Prompt Number 1: Competing Memory/Uncertain Memory

Prompt Number 1

Option #1 Competing memory

Please write about a personal memory from your own perspective and then again from competing perspectives. To do this, you should consider moments and experiences when you were not alone. You might want to interview a friend or family member to see how they remember the situation differently.

Option #2 Uncertain memory

Explore a memory that feels uncertain or that is filled with gaps. It can be a memory about anything, perhaps a difficult or traumatic event, but it doesn’t need to be. Are there moments you are uncertain about? Think about showing “your mind on the page.” Do your thoughts interrupt themselves?

Lisa Bukatina

Probably there hasn’t yet been a day, or a few, when I didn’t look back on the event that parted my life into before and after. All I remember was being mad at my mom for not letting me stay after classes at my grandma’s place – I had no idea why. It felt as if she were jealous that I spent more time with my granny. Only after a few months would I regret thinking that way. I don’t remember my mood in the first part of the day, but I clearly remember me coming home to find my granny there (yay!) – I guess she wasn’t a frequent visitor, and each time she used to come over, I would get all excited and make a commotion over her.

I reached out to ring a bell, not thinking about anything at all – lucky girl. And there she was, my dear granny, standing in front of me with her eyes empty and her shoulders drooping. Not even the slightest smile flickered across her face – why so? I thought to myself and couldn’t find a decent answer. She wasn’t mad at me, was she? Was she tired of me, was I annoying her? I stood in the doorway, trying to force a smile, hoping she would smile back at me – she didn’t. That was new. I felt somewhat guilty. My granny has always been the sweetest person I’ve ever met – she could not for the life of her be mad at her little granddaughter. Tired? Transfixed, she kept standing in front of me, still silent. That was when the real confusion crept over me.

I tried my best not to show that my mind was in turmoil. And so did she. The next thing I know – or I think I know – was trying to call my mom, but there was no answer. There were only two of us in the apartment, and for some reason, I felt lonely. My voice was echoing around the rooms because we’ve just moved in and the place was practically empty. “When’s mom coming? – She isn’t.” It echoed back into me. Granny came over not to see me, to spend more time with me. She came to substitute my mom for some time (that sounds awful, no one can be a substitution good enough), while she was away (where?). Little did I know that “for some time” would turn into years. Years of confusion and dismay.

When something out of place happens, especially if it’s something grievous (at that point I had no idea it would be so), you try your best to pretend as if nothing had happened, or that everything will soon be alright again – though rarely it actually does get better. Fake it ‘till you make it, right? That is what I started doing, I think. I was pretending