I see everything.
 
a
digital
zine
by
tylr
cailyn
gottschalk
 
Dermatillomania pick, pick rip
me
apart.
bloody
scabs,
barely fresh I
blood
on
can
feel
slowly come
healed,
dry
skin.
my
chest
caving
closer
to
this
rotting thriving
youth my
flesh.
name
softly;
come
closer.
I more
body,
decaying
healthy call
in.
than
like the
you rest.
pick, pick
 
put soft
me
back
scars
on
on
from
a
distorted.
distance
tucked
away
hiding
in
slowly
tear
much
as
create call I
am
plain
new
both
decimated
view,
beg
to
heal,
within
my
cheeks. weeks.
of
temple
hidden,
safe. my
the
is
lace.
in
massacre
for
the
holes ones
a
violence
beneath
they
it
my
self. and
health.
the
ruins,
my
rough
faded
discolored,
me
over
up. feet.
thighs, time.
do
I
this I
really body
am
drifter
a
have
the
right
to
call
home? breathless
lost
in
the
list
of
sins,
unknown.
 
when
I
see
my
burdened I
can
no I
is
longer can
no
own the feel longer
reflection, pretender. the
pain.
remember.
Sober transparency  
hold
me
give
into
erase
holy, God’s
my
former
understanding surrender,
transparency.
full
in
I to
is
the
delicacy amongst perfected only
burn
every
remnant
start to
the
painstakingly bodily
the
fire, ground.
tear
temple
this down.
to
nothingness;
picture
whom
there
empty,
of
my
myself
to
pretender.
sober
of
match
faith.
myself
paint
single
of
color
so
a
grace.
find be. beauty
absence. hidden harsh each tear
scars; brick the
wall
apart.
 
Little Pieces of the Left Behind bruises blackened fingertips choke
I
violet.
press
away
deeper;
my
can
breath. feel
you
closing
in.
softly, clawing
left,
into
slowly, my
neck.
tell
me
what
your
violence
over
and
over
you will
know show
again.
of
death.
itself
in
my
violet
 
the I
day will
force slowly
of
your
dress myself picking
funeral,
myself to
in
brush out
the
black. my
hair,
mattes.
out shake
of
focus; my
head
like a photograph.
clarity
will
not
come
back.
In Bloom.
desperate search
escape;
for
outside
white
delicate guide a
me
through.
infectious begging
Hand with flower
drained
craving
clarity;
held
hostage this
blind
barely
covering
let
bleeding
outside.
me
rest
the
awhile,
wind.
illuminate
this
awaken
in
the
of
hospital
my
smiling, sweat;
IV.
guide, me
feel
in
hands
doorways,
take
drenched
bondage.
search
static
I’m
veins.
despondent.
this
and
beginnings,
release
trembling
2 am
unknown.
blurry,
by
it’s
world,
suddenly
from
walls.
fingertips,
familiar
so
breath
blind darkness room.
laughing.
skin.
I
instagram; facebook; email; thank
dreamt
of
@scumflowr @tylr
cailyn
gottschalk
@tylrgottschalk@gmail.com you
for
your
endless
support.
a
life
in
bloom.