8 minute read
Jane Shaw
Columnist
Jane Shaw
The Elmfield Institute
What Does it Mean to be Well?
The new year often means plans for a new you, new resolutions for your health and wellbeing. But what does it actually mean to be well? What is health? Does it mean physical, emotional, or mental wellbeing?
Here at Elmfield we have a large chalk board asking the question What does it mean for you to be well?, inviting responses from all our visitors. Business executives, wellness retreat guests, children, parents and grandparents all contribute, leaving words such as “connection”, “no pain”, “agency”, “freedom”, “having time with my dog”, or “time to dance”. These answers speak to the growing awareness of a bio-psycho-social model of health – the idea that the disciplines of biology, psychology and sociology interconnect in the study of health and disease.
We want physical wellbeing but also need emotional and community wellbeing. Human beings are complex interconnected systems so it helps to be aware of what supports us to feel well and the parts that connect to form the whole. Incidentally, the etymology of the word health is whole, meaning not divided into parts.
Dr. Dan Siegel (2012), a pioneer in mental health, talks about the importance of interpersonal neurobiology in wellbeing. His theory holds that our brains are constantly being rewired through our relationships with others. In other words, we are all connected to each other through our nervous systems and thus are affected by our social environment. His works tells us that social pain is coded in the brain in a similar way to physical pain. Healthy relationships are important for our wellbeing, whether at home or at work. To my mind, a healthy business has healthy relationships.
It is hard to be well in isolation of others. The research of psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Stephen Porges (2020) also supports the notion that our wellbeing is supported by our ability to co-regulate with others. The pandemic has added to the collective and individual pain body due to lack of social connection, the fear of getting ill, and increased financial pressures. Not only do we have many extra stresses, but we have lost one of the biggest ways humans regulate – connecting with each other. Porges reminds us that without the resources of co-regulation we are vulnerable to adaptive defensive states. We are more likely to get angry, anxious, or aggressive inappropriately when we don’t have others around us to regulate us, at a neurophysiological level.
If health and wholeness are one and the same, how can we find more wholeness in our lives. What does wholeness in our lives mean? Physician and trauma expert Dr. Gabor Maté (2003), whose Compassionate Enquiry practice evolved out of working for many years in Vancouver’s Downtown Eastside with people challenged by severe drug addiction, describes health as an ability to be with pain. In other words, from his perspective, being well is a capacity to hold our pain in relationship to the whole of our lives. The pain he refers to is physical, emotional, or social.
To my mind Maté’s perspective gives us more choice over our wellbeing. If we have the capacity to be not-okay, then it allows us to have more compassion towards ourselves and others. This then strengthens our ability to be in regulated relationship with others, causing a positive feedback loop for our wellbeing.
The next time you feel overwhelmed and consumed by the thing that hurts, can you widen your perception to see the bigger picture? Can you see an image of wholeness? Can we see what is working for us? This helps us to be less defined by our pain. That is not to say we push the pain away, rather we see it in relationship to the rest of us and our surroundings. Conscious awareness of the big picture and of what makes us healthy gives us more choice over what is means to be well for ourselves. Each of us will have a different preference and emphasis on the physical, emotional or social aspects of our wellbeing. We are individuals making up a whole society and difference is important.
For me, being well is being able to connect to love, compassion and kindness, no matter how painful is my physical, emotional, or environmental state. What is the one thing you can do this year to support your wellbeing? Maybe it is simply a different perspective.
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JAN 22
17 Jan GDPR & Cyber SecurityJan GDPR & Cyber Security 18 Jan Report WritingJan Report Writing 19 Jan Interview Skills for the Interviewer 20 Jan Difficult Conversations 24 Jan LinkedIn 25 Jan Finance for Non-Financial Mgrs 25 Jan Effective Communication 26 Jan Managing Change 27 Jan Developing Confidence 28 Jan Talent Management
FEB 22
02 Feb Proofreading 03 Feb Professional Selling Skills 04 Feb MS Word Accessibility 07 Feb Resilience and Wellbeing 08 Feb Presentation Skills 09 Feb Whistleblowing 10 Feb Leadership Skills 10 Feb Facilitation Skills 11 Feb Competency Based Interview Skills 14 Feb Adobe Acrobat Pro 14 Feb PRINCE2 Accredited 15 Feb Sage Cloud Accounting 16 Feb Creating Video on your Mobile 16 Feb MS Project 17 Feb Storytelling in Business 21 Feb Minute Taking 22 Feb PA Development 22 Feb Xero Cloud Accounting 23 Feb Design for Non-Designers using Canva 24 Feb MS Excel Intermediate 25 Feb Conducting Investigations 28 Feb Fundamentals of Digital Marketing & Social Media 28 Feb Personal Effectiveness
Feb Professional Selling Skills
Feb MS Word Accessibility
Feb Resilience and Wellbeing
Feb Presentation Skills 09 Feb Whistleblowing 10 Feb Leadership Skills 10 Feb Facilitation Skills 11 Feb Competency Based Interview Skills 14 Feb Adobe Acrobat Pro 14 Feb PRINCE2 Accredited 22 Feb Xero Cloud Accounting 23 Feb Design for Non-Designers using Canva
Feb MS Excel Intermediate Marketing & Social Media 28 Feb Personal Effectiveness
MAR 22
01 Mar Manager as a Coach 02 02 Mar Mailchimp Email MarketingMar Mailchimp Email Marketing 03 Mar Adobe InDesign Adobe InDesign 07 Mar HR Fundamentals HR Fundamentals 08 Mar Emotional Intelligence 09 Mar Introduction to Project Mgt 10 Mar LinkedIn 11 Mar Equality and Diversity in the Workplace 14 Mar Assertiveness Skills 15 Mar Mentoring Skills 21 21 Mar Scrum Master IntroductionMar Scrum Master Introduction 22 22 Mar Leading ChangeMar Leading Change 22 22 Mar ProofreadingMar Proofreading 23 Mar High Performing Teams 24 Mar MS PowerPoint 25 25 Mar Influencing & NegotiationMar Influencing & Negotiation 28 28 Mar Challenging Unconscious Bias Mar Challenging Unconscious Bias 29 29 Mar Introduction to Scrum MasterMar Introduction to Scrum Master 30 Mar People Management 31 Mar Difficult Conversations
APR 22
05 Apr Mastering MS Teams 05 Apr Report WritingApr 06 Apr Meetings MasterclassApr Meetings Masterclass 06 06 Apr Finance for Non-Financial MgrsApr Finance for Non-Financial Mgrs 07 Apr MS Word Advanced 07 Apr Credit Management 12 Apr MS Word Intermediate 21 Apr Practical Risk Management 26 Apr Tender Writing 26 Apr Developing Confidence 27 27 Apr Presentation SkillsApr Presentation Skills 27 27 Apr Supervisory & Management SkillsApr Supervisory & Management Skills 28 28 Apr Time Management Apr Time Management 28 Apr MS Excel Advanced
MAY 22
03 May Fraud and Cyber Awareness 03 May PA Development Advanced 04 May Customer Service 04 May Resilience and Wellbeing 05 May Hootsuite 05 May Minute Taking 06 May Drafting Tender Documents 09 May Interview Skills for the Interviewer 10 May Managing Conflict 10 May Business Continuity Planning 11 May PA Development 11 May Fundamentals of Digital Marketing & Social Media 12 May Effective Communication 12 May Managing Change
May Fraud and Cyber Awareness
May PA Development Advanced
May Resilience and Wellbeing
May Hootsuite 05 May Minute Taking Interview Skills for the Interviewer
JUN 22
01 Jun MS PowerPoint 02 Jun Storytelling in Business 03 Jun MS Word Advanced 07 Jun Design for Non-Designers using Canva 07 07 Jun HR Fundamentals Jun HR Fundamentals 08 08 Jun Adobe Acrobat Jun Adobe Acrobat 08 Jun Emotional Intelligence 09 Jun Sage Cloud Accounting 09 09 Jun Manager as a Coach Jun Manager as a Coach 14 14 Jun Creating Video on your Mobile Jun Creating Video on your Mobile 14 14 Jun MS Project Jun MS Project 15 Jun MS Excel Intermediate 15 Jun Professional Selling Skills 16 Jun People Management 16 Jun Assertiveness Skills 21 Jun Introduction to Project Mgt 21 Jun Proofreading 22 Jun Mailchimp Email Marketing 22 22 Jun Conducting Investigations Jun Conducting Investigations 23 23 Jun Mentoring Skills Jun Mentoring Skills 23 23 Jun Competency Based Interview Skills Jun Competency Based Interview Skills 24 Jun Influencing & Negotiation 27 Jun High Performing Teams 28 28 Jun MS Excel Advanced Jun MS Excel Advanced 28 & 29 28 & 29 Jun Adobe InDesign Jun Adobe InDesign
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