Through a Mother’s Eyes

Sunset with a Purpose

BY DIANE CHEVELDAYOFF

If you have followed my past articles in Voice of Truth, you have learned of my family’s love for sunsets. We find such beauty and meaning in God’s nature, especially His sunsets, which show His magnificent glory uniquely every day. The sunset pictured here not only showcases God’s glory through nature, but it also reminds me of the new beginnings that God has orchestrated for our middle daughter.

As a mom in my season as the Mother of the Bride, I found yet another instance when God continues to teach us through life events. God repeatedly reminds me that He’s not done with me; I know I’ll keep learning and never arrive at a point of spiritual completeness on this side of heaven. Praise God that because He loves us so much, He continues to keep our best interest in the forefront—even when we don’t see it at the time! There are lessons in all experiences; we just need to pause our busy lives long enough to ask God to show us. As the Bible instructs in 2 Timothy 3:16, "All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right." (NLT)

Traditionally, weddings include a large family gathering at a time and place convenient for loved ones. However, for today’s younger generation, the day may be celebrated more intimately, perhaps by traveling to an exotic destination or timed with a much loved season—or, as in my daughter’s case—the sunset. But although wedding trends have changed and our children might desire a different wedding than we envisioned for them, the most important role we, as parents, have at this time of our children’s lives remains the same—to offer our love and support. While it’s natural to want to hold on to tradition, and it’s not always an easy process to accept change, seeing our child’s beaming smile is a joyous outcome for any parent.

Sometimes change requires that we let go in more ways than one. For me, letting go of my expectations for a traditional wedding for my daughter as she and her fiance chose to celebrate with a destination wedding was difficult. But letting go of my daughter and the type of relationship we had as she was growing up was also a very tough reality.

But, with God’s help, I achieved my conscious decision to support her unconditionally.

In both planning and executing the wedding day, God guided me to allow the engaged couple to make their own decisions, reminding me that our role as parents has and will continue to change. As our children grow, although we are still important influences, we are no longer responsible for controlling the outcome of our children’s lives and choices. Some people handle this transition gracefully, but I highly doubt it is without great effort. One of my husband’s and my favorite sayings we have had to apply often is “Appreciate the similarities and respect the differences.” No one will ever agree one hundred percent with anyone else, even with our spouse or children, but with God’s help, we can learn to respect and support each other.

And although the relationship with our children changes when they get married, some things remain the same. Just as my husband and I prayed for our little girl—that the right godly man would come along and be her knight in shining armor and the spiritual leader in her life—we now continue to pray for the two of them as husband and wife. We trust that God will bring them together stronger as they, too, learn and grow through inevitable life changes. Deuteronomy 31:6 reminds us, "So be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid and do not panic before them. For the LORD your God will personally go ahead of you. He will neither fail you nor abandon you.” (NLT) We now continually pray that they will both look up for answers and not out to the world, listening to the Holy Spirit in all decisions as they build their life together. As Jesus says in John 14:17, “He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth. The world cannot receive him because it isn’t looking for him and doesn’t recognize him. But you know him because he lives with you now and later will be in you.” (NLT)

As the sun set on my daughter’s wedding, the sun also set on a previous chapter of life, not only for us but also for them. But even as one stage ended, God’s glory shone brightly on the new beginnings of their life together. Psalm 91 assures us that God is in control. And as we deal with changes, we can be reminded, from Psalm 91:14-16, The LORD says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.”

As Christian parents, as difficult as it is to let go, we can always trust that God’s love for our children far exceeds our love for them. And by holding onto that, we can celebrate with them, even as we all continue to grow and develop into who God created us to be. All for His glory!

Diane is a professional meeting planner with over 40 years of experience in the hospitality industry - planning, contracting, and executing meetings and events worldwide. (www. ExecutiveDiamond.com) She and her husband Les have been married 31 years, have three beautiful adult girls, and work together in their ministry, HALO - Highway, Healing Arts Life’s Oxygen. (www.HALOHighway.com) Although she never envisioned being a writer, Diane loves the impact made on lives in the various ministries of Women World Leaders and World Publishing and Productions.