7 minute read
A Beautiful Mess
by Jessica Prukner
Our family lives in sunny Florida, where the wonderful warm sun shines almost daily. In the winter, our beautiful island brings thousands of “snowbirds”—people who live in the north during the summer and in the south during the winter— and spring break visitors, making the traffic similar to New York City. So as a family with a flexible homeschooling schedule, we decided to leave the wonderful sun and beautiful palm trees for a little while and head to snowy Utah so the kids could enjoy the winter sports activities they loved back when they grew up in Michigan. Off we went with great anticipation for winter fun, our bags packed full of warm winter gear: snow pants, gloves, hats, boots, and multiple layers.
Our family friend in Utah loves to take the kids skiing, and together, they headed to Park City to enjoy the slopes while my husband and I shopped at the stores—trekking the streets in the snow and ice and getting drenched by snowflakes while waiting in the area as they skied all day. It was a great day; everyone had a wonderful time.
We planned to take the second day off from skiing and try snowmobiling. Our family had never snowmobiled before, but we had done many other activities that seemed similar, like four-wheeling, ATVing, and jet skiing. We drove two hours into the mountains to an absolutely breathtaking scenic tour area. We got fitted in our gear and partnered up for the adventure. Just as we were about to go out, we were given a quick tutorial and kindly reminded how easily these machines can flip. That had me a little concerned, but we have done far crazier things. As we left, I had some caution in the back of my mind.
We zipped through some of the most gorgeous trails that looked like they came right out of the Narnia movies. I couldn’t believe the beauty that was all around me. We enjoyed ourselves racing through leafless white birch trees and gigantic pine trees. The smells of evergreen were amazing; we were having the time of our lives. About an hour into the tour, we reached the top of the mountain, where the guide had us take our group photos. It was epic—everything I had expected the day to be. We were then told to drive down a little hill and pull off to the side to wait for the remaining groups to take their photos.
My husband went down first and parked. I followed next. Then, our friend who was driving our son followed; he decided to do a slow turnaround before parking. Unfortunately, that turnaround was on a three-foot snow embankment, which, because they were going at such a slow speed, caused the snowmobile to flip over. Seeing this coming, the driver jumped off, but my son was unaware of what was happening and stayed on for the four-second time frame, which ended with the snowmobile landing on my son’s right leg.
Sheer terror came to us all as we watched the huge machine land on our son. My husband and I got off our snowmobiles and attempted to run through three feet of snow as fast as we could, falling and tripping continuously. My oldest daughter ran up the hill for help, unaware of her brother’s condition. Thankfully, when we reached our son, he was alive and conscious but screaming in pain.
We quickly checked him out and saw that his injuries were not life-threatening. My oldest daughter was completely freaking out trying to reach help, while my youngest daughter was sitting on the snowmobile in silence. Once we got help for our son, we surveyed the situation and got him back on his snowmobile for the rough ride back to camp. Then, I immediately went to help my daughters. My youngest was still calm on the snowmobile, but my oldest daughter needed help calming down. I laid her in the snow and had her take deep breaths until she was able to speak, assuring her all was ok.
Once she was under control, we were all able to make the twenty-minute ride back to camp to survey the real damage. In those twenty minutes, I had so many motherly emotions and feelings to process. First, I had total gratitude and thanksgiving to God that our son was alright and was not injured more seriously. I was also thankful that when he picked his gear, the flimsy snow boot he wanted was wet inside, leading him to pick the only dry boot left, which was a ski boot! I know God had protected him from a more serious injury to his ankle by having that flimsy boot be wet and providing the ski boot instead. While we traveled, I was still so in awe of the nature and creation that God created all around me. My oldest daughter was riding behind me, thanking me in tears for being able to show up for her in that scary time of trauma.
There were almost too many different emotions happening all at the same time as I processed the reality of life being both good and bad, sometimes in the same moment. Being with my kids these past years on a daily and hourly basis has allowed me the extra time to see their personality types and learn how they are each unique and different. Clearly, this is still possible for the parents who send their kids to school. But as I drove 40 mph through the snowy trees, I was thankful that through the homeschooling path we chose, God provided a way for me to understand my kids in such different and unique ways and allowed me to show up for each of them in this scary, tragic time. It has always boggled my mind how my husband and I raised three kids in a 39-month age gap in all the same ways, but somehow, they each turned out so completely different. I have learned that just as their education learning styles are different, so are their personalities and needs.
Each child reacts differently, processes and sees the world through their own lens, and experiences things uniquely, too. One of our jobs as parents is to learn these differences so we are able to love and parent our kids the way they need according to how God created them. In that horrifying moment, there was no greater joy as a mom to know that I did just that. After all the years of trying to understand and know my kids so I could be a better teacher, as a mom, I was able to be what each of my kids needed. I don’t tell this story to boast but to open your eyes to the daily opportunity God has given each one of us to not just exist in our sometimes mundane days but to explore, examine, and be curious about these beautiful, unique, special gifts God has given us to care for and love. Homeschooling isn’t about just the education; it’s about the daily opportunities to learn about our kids—how they work, how they learn, how they love, how they hurt, how they celebrate, and how they grieve; and then to be the one to support and champion them in their lives as they grow from little children to adults.
Sadly, my son’s ankle was broken, and his knee had an MCL sprain, but those things will heal, and the memory of that day will become a core memory for us all. Thankfully, it’s a core memory we can look back on and see God’s miracle hand of protection at work and the love and support from each other that our family needed during a scary time. Don’t take your time with your kids for granted; use it to master the ability to be the best you can be for each one of them. I promise you the day will come when your children will need you to show up for them like I was able to out in those snowy Utah woods.
ONE OF OUR JOBS AS PARENTS IS TO LEARN THESE DIFFERENCES SO WE ARE ABLE TO LOVE AND PARENT OUR KIDS THE WAY THEY NEED.
