Celebrating Seniors HAPPY, HEALThY LIVING Supplement to Jewish News June 16, 2014
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Senior Living
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many remain employed, active in their professions…or perhaps in their second or third careers. Even those who may suffer some of the ill effects of age still manage to get out (thanks to ramps and physical therapies and orthopedic surgeons and caregivers) and go to dinner, attend the symphony and relish each day and each other. Speaking of each other, we have a
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heart-warming article about a couple that has made it for 60 years, Kitty and Abbott Saks. Their story is inspiring. It’s nearly impossible to pick up a paper or magazine that doesn’t have an article touting the benefits of exercise, especial-
Published 22 times a year by United Jewish Federation of Tidewater. Reba and Sam Sandler Family Campus of the Tidewater Jewish Community 5000 Corporate Woods Drive, Suite 200 Virginia Beach, Virginia 23462-4370 voice 757.965.6100 • fax 757.965.6102 email news@ujft.org www.jewishVA.org Terri Denison, Editor Germaine Clair, Art Director Laine Mednick Rutherford, Associate Editor Hal Sacks, Book Review Editor Sandy Goldberg, Account Executive Mark Hecht, Account Executive Marilyn Cerase, Subscription Manager Reba Karp, Editor Emeritus Miles Leon, President Stephanie Calliott, Secretary Harry Graber, Executive Vice-President The appearance of advertising in the Jewish News does not constitute a kashrut, political, product or service endorsement. The articles and letters appearing herein are not necessarily the opinion of this newspaper. © 2014 Jewish News. All rights reserved. Subscription: $18 year For subscription or change of address, call 757-965-6128 or email mcerase@ujft.org.
ly on aging bodies. Our exercise article, however, doesn’t delve into the medical pluses of keeping moving, but rather focuses on the fun of a group class at the Simon Family JCC. Give it a read, and then maybe join the class! Shelby Tudor of Tidewater Jewish Foundation offers some thoughts on
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financial planning, especially for those
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who are considering charitable bequests. According to her, it’s never too early to begin the process. Of course, there’s more to read about what we all are…aging! Think young and stay young and enjoy each day, Jewish News staff
16 | Jewish News | June 16, 2014 | Senior Living | jewishnewsva.org
About the cover: Zumba Gold class at Simon Family JCC. Photograph by Laine Mednick Rutherford
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Senior Living
There’s a party going on right here he scene outside the large group exercise room in the Simon Family JCC’s gym on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 11 am is quiet and generally serene. Members of all ages are concentrating on their weightlifting sets and getting heart healthy on the various cardiovascular machines. Inside Group Exercise Room 1, though, there’s a party going on. The music’s lively, the energy is high and a regular group of between 25 and 30 (mostly) senior citizens are working out with smiles on their faces, a bounce in their steps, and a professed devotion to
ly popular since they first were introduced in the United States over a decade ago. A combination of dance, aerobic and strength moves are demonstrated or called out by an instructor, and the class follows along as best it can. The music is upbeat and rhythmic and when paired with an experienced instructor and enthusiastic classmates, it’s nearly impossible to stay still for any of the 45-minute class. At a recent Tuesday class at the JCC, Giannelli played Latin and African themed music over the speakers –and even a country song—and directed the 25 seniors in the room to grapevine, merengue, flick kick, and salsa. “This is the most highly spirited class
their Zumba Gold class and their regular instructor, Sharon Giannelli. “This class is the most fun ever,” says Angie Aresco, 62, who’s been taking Zumba Gold since joining the JCC in February. “What’s really great is that no one’s any better than anyone else, and we all just love it.” Zumba classes have become increasing-
I’ve ever taken, anywhere,” says Libby Predmore, a class member whose trim body is a testament for continuing to work out, no matter what birthday is coming up next. “Sharon is a miracle who works magic, and we just leave here feeling so upbeat, and so positive.” In the front row of exercisers, Dorothy Zimmerman, a petite, spritely, and energet-
Article and photos by Laine Mednick Rutherford
T
Zumba Gold at the Simon Family JCC gym, for active seniors or those new to exercise
“It keeps me ic senior, puts her all into the young,” Goldberg movements and glistens—and says, smiling. grins—as she dances. While Giannelli “I’m on the JCC board and I gets credit from her started because I heard Sharon Tuesdays and students for being come talk to us about the class Thursdays, such a motivationat a meeting,” says Zimmerman. 11 – 11:45 am, al instructor, she “That was a year ago and I’ve Group Exercise says it’s the class been coming ever since—and Room 1 that deserves to be never want to miss it. admired by others. “We have people in this “If you want to see class who have lost weight, who have reduced their cholesterol, and what active seniors can look and feel like, who have made friends because they’re in then this is just the best place to see it,” says Giannelli, director of group exercise at the JCC. this healthy, social setting.” “The members who come keep me Women make up the majority of the class, but there are a handful of men who on my toes, they inspire me, and they’re are also regulars. Joe encouraging and supportive of each other.” Goldberg, 80, doesn’t skip a beat while fol- To find out more about Zumba Gold and lowing Giannelli’s other group classes at the JCC, appropriate for seniors or exercisers of all ages, visit www. instructions. “I come every Tuesday simonfamilyjcc.org/fitness-wellness. The Simon and Thursday,” Goldberg Family JCC is also a participant in the Silver says, “after I’ve taken two Sneakers program for senior citizens. For more Silver Sneakers earlier in information, visit www.simonfamilyjcc.org/silver-sneakers/ the morning.
jewishnewsva.org | Senior Living | June 16, 2014 | Jewish News | 17
Senior Living From the Department of Health & Human Services Administration on Aging
R
egular exercise is essential to healthy aging. It lowers risk factors linked to the development
of chronic disease, such as, obesity, high blood pressure, diabetes, and high levels of triglycerides. In turn, physical inactivity has been linked to the development of heart disease and stroke. The American Heart Association (AHA) cites physical inactivity as a major risk factor for developing coronary artery disease. The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) highlights regular physical activity as one of the most important steps to take to prevent serious health problems that can occur with age. Different activities lead to different health benefits. Some forms of exercise, such as strengthening exercises, improve flexibility and balance. Aerobic exercise increases cardiovascular fitness and endurance. Examples of aerobic activities include brisk walking, bicycling, jogging and dancing. CDC’s guidelines recommend that older adults 65+ who have no limiting health conditions participate in moderate-intense aerobic activities for at least two and a half hours every week. It also recommends including muscle-strengthening exercises, such as, lifting weights, working with resistance bands, heavy gardening, or yoga on two or more days every week. Strengthening exercises can increase a person’s flexibility and balance, which reduce the likelihood and severity of falls.
18 | Jewish News | June 16, 2014 | Senior Living | jewishnewsva.org
Senior Living
Planning for the future by Shelby Tudor
E
state planning is the process by which an individual or family arranges for the administration and transfer of assets in anticipation of their incapacitation or death. When contemplating such transfers, it has been said that every parent has one additional child to remember in his or her will: the Jewish community. A charitable bequest is perhaps the easiest way to ensure Jewish continuity. A charitable bequest may provide for a percentage of an estate or a specific dollar gift or specific asset(s) to be given to support the community. It may also be in the form of a gift of the remaining assets of an estate after other specific designations are made. Like other gifts, a charitable bequest can be designated for a wide range of purposes or given without restriction. Designating a bequest that creates a single fund at the Tidewater Jewish Foundation can provide annual support to community agencies as desired. Charitable bequests: • May be established through a will • May be in any amount • Provide an estate tax deduction if the estate is taxable • P rovide permanent resources to support organizations important to the individual. By deciding to leave a bequest in a will, a permanent legacy can be created. Gifts may be in the form of cash, securities or other estate property—and the estate will receive a tax deduction in the amount of the charitable bequest. Those who have already drafted their wills, can have their attorneys help arrange or change a charitable bequest with a simple amendment or codicil. An easy way of establishing a legacy is
Shelby Tudor
through the designation of retirement plan assets. Too often, the estate and income taxes imposed on these plans make them a poor choice for passing on to heirs. As charitable gifts, however, retirement plans can be powerful tools for endowing a charitable legacy to the community. By careful planning during one’s lifetime, a loving parent can give a sizeable gift to the community that could otherwise create a heavy tax burden on their heirs. These plans may also be used to create a testamentary charitable trust as part of a will with significant benefits to both heirs and the community. No one is ever too young to make plans for the future. Contact your attorney or financial professional for guidance on how best to ensure your legacy. A planned gift enables you to be present forever. You may also contact TJF for assistance and for a copy of the Wills Planner to aid in this process, www.jewishva.org.
jewishnewsva.org | Senior Living | June 16, 2014 | Jewish News | 19
Senior Living
Transitioning to an Assisted Living Facility: Suggestions for success by Laine Mednick Rutherford
in with family member, or downsize to
medications to end of life care.
Assisted Living Administrator of the Year.
S
where to live as they grow older.
high rises to converted mansions, pro-
at Beth Sholom Village, spoke with the
to an assisted living facility is before issues
If possible, and if they still want to,
vide services to seniors who still have
Jewish News and offers the following tips
start to arise in the seniors’ life. It’s better
seniors can remain in their homes, either
the ability to live fairly independently,
and suggestions for those considering a
to ask these questions too early, rather than
taking care of themselves, or having oth-
but need help with some of the aspects
transition. Guthrie has worked at Beth
too late.
ers—whether hired caregivers or friends
of daily living. That help can range
Sholom for more than 25 years and in
and family—helping out. They can move
from personal grooming to administering
2013 was named the Virginia Center for
smaller residences.
Seniors in Hampton Roads have a vari-
enior citizens—and their fam-
Another viable option is moving into
ety of choices when it comes to assisted
When is the right time to consider
ilies—have a lot to consider
an assisted living facility. These facilities,
living facilities. Pam Guthrie, administra-
a move?
when thinking about how and
which can vary from newly constructed
tor of The Terrace Assisted Living Center
The time to start thinking about moving
Ask the following questions while seniors are still active and capable:
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• When do you think it would be appropri-
• If it’s a married couple, when one
ate for you to move into a facility where
spouse is starting to endanger their
you can get the care you need?
own well-being in order to meet the needs of the other
• W hat do you think are the limitations
• A lso for couples, when the healthy
we should look for as signs that you
spouse starts to lose or neglect their
need to be living in a place that better
own social contacts
suits your needs? What are important factors to look for in Can you share some of the benefits of
an assisted living facility and how should
moving into an assisted living facility?
we proceed?
• Often, particularly in a facility with
• Get ratings and survey scores from
multiple levels of care, seniors are
each facility. The Department of
able to age in place.
Social Services for the city where the
• Seniors are with peers who have sim-
facility is located can provide these.
ilar physical limitations because of
• Find out about programming in the
the aging process, so they don’t feel
facility, as well as opportunities for
the constant need to compete, or to
seniors to enjoy activities away from
compensate.
the facility.
• No more worrying about grocery
• Cleanliness and conditions of the
shopping, or meal planning, or caring
facility are important for comfortable
for a house.
living.
• R ather than focusing energy on trying to ensure others that help
• See if residents look engaged and happy.
is unnecessary, seniors can enjoy
• When looking at staffing statistics,
living—with caring and qualified
pay attention to staff longevity. A
people to help them.
facility that has a lower turnover of
• Socialization, if desired.
staff indicates employees like where
• Privacy, when desired.
they work, and what they’re doing. • Facilities that offer a variety of level
Are there ways to tell if a senior needs t
of care within the assisted living reg-
o consider moving now?
ulations mean fewer transitions when
A brief checklist of signs that you, or some-
additional care becomes essential.
one you know, could be helped by a move into an assisted living facility:
• Get brochures, look at floor plans, find out about pricing and seek out
• Frequent emergency room visits
information about a variety of facili-
• Increasing forgetfulness
ties, but when it’s time to visit, only
• Staying in more than you’re going
choose a few of them. Too many
out/lack of social interaction • Avoidance of questions • A decline in personal appearance, hygiene, or housekeeping
visits can result in confusion and frustration. • Choose the facility that best meets your, or your loved one’s, needs.
• Excuses
jewishnewsva.org | Senior Living | June 16, 2014 | Jewish News | 21
Marilyn Moranha and the Senior Club at the JCC
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22 | Jewish News | June 16, 2014 | Senior Living | jewishnewsva.org
T
he Mary and Avalon S. Krukin Award for Senior Adults was presented to Marilyn Moranha at the Simon Family JCC’s annual meeting on Monday, May 19. Morhana received the award because of the time and energy she devotes to the seniors at the JCC. This is her sixth year serving as president of the Seniors Club, and prior to that, she held the position of treasurer for several years. As president, Moranha conducts all business and news in the beginning of each monthly meeting, saving the lighter fare such as joke time or entertainment for the end of the hour. This month she has lined up a master gardener to speak and will bring a country singer in for July. Moranha is very visible at the JCC each week between the Senior Current Events Club, mahjong, and the Senior Club. “The Seniors need to feel that they are a part of a being at the JCC,” she says. “We go on trips, we see shows and it’s all very socially engaging for us.”
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jewishnewsva.org | Senior Living | June 16, 2014 | Jewish News | 23
Senior Living
Bashert: Kitty and Abbott Saks’ 60-year love story
Kitty and Abbott Saks. Article and Photos by Laine Mednick Rutherford
S
he went to the Jewish social for teens and young adults in Norfolk with a date. He hadn’t wanted to go at all, but reluctantly agreed at the urging of friends. What happened to 17-year-old Kitty Friedenbach and 18-year-old Abbott Saks on the night of January 26, 1950 at the United Orthodox Synagogue in Norfolk (now B’Nai Israel Congregation) was, in Kitty’s words, bashert. A Yiddish word, bashert broadly means destiny, and often is used when speaking about something that predestined, that is meant to be. On that night, at that social, destiny stepped in, bearing the name of Harvey Saks* (of blessed memory), Abbott’s younger brother and a classmate of Kitty’s. The details of their first meeting remain vivid to Kitty (Friedenbach) Saks. “Harvey said to me, ‘Kitty, my brother’s here. He’s interested in languages,” the spritely Norfolk resident says. “I said, ‘Harvey, I can’t. I’m on a date.’ He didn’t listen to me. He took me by the hand and dragged me to Abbott.” Handsome, studious Abbott Saks was
leaning against the entrance to the party, looking and feeling uninterested. A freshman at the Old Dominion Campus of William & Mary studying Spanish, Saks wasn’t expecting to meet anyone that evening, certainly not the lovely, feisty, bright-eyed Viennese girl whose family had moved to Norfolk two years previously, after years struggling to survive the Holocaust. As Harvey introduced them and told Abbott that Kitty spoke several languages, Abbott says he woke up. He chatted with Kitty for a while and was intrigued, or in Abbott’s parlance—he’s a master at wordplay, a genius at remembering quotes and quick to provide levity—he was “smitten with the kitten.” “I was fascinated by the fluency of her English after only two years here,” Abbott says. “And she wasn’t a bad looker either.” Kitty remembers Abbott repeatedly saying, “That’s remarkable,” and not seeming so anxious to leave the social any longer. She, though, politely told him goodnight, and went to find her date, who had seen some of what transpired.
24 | Jewish News | June 16, 2014 | Senior Living | jewishnewsva.org
“’Tu t’ais amourer a chez de lui,’ he told me—you flipped over him, didn’t you?” says Kitty. “’I said, how could I? I just met the guy.’ But I had flipped. It was love at first sight.” When Kitty got home that night, she woke her mother up, and in German told her, “Now. I’ve met somebody.” The next day, after classes were over at Old Dominion, arms laden with a stack of school books, Abbott went to the store Kitty’s parents owned on Church Street, three blocks away from the store that his family owned on the same Norfolk street. He introduced himself to her parents, and the rest, as Kitty would say, is bashert. On May 30, 1954, the pair married at B’nai Israel. After a three-day honeymoon in New York, Abbott departed for Army duty as an MP, stationed in Berlin. Kitty didn’t like the thought of them living apart, so she booked passage on the S.S. United States and soon joined him there. “It was difficult going back,” Kitty says. “His barracks were former SS headquarters and that’s where I spent most of my days. Every morning, before he left, Abbott warmed me, ‘Kitty, don’t get into any fights today.’ And I did try, mostly, to stay out of trouble.” After a year in Germany, the couple returned to Norfolk, where Abbott began teaching Spanish in Norfolk Public Schools and Kitty established their home. Within a few years, they had two children: David and Tonie. In the decades that followed, Abbott became a popular Spanish professor at Old Dominion University, eventually earning the honored distinction of teaching there for 50 years. Kitty devoted herself to her children and became an integral member of the Holocaust Commission of the United Jewish Federation of Tidewater’s Speakers’ Bureau. Her Holocaust survival story, which she has shared with thousands, if not
An accomplished educator and poet, Abbott Saks reads a poem he wrote to Kitty in honor of their 25th wedding anniversary, 35 years previously.
Kitty By Abbott Saks Written on the occasion of their 25th wedding anniversary
From the world of waltz by fire swept That ancient faith from ashes kept Our paths entwined right from the start I took her hand she took my heart; Green eye were shy yet did they gleam Dared I to hope, dared I to dream? The sea was calling years ago I knew I could not let her go Beyond Horizons lay great charms I held life’s prize within my arms The ships have sailed, more will depart I have her hand she has my heart.
Senior Living
98
BRITH SHOLOM A Jewish social / philanthropic club for men and women that meets and socializes at Beth Sholom Village, Brith Sholom is celebrating 98 years in Hampton Roads!
For membership information, call Gail at 757-461-1150 or Brith.Sholom1@gmail.com
The Saks’ share their treasured keepsakes, including an autograph book with signatures of Norfolk Tars players, Kitty’s high school photo and the Saks’ on their wedding day in 1954.
tens of thousands over the years, is now preserved on film in the innovative Holocaust Commission documentary and educational program, What We Carry. With the love and support of their A photo of Kitty and Abbott Saks when they were first dating, Abbott Saks was ordered to Berlin as an children, Tonie and taken at the old Ocean View MP immediately after the pair wed. Kitty moved to Berlin soon after. Frank Wilkins, Amusement Park in Norfolk. David and Mary Lou Saks, and their grandsons Elliot and ‘Man is not really complete unless he marAdam Saks, Kitty and Abbott recently ries. And then, he’s completely finished.’” Kitty heartily laughs at this, and many celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary. When considering the secrets of their of Abbott’s jokes and witticisms. She consuccessful relationship and long lasting love tinues to listen to his astute observations story, the couple shares insight, inspiration, and pays attention to his continued zeal for learning. Abbott speaks lovingly and heartfelt emotion, and splashes of humor. “You can’t hold everything in, you have proudly about Kitty—her cooking experto discuss things together,” says Kitty. tise, the inspiration she provided for many “You must be able to converse, and never, of the hundreds of poems he’s written NEVER, go to bed angry. And, you must during their years together, and the full life they’ve shared together. be friends first.” “I’d be nothing without this woman. “And forever,” adds Abbott, completing She’s responsible for all that we are, plain Kitty’s statement. Lightening the mood, his eyes twin- and simple,” says Abbott. “We’re responsible for each other,” says kling with a still-boyish mischievousness, Abbott says, “Always give in when you Kitty. know you’re right. And like God says,
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jewishnewsva.org | Senior Living | June 16, 2014 | Jewish News | 25
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sentara.com/knowyourrisk | Your community, not-for-profit health partner 26 | Jewish News | June 16, 2014 | Senior Living | jewishnewsva.org