‘Man’s Best Friend’

Molly Penney

‘Oh keep the dog far hence, that’s friend to men, Or with his nails he’ll dig it up again!’ T.S. Eliot

Take him to the nail bar down the village next to the butchers Watch him stroll towards the window and watch as cows hang upside down Their blood feeding the weeds and dirt

Take him to the nail bar and sharpen his claws Tell them they must get it right, do a good job Tell the dog to sit up straight and still

Floss, strip the bones from his teeth Drag the intestines from his stomach half unrecognisable Make sure they make his nails look presentable

He will get restless as all dogs do I’m sure But there’s plenty of women there to fuss and pet him Keep him company while he’s waiting for the paint to dry

Tell them to close the windows and face the wall Well we can’t have him running off to the butchers next door His bloodlust is uncontrollable, I don’t know where you found this dog!

I did say creatures like that couldn’t care less about death They have felt much worse than a pin prick on the temple Or a bullet in the head

He is in the garden again looking for his friends Dig there’s his toe Dig there’s his ear

He must be an orphan spat out from the mud A dreadful ugly thing scared of nothing but fireworks And wet socks