Through a Mother’s Eyes

Change Is Inevitable

BY DIANE CHEVELDAYOFF

Life is constantly changing, something we may or may not be fond of. We can be floating serenely when we suddenly find our peaceful coasting rush into the unknown territory of crazy rapids. On the other hand, we may be fully aware that change is necessary, so we endeavor to make a course correction, only to slip back into our comfort zone. Or, feeling the need to control the current, we may ignore God’s promptings for change altogether and press through with our own agenda and desires, missing out on His plans.

Change is inevitable. The flow of our lives can fluctuate depending on many factors. But although change can be difficult, it is not always bad. And we shouldn’t miss our Godordained opportunities just to stay in our comfort zone. As Christians, we can trust God and always look for His guidance and blessings through the changes in our lives.

Currently, my personal life has so many moving parts that it’s hard to look beyond the moment at hand. But through the rapids, my husband and I are paddling in unison as we try to maintain our outlook of “deal with one day at a time.” The many changes in our lives remind me of something we’ve taught our girls from childhood into adulthood: The choices you make always impact and affect more than yourself. No one exists on an island. Recently, I’ve been reminded of that constantly. The decisions my husband and I make still impact our adult children.

As I write this, part of our present change is moving from the home we raised our girls in. The memories and simple things we minimized along the way are now presenting themselves in full force as the time has come to pack up and let go. Even simple things cause a rush of emotions for both our children and us. Recently, one daughter was home helping us pack up and get the house ready to sell. She was preparing the bedroom they all loved, which had a small loft, more of a hang-out place, where many friends had signed their wall. In the process of taking down the pictures and repairing the holes, my daughter also repainted the loft wall, ultimately washing away all those memories from her childhood. I already knew it was hard for her to let go of the home, and this difficult task truly broke my heart and reminded me of the reality of our upcoming move and how it was affecting her. Our choices affect others. And we shouldn’t minimize that. Despite the fact that everyone in my family has recognized, through many confirmations, that this particular change is God-ordained, we’ve all also seen the importance of handling each other’s emotions and memories with care.

And just like our choices affect our children, their choices also affect us. As parents, it is difficult to watch your children make what you consider the wrong decision. That is because it is natural to want to protect our children from difficulties, especially when we recognize that their own actions may lead them into rough waters. It’s normal to feel the urge to yell out warnings or do everything we can to avert them from repeating past actions that have derailed them. But as parents of older children, we can learn and grow and change even as we allow our children to learn and grow and change. We can do that by pressing into God in prayer, who will often lead us to listen to our children as we work carefully to guide them without shutting them down. The change in our children’s lives can change us, bringing us to an even more dependent walk with God.

Whether it is our children or us in a whirlwind of change, we need to recognize the only thing that doesn’t change is God and His Word. As Scripture says in Hebrews 6:18, So God has given both His promise and His oath. These two things are unchangeable because it is impossible for God to lie. Therefore, we who have fled to him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold to the hope that lies before us. (NLT) And as Psalm 46:1-2 says, God is our refuge and strength, A very present help in trouble. Therefore, we will not fear though the earth should change. (NASB) As we think of God as our refuge, consider that He is our protection, strength, and power.

Life is constantly changing. Whether hitting us directly or indirectly, its impact still affects each of us in many ways. Just as my husband and I have taught our girls to listen to the Holy Spirit, we recognize that we, too, need to remember to listen to Him. Let us all lean into these Scriptures by thinking deeper, asking for specific answers in our prayers, and KNOWING that God IS with us. And He cares about all the changes we are going through. He is our refuge and strength—our protection and power. Even in our ever-changing lives and world, He will never change!

THE ONLY THING THAT DOESN’T CHANGE IS GOD AND HIS WORD.

Diane is a professional meeting planner with over 40 years of experience in the hospitality industry - planning, contracting, and executing meetings and events worldwide. (www.ExecutiveDiamond.com) She and her husband, Les, have been married for over 31 years and have three beautiful adult girls. Doing life together is important to Diane as she supports his pastoral role and enjoys helping others have a healthy marriage. As AACC certified coaches, they specialize in pre-marriage, marriage fundamentals, and threatened marriages through Breakwater Coaching and in their ministry, HALO Highway, Healing Arts Life’s Oxygen. (www.HALOHighway.com) She can be reached at Diane@ExecutiveDiamond.com