Disassociation and Abuse

Disassociation and Abuse

Meagan Roach

I look forward to work daily Because outside of here ...

-As a cashier I have conversations. They will always smile, They will always laugh, At my jokes They will always ask, How "I" am doing. They sometimes return To my aisle. They sometimes appreciate How hard I try for them. Sometimes they even say Thank you They rarely remember My name, Instead They glance at my badge.

I look forward to work daily desperate for human contact That emotion that makes me Feel like I'm Ali-ve. It always feels so real, so genuine Sometimes, people are mad Because I childishly smile, Everyday, in the same way.

I look forward to work daily, Because I am happy here, Outside of here ... Rarely, they will recognize me When I'm not in uniform.

I don't mind, I understand, My heart knows

I'm afraid of trusting others

I'm afraid ... It might not be real when I look - forward to work daily, Convincing myself it is.