A Bad Day for Minnie Mouse

DAWN J. WILSON

A Bad Day for Minnie Mouse

It started out so well, dating a celebrity and being in the red carpet spotlight. She was idolized by young and old and oh-so polka-dot charming.

But she always hated her lack of breasts, her coy giggles, the sensible pumps, and the white gloves of necessary propriety.

But, that's what it took to be drawn on his arm. So, the three-drink lunch became the three-bottle day and the Prozac quit working.

When she found that yellow box with the good housekeeping seal of approval, satisfaction guaranteed, or your money back, and definitely toxic,

she mixed it into a batter and baked cupcakes with pink icing and a cherry on top of each and every one.

Then ate them all.

She made it to the bathroom just in time to lose her ink, her vinyl record ears holding her above the bowl. Always dainty, she didn't spill a drop, less mess to erase later.