Investigation

By Khloe’ Fox Staff Writer

For the second year in a row, the boys at our school got to enjoy Boys Night Out, where they spent hours hanging out with their friends and playing basketball, video games, and glowin-the-dark dodgeball. It was never a surprise to hear Bishop Luther Baker’s voice on the announcements ranting and raving on and on about the main attractions that the boys wouldn’t want to miss. I was always amused at the overflowing amount of enthusiasm; I just couldn’t believe that this boy’s event was the end all, be all...until I walked past the larger than life posters (that nobody could miss) showcasing activities any boy (or girl) would enjoy doing. Each time I passed a poster the same question kept popping into my mind: “When were the girls going to get one?”

I just couldn’t shake the feeling of being left out. I wanted the same dedication that the boys got from Bishop Baker, the same daily announcements that exuded excitement. I wanted the bright posters that boasted to everyone who passed by. Finally, my question was answered and the date was set for Girls Day In. Finally, the girls would get the same opportunity as the boys to bounce off the walls. I was ecstatic, assuming that the girls would be given the same

treatment—until it didn’t turn out like that.

It all started with a google form sent out by Linda Pritchard, A Plus coordinator and one of the organizers of Girls Day In, asking girls if they would attend an event designed for them and what activities they would want to do. Once I replied, I felt a small bit of excitement, and waited for the daily announcements that raved about the fun attractions. They never happened. Walking around the school, I expected to see giant colorful posters, and instead there were the typical small 8.5 x 11” paper with only two colors: pink and purple. Now, I have no problem with these colors, in fact, purple is my favorite color. However, those colors overly feminized an event we already knew was for girls and represents something different from the action-packed boys event. In contrast, the Boys Night Out posters were huge and there was no way you could miss them. I literally had to strain my neck to catch a glimpse of the tiny Girls Day In posters. Of course, the event was easily forgotten. This supposedly unforgettable day filled with bonding and entertainment with the girls took place on Thursday of finals week as opposed to Friday, which was the day of the boys’ event and took away some of the enjoyment, since my mind was unable to relax in the middle of finalsinduced stress.

The day finally arrived for the first Girls Day In, where my friends and I supposedly would laugh and enjoy ourselves. However, most of my friends weren’t going. In fact, hardly anybody was going. Folake Adewale, sophomore, and I walked into the auditorium to see about eight seats filled. It was then that reality set in that Girls Day In was not going to meet my expectations.

There was no basketball, no video games, no glow-in-the-dark dodgeball. The girls were going to sessions dedicated to “finding the princess within,” self defense and car mechanics, wrapping up the day with an art project. The only session that got a pass from me was the one on self defense. All the others struck out and the art project was anti-climatic. Throughout the day, Mikesa Hatten, a freshman I befriended, and I discussed how we felt indifferent about the activities and we preferred to do the sort of activities the boys were offered.

Upon reflection, I somewhat enjoyed myself, but something about the day kept bugging me. It was the inequality between the two events. Now, it isn’t as big as fighting for the right to vote, but again, it is the prejudicial quality of the differences. I don’t mind learning about healthy relationships because that is valuable information; however, during Boys Night Out, the boys certainly weren’t given a mirror and a crown to find their prince within. Pretty sure they didn’t review different examples of unhealthy relationships, either. I am not just nitpicking; even Pritchard agreed with me by saying, “[The boys] should definitely learn about healthy relationships as well because you can’t teach girls about certain things that make a relationship healthy and the boys don’t receive the same information.”

Even the names chosen for these events were subtly sexist. The first thing that comes to mind when you hear “Girls Day In” are housewives couped up at home cooking, cleaning and caring for children, while their husbands enjoy a lively night out on the town. However intentional or not intentional, the two events were set up to play into gender norms from the start, which is inherently unfair to everyone.

Did the boys learn how to check their tires? No. Were they taught about the essentials that need to be kept in their cars? No. The boys’ day was decidedly different and ended with a fast-paced and competitive game of glow-in-thedark dodgeball. I ended the day painting the U. City symbol for my mom. There’s nothing wrong with painting—I liked the time I used to reconnect with a friend I haven’t seen for a while. It was just that I expected something better and less feminized. Overall, I enjoyed the girls I met and spent time with at Girls Day In and hope the next one is better and that this is just the first of many to come.

Next time, let’s look at the offerings a little more closely. Let the girls event become just as exciting as the boys. We need activities to rival the boys’ event. Let’s catch up to the 21st century idea of a woman. Let’s try to avoid doing it to ourselves, which Pritchard and the other facilitators of Girls Day In did—with no harmful intent. An attempt of inclusion goes to waste when you’re doing more harm than good.

Procrastination prevents people from living their best lives

By Zion Smith Staff Writer

It seems like the more you want something in life; the harder it is to achieve. This can apply to wanting all A’s for a semester, or wanting to exercise, or even just wanting to become more extroverted. The more we fantasize these sort of things, the more we procrastinate about accomplishing them. Winning your inner creative battles is something everyone has to deal with. It feels like there is a psychological force working against you, every single moment of your life, and it is involved in every decision you make, whether you know it or not.

This psychological phenomenon prevents you from maturing, and becoming a better version of yourself. We call this force “resistance.” Whether we all know this as resistance, we’ve all felt resistance stopping us from accomplishing what would be in our best interest. Resistance is often hard to delineate, although it is often described as the physical discomfort we receive from the idea of doing something productive. Your body starts to tense up, you start to wince at the thought of doing something more uncomfortable than what you’re currently doing. Whether it’s going for the run you’ve been saying you want to go on for the past week, or starting the essay you’ve been putting off, resistance will be there to rear its ugly head. This is because resistance prevents progression, which itself is intriguing because once you start to actually do it, you get this rewarding sense of accomplishment and you feel fulfilled in yourself. But in that moment—when your wasting time doing nothing progressive for yourself—doing what you should feels like a monster, there is resistance.

If no one ever experienced resistance, everyone would be living according to their highest ideals. If we knew it was in our best interest to write a book, we’d just start writing it. If we knew it was in our best interest to prep for track ahead of time by going on daily runs, we’d just do the daily cardio. Whenever we thought about doing something for

our own personal benefit—or for the betterment of your mind—we’d do it, without any resistance to second guess ourselves.

And with most of us clinging onto the idea of staying intellectually consistent, resistance will manifest into a form of rationalization. This rationalization only serves the purpose of creating negotiations with your inner self. You need any sort of reason to not do what you know you probably should.

It seems that the more important something is for your growth and betterment, the stronger the resistance you will experience. You always hear stories about the famous singers, performers, and comedians who still get really nervous before they go on stage. They encounter resistance, even though they’ve been doing it for decades. So what’s their response? Do they just not go on stage? Of course not, because their careers would be over. But what they do instead is to learn to break through resistance right after it presents itself, and the better you get at doing this—the better you get at doing the right thing—rather than the comfortable thing. Because when you just sit down to write, or when you just put on the running shoes, or begin to record. Something magical happens. Words start to flow, endorphins start to run, inspiration starts to magically descent upon you. And all the pieces begin to come together.

The one and true response to resistance is to just start the thing. Once you realize whatever rationalizations you have for not doing the thing you know you have to do, it’s just resistance. You can gain the mental clarity to just do the thing, and as you become more familiar with resistance and seeing it for what it is, you can use resistance as a guide. It’s a great compass, leading you to where you know you need to go. As you win these battles with resistance, day by day, month by month, year by year, the life you live will become bigger than the unlived life within you, and you’ll eventually start living the kind of life you’ve always wanted.

2019-2020 U-Times Staff Co-Editor: Eliot Fuller Co-Editor: Ian Feld Web Editor: Grace Klein Staff Writers/Photographers: Charya Young Zion Smith Tarren Harris Khloe’ Fox Marley Gardner Kiya Furlow Jalyn Ware Sasha Albright Adviser: Mrs. Mary Williams

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