COLUMN COLUMN / LIFE & TIMES
Kathy Clugston Kathy Clugston is a freelance radio presenter. She chairs the long-running BBC Radio 4 programme ‘Gardeners’ Question Time’ and presents the weekly entertainment show ‘The Ticket’ on BBC Radio Ulster.
NOT-SO-TOTAL RECALL
This month, Kathy Clugston reflects on how the brain can play tricks with your memory.
I don’t know if it’s a scientific fact that the older you get the further back you can remember - the distant past coming into focus while recent events take on a distinctly hazy hue - but anecdotal evidence would suggest this is the case. Older people I know can remember the sting of a childhood rebuke or the taste of a seaside holiday treat with pin-sharp clarity, while they have no idea what they watched on TV last night or who they were talking to on the phone a mere five minutes ago. Now that I have reached un certain age I too notice my memory playing tricks on me, and it was never that great in the first place. Like many of you no doubt I often forget the names of people I know and can no longer bring to mind the names of those I don’t - that actor from that thing with yer woman, you know… oh, I can see his face! Slim are the chances of me walking into a room and heading straight for the thing I am looking for, or remembering how many MLAs there are, or what the capital of Mozambique is, no matter how many times I look them up. (I’ll save you the trouble: 90 and Maputo.) A certain amount of this I ascribe to meeting lots of new people every week in the course of my work. I think of my brain as a folder on my computer; it can only hold so much data before it has to start deleting files which, while helpful for social intercourse, are not necessary for survival. However, I do scare myself sometimes. Not long ago in Portrush a woman came hurtling over to me. “Kathy! Halloooo!! How are you?” I had no inkling who this woman was, and we were outside so she wasn’t even wearing a mask. In these instances, there is about a second where you might be able to say “I’m so sorry, I just can’t place you…” or a well-trained friend might immediately step forward proffering a hand and bellowing “Hello, I’m Frank. And you are?” But I was alone, and felt that second whizz by. I arranged my face into a delighted smile and had a short,
Illustration by Caolan Teague.
unsatisfactory conversation with this woman, berating myself all the while for not fessing up and finding out who on earth she was. On the other hand, I think we have to help each other out a bit here. I rarely go unrecognised, mask or no mask, by virtue of being six feet tall and having a white streak in the front of my hair (all natural, before you ask), but if I meet someone I don’t know that well, I try to mention my name and how they might know me. I love it when people do this to me, especially if they’ve lost/gained/ changed weight/hair/glasses sense since the one time I met them three years ago at a party after a few babychams. You can shriek “Well of COURSE it’s you, Mike!” as if you knew all along, and everyone’s a winner. Mind you, I’m not sure I want my distant memory restored. Recently, out of the blue, I suddenly remembered a lad at primary
school being taunted and having his glasses knocked off by some other boys. I’ve not so much as thought about this lad for 40-odd years, but his name and face, contorted with trying not to cry, leapt into my mind unbidden, swiftly followed by the realisation that to have this memory I must have witnessed the event. Did I intervene? Pick up his glasses? Berate the bullies? I couldn’t remember. My body went cold with the realisation that I had more than likely just stood there and watched. The shame of it made me cry, like an eejit, in the middle of Ormeau Park. I’ve searched online and there are a number of people with his name. None of the photos look like the boy I remember though. Who knows what tricks the memory plays? I hope that wherever and whoever he is now, he’s doing OK.
THIS MONTH’S OBSESSIONS: Women Vs Hollywood – Helen O’Hara’s book about the history of women in the film industry. Helen is our film reviewer on The Ticket but I’m not doing her any favours, the book and the accompanying podcast are terrific.
Pickled red onion - My friend Carmel served this with some curry and it was the highlight of the meal. It’s really simple, just some slices of red onion left to marinade for 30 - 60 minutes in lemon or lime juice.
Herbal tea cocktails - Use up your less favoured herbal teas by double-bagging them with others. I’m currently having ‘Night time’ and ‘Detox’ together - yes, in one cup! It’s a revelation.
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