his position on the floor, DUKE is firing both his guns, blasting away part of COGBURN-4's shoulder, and hitting COGBURN-3
Destroyer Duck #4
4.
PAGES TWO AND THREE (CONT)
in the knee. Spatters of blood and bits of clothing are flying, as these two COGBURNS go reeling. The knife is dropping from COGBURN-2's mouth, the lead pipe from his hand, and his gun is firing at the ceiling, bringing down chunks of plaster. CHERRIES JUBILEE is holding her "cherry jawbreaker" by its chain, swinging it through the air, right into COGBURN-1's face! COGBURN-1 is careening backward against the work table, tipping it over. Blood is spurting from his mouth and nose! CHERRIES JUBILEE is shouting to the others not to kill the Cogburns!
BRAD is diving behind Cherries Jubilee's orange crate-bed, as COGBURN-2 fires at him with his bayonetted rifle. The rifle-fire is hitting the crates, blasting them into splinters.
TWO IMPORTANT NOTES; 1) Draw all the way to the edge of the page on all four sides, Jack, but keep most of the essential action con tained within the blue-ruled area.
2) Without getting gratuitous, don't be afraid to show a few spatters of blood and flesh flying. This scene should convey that the characters' lives are at stake. It's more than just a joke. (Especially in light of the revelation coming up in the next few pages regarding the Cogburns.)
Destroyer Duck #4
5.
PAGE FOUR (1) ANGLE - PAST COGBURN-2 TO BRAD
Looking over Cogburn-2's shoulder and down the barrel of his rifle, as he draws a bead on Brad — now squatting, arms wrapped around his head, amid the splinters of the orange crates.
(2)
CHERRIES JUBILEE
whirls in Brad’s direction, sees what's about to happen! As she turns she's pulling one of her little cherry bombs off her belt!
(3)
ANOTHER ANGLE - PAST CHERRY BOMB TO CHERRIES JUBILEE Cherries Jubilee has hurled the tiny bomb straight at our "camera". She's shouting her battlecry: "FLAMBEE!!"
(4) LARGER PANEL - ANGLE FAVORING COGBURN-2
The cherry bomb strikes him — and he erupts into flame! (Play this as realistically as possible, Jack. The flames should not be as stylized as, say, the Human Torch's.) Off to the sides, we see Duke, flabbergasted at the effect of the bomb, getting to his feet...and Brad looking up in horror at Cogburn-2.
(5) ANGLE - DOOR OF APARTMENT
Cherries Jubilee leading the charge, Duke and Brad exit the apartment at a run. None of the Cogburns are in any shape to follow. DUKE: I thought we weren't supposed to kill 'em. CHERRIES: Right — unless all you're going to leave behind is ashes.
Destroyer Duck #4
6.
PAGE FOUR (CONT)
Layout
7.
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE FIVE
(1)
FRONT ENTRANCE OF APARTMENT BUILDING Duke, Cherries Jubilee, and Brad come rushing out onto the street. Some more bizarre thoughts from Brad.
(2)
ANGLE
CHERRIES JUBILEE
hails a cab
It’s screeching up to the curb
(3)
INT. BACK SEAT OF CAB We see only the back of the DRIVER'S head as Duke, Cherries Jubilee, and Brad pile into the cab. She is giving instructions for him to drive to JFK airport, a specific private airline hangar. (IMPORTANT NOTE: The Driver is wearing a cap that covers the top of his head completely. He is separated from our guys by one of those clear plexiglas walls between the front and back seats.) (4)
ANOTHER ANGLE - DUKE, BRAD, AND CHERRIES JUBILEE Duke whispers to Cherries Jubilee: he's wondering how they're going to pay for the cab, let alone a plane flight. Cherries Jubilee tells him not to worry. By the time they reach JFK, the cab will reek with her cherry pheromones. Driver will do anything for her. Brad seems to have tuned out altogether; he's chewing on his knuckles.
(5)
TWO-SHOT - DUKE AND CHERRIES JUBILEE Duke asks Cherries Jubilee to explain her warning not to kill the Cogburns. CHERRIES JUBILEE: When Godcorp acquired Spoot Pharmaceuticals, they immediately began searching for appli cations of Spoot's advanced bioengineering technologies. The Cogburns were one of those projects.
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE FIVE (CONT)
(6)
CUT TO: KASBAH SECTION OF HOQOOM - A DARK ALLEYWAY
As Cherries Jubilee continues her explanation in "voice-over" captions, we see the SPINE of the Cogburn who was killed in the desert last issue, clattering toward us down the alley. A DRUNKEN ARAB is sprawled over the tops of three trashcans, asleep or dead, but otherwise, there is no human to be seen.
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
9.
PAGES SIX AND SEVEN (1)
ANGLE - A WINDOWLESS, MUD-WALLED HOVEL
With a curtained arch-shaped entryway. Painted over the arch, small but noticeable, is the hand-clutching-the-world symbol of Godcorp. The spine snakes through the curtains, into the hovel.
(2)
INT. THE HOVEL The dilapidated furnishings consist of a cot, a wooden chair, a small table, and a threadbare rug on the floor. There is an open suitcase on the cot. The spine makes its way to a dark corner of the room. It has started to exude some strange liquid from the vertebrae.
(3)
THE SPINE curls up on the floor in the fetal position. The fluid begins to coalesce around it, forming a semi-transparent, fluid-filled sac — like the amniotic sac that encases a human embryo in the womb!
(4) CLOSEUP - THE TOP OF THE SPINE
Seen through the transparent sac: the beginnings of human head grow out of the top of the spine! The head is as large as that of a grown man, but, like a fetus's, it has no facial features yet — only depressions in the flesh, where the eyes, ears, nose, and mouth will develop. (5)
WIDER ANGLE - THE UPPER HALF OF THE SPINE
Again seen through the semi-transparent sac. A thoracic struc ture and the stubby beginnings of limbs are growing from the spine.
10.
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGES SIX AND SEVEN (CONT)
(5)
WIDER ANGLE - THE UPPER HALF OF THE SPINE Again seen through the semi-transparent sac. A thoracic struc ture and the stubby beginnings of limbs are growing from the spine.
(6) WIDER ANGLE - THE ENTIRE MAN-SIZED "EMBRYO"
Though the "embryo" is still curled in the fetal position, we can discern the outlines of arms and legs, fingers and toes, and a fine growth of hair on the head.
(7) STILL WIDER ANGLE - INCLUDING THE ENTIRETY OF THE SAC As a beefy fist and arm — coated with a shiny, slimy, greasy substance — punch through the membranous skin of the sac! Fluid spews from the sac as it breaks.
(8)
LARGE, DISGUSTING PANEL - COGBURN - FULL FRONTAL NUDE SHOT (Honest.
I haven't lost my mind, Jack.
Read on.)
He is bursting out of the amniotic sac, flexing his massive muscles. Pieces of the sac fly sickeningly through the air, some of them clinging to the walls and draping over the furniture. The amniotic fluid is spattering everything in sight. Cogburn's entire body is coated with the same gooey substance as his fist in the previous panel. In places, it clings to him in large globules.
We see now that Cogburn's body is completely smooth from the neck down. He has no nipples, no navel, no genitals, and no body hair except on his head and arms! (His thick head of hair has almost completely grown back, and he already has the stubble of a beard on his chin.)
In other words, from the neck down, Cogburn looks like Casper the Friendly Ghost — after a bodybuilding course!
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
11.
PAGES SIX AND SEVEN (CONT)
(9) ANGLE - THE COT
The regenerated Cogburn has taken a new T-shirt from the open suitcase on the cot. He is pulling it down over his head, and we can see it is emblazened with the words: DAMN I *M GOOD!
NOTE: Over this sequence, Cherries Jubilee will be telling us about the peculiar physiology of the Cogburns. Each one is an imperfect genetic replica, a clone, loosely based upon a Godcorp employee who died long ago in loyal service to the company. His genes were preserved for possible future exploitation.
They couldn't exactly duplicate the prior employee; they were able to imbue the clones with the same loyalty, but the clones were always stupider and mindlessly self destructive. So, Godcorp's scientists compensated for this in another way. Each Cogburn carries within him the seed of his own replacement. This was accomplished by making them spineless: the Cogburn persona is really nothing more than a temporary host for the encoded genetics in the spine. If the Cogburn dies, the spine simply tears itself loose and hides in a dark place until it grows another spineless body to wear it!
Layout
12
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE EIGHT
(1)
CUT TO:
INT. BACK SEAT OF CAB - J+, DUKE & BRAD
As j/ finishes telling the history of the Cogburns to a gaping Duke. Brad is hardly paying attention. He's staring glassy eyed at something out the side window. (2) ANGLE - PAST BRAD OUT THE SIDE WINDOW
Through the window we see one of the airport's control towers on the other side of a chainlink fence. Brad points to the fence and the tower, comments that this is peculiar way to enter the airport. (3)
EXT. ON A SECTION OF THE FENCE As the cab barrels right through it, onto a runway! (4)
INT. THE CAB - ANGLE PAST DUKE TO DRIVER Duke pounds on the plexiglas barrier with both fists, demanding to know what the Driver thinks he's doing!
(5)
THE DRIVER - DUKE'S POV He turns around and tips his cap — revealing the distinctive blue mohawk haircut of URANUS P. CHICAGO (from D.D. #2, page two). Grinning insanely, he tells Duke he's going to ram the cab into the front tire of a 747...to exact revenge for his humiliation at Duke's hands...and to demonstrate his love for Mariel Hemingway. Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
13.
PAGE NINE
(1)
EXTREME WIDE ANGLE - THE RUNWAY AT FAR LEFT OF PANEL, a JUMBO JETLINER is entering the shot. We see only about a third of the plane — its nose, front landing gear, and the edge of its wing. AT FAR RIGHT OF PANEL, the CAB is entering the scene, barrelling directly toward the huge tire of the jetliner’s landing gear. Both plane and cab are seen in "profile."
(2) INT. CAB - ANGLE PAST URANUS INTO BACK SEAT
Through the plexiglas partition, in the back seat, we see Cherries Jubilee and Duke trying desperately to open cab's rear doors. The doors won't budge. Brad is staring straight ahead, terrified, eight fingers in his mouth up to the knuckles! (His thumbs are gripping his jaws.) Uranus is in f.g., face frozen in a maniacal grin. This is his moment of kamikaze glory. With one hand, he grips the steering wheel. With the other he points to a red button atop the steering column. This, he explains, is the only way the cab's rear doors can be opened now. And he's not about to press it. They're trapped!
(3) EXT. RUNWAY - SAME ANGLE AS PANEL ONE But now we can see more of the plane. The distance between the plane's landing gear and the cab is closing.
(4) INT. CAB - SAME ANGLE AS PANEL TWO
The heels of Cherries Jubilee's boots are smashing thru the plexiglas partition. Duke is shielding his face from the flying fragments. Brad's position and expression remain unchanged from Panel Two. Uranus's eyes (but not his head) are looking toward the back seat. There's the merest hint of panic in his expression.
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
14.
PAGE NINE
(CONT)
(5)
EXT. RUNWAY - SAME ANGLE AS PANEL ONE The cab and the landing gear of the plane are now perhaps twenty yards away from a disastrous collision!
(6) INT CAB - SAME ANGLE AS PANEL TWO
The partition has been shattered. Duke, reaching over the seat, has a choke-hold on Uranus. Uranus has let go of the steering wheel and is trying to break Duke’s grip. Cherries Jubilee is reaching around Uranus, pressing the red button on the steering column!
Layout
15.
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGES TEN & ELEVEN
DOUBLE-PAGE SPREAD WITH INSERT SHOTS - BLEED ON ALL FOUR SIDES OF "BOTH"'PAGET'-"TEE LAYOUT----------------------------------------------------------------------(1)
INSERT PANEL - LANDING GEAR AND PLANE'S FRONT TIRE At the instant of impact. The tire of the plane is rolling onto the hood of the cab, crushing it. Simultaneously, the plane's tire blows out. Steam is blasting from the cab's crushed engine. One rear door of the cab is flung open, and the tiny figures of Duke, Cherries Jubilee, and Brad are spil ling out.
(2)
INSERT PANEL - INT. CAB - ANGLE ON URANUS OF HIM)
(OR WHAT'S LEFT
As the tire of the airplane rolls over him! The left half of this panel consists of the tire tread. Uranus is spreadeagle under the tire. All we can see are one of his arms reaching up, one of his legs kicking out, and a big red blotch squirting out from under the tire. (SEE DIAGRAM.) DIAGRAM OF PANEL TWO
EXTREME WIDE ANGLE - LARGE PANEL
The jetliner's wheel is now about midway down the length of the cab. The cab is EXPLODING into a million pieces and crac king the stem of the plane's landing gear. As a result, the jetliner is tipping over — one wing cracking in half as it smacks the ground. The engines on that wing are also EXPLODING! Smoke is billowing! Flames are shooting into the sky! Metal fragments fly in every direction! The smoke is so thick, we cannot see where Duke, Cherries Jubilee, and Brad are in the scene!
((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
16.
PAGES TEN AND ELEVEN
(CONT)
(4) INSERT PANEL - ANGLE DUKE, CHERRIES JUBILEE, & BRAD All lying flat on the ground. Duke has his arms over the back of his head, his beak flat on the asphalt. He's looking straight toward us. Cherries Jubilee, with her helmet, doesn't need to protect herself that way: a shard of flying metal is glancing off her helmet. Brad still has eight fingers in his mouth, but his chin is touching the asphalt. His elbows are spread out at his sides like chicken wings. The three are bruised, battered, dishevelled, covered with soot from head to toe — but they're alive.
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Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE TWELVE
(1) ANGLE - PAST DUKE, CHERRIES & BRAD TO THE FLAMING JETLINER
Trio is seen from back, in f.g., watching as fire trucks & ambulances race through clouds of smoke to the airliner. CHERRIES: They haven’t spotted us yet. Let's get out of here. DUKE: Ok, guess the xxx will get the fire under control. (2)
ANGLE - A HANGAR - LONG SHOT
It's slightly seedy-looking. Painted on the hangar's roof are the words: AIR PORONGUS - PABLO PARONGUS, PROPRIETOR & PILOT. The tiny figures of Duke and Cherries are running toward the hangar. Duke is dragging Brad along by the collar of his t-shirt; he's in a state of shock. (3)
INT. HANGAR - ANGLE PAST PABLO PARONGUS TO ENTRANCE
In f.g. of shot, sprawled in slumber on the top of his desk, is PABLO PARONGUS. He's a midget, a little shorter than Duke, with a full head of wildly unkempt white hair. He's dressed in a pilot's cap, W.W. II bomber jacket, and long underwear. Arrayed on the desk we see an ashtray overflowing with butts and an empty bottle of Scotch. A drinking glass is slowly tipping out of Pablo's hand. In b.g. of shot, Duke, still dragging Brad, and Cherries are entering through a doorway into the hangar. (An ordinary sized door, Jack — not the one the plane would use.) Cherries is calling out to Pablo, who doesn't react at all.
(4) ANGLE - CHERRIES & PABLO
Cherries is grabbing Pablo by his bomber jacket and lifting him over her head, shaking him, screaming at him to wake up. How could he have forgotten their arrangement? Pablo's eyes are barely flickering open. ((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
18
PAGE TWELVE (CONT)
(5)
TIGHT ON PABLO & CHERRIES His eyes look like they're about to dribble out of their soc kets. His lips are puckered, and he is planting a kiss on the metallic nose of Cherries's helmet. Pablo is telling her he's afraid of flying — before he can take to the air he has to be in this condition!
(6) ANGLE - DUKE & BRAD
Duke is holding the empty booze bottle and looking with grim apprehension at Cherries and Pablo (off-panel). Why, he wonders, couldn't she have used her pheromones on the president of TWA...? In b.g., Brad, still in stark terror, is sitting on the floor with one leg wrapped around his neck; he is biting the ankle of that leg.
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
19.
PAGE THIRTEEN
(1) CUT TO: EXT. SWISS ALPS - A CHALET - ESTABLISHING SHOT - DAY
Something right out of Heidi — except that there's a heicopter pad next to the chalet with two helicopters sitting on it. The pad is emblazoned with the Godcorp hand-crushing-the-world insignia. There's apparently no other access to the place. Their are voices coming from the chalet — those of SIDNEY UPWIND, Godcorp's chairman of the board (the Walter Cronkite type), and GENERAL YAOUSAH ABUUK.
(2) INT. CHALET -
A MEETING ROOM - WIDE SHOT
It looks like the command center of a James Bond villain — map of the world with blinking lights, a long, low-slung futur istically designed conference table with contoured chairs, banks of computers, etc. Seated at one end of the conference table is Sidney Upwind. Behind him stands Woblina Strangelegs. Seated at the opposite end is Gen. Abuuk. Behind him stand TWO HOQOOM LIBERATION FRONT TROOPERS and a FEMALE BELLY DANCER IN NATIVE COSTUME.. UPWIND: ABUUK:
I take it our offer interests you, General... Affirmative — but must be sure Godcorp can be trusted to fulfill its end of bargain.
(3) ANGLE - UPWIND & STRANGELEGS
He's speaking with almost unearthly calm, considering what he's saying to the off-panel Abuuk. Woblina tries to conceal her astonishment. Even she didn't realize they had this is mind!
UPWIND:
UPWIND:
The FISSIONABLE MATERIALS you require are stored in a vault beneath this chalet Energy Concepts is preparing a KIT with the necessary implements for assembling the...device you wish to build. But we also need assurances...
20
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE THIRTEEN (CONT)
(4)
ON GENERAL ABUUK AND THE BELLY DANCER He snaps his fingers. She enticingly lifts a veil from her midriff. Tattooed on her belly are several paragraphs in indecipherable Arabic writing. ABUUK: ABUUK:
ABUUK:
SEREENA— the veil! Tattooed indelibly on the belly of this young woman is a 99-YEAR LEASE, giving ENERGY CONCEPTS, LTD. exclusive rights to exploit and develop such oil resources as may be discovered in the Hoqoom desert. Lease is signed by the chief of the PROVISIONAL GOVERNMENT OF THE PEOPLE'S REPUBLIC OF HOQOOM — me.
(5) ANOTHER ANGLE - UPWIND, ABUUK & BELLY DANCER
Upwind is stepping up to them and patting her tattoo lascivi ously. Big grin on his face and Abuuk's. UPWIND:
ABUUK:
I assume the young lady will lie across the photoreceptors of our COPYING machine...! She will lie anywhere you ask, Upwind. She is yours— a gift to seal our bargain!
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
21.
PAGE FOURTEEN
(1)
EXT. AN AIRPLANE IN FLIGHT - NIGHT
Stormy, cloudy sky. Lightning bolts crackle around an old Army surplus crate, circa World War II. Painted on the fuselage are the words: AIR PARONGUS. The plane’s path through the sky (indicated by speedlines) is a series of dips, dives, and swoops back up. (2) INT. COCKPIT - ON PABLO AND CHERRIES
TILT ANGLE OF PANEL TO EMPHASIZE PLANE'S ERRATIC FLIGHT PATH. Pablo's in the pilot's chair; Cherries's in the co-pilot's seat. He’s still out-of-his-mind drunk, his head lolling over to one side, his eyes crossed. She's smacking him upside the head with the back of her hand, yelling at him!
CHERRIES: PABLO:
WAKE UP!! WHY? We're still in the air, aren't we?!
(3) ANGLE - ACROSS CHERRIES TO HATCH OF COCKPIT
TILT ANGLE OF SHOT IN OPPOSITE DIRECTION FROM PANEL TWO. Duke is standing in the hatch, gripping the sides with both hands to avoid being flung backward into the plane. He's looking very grim. DUKE: CHERRIES: DUKE:
Can't believe I VOLUNTEERED for this mission. Not to worry, Pablo is a crack pilot, despite his eccentricities. Has higher tolerance for eccentricities on the ground than at 40,000 feet...!
(4)
INT. PASSENGER COMPARTMENT OF PLANE - ANGLE FAVORING BRAD TILT ANGLE OF SHOT IN OPPOSITE DIRECTION OF PANEL THREE. Brad's seated in a passenger chair, thoroughly contorted — both legs now wrapped around his head and his fingers stuck deep in his mouth again. His eyes are still bugging in terror. Duke, gripping the tops of the passenger chairs, is moving
22.
Destroyer Duck #4 PAGE FOURTEEN (CONT)
(4, cont)
down the aisle of the plane. BRAD: DUKE:
He looks at Brad, wide-eyed.
says something bizarre... Thought only WOBLINA could do that...!
(5) ANGLE - A PASSENGER CHAIR
Duke is settling into the chair, prepared for a long, harrowing flight. He is picking up a magazine from the passenger chair next to him: a copy of LIFE with a big black X drawn through the logo and the words PARONGUS AMBASSADOR scrawled across the cover. This completely unnerves him.
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
23
PAGE FIFTEEN
(1)
EXT. ANGLE PAST ROLLS ROYCE TO FACADE OF BOWERY HILLS HOTEL - NIGHT The flophouse where Duke had been residing. A Rolls Royce with an unusual hood ornament — a silver statuette of BLIND JUSTICE holding her scales — is parked at the curb in front of the place. It belongs to DESTROYER LAWYER HOLMES, and it's known and feared as the LAWMOBILE.
HOLMES:
(FROM HOTEL) THINK, man! last see Duke...?
When did you
(2) INT. HOTEL - AT THE SEEDY REGISTRATION DESK
Destroyer Lawyer, in full regalia, is questioning QUENTIN, the besotted desk clerk. Quentin is bent over at the waist, the upper half of his body virtually pouring over the counter. Holmes is leaning down to talk to him. HOLMES:
QUENTIN:
It's urgent! Haven't heard from him in days! Could be in big trouble! Thought he checked out or something...gave his bed to BAD BORIS, the neighborhood mad Russian...ya don't wanna mess with Boris...!
(3)
EXT. HOTEL ENTRANCE - ANGLE ON HOLMES As he storms back onto the street, frustrated. He heard about the fight between Duke and Medea. Maybe he can get some answers from her.
(4) ANGLE - LAWMOBILE
As it tears away from the curb with Holmes at the wheel. In b.g., we see someone hiding behind a lamppost, watching the car depart. We cannot discern who the figure might be, however.
Destroyer Duck #4
24.
PAGE FIFTEEN (CONT)
(5) ANGLE - THE FIGURE AT THE LAMPPOST
is illuminated by the light of a massive off-panel EXPLOSION! Flaming shards of Rolls Royce are hurtling past him through the panel! It's YET ANOTHER COGBURN — this one in a trenchcoat and fedora! SFX:
KRAKOOOM!!
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
25.
PAGE SIXTEEN
(1) EXT. HOQOOM DESERT - WIDE SHOT - DAY
Dawn on the desert, just outside the city. This is roughly the same place where General Abuuk departed Hoqoom last issue. Now he is returning from Switzerland. He is walking from a Lear jet (which bears the Godcorp hand-crushing-the-world symbol on its fuselage) to where two of his TROOPERS are wait ing, in a jeep. (FIRST TROOPER is driving. SECOND TROOPER is opening door of jeep for Abuuk.) In b.g. is the skyline of Hoqoom, modern buildings interspersed with ancient domes and minarets.
BLURB: SECOND TROOPER: ABUUK:
TRANSITIONAL CAPTION - IT'S BEEN FOUR OR FIVE HOURS SINCE THE SEQUENCE IN SWITZERLAND. Welcome home, General. Vanilla Cupcake due to arrive at Hoqoom International Airport in two hours. Good. Any reaction from Pahkmani?
(2) ANGLE ON THE JEEP Abuuk now seated beside the Driver. (The Second Trooper rides in the rear seat.) They're driving toward the city. In b.g., the Lear jet is taking off again. FIRST TROOPER:
FIRST TROOPER:
ABUUK:
Pahkmani has made speech on decadence of Vanilla Cupcake dolls and toys, etc. Intends to search plane, see that none of the banned merchandise enters Hoqoom. Speech also included threat on the child's life — but nothing more serious than that. He's terrified, then!
(3)
HOQOOM BACK ALLEY - ABUUK'S SECRET GARAGE We saw this in DUCK #2 (page 17), Jack. It's a mud wall that rises up automatically like a garage door, allowing the jeep to enter. Next to the door, in pseudo-Arabic grafitti on
Destroyer Duck #4
26.
PAGE SIXTEEN (CONT) (3, cont) the wall, is the slogan: "Grab it all, own it all, drain it all." The jeep is driving into the garage.
BLURB: ABUUK: ABUUK:
TRANSITION TO GET US INTO CITY & ESTABLISH SECRET GARAGE. That means Pahkmani will make MISTAKES — and perhaps we should LET him. Suppose we ALLOWED him to assassinate Vanilla Cupcake? Would our cause be harmed —or strengthened?
(4)
INT. GARAGE - ANGLE PAST COGBURN TO THE JEEP This is the Cogburn in the "Damn I'm Good" t-shirt. He's lolling on a stack of boxes, as the jeep pulls to a halt in the garage. He waves an offhanded hello to Abuuk and the Troopers. Abuuk is gaping. COGBURN:
ABUUK:
So how'd your meeting go with Mr. Upwind, General...? You?! ALIVE—?!?
(5) ANGLE - COGBURN, TROOPERS & ABUUK
As Cogburn swaggers up to the jeep, a big grin on his face. The Troopers have their rifles pointed at him, but Abuuk, looking dismally unhappy, gesturing for them to lower their weapons.
COGBURN: ABUUK:
COGBURN:
Wouldn't be much good to the company DEAD, would I, General? To answer your question, Mr. Cogburn...meeting went splendidly. By tomorrow evening, the Hoqoom Liberation Front will have an ATOM BOMB in its arsenal. Congrats! Now you better clean yourself up, General.
Layout
27
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE SEVENTEEN
(1)
TIGHT TWO-SHOT - ABUUK AND COGBURN Cogburn is stroking Abuuk's stubbly face with his knuckles (hand clenched in a fist). Abuuk is simmering with anger.
COGBURN:
ABUUK:
Vanilla Cupcake doesn't like to kiss world leaders who don't shave. (Or somesuch insult.) (Nasty retort.)
(2)
EXT. HOQOOM INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT - LARGE PANEL - DAY - BLEED ON TOP AND SIDES OF PANEL (SEE LAYOUT) Vanilla Cupcake, Mead Packer, and Jewel Mudge (Cupcake's mother) are coming down a flight of stairs that has been rolled up to the hatch of a jetliner. Cupcake is first down the stairs, blowing kisses. Packer is next, followed by Jewel, both beaming with pride.
General Abuuk (now clean-shaven and wearing a neatly-pressed uniform) is waiting at the bottom of the stairs, kneeling, arms extended in greeting, smiling. To one side of Abuuk stands the t-shirted Cogburn. Around him is gathered a crowd of REPORTERS, cameras trained on Cupcake. A group of HOQOOMITE CHILDREN, poorly-dressed, barefoot, and waving bouquets of desert flowers — is also on hand, cheering Vanilla Cupcake.
(3) TIGHT ON ABUUK AND CUPCAKE
As she steps into his arms and prepares to give him a big kiss. But before she can... (4)
SAME SHOT AS PANEL THREE But now Abuuk and Cupcake are jerking their heads around, looking off-panel in the same direction. They hear the sound of gunfire! Abuuk is startled! Cupcake, angry!
ABUUK: CUPCAKE: SFX:
What's that...?! I knew it...I KNEW BLAM!! BLAM!!
((MORE))
it...!!
Destroyer Duck #4
28.
PAGE SEVENTEEN (CONT)
Layout
Destroyer Duck #4
29
PAGES EIGHTEEN AND NINETEEN
(1) THE RUNWAY STRIP - EXTREME WIDE ANGLE - ACROSS TOP HALF OF BOTH PAGES - BLEED ON TOP AND SIDES
At left side of panel is the airplane, with Cupcake, Abuuk, Packer, Jewel, Cogburn, the Reporters and the Children. Coining from the right side of the panel are a formation of jeeps and trucks — filled with the hooded soldiers of PAHKMANI'S GHOST BRIGADES!
The Ghost Brigaders are firing rifles, machine guns, pistols, etc. Bullets are hitting the concrete runway at the feet of the crowd, and whizzing over their heads, ricocheting off the airplane. Reporters and Children are fleeing in a panic. Packer is leaping over the bannister of the stairs from the plane, looking for a place to hide. Jewel is running back into the airplane. Cupcake is screaming in terror. Abuuk is pulling a pistol from his holster, and Cogburn is pulling one out from behind his back! (2) NARROW PANEL - ON ABUUK
He falls backward as a bullet creases his skull!
(3) NARROW PANEL - CLOSE ON COGBURN
He takes one bullet through the throat and another right between the eyes. Blood gushes from his neck, and fragments of the back of his skull fly in all directions out of panel! (4)
ANGLE - PAST CUPCAKE TO PAHKMANI JEEP Tears streaming down her face, screaming in terror, Cupcake has broken into a run straight toward our "camera." The jeep is coming up fast right behind her! It looks like Pahkmani's soldiers intend to run her down! ((MORE))
Destroyer Duck #4
30.
PAGES EIGHTEEN AND NINETEEN (CONT) (5) ANOTHER ANGLE - ON CUPCAKE AND JEEP
The jeep has swerved to one side of her, and one of the Ghost Brigaders is leaning out of the jeep and scooping up Cupcake in his arm! She is screeching bloody murder!
(6) NARROW PANEL - ON PACKER
looking out from his hiding place under the rolling stairway, at the off-panel jeep as it roars away. He's aghast! His meal ticket has just been kidnapped! (7)
NARROW PANEL - ON JEWEL
peering out the hatch of the airplane toward the off-panel jeep. Her expression says "guilt", not anguish: "What will people think? I've let my daughter be abducted..."
Layout
31.
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE TWENTY (1) EXT. TUNIS AIRPORT - ANGLE ON THE AIR PARONGUS PLANE - DAY
This is several hours after Cupcake's abduction. Pablo's crate is taking off after its last refueling stop before Hoqoom.
(2) INT. PASSENGER COMPARTMENT OF PLANE - WIDE SHOT
In a seat toward the front of the plane, Brad, now thoroughly exhausted, lies draped over the back of one of the passenger seats. (I.e., his feet are on the seat; his upper body is bent backward from the waist over the top of the chair, so that he's half-dangling upside down.) Duke is seated further back in another passenger chair, stroking his beak, thinking. Cherries is in the aisle, stepping up him, taking off her helmet.
CHERRIES:
DUKE:
DUKE:
What's on your mind, Duke? You're not sorry you signed up, are you? You still want to help rescue my sister, don't you...? Yeah, yeah. It's just...something's been gnawing at me since you told me about the Cogburns an' that advanced genetic engineering stuff... ...and especially the part about how they could screw around with the Cogs' memories.
(3) CLOSE ON DUKE
Eyes narrowed. this question.
DUKE:
DUKE: DUKE:
Brow furrowed.
He's afraid to even think
If those guys could duplicate one of you PINK PRIMATES, it's not much more difficult to duplicate a DUCK, is it? Especially if it was a LITTLE duck? An' there might be no way the duplicate would KNOW it was a duplicate, right?
32
Destroyer Duck #4
PAGE TWENTY (CONT)
(4)
ON CHERRIES AND DUKE She’s now sitting on the arm of his chair, looking extremely puzzled. Not sure what he’s getting at. Duke himself looks agitated, tense.
(5) CHERRIES: DUKE:
DUKE:
What are you getting at...? Something that Godcorp tried to dissect bled to death on my living room floor awhile ago. I thought that something was my pal...the LITTLE GUY. Now, though, all my deductive instincts are startin' to get this funny ITCH...
(6) EXTREME CLOSEUP ON DUKE
Looking up at Cherries with a mixture of hope and dread... DUKE:
What if the Little Guy is...ALIVE???
LEAVE HALF-INCH STRIP ACROSS BOTTOM OF PAGE FOR NEXT-ISSUE BLURB.
Layout
DESTROYER DOCK #5
Script Pages One through Five
By STEVE GERBER
August 22, 1983
ECLIPSE ENTERPRISES
DESTROYER DUCK #5
PAGE ONE
INT. AIR PARONGUS PLANE - PASSENGER COMPARTMENT - EXTREME TILT ANGLE - BLEED ON ALL FOUR SIDES The plane is swooping and diving crazily. In f.g., and nearest to cockpit is BRAD, in a passenger seat, twisted into another impossible contortion.
CHERRIES JUBILEE is standing in the aisle of the plane, obviShe is holding ously having difficulty keeping her balance. her red helmet.
DUKE is sitting, shoulders hunched, hands clasped, deep in thought. We are picking up the story exactly where we left off last issue.
SHATTERER OF WORLDS!
TITLE:
(ACROSS TOP OF PAGE)
1 BLURB:
Godcorp has dispatched charming, vulnerable VANILLA CUPCAKE1^ on a goodwill mission to HOQOOM— a mideast nation on the verge of REVOLUTION.
2 BLURB:
Fearful for the child's life, her sister, CHERRIES JUBILEE, has vowed to RESCUE her— with the aid of BRAD WHITE, PABLO PARONGUS... and DUKE "DESTROYER" DUCK.
3 BLURB
Now, en route, the marauding mallard realizes there may be even MORE at stake...
4 DUKE:
What if Godcorp DIDN'T murder THE LITTLE GUY? WHAT IF HE'S STILL ALIVE?!?
5 DUKE:
It could've been a GENETIC REPLICATION— like a COGBURN— that bled to death on my floor!
6 CHERRIES:
It doesn't make SENSE, Duke.
7 BRAD:
(LOWER CASE LETTERS)
Why...?
=gnnnfph=
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
2
PAGE TWO
(1)
CLOSER ON DUKE & CHERRIES - EXTREME TILT ANGLE The opposite tilt to that of page one. She rests her arm on the back of Duke's seat, listening, her expression skeptical. Duke is still in the same pose, staring straight ahead, very intense.
1 DUKE: 2 DUKE: 3 CHERRIES:
Maybe the Little Guy TOLD 'em about me— so they cut up a CLONE— and SENT it back—! Maybe they figured I'd be USEFUL. And they LURED you here, huh? What FOR?
(2) ANGLE - FAVORING CHERRIES - EXTREME TILT ANGLE
She topples back to sit on the arm of the passenger seat across the aisle from Duke. Her expression is extremely sarcastic.
4 CHERRIES:
5 CHERRIES: 6 DUKE:
To snuff NED PACKER, the president of their company? To get them in dutch with the JUSTICE DEPARTMENT? I can believe almost ANYTHING about Godcorp, Duke, but— —but you STILL haven't learned to think like THEY do!
(3)
CLOSE - DUKE - EXTREME TILT ANGLE Jabs a finger in the air at the off-panel Cherries.
7 DUKE:
8 DUKE: 9 DUKE:
Listen, sister, I usedta be a COP. And I'm seein' these CORPORATE TYPES aren't so damn DIFFERENT from your typical STREET PUNK. They're only out for THEMSELVES— they can't see beyond the ends of their BEAKS— —and they've always got an ANGLE!
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
3
PAGE TWO (CONT)
(4)
WIDE ANGLE - THE PASENGER SECTION OF THE PLANE - EXTREME TILT ANGLE On an upward tilt. Duke has left his seat and is moving "up hill" toward the cockpit. Cherries, looking a little startled now, is still sitting on the arm of the chair. Brad is hanging by his knees from a luggage rack over the seats with his arms twisted around behind him.
10 DUKE:
11 DUKE:
12 CHERRIES: 13 DUKE:
Suppose Packer was after the chairmanship— and SIDNEY UPWIND wanted him outta the WAY? Or say there was a TAKEOVER BID they were tryin' to squelch? A convenient GOVERNMENT PROBE would send investors RUNNING. But, Duke, the RISKS—! MINIMAL. A few middle-level heads roll. And even if a guy like Upwind gets CANNED—
(5)
ANGLE - HATCH OF THE COCKPIT
Duke is being thrown into scene (speedlines indicating his path) by the plane's sudden tilt downward. He's slamming into the bulkhead next to the hatch. He looks back at the off-panel Cherries. 15 DUKE: SFX: 16 DUKE:
—you can bet he's got a GOLDEN PARACHUTE written into his contract. (DUKE HITTING BULKHEAD) DHUNNT (BURST; JAGGED LETTERS) =QUA-AA-AGH=
Layout
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
4.
PAGE THREE
(1)
EXT. THE PLANE AND THE GROUND - TALL, NARROW PANEL - NO BORDER AROUND PANEL (SEE LAYOUT) The plane is plunging straight downward, toward an oasis (three palm trees and a waterhole) and TWO NOMAD TYPES who are watering their camels there.
1 DUKE:
(FROM PLANE)
Speakin' of PARACHUTES...!
(2) INT. COCKPIT - ANGLE PAST PABLO TO HATCH
PABLO PARONGUS, in f.g., is sprawled over the stick. He holds a stainless steel flask in one drooping hand. Duke is prac tically falling into the cockpit through the hatch, horrified.
4 DUKE: 5 PABLO: 6 DUKE:
(BURST) PABLO!! =burrrp= Don' WHORRY, dock...I hab eb’rytheen honder =brrrepp= control...! Yeah— everything but the PLANE and your DRINKING!
(3)
ANOTHER ANGLE ON DUKE AND PABLO Duke shoves Pablo rudely back in the pilot’s chair and pulls up hard on the stick.
7 PABLO: 8 PABLO: 9 DUKE:
I am FOOLLY ALORT! I hoord eb'ry whord jou SAID back there! I SEEMPATHIZE wit' jou, dock! How SO? Hah!
(4) THE OASIS - WIDE PANEL
The plane's tail grazes the palm trees, as it pulls up out of the nosedive. The nomads and their camels are fleeing the oasis in blind terror!
10 PABLO:
11 PABLO:
L
(FROM PLANE) I got a DEAD GUY who was like a BROTTER to ME, too! Hees name was PEDRO PARONGUS. He was my BROTTER.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
5.
PAGE THREE (CONT)
(4, cont)
12 PABLO: SFX:
They blew hees BRAINS out. (PLANE GRAZING TREES) FRRRRRONND
(5)
POV THRU WINDSHIELD OF COCKPIT - ON DUKE AND PABLO
Duke strapping himself into co-pilot's chair. Pablo sits back, raising the flask to his lips, looking pensive. 1 DUKE: 2 PABLO:
WHO—? The GUERILLAS, the ARMY— who KNOSS? My country ees FULL o' guys who only got the people's WELFARE at heart
Layout
6.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
PAGE FOUR
(1) EXT. HOQOOM AIRPORT - WIDE SHOT - 2/3-PAGE PANEL - BLEED OFF TOP, RIGHT & LEFT SIDES
The aftermath of Pahkmani's attack last issue. Tarmac is littered with bodies: various uniformed members of HOQOOM LIBERATION FRONT... REPORTERS, etc. Smoke and little fires rising from smouldering grenades, charred clothing, etc.
In FOREGROUND: COGBURN in the "DAMN I'M GOOD" t-shirt lies sprawled, blood oozing from head and throat. Near him, GENERAL ABUUK (clean-shaven for this occasion, remember) is on his hands and knees, yelling, shaking his fist. Blood trickles from a small wound on his forehead. In MIDDLEGROUND: MEAD PACKER is coming out of hiding from behind rolling staircase near plane. He looks aghast at the carnage. At top of staircase, Vanilla Cupcake's mother, JEWEL MUDGE, is peering in terror out of the plane. In BACKGROUND: Ambulances are racing toward the scene, sirens wailing, lights flashing.
1 BLURB:
2 BLURB:
3 BLURB:
4 ABUUK:
5 ABUUK:
(ACROSS TOP OF PAGE) The same could be said of HOQOOM. There, moments ago, the TM arrival of VANILLA CUPCAKE was transformed into a BLOODBATH— and Cupcake herself taken HOSTAGE— by the nation's fanatical leader, PAHKMANI THE DEVOURER. JEWEL MUDGE, Cupcake's MOTHER, can already see the headlines in the TABLOIDS, comparing her to JOAN CRAWFORD and TERRI SHIELDS. She shudders. MEAD PACKER, Godcorp's merchandising wizard, gapes at the carnage, appalled. Even if the CHILD survives, the FANTASY that sold her products MAY NOT. (BURST) ABOMINABLE TYRANT!! OOZING SORE ON A CAMEL'S LEFT REAR FLANK!!! Hear me, Pahkmani!! I— YAOUSAH ABUUK of the HOQOOM LIBERATION FRONT— swear by my ancestors' beards to ERADICATE you! !
(MORE)
7
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
PAGE FOUR (CONT)
(2) ANGLE ON ABUUK
PRIVATE ASHMET is offering him a hand up now, helping him to his feet. Both wear thin, mischievous, conspiratorial smiles. 6 ASHMET:
7 ABUUK:
8 ABUUK:
Pahkmani has played into your HANDS, revered General. If he murders the child, he will be universally REVILED. Correct, Ashmet— and no one will blame us for employing the ULTIMATE THREAT to END his thrice-cursed rule! But let us say NO MORE...
(3) ANGLE - PAST THE FALLEN COGBURN TO ABUUK AND ASHMET
Their backs to "camera", they've already walked a few yards toward Packer and Jewel. Unseen by them, Cogburn's spine is beginning to poke upward at the back of his t-shirt, creating a little "tent" effect, as it prepares to rip itself free. (It has not yet ripped through the shirt.) 9 ABUUK:
10 ABUUK:
...not in MR. COGBURN'S presence. He has returned from the grave TWICE ALREADY. His CORPSE could be EAVESDROPPING, even now.
Layout
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
8.
PAGE FIVE
(1)
ON PACKER AND JEWEL Now together at the foot of the rolling stairway. Abuuk is Packer looks grim. Jewel entering panel, approaching them. is on the verge of tears.
1 ABUUK:
2 ABUUK: 3 PACKER:
I am aware how VALUABLE your Cupcake is to Godcorp, Mr. Packer— and, of course, to you, Mrs. Mudge. I shall do all in my POWER to effect her return, alive and well. Thank you, General. Is there a PHONE nearby? I should notify corporate headquarters
(2)
ANOTHER ANGLE - ABUUK, PACKER, AND JEWEL Abuuk is starting to lead them toward the airport building when something off-panel catches Jewel's eye. She is pointing Packer and Abuuk look in the direction at it — and screaming! she's pointing, Abuuk is gaping. Packer's expression doesn't change.
4 ABUUK: 5 JEWEL:
6 PACKER:
Of course. Right this— (BURST; JAGGED LETTERS; OPEN FOR COLOR) =EEEEEEEK= Oh...the COGBURN.
(3) THEIR POV - COGBURN
whose spine has now ripped through the material of the t-shirt, and is whipping and writhing like a snake, tearing free of the corpse.
7 BLURB: 8 BLURB:
(ABUUK SPEAKING) "Packer! What unholy thing is HAPPENING to him—?!" (PACKER SPEAKING) "The spine is DISENGAGING from the corpse...
(4)
ON THE SPINAL COLUMN
slithering away across the tarmac
Destroyer Duck #5 - Script
9.
PAGE FIVE (CONT)
r (4, cont)
9 BLURB:
10 BLURB:
"...to find a dark place where it can GROW ANOTHER BODY. "I assumed you'd been BRIEFED on the Cogburns, General."
(5)
ON ABUUK, PACKER, AND JEWEL Jewel is horrified, shivering. Packer pays no attention to her. He blandly addresses Abuuk, who is staring agog at the off-panel Cogburn.
10 PACKER: 11 PACKER: 12 ABUUK:
13 JEWEL:
They're self-replicating QUASI-HUMANS— —genetically-engineered to display absolute, unquestioning LOYALTY to the company. (SMALL, LOWER-CASE LETTERS) flaming stool of satan...! It's HIDEOUS!
(6) CLOSEUP ON PACKER Getting inspired, determined.
14 PACKER:
15 PACKER:
No...it's CORPORATE CREATIVITY. The same creativity that turned your daughter's GLANDULAR SECRETIONS into a billiondollar MARKETING CONCEPT. When things look worst, Jewel, have FAITH in Godcorp. This company's capable of ANYTHING.
Layout
DESTROYER DUCK I5
Continuity Pages Six thru Twenty
By STEVE GERBER
& BUZZ DIXON
September 9, 1983
ECLIPSE ENTERPRISES
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
10
PAGE SIX
(1) EXT. HIGH ANGLE - GODCORP CHALET IN SWITZERLAND
A small private jet plane (Learjet type) chateau's landing strip. Voices WOBLINA:
SIDNEY UPWIND:
is landing on the
(FROM CHATEAU) Mr. Upwind! There's been a massacre at the Hoqoom airport! Pahkmani has kidnapped Vanilla Cupcake! (FROM CHATEAU) Is that SO...?
(2) CUT TO: INT. LABORATORY BENEATH THE CHALET
In f.g., TWO LAB-COATED SCIENTISTS are assembling the A-bomb that Godcorp has promised to Abuuk. (It's all contained in a metal box with a suitcase-type handle — about the size of a portable typewriter.) In b.g., Woblina and Upwind are watching the procedure.
WOBLINA: WOBLINA: UPWIND:
Given the unstable situation there, is it WISE to provide General Abuuk with an A-BOMB? Isn't he liable to USE it? Don't be NAIVE, Woblina.
(3)
ANGLE - UPWIND & SCIENTISTS One of the scientists hands Upwind the finished bomb...as casually as if it were a portable typewriter. Upwind takes it, nodding his approval. In b.g., Woblina watches, nervously. UPWIND: UPWIND:
Now that we've secured exclusive rights to Hoqoom's OIL RESOURCES— —it could be in Godcorp's BEST INTERESTS for the country to experience a nuclear disaster.
(4) CUT TO; EXT. CHALET - ANGLE ON THE PRIVATE JET
It's marked with the Godcorp hand-crushing-the-world symbol. Woblina and Upwind are walking toward its open hatch. Upwind is carrying the bomb.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
11.
PAGE SIX (CONT)
(4, cont)
UPWIND:
UPWIND: WOBLINA:
If Abuuk explodes the bomb in the capital city, every inhabitant of Hoqoom who'd know an oil lease from asswipe will be VAPORIZED. And there'll be no legal government to go back on the deal. What about Mead Packer? And his billion-dollar BRAT?
(5)
INT. PRIVATE JET It’s outfitted like an executive suite — contoured sofas around a block of marble that serves as a table. Upwind sets the bomb on the table as he takes a seat. Woblina is still standing, mouth agape, not quite believing what she's hearing. UPWIND: UPWIND:
They would die — virtually ENSURING that no one would ever suspect Godcorp's role in the incident. And don't play the bleeding heart, Woblina. Sentiment doesn't become you.
(6)
ANGLE - PAST WOBLINA TO UPWIND
A LACKEY in a butler outfit is serving him a martini on a silver platter,. Upwind is "shooing" Woblina to the front of the plane. Woblina is in f.g., her face a blank mask of horror. UPWIND:
WOBLINA:
Contact our Cogburns in New York, will you? See if they've wrapped up the HOLMES matter — and that business with Cupcake's SISTER? (THOT) He's gone mad. He's willing to sacrifice an entire EXPORT MARKET for short-term gains...!
LAYOUT
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
12
PAGE SEVEN
(1)
CUT TO: THE BOWERY - ANGLE PAST COGBURN TO THE FLAMING WRECKAGE OF DESTROYER LAWYER'S LAWMOBILE A fire truck has arrived on the scene. Firemen have turned their hoses on the blazing wreckage. COGBURN (this one's wearing a trenchcoat and fedora) is watching from the sidewalk. His hands are stuffed in the pockets of his coat. He looks upset.
(GIST OF THOT BALLOON:) Funny...no driver's seat...an' no BODY! Even a lawyer don't cover his tracks that well...!
COGBURN:
(2) LOW ANGLE - PAST COGBURN TO PARAPET OF BUILDING
Destroyer Lawyer Holmes, cape streaming in the wind, is dropping into panel, landing on Cogburn! HOLMES:
(GIST)
SFX:
CHOATE!
Hold it right there, my friend! You've been caught FLAGRANTE DELICTO!
(3)
ANGLE - HOLMES & COGBURN Holmes punches Cogburn, sends him reeling out of panel! HOLMES:
(GIST)
SFX:
PLAT!
Lawmobile was equipped with EJECTION SEAT! (JOKE ABOUT RESTRAINING ORDERS?)
(4) COGBURN
mad as hell, comes charging back at Holmes like a bearded rhino!
(5) HOLMES AND COGBURN
With a backhanded swipe of his fist, Holmes sends Cogburn sprawling backward to the sidewalk.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE SEVEN (CONT)
(5, cont) HOLMES: SFX:
I call this punch my CROSS-CLAIM! FIAT!
(6) LOW ANGLE - PAST COGBURN TO HOLMES
Holmes stands over him, hands on hips in standard superhero pose.
HOLMES:
(GIST)
Now, if you don't mind...a few INTERROGATORIES...!
Layout
13
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
14.
PAGE EIGHT
(1) AIR PARONGUS IN FLIGHT Not only is the plane swooping and diving crazily — it's vibrating with the sound of Cherries' screaming! CHERRIES: CHERRIES:
(BURST; FROM PLANE; OPEN FOR COLOR) EEE-YAAAGH!! Did you HEAR the RADIO?! At sundown, Pahkmani's going to EXECUTE my SISTER!!
(2) INT. PASSENGER COMPARTMENT - WIDE SHOT
Beryl has gone bonkers. She's screaming, ripping stuffing out of the passenger chair next to Brad. Duke is trying to wrestle her to the floor. Brad has rolled up in a ball. If he weren't wearing pants, he would literally have his head up his rear end.
CHERRIES: SFX: DUKE:
I'LL RIP HIS HEART OUT AND SPIT IN THE HOLE!!! (CHAIR RIPPING) R-R-RIIIP! Cut the HYSTERICS! We're gonna make Hoqoom before sundown— BARELY! (BURST)
(3)
WIDE NARROW PANEL - DUKE AND BERYL
Duke puts a scissor-lock on her and forces her to calm down.
DUKE: DUKE:
If we use the rest o' the flight to THINK— maybe we can figure a way to SAVE Opal! Start with that radio report! Where's Pahkmani HOLDIN' her...?
(4) CUT TO; EXT. ESTABLISHING SHOT - GREAT MOSQUE OF HOQOOM
Styled after the Al-Malwiyya mosque at Samarra. (See reference material attached, Jack.) It's an immense spiral minaret enclosed in a fence of barbed wire, standing alone in the middle of the desert. Far off in the distance, we see the tiny shapes of oil derricks. In another direction, we see
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE EIGHT (CONT)
(4, cont)
— just barely — the skyline of the city of Hoqoom. A jeep, carrying THREE GHOST BRIGADERS and VANILLA CUPCAKE is driving toward a gate in the barbed wire fence. ANOTHER GHOST BRIGADER is swinging the gate open.
CUPCAKE:
BRIGADER:
You guys are in deep ca-ca! When corporate headquarters hears about this...! Silence, American capitalist piglet! The decadent words of Satan's malodorous daughter mean NOTHING to us!
(5) ANGLE - DOOR INTO MOSQUE
The jeep has stopped by the door, and the Ghost Brigaders are roughly hauling Cupcake out of the jeep, toward the door. CUPCAKE:
Oh, yeah? Then wait’ll he gets a WHIFF of me! My VANILLA PHEROMONES will take the fight out of him!
(6)
INT. DOORWAY OF MOSQUE The bright sunlight outside is contrasted with the shadowy interior. We see the hem of Pahkmani's robe in f.g. of this panel, but that's it. Cupcake, however, sees him clearly — and reacts in horror! PAHKMANI:
You shall find that the dedicated warrior of Allah is quite IMMUNE to your charms— FIENDISH CHILD OF HELL!
Layout
15.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
16
PAGE NINE
(1)
FULL SHOT - PAHKMANI - NO BORDER AROUND PANEL - BLEED AT TOP, BOTTOM AT LEFT He dresses in black, floor-length robes like the Ayatollah, but under his black turban he wears a spherical yellow helmet that looks like PAC-MAN, except for its serrated teeth! (See bad drawing on next page.) He towers over Cupcake, pointing an accusing finger down at her. PAHKMANI:
PAHKMANI:
I have sworn holy vengeance upon the SATANIC STATES OF AMERICA— for its blasphemous intrusion into the affairs of this sacred land! I know your country well. I was a student there many years ago — before I forsook my former life.
(2) CUT TO: FLASHBACK - A GAS STATION IN THE AMERICAN DEEP SOUTH - EARLY 1960'S - BLEED OFF RIGHT OF PAGE - SEE LAYOUT
We see the doors to three restrooms, marked: LADIES, MEN, AND COLORED. A TALL, SLIM YOUNG MAN, wearing a burnoose and a Brooks Brothers suit is about to enter the door marked COLORED. A REDNECK SHERIFF is grabbing his coat-tails, restraining him. (NOTE: We do not see the young man's face. It's Pahkmani, twenty-odd years ago.) BLURB:
BLURB:
(GIST: PAHKMANI SPEAKING) "My father, AYATOLLAH YAASO PAHKMANI, was chief religious counsel to the hated SHEIK OF HOQOOM, friend of the wicked, oppressor of the righteous. "While in your country, I tried to align myself with its oppressed minorities. But the authorities forbade it!
(3)
FLASHBACK CONTINUES - A 1960's STUDENT RIOT - BLEED OFF RIGHT OF PAGE - SEE LAYOUT
A black limo is driving through the midst of it. Looking out the window of the limo is Young Pahkmani, his face again obscured in shadow.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
17.
PAGE NINE (CONT)
(3, cont) BLURB:
"I watched as your students rebelled against the decadent, warmongering policies of your nation, etc., etc. They had all the fun. Riots. Sit-ins. Scaring the bourgeois imperialists. I wanted a piece of the action.
(4)
FLASHBACK CONTINUES - A VIDEO ARCADE IN HOQOOM - SOME YEARS LATER - BLEED OFF RIGHT OF PAGE - SEE LAYOUT
Patrons of the arcade (all in Arab dress) are fleeing, as Young Pahkmani (face still hidden from view) chops up the videogame machines with an axe. (NOTE: The game machines all have pseudo-Arabic lettering.) BLURB:
"My chance came years later, when the people rose against the Sheik's regime. I was their leader— and I chose to use your own decadent western symbols to destroy your influence in Hoqoom."
BAD DRAWING OF PAHKMANI'S MASK (SIDE VIEW):
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18
PAGES TEN AND ELEVEN
(1)
INT. PAHKMANI'S MOSQUE - DOUBLE-PAGE SPREAD WITH INSET PANELS - SEE LAYOUT The overall design is like the PAC-MAN VIDEOGAME MAZE. Pahk mani, now in black robes and yellow helmet, is crawling on hands and knees along the bottom of Page Ten. His serrated mask is gobbling up a trail of meatballs that winds among the inset panels. He's followed by a squad of JOGGING GHOST BRIGADERS on the bottom of Page Eleven.
(2)
INSET PANEL - BLEED OFF LEFT MARGIN - PAHKMANI, HIS FATHER & THE SHEIK Pahkmani's father has a long salt-and-pepper beard and wears the same black turban as Pakmani...but he's dressed in a "Saturday Night Fever"-style white suit with black shirt, open halfway to the navel. He wears gold chains around his neck. The SHEIK is a Valentino type, also wearing the tradition headgear, but dressed in a suit and tie. Both are on their knees, with their hands tied behind their backs.
Pahkmani, in black robes and yellow helmet, stands over them with a scimitar raised over his head. He's about to bring it down and decapitate them!
BLURB:
"My corrupt father and his patron the sheik were among the first to die at my hand — along with the Western business men who brought your vile culture to my land!"
(3)
INSET PANEL - A KITCHEN IN THE MOSQUE Masked Ghost Brigaders are stuffing a severed human arm into a meat grinder! In the background, another Ghost Brigader, wearing a chef's hat atop his mask, is frying meatballs in a skillet!
BLURB:
"They were ground up, cooked...
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19.
PAGES TEN AND ELEVEN (CONT)
(4)
INSET PANEL - INT. CORRIDOR OF MOSQUE - END FLASHBACK One Ghost Brigader, walking backwards, holds the skillet full of meatballs. Another Ghost Brigader takes meatballs from the skillet with one hand and, with the other, hands them to a Third Ghost Brigader who squat-walks behind him. The Third Ghost Brigader is setting the meatballs down on the floor in a straight line (like the dots in the Pac-Man maze).
BLURB:
"—and then set out in a sacred pattern, so that I could devour them once and for all, and ELIMINATE them from our new order!"
(5) BACK TO PRESENT: INSET PANEL - BLEED OFF RIGHT MARGIN - PAHKMANI & CUPCAKE With one hand, he is lifting her roughly, by one arm, to the serrated mouth of his helmet. She's horrified. PAHKMANI:
CUPCAKE:
You will be tonight's dessert, little daughter of the devil! (GIST) W-w-wouldn't you rather have, y'know, some friendship with icing on top...? (GIST)
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PAGE TWELVE
(1) EXT. HOQOOM AIRPORT LANDING STRIP - DUSK
In f.g., we see Abuuk, Ashmet, Packer, and Jewel. Their backs are to us as they watch Upwind's private jet come in for a landing on the tarmac. Abuuk and Ashmet are both fingering the pistols they wear in belt holsters.
JEWEL: PACKER:
ABUUK:
(GIST) Impressed that Upwind would come here personally to inspect the site of the tragedy. (DIALOG INDICATES HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT BOMB, EXPECTS TO BE GOING HOME WITH UPWIND & WOBLINA) (VERY IMPRESSED WITH THE PLANE)
(2) ANGLE - HATCH OF THE LEARJET - WIDE SHOT
The plane has landed. Upwind is standing in the hatch. Abuuk, Ashmet, Packer and Jewel are walking up the small staircase to the plane. UPWIND: (GIST) We've brought the device we promised you, General. Hope we can trust your good judgment, etc. ABUUK: (GIST) My judgment is flawless in these matters, Mr. Upwind...
(3) TWO-SHOT - UPWIND AND ABUUK
Abuuk has drawn his pistol and is shoving the muzzle into Upwind's face. Upwind is horrified. Abuuk is grinning.
ABUUK:
(GIST)
...and I judge that Pahkmani has gone too far. Therefore, I commandeer this plane and all aboard.
(4)
ANGLE - THE PRIVATE JET
takes off again, with Abuuk, Packer, and Jewel aboard.
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21
PAGE TWELVE (CONT) (4, cont)
ABUUK:
(GIST)
We shall notify Pahkmani from the air that if he does not release your Cupcake immediately, he and his mosque shall be destroyed!
(5)
INT. PLANE - THE EXECUTIVE OFFICE AREA
Upwind, Woblina, Packer, and Jewel sit on the sofas. Abuuk and Ashmet stand over them, holding them at gunpoint. Upwind and Woblina confer in whispers. The bomb still rests on the marble block coffee table. UPWIND:
WOBLINA: UPWIND:
We have a problem, Woblina. Abuuk thinks the bomb is Hiroshima-sized. It's actually ten times more powerful than that. (GIST) If he drops it from the plane, we’ll all be killed! (GIST) That's the problem.
(GIST)
(6) CLOSEUP - WOBLINA
Brow furrowed in deep thought. WOBLINA:
(GIST; THOT) This is insane...and wasteful! Somebody has to stop this madness before Godcorp destroys itself! Layout
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22
PAGE THIRTEEN
(1) EXT. PAHKMANI'S MOSQUE - LONG SHOT - SAME The Air Parongus plane lands just yards outside the barbed wire fence. The plane lands with one wing tipped downward, sending up a roostertail of sand behind it! Two GHOST BRIGADERS are already running toward the plane with burp-guns aimed.
(2) ANGLE - HATCH OF AIR PARONGUS PLANE
As the Ghost Brigaders approach, the hatch swings wide open...but no one's there.
GHOSTS:
(GIST) Show yourselves, infidels! And die! Pahkmani has declared all aircraft to be instruments of Satan!
(3) CLOSER - THE HATCH
As the Ghost Brigaders pile into the plane. GHOSTS:
(GIST)
Okay...then we'll come inside and kill you!
(4)
INT. HATCH - ANGLE ON THE GHOST BRIGADERS From opposite sides of the panel, Duke's fist and Cherries's jawbreaker necklace each bash one of the Ghost Brigaders in the head!
(5)
ANGLE - DOOR OF MOSQUE Two Ghost Brigaders, both carrying burp-guns, enter the mosque. One is about four feet tall and has a beak protruding from his mask. The other is female and her mask is stretched tight over a perfectly spherical head. (Obviously, Duke and Beryl have appropriated the Ghost Brigaders' uniforms and weapons.)
DUKE:
(GIST)
We damn well better handle this fast. These disguises won't do us much good up close!
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE THIRTEEN (CONT)
(6) INT. SPIRAL STAIRCASE IN MOSQUE - ON DUKE AND BERYL
They are furtively climbing the stairs toward the top of the mosque's tower. They have heard weird chanting — some kind of ceremony — going on at the top of the stairs.
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24
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PAGE FOURTEEN
(1) EXT. GODCORP PRIVATE JET - ANGLE PAST JET TO PAHKMANI'S MOSQUE
We're looking down the fuselage of the plane as it flies toward the mosque. (2) INT. PRIVATE JET - ACROSS WOBLINA TO ABUUK Abuuk is now holding the bomb — and he still has Woblina, Packer, Upwind, and Jewel at gunpoint. (We don11 need to see them all in this panel, Jack.) But Woblina's starting to rise from the sofa, ever so subtly, preparing to make her move at Abuuk.
WOBLINA:
(THOT)
The Chairman of the Board and two division chiefs are on this plane! If we die, Godcorp will be plunged into chaos! I can't sit by and allow it.
(3) INT. PRIVATE JET - LARGE PANEL
As Woblina, her universal-jointed arms and legs flailing in half-a-dozen different directions, launches herself at Abuuk and Ashmet. She's kicking the gun out of Ashmet's hand with one leg, grabbing the handle of the bomb from Abuuk with the other! Upwind, Packer, and Jewel watch, astounded! WOBLINA:
(BURST)
GOTTA DANCE!!!
(4) INSET PANEL - CLOSEUP - ABUUK'S GUNHAND & WOBLINA'S FOOT
Her foot is kicking his hand! ceiling, is going off!
His gun, pointed toward the
(5) INSET PANEL - EXT. GODCORP PRIVATE JET
As the bullet bursts out of the top of the fuselage, the plane veers off — back toward the city of Hoqoom in the distance! (MORE)
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE FOURTEEN (CONT)
Layout
25.
26.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE FIFTEEN
(1) INT. MOSQUE TOWER
The room at the top of the tower — as Pahkmani prepares to execute Vanilla Cupcake. She is on her knees, her hands tied behind her back, tears streaming down her face. Pahkmani stands with his scimitar poised above her head. In b.g., Ghost Brigaders are wheeling in Pahkmani's meat grinder and a hot plate and skillet on little carts. In b.g., Duke and Beryl are coming onto the scene through the doorway to the spiral staircase! PAHKMANI: CUPCAKE:
BERYL:
(GIST) Prepare to die...! (GIST) Waaah! Pleeease! Take off that helmet and SMELL me—!! (GIST) Oh, no you don't...!!
(2) DUKE AND BERYL
charge out of the doorway, guns blazing! (3)
WIDE ANGLE - THE TOWER ROOM
In total chaos! Bullets are flying everywhere! are dropping like flies. Pahkmani is outraged. up, incredulous. PAHKMANI:
CUPCAKE:
Ghost Brigaders Cupcake looks
(GIST: YOU DARE DEFILE THIS SACRED GROUND WITH VIOLENCE!?) (BERYL? IS THAT YOU???)
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PAGE SIXTEEN
(1)
ANGLE ON DUKE As Pahkmani charges into panel, about to bring the scimitar down on Duke's head! PAHKMANI:
(GIST)
DIE, DUCK!!
(2) ANGLE - DUKE AND PAHKMANI
As Duke swings the burp-gun like a club, smashing Pahkmani alongside the head. Pahkmani is dropping the scimitar.
DUKE:
(GIST) Kiss my pin-feathers, you pus-sucking geek!
(3)
ANGLE - CHERRIES AND CUPCAKE
With one hand, Cherries fires her burp-gun (ala Sgt. Fury), mowing down an oncoming Ghost Brigader. With the other, she yanks on Cupcake's bonds, untying the knot and freeing her hands.
(4)
ANGLE - OVER GHOST BRIGADERS' SHOULDERS TO DOOR Two Ghost Brigaders are in f.g., with their backs to us. Duke has Pahkmani in a hammerlock and is dragging him toward the door. He's holding his rifle in the other hand — with the muzzle pointed right at Pahkmani's head. Cherries, holding Cupcake's hand, is entering panel at a run.
DUKE: CUPCAKE:
Anybody makes a move — and I blow laughing boy's brains from here to Tel Aviv! Beryl? Is that — a DUCK?!?
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28.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE SEVENTEEN
(1) INSET PANEL - THE PRIVATE JET spirals straight toward Hoqoom's tallest building — a steel and glass skyscraper in the heart of the city.
(2)
INSET PANEL - INT. JET - ON WOBLINA AND ABUUK They are engaged in a tug-of-war over the bomb. Its carrying case has unsnapped. Abuuk's hands are all over the switches as he tries to pull it back. Woblina gapes in horror!
WOBLINA
Oh my Godcorp!
You've armed the bomb!
(3)
UPWIND, PACKER, AND JEWEL
Their three faces pressed almost cheek-to-cheek. like they've just seen "Springtime for Hitler".
They look
(4) LARGE PANEL - THE PLANE AND THE SKYSCRAPER
The plane never hits the skyscraper. It's inches away when ...THE BOMB GOES OFF! The plane is dissolving away into atoms. The skyscraper is vaporizing, literally turning from steel and glass into radioactive steam! We are witnessing the first millisecond of a nuclear blast here, Jack. The entire scene is "washed out" to black-and-white by the flash of the bomb!
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29.
PAGE EIGHTEEN
JACK: BLEED ALL FOUR PANELS OFF THE PAGE. TOP AND BOTTOM PANELS SHOULD BLEED OFF TOP AND BOTTOM OF PAGE, AS WELL AS SIDES. (1) ANGLE - THE SPOT WHERE THE SKYSCRAPER STOOD An IMMENSE FIREBALL has formed where the skyscraper stood. The fireball is expanding outward across the city.
(2) HOQOOM STREET SCENE
The traditional Arab buildings we've seen in previous issues. As the fireball "moves thru" this panel, it reduces the buildings — and the people on the street — to ashes.
(3)
CLOSE - COGBURN coming out of a building at the outer edge of the city. The shockwave of the explosion is blowing the building away, as if it were made of cardboard. The heat of the blast is setting the flying pieces of the building aflame. Cogburn's body is suffering the same fate. Both of his arms are being blown off, and the rest of him goes up in flames as we watch. The flesh is dripping from his body like candle wax, exposing the bone underneath! (Yeah, I know it's disgusting — but this is actually what happens in one of these blasts.)
(4)
WIDE SHOT - LARGER PANEL - THE CITY (OR WHAT'S LEFT OF IT) And there isn't much. The center of the city is now an immense, black crater, several miles in diameter. At the outer edge of the city, only the skeletons of buildings are left standing, and these are in flames. A mushroom cloud is rising up over the devastation.
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30.
PAGE NINETEEN
(1) ANGLE - PAST AIR PARONGUS PLANE TO PAHKMANI'S MOSQUE
The plane is flying toward us. Far in b.g., we see the mushroom cloud rising over the city and the upper third or so of the mosque's tower shaking apart — hit by the last of the shockwave. CHERRIES:
DUKE:
PABLO:
(FROM PLANE) My god— it's a MUSHROOM CLOUD! Somebody NUKED the city! (FROM PLANE) Pablo! Change course! Get upwind o' that cloud— FAST! (FROM PLANE) Hupweend, downweend— wha' chu wan' me to do— leek my feenger and steek it outside?!
(2)
INT. COCKPIT Duke has rushed in and is grabbing the stick in the co-pilot's position. He's turning it hard. Pablo's stick (naturally) is jumping out of his limp, drunken hands.
DUKE:
(GIST)
I'm not gonna get us MUTATED just 'cause you're drunk, Parongus!
(3)
INT. PASSENGER SECTION In b.g., Brad is stretched out over the tops of two seats. His knees hang over one seat, his arms dangle over the back of the one directly in front of it. He is staring up blankly at the ceiling. Cherries (sans helmet) sits on the arm of a passenger chair. Cupcake is seated in the chair across the aisle from her, looking very unsettled. CUPCAKE:
CHERRIES:
(GIST) Mama was in the city, Beryl. She must've got nuked along with it— and Pookface Packer, too! (GIST) That means you don't have to be Vanilla Cupcake anymore, sweetie. Your contract with Godcorp is finished.
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE NINETEEN (CONT)
(4)
CLOSEUP - CUPCAKE
Looking very frightened. CUPCAKE:
(WONDERS WHAT THE FUTURE HAS IN STORE FOR THEM NOW, WHERE THEY'LL GO, WHAT THEY'LL DO, ETC.)
(5)
ANOTHER ANGLE - CHERRIES AND CUPCAKE
Cherries kneels beside Cupcake, takes her hand, comforts her. CHERRIES:
(I'LL BE YOUR GUARDIAN — AND MAYBE WE'LL JUST GO INTO BUSINESS FOR OURSELVES)
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32.
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PAGE TWENTY
(1) EXT. NEW YORK SKYLINE - FEATURING DESTROYER LAWYER'S OFFICE BUILDING - COUPLE DAYS LATER
We saw this building in DD #2, Jack.
DUKE: HOLMES:
DUKE: HOLMES:
(FROM BLDG) Upwind, Packer, and Strangelegs — all DEAD? (FROM BLDG) They were aboard the plane that carried the bomb, Duke. So was Mrs. Mudge. (FROM BLDG) Where does that leave Godcorp? (FROM BLDG) A shambles. Congress has ordered them to pay REPARATIONS to Hoqoom— in excess of a TRILLION DOLLARS.
(2)
INT. LAWYER'S OFFICE Duke is sitting in the plush chair again, looking grim. is pacing the floor, his cape streaming behind him. HOLMES:
DUKE: DUKE:
Holmes
They're dismantling the conglomerate, liquefying its assets to raise the cash. Then it's gonna be practically IMPOSSIBLE to track down the ANSWER I need. IS the Little Guy alive— or NOT?
(3)
CLOSE - DUKE Still very grim. DUKE:
(GIST)
I can't go back home, Holmes— not 'til I know for SURE.
(4) CLOSE - DESTROYER LAWYER
Nods, understanding.
HOLMES:
(GIST: HE UNDERSTANDS. TELLS DUKE TO STAY IN TOUCH. IF HE COMES UP WITH RELEVANT INFORMATION, HE'LL RELAY IT)
Destroyer Duck #5 - Continuity
PAGE TWENTY (CONT)
(5) ANGLE - DOOR TO DESTROYER LAWYER'S OFFICE
Duke and Holmes are shaking hands.
HOLMES: DUKE:
(GIST: WHAT ARE DUKE'S PLANS? WILL HE NEED ANY MONEY TO TIDE HIM OVER?) (GIST: NO. FIRST ORDER OF BUSINESS IS TO BECOME BECOME SELF-SUPPORTING.)
(6)
SMALL PANEL - CREDIT BOX
In a corner of the panel is a stone sculpture of the Godcorp hand-crushing-the-worId insignia — with a crack down its length. The rest of the panel will be used for this issue's credits. (Except for our own "created by" credit, which will appear on page one.)
(7) NEXT ISSUE BLURB
LEAVE BLANK 1-INCH STRIP ACROSS BOTTOM OF PAGE FOR COMING ATTRACTIONS BLURB.
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