Always true
Behind the scenes WITH GAINESVILLE'S MOST STYLISH START-UP
THAT can BRING YOUR FAMILY TOGETHER
How to let the
universe
give you what you want
Aileen Mack
Alexandra Booth
Janine Wolf
Lauren Rowland
Mary kate CObb
elise Engle
Jacob Embuscado
Ariana Brasman
Chloe Stradinger
Li Stalder
Diana Illingworth
Nina Cusmano
Rebecca Rubin
Nicole Irving
Social Media Editor
Editor in Chief
Editor in Chief
Director of Marketing
Photography Editor
Blog Editor
Social Media Editor
Copy Editor
Copy Editor
Copy Editor 2
Orange & Blue
Art Director
Blog Editor
Director of Marketing
Adviser
This magazine was truly a labor of love. Each photo, story and layout were dreamed up and brought to life by our wonderful staff of 13. The biggest challenge was choosing a theme. What could we create that would have a lasting impact? How could we connect with the community? Thus, The Connected Issue was born. (Clever, we know.) To us, being connected is about more than adding someone on LinkedIn. We wanted to surpass society's standard definitions of relationships and explore how people find meaning through connections with people, pets, food, technology, community and the universe. Some of the most meaningful connections come from unexpected places. One couple found love at KFC (pg. 25). Some people are in relationships with people they've never even met (pg. 32). Others search for fortuitous links in the sky (pg. 54). Whatever you connect with, we hope this issue inpsires you to embrace the unexpected and find joy in each and every one of your relationships.
We would like to thank our wonderful adviser, Nicole Irving, Ted Spiker, Diane McFarlin, Spiro Kiousis, Martha Collada and Hal Herman. We also extend a huge thanks to our beautiful cover model, Madison Nagle, and our fabulous photographer, Chris Totkze. Orange & Blue is published semiannually by the University of Florida College of Journalism and Communications students enrolled in Applied Magazines. This issue was printed by StorterChilds Printing, Inc. Copyright 2017. All rights reserved. No part of this magazine may be reproduced or transmitted in any means without written permission. Orange & Blue is protected through trademark registration in the United States. Send letters to Box 118400 College of Journalism and Communications, University of Florida, Gainesville, FL 32611. Orange & Blue
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the companionship of dogs
Furry friends provide happiness, friendship and love.
37
People of Gainesville
Man-on-the-street interviews reveal interesting locals
42
the law of attraction
The power of acheiving your goals through the universe.
60
around the family table
Staffer explores how daily dinners helped strengthen her relationship with her family.
62
THE ECCENTRIC EATING EXPERIENCE Three local burgers that will surprise your taste buds and satisfy your appetite.
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fashion feature 4
Gainesville start-up designs stylish apparel to connect with a lost brother. Orange & Blue
Food 64
coffee connection
Local restaurateur connects communities through coffee.
66
wine & cheese
Cheesy ways to get fancy with the world's most classic hors d’oeuvres.
Health
Culture
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45
Major beef: how breaking up with meat can be good for you.
A tale of two cities: a staffer explores her connection with two homes.
meatless diets
12
meditation
Meditating can cure physical and mental pain.
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chronic illness
People with chronic illnesses cope through connections.
germany & THE USA
Relationships 46 MUSIC 19
FORGIVENESS
Giving up grudges can be good for everyone.
22
OPPOSITES ATTRACT
Do opposites really attract? The age-old proverb only goes so far.
24
MONEY TIPS
Simple ways to love your wallet.
Despite different tastes and styles, music flows through all of us.
LifeStyle 52
travel photography
Style 80
ENTREPRENEURS
The new way student entrepreneurs are connecting with customers.
82
MAKEUP
Save vs. Splurge!
More about the trend of using Instagram to document travels.
54
ASTROLOGY
What does your zodiac sign say about you?
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Orange & Blue
fitness buddy: your smartphone
Health Apps
BY Rebecca Rubin PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze For the hour per day Madalyn Pappadakis spends at the gym, her phone functions as much more than a device to text friends or check social media. Instead, it serves as her modified personal trainer. Pappadakis, 20, uses her iPhone to time her workouts and track her heart rate. But mainly, she uses phone applications as her exercise guide. These days, gym junkies aren’t looking just to trainers anymore to guide their workouts. Smartphones have seamlessly provided the link between accessibility and fitness. Now, individuals are turning to technology to show them the ropes. “It’s, in a way, defeating the purpose of having an instructor because you’re having your phone tell you what to do,” said Alivia Perrone, a fitness instructor at the University of Florida's Department of Recreational Sports. Pappadakis primarily uses the e-book “Bikini Body Guide” and the phone app Sweat with Kayla, which were both created by Australian personal trainer Kayla Itsines. The 102-page e-book goes into detail on how to pursue a healthy lifestyle, complete with a 12-week exercise plan made up of 28-minute workouts. The step-by-step instructions give Pappadakis the confidence to know she’s doing the exercise properly without having a trainer physically with her. “It’s easier to swipe between the pages than to actually flip through 100 pages,” she said. “If it weren’t for my phone, I wouldn’t do the workouts.” Griffin Gabler, 21, uses an iOS app called StrongLifts 5x5 to shape his weightlifting workouts. After entering
his height and weight, the app shaped a regimen specific to his ability level. Now it tells him which exercises to perform, the proper weights he should be using and how many sets to do. “It makes it extremely easy to structure your workouts and keep you on schedule,” he said. He’s even used his phone to check his technique. Gabler has asked friends to record videos of him to ensure he’s executing a move properly. “You have a guide in your pocket that shows you how to properly perform each exercise,” he said. “The stopwatch functionality is great for timing.” Even fitness empires are getting in on this movement. Orangetheory Fitness, an international fitness franchise, uses heart-rate monitors in the group highintensity interval training workouts. This allows members to track their performance in real time on in-class monitors and phone applications, Karen Tumbleson, studio manager at Orangetheory Millhopper explained.
But more than just as an instructor, technology can serve as a motivating factor, Perrone added. Tumbleson emphasized the accountability factor that technology provides. Both during and after the workout, participants are able to visualize the work they put in. She said users get the sense of saying to themselves, “‘I’m not going to be able to fake my way through it or not be honest with myself about how hard I worked because it’s going to be right there color-coded in front of me.’” While there is no harm in working out alone, Perrone highlighted the responsibility technology has as a partner in encouraging a deeper and more powerful workout. “Working out by yourself, you kind of have that feeling like, ‘Yeah, I’ll push myself,’ but when you’re working out with someone else, it forces you to work a little harder than you would by yourself,” Perrone said.
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Health Vegetarian
It's not You, It's ME(AT) BY Lauren Rowland PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze Breakups don’t always have to be a bad thing. After getting dumped by Warner in the movie "Legally Blonde," Elle Woods started taking herself more seriously and got into Harvard Law. One Direction split up, but now the guys are producing some pretty great singles. Breaking up with meat can be good for you, too. Not eating meat has been normal since Natalie Rossian was 9 years old, and for the last 10 years, she has steered clear of all meat. There was no specific moment or reason she decided not to stop eating meat; she just slowly started eliminating it from her diet. First, she tossed red meat, and then she got picky about the other types of meat she would eat. “I didn’t know what it meant to be vegetarian,” Rossian said. “I just stopped eating meat.” Being vegetarian is not an excuse for the 19-year-old to eat junk food or carb-load, but rather a reason to experiment with fruits and vegetables. Rossian makes sure she does not get bored of the food she is eating by trying different protein options, finding new recipes from her mom and testing out new seasonings she finds at the store. Staying active and eating healthy are important lifestyle choices Rossian says make her feel the healthiest.
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“I love to work out and kickbox. Any way to stay active combined with being a vegetarian is what makes me feel best,” she said. In fact, eating vegetarian can be nutritionally superior to any other way of eating because plant-based food is loaded with nutrients that protect overall health, said Katherine Tallmadge, a licensed dietitian and former media spokeswoman for the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. Eggs, beans and quinoa have become steady staples in Rossian's diet. Her favorite meal to make is a homemade veggie burger with a side of spaghetti squash topped with freshly-made tomato sauce. The most important nutrients for people who are considering becoming vegetarian include iron, zinc, iodine, calcium and vitamins D and B-12, Tallmadge said. The smell of meat no longer bothers Rossian, but she says a lot of other vegetarians she knows cannot stand the sight and smell of it. She says it takes some time to adjust before you stop craving it. “I promise after a while you won’t even think about meat, and it will become second nature to not eat meat,” she says. If you are considering the switch to a meatless diet, Rossian warns you to
Protein:
Peas, beans, lentils, chickpeas, seeds, nuts, soy products and whole grains.
Vitamin B-12:
Dairy, eggs, cereal and soy beverages. Supplements are also available because a deficiency can cause neurological problems.
Iron:
Vitamin C from fruits and vegetables and phytic acid from whole grains, beans, lentils, seeds and nuts.
Omega-3 Fatty Acids: Flaxseed, walnuts, canola oil and soy.
be prepared for people to assume you eat carbs for every meal. “The first question I always get is, 'What do you eat?'” she said. “People think the only thing to eat is pasta and pizza all day.” It especially annoys her when people question her strength based on her food choices. Starting a vegetarian diet can be beneficial, Tallmadge said, but only if your diet is void of processed and high-fat foods. Avoiding a diet made up of nuts is ideal because they’re low in protein compared to their caloric value. She recommends reading a book about becoming a vegetarian, like “The New Becoming Vegetarian:
The Essential Guide to a Healthy Vegetarian Diet” or speaking with a nutritionist to help you get started. There are many reasons people choose to break up with meat, from health to animal welfare. But for Grace Makley, it was the environment that made her call it quits with meat. Eighteen months ago, her love affair with cheeseburgers and fried chicken came to a halt after watching the documentary “Cowspiracy.” The film claimed that the human race was going extinct because of the consumption of meat and dairy products. For those considering ditching meat, Makley says, “Make sure you aren't eating processed foods to make up
for what you aren't eating. A lot of people make the mistake of eating lots of processed foods and carbs to fill them, but become nutrient deficient because they aren't getting necessary vitamins from veggies, fruits and other important food groups.” Rossian and Makley both agree that becoming a vegetarian is easier than people make it out to be, and the lifestyle change will leave you feeling healthier. But Rossian explained that it is all about making sure you properly replace your proteins. “My advice is to truly explore each protein substitution so you never feel like you don’t have an option,” she said.
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Health Connected
Is TOO COnnected? WITH INCREASED ONLINE COMMUNICATION, THE LINE BETWEEN SHARING AND OVERSHARING IS BLURRED
BY Nina Cusmano PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze “People all around the world are participating in conversations and discussions and have more access to see things,” he said. “When that plays out well, it’s great. It’s an equalizer so people don’t necessarily need a full library next to them; they can just have a phone.”
However, with social media, they will do so on a different timeline, he said.
For Valerie Howard, 55, social media is a good addition to her life. She mainly uses Facebook because it allows her to keep in touch with people.
Brian Butler is a professor and senior associate dean at the University of Maryland College of Information Studies.
The largest drawback from the movement to online communication is what Butler called "mistaken equivalence." He said people believe speaking on the phone or through email is the same as face-to-face communication. Seeing the reactions on people’s faces rather than just listening to their voice is much more important than people realize.
“People want to act like an online interaction is the same as face-to-face,” Butler said. “It’s not the same. It’s not good or bad; it’s just different.”
If you want to lie, he said, speak on the phone, because it's much easier to hide deception in your voice than with your facial expression and voice in person.
Howard said some of her friendships have shifted from annual phone calls to getting updates on Facebook instead.
He said the increase in technology and social media use in society is something that yields change but ultimately does not change what it means to be human. He believes greater access and connectivity are the main advantages of social media networks.
As far as relationships go, Butler said social media prolongs friendships that otherwise would have faded quicker. Children can use their smartphones to keep in touch with friends from elementary school that may not attend the same middle school. It's likely these friendships will eventually still fade.
As social media platforms like Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat grow increasingly popular, how is human connection being affected? With interactions moving online, sharing your location, information and thoughts has become easier than ever. The results can be both good and bad. From keeping in touch with distant friends to aiding detrimental domestic violence situations, technology has a larger impact on our relationships than we might think.
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“Access and connectivity is always a double-edged sword, which is why we have boundaries,” he said. “It opens up new ways to be connected and new ways to shut things out.”
“I talk to friends that I haven’t talked to in 30 or 40 years,” Howard said. “I grew up in Alabama until I was 16, and I’ve reconnected with people that I haven’t seen since I moved.”
“Even though we may not directly talk to each other via Facebook, I feel like we’re in touch just because you can see what’s going on in their lives,” she said. Howard has three sons, aged 17, 19 and 22. She said social media is a huge form of communication for her sons.
“None of my sons would be friends with me on Facebook, but now that they’re all doing Instagram and that other one – Snapchat – they’re all friends with me on Facebook,” she said. “If they would add me to Snapchat, I would get to see what’s going on, but they won’t do that.” Abigail Miller is a 20-year-old college student, around the same age as Howard’s sons. She uses Snapchat, Facebook and Instagram daily. Miller also uses Find My Friends, an app that “allows you to easily locate friends and family using your iPhone, iPad or iPod Touch,” according to its description on the iTunes App Store. Miller has 12 friends’ and family members’ locations on the app, and she checks it at least once a day. She uses the app to locate her friends across campus. If they are picking her up, she will use it check to see how close they are. She has been using the app to share her location with friends for about a year and has been sharing her location with her parents since she was in high school. Having the app makes her feel safer, Miller said. “If I’m walking home from the library late at night, it’s nice to know that 12 people can track my location and see where I am if something bad happens.” If she’s bored in class, sometimes Miller uses the app to check on her friends. If their locations seem strange, she sends them a text message to make sure everything is OK. Miller also has friends who use the app to share their location with a significant other. “It can get controlling if you’re dating someone,” she said. “I haven’t been in a serious relationship since Find My Friends has been popular, but I don’t think I’d want my boyfriend to always have my location. I’ve seen my friends be weird about it. It creates unnecessary trust issues.” Brandi Corbin, director of residential programs at Peaceful Paths Domestic Abuse Network, said seemingly innocent location sharing could lead to dire consequences incertain relationships. Before leaving an abusive relationship, social media or smartphones are often a battered partner’s connection to the outside world and a way to ask for help. Abusers who have access to accounts and passwords can sabotage emails and messages reaching out to family,
friends or shelters like Peaceful Paths. Corbin said some abusers manipulate their partner into sharing passwords and locations by telling them it will prove they are trustworthy. “They say, ‘Well, I’m an open book,’ or ‘Don’t you trust me? I trust you, here’s access to my email,’ and they put these things out there just to prove they are trustworthy, even though that’s not necessarily a healthy way to be in a relationship,” Corbin said. In domestic violence situations, the victim is often in the most danger directly following the escape of the relationship or when they seek help, according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence. So, Corbin said, keeping a victim’s location secret once they leave an abusive situation can be imperative to their safety. She
and other domestic violence advocates work with victims to create a safety plan, which includes making the dangers of social media clear. However, they let the victims make their own decisions about how active they want to be online. Aspects of social media and technology that are incorporated into the safety plans include checking-in at locations on Facebook and tweeting about where you are. Abusive partners may track a pattern of locations victims visit to predict where they might be in the future, which is the concern, Corbin said. “It’s another layer. It’s another access point for a batterer. It’s another way to control them. It’s another way to be deceptive,” she said.
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Health Meditation
Mindfulness of Meditation CONNECT TO YOUR MIND TO EASE THE ACHES OF YOUR BODY
BY Alexandra Booth PHOTOGRAPHY BY Elise engle
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Take a random person off any street in any city. On the surface, he or she could seem happy and satisfied with life, but it could also be an illusion. People are fighting their own battles. Physical illnesses, stress, anxiety, migraines – you never know what’s hiding under the surface. Now, if these people were told about a simple and inexpensive way to help relieve their symptoms that they could practice anywhere, wouldn’t they take it? This can’t be achieved through medication or surgery, but rather through meditation. The idea of meditation has been around for thousands of years, with historians believing it was practiced beginning in 3000 BCE. However, the earliest documented records show it starting in 1500 BCE in India. According to News Medical, the terminology “meditate” was introduced around 12 AD. It has been the core of several religious traditions and ceremonies in Judaism, Hinduism and Taoism. There are different types of meditation that are used for both religious purposes and relaxing. While there are many versions of meditation practiced around the world, these are the most common in the United States, according to Everyday Health: • Mindfulness: A part of the Buddhist religion, this meditation focuses on breathing and connecting with the present moment. Psychology Today also reports that mindfulness meditation has been “proven to change brain structure and have dramatic physical and psychological effect.” • Transcendental: This meditation is part of the Hindu religion. It focuses on mantras, or repetition of words or phrases, to center focus and thoughts. • Vipassana: Also called insight meditation, vipassana focuses on the deep connection between body and mind as a way of healing. It is thought to have been taught by the Buddha. • Zen: This meditation requires a closing of thought to open someone to a deeper level of concentration. Yoga is another way to meditate. It combines the mindfulness, breathing and focus of meditation while adding a variety of movements for flexibility and balance. Meditation can be used to help with a variety of different problems in a person’s life. The Mayo Clinic mentions
the benefits of meditation, especially medical conditions that could be made worse by stress. Meditating can manage the symptoms of asthma, depression, high blood pressure, sleeping problems and others. When our bodies feel stressed, an adrenaline rush kicks in our “flight or fight” response, making our blood pressure rise, heart race and breathing heavier. The meditative “relaxation response,” created in the 1970s by Harvard physician Herbert Benson, helps with therapy against this response. According to MedicineNet, the relaxation response requires the silent repetition of a word or phrase for 10 to 20 minutes. It’s suggested to meditate while sitting up in a quiet place, as this will help to lower blood pressure and slow heart rate. Using meditation can also help with anxiety. According to Psychology Today, researchers at Wake Forest Baptist did a study where they took 15 people with normal levels of anxiety. After going through four 20-minute classes of mindful meditation, the volunteers’ anxiety levels dropped from each session through brain scanning. The EOC Institute in San Francisco conducted additional anxiety and meditation research. They have found 11 ways that meditation decreases anxiety levels, such as: • Using meditation deactivates “the wandering mind” part of the brain, called the posterior cingulate cortex (PCC), and causes more focus. • Mindfulness meditation can dramatically decrease the amount of cortisol, which is the body’s main stress hormone. Some studies showed decreases up to 50 percent. • Our emotions can be measured by our brainwave patterns. When we feel worried, our anxious “beta” brainwaves increase. However, we can counteract that with our happier and healthier “alpha,” “theta” and “delta” brainwaves through meditation. • Like exercise, meditation is a natural endorphins booster. It creates the same effect as a “runner's high” by improving mood, decreasing stress, relieving pain, and aiding with sleep. Meditation and yoga cannot only be beneficial for mental illnesses and ailments but also for physical therapy. Carrie Mayes got into yoga when she was 16 years old. She was recovering from a serious spinal injury.
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to rap and hip-hop artists like Kid Cudi, Chance the Rapper or Kanye West. “I hear things that I’ve never paid attention to or heard before and the only thing I think about is listening to the music,” she said. In traditional meditation, music would not be used. However, more people like Gott are starting to use music or soundtracks as guided meditations. Today, according to the Chopra Center, meditation is taught in “colleges, medical clinics, yoga studios, corporate wellness programs” and other places all over the country. People are beginning to realize the many health benefits meditation can offer. However, the Mayo Clinic suggests that people talk to their health care provider about the positives and negatives of meditation to see what is right for their health problems. The Mayo Clinic does give some tips about how to start practicing meditation. It’s important to breathe deeply and maintain that breath. This is a good skill for beginners to focus on. Engaging in mindfulness and transcendental meditation with mantras can also be helpful, in addition to reading, walking on a trail, focusing on the body and praying. “Yoga came first and then a little meditation practice came second,” she said. Ever since her injury was healed, Mayes has maintained yoga and meditation in her everyday life, practicing two to three times a week. She likes to maintain a healthy lifestyle and finds that it’s when she doesn’t practice that she is more stressed and not fully present. “I would suggest to others if they would like to improve health and function of muscle tissue and bring ease to everyday life,” she said. “Breathing for 5 minutes does a world of good for stress and anxiety. I highly recommend it for anyone in a high-pressure situation.” Meditation can also be used to help with migraines and chronic headaches. According to Everyday Health, “meditation has been shown to help offset the symptoms of chronic pain.” In one study, 72 percent of chronic pain patients experienced lower pain levels when undergoing meditation therapy. Another study showed high levels of pain tolerance and fewer
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migraines from patients. The Art of Living also suggests several yoga poses to lessen the pain of migraines. For example, child's pose can help with reducing pain and calming the nervous system, downward facing dog pose can increase blood circulation and therefore decrease headache, and bridge pose can reduce anxiety by calming the mind. There are many ways to meditate that revolve around breathing and reciting mantras. Rachel Gott has tried different types of meditation before to try and relax her mind, but nothing really stuck with her until she tried it with music. She likes to close her eyes and really focus on the words of the song or the background music or instruments. “Usually during the day I have a million different things on my mind at once, so it’s nice to just think about one thing and relax rather than all the homework or things I have to do,” she said. Gott doesn’t have a favorite type of music to meditate to. She said she sometimes listens to alternative and rock artists like Billy Joel, Jason Mraz or Ed Sheeran, but other times she’ll listen
There are different yoga studios in Gainesville that offer classes involving meditation. Searchlight Yoga, on 3501 SW 2nd Ave., has a “Foundations” class that teaches basic yoga positions and breathing techniques, in addition to the “Gentle” and “Yin” that are nurturing and meditative for any skill level. Located on 530 N. Main St., Sanctuary Yoga offers “Jivamukti Yoga” that is rooted in meditation, chanting, relaxation and practicing breath work. This meditation studio also has “Gentle Yoga” and “Yin and Flow Yoga.” Flow Space on 117 NW 16th Ave. teaches classes in “Vinyasa Yoga” that focus on “a breath oriented sequence” that helps clear and center thoughts. A few things to consider: meditation is a very personal practice and each person must find the right way for him or her to use it. It takes time to develop the skills some meditations take, but don’t stress about it. It comes with practice. Keep in mind that while researchers and articles suggest against using only meditation, it can be used as an additional treatment option and a way to live a healthier lifestyle.
Health Chronic
Chronic Coping HAVING AN INVISIBLE ILLNESS CAN TAKE A TOLL PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY (AND EVERYONE DEALS WITH IT DIFFERENTLY)
BY Nina Cusmano PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze
Claudia Hall had never been sick. She had the measles and mumps and other childhood illnesses but had otherwise been healthy. When she was 39, she was diagnosed with her first autoimmune disease. She currently lives with five autoimmune diseases. Hall, 66, has been diagnosed with Hashimoto’s disease, myasthenia gravis, pernicious anemia, diabetes and lichen sclerosis. All are autoimmune diseases and each affects her differently. An autoimmune disease occurs when the body attacks its own organs, tissues and cells, according to the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases website. Sometimes known as invisible or chronic illnesses, autoimmune diseases cannot be cured, only treated. The NIAID reported there are more than 80 autoimmune diseases. Because these diseases are invisible, the people who have them usually look healthy on the outside and
therefore often don’t feel understood when they talk about their illness.
Claudia’s Paws and Claws to a friend and focus on her mental and physical health.
Hall worked as an accountant for doctors. She loved working for the doctors and credits the relationships she built with the medical professionals in Gainesville for helping her through her health struggles. After years in a profession she loved, she made the choice to venture out on her own to start a new business.
MG is a neuromuscular disease that causes muscle weakness and affects about 200,000 people in the U.S. each year, according to the Mayo Clinic. Some days, her legs will not work. Other days, it will be her tongue. It's caused her to choke on food several times, which she described as terrifying.
Her new business, Claudia’s Paws and Claws, was a thriving and successful pet grooming business, and she loved going to work every day. Then, one morning, she woke up and could not stand up. This was the onset of her second autoimmune disease, myasthenia gravis (MG), which means grave muscle weakness. It was the beginning of a lifestyle change for Hall. Doctor’s orders were to live stress-free. Flare-ups of her diseases are triggered by stress, so she had to sell
“I maintain as best I can, and my close friends, they understand, and my family. So, I have the support but we don’t talk about it. I’ll just say I’m having a bad day today and that’s it,” she said. She believes having a relationship with a physician who you trust and knows you is extremely important if you have a chronic illness. Her neurologist recommended she take an easy yoga class at Studio 221 in Perry, Florida. She took his advice and has now been attending an average of three times a week for the last five years. It has
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ALLIE CARTER, 21, DEALS WITH INVISIBLE ILLNESS IN THE FORM OF CROHN'S DISEASE.
become a way for her to cope with stress and has supported her mental wellness and overall balance.
her independence but is easier on her body. She tries to live as independently as is safe and possible for her.
In addition to her yoga routine, the strong relationships she has made with her doctors and the support of friends and family, Hall has one more source of help these days. Her service dog, Reggie, will alert her when she needs to eat because of her diabetes. Since she lives alone, she said she depends greatly on the 3-year-old Yorkshire Terrier.
“I still go and do as much as I possibly can,” she said. “I’m just more conscious of someone knowing where I am and what I’m doing.” Allie Carter, 21, has faced her own struggles while dealing with Crohn’s disease, a chronic inflammatory bowel disease. Inflammatory bowel diseases affect about 1.3 million Americans, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention's website. She started having symptoms of Crohn’s when she was in middle school but was not officially diagnosed until she started college in 2014.
Although Hall has to make some adjustments to her daily routines and sometimes needs help from friends, including her furry friend, she still strives to be independent. Hall has ridden a motorcycle since she was a teenager. With the diagnosis of the MG, she sometimes wasn’t strong enough to handle the weight of a motorcycle by herself. Instead of giving up riding, she got one with three wheels. The trike allows her to maintain
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Because her disease is so draining, she cannot take full-time classes at the University of Florida, where she is majoring in women’s studies. Carter said it is difficult when friends and family in her
life do not understand how sick she is. “Some people just don’t get it. They ask too much of you ... They think you’re flaky, and they don’t get that you just can’t do things,” she said. Having empathetic people in her life is helpful, she said. Carter said she thinks her parents may not have understood just how sick she was until a serious infection almost killed her. The infection was at the site of a port that was placed on her shoulder. In high school, the parents of her boyfriend at the time validated the severity of her illness. Their medical background helped them understand, she said. Now, her best friend and her boyfriend are extremely empathetic through her daily ups and downs. Carter is one of the UF students who take advantage of resources at the Disability Resource Center. Beth Roland, assistant
nina's story:
director and learning specialist at the DRC, said being a person on-campus who can listen and provide understanding to students is imperative. “Even the process to just be able to talk about it in a supportive environment is very beneficial and validating for students,” she said. “It’s very stigmatized to talk about having a diagnosis in society in general, especially because chronic illnesses are often invisible. So, I’ve heard many students say things like, even if they’re talking to their roommate about it, there’s not really an understanding. Our office can help be a place of support … that they can talk to about what they’re going through.” Roland has struggled with disordered eating and anxiety in the past, and growing up, her mom went through mental health counseling. She said these personal experiences help her to be empathetic toward students dealing with their own struggles. Carter also attends a support group for Crohn’s and colitis patients. The group is called the CCFA support group, which stands for Crohn’s and Colitis Foundation. The group meets monthly at the American Cancer Society. She said she has a different reaction to the support group than others do. While she finds being surrounded by others going through similar tribulations comforting, it also reminds her of how much worse her Crohn’s could be. “They really helped me and were supportive and helped me understand things like my test results, but I’m weird, I feel guilty,” she said. “I can’t complain to people who are sicker than me.” Debra Weiss, a licensed mental health counselor at the University of Florida Counseling and Wellness Center, said it is normal to experience guilt.
“(Guilt is) a very common reaction in a competitive university structure,” she said. “We are set up to compare ourselves to others and in turn invalidate our own experience.” Weiss and graduate student Sarah Teitelbaum started a support group called Coping with Medical Challenges at the UF Counseling and Wellness Center in 2015. The group meets weekly and focuses on coping skills and a mindbody connection. Tending to emotional and mental wellness while coping with chronic illness is critical, she said. Members of the group all have different timelines; some have just been diagnosed and others have been living with their illness for 10 years. Having a spectrum of experiences is helpful for everyone in the group and can often lead to advice and reminders among group members. “My hope is (the group) provides a space where it feels like you’re in a room with people who get it, who can understand the struggle, who can understand how it feels to have people in your social circle that may not get what you’re going through and how it can affect your mood and energy,” Weiss said. Finding others who are going through the same struggles as you is important when living with a chronic illness. For Claudia Hall, coping is holding on to her independence while still relying on others in her life, like Reggie. Carter relies on the empathetic people in her life and resources like the DRC and the CCFA support group. Adjusting to life with an autoimmune disease looks different for everyone; it is often a journey of finding supportive people and focusing on healing mental health.
When I was 15, I was diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis (RA). Three years later, I was diagnosed with a second autoimmune disease, ulcerative colitis. My mom, Kathy Cusmano, was diagnosed with RA at age 47, six months before I was diagnosed. Sharing an illness with my mom has given me someone who understands. After she was diagnosed, my mom said she retreated to the couch and sulked. She remembers being in denial, even though deep down she knew the diagnosis was correct. About six months later, my mom recalls me noticing that my knuckles were swollen, a symptom of RA. From there, she said, it was every parent’s nightmare. “I felt helpless. You want to help your child, you want to take away any pain, and I knew the pain you were going through,” she said. “I felt so bad that I had moped around and hadn’t been a good example. But, then I snapped out of it and was in mother mode; no more moping for me.” My mom was someone in my own home who I could relate to. She understood the frustration of my fingers being so stiff in the mornings that I couldn’t hold a glass of orange juice at breakfast. When I asked my mom to describe how our motherdaughter relationship altered our experiences after diagnoses, she said, “We have something, this understanding between us, empathy that no one else has.” Orange & Blue 17
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Photo by Elise Engle
Relationships Friends
Finding Forgiveness in a
Sour Friend
BY Ariana Brasman PHOTOGRAPHY BY Elise Engle
My 10th-grade best friend and I used to be inseparable. We would watch our favorite movie, Titanic, recite every line from it and then spend hours gossiping about our celebrity crushes and reading J-14 magazine. She was my shoulder to cry on and the person I went to when I needed a vent session. She was my best friend. Or so I thought. My father passed away unexpectedly when I was 16. I invited her to attend my dad’s memorial service, but she said her parents wouldn’t allow her to because they were going through a divorce. She said her parents didn’t want to put added pressure on her because she already was having a hard time coping. A few days later, I found out she was going on a camping trip the weekend of the memorial service. Not only did she lie to me, but she lied during a time when I needed her the most. In any friendship, trust is the key ingredient. Throughout our lifespan, we develop almost 400 friendships, but only one in five of those relationships are with close friends, according to Robin Yapp, the author of “Friends Who Last a Lifetime.” Best friends are the definition of honesty, dependability, loyalty and support. When those qualities are broken, finding forgiveness can be tough. When I confronted her, she said she made up the excuse about her parents because she worried that if she had been honest, I’d be mad at her for caring more about the camping trip than me. Unfortunately, her deceit broke the trust we built with one another, and we stopped talking. Fast-forward five years. I was at a yogurt shop in my hometown, and when I went
to pay I saw she was the cashier. We hadn’t seen each other since sophomore year of high school. Given it had been five years, I realized holding a grudge over something that happened so long ago only caused me pain and heartache. Choosing to forgive is a gift you give to yourself by making the decision to stop anger from controlling your life and defining who you are. If you find yourself holding onto a grudge, the best way to heal is to let the negativity go, find the positive in this sour situation and ultimately forgive the individual(s), according to Therese J. Borchard, who wrote “8 Tips to Stop Holding a Grudge.” “Choose to create your own healing, with or without an apology,” Borchard wrote. The longer the grudge is held, the harder it becomes to find forgiveness and move
forward. Holding a grudge for even a few days can start affecting a person’s mental and physical health negatively. So, the sooner the grudge can be resolved, the better. It was then that I decided to tell her it’s in the past and it’s time we let things go, and she said she felt relieved. Letting go of the anger felt like a huge weight lifted off our shoulders. We spoke for the next half-hour, clearing the air, and it felt refreshing and rejuvenating. The bitterness between us was finally gone. “Forgiveness is something that you do for yourself, not for the other person,” Shaylini Somani wrote in "The Healing Power of Forgiveness and Letting Go.” Although our friendship will never be what it once was, I take pride in knowing that we’re no longer enemies. With enough time I was able to heal, find peace with my past and seek forgiveness in a longtime friend.
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Relationships Pets
the companionship
OF Dogs Coming home after a long day to that wagging tail and smiling face from your dog is the greatest feeling in the world. Dogs can be companions, best friends and the most loyal creatures you ever come into contact with, which is why so many people choose to have pets of their own. "According to the American Veterinary Medical Association, approximately 40 percent of U.S. households own dogs," said Amanda Stiles, a veterinarian at Suburban Animal Hospital in Gainesville.
A large percentage of her clients are college students.
Stiles said she loves how dogs are loyal companions who provide unconditional love. She has been a veterinarian for two years and grew up with a variety of animals like dogs, hamsters, rabbits, cats and birds. In connection to your personal health, Stiles said that walking and playing with your dog is a great source of exercise.
BY Ariana Brasman PHOTOGRAPHY BY Elise Engle
Dog owners have a decreased risk of cardiovascular disease as well as lower cholesterol and triglyceride levels because of an increase in exercise, she said. Dogs can offer companionship, love, entertainment and a sense of responsibility and purpose. “They do not judge what their owners do and are there for them as a friend no matter what, which can be great for people who have any type of anxiety,” she said. Even for people who don’t have anxiety, animals can be a daily stress reliever, she explained. For Chelsea Bojewski, her 2-year-old Pitbull mix, Wyatt, is like therapy for her. Bojewski, a 23-year-old University of Florida biology major, explained since she lives alone, Wyatt helps keep her calm and minimizes the sound of silence in the apartment. “He has reduced a lot of my anxiety,” she said. “When I’m having a bad day, he is always there by my side to make me feel better.” Bojewski said her favorite part of having a dog is the endless amounts of cuddles she receives from him on a daily basis. “He is honestly like a person,” she said. “He is just so affectionate, loving and smart.”
CATHERINE JEREZ AND CLINTON ELAM
Clinton had a stomach virus one day and he went into the bathroom to throw up. Tinsel walked in and placed her paw on his shoulder while he was hunched over the toilet, checking to see if he was feeling alright. 20 Orange & Blue
Owning a dog of your own makes you realize what it takes to care for another living thing because it’s like having your own child, she said. Having a dog helps you with time management, prioritizing and learning responsibilities. Catherine Jerez and Clinton Elam recently adopted their first dog together. The
couple, both alumni from the University of South Florida, adopted a 1-year-old lab and golden retriever mix named Tinsel. “I feel like a mother,” Jerez said. “I have to see her happy or I’ll worry.” Having Tinsel has brought excitement into both of their lives. Jerez, 24, said she gets excited to drive home from work knowing she will have Tinsel to greet her when she walks through the door. From time to time, Jerez suffers from minor depression and anxiety. Since adopting Tinsel she said she feels like the depression has lessoned, her anxiety has calmed down and she is happier in general. “Having a dog has improved my health overall,” Jerez said. “Mentally, I feel more relaxed.” Clinton Elam explained that making his girlfriend happy is key. “The biggest thing is that she makes Catherine so much happier, and that’s my goal, to make Catherine happy,” he said. “She brings us closer together and brings a ton of life into the house.” Michael Barrett wanted a golden retriever puppy since he was a little boy. Last March, Barrett, a UF aerospace engineering senior, turned his dream into a reality. He adopted Simba with his girlfriend a little over a year ago. They got him when he was eight weeks old, weighing in at 14 pounds. A year later, Simba, who is now 1, weighs 80 pounds. Simba is Barrett’s favorite companion“I consider him to be my best friend,” Barrett said. Simba is Barrett’s bundle of joy, and the unconditional love Barrett receives from Simba is what he treasures the most about him. “Simba is always there to cheer me up no matter what is going on in my life at the time,” he said. With Barrett doing most of the puppy training with Simba, the bond they built up has become unbreakable. He said that Simba has brought so much happiness into their lives. Dogs bring sunshine into your life even during your darkest days. Michael’s relationship with Simba is one of a kind, just like Chelsea and Wyatt’s and Catherine, Clinton and Tinsel’s. Every human-dog relationship is different, but one thing that is certain is the loyalty, companionship and unconditional love that dogs will always give to you.
dog days CHELSEA BOJEWSKI This story is when Chelsea realized Wyatt was just like a person. Her boyfriend, Zac, and Wyatt were play wrestling with each other when they stopped and stared at one other. Then suddenly Zac burped in Wyatt’s face. Wyatt looked at Zac and burped right back.
LI STALDER Poppy used to catch crickets, eat them and then just leave them in the house. Often times Li or her family would find dead crickets laying around the house.
ARIANA BRASMAN When Simba was a puppy, he managed to sneak into my backpack when I wasn't looking and steal my pink pen. When I came home, I saw a guilty face and a huge left paw covered in pink. Simba ate the pen and managed to eat all of the pink ink from it. He thought he got away with it, but we knew because he had pink all over his paw and nose. Orange & Blue 21
" having different traits could result in a satisfying relationship as long as those involved perceive themselves as similar." 22 Orange & Blue
Relationships Attract
Do Opposites Really QUESTIONING THE LINK BETWEEN PERSONALITY SIMILARITY AND RELATIONSHIP SATISFACTION
BY diana Illingworth PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze “Opposites attract” is one of the oldest and most universal dating clichés. Whether by people searching for spice and challenge in a relationship or those giving their friends an excuse to pursue that seemingly inexplicable crush on somebody who appears completely different from them, this phrase has been repeated for generations, unquestioned by many. But although opposites attract and likes repel are facts of magnetism, we rarely, if ever, hear the latter in reference to friendships or romantic relationships. This sort of implies that, even if opposites attract, it’s not an absolute truth, for in many cases, equals attract as well. Who hasn’t witnessed friends’ excitement upon finding out how much they have in common with somebody they’ve recently met? Now, if both opposites attract and likes attract can be true, which one is more dominant? Well, it’s complicated. A 2014 study by psychologists Nathan Hudson and R. Chris Fraley found that relationship satisfaction in 174 couples was not so much associated with trait similarity as it was associated with each partner’s perception of similarity. In other words, having similar traits doesn’t necessarily mean a relationship will be satisfying, and having different traits could result in a satisfying
relationship as long as those involved perceive themselves as similar. However, examining the correlation between relationship satisfaction and partner similarity — or dissimilarity — has limitations. First, as noted by the researchers, the number of ways in which people can differ from one another is potentially infinite. Differences can lie within demographic factors such as age, race and ethnicity, personality traits, attitudes and interests, and other ambits. Thus, saying opposites attract upon seeing a blond-brunette couple or an interracial couple does not have the same implications as saying it in reference to a liberal-conservative couple. The first couple might differ in appearance and have similar personalities, while the second might look similar but have distinct core beliefs. To simplify the matter, Hudson and Fraley looked at psychology’s big five personality traits, asking participants to rate themselves and their partners on extraversion, agreeableness, conscientiousness, emotional stability (the opposite of neuroticism) and openness to experience. Partners who were similar in terms of agreeableness and moderately similar in emotional stability were more satisfied in their
relationships. By contrast, sharing extraversion, conscientiousness and openness did not predict relationship satisfaction. Moreover, even when differences play a role in initial attraction, they don’t necessarily guarantee partners will stay together. We might be persuaded to think that introverts and extroverts, morning people and night people, risk-takers and security-seekers, and planners and impulsive people could work as couples because they would balance each other out, as if these opposite traits were, rather, complementary. However, discrepant core beliefs, such as those tied to religion or political orientation, might be harder to overlook. Hudson and Fraley allude to previous research that mentions those two characteristics among the ones many people seek to share with their romantic partners. So, do opposites attract? Yes and no. Differences add a spark to relationships, at least as long as we’re not painfully aware of them. But similarities are necessary. Nonetheless, relationships are complicated, and people are complex beings with evolving personalities and fluctuating levels of relationship satisfaction. So, the old saying remains a proposition for brave lovers to explore.
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Relationships Money
Tips to strengthen Your
Relationship with youR money BY Aileen Mack Money may come and go, but just like all relationships, your relationship with your money needs to be cherished and will require work. Study your money to find its role in your life and understand it on a deeper level. According to CareerTrends, the annual cost of living in the United States as a single adult with no children is $28,458; as a married couple with one child, $56,176; and as a married couple with four children, $82,871. Know why money is important so you don’t use it recklessly and cause irreparable damage. Here are some tips to strengthen that connection:
Respect it. Be clear about what you are trying to get out of this relationship. Money does not want to be squandered, wasted or taken for granted, said Michael Gutter, associate dean for Extension and state program leader for 4-H Youth Development, who taught personal finance classes before becoming an administrator. Money by itself is nothing, but the fact that it helps acquire resources and maintain a quality of life makes it meaningful. As time goes on, it will likely cost more money to maintain the current level of lifestyle satisfaction. Start saving for the future as young as possible and take advantage of compound interest, he said. The Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards has stated that about a third of lottery winners declare bankruptcy, according to Fortune Magazine. Stephanie Caudle of The Huffington Post wrote many lottery winners invest their earnings, without
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the guidance of a financial adviser, on bad projects and then have to pay to get out of that corner. The pressure of not blowing it all gets to be unbearable for some winners. Managing money is a part of respecting and being honest with it, Gutter said.
Develop patience. The world is full of amazing opportunities, including travel and the latest gadgets. However, patiently saving money until you can afford them is a good choice. Start putting a portion of your paycheck into a savings account and increase the percentage as time goes on. You will have built a good habit you can keep throughout your life. Know the difference between a want and a need. “Most things in life that are really worth it, that will mean a lot to us in the end, took patience to get,” Gutter said. “So impatience, if you will, is one of the most common mistakes people have – the notion that you really have to have it now.”
Be honest and transparent with it. We often lie to ourselves or exaggerate with money, thinking something costs less than it does and then justifying paying extra money for it when it turns out to be more, Gutter said. Keeping track of your money is part of being honest and planning correctly so you don’t accidentally spend more than you should. Use apps, such as Level Money and BillGuard, suggested by The New York Times, to help you in the process. Also, when you borrow money as a quick solution, you are essentially borrowing from your future, so it is very important to be honest with how much you will be able to pay back.
Get organized. Failure to keep track of your money could negatively affect the way you feel about it. People tend to make decisions spontaneously and then change their minds, so lack of organization hurts your relationship with your money. Make a budget and set clear financial goals, but keep in mind they might change.
Relationships Goals
#RelationshipGoals
COUPLES SHARE KEY INGREDIENTS TO LONG-LASTING RELATIONSHIPS
BY Ariana Brasman PHOTOGRAPHY BY Elise Engle
YOEL LAPSCHER AND GIRLFRIEND SAMANTHA STREITMAN HAVE BEEN DATING ALMOST THREE YEARS.
To celebrate their second year of dating, Ashley Reynolds and Chris Cerjan spent their anniversary in the same place where they shared their first kiss and had their first official date. Cerjan, a 22-yearold University of Florida student earning his master's in international business, took his longtime girlfriend to Savannah, Georgia, last March. After touring the town, they went to Tybee Island, where Cerjan wanted to give Reynolds a meaningful gift. He gave her a lavalier, which is a necklace engraved with his fraternity letters on it.
In Greek life, it’s considered a historic thing, Reynolds explained. The lavaliere represents that Cerjan is placing Reynolds above his fraternity. In other words, the lavaliere symbolizes that she is the most important thing in his life. According to Caitlin DeLuca, who wrote “Bringing Back Greek Traditions: Lavalier Edition,” a lavalier is a sign of a long-term commitment and can even be considered a pre-engagement occurrence. The necklace is a sign that the couple is so devoted to one another
that they will probably end up getting married. In Reynolds and Cerjan’s case, this turned out to be true. This March, after three years of dating, Cerjan proposed to Reynolds, and she said, “Yes!” Now as a graduating senior, her dream has come true. “My expectation was, 'I’m going to come to college and find my husband since my parents were high school sweethearts,'” Reynolds said.
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ASHLEY REYNOLDS AND CHRIS CERJAN JUST GOT ENGAGED.
However, Reynolds, a 21-year-old UF elementary education major, said she expected it would take a little longer to find the one. She met Cerjan during her freshman year at UF. They originally met during a Christmas party function that Cerjan’s fraternity was throwing. Reynolds got invited to attend by another brother in Cerjan’s fraternity, and Cerjan was there with a different girl. After some time of getting to know each other, Cerjan asked Reynolds to join him on his formal weekend in Savannah, Georgia. While in Savannah, they both realized how much they liked one another, and they decided to pursue each other.
useful for them. Reynolds said Cerjan’s love language is words of affirmation, meaning he likes to be reaffirmed that she cares. Her love language is acts of service. So, if Cerjan is having a bad day, anything Reynolds does to help make her day a little less stressful is her favorite thing. Reynolds explained that Cerjan has so many wonderful traits, but she truly loves his sense of humor and how he is always willing to try new things.
The key ingredients to making a relationship work are compromise, communication and using each other’s love languages, Reynolds said. There are five love languages, which are ways people express and experience love. They are: physical touch, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service and words of affirmation, according to Gary Chapman, who wrote the book “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate.”
Victor Harris, an assistant professor and extension specialist in the Department of Family, Youth and Community Sciences at UF said that the foundation of any solid relationship or marriage starts with friendship.
Both Reynolds and Cerjan took the five love languages quiz at 5lovelanguages. com at the start of their relationship. Taking the quiz started as a joke, but it turned into a tool that proved to be
Harris explained that marriage relationships often go through three stages. He’s been married to his wife for 33 years, so he can speak from both expertise and experience. The first stage
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“He has such a big heart and is just willing to go above and beyond to do anything that he possibly can to make me happy,” she said. “He’s an angel. I love him.”
“If your relationship is going to stay together, you have to become good friends and you have to know how to maintain that friendship even when you make mistakes,” Harris said.
is the romantic stage when you want to be around your significant other all the time. The romantic stage is followed by the disillusionment and distraction stage. Disillusion is when you realize your significant other is not as perfect as you thought and has some flaws. Distractions can come from personal interests, work or kids. In this stage, you’re giving your friendship away to all these other distractions and have to be careful, Harris, who has three kids, explained. Often, your friendship with your significant other stops being nurtured during this second stage. The third stage in marriage is called dissolve (to end the marriage), resignation (resigned to the fact that you’re not getting a divorce, however you’re also not happy) or acquiring new skills so you can experience some degree of contentment. This stage follows the principle of trying to do the right thing for the right reason. It’s all about a person’s character. So, instead of focusing on your anger, you focus on how to resolve it. “I believe in principle-centered relationships,” Harris said. “If you teach people the right principles, then you can let them govern themselves.” Another important principle that Harris believes helps make relationships thrive
is knowing how to manage expectations. For example, if you’re going to be late, make sure you call first. One of the issues with expectations in relationships is people don’t say what they want. They just assume their partner knows, or that they should know, Harris said. “So much of the unhappiness in relationships occurs because there’s unfulfilled expectations,” he said.“Two of the most important factors for couples that are happy is that they make decisions together, and they have a system set up of appreciation, respect and admiration.” He referred to it as having an emotional bank account. When the interest and excitement in a relationship starts to die down you see a higher risk for separation or divorce. In today’s society, we are in high self-actualization mode and expect much more from our partners than we did in the past. “They just let their friendship wither and quit investing,” he said. “We expect a social, emotional, physical, intellectual and spiritual connection nowadays.” Yoel Lapscher, a 22-year-old working toward a master's in information systems at UF, has been with his girlfriend, Samantha Streitman, a 21-year-old UF industrial and systems engineering major, for almost three years. When it comes to the key ingredients to making a relationship work, Lapscher said, compromise is number one. Trust and honesty are also essential factors. “Love is being there and knowing that you can trust them, that you can be honest with them,” he said.
when it’s emotionally driven, the fix isn’t always quick and easy. “We do have beautiful moments, but love is also about those tough moments, which are not featured in films,” he said. When an issue surfaces, it’s about patience, time and understanding where one another is coming from and then focusing on the solution, Lapscher said. “We’ve never experienced a problem where it’s just unsolvable,” he said. Lisa and Ed Morales have been married for 15 years. With two daughters aged 8 and 9, both homeschooled, they have their hands full. Lisa, who was born and raised in Gainesville, and Ed, who moved to Gainesville in 1978, met back in 1994 at Kentucky Fried Chicken. Ed was on a limited diet at the time, so he would treat himself once a week to Kentucky Fried Chicken. He went in to order at a different location one day, and he saw Lisa working behind the counter. They just hit it off from there. The Morales both said making a marriage successful involves patience, communicating and having a good sense of humor. Lisa said that she couldn’t have found anyone who is more perfect for her. “He makes me laugh, and he is kind,” she said. “When I’m unhappy, he is always supportive.” Ed said that he feels good
just being in his wife’s presence, and when she is not around, he misses her. “When I’m at work, I’m always thinking about her.” When they argue about something, they will walk away to calm down and then talk rationally about it later on.“When you engage another person when they are mad, all you do is make the situation worse,” Ed said. “You’re not going to resolve it. You’re just going to ramp up and say things you don’t mean.” One of the biggest challenges they have faced is Ed’s work schedule, which has caused him to miss out on important holidays like Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve/Day and New Year’s Eve. They try to compromise by celebrating those special holidays a few days before the actual day, so Ed can be a part of it. This past New Year’s Eve, Ed called Lisa on the phone while at work to watch the ball drop. Since they couldn’t spend it together in person, they tried to communicate the best way they could. “I let go of the idea that you have to have Christmas on Christmas day,” she said. “It’s OK to have it the day before or day after.” Ed said it really helps if you’re not only lovers and companions, but friends. To Ed, Lisa is his best friend and to Lisa, Ed is hers. “Marriage is serious,” he said. “It’s a commitment, and once you make it, stick with it.”
Lapscher’s girlfriend, Streitman, pointed out the importance of being able to maintain your own life outside of your relationship. Being able to do your own thing, have your own hobbies and socialize with your friends while still being able to share those things afterward with one another is essential, Streitman said. “I think it’s important to have some space in a relationship,” she said. Growing independently is an important component for their relationship. One quality Streitman admires about Lapscher is his drive. “He knows what he wants, and he is not afraid to go after that,” she said. Meanwhile, Lapscher said he admires Streitman's work ethic. “She is very organized and action-driven,” he said. When there is a problem, Lapscher wants to fix it right away, he said. However,
LISA AND ED MORLAES HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 15 YEARS.
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Relationships Past
An uncommon Past HOW I RECONNECTED WITH NINE GIRLS FROM MY ORPHANAGE
BY Li Stalder My parents began the adoption process to bring me home before I was even born. In 1994, my dad took a sabbatical to study Chinese history, culture and language at Guangxi University in Nanning, China. While my parents were there, they volunteered alongside members of a university Christian society at a local orphanage, which had very few caregivers. They would simply hold babies to give them the love they weren’t receiving. That’s when my parents knew they wanted to adopt, but they had to go back to the United States to start the process. After a year and a half of sending paperwork back and forth, my parents finally received a small black-and-white photo of a 4-month-old baby. And for three more months, my mom would pray the rosary each night to keep me safe until they could travel to meet me. On one cold winter day in Nanchang, Jiangxi, 12 babies swaddled in layers of clothing and one 8-year-old met their new parents and siblings for the first time. Everyone was full of joyful tears and pure love as all 13 families united. After almost two years of waiting, my parents finally held me in their arms. When my parents came to get me, they weren’t bringing me home alone. They traveled in a group with these 12 other families, as part of Holt International Children’s Services, the adoption agency my parents worked with. Because of the unique beginning the families shared, the parents stayed in touch by swapping Christmas and birthday photos over the next few years.
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LI + BEKA
As I was growing more curious about my past when I was about 9, my parents showed me a list of contact information from 1997 for each of the families. I knew I should try to reach out, even if some of the information had a chance of being outdated. Once I mailed off my first batch of letters, I didn't hear back from four of them. But I gained nine new pen pals and reconnected with girls I had shared the first six months of life with. We exchanged school photos, fun facts about ourselves and our hopes and dreams. Pamela, who was one of the 12 infants and had been raised in Cleveland, wanted to be an NBA basketball player. Meanwhile, I wanted to be either an author, a professional photographer or a teacher. In 2005, my dad helped me create my first email address and
an online Yahoo! group for us girls to connect. The internet was revolutionary. Instead of being limited to one-on-one letter writing, we could send mass-email chains to each other. I ended up recruiting six or seven to our group, which was appropriately named “NanchangKids96.” At the time, my family and I were still living in southern California. But in the summer of 2006, I had a spot in a national Dance America competition at Disney World in Orlando, Florida. One of the girls, Beka, lived in the outskirts. We excitedly made plans to meet, which included a list of “Must Do’s at Disney.” Once in Orlando, our families met in Downtown Disney and ate at CiCi’s Pizza during that first night.
PHOTO COURTESY OF THE STALDER FAMILY
Baby Li
Thoughts from Other Adoptees
PAMELA & LI
BEKA & LI
The reunion was surreal. After the initial nervousness, I remember Beka and I got along like old pals who hadn’t seen each other in a while. The trip only lasted a week, and we had to say our goodbyes. But little did we know that a year later we would move to Tampa.
sleepovers or birthday parties at Tampa Bay Rays baseball games. When I was finally allowed to create a Facebook account in 2010, I “friended” the nine girls I had remained in touch with. We kept up with major updates in our lives, asked how our summers were going and chatted when we felt like it.
When we moved across the country, we tackled an unorthodox route. We traveled from San Diego County to Portland, Oregon, so we could attend my older sister’s wedding. But then we headed straight across the Midwest and stopped in Cleveland to visit Pamela and her family. Once again, it was just like old friends hanging out. We rode bicycles to the local library down the street and walked along the shoreline of Lake Erie before we had to move along. Since moving to Florida, I’ve had opportunities to meet with Beka for
Adoption can be tough to process for anyone. While growing up, being able to connect with the other girls normalized the situation and made me feel like part of a special club. We shared a common background. I didn’t feel different. As busy young women now, we don’t talk as much as we used to. We’ve all grown up and are about to graduate from college and move on to different things. But the narrative of our uncommon past will always remain.
“It’s so beautiful and so honoring to know I’ve been with these girls before we knew we were going to be adopted, before we knew we would have futures and before we knew our families and friends who’ve loved us ever since. Even though we’re all in different parts of America, we all have the same beginning story, and I’m so grateful to know I was not alone during that time.” – Pamela Force “I think it's really cool how we're all connected through this one thing.” – Jamie Olson “I think the connection we all have is amazing. I’m glad I got to reconnect with everyone on Facebook. It’s awesome to find and connect with people that were in my orphanage.” – Rebekah Wheeler
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Relationships Time
Alone time is the best Time BY Mary Kate Cobb PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze
I feel like there is a stigma when it comes to doing things alone. Whether it be staying in or going to the movies by myself, spending quality time with me is my favorite pastime. Taking personal time is vital whether single or in a relationship. I grew up as the youngest of six siblings, so any quiet time I could get as a child was cherished. To this day, there is still nothing better to me than being home by myself, hanging out with my cat and watching a movie on the couch. More than 27 million people live alone, according to 2013 census data. As a society, we’re living longer, marrying later and, in my opinion, enjoying our spurts of “me” time. I prefer to do the latter without my phone. Through social media, when we’re alone, we’re not
really alone. Americans spend an average of 4.7 hours interacting with their phones each day, according to Digital Trends. Constantly connected through Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, heck even LinkedIn, we receive frequent updates of what our friends are doing when we’re not with them. Aside from providing an opportunity to detox from technology, “me” time is good for the body and mind. According the Huffington Post, spending quality time alone can reduce our anxiety and help our creative juices flow. If you’re ever stuck with a project you can’t seem to finish or stressed out about life in general, consider these foolproof ways to spend time alone.
1. Movies
2. Exercising
Going out to the movies never fails me. The popcorn and drinks make it my No. 1 choice, and even though many people go in groups, it’s a place where you don’t need company. There is literally no talking to another human for at least an hour and a half. Plus, the film entertains you and helps you get your mind off wwyour problems.
People define exercising differently. For some it means taking a leisurely stroll, but to others it’s about going to the gym until they feel like they might pass out. Either way, physical activity will make you feel healthy and spark your creativity.
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3. Go Eat
4. Stay In
Going out to eat by myself is one of my favorite things. Bring a book, have a nice talk with your waiter and enjoy your own company. This is the perfect opportunity to visit that restaurant your friends or significant other don’t want to go to.
You can create your own little ritual for the nights when you choose to stay home. For me, a night in calls for a face mask and a chick flick. My current favorite, which I’ve seen five times, is “How to Be Single.” Also, a bath is my personal recipe for relaxation. I promise it works.
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Relationships Parasocial
Intimacy from Afar: The plusses & Perils of Parasocial Relationships BY CHLOE STRADINGER
“I think he made a terrible decision for himself,” Aubrey Logan says, shaking her head as “The Bachelor” contestant proposes to his now-fiancé on the show’s season finale. Over a plate of chocolate chip cookies, Logan discusses why bachelor Nick Viall won’t be happy with winner Vanessa Grimaldi. “All of the girls that he’s gone after have been similar, and I just feel like he needed someone different than Vanessa,” she said. Logan and a few of her friends, gathered around a bottle of wine in her apartment to watch the fateful finale, scrutinize his choice. They speak about his engagement with the same rhetoric they might use while gossiping about a close friend’s dramatic love life. “I cried at 'The Women Tell All' episode.”
Listening in on this conversation, it’s easy to assume these girls went to school with Viall or at least know him as a friend of a friend. In reality, they’ve never met him. Instead, they’ve followed his TV-documented quest for love on “The Bachelorette,” “Bachelor in Paradise” and, finally, “The Bachelor.” Still, they empathize with his past and debate which woman will be best for his future as if they truly understand him. After emotionally investing themselves in his love life for four TV seasons, in a way, they do know him. Not all relationships are two-sided. Logan and her friends were participating in what sociologists call a parasocial relationship. They felt intimately connected to Viall, a media personality, though they’ve only seen him through a screen and he can’t reciprocate the friendship.
Logan explains how Viall always looks past the nice, calm woman who could make him laugh to be with the beautiful, controlling woman who would drag him around.
Like all relationships, the parasocial variety exists on spectrums of casual to serious and healthy to unhealthy. Many of these relationships are not dramatic or even very apparent to the participant. Logan admitted she loves following reality TV stars, but because this does not interfere with her ability to connect with friends in real life, it’s entirely healthy. Research shows that feeling an intimate connection with a celebrity is actually quite common.
“That’s why it hasn’t worked out for him, ever!” Jenna Esposito exclaimed in agreement.
In a 2001 study titled “Admirer-Celebrity Relationships Among Young Adults,” 213 young adults responded to a survey about
“They’re going to make cute babies.” “True love isn’t real or else he wouldn’t have chosen her.”
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their feelings of attachment to “media figures they identified as idols in their lives.” Over 90 percent of respondents indicated they had been “attracted to a celebrity idol at some point in their lives.” It’s likely that you have engaged in some sort of parasocial relationship, even in a lighthearted sense of the term. Do you tune into Ellen DeGeneres’ show every day, happy to see her hilarious dance moves and hear from her heartwarming guests? Maybe you follow all things Tim Tebow and feel emotionally tied to his victories and losses in athletics and in life. Perhaps you follow Kanye West on social media and take his music as gospel. Just as real-life relationships develop when people spend time together, parasocial relationships develop when a person spends significant time watching or following a media personality. Parasocial interactions are not new to the internet age, but the internet does make it easier to spend more time “with” a media personality than ever before. University of Florida Professor Robert H. Wells II, who teaches the TV & American Society course, explores this relationship phenomenon in his class. “Modern media, like social media and reality TV, have conceivably increased the potential intensity of a parasocial relationship by allowing people to have often constant and unprecedented access to even the most mundane aspects of a
media personality’s life,” Wells wrote in an email interview. Technology allows us to experience moments with famous people with whom we would never interact in real life. You can watch Chrissy Teigen’s baby say “cat” for the first time on Instagram or check out the açai bowl Gigi Hadid ate for breakfast on Snapchat. Jessica Brewer, a UF senior, follows several members of the Kardashian family on Instagram. She also follows Kendall and Kylie Jenner on Snapchat, where their “stories” are nestled among those of her real-life friends. “The other day Kylie came out with a new Velvet Lip Kit,” Brewer said. “I have, like, ten thousand lipsticks, but I had to buy hers because she kept Snapchatting it, and she looked so cute.” Her attraction to the family started after a mouth surgery that confined her to the couch for two weeks over winter break. Unable to talk or do much of anything else, she binge-watched nine seasons of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” on Hulu.
Dr. Tina Tannen of UF’s Counseling and Wellness Center said parasocial relationships can begin when people have trouble engaging in social relationships in real life. In Brewer’s case, her short-term impairment propelled the relationship. While these relationships may be perceived as “fake” to outsiders, studies show they’re very real to people who engage in them. They can also have important benefits similar to relationships in real life. A 2008 study by two researchers in the Department of Psychology at the University at Buffalo, SUNY found that parasocial relationships can be especially beneficial to people with low self-esteem. There is less fear of rejection than in a face-to-face interaction. Plus, many people choose celebrity idols based on ideal versions of themselves, so engaging in these relationships gets them closer to their goals. Perhaps most importantly, parasocial relationships can fulfill a person’s desire to belong. “That’s a fundamental need,” Dr. Tannen said.
In extreme circumstances, however, parasocial relationships can become unhealthy. A 2002 study titled “Media Violence and the Public Revisited” points to kids learning violent behavior from their TV idols. TV can also incite unrealistic relationship goals. These relationships can become harmful if they become obsessive and interfere with how a person engages in the real world. Dr. Tannen said signs of this would be similar to signs of addiction, including withdrawing from friends in real life and being unable to talk about anything but the media personality. Her suggestion for making sure a parasocial relationship does not cross into the danger zone is to practice mindfulness. “It helps people slow down, be present and be able to connect in the real world,” she said. That same University at Buffalo research showed that people don’t have to choose between parasocial and real life relationships – in fact, they’re believed to be complementary.
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Relationship
Advice
Guys can give advice, Too - But is it any good? WE ASKED GUYS TO GIVE US THEIR BEST DATING ADVICE. SOME IMPRESSED — OTHERS, WELL, SEE FOR YOURSELF
BY Elise Engle Like just about anything else, dating is competitive. According to the United States Census Bureau, there were 109 million unmarried people 18 years of age and older in America in 2015. If you fall into that crowd of 109 million singles, you’re probably looking for ways to stand out, while also simultaneously searching for someone who stands out to you, too. There certainly are plenty of fish in the sea, but that can become more of a burden than a blessing if you don’t know what you’re doing. Often, it seems as if women are the ones giving and receiving relationship advice – a stereotype perpetuated by popular magazine covers plastered with phrases like “152 Steps to Landing Your Dream Man!” and “297 Little Things You’re Doing Your Boyfriend Hates.” However, guys also have their fair share of knowledge in their dating and relationship toolboxes. We asked guys to give us some of their “best” advice, and, occasionally, compared their ideas to those of the “experts” to see how they match up.
“Never do all your talking via text.” – John
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What the experts say: With texting, less is definitely more. Although it’s a great dating tool, texting should never be a replacement for actually talking. (The Manual by Steve Santagati)
“Wait as long as you can before you poop or fart in front of your girlfriend. Once you do it once, she'll feel free to do it whenever.” – Chris
“Don't get into a fight with your significant other in front of a large group of friends. It will end poorly, and you'll most likely be labeled as the bad guy.” – Stefan What the experts say: Getting into fights is often a sign that your relationship is on the outs. However, fights shouldn’t always be a big deal – it’s all about the way you resolve it. (The Manual by Steve Santagati)
“Over time, small traits and characteristics that seemed like minor annoying quirks at first will start to become exasperating, e.g. vocal fry or a weird speaking habit. Remember that nobody is perfect and work with them and express your feelings so that a small annoyance doesn't eventually make you resent them.” – Hayden
“Don't date just for looks. I know it's cliché, but it couldn't be more true. I've gone on dates with girls who couldn't hold a semi-intelligent conversation for more than 10 seconds, and it made me want to rip my hair out.” – Pedro What the experts say: After studying data from 10,000 speed daters, University of Pennsylvania psychologists say that most people decide how attracted they are to another person only three seconds after meeting them. (The Manual by Steve Santagati)
“Make sure to always wear pants on dates.” – Anonymous
“I guess I've always heard and abided by just being polite and respectful.” – Alejandro
“Always keep doing the little things that made you fall in love.” – Neil What the experts say: You have to continue putting in the work to make your relationship great, and occasionally revisit what you both want to see if those things have changed. (“Expert Reveals How To Stop a Rut In Your Relationship From Turning Into A Breakup” by Candice Jalili for Elite Daily)
“Before entering a relationship, have a flexible list of what you want to provide in a relationship and what you'd like to receive. Take into consideration factors that you think need to be addressed early so you can better present them organically and not blindsiding your partner.” – John What the experts say: Although physical attraction is important, compatibility in other areas will always prevail. Know what you like and dislike and stick to it, or else you may lose yourself in the process of trying to please your partner. (Dating Advice for Women from Men: Tips and Stories from the Inside by Lance Steele)
“Do not get Mexican or Indian food on the first date. This is from personal experience.” – Zach
What the experts say: Try dating outside of your usual “type.” You may find that there are a lot more to people than the way they present themselves, and you could end up attracted to a “type” you never expected. (“9 Matchmakers Share Their Best Dating Advice for Singles” by Michelle Toglia for Bustle)
What the experts say: If you want to increase your chances of someone falling in love with you, choose an exciting location for your first date. (How to Date Men: Dating Secrets from America’s Top Matchmaker by Janis Spindel) “Focus on making the other person happy. If you're not happy when she/ he is happy then you have the wrong person.” – Scott
“Learn to cook. The old adage is that the way to man's heart is through his stomach. While true, it rings even truer for women. In fact, I'd even argue that a woman's heart IS her stomach, so learn to cook guys, and you'll always have a happy partner. Plus, it's a great and relatively inexpensive date for after you two know each other a little better.” – Connor
“I've only been in one relationship. It was in 8th grade. If I had any advice from then, I would say to definitely talk to the girl, instead of just texting her while sitting a seat away from her at lunch.” – Max
What the experts say: Don’t cook for someone at your home until the third date. (How to Date Men: Dating Secrets from America’s Top Matchmaker by Janis Spindel) “Don't expect your boyfriend/girlfriend to make your life complete. No one is perfect, and they're going to fail you eventually. Find someone who is worth working through those failures.” – Anonymous “This might seem obvious, but relationships are a lot easier than what we make them out to be. Always be honest with yourself and your partner. If something doesn't feel right, it is because you're not listening to what you truly need and what makes you happy. Learn to agree and see from the other person's point of view, but do not settle. Life is too short, and there is too much opportunity out there. Recognize your own worth in the relationship because otherwise how is your partner supposed to.” – Aaron
When it comes to the crazy world of dating and relationships, it never hurts to have a little insight from others. Whether you choose to utilize these tips or not, it’s safe to conclude that men can give some pretty helpful advice when they want to. However, the most important thing is to know is that every relationship is different. Not everything will work for everyone – and that’s OK. Finding the things that work for you is part of what makes dating fun. And also stressful. But, mostly, fun!
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Photo by Elise Engle
Culture People
People of Gainesville ABOUT 124,500 PEOPLE CALL GAINESVILLE THEIR HOME. THESE ARE A FEW OF THEIR STORIES.
BY Janine Wolf, Rebecca Rubin and Aileen Mack
Dwayne Fletcher: “I was the student government senator for some time, and there were a lot of times where I had to choose between doing what was in the best interest of the status quo versus actually standing up for what I believed in. And if people wanted me to go up and say something that really wasn’t true, I was able to say, ‘No,’ and denied different positions just because I am a firm believer in actually walking the walk and not just speaking it. My parents do have influence. They always taught me to definitely be a good person and to always be someone who you can depend on.”
Kimberly Harmount: “I was actually a dual-enrollment student back at my old school, so I would do like college and high school, so I got a taste of that junior and senior year of high school. I think it’s so much bigger here, and there’s so many students. You really have to fend for yourself, and you’re on your own. If you want to work hard, it’s on you to do it.”
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Jessica Dellorso: “My hubby and I got married in October, and we’ve been planning to have a puppy forever. We’ve been wanting one for a really long time, and over Christmas, we were figuring out the best time. So, my husband found a breeder outside of Orlando, and on Valentine’s Day gave me a cockapoo book — so a Cocker Spaniel and poodle mix — and had a little picture in it that said, ‘I can’t wait to meet you in a month!’ His name is Buckwheat!”
Kym Hodges: “I’m a labor doula and childbirth educator, so that’s what I’m really excited about. March is always known as international doula month, so I’m getting the word out and doing all sorts of activities around the fact that with a little bit of education, you can completely empower a woman. Birth is amazing empowerment.”
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Clint Christine: “Everyone says I’m a big kid. I go out and I play with the kids and run around. I have fun; I love life.”
Jasmine Crenshaw: “I used to be a child welfare case manager, so working with foster kids and just trying to make a difference in their lives. I work with a lot of teenagers. The most rewarding part was just helping them and just seeing them do well and feeling like maybe I had a part in that.”
Kiara Toney: “We’ve made a lot of progress since the Civil Rights Movement, but there’s still a lot of issues, not only domestically, but all over the world. It’s just kind of overwhelming with what we have to deal with and the problems that still exist for different people or ethnicities or sexualities. As a child, I never really had to think about all of our issues and struggles. I’m definitely more aware and knowledgeable about everything, I guess.”
Carlos A. SuÁrez: “The first time I went inside the Swamp, that was really cool. In terms of being here, the size of the campus. I used to work on a smaller campus. Those two things struck me initially. And then of course, and I don’t mind being quoted on this, seeing the little lizards. I grew up in the Caribbean, and I live in New England, and they had no little lizards. You call them lizards, right? Yeah, those struck me as being very cool.”
Joe Spillane: “When I was 18, I really had no idea how much there was to figure out. I was really not super smart at that point in my life. I look back on it and feel like, ‘You know, gosh, I could have taken advantage of a lot more than I did as an undergraduate.’ I think back to my classes and I’m like, ‘I don’t know why I didn’t pay more attention in these classes.’”
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Darran Jenkins: “Here in the United States of America, there’s a lot of freedom. There’s a lot of things you couldn’t do back in the days, so hopefully I can take that advantage. But in the meantime, I spend time with my kids and keep an open mind and enjoy my life.”
Alfred Chen: “I only got here this January as an exchange student. Everything is new to me, and I’m enjoying it. People are more outgoing here. I think that’s a big difference between Western and Eastern culture. Chinese people, they don’t open up their mind or their heart very often or to strangers. But people here, they are very outgoing. They like to share what they think. I like that. I heard Florida is a good place — sunshine, beaches, right?”
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Hannah Warshowsky: “Well, I’m 24, and I just got married on March 11. I’m Jewish, and I married a Muslim-Palestinian person, and we had a crazy combo wedding with Jewish traditions and Muslim traditions. It could have pissed everybody off, but I think people could see how authentic and caring we were for each other, and so we just did it how we wanted to do it and tried to encourage diversity.”
Mateo Van Thienen: “I was in my room upstairs, and I shouted. Then my mom was like, 'What happened?' and I ran down and was like, 'I got into UF!' But the thing is that I kind of had this perception from the movies that you get the mail and then you open it, but it was online, so I was checking like every one hour and maybe at like 1 a.m. — checking: 'Did I get in? Did I get in? Did I get in?' But then suddenly, yup, I got in!”
LaToynia Hicks: Mike Flinn: “I haven’t destroyed the bike yet. If I had my helmet on, that probably wouldn’t have happened. And I wouldn’t have this.”
“Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to be working with kids. I’ve been with the school board for over 20-something years. (I enjoy) hearing the different stories they have to tell you during the day to make you laugh and trying to put a smile on their face when they’re unhappy.”
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CULTURE attraction
GET THE LIFE YOU WANT WITH THE Law of attraction HOW TO ACCEPT WHAT THE UNIVERSE IS WILLING TO GIVE YOU
story and photo by DIANA ILLINGWORTH How does a troubled 20-year-old with anxiety and an opiates addiction become a psychology teacher, loving wife and mother and the boss of her own business within a decade? Some might say luck. Some would attribute it to the help of caring friends, and others would say through determination and hard work. But Andrea Schulman highlights a pivotal factor in her equation: the law of attraction. She remembers the moment everything changed. On winter break from her job as a high-school teacher about seven years ago, she was browsing Netflix when she found a film called, “The Secret,” in which scientists, philosophers and authors discuss how to obtain everything one has ever wanted, be it money, health, relationships, love, joy and more. This synopsis lured her because although she liked her job, she had been searching for something she felt was missing from her career and her life. The secret explained in the film is the law of attraction, a universal principle that governs how reality is constructed based on the premise that everything people experience results directly from their thoughts, feelings and expectations. In the movie, metaphysician Joe Vitale says we have attracted everything that currently surrounds us, knowingly or not. Every thought has a frequency, so if we constantly imagine a scenario,
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we consistently emit that frequency to the universe as a magnetic signal that draws that scenario to us, he says. Psychologist Denis Waitley says he worked on an experiment in which Olympic athletes were hooked up to sophisticated biofeedback equipment and asked to run their events only in their minds. Researchers observed that the same muscles fired in the same sequence when they were running the race in their minds as when they were running it on the track. The mind can’t distinguish between practice and reality, so if you can be somewhere with your mind, you can be there in reality, Waitley says. “When you visualize, you materialize." But the idea that whatever we believe possible and expect to obtain will surely come to us is questionable because if it were that simple, many of us would already be millionaires, work our dream jobs and have the most fulfilling relationships, right? Bob Doyle, an author featured in the film, explains the law of attraction does not discern between what people perceive as good or bad or work selectively to bring them only the good. It attracts the things they focus on with their thoughts and feelings, regardless of whether they’re things they want. The problem is, many times, worried people focus on what they don’t want and then wonder why it keeps showing
up. For example, somebody wanting to arrive at a meeting on time and repeating to himself, “I don’t want to be stuck in traffic,” is likely to attract just that: traffic. So, how can we keep track of the tens of thousands of thoughts we have each day to keep them optimistic? Being mindful of how those thoughts make us feel. “You’re getting exactly what you’re feeling about, not so much what you’re thinking about,” Doyle says. Fascinated with what she learned through “The Secret,” Schulman began researching the law of attraction and learning to manifest. In six months, she materialized moving into a better home after years of struggling to sell her old, devalued one during Florida’s housing crisis. She found a way to overcome her opiates addiction without becoming chemically dependent on substitutes. Since then, she has quit drugs, cigarettes and alcohol. She feels healthier and has mended formerly strained relationships with family members. Today, she coaches people through webinars and blog posts on her membership website, Raise Your Vibration Today, and through private sessions. Schulman believes we live in a field of infinite possibility, where anything we can imagine is potentially happening simultaneously. It’s like television. Hundreds of channels play a variety of shows at the same time, and we’re
able to watch the program we want by tuning the frequency of our television to the station playing it. The rest of the channels represent life’s alternative possibilities. But because life doesn’t come with a remote control, the way we tune into the reality we want is through our vibrational energy, which can be heightened or lowered by our emotions. When we envision ourselves in our ideal scenario, we picture ourselves happy, excited, relaxed and grateful. So, to attract said scenario, our mood in this reality should mimic our mood in that reality. In contrast, emotions like sadness, anger, envy, guilt and resentment emit negative frequencies – the infamous “bad vibes” – and attract more negativity. Thus, when we want something, we should feel as if we already have it rather than focus on how it feels to lack it, Schulman says. Many times, when people have a strong desire for something, their brain
fabricates a list of reasons why their goal is hard to reach or why they might not be prepared enough to achieve it yet. “I want to visit Australia, but I don’t have enough money,” or, “but my job is keeping me busy,” or, “but who will take care of my dog?” As soon as doubt and negativity kick in, it’s as if we’re telling the universe that we’re not ready to receive what it’s willing to grant, Schulman says. Most people don’t allow themselves to want things because they don’t know how they’re going to manifest, says Jack Canfield, an author featured in “The Secret.” However, a person could drive from California to New York in the dark with headlights that only reach 200 feet because all they need to be seeing at any given time to keep driving is the next 200 feet, he says. We don’t need
to know how everything will play out. Knowing what is in front of us and how to respond to it is enough. Schulman’s recommendation is to avoid the “I’m going to make this happen” mindset altogether. People should know that what they want is possible without trying to fill in the blanks of when, where and how they’ll make it happen, because that shows they don’t believe it can come on its own, she says. Author Lisa Nichols summarizes the process of manifesting in three simple steps: ask the universe for what you want, believe it’s already yours and then receive it. Everything we want, we desire because we believe it will bring us joy. But we shouldn’t forget we have the capacity to be happy starting now. Schulman’s advice: be happy first, then the rest will come to you.
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Culture
Volunteer
give back to your
community BY Li Stalder
Volunteering can be a powerful gift to your community. By giving back some of your time, you have the potential to make an impact, no matter how small an activity may seem. Whether you need community service hours or just want to lend a hand, check out these local opportunities based on your interests.
If you want to help animals find a new home: Gainesville Rabbit Rescue Gainesville Rabbit Rescue is the lone rescue of its kind between Atlanta and Orlando — helping rabbits (and the occasional guinea pig) since 1998. As long as there’s space, “we take in any rabbit, whether it’s healthy, sick, young, old” from across Florida, says Kathy Finelli, executive director. On average, there’s usually between 90 and 100 rabbits, including ones in foster homes. A converted horse barn serves as the central “bunny barn” facility in Williston, where you can clean cages and groom rabbits. Due to hard physical labor, the rescue prefers volunteers to be at least 16 years old. Have allergies? You can still help out with events, fundraising and advertising.
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If you want a new friend: Friends Across the Ages If you are at least 18 years old and looking for a long-term commitment, consider Friends Across the Ages' 12-week, one-on-one nursing home visitation program. At a set time and day each week, you’ll go in a small group that visits the same nursing home, where you’ll meet and talk with residents. Co-founder Allison Blay says it gives volunteers “a chance to form relationships they otherwise wouldn’t encounter.” Because the program puts in individual attention for each volunteer, the organization can only take a few at once. But individuals limited by time can attend a few special events each month, which are listed on its website.
If you want to cheer up a child who’s ill: Ronald McDonald House Charities’ Sweets and Treats & Visiting Chef programs Practice your culinary skills through the two most popular volunteer
programs. Small groups up to five or 10 people, including children, can either cook breakfast or dinner, or bake desserts for the families staying at the House. The House provides kitchen equipment, but you bring your own ingredients. A dinner should include 50 servings of proteins, vegetables, starches, desserts and drinks. Be sure to sign up with enough time in advance because spots fill up quickly. Vicki Baker, director of marketing and communications, says these programs provide positivity for families by doing little extra things during a time of negativity.
If you want to help fellow Gators in need of food: Field and Fork Pantry The Field and Fork Pantry opened its doors on the University of Florida campus in fall 2015 to students, faculty and staff who experience food insecurity. It’s also open during school breaks with an adjusted schedule, but not national holidays. While the resources are only for the UF community, anyone can volunteer in the pantry every Thursday from 2 to 5 p.m. During this time, you go through an inventory process that organizes and puts donations onto the shelves. Groups can hold food drive donations, which Stephanie Muench, who oversees volunteering and marketing, says has increased due to more awareness starting last fall.
CULTURE
Home
a tale of two homes BY Janine Wolf PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze I grew up in the German city of Nuremberg, which is marked by its unique blend of modern architecture and medieval infrastructure. As a European, I fell habit to the typical style of European living: walk everywhere; eat when convenient; picnic often. As a lover of change, I was ecstatic when my family announced we would be moving to the United States. From the moment I first stepped off the plane, greeted by Florida’s warm, humid air, I began taking mental notes of the similarities and differences between the two. Over the years, I connected with a lot of different aspects of American culture and living. These connections stem from the things I have discovered I enjoyed – and the things I missed. The first thing I noticed and greatly appreciated about Americans was their sensitivity to cultural differences.
The night before my first day of fourth grade, I was lying in my bed, afraid of how my classmates might treat me for not knowing English. My mother reassured me everything was going to be great. She
taught me my first phrase, “Where is the restroom?,” just in case. But when my classmates greeted me with open arms, and my teacher handed me a well-loved English-German dictionary, I knew everything was going to be okay. Americans and Germans both love their coffee – and what a relief. As an avid coffee-drinker, spending time at a local coffee shop with work material and a freshly brewed cup o’Joe is my idea of the perfect afternoon. Lucky for me, the U.S. has one of the best coffee cultures around. New York City, for example, is home to carefully crafted cold-brew drinks that are difficult to find outside of the country. Americans are incredible at public speaking. From picking up a
conversation with strangers on streets to debating like a professional politician on stage, it is a skill I immediately noticed upon my first few years – especially as someone who was very shy as a child. In Germany, people hold back a little more from speaking to or in front of others. Today, there is nothing I enjoy more than talking to new people. On my first day of fourth grade, I stood up to recite the Pledge of Allegiance for the first time. When my classmates stood up, faced the flag and put their right hand over chest, I was surprised and in awe. I had never seen anything like it in German schools before. This moment was not only one of my fondest memories of my childhood, but also one that strengthened my bond to my new home. Now this may be more specific to the Floridian lifestyle, but in general, I miss the pedestrian-style living of Germany. Everything in the country, and similarly across Europe, is made with the intention of
easy access for pedestrians and bike riders. Having the ability to walk out the door and take the next street train headed downtown is the convenience I lack in Florida.
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Culture
Music
A Music Bridge STRIKING THE RIGHT NOTE TO FIND MEANING IN MUSIC
BY Jacob Embuscado
Whether it is the vibration of a piano key, a loud clashing of cymbals on drums or even the thump of a bass drop on an EDM track, people are capable of finding beauty in music. According to an article posted on fastcompany.com, there are plenty of reasons why we have a bond with music. The article, “The Surprising Science Behind What Music Does to Our Brains,” highlights a study by Science Direct called “Crossmodal transfer of emotion by music." The study shows people can listen to happy or sad music and relate to emotions without really feeling them. Living vicariously through music can be an enjoyable break from a person's own emotions. There are also other studies from articles such as a study by PsyBlog called, “Personality Secrets in Your Mp3 Player,” which shows that genres we listen to can correspond with our personalities. Another feature of music the article highlights is its ability to help us exercise more efficiently. No matter the reason, everyone has their own idea of why music is important in their lives and why they feel so connected to it.
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Kevin Wheatle University of Florida Junior Studying MUSIC AND Vocal Performance Wheatle said he loved music when he was young, but it impacted his life in a bigger way when he went to high school. There he discovered classical compositions and choral singing. He was exposed to music as a child in the form of the R&B his parents listened to, but didn't relate to the genre. He later turned to classical music as his genre of choice. “With opera, whether it be from the classical period or the baroque period, I felt that it was something pure of a bigger sense of an expression of music,” Wheatle said. “I felt, with that, I was able to be something bigger than myself.” Wheatle performs mainly for his classes as of now. Music majors must go through critiques of their performances as part of the grade within their respective classes. After college, Wheatle wants to continue performing opera and plans on singing opera music professionally.
Adeline Morgan UF student studying Public Relations and Music Morgan said her mom noticed she was musically inclined in third grade. After moving to Florida, she signed up for voice lessons her sophomore year of high school and started getting into classical music. While there are plenty of different pieces sung in many different languages, Morgan gravitates toward French music. “I don’t really have any emotional attachments to songs, but it’s just songs I enjoy singing the most,” Morgan said. “I like French music because it has more chromaticism to it. It’s the trickiest to learn, but once you have it, it’s so easy to sing, for me at least.” Morgan performs for classes as part of a grade. Her teachers critique her as part of the grade for the class. The overall grade of the performance is evaluated from both dictation and the tone she is expressing throughout her performance. Morgan mentioned that
KEVIN WHEATLE, MUSIC MAJOR, PERFORMS THE PIANO.
after her double major is complete, she plans to work at a public relations firm, as she feels the harsh criticism that comes with musical performance can help her deal with the harsh criticism given to people working in the journalism and public relations fields.
Kenton Prescott UF junior studying Aerospace Engineering Major Prescott has a wide variety of musical tastes. He’s a person who can slow down and listen to classical music, or listen to EDM to be laser-focused. Prescott said he doesn’t necessarily have a passion for listening to music, but more of a general appreciation for it overall. However, Prescott used to play piano when he was younger and felt more passionate about music when he was creating it. Sadly, he said he hasn't had much time to play the piano recently due to other priorities. When he was playing piano, his big influences were Chopin and Frank Sinatra, which he still finds himself
listening to today. Aside from those artists, he would play mainly classical pieces of music. Despite not playing music often, he still uses music to stay focused while studying, and in some cases, finds inspiration through music when it reminds him of past events. “When I did this awesome engineering project and it succeeded, I was excited,” Prescott said. “So when I hear certain EDM songs, I get reminded of that excited feeling and I feel like a boss and I could do anything.”
Adam Shugar Junior Oak Hall High School Adam Shugar’s life has been impacted greatly by music. From playing piano to just listening to music, it has had a profound effect on him and can trigger an intense emotional response. He enjoys music's social aspect, which is apparent in the recent formation of his new band, Midbrain. Midbrain, a band with a large influence from the ‘80s band, Journey, was
created by Shugar and some of his friends. They occasionally play at the High Dive in Gainesville. Midbrain is a newer band, which can sometimes raise red flags about the chemistry of the band mates. “Of course we have our difficulties." Shugar said. "No band with people who are passionate about it aren’t going to have disagreements about where they want to go with everything. But at the end of the day, I think for the kind of culture within the band to stay healthy, it’s all about communication.” Music is a medium we often connect with, whether we perform classical pieces or just enjoy jamming out to our favorite songs. For some, music is a way to show expression, for others, a career path, and others, a fun way to stay focused. Part of the beauty of music as an art form is it allows both individual expression and group collaboration. So the next time you put on a record or plug in your headphones, think about how you connect with music.
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Culture Gamedays
Saturday in the Swamp BY Alexandra Booth PHOTOGRAPHY BY Elise Engle To Ashley Milchman, it’s a way for her to walk in her family’s shoes and continue their legacy. To Robert Booth, it brings back his favorite college memories and connects him with old friends. To me, it’s the greatest sense of community I have ever felt. Hidden in scrapbooks and photo frames, there are pictures of me as a child in Gator jumpers with orange and blue ribbons, celebrating my Gator pride. I have been cheering for the Gators for as long as I can remember, and then some. My family is connected through our mutual love for the University of Florida. My love and appreciation for game days started with my dad, Robert. A Gator grad from the class of 1979, he has owned our family tickets since 1980. He has seen a lot of history from those seats, like national championships, hall-of-famers and Heisman Trophy winners. He’s seen the worst moments, like losing seasons and constant coaching changes, but has kept our tickets despite his friends relinquishing their booster status. “No matter what happens, I’ll always be a Gator fan,” he said. “The feeling will never not be the same.” The older gentleman who has the seats next to mine says he always gets tearyeyed during the Alma Mater and when the team runs out of the tunnel. With her dad, uncle and aunt all being UF alums, Milchman knew she’d be a Gator. “It was inherent that I’d end up in the orange and blue,” she said. She grew up going to Ben Hill Griffin Stadium as well, associating Gainesville with a fun, exciting atmosphere. Sitting across from the student section in high
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school, Milchman imagined how much fun it’d be to be standing on the bleachers and cheering for the team. When she became a student, however, a new connection was created. She was able to experience a different side of the university and love the Gators in a new way, which caused her adoration to only grow. “Game days are some of the best memories I have of my four years, and I know that even after we graduate college, we'll not only reminisce on our game day memories, but return as alumni and continue to make more.”
There is no exact mold of what a Gator fan looks like. People who come from cities in and out of state proudly display the orange and blue, right hand over left, chomping in unison to welcome the boys of fall onto their battlefield. “There’s a reason why I will always go back to Gainesville – there’s just nothing like gathering with friends and family to cheer on the home team,” Booth said. Game days will always hold a special place in each of our hearts. Like Milchman said, “Being a Gator fan connects you to much more than the 60 minutes of football played.”
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Photo by Ben Cabral
Lifestyle Plants
Grow your green thumb
no matter the size of your home BRING THE OUTSIDE INSIDE WITH EASY-TO-MAINTAIN PLANTS THAT CAN ENHANCE YOUR HEALTH
BY Alexandra Booth PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze The expression “having a green thumb” is typically saved for those talented people who can bring life from ordinary soil and grow/maintain anything from Mother Nature. But everyone is capable of having a green thumb. Adding some houseplants to your home will do more than add life to a room. There are many health benefits to bringing part of the outdoors inside:
• Remove toxins: Houseplants can help purify the air and remove up to 87 percent of volatile organic compounds every day, according to NASA research. The agency suggests some of the top plants that help remove indoor pollutants are English ivy, spider plant and golden pothos. • Breathe easy: During photosynthesis, plants take in the carbon dioxide we breathe out and therefore increase oxygen levels. There are also special plants like orchids and succulents that continue the photosynthesis process at night. Bayer Advanced suggests putting these in your bedroom.
• Think clearer: Healthline reports that having houseplants not only increases
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the quality of your work, but your memory retention goes up 20 percent and productivity increases by 38 percent. While these benefits should convince people to run to their local garden center immediately, some people are still hesitant due to their living spaces. Some apartments and homes don’t offer the right amount of sunshine due to lack of windows. Plus, potted plants can be dirty because of the soil and potential bugs. However, not every plant in nature requires a lot of sunlight and water, which makes them perfect for a dimly lit apartment or for someone who doesn’t always remember to water. Some of the easiest indoor plants to grow are pothos and ivy, along with ferns, according by Chris Dengeneffe from Garden Gate Nursery. Two indoor plants that Tom Thurston, who works at the Green Market Nursery, suggests is the rubber tree and aloe plant. Thurston also mentioned the healing benefit of having an aloe plant. If you burn yourself, you don’t need to rely on
drugstore products. You can use the aloe plant to help you heal. Better Homes and Gardens also recommends the rubber tree as an easy-to-grow plant. It's also attractive because of its big leaves. Another plant that’s good for a forgetful mind is Mother-in-Law’s Tongue. This plant has thick, upright leaves and is a tough houseplant. They can grow tall, from 12 to 18 inches according to Bayer Advanced, but there are dwarf varieties. Because they can handle dark rooms or rooms with artificial or low light like bathrooms, Dengeneffe suggests this plant from personal experience. The major thing to remember, according to Thurston, is to not allow your plants to dry out. Most plants need a lot of water and people accidentally let their plants die due to under-watering. To improve your green thumb and begin your mini greenhouse, visit some local plant nurseries. They have a wide selection of indoor and outdoor plants for whatever the size of your home.
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Lifestyle Travel
How Instagram is changing the way we Experience the world
@BEENCABRAL
INSTAGRAMMERS DOCUMENT TRAVELS ON SOCIAL MEDIA
BY Janine WOlf Since its inception in 2010, Instagram now boasts more than 500 million active users monthly and 40 billion photos to date. Its easy share-andpost functionality allowed Instagram to embed itself into the way people experience travel. We asked local social media influencers about their thoughts on traveling for the ‘gram.
Amaury Sablon, 20, @amaurysablon University of Florida journalism student Amaury Sablon has been to 30 countries. “I say, and I'm not kidding, that about a third of my life will be spent at airports,” noting he took nine flights for work and vacation in one week. These days, he uses Instagram to keep track of the places he’s visited. “It's mostly for me,” he said. “My travel experience would not be the same without the Insta.” However, when it comes to his attitude toward the app, his feelings are mixed: “For better or for worse, social media has changed the way we travel,” he said. He referenced a conversation he recently had with friends in Oslo, Norway, about
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society and culture. “It's weird for us to travel and not post on our social media profiles,” he said.
Danielle Shmalberg, 36, @mermaidofthesprings When she isn’t working as a veterinary technician manager at UF’s Small Animal Hospital, Danielle Shmalberg finds herself in the clear blue water of Florida’s springs, armed with an underwater camera.
@MERMAIDOFTHESPRINGS
Casey Tomasiak, 32, @yesaccasey
“I try to post daily on Instagram, sharing photos that I have taken during my many adventures,” she said. Shmalberg believes Instagram has opened up a new way of choosing travel destinations. “I have found many new-to-me springs or conservation areas that then have become favorite spots,” she said.
A globe-trotter, Casey Tomasiak has been to all seven continents. “I love to travel because I feel like there's so much in the world to see and so many points of view to see it from,” he said. A fan of capturing moments of lush underwater life, Tomasiak said Instagram gives him the opportunity to showcase the ocean to those who rarely get to see it.
But the app has also encouraged people to visit sensitive ecosystems, which the animal lover said could be a threat to the organisms living there. “We are so lucky to have so many beautiful, unique places around our state to travel,” she said. “I try to take advantage of as many as I can within driving distance.”
“It's also great to bring awareness to the ocean,” he said. Tomasiak points out that social media has changed the way he experiences the world. “Seeing other people's posts on Instagram has encouraged me to travel to certain places that I probably would have never known about otherwise.”
@YESACCASEY
@AMAURYSABLON
Miguel Cardona, 25, @miguelcardona Miguel Cardona, a photographer, travels to feel alive. He described a recent trip to India, where he rented an old Royal Enfield motorcycle. To Cardona, freely driving around an unknown country was the ultimate adrenaline rush. “It's the greatest recipe for meeting strangers and getting into situations you would have never planned out,” he said. “My greatest fear is living a mundane life.” He views Instagram as a memory box. “Every now and then, I go back and relive a certain memory or trip,” he said. Cardona said he’s gone out of his way to capture certain photos, referring to the time in Pushkar, India, when getting a
@MIGUELCARDONA
henna tattoo turned into a spontaneous trip photographing a nomadic desert tribe. But, he assured, it’s never with the single intent of Instagraming. “Perceiving life through a phone screen is a complete setback,” he said. “Our vision has a much wider dynamic range.” Regardless, Cardona said people’s lives are perceived by their social media presence. “For this reason, our generation holds travel at higher value than others have.”
Ben Cabral, 19, @beencabral A first-year UF photojournalism student, Ben Cabral has traveled the world. In the past year alone, Cabral has been to eight different countries, and he will be
@BEENCABRAL
visiting Cuba, Greece, South America and Iceland in the next four months. “I travel because it is all I think about when I'm not traveling,” the 19-year-old said. Not only does Cabral view Instagram as a personal journal, but an outlet to voice his beliefs. “I want my followers to know that they are global citizens who should embrace the world's differences instead of being frightened by them,” he said. On a trip to an elephant conservation center just outside of Chiang Mai, Thailand, Cabral took photos of scarred elephants that had been beaten by their keepers. He posted an image to Instagram later that day. “My message was heard, and that feeling was amazing,” he said.
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Lifestyle horoscopes
horoscopes BY Lauren Rowland Photography by Leah Marshall Do you ever feel like something was just meant to be? That the stars aligned to get you that big promotion or put you in the right place at the right time to meet your significant other? The world is full of mysterious forces and fateful connections that many attribute to astrology.
Aries: March 21 - April 19 Positive – Innovative, energetic, brave and honest. They’re little warriors who often fight for the underdog. Negative – Insensitive. Too focused on what they want, they might selfishly ignore others’ needs without realizing it.
Taurus: April 20 – May 20 Positive – Pragmatic and reliable. They are earthy, fun to be around, faithful and there for the long haul. They enjoy life.
Michelle Gould
Negative – They can get stuck in a rut. Their pragmatic nature can turn into narrowness that does not allow them to move forward.
Michelle Gould is the owner of Heavenly Writing in downtown Gainesville, where she helps people understand this phenomenon. For over 20 years, she has helped people pick the perfect wedding date and choose a college major. In addition to consultations, Gould can be found teaching and giving lectures about astrology around the world. Her favorite part of her job is helping people understand where they are going and how they can start and grow. Gould said she loves helping people affirm what they already know deep down. “I like those times when I can affirm people’s paths, so they can trust themselves,” she said. Her best memory of this is when a woman came to see her after her sister heard Gould speak at a conference. The woman came to Gould wanting to know what her purpose was. Gould gave her examples of several jobs that would be meaningful to her, and shortly after, the woman left her high-paying job in sales to get a graduate degree in social work. If you believe astrology might play a role in your life, take a look at your sign based on your birthday and discover what the stars have to say about you.
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Gemini: May 21 – June 20 Positive – Witty and engaging. They are intellectually curious and know tons of things and people. Negative – They are easily bored, which can cause them to scatter. They know a little of everything, but don’t have deep knowledge of many topics.
Cancer: June 21 – July 22 Positive – Intuitive, nurturing and empathetic. They care for the people around them and want to make their hurts and pains disappear. When it comes to romance, they crave intimacy. Negative – Moody and emotional. They are like the mother who does not want to cut the umbilical cord.
Leo: July 23 – August 22 Positive – Leaders, creative and confident. They are true to who they are and help others recognize what is special about them. Negative – Their pride and ego might prevent them from applauding others. In their search for identity, they might come across as the petty tyrant.
Virgo: August 23 – September 22
Libra: September 23 – October 22
Aquarius: January 20 – February 18
Positive – Mediator, negotiator and diplomat. They are bridge builders and able to restore harmony. They have a fine eye for aesthetic.
Positive – Always questioning the norms. Although they might feel like outsiders looking into social order or cliques, they don’t try hard to fit in, and they see all people as equal.
Negative – Their need for fairness can be crippling. They have a hard time making decisions.
Scorpio: October 23 – November 21 Positive – Powerful healers, always asking, “Why?” Natural psychologists, probing into motives and what makes life, life. Negative – They might have a hard time letting people in because they’re afraid of betrayal.
Sagittarius: November 22 – December 21
Positive – Crafty, perfectionist technicians. They are good at discerning and analyzing situations. They are productive and can see when things are falling short and fix them.
Positive – Tolerant, generous and joyful. They ask big questions. They are travelers, gypsies and evangelists who are always looking for new experiences.
Negative – They take their fine eye for detail and start turning it on themselves, being too critical.
Negative – They can be morally self-righteous, thinking their way is the best way. They might scatter and refuse to settle because the grass is always greener somewhere else.
Negative – They might disagree just to disagree. They are stubborn and can feel alienated or isolated.
Pisces: February 19 – March 20 Positive – Sensitive, compassionate, healers. They’re empathetic and have a capacity for unconditional love. If they see you need a shirt, they will give you theirs. Negative – Sometimes they cannot turn off their sensitivity. They want to run away when they feel like they cannot fix things.
Capricorn: December 22 – January 19 Positive – Ambitious, hardworking and self-disciplined. They pick goals and fight for their completion. They don’t expect to be applauded – what you see is what you get. Negative – They get attached to what they want and might isolate themselves in search for it. They neglect their personal life and might put work above play.
Lifestyle Fandoms
Finding Friendship through fandoms HOW EXTREME FANS CAN BOND THROUGH THEIR SHARED PASSION
BY Li Stalder PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze When Lynn Zubernis fell for the television show “Supernatural” and its fandom over a decade ago, she experienced a slight identity crisis. She was supposed to be a professor, a psychologist, a mom, a wife. She thought, “What am I doing? Am I allowed to be crazy in love with a television show?” It took a long time, but she eventually realized how healthy it was to be passionate about it. Those thoughts led Zubernis, a clinical psychologist and professor at West Chester University of Pennsylvania, to research why she had felt so guilty, only to dive deeper into fan psychology and to write several books about the “Supernatural” fandom specifically. So, what exactly is a “fandom”? Zubernis says a fandom is “the community of some sort that forms around a shared passion.” Specifically with media fandoms, a person becomes a fan usually when there’s a character (or characters) that he or she identifies with or there’s a theme that speaks to the person. The strength of relationships distinguishes many fandom communities. Zubernis compared a fandom to a close-knit neighborhood. “It becomes not just about the shared passion, even though that’s still there, but it just becomes people encountering other people,” she says. How can you connect with other fans?
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For starters, the internet has made it extremely easy to start a debate on whether Severus Snape is a good or bad person or share your fan fiction about Luke Skywalker with someone halfway across the world. You can also meet face to face by joining a club or attending fan conventions — such as MegaCon in Orlando or Tampa Bay, or the renowned San Diego Comic-Con — and premieres. Whichever you choose, it’s almost certain you’ll find someone who feels the same way you do about a fictional story.
JOINING A CLUB When Kayla Wilson stepped onto the University of Florida campus as a freshman, the buildings and architecture instantly reminded her of Hogwarts. It wasn’t long before she found her way to the UF Quidditch team. Now, as a junior, she is the club’s president. Quidditch is the popular wizards’ sport from the Harry Potter series. For the most part, it’s played the same way, except for one difference. “The major thing is that you can’t fly, and that’s what we always get asked,” Wilson says. “No, we just run around.” While some just come for the sport, many are recruited because of their love for J.K. Rowling’s wizarding world. “To build a good team atmosphere, we’ll hang out and watch Harry Potter movies,” Wilson says.
Going to movie premieres or book releases Maria Vargas’ favorite Harry Potter fandom memory is attending a bookstore’s release party for “The Cursed Child” in Austin, Texas with about 2,000 other fans. She dressed up as Bellatrix Lestrange and yelled, “I killed Sirius Black!” all around the parking lot. She met a girl, dressed up as Moaning Myrtle, who had a toilet seat hanging around her neck. Vargas, a UF public relations student, wasn’t always a fan, though. She quickly converted after reading the entire book series in two weeks during fall of 2015. “I didn’t like Harry Potter when the releases were still going on for the books because, at the time, I thought people were crazy,” she says. “But now I’m crazy, too.”
Collecting and dealing memorabilia As a huge sci-fi fan, Bill London, 66, has an entire room of collectibles, which he estimates is about 2,000 items, with most being “Star Trek” related. London started collecting in 1992 because he wanted to build a time capsule for his son, Will. He went out and bought everything on the day Will was born, including newspapers and toys from that year, which got him started. London says nostalgia is what collecting is all about. “It’s something that keeps you connected to your youth
"STAR TREK" FAN BILL LONDON SMILES IN FRONT OF HIS PERSONAL COLLECTION OF MEMORABILIA.
and your past,” he says. “When I see these things, they remind me of what I was doing and when they first came out, which was many, many years ago.” He also has a toy shop in High Springs, Gainesville where he sells pop culture memorabilia to fellow fans. “It’s an interesting universe of people.”
Attending fan conventions London has also traveled to different conventions across the country, including the San Diego ComicCon and the Las Vegas “Star Trek” Convention, where he got his most treasured item, a figure of Sentinel Prime from “Transformers,” signed by Leonard Nimoy in 2011.
Zubernis noted there are about 20 “Supernatural” fan conventions each year. “There are just as many people who are excited about meeting up with fellow fans as they are about taking a picture with the actors,” she says.
Writing fan fiction and sharing online Jaquelin Elliott and Megan Fowler, UF English doctoral student-instructors, like to introduce fan fiction in their classes whenever they discuss topics like reader response or adaptation. The biggest misconceptions students have are that fan fiction is not written as well as professional fiction or it’s all about erotica, but it’s much more general than that. “Our definition of fan fiction is fan-produced work that doesn’t make
profit and is made as a labor of love,” Fowler says. People who write fan fiction often come from marginalized groups, Elliott mentions, such as the LGBTQ+ community or fans of color. “You have a chance to open up a space for representation that you don’t normally get to see in mainstream media,” Elliott says, adding that fan fiction allows them to fill in what’s lacking. “Often times fans can become so attached to fan creations, even more so than the (original) text itself.” So, if you’ve done any of these things and connected with others while doing so, then congratulations, you’re part of a fandom.
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Photo by Chris Totzke
Food Cooking
Cooking with Company
BY elise Engle PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totzke Like most activities, cooking is a lot more fun when you do it with other people. Last summer, I frequently lit my food on fire and set off the smoke detectors, and those experiences likely would’ve been a lot less fun – and much scarier – had my roommates not been there to laugh at me and help me clean up. For many, cooking has brought them closer to individuals within their immediate family, but it has the potential to do so much more. Plenty of others have formed stronger friendships and been connected to new people through cooking and having a sit-down meal.
crock-pot mondays With the new year, roommates Kaleigh and Emma decided to start a new tradition – Crock-Pot Mondays. Armed with a 30-year-old Crock-Pot that belonged to Kaleigh’s mother, the two began gathering recipes for their new weekly ritual. Each Monday, they switch off on who makes the meal and who makes the side dish. According to Kaleigh, the goals of Crock-Pot Mondays are to be healthier and spend more time together. “I think that it encourages Emma and I to actually sit down and eat a meal, because otherwise we’d just sit in front of the TV and eat cereal or something,” she said. “This way, we actually sit at the table and catch up. Quality roommate time.” So far, they’ve made recipes such as homemade chicken noodle soup and barbeque pork, and they hope to soon try slow-cooked chocolate molten lava cake.
TAco night
bond with my roomie and meet some of her closest friends.” Several people came over and took part in the cooking, which also included socializing and dancing around the kitchen. Menu items included beef, chicken, shrimp and queso dip, as well as the usual toppings for tacos. The interesting part about Kasey’s taco night was that each guest met at least one new person. Kasey said that despite having just met, everyone was comfortable with each other by the end of the night, telling stories and laughing like long-time friends. “Food always brings people together, and I always love when my friends meet each other,” Kasey said. “Taco night was fun, and me and Arianne are planning on doing another ‘family’ dinner soon.”
Kasey and her roommate, Arianne, wanted a reason to entertain friends at their apartment, so they decided to host a taco night. “Taco night was a great way to start off the semester,” Arianne said. “I was in Jacksonville the semester prior, so this was a great opportunity to
Crock-Pot Mondays give two roommates a chance to catch up and bond each week, while taco night gave people an opportunity to socialize and make new friends in a relaxed setting. If none of these ideas seems appealing to your taste buds, don’t worry – there’s an
endless amount of quick and simple recipes out there that are perfect for you and your friends to tackle. If you succeed, you get to end your day on a small victory. But if you’re like me, and your food ends up engulfed in flames, at least you can all laugh about it. It’s a win-win! Regardless of how the food turns out, the real purpose of the night is to unwind and make lasting memories. Our friends are the family we choose, so why not sit down around the table with them every once in a while?
ADD VARIETY TO YOUR MENU • Soup Sunday • Meatless Monday • Thai Tuesday • Waffle Wednesday • Tater Tot Thursday • Fish Friday • Stir-Fry Saturday
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Food Dinner
Around the Family Table GATHERING FOR DINNERS FOSTERS STRONG FAMILY RELATIONSHIPS
BY CHLOE STRADINGER PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze
“Dinner!” my mom would call to us from down the street. Next came the ding-a-ling sound of the dinner bell, which doubled as the end-ofgame whistle to whatever sport we were playing at our neighbors’ that evening. My brother, sister and I, perfumed by the springy smells of grass, dirt and sweat, would run home, wash our hands and sit down at our respective spots around the table. We always sat at the same spots. Even as the years passed, and the dinner alert changed from a bell to a text message, we still made an effort to sit down together in our designated chairs. Our conversations matured, the dinner menu got a bit more gourmet, but we all still ended our day around that table. And I’m so glad we did. Sitting down as a family is a simple ritual that has been a key tradition in socializing young people for ages. A study in a 2006 edition of New Directions for Child and Adolescent Development found that eating dinner with the family helps kids build vocabulary and develop social
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skills. And the benefits spread into the teenage years, too. The National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse found that teens who have family dinners five to seven nights per week say they feel they have a better relationship with their parents and are also less likely to use alcohol or drugs. In today’s busy world, finding the time is not so easy. Between sports practices, dance rehearsals, meetings, work conflicts, homework assignments and life in general, it’s easy to give up on getting everyone
together. According to a Pew Research study, 31 percent of parents say they always feel rushed. Thirty-six percent of parents say they feel they spend too little time with their kids. Life moves fast, and slowing down to enjoy the little things is as important at ever. Family dinners are the perfect time to do this through sharing stories, laughs, and the day's highs and lows. Some of my best memories come from time spent around the glass table in my kitchen. My family’s
It's Dinner Time
connection strengthened through new conversations and old stories. It was around that table that I heard the story of the day my grandfather proposed to my grandmother. When he popped the question in the car, she was so surprised that she opened the door, threw up and then exclaimed, “Yes!” As I got older, I was privy to hilarious stories about my mom and dad as a young couple. In their early 20s while
living in D.C., they took a drunken tour of the White House together. My dad peed in the Vice President’s private bathroom and left his thumbprint all over the inside of the Vice President's desk drawers.
close together. Night after night, I witnessed how a healthy relationship should look as I watched my parents interact. I created close bonds with my siblings and to this day turn to them for advice.
While I cherish all the funny stories and memories we shared, the greatest part of the family dinners were the seemingly mundane moments. It was the ceremony of sitting down together that brought my family so
So sit down with your family. Eat early or late to work around sports practices and throw a frozen pizza in the oven if you don’t have time to cook. It’s the sitting down together that counts.
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Food Burgers
The Eccentric Eating
Experience BY Jacob Embuscado
PHOTOGRAPHY BY jayna goldstein Hankering for a burger? Sure, you can have your standard bacon cheeseburger and be on your way. Or, you can push the boundaries a little bit. You know, get out of your comfort zone! In Gainesville, the burgers are as unique as the people in the city, and there are so many kinds of outsidethe- box ideas for what makes up a burger. I could go on and on about every burger in Gainesville, but these three burgers stood out the most as odd, yet satisfying treats to create an eccentric eating experience you will enjoy.
Sweet Mel’s – Sweet Mel Burger The name may suggest your run-ofthe-mill signature restaurant burger, but this is far from it. While some restaurants coin a signature burger with just a unique sauce, the Sweet Mel burger takes it a big step forward and instead focuses on the bun. The burger is a classic cheeseburger, but instead of being nestled between two hamburger buns, each patty of a Sweet Mel burger rests in the middle of two funnel cakes. This burger has a perfect mix of sweet and savory, a taste reminiscent of a state fair carnival.
Sweet Mel’s – Tso Good Burger So maybe sweet isn’t your thing. Maybe you want to go for something more daring. Well, the Tso Good burger, as the name suggests, mixes
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RELISH BURGERS — JACOB'S CRAZY CREATION CONSISTS OF PB&J ON A BURGER TOPPED OFF WITH CRISPY ONION STRINGS, LETTUCE, GRILLED ONIONS, FRESH JALAPEÑOS AND A FRIED EGG.
the spicy, oriental taste of General Tso’s chicken with a hearty, juicy burger. While initially overwhelming, this combo is very inviting. It perfectly mixes the delicious taste of sweet, spicy and savory all into one meal. It merges a Chinese food favorite, using General Tso’s sauce, chicken tenders and sriracha, with an American classic.
Relish Burgers This next burger will bring back some fond memories of childhood. Growing up, one of my favorite sandwiches was peanut butter and jelly. Now, you can relive that childhood memory with a burger from Relish. At Relish, they have plenty of toppings to choose
SWEET MEL'S TSO GOOD BURGER
SWEET MEL'S SWEET MEL BURGER
from to create your own burger. You can choose from a wide variety such as pineapples, fresh jalapeños and fried onion strings as well as sauces like spicy mayonnaise, barbecue sauce and of course, peanut butter and jelly. With these choices, there are so many odd, yet satisfying food combinations you can create. My personal favorite, however, has been the succulent combination of Skippy creamy peanut butter and Smucker’s strawberry jam on a burger, topped off with crispy onion strings, lettuce, grilled onions, fresh jalapeños and a fried egg. The mixture of textures alone is interesting, but the taste is divine. The combination of sweet, savory and just a little bit of spicy lingers on your taste buds and keeps you coming back for more. No matter what your taste buds desire, you will be able to find something that satisfies your needs. From the carnival twist, to Asian fusion to creating your own unique flavor, each burger has something special about it and offers something new to your palate. So go out there and explore only the finest and weirdest burgers.
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Food Coffee
Coffee Connection: Gainesville and Guatemala LINKING TWO COMMUNITIES ONE CUP AT A TIME
BY Aileen Mack PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totzke When you enter the Bagel Bakery at the Millhopper Shopping Center, you’re greeted by smiling faces and the aroma of coffee and freshly made bagels. It’s a privately owned restaurant serving bagels, sandwiches and wraps with a counter and seat-yourself policy. But before you enjoy a cup of its Guatemalan coffee, know that it took a grand journey to provide you with your morning dose of caffeine.
The Guatemalan cherries are picked by hand by farmers and their families, put on a mule, taken to a farm, pulped and fermented. Then they are washed and dried before being picked up and taken to Guatemala City to be processed and separated from the parchment. From there, they travel on a truck and a boat to New Orleans. Then Ken Rembert, owner of Bagel Bakery, orders them by the palette, and they’re delivered on a
truck to the store. His employees then roast the beans, grind them and make the coffee daily in the store. It’s put into a coffee dispenser where customers fill their cups under a sign with photos from Rembert’s trips to Guatemala. Nora Avery, a longtime Gainesville resident, appreciates the relationship Rembert has with the farmers and enjoys the coffee, which a wholesaler described to Rembert as chocolaty, with good body and nice finish. “It makes you more motivated,” said Priscilla Parker, Gainesville resident and Bagel Bakery customer. “I think anything that has a second cause to it now people want to be involved with.” For over a decade, Rembert has gotten his coffee from Guatemala through this process. He has built relationships with the farmers, seeing their children grow up and visiting each year, so now they have a connection with the U.S. as well. Working with independent farmers, who aren’t bound by contracts and can sell to whomever they want, Rembert pays them 30 percent more than fair trade. Also, the money from the tip jar, which raises about $13,000 a year, goes to support three schools, while the money from the jar for coffee refills helps pay for water filters in homes. About 100 people have clean water thanks to Rembert and his customers. All of this is possible with the help of Walter Machado, who is with the HOPE Bible Mission, which seeks to impact communities by empowering and partnering with them to improve their economics and education systems, said Rick Carey, who is also with HOPE Bible Mission and working with Rembert. They help with community projects, talk to the farmers and purchase the coffee. Because the Guatemalan government cuts funding after middle school, Rembert also helps some parents pay for a portion of their children’s education.
GUATEMALAN FARMERS HARVESTED THESE COFFEE CHERRIES BEFORE SENDING THEM TO THE UNITED STATES. PHOTO COURTESY OF KEN REMBERT.
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Part of the organization’s idea is that as growers get a greater return on their product, they could invest in their community. Carey assists the small farmers, who produce less than 200 pounds of coffee, to be able to sell to people like Rembert by helping them in processing and exporting the coffee. These farmers don’t have the opportunity to reach a greater market, and this gets them the top price for their product, he said.
KEN REMBERT, OWNER OF BAGEL BAKERY, SERVES A CUSTOMER.
It all started with a cap a customer named Paul Emery was wearing, which read, “Mission Aviation Fellowship.” Rembert asked the pilot from Guatemala about the missionary trips he does and got connected with a group in Guatemala through Emery. When Rembert's store was part of a franchise, he used Seattle’s Best Coffee. However, he wanted to have his own brand to gain leverage over pricing and have a consistent name on the coffee. So he trademarked Rembrandt Coffee, a play off his last name, went to Guatemala and started roasting the coffee in the store. “It’s a direct-relationship coffee, literally. I get to meet the guys, so I know them. I get to see their families, not all of them but some of them, every year, so that’s a real positive,” Rembert said. “It’s kind of like buying from a local store. I buy directly from them.” His visits keep him excited about the schools, water filters and coffee. And with the filters, Rembert gets to meet
the families and talk to them for at least 20 minutes, and “by the end everyone’s laughing,” he said. The communities he visits have a range of 150 to 500 Mayan and Hispanic people who speak Spanish or Ixil. Most of their homes are made of sticks or blocks and have only one room. Some people have stoves, but others cook over open fire in their homes. As of about four years ago, many of them have cell phones, and some have TVs, but they don’t have internet, he said. Early on during his visits, he used to stay near a church and would eat meals with the pastor and his family. Now, one of the pastor’s sons, whom Rembert has known since he was about 12, is married and has kids. He happened to be there with his wife and child during one of Rembert’s visits and spent an hour and a half talking to him. Because of these visits, Rembert understands how difficult coffee is to produce and the variables that can affect it, such as diseases affecting the plants, production in other countries
affecting the price of coffee and how time-consuming harvesting is by picking cherry after cherry. He mentions how customers approach him and enjoy that they’re linked to a group in Guatemala. Through the photos on the wall in the store, they learn how the coffee is made and about the country it comes from. Through his father’s work, Davis Rembert has felt a connection to Guatemala since his father started working with the farmers. He remembers when his father got the idea and watched the store develop, but he didn’t understand the depth and the impact until he accompanied him on one of his trips, he said. “After going down there and seeing it, especially the schools, it’s nice to know that he changes some people’s lives, especially whenever he walks up and they recognize him on the spot,” Davis said. “There’s people who will literally just run up to him and hug him. He’s just great down there.”
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Food Pairings
The Art of Wine and Cheese Pairings, Simplified BY Elise Engle PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totzke
I have a lot of experience with wine and cheese. By experience, I mean I consume both of them regularly, typically in large quantities. Unfortunately, this “experience” hasn’t necessarily translated into “knowledge,” so when I set out to discover the best wine and cheese pairings available to me on a budget that definitely values quantity over quality, I had no idea what I was getting myself into. Upon arriving at my Publix of choice, I selected products based on two main criteria: price and packaging. I wanted the most cheese I could possibly get for my money, but I refused to jeopardize the Instagram-ability of my wine. I ended up with four bottles of wine and enough cheese to feed every mouse in Gainesville for the next century. I also purchased a cheese board, because it seemed essential to maximize the taste of the cheese – and my street cred. (“She has a cheese board, so she must be an expert-level cheese connoisseur.”) With a promising number of combinations, I felt confident that it was time to start making some decisions.
3. Chardonnay + Baby Swiss When it comes to Chardonnay, you have a choice
between oak-aged and un-oaked. The oaked has an
added flavor resulting from the wood. This makes for a wide variety of tastes within the realm of Chardonnay,
resulting in a fun, casual wine. Swiss is sweet and mild, making it a great match for any flavor of Chardonnay.
4. Riesling + Mozzarella Riesling can range from dry to sweet. No matter which way it leans, the creamy and milky taste of mozzarella compliments it well. To me, mozzarella is the perfect quesadilla cheese. An ideal night in should always
include a quesadilla and a wine that I can drink straight
1. Merlot + Cheddar Hello, Merlot. Although it’s sometimes not as highly
from the bottle without feeling bad. Riesling is that wine.
and low acidity, which balance out the sharpness of
5. Cabernet or Sauvignon Blanc + Blue Cheese
is rarely paired with Merlot, so I made the executive
Cabernet and Sauvignon Blanc are incredibly acidic,
regarded as Cabernet, its fruitiness pairs well with a
nice, sharp Cheddar. Merlot is known for its smoothness the cheese. Based on my minimal research, Cheddar decision to bend the rules with this one.
so you need to pair them with food! (Cheese, maybe?)
I found that blue cheese, with its salty and tangy taste, adds perfect contrast to the overwhelming flavor of
2. Everything + Gouda On planet Earth, it’s practically indisputable that Gouda is one of the most popular and cherished cheeses. You can’t spell “Gouda” without “God.” Coincidence? No.
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these wines.
As if it wasn’t already painfully obvious, I don’t know anything about wine and cheese. At all. Luckily, I don’t need to, and neither do you. As it turns out, it’s way less about doing it the “right way” and more about having fun with it. So, grab a fun-looking wine and a cheese you’ve never tried, and then switch your focus to having a good time!
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Photo by Vanessa Vlandis
Q & A WITH THE COVER MODEL
Madison Nagle 21
Name: Age:
How do you connect with modeling?
It's empowering to be able to express yourself and work with creative minds
Favorite beauty product?
Bobbi Brown Shimmer Brick Bronzer
Most tempting midnight snack?
FLAMIN' HOT Cheetos
Ryan Gosling or Ryan Reynolds?
Gonna have to side with Blake Lively on this one
Favorite workout studio/app?
Sobekick, the best workout you can get in Miami
Go-to Miami hangout spot?
Books & Books Cafe, great food and reads
Best relationship advice you’ve ever received?
Make sure you are the crazy one
Who’s your model inspiration?
Hailey Clauson
How do you stay connected to Gainesville?
Moving to Miami and switching to online classes has been challenging, but my friends are so supportive, and I make my way back to The Swamp whenever I have time off
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Style Fashion
always true co. By Rebecca Rubin Photography by Vanessa Vlandis
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A chill vibe radiates from Always True Co.'s Gainesville workspace, which the team has affectionately dubbed "The Basement." Each member greets each other with a hug as they walk in the garage-turned-office headquarters. It's exactly this authentic ambience that the founders, Drew Howard and Kevin Masaro, strive to capture in their line of distressed, one of a kind apparel. Orange & Blue 71
Behind the Brand The company name holds much more meaning than just the mantra to be real. In fact, it was first the stage name of Drew’s older brother and rapper, Brandon K. Howard. In 2012, Brandon was tragically struck by a taxi and killed during his sophomore year at the University of Central Florida. To honor his legacy, Drew and his best friend created a brand that unapologetically represented him. Drew, a 22-year-old UF marketing and finance senior, and Masaro, a 23-year-old UF alumni, design, distress and detail the clothing before it’s finalized. They draw inspiration from everywhere they feel a genuine connection. They don’t execute any aspect of the brand if it doesn’t align with their mission. 72 Orange & Blue
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“We’re trying to just listen to ourselves and listen to what’s going on in our own heads.” – Kevin Masaro
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Leaving a Legacy Drew’s younger brother, Sam, and the brand’s photographer, Vanessa Vlandis, complete the core Always True team. Together, they thrive off even the sheer possibility of impacting people around them. Always True Co. launched on Dec. 1, 2015, and since, they’ve had people come up to them and share how much the company has inspired them. “The idea of being able to move people, it’s pretty rewarding,” Masaro said. “And you don’t even realize it either." As a group of motivated 20-somethings, they are experimenting as they go. “I just want everyone to see we’re doing this,” Masaro said. “We have no idea what we’re doing.”
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Style Wearable tech
Wireless wears BY Jacob Embuscado PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze We live in an age when technology is continuing to get smarter and better. Scientific advances have helped us create a multitude of things, from smartphones to smart TVs, and our society has been enveloped in technology. Wearable technology is perhaps one of the most intriguing advances. Wearable technology can mean a variety of things. Its basic definition, according to Investopedia, is an electronic device one can wear on the body, either through an accessory or as part of a material used in clothing. This ranges from virtual reality headsets to Bluetooth headphones and fitness trackers. The most common wearable tech, however, seems to be smartwatches.
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This is particularly noticeable with Apple’s line of smartwatches. According to Chris Neiger’s article, “3 Top Wearable Tech Stocks for 2016,” while Apple is relatively new to the wearable tech scene, the company outsold all other wearable tech companies aside from Fitbit in 2015. As of 2016, Apple has a 74 percent market share over the wearable tech market and is expected to have similar results for the next four years. “Overall, it kind of makes life a little easier,” said Akira Kuroiwa, a sophomore chemical engineering major at the University of Florida. He said his Apple Watch Series 2 helps him with daily chores: checking the
weather, looking at his heart rate to keep an eye on his health and changing songs while he is in the shower. He also finds the voice control for it very helpful. “You can do everything with this that almost a phone can do,” Kuroiwa said. Even with this functionality, there are still concerns. According to a study by COLLOQUY, a marketing-focused research company, 63 percent of consumers still think wearables are too pricey. On top of that, 58 percent said they want to use a wearable but feel too old, 52 percent said they don’t understand wearables and 32 percent of people said they are concerned with their privacy when using wearable tech.
Apple Watch: ALUMINUM CASE WITH SPORT BAND, FROM $269, APPLE.COM
Luis Zavala, a senior UF biology major, prefers a different kind of smartwatch. Zavala prefers to use Android products, specifically Samsung. He purchased a Samsung Gear S2 smartwatch, one of Apple’s competitors. “I’d say it’s definitely starting off with just the main demand of convenience for it, like not having to take my phone out every so many seconds to look at it and just receive it from my wrist directly,” he said. However, even with this convenience, Zavala said he is comfortable not having the wearable always on his wrist. He prefers to use it when he’s studying or working for long periods of time at
Costco, when his hands are busy. He also refrains from wearing it sometimes to avoid getting scratches on the device. “I’d say I’m pretty acclimated, pretty balanced with not having it on or having it on,” Zavala said. Then there are others who don’t see as big of a need for wearable technology, specifically smartwatches. Richard Kidd, a computer-engineering student at UF, owns a first-generation Apple Watch, but has his own reasons as to why it isn’t as prevalent to him.
else about it,” Kidd said. He said a lot of the features are only minor conveniences to him. He likes to be timely, so he got it for the obvious reason to buy a watch. However, features such as setting timers, checking weather and other functions aren’t as important to him as they may be for some. “It’s nowhere near the difference between going from a feature phone to when I first got my iPhone. I mean, that was a huge difference,” Kidd said.
“I really don’t think it’s made a huge difference in my own life, so it’s a little hard for me to sort of convince somebody
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Style Students
Student Entrepreneurs
Thrive Online
BY Rebecca Rubin PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze Before the internet took off, small business owners needed tangible stores to sell goods. Having stores meant paying rent, paying employees and paying utilities. In other words, it wasn’t always financially realistic for students to start up a new brick retail company. Social media has opened up new doors for young budding entrepreneurs. In 2016, studies showed one-third of startups are located on college campuses. Without extra expenses, college business owners are taking advantage of this golden age of internet by using social media as a platform to not just promote their products, but actually sell them as well. And Instagram has the numbers to justify this visual approach. Over 400 million people worldwide use Instagram daily, and 70 percent of users follow a business on Instagram, according to Instagram’s analytics. Over 5 million businesses are currently on Instagram, using the platform to post pictures, stream videos and launchad campaigns. From those tactics, 60 percent of Instagrammers say they’ve discover new products on Instagram, and 75 percent have taken action after being intrigued by a brand’s post. From homemade game day apparel and clothing, to jewelry and accessories, these business owners use social media to showcase their business without needing a storefront. Rather than just post pictures of the items individually, they often utilize a blog style approach, which features day-to-day pictures of actual customers sporting these items. This personalized method has curated
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thousands of followers, most popularly on Instagram. With 59 percent of 18-29 year olds using Instagram, it’s no surprise businesses reach out online to their core consumer demographic, collegiate students who constantly consume media. The World Wide Web has provided both a stage to distribute their merchandise and a successful medium to engage customers.
have a competition (on social media). We (had) a big one for spring break mostly where we created a hashtag, #DareToBear. We’re going to choose a winner to get a $100 gift card who has the best photo.”
Gabrielle Finkel Robert Felder Company: Bearbottom Clothing @bearbottomclothing What they do: Bearbottom Clothing consists of men’s apparel, including shorts, swimwear, shirts and belts. For every pair sold, they donate one to a child in need. Instagram followers: 9K How social media influences the company: “I don’t sell anything in person. We try to keep the content interesting and not always pushing our product but more of just the lifestyle and activities. That’s why we like more of the user content because people will tag us and tell us that we can use their photos. Every once in a while we’ll
Company: By Gabby @bygabby_ What they do: Before By Gabby took off, girls had to shop in the men’s department for game day apparel. Enter Gabby Finkel, who created custom apparel geared for college women to wear to tailgates on football game days. Instagram followers: 8.3K How social media influences the company: “We post pictures that are really relatable to our market. Just young college girls at tailgates or parties or with their friends who can see themselves in the pictures and shirts. It’s only affected business in a good way because people love when we share their pictures. It’s a big thing in our generation. It’s a community that makes people feel good about themselves. I have a million pictures on my phone to post of girls wearing shirts that I made. It’s just a good feeling.”
NATASHA JEWETT OF SUEDE. STRATEGICALLY PHOTOGRAPHS PEOPLE WEARING HER PRODUCT TO FEATURE ON HER COMPANY'S INSTAGRAM ACCOUNT.
Natasha Jewett Company: Suede @suede.shop What they do: Suede uses Instagram to sell custom, homemade jewelry. Jewett, along with her two roommates, create unique chokers and necklaces aimed for college women. Instagram followers: 1.4K How social media influences the company:“I’d say it’s the entirety of our business. What I find so special about social media and business nowadays is that 10 years ago you had to run a business by owning a store or having a website and we’ve been able to createa business entirely through a social media platform, which makes it so unique from a lot of businesses, and especially since we ourselves have grown up through the social media age. Our fashion sense kind of pushes us forward through social media.”
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Style
Dupes
Does Spending more on Makeup make it better? BY Mary Kate Cobb PHOTOGRAPHY BY Chris Totkze It is always a good time to save money on makeup. A common assumption is that the most expensive option must be better, especially when it comes to beauty products. So, I tested six high-end items to see if they lived up to their name, or if their drugstore dupes overpowered them. Here’s a hint: there’s no need to splurge.
NYX HD Studio Finishing Powder - Translucent Finish vs. Laura Mercier Translucent Loose Setting Powder
Maybelline The Falsies Push Up Drama Mascara vs. Lancome Grandiôse Mascara
The NYX powder is only $10, while Laura Mercier’s costs $38. The only caveat is that the NYX powder shows in flash pictures, while Laura Mercier’s does not. However, in everyday light there is virtually no difference between these two finishing powders. Both lock in foundation and concealer for hours without creasing.
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Long, luscious lashes are what many women dream of. Maybelline’s mascara has been a cult favorite for a while. Its price of about $9 is tough to compete with. However, Lancome’s mascara, $32, is worth the investment. Lancome’s mascara is, in my opinion, the one high-end mascara that even comes close to beating a drugstore brand. Both mascaras offer long lashes with minimal flaking, but the Maybelline mascara might not last all day like Lancome’s does.
Maybelline Instant Age Rewind Eraser Dark Circles Treatment COncealer VS. Urban Decay Naked Skin Concealer
Ardell false Eyelashes vs. Sephora Collection False Eyelashes These $3.99 lashes give Sephora’s $14 lashes a run for their money. Sephora’s lashes might hold up for a second use better than Ardell’s. However, that still doesn’t make up for the price difference. Long, wispy lashes are yours for the taking.
NYX Total Control Drop Foundation vs. Too Faced Born This Way Foundation
NYX dropped a total game changer when it released its $14 buildable, breathable full-coverage foundation. With a dewy glow, it’s giving its $39 counterpart some tough competition. Both are buildable and offer a very natural finish, but Too Faced does offer more coverage with fewer coats.
The only distinctions between these two concealers is about the $20 price difference and that the Urban Decay concealer might last a few more hours. Both offer a wide range of shades and so much coverage your dark circles will be nowhere in sight.
Neutrogena Healthy Skin Blends Natural Radiance Bronzer vs. Benefit Hoola Matte Bronzer
Finding a matte drugstore bronzer is not as easy task. That’s why Benefit’s Hoola has always been a staple for me, until now. Neutrogena has come out with a matte bronzer that puts all other drugstore ones to shame. Although the price difference is about $15, they’ll both give you that “l just got back from the Bahamas” glow without making you look muddy. The Hoola bronzer is a little more pigmented, but both will last throughout the day.
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