Two Beloved Retiring Teachers Also Embody Effective Parenting

Two Beloved Retiring Teachers Also Embody Effective Parenting

By Tom Northrup

It’s never a good idea to fall asleep at the wheel—especially when you’re negotiating hairpin turns on Route 50 in eastern West Virginia.

That’s what I did when I was 17, driving to Pottstown, Pennsylvania with my father. Fortunately, he observed that I was a little bit slow coming out of the turns for the previous ten minutes or so. I recall awakening as Dad was straightening the wheel. He suggested I pull over, and he would take the reins. No panic, no recriminations. He had trained as a glider pilot in World War II. While my father died in 2005, only recently did one of my brothers suggest that the four of us should compile a list of “Dadisms”—his short, pithy principles which guided our development as children and as adults.

Despite the range of our ages—a span of eighteen years from oldest (me) to youngest—we have consistent and vivid memories of them. A few of the 25 or 30:

• “When you don’t care where you are going, any road will do.”

• “Don’t eat the soup as hot as it’s cooked.”

• “Eye on the target and follow through.”

• “That’s a nothing play.” (My favorite, used to describe some of my pursuits that offered significant risk with no apparent reward.)

Neither he nor my mother ever lectured us. They provided a structure (nightly family dinner, regular bedtimes and expectations, respectful to all, honor commitments) which we understood.

What my brothers and I most appreciated was the latitude they gave us to learn from our mistakes and their faith that we would. They listened and watched, and were always available if we asked for their counsel. That rarely happened when I was a child, but more often in my adulthood.

Recently retired Hill School teachers Sydney and Jack Bowers were honored on May 12 at the school for their teaching excellence and service. Collectively, they had taught for 86 years (Sydney 44, Jack 42) at Hill. A few hundred former and current students, parents, friends and colleagues attended the ceremony and many others wrote to express their appreciation.

The culture Sydney and Jack created in their “classrooms” (Sydney— athletic fields and courts; Jack—8th Grade homeroom and math) was rooted in the conditions for every child to thrive. Their expectations and structure (kindness and respect for all; don’t compare yourself to others—seek your own personal best; embrace mistakes and learn from them) were reinforced daily.

Creating a sense of belonging and connection to the group was their priority for each child; achievement and ongoing growth would naturally follow.

Parenting is a humbling experience and we are fortunate beyond expression when our children have teachers like Jack and Sydney. They become our teachers too. The two of them embodied the best of teaching, as in many ways did my parents. We parents sometimes come to our lessons slowly, and sometimes we rescue our children unnecessarily, denying them an opportunity for growth.

But it’s always wise to step forward when your child might be going off a cliff. Sometimes literally, especially on Route 50 in eastern West Virginia.