Short Story - The Runaround

Use Locally - Issue 83 March 2020 Excuse me, is this your car?” Barron asked the silver-haired lady leaving the opticians laden with a large parcel. “It just so happens that I’m looking for a reliable runaround for my daughter.” “Lucky girl!” The lady smiled warmly, putting the parcel on the back seat. “Would you like to have a look at it at some time?” Barron had been strolling down the high street when he noticed the ‘For Sale’ sign taped to the bonnet. He’d bought and sold enough motors to know the asking price was a fraction of what this car was worth. “How about now?” He didn’t actually have a daughter but knew all the tricks to get his hands on a bargain. “Is there anything wrong with it?” he asked suspiciously. The car seemed immaculate inside and out. “I have to be honest,” the lady grimaced, “it does have one very annoying fault. It makes a dreadful beeping sound when I’m driving,” she said apologetically. “Have you taken it back to the dealership?” He frowned. “They said there’s nothing wrong with it.” She shrugged. “They said the only way to stop it beeping is to put my seatbelt on.” Barron rubbed his chin. “I might be willing to overlook it if the price is right.” “Perhaps a test drive would help?” she suggested optimistically. “Are you free now?” Barron pounced. “How about I drive you home and we can go over the paperwork?” “I suppose so!” The lady seemed surprised. “If you’re genuinely interested?” “Perfect!” Indeed it did seem almost too perfect. With a great display of chivalry, Barron helped the lady into the passenger seat. He adjusted the mirror and turned on the ignition. The engine purred like a kitten. “Seatbelts on!” he said cordially. “Before the car starts beeping.” “Very wise,” the lady said. “It really is most annoying.” “I’ll get my man to look at it,” he said, and pulled away. “Though I imagine it will be FRVWO\WR¾[:KHUHDUHZH heading?” “I live at the end of Barrow Common,” she said. “Do you know it?” ²,µPVXUH,FDQ¾QGLW³%DUURQ said. The ten-minute drive was most enjoyable as he contemplated how he was going to knock a few more pounds off the asking price. “What do you think?” the lady asked, as they pulled up outside her house. “Would she like it?” Barron was about to agree that his imaginary daughter would like it, when he noticed a young man coming out of the house. “Mum you’ve done it again, haven’t you?” the man said. “You can’t keep conning people into driving you home.” “But I’ve taken my driving glasses in for repair,” the lady said, retrieving her parcel from the back seat. “How else was I going to get this home?” “What?” Barron was taken aback. “So isn’t the car for sale after all?” “Sorry mate,” the man said, “she’s given you the runaround.” “Thank you for the lift, very kind.” She smiled. “There’s a bus stop just up the road.” By Jackie Brewster The Runaround

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