July Magazine 2012

JULY 2012

The Nicole Ayers story

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A message from the Founder Working on this issue of our magazine has been one of the hardest things I had to do, and one question kept coming to mind and that is, when shall it be enough?

There can be no excuse for Domestic Violence and Abuse but when it comes to Human Trafficking it takes an individual, a group, or an organization without a heart, conscience, soul, and scruples to traffic and sell people. To sell persons to the highest bidder is an abomination, to hold a person captive and rent their body throughout the day to gratify the sexual pervasion of men and women, is a grotesque act and deserves swift punishment.

When I listened to the cries of mothers who’s daughters have vanished in thin air it is appalling, when you hear the brokenness of father’s who may never see their sons again there is no words which can comfort them.

When you speak with victims who have been rescued from the hands of their trafficker all you can do is cry, cry because there is no words which can be formulated in any language to restore the innocence of these victims, no words which can erase months and years of torture, and no words which can make them feel whole and clean again.

Some victims have been subjected to such pain, deprivation and torture during their enslavement that the horrific acts are too sick to mention however their horror does not cease after they are freed for they continue to live that horror story because they have been given a life sentence for during the period of their slavery they contracted a deadly sexually transmitted disease and their life is now waning away. What words of comfort can be said at such times?

When victims of human trafficking prefer to take their own life, than be subjected to sexual exploitation. What words of solace can be said?

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When the family members of victims are stuck in time afraid to move forward, but have too, when nights have become a nightmare for they are tormented by sleep and days are filled with sorrow because of the memories. What words of hope can be given?

Victims of human trafficking have been taken captive in this evil trade through the following ways: Kidnapped Coerced Answering ads for work Seeking a better standard of life and living for themselves and their family Many victims have a 24 hour shift being rented every hour on the hour until their body can no longer hold up it is at such times that they are considered expired and they are either left to rot and die in excreting pain or their life is snuffed out by murder and their bodies disposed of without the regards for sacred rite. Women, children, and men are brought over borders to be slaves in homes, on farms, in fields, brothels, and factories to them the days of “MASSER� are still active and alive, during their slavery period for I cannot call it work many of them are continually exploited sexually and physically, they are drained as they have no day offs and no weekend to rest.

They are confined to their quarters, beaten, spat upon, degraded, and dehumanized. Upon arriving to the desired destination of the slave trader many of the victims who have answered work ads have their documentation’s ceased and they are now a slave forever working to pay off a debt which never decreases. Many victims are forced to call their family members and inform them that they are doing fine and do not worry about them for they chose to leave many victims are unable to go to the police for they are constantly watched and guarded.

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many are afraidfrom for their and the life of their family as many slave masters A message thelifeFounder threaten victims by saying “I will kill your entire family if you try to escape” I want you for a moment to imagine : Imagine a female six year old child, a young woman, or an adult female being sexually exploited every hour on the hour by men and women who practice all type of unimaginable sexual acts on these slaves, using all manner of tools to give pain only to gratify their sick, perverted, depraved morbid desires.

Imagine a six year old male child, a young man or an adult male being sexually exploited every hour on the hour by men and women who pay to use the bodies of the slaves for their own sick behaviour, it truly takes a person without a soul to dehumanize a child, a young adult, or an adult by upholding and increasing the profits of human trafficking and the hands of traffickers.

It takes a mindless and barbaric corporation to uphold force labour and production in sweat shops all in the name of product, brand name, family name, and profits. But then again there is that old saying which goes like this “Money corrupts good manners” and “Money buys silence or breaks it”.

We can no longer sit and be comfortable about the 27 million estimated human beings who are sold, rented, used, abused, and traded. We can no longer say our life is too busy we have no time to get involved, we can no longer say there is nothing I can do, and we can no longer hold back on our resources.

There is an immediate urgency for education, intervention, assistance, and for human resources with all their capabilities and gifts to be employed in this cause. Get in touch with organizations which are working to free victims and educate persons.

As for O.A.B.I. We have taken the responsibility to dedicate a section of this magazine to share information about human trafficking, forced labour, and sex trafficking, we have also dedicated a section to missing persons our aim is to have copies of this magazine in every airport, every point of entry within every country, every hotel room no matter the size, distributed in ever village, town, capital, it must be shared in every school, college, and university.

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Every home, hut, or cave must have a copy of this magazine. Human trafficking is a serious issue it is a pressing issue daughters and sons are missing and they are forced into servitude, death, and destruction. The time has come for you to ACT and that time is NOW!!!! A human life is priceless no monetary value can be attached to it.

For you to sit back and do nothing is to stand with the trafficker of humans and those who exploit them, the same acts which you detest you are upholding by your failure for you choose to do nothing.

We implore you to get on board and let us plaster this world with information, it is time to wage WAR on human trafficking will you join us in this war or will you say “this is not my fight�.

Sherna Benjamin Founder of O.A.B.I.: Organization for Abused and Battered Individuals

Time to Act!!!

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A Fragile Doll

By Terri Lanahan

A fragile doll that stands on a shelf, she bears her pain all by herself.

A doll you see, but never hear.

She stands alone Overwhelmed with fear.

As time goes by, she fills the shelves with clutter.

If she felt alone her stomach would twist and flutter.

She didn’t want to listen to the sound of her own mind When her feelings and her thoughts would slowly unwind.

He always tried to shatter her when she was left by herself.

Then, she was placed back upon a shelf.

So there she stands alone, in her pretty dress.

No one sees that underneath she’s a shattered and broken mess.

They do not see the tears on her porcelain face.

They do not see the blood that has stained her lace.

As time passes by she finds her pain only increases.

She realizes she has to mend all those broken pieces.

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Contributing Writers

Photographer of all local images

Sherna Benjamin

Vanessa Kent

Terri Lanahan

Of Upright Productions

Mary Graziano Lean J. Albright

Artist

James Barnes

Michal Madison

Bjtindle Crossover at Eagles Point

Editors

Richard A. Sands

Sherna Benjamin Michal Madison Deon Jeffers Natasha Bain And team

Jamie Shelley Healing Gods Men Brinda Carey Leo. Alvarez Dr. David A. Crenshaw Dr. Ariel King Nikki Wells Kylee Ingram

On the Cover

Julie Federico Angela

Human Trafficking 16

Rodney Calmes

RAZING HELL 88

Sonia A. Adams

Missing Persons 124

Valeria Long Ed Eberly Dr. Mary Jo Odom-Dull

Gone but not forgotten– The Nicole Ayers story 134

Lela Ann Albert Summer Hawk

UNITE 182 9

July What’s in THIS ISSUE A message from the Founder.…...………………………..………………4 A Fragile Doll…………………………………………..………………...8 The Forgotten Children...……………………………………………..…13

Human Trafficking Tragic Truths About Human Trafficking..………………….. 20 The A21 Campaign.………………………………………26 C.A.S.E Act……………………………………………….28 Human Trafficking..……………………………………... 32 Modern Day Slavery...……………………………………..38 State of American Society Address .……………………...44 International Justice Mission ……….……………………46 Take Back the Night …………………….……………………………...50 Healing Gods Men ……………………………………..………..…….. 54 Magazine Openings ………………………………………………….... 57 10

Refuge of Light …………………..……….…………………………….60 Drug Addicted Babies …………………………..………………………64

Priceless Advice from Dr. David A. Crenshaw Development of a Healthy Sense of Self in Children …….70 A Mother’s Fight ……………………….……………………………....82

Feature RAZING HELL ….…………………………......88 The Two of US– RAZING HELL Producer……..94 Meet a Woman on the Front Line Razing Hell…...98

Julie’s Corner Julie Federico and Ending Child Abuse………108 When Justice Turns ………...…………..……………………………..116

Missing Children and Adults Missing Children……………...124 11

Gone but NOT Forgotten The Nicole Ayers Story .…………………...134 You Will See Them Someday ……..………………………..…………141 How I Survived .……………………………………………..………...142

Moments of Grace and Reflection The Fathers Love ………………………...…………………..148 Lord I Run to You .………………………..…………………150 Jesus Love You Personally ………………...………………...151 Broken ……………………………………...………………..152 Dear S.B ……………………………………………………………….154 Things are out of Control…... …………………………………………………. 160 Am I Worthy? ………...………………… …………………………………….. 164

The Reading Corner Recommended books for reading ………………...……..166 UNITE ………………………………………………………………...182 Human Trafficking Organisations ..…………………………………...190

Website: www.oabivoices.org Radio Show: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/oabivoicesunitednetwork Contact us: Email: oabi@oabivoices.org Send Articles to: articles@oabivoices.org 12 Information: support@oabivoices.org

THE FORGOTTEN CHILDREN We need to be the voices of children everywhere, Alone, abandoned, with bruises it seems like no-one cares.

Their abusers keep them silent with threats, their bodies shake, Feelings kept inside themselves their smiles, they always fake.

Words that hurt so deeply Destroys their self-esteem, Shame they feel inside themselves in their minds is where they scream.

Secrets so deep and never to be told they lived it every day, these are the forgotten children let’s scream out and shout and pray.

Pray that we can save them from a life of horrendous abuse, To set them free and guide them it’s up to us, there's no excuse.

Each day one child will die alone from their wounds inside and out, scars so deep, with bodies broke from this abuse, there is no doubt.

Remember all children everywhere Protection is what they need, Broken, alone and frightened from the abusers dirty deeds.

I write these words, for all children small And that little girl in me, Silenced then, but not anymore I will shout out to help set them free.

Written by Mary Graziano June 19, 2012 13

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Human Trafficking Is The Fastest Growing Criminal Enterprise In The World

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Are you a part of the problem or the solution?

There Are An Estimated 27 Million People Trapped In Slavery At This Moment.

There Are An Estimated 13 Million Children Trapped In Slavery At This Moment.

17 Run By Organized Crime.

Human Trafficking Is Often

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Tragic truths about the realities of human trafficking. 

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Human Trafficking Is The Fastest Growing Criminal Enterprise In The World.

Human Trafficking Is The Second Largest Criminal Enterprise In The World.

There Are An Estimated 27 Million People Trapped In Slavery At This Moment.

There Are An Estimated 13 Million Children Trapped In Slavery At This Moment.

Human Trafficking Is Often Run

By Organized Crime.

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As Many As 30% Of Human Trafficking Victims Will Have An Encounter With A Healthcare Professional DURING The Time That They Are Being Held In Slavery, And Virtually None Of These Individuals Will Be Recognized As Victims By Their Healthcare Provider.

A Relatively Large Percentage Of Young Women And Children That Are Trafficked For Sexual Exploitation Will Become HIV Positive.

Approximately 20,000 Individuals Are Trafficked INTO The United States From Other Countries Every Year.

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Over 100,000 Of Our Own Young Women And Children Are Subject To Commercial Sexual Exploitation In The United States Every Year.

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There Are An Estimated 200,000 Young Women And Children From Nepal Being Held Prisoners In Brothels In India At This Moment.

According To Interpol, Over 30,000 Young Women Are Missing In Romania. 

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Conservative Estimates Are That over 500,000 Young Women Have Been Trafficked Out Of The Old U.S.S.R. Countries.

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The Average Age Of A Young Woman First Being Trafficked Is 12-14 Years Old.

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75% Of All Victims Of Human Trafficking Are Female.

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75% Of Human Trafficking Is For Sexual Exploitation.

Over 50% Of All Human Trafficking Victims Are Children.

The Average Cost Of Medicine For An HIV Positive Individual In Nepal Is $3.00 Daily, Yet Most Of These Individuals Will Not Be Able To Afford To Buy Their Medicine.

Most Victims Of Human Trafficking Suffer From Malnutrition And Therefore Are Subject To Severe Dental Decay And Pain.

Doctors at War is currently assembling a team of physicians to help us provide care for victims of human trafficking. http://www.doctorsatwar.org/human-trafficking-facts.php 23

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When confronted with the horrific statistics surrounding human trafficking, it is easy to agree on the fact that "someone should do something." The A21 Campaign was born when the decision was made to raise our hand, and be that "someone." It was a decision of ordinary people who decided to take responsibility regarding the issue of human trafficking. So with little knowledge, and a lot of passion, in 2007 we set out to make a difference.

After extensive research, planning, fundraising, more research, relationship building, a lot of learning, and a great leap of faith, we opened our first shelter for victims of human trafficking at the end of 2008 in Greece. Through the shelter and transition home, we are able to provide trafficked victims with a safe, loving, and comforting environment, access to medical care and psychological assessment, vocational training, assistance in university education, life guidance and counselling, and access to legal assistance. We work closely with police, hospitals, and government officials, and are seeing justice enjoyed by new rescued victims each month.

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In 2011 we were able to apply what we had learned and opened our second transition home in Ukraine. Because Ukraine is one of the largest exporters of women into the international sex industry, the A21 team is also focusing our efforts on preventing human trafficking before it happens through school tours, working with orphanages, and education.

This year our focus is to expand our efforts into Bulgaria where we will also be opening a new transition home. We have team on the ground and are working to establish relationships and reach out to those who are the most at risk of being trafficked.

We are also in the process of setting up our UK office where we have had tremendous success in reaching out to students and educating them about human trafficking. We are excited to see this program expand into many more countries in the future and believe that as our generation continues to stand for justice, we will see slavery ended in our lifetime.

We do not claim to be the "experts" and recognize that our fight for justice has only just begun, but The A21 Campaign rings true through the famous words of Margaret Mead, "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has."

The A21 Campaign stands for Abolishing Injustice in the 21st Century.

Anyone can join. Everyone can make a difference.

To find out more information about The A21 Campaign, check out

their website http://www.thea21campaign.org/ 27

Today is Independence Day -- a time when our country celebrates freedom and our founding principles of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. We enjoy time with family and friends, BBQ, and watch fireworks overhead.

But the shocking reality is that, even today, not all Americans are free.

Right now, women and children are being held by human traffickers in a modern day form of slavery. They are sold for commercial profit and abused physically, mentally, and sexually.

I know this because I was one of those girls. At age 14 I left home for what I thought would be a better life. But instead, I ran right into the arms of a trafficker who exploited me for money. For years, I was trafficked on the streets and sold online. I endured what no child should have to go through.

Thankfully, I was able to break free from this life. But I was one of the lucky ones. Young women and girls right here in California are still being trafficked, exploited and sold in modern day slavery.

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The first step in ending this crime is passing the CASE Act this November. This landmark legislation will increase the penalties against traffickers and give law enforcement the tools they need to stop this despicable industry -- but we all need to pitch in to make this law a reality.

Thank you so much for adding your name to our 1 Million Strong Against Human Trafficking effort. Now, please help us expand our reach by inviting your family and friends and urging them to visit www.CASEAct.org to add their names, too!

There are many ways that you can help us as we fight to pass the CASE Act. As you celebrate the 4th of July today, please introduce the CASE Act to your friends and family and urge them to vote “Yes!” this November.

Tell them to visit CASEAct.org to learn more. Urge them to add their own names to our 1 Million Strong Against Human Trafficking effort. Together, we can take a stand and say that we won’t tolerate the sexual exploitation of children by human traffickers any more.

Human trafficking can only succeed in the shadows. The CASE Act will help to shine a light in some of the darkest corners of our state, and strike a major blow against one of the most heinous crimes imaginable.

As we celebrate the birth of our nation today, let’s also redouble our efforts to make sure vulnerable young women and girls in our state are freed from the threat of human traffickers who get rich and throw their victims away.

If we work together, I know we can succeed. We must -- it is long past time to bring this crime of stolen innocence to an end.

With gratitude, Leah J. Albright-Byrd Human trafficking survivor 29

Human trafficking is modern-day slavery,

This publication was made possible in part through Grant Number 90XR0012/02 from the Anti-Traffickin 30 the responsibility of the authors and do not nec Human Services (HHS). Its contents are solely

Refugee Resettlement, or HHS.

and it’s happening right here in the United States.

National Human Trafficking Resource Center (NHTRC) 1-888-3737-888 email: NHTRC@PolarisProject.org TOLL-FREE | 24 Hours/day, 7 Days/week

WHO ARE THE VICTIMS? Victims are forced to provide labor or commercial sex, and can be: • U.S. citizens or foreign nationals • Men, women, or children

WHERE DOES HUMAN TRAFFICKING HAPPEN? Human trafficking can happen in many situations, including in: • Commercial sex industry (street prostitution, strip clubs, massage parlours, escort services, brothels, internet) • Factories (industrial, garment, meat-packing) • Farms, landscaping, or construction • Peddling rings, begging rings, or magazine crews • Private homes (housekeepers, nannies, or servile marriages) • Restaurants, bars, and other service industries (nail or hair salons)

Call to report a potential case, get information or resources, request training or technical assistance, or receive referrals.

FOR MORE INFORMATION: www.TraffickingResourceCenter.org

ng in Persons Division, Office of Refugee Resettlement, U.S. Department of Health and

31 cessarily represent the official views of the Anti-Trafficking in Persons Division, Office of

Human Trafficking Also known as Modern Day Slavery since there is more people held today then all of history put together.

Human Trafficking is a growing problem not only around the world but right here in the USA. It is estimated that there are over 2.5 million people in forced labor (including sexual exploitation) at any given time as a result of Human Trafficking. The majority of victims are between 18 and 24 years old with a estimated 1.2 million victims being children (under 18 years old.)

As a result of the growing global economic crisis the problem of human trafficking will grow as it has been for the last 10 years. In the United States the US State Dept. listed the US as a destination country (meaning this was the destination of trafficking victims) however, in the last few years the US is now listed also as a source country (meaning the country is a source for new victims.) With over 2,300 children reported missing a day in the US it shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone.

With an estimation of over 31.5 billion in profits brought in by human trafficking it is again no surprise why more and more organized crime are getting involved in Human Trafficking. Human Trafficking has surpassed gun trafficking and is only second to drug trafficking.

Victims: With the victims being often held in inhumane living conditions, sleeping on the floor, with very little food or drink, more often than not kept on drugs, in places no one can hear them scream. In sex trafficking they are forced into prostitution, often times being raped up to 30xs a day, along with the physical and mental abuse that they must endure every day. We have seen victims as young as 10 years old kept in these conditions.

WHY? I get asked that question a lot, “Why do these girls fall prey”?” Why don’t they just escape?” The best way I can answer that is from what I seen through my own experience.

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The victims more often than not are captured via fraud and coercion with the least way being force (however it does happen.) They are recruited in several different ways most believing they are going to earn a better life via having a better job. If they are coming from another country then it’s often to come here to be a waitress, maid or even a stripper, However they quickly learn that the traffickers imbedded them with a unattainable debt and that “waitress” job is now forced prostitution, they quickly learn that they were just “broken in” to hell. The threat to their own families, the forced addiction to drugs, and the continuous brainwashing is what keeps these victims from escaping.

So what can be done?

Breaking Out as a nonprofit organization believes in a proactive approach, As the US government learned in the 80s with the drug war that awareness campaigns were not enough they formed task forces to go after the dealers and take away their “product” Well Breaking Out using the same train of thought has teams of dedicated, trained individuals to go out and find and rescue victims no matter where in the world they are and take away these traffickers “products.” While in the US our licensed investigators aid and assist local and federal law enforcement to not only rescue the victims but to also gather the evidence needed to convict the traffickers. While Outside the US Breaking Out working with the US State Dept. and US Embassy’s send our rescue teams to these brothels and rescue our victims and bring them to undisclosed safe houses where they will start their rehabilitation process or the US embassy where we can get the US victims back home safely.

This along with our seminar and awareness program can hopefully let these traffickers know these victims are human beings; they are women and children not meant to be exploited for profit, They are not sub human and don’t need to be treated as such, We want to let these traffickers know you can’t have them and Breaking out is here to help them “break Out” of human trafficking.

Written by James Barnes, Founder Breaking Out Corporation 33

Breaking Out is a 501c3 organization, To support their efforts with donations or any questions please contact them using the following contact information.

www.breakingoutcorp.org phone-866-224- 2888 Email: Jbarnes@breakingoutcorp.org Jimmy Barnes, Founder, P.I, EPS,HTS Breaking Out corporation is Helping victims "Break Out" of Human Trafficking

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Modern day Slavery By bjtindle Slavery, Oppression, Bondage, Servitude, Captive, Confinement. Many words, and there are more, that apply to human trafficking. Human trafficking is fast becoming the major exploitation of the human body and spirit. A modern day form of slavery. It not only takes place in the poorest of societies but also in the richest. It takes place worldwide. All fifty states in the United States have reported human trafficking. Along with the other things I mentioned above, loss of freedom cannot be forgotten. While I know all the words above pertain to a loss of freedom, it seems to me that the words above, nor can the phrase "loss of freedom" encompass or come close to all that goes with being the victim of human trafficking.

According to the United Nations Office on Drugs and Crime (UNODC), human trafficking is defined as, "the recruitment, transportation, transfer, harbouring or receipt of persons, by means of threat or use of force or other forms of coercion, of abduction, of fraud, of deception, of the abuse of power or of a position of vulnerability or of the giving or receiving of payments or benefits to achieve the consent of a person having control over another person, for the purpose of exploitation." Force, coercion, and fraud are different ways people are recruited, or lured, with the promise of paid employment or a legitimate job. In most cases they are then provided with transportation to their new place of employment. Often the place of employment is in another country.

When they have arrived in their new home and country, their documents and identification are taken from them. They are not provided with new forms of identification. The majority of the traffickers are natives of the country where the trafficking process occurs. In many of the cases the recruiter is known to the victim, the percentage of recruiters being known by the victim versus being a stranger are almost half.

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Being a stranger to the victim represents about 54% of the recruiters of trafficking. It is estimated that up to 2 million people are in human trafficking at any time. Approximately 161 countries are affected as a result of human trafficking, whether they are the source, the transition area or the destination area.

"Of these: 1.4 million – 56% - are in Asia and the Pacific 250,000 – 10% - are in Latin America and the Caribbean 230,000 – 9.2% - are in the Middle East and Northern Africa 130,000 – 5.2% - are in sub-Saharan countries 270,000 – 10.8% - are in industrialized countries 200,000 – 8% - are in countries in transition" Some of the countries where most victims of trafficking end up are Australia, Brazil, India, Israel, Japan and others including the United States.

As for prosecuting the perpetrators, the numbers are not very encouraging. "In 2006 there were only 5,808 prosecutions and 3,160 convictions throughout the world. This means that for every 800 people trafficked, only one person was convicted in 2006".

Victims of trafficking come from all walks of life, rich and poor, educated and uneducated, single or married, adult or child. There is no particular criteria that exempts one from being a possible victim of trafficking. There are groups that are targeted. 18 - 24 years are targeted, most being children. The numbers of children who are victims of trafficking are estimated at 1.2 million per year. Many are people from poor, rural areas who lack education and/or come from poverty-stricken families. Many do have a mid-level education. Many are also victims of previous abuse within their own communities.

"Trafficking in persons is emerging as one of the most serious and complex human rights challenges. The scale of human trafficking is notoriously difficult to determine, with global estimates ranging anywhere from 500,000 to several million people trafficked every year.

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However, it is clear that the overwhelming majority of victims are women and children". Economic exploitation is most often the reason for entrapping a victim of human trafficking. Many experience sexual or physical violence during trafficking. Most are used for forced sexual exploitation in order to make money for the traffickers. Those used for forced economic exploitation, that includes those who are forced to labour in fields or work within the domestic arena as maids and housekeepers. The numbers for forced sexual exploitation are much higher than the latter. "The International Labour Organization (ILO) estimates that there are at least 12.3 million individuals in forced or bonded labour at any time.

They estimate that at least 1.39 million are victims of commercial sexual exploitation and that 56 percent of all trafficking victims are female."

Once a victim has been entrapped, their papers are taken from them. Many are forced in to sexual exploitation on their first night. Many are taken from their country of origin to another country on the promise of employment as a housekeeper or maid, a cook, or working in retail of some kind. The construction and manufacturing industries are some areas of commerce which exploit people. They are also physically, mentally and sexually abused. Many are charged exorbitant fees, such as housing costs, food, smuggling fees and drug habits.

The fees can be so high that it would be impossible to repay. Without papers, the traffickers also instil the victims with fear, fear of deportment, fear of physical abuse of any kind or even fear of being charged by officials for engagement in any illegal activities that their traffickers have imposed upon the victim. There are also effects of human trafficking upon society, not just the victim: Perpetuates social inequalities, especially to developing societies.

Public health issues in cost and treat to others.

Erosion of authority.

Traffickers work with impunity across borders with the involvement of organized crime.

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Losses to the community in terms of human and social investment Upon the victim: Traumatized Depression Stigmatized Outcast Vulnerable to a multitude of health issues, from HIV/Aids to pregnancy or drug addiction.

Over the last ten years human trafficking has gained increasing attention than in the past. Globally governments are enacting more policies and laws to combat the problem of trafficking. Hundreds of millions of dollars are being spent towards this end. The United Nations Office on Drugs and Crimes (UNODC) formally launched a global initiative to fight Human Trafficking. The UNODC helps around the world draft laws and develop anti-trafficking strategies. The challenge is taking theory and turning it into reality.

Some ways to recognize a victim of human trafficking: "Lack of freedom to leave home or working conditions.

Few or no personal possessions or financial records.

Lack of knowledge of a community, frequent movement.

Under 18 and providing commercial sex.

Not in control of own documents (passport, birth certificates.

Signs of physical abuse, restraint, malnourishment, lack of general health care.

Inconsistencies in story, "just visiting".

Individual owes a large debt and cannot pay it off".

Human Trafficking is becoming more and more of a problem in this world, it is a global problem and takes advantage of people in a multitude of ways and of numerous types of people.

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It is not limited to one area or one type of person. Your neighbour or a family member can place you in a position that can be terrifying to you. You can be approached anywhere, from the local airport to a local hotel by a stranger.

If you are interested in learning more about Human Trafficking I have provided some links: http://www.polarisproject.org/what-we-do/national-human-traffickinghotline/the-nhtrc/overview http://www.humantrafficking.org/ http://www.unodc.org/unodc/en/human-trafficking/what-is-humantrafficking.html http://www.amnestyusa.org/violence-against-women/end-humantrafficking/page.do?id=1108428 Credit the following sources for this article From Human Trafficking Facts written by By Tulika Nair Published: 11/2/2010 http://www.buzzle.com/articles/human-trafficking-facts.html http://www.unglobalcompact.org/docs/issues_doc/labour/Forced_labour/ HUMAN_TRAFFICKING_-_THE_FACTS_-_final.pdf US State Department, Trafficking in Persons Report (2007) p.36 From UN Women http://www.unifem.org/gender_issues/ women_war_peace/human_trafficking.php http://confereinservitus.org/what-is-human-trafficking/ http://www.bhtc.us/files/Broward%20Webinar%20.pdf 42

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State of American Society Address

By Crossover at Eagles Point Here are a few brimming, err, boiling thoughts from within as I navigate through the current state of affairs in American society as pertaining to objectification of women. This will by no means be able to contain all my observations and reactions. There is not enough space in cyber land for that. Besides, I generally do not have the time and patience to walk through the tedious path of exploring and expressing what lies within.

Speaking allows me to do that in a much more tolerable forum.

The following is the response of someone to a recent ruling in New York dismissing charges for a man who had viewed and saved child pornography images on his computer for years. “You have to be kidding me. These are your children being exposed and exploited. Since when is a minor able to make a personal decision legally to exploit themselves or allow vile people to do what they want to make money off of them? The fact that Kent had any images saved on his PC constitutes affirmative action.

And if he had not saved those 13000 images, if they were cached in his browser history folders, that constitutes proactive surfing and viewing!

Where is your sense of dire responsibility and duty to the public and the future of our nation with your judgments? (BTW, I represent an untold multitude of people from my locality.)”

Here is a comment from a director of an aftercare organization while at a restaurant in DC. “So, I’m in this cafe and this guy next to me says on the phone to someone that after he goes to the Washington Correspondent’s dinner, he’s going to hit up some strip clubs. Then, 5 minutes later, he asks me if I’d like to go out with him late tonight. First of all, no thank you.”

Where are all the real men out there?! I know there are some, standing up for what’s right, doing right by their wives or significant others, but I just get stirred to a point of such unrest when I hear these stories, whether it’s 44

excessively horrible decision-making from the bench, or pigs-for-men humans animalistically planning their poach on women, and with the nerve to try to act humane towards a colleague and friend of mine, and precious daughter of God, all in the same breath. And I can’t tell you how many times I have heard within the past couple months men all around me not taking care of their partners by the way they treat them, talk to them, interact with them—and with no apologies. And how many multitudes more, while perhaps not being this extreme, are living in selfish apathy?

Is it possible for a man to be that frustrated with his own gender, to the point of discouragement? Is it possible for someone to be a realist and an idealist at the same time? I want to lock every man in one big room and go to work on them, and not let one of them out until they are worthy of the women outside. While I have such a negative perception of men with respect to women, I also am a dreamer, and I believe in amazing miracles on all levels, including a reviving of men standing up with a real backbone, with humble faith, selfless servitude, and a restored dignity for their precious partners, our sisters and daughters.

When it comes to the exploitation of women, I find myself on three sides of the fence. First and foremost, my heart shatters for the women at how the men enslave and exploit them, and all the insane, vicious acts they endure and absorb upon their body and soul. That is a clear and unmatched number one. Secondly, my fists clench at the men and their sadistic, repulsive, beyond-reproachable ways. But thirdly, my heart breaks for the men at how sin enslaves and exploits their own heart and soul. It’s a three -way civil war that makes for some interesting intercession, to put it shallowly. Oh, and I guess I’m not including my disgust with how some unworthy social workers and counselors (that need fired on the spot) treat their clients so bad so as to re-traumatize those in their care.

Now, this issue has become so bad that there are women who have not only come to a place of accepting the basement level lowered standard of men out there, married and unmarried, but who have even made 45

themselves available in various forums to talk to other women struggling with their significant other’s faithfulness—and not from the perspective of sympathizing with only the women, but also defending the men a little in the process!

One particular forum was addressing partners and wives whose men are engaged in pornographic adultery of the heart, whether videos and/or internet. The female moderator ‘encouraged’ the women, who were complaining and hurt by the lack of affection, intimacy, attention and overall interaction from their man, and how it made them feel degraded and less of a woman, or not good enough. This female moderator basically said that since porn is everywhere, women need to accept this fact, that if a woman will put herself out there, men will watch it. [That’s a lie. See myself.] And men just need sex, more than one woman may be able to provide, so they should not be offended. If it seems to be too much to deal with, women should talk to their man and perhaps strike up a compromise, where the man can slow down a little, or still try to be sensitive and affectionate with their significant. Women should simply learn to live with this, and work towards a balance, and hopefully men will give a little back.

Whether this moderator was actually a female or not, I’m not 100% sure.

She did have an elaborate site set up well beyond this particular article and section. But…needless to say, my jaw went through the floor and bounced off the top of the devil’s head in hell before it returned to my palate. I do not have the capacity to channel the oceanic river within into a portal narrow enough to script my response to this. But let me say this: the devil is a liar. I’m done writing. I’ve had enough. Here’s a few closing thoughts to leave you with, taken from my Meditations page… If a man says he loves you, find out what he wants: your body, or your heart. Deprive him of your body, and you’ll see what you really have in him. Pornography, as with any area of the sex industry and any illicit behavior, is not only reinforcing the exploitation of women, but it’s also the exploitation and rape of a man’s own soul.

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International Justice Mission HANDS HOLDING STEPHANIE - TVPA AWARENESS Education & Awareness 4: Prevention, Protection, Prosecution and Partnerships Stephanie Brown, Richard’s 17-year old granddaughter, died of a fatal drug-overdose on March 16, 2007, after being hired at a local downriver strip-club in Lincoln Park, Michigan, where two patrons (a volunteer basketball coach and an ordained minister) including a dancer at the club, sex-trafficked Stephanie to a local motel down the street and where she died that morning.

The State of Michigan and Stephanie’s family successfully prosecuted the drug-dealing, junior high school volunteer coach and later settled out-ofcourt with the strip-club for employing an underage person for sex-work.

However, Richard continues to pursue other legal rights, causes and criminal investigations in human and labour trafficking cases regarding Stephanie’s case at the local, state and federal levels including international awareness and education. https://ijmfreedommaker.org/campaign/402/Hands-Holding-Stephanie-TVPA-Awareness Richard A. Sands, Ret. PI (AhEeCOSH) Investigative Reporter 734-771-7251 Fax: 734-281-4087 rsands4996@marygrove.edu www.michiganrescueandrestore.com www.4preventionDGHTnews.wordpress.com www.richard-a-sands.blogspot.com www.humantrafficking.msu.edu www.polarisproject.org www.sharedhope.org www.sob-csc.org 47

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Take back the Night

By Jamie Shelley

Picturing yourself as a young child did you ever imagine yourself being exposed to things that you shouldn’t have? At the age of 6 I was doing things that some adults don’t even do.

I was exposed to things that I should never have done as a child. I was scared that they were going to blame it on me. At the age of five and six I was being raped by my brother Joseph, and my next door neighbour Charlie.

The abuse with my next door neighbour started when I was 5 and the abuse with my brother started when I was about six.

Charlie told me that he would protect me from my parents and for some reason I believed him.

Charlie would take me on trips to Boston and if I said no my parents would make me go. He would take me to a warehouse and shut the door behind us so he could rape me. He told me that if I screamed he would kill me and then go back and kill my family.

I was so embarrassed that it was happening to me that I tried to keep it a secret. When I was eleven almost twelve I told my best friend what was going on with Charlie and she told her mother. Her mother had hot lined it and he was arrested the same day after I had talked to the investigators and told them what was happening.

He went straight to prison for 25 years to life. When my mother found out all she did was look at me and ask if I told the investigators that she knew.

Both Charlie and my brother, Joseph brought nothing along but pain and suffering.

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I was ashamed of myself and I thought that maybe it was something that I had done to make them want to hurt me. My brother promised that he would protect me; he told me that he loved me and he told me that I was safe when I was with him. I was young and naïve and I believed it.

Joseph being the oldest child always had to watch me no matter how hard I cried and told my parents not to leave me with him they still would. My brother would force me to stay home with him so he could get his pleasure. That’s what he always told me.

He would call his friends to ask them if they wanted to come over and have some fun. My brother allowed all of his friends to take advantage of me no matter how much I cried and screamed. When it was time for his friends to leave they would tell me how good I was and how much fun they had. Before they left they would ask my brother when the next time was that they could come over and have fun and my brothers response would be next time I’m going to charge you.

Three months later I finally built up the courage to tell my guidance counsellor about what my brother was doing. My brother was too young to go to jail so they placed him back in the house until they could find him somewhere to go. He was finally moved in with a family friend but the rape continued.

I went to the shelter and a couple of other places before returning back to what I was supposed to call my home. He was finally in placement but even that didn’t prevent the rape. When he came on home visits that were supposed to be with his friend he would still come over and rape me. The rape didn’t stop until I was thirteen and left my house permanently.

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Both my parents were to busy drinking and doing drugs to care about what was going on. My mother knew about everything and still didn’t care. She still made me go over with my next door neighbour and stay home with my brother.

My mom walked in on my brother as he was raping me, she looked at me and said that I was getting what I deserve and she started laughing. My parents always told me that I was to blame for everything that happened and for the longest time I actually believed them. I was always the target for things. If either one of my parents were mad, my siblings and I were beat.

We were homeless for a while because my parents refused to pay the rent because they wanted the money for drugs and alcohol. The assault affected me in many ways. It started by me not trusting people and building a wall so that people couldn’t get through. I felt alone and I didn’t know what to do or how to feel.

By the age of 11 I had already tried to kill myself. I started cutting and burning and eventually I started with my eating disorder. I had been hospitalized numerous times and no one knew how to help me because I wouldn’t talk to any one.

I couldn’t sleep at night because I was having nightmares. I would find myself waking up in the middle of the night crying. I remember wishing everyday that it would be my last. I couldn’t be near certain people or smells because I would find myself having flashbacks and crying.

I developed major anxiety and I just wanted to be shut out from the world. I was falling behind in school because I couldn’t concentrate and I was getting in trouble all the time.

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Years later I’ve learned to not only over come what has happened but to not let it consume my life. Therapy has been a major part in helping me overcome what has happened.

I went through a good amount of therapists but I have finally found one who has helped me in the process to over come everything. With out her as my therapist I don’t think that I would have made so much progress. I have learned to use my coping skills and to talk to people when I’m feeling upset.

I now use writing as a way to manage my flashbacks and stress. I also find it helpful to go for walks when I’m having a difficult time dealing with something. Another thing that has really helped me is having people who I can trust.

I finally learned to trust people and let them help me. It was a slow process, but by being around people and getting to know their personality, I have found that not everyone in this world is going to hurt me. I was sick of being the victim and I wanted my life back.

I wanted my life back and I wasn’t going to let everything that has happened bring me down. I took my life back and now I am living my child hood that I should have lived years ago.

My message to everyone who has been through similar things is to find someone you can talk to and tell them what is going on. No one can handle it on their own! Take back what you deserve. Don’t let anyone take away your happiness or your self respect. You’re better than that. Don’t let it happen to someone you know. Be an advocate not only for yourself but for all the children, young adults and adults that you are surrounded by not only today but every day.

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Healing Gods Men

By Healing Gods Men Email: healinggodsmen@gmail.com

Society has taught our men that only weak men shed tears and speak of their pain, and because of this we have hundreds if not thousands of hurting men walking around waiting to burst at the seams with years of pain and tears which they have bottled up within them.

This conditioning of the mind seemed to have worked very well, for men will rarely cry, say I am sorry, speak of their hurts and show any sense of weakness, society has told men if one belonging to your gender cries call him a sissy, if he does not play sports then he is queer, if he is abused then he must be homosexual.

Men are thought to be strong, providers, protectors, and knights in shining Armour while these qualities and virtues are great and should be included in the education of the male, are we as a society only focusing on certain aspects of male development while leaving out some pivotal areas, like emotional and mental grooming.

In this section of the magazine which is dedicated to the men of this world and I decided to call the section “Healing Gods Men� for man was created in the image of God, he was created with a purpose and for a purpose he was created whole and was entrusted to the care of parents and guardians to train, protect, love, respect, care for and to equip with all the life tools and skills so that he can fulfil his destiny.

Many parents and guardians have failed miserable and have become unjust and hateful caretakers, they have given men the life skills and tools of hate, sexual abuse, physical abuse, emotional abuse, they have twisted pure love into something scornful and frightening, and they have marred the vessels and left them broken.

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They have destroyed Gods men so that healing takes a generation. In future articles I will be dealing deal with how men handle abuse, the emotional trauma and mental torment which they experience, as an amateur writer I am in no way downgrading the abuse of women, as abuse perpetrated upon any gender is a criminal act and must never be accepted or excused, however it is a noted fact that men deal differently with the issue of abuse.

Because of societies conditioning of the male mind the man who is abused in many cases will die with that secret, because society says to him if you speak out, you will automatically be classified as weak, a failure and a sissy and somehow, he is automatically labelled homosexual and any other name society can find to plaster upon him, funny how society can build you and also destroy you.

The question which is posed to many male victims is “Why did you allow that to happen?” “you are a man, you are strong, macho, and you should of fight” this question or statement may seem to be a simple one to the individual who is not in the abusive situation, it may seem to demand a straight forward and simple answer however the truth is, it is not as simple as it sounds as there are so many ramifications to this what is termed a simple question or a simple statement.

The reasons why men remain in an abusive relationship or marriage for months and years vary, for each have different situations and circumstances to deal with and face but one of the main reasons why men stay have to do with society and what is expected of the male species. After doing much research I shall give a few reasons of why men stay with an abusive partner.

If you are a male victim of abuse please do not accept societies labelling and stigmas, do not bear the hurt alone for too long you have carried this burden and it has torn you up inside you need to release it, you need to set yourself free the abuse is not your fault.

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Throw away the cloth and the cloak which you have been wearing for your entire life called “I am to blame” “I provoked the abuse” “I was not a proper child” and all the other labels which your invisible cloak has plastered upon it.

Healing will not come in one day you need to get with a counsellor or join a group session where your healing will begin you must begin somewhere, you must take that first step out like a child who is learning to walk for the first time you must launch out and embrace the new feeling of being able to walk and walk freely.

Thank you for reading this article and look forward for our next article as we begin the healing of Gods men and in writing we also continue our healing journey.

You can also drop us a line at : healinggodsmen@gmail.com

Leave the despair behind and accept the healing which you deserve.

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Volunteer Openings O.A.B.I.: VOICES UNITED In GLOBAL Unity against Abuse is inviting you to volunteer with us as we seek to make this world a better place.

We openings for: Journalist Photographers Editors Heads of Organizations Advocates Victims Survivors Authors Researchers Graphic Artist

Send us an email at support@oabivoices.org subject line “Volunteer stating the position which you are interested in, we are looking forward for your email 57

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Refuge of Light Offers a Brighter Future

By Brinda Carey Everyone has faith, even if it is the simple faith that the sun will come out tomorrow. Some have faith that they can be the change they wish to see in the world.

Blessed are those with a deep faith in a God who performs miracles. Missy Zivney, vice-president of refuge of Light, has all these. She believes that tomorrow can be a brighter and more beautiful day than the one before. Making the world a better place isn’t for ‘somebody” to take care of; she grabs it by the horns, and in so doing, relies on God to bless her in her desire to give better tomorrows to girls in East Texas rescued from sex trafficking.

In 2008, three unforgettable events occurred within the space of a year to set Missy Zivney off on a journey of change and healing for young, sexually exploited girls. In August, she heard Gary Haugen, the mission founder and president of International Justice Mission (IJM), speak about the horrible crime of sex trafficking. More than 100,000 children are exploited in the sex trade in the United States every year according to Linda Smith, a former Congresswoman and the founder of Shared Hope International.

In October, while attending Rockamentary, she was introduced to the organization For the Silent. The atrocities these children were subjected to weighed heavily on her mind. Along with her parents, Mike and Norma Mullican, they prayed for God to show them some way that they could help. In the spring, while at a Paul Balesh concert, they again heard of the plight of children being subjected to a world of sexual slavery and deprivation.

The average age of these children is thirteen. Ernie Allen, the president and CEO of the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children told a congressional panel in 2010 that most of the victims of domestic minor sex trafficking are “American kids who initially leave home voluntarily and are being trafficked on main Street USA.” 60

Missy and Norma wrote a children’s book and decided to print a new edition of Collection of Squirrel Tales~Something to Crow About, which contained resources for teachers, and donate the proceeds. Soon afterwards news broke of the Mineola sex ring followed by one article after another, highlighting the need for a regional facility to house, educate, and care for girls who were rescued from this life.

Mike Mullican worked with Kenny and Julie Rigsby from For the Silent with the focus of planning for such a facility for the East Texas area.

Norma and Missy have had meetings with Wellspring Living for Girls in Atlanta, Georgia. The vice-president of this facility, Jenn McEwen, agreed to mentor them in forming a holistic treatment center. The work to bring this dream to fruition was only beginning. These dedicated people have shown determination and strength of spirit as they worked diligently for the past three years to give these girls what they cannot give themselves.

In September of 2010, Refuge of Light became an official non-profit organization…or rather “home”. They are licensed through the Buckner Children’s Home and will provide the girls with a safe place to get an education, receive therapy, and grow to their potential. The program is Christian faith based and volunteers will attend to their spiritual as well as physical needs. Congresswoman, Carolyn Maloney states that there are approximately 50 beds nationwide to address the need of these 100,000 victims. This is unacceptable and…girls need so much more in life than a bed.

Land has been donated to build the facility and fundraisers are being held throughout East Texas to fund this project. Randi Owens has agreed to manage a resale store and Refuge of Light is attempting to secure a location to get it up and running. In the meantime, they are accepting donations of upscale clothing in preparation of the grand opening to hopefully come soon. Missy expresses appreciation for Lori Gazette who has donated some furniture and paintings. Others may volunteer to furnish one of the bedrooms for the girls or contribute other necessary furnishings.

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Mike and Norma Mullican and Missy Zivney have made huge sacrifices for this tremendous cause and give all the glory to God. Now, as in the adage that it takes a village to raise a child, it is up to the rest of us to make our contribution.** Whether it is time, materials, or monetary donations, Missy makes it clear that all are welcome additions and are greatly appreciated. **On the website www.refugeoflight.org, people can learn more about Refuge of Light, make donations via PayPal, or contact them at info@refugeoflight.org.

Brinda Carey isan Advocate for Child Sexual Abuse Survivors and Author of “Don't Cry, Daddy's Here� brinda.carey1@gmail.com http://brindacarey.com/ http://dontcrydaddyshere.com/ https://www.facebook.com/brinda.carey.author P.O. Box 2095 Bentonville, AR 72712

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Drug addicted babies

By Leo G. Alvarez

The illegal use of drugs is prevalent in every Country. It is not exclusive to the United States because it is a money maker for criminals throughout the world, and, of course, they do not have to get a business license or pay taxes. Theirs is a business where they do not have to advertise because business comes to them.

Women, as well as men, use illegal drugs and that is sad, indeed. Sad because so many addicted women sometimes sell their bodies to cover the cost of the drugs. Even Sadder because some do become pregnant.

In my career in law enforcement I managed and worked in a city jail. A big part of our “business” was processing drug addicts. I have always treated women as Ladies until they proved otherwise. I saw nothing but the “otherwise” side of female drug addicts in jail, especially the mothers arrested while their children were with them.

We hope that all parents are filled with love for their children, and these drug addicted mothers profusely, loudly and emotionally expressed that love, and concern, for their children once they found out they would remain in jail and Child Protective Services would take the child(ren).

Then the wrenching sobs and wailing would begin...”I love my children!”

Really? Love them so much that you put them through the drama of separation and being handed over to strangers?

Addicted parents need money for their drugs. They will miss meals and let an apartment or house go un-cleaned in order to be able to afford and use drugs. And when under the influence, “High” as they call it, they totally and unselfishly focus on themselves. They are unable to care for themselves or others. If there are children in the household they will be left in their unclean diapers or clothes and left to eat whatever may be available. If they are infants or toddlers their situation is horrific. And this is love? The only love this displays is an unselfish need for satisfying a craving and, yes, a need for an addictive drug. The attitude, quite simply, is “…to hell with all else, I need my drugs”.

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That is not the worst. These unselfish people have little tolerance for a whining or crying child. Some will even use children as sex toys, or toss them up in the air or across a room and that is not over dramatization.

They may not sadists but they express their anger and frustration on the most defenseless of human, and they display little remorse.

There is no one more selfish than a drug addict. A pregnant addict is no different. During pregnancy, rather than suffer through the pain and anxiety of withdrawals some women will continue to take drugs throughout their pregnancy and until they are about to deliver.

Let me put this in perspective for you. If I inject you with a drug or make you take a drug without your permission I have committed a crime, an assault. It is that simple. But if you are a pregnant woman and choose to take drugs during a pregnancy no crime is committed. It may be a crime (it is often called a victimless crime) to be under the influence of drugs, but it is no crime to cause the fetus to become an addict, in fact, you can even choose to abort the child.

There is no escaping the fact that the child will be born addicted and if the drugs are not continued the child will go through the same excruciating pain of adult drug withdrawals. There is always the possibility of death while in withdrawals, but if the child is born in a hospital it will be monitored throughout the withdrawal period. In California, that is assured.

In too many instances before a certain law was passed in California, women would leave their newborns on people’s porches or simply throw the child in a trash bin if they did not want it. A child is truly a burden to a drug addict. Not only is it one more mouth to feed, it demands, through its crying, care and attention 24 hours a day, and then there is the expense of raising the child. Drug addicts need their money for drugs But because too many abandoned infants were dying, California law makers thought they could fix the problem by passing a law.

California Penal Code Section11165.13 somewhat covers this situation because it relates to an addicted mother and child. It is addressed to medical personnel who assist at a child’s birth.

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As in most States, medical personnel are mandated reporters, meaning that they must report child abuse and neglect to law enforcement. This law changes all that. It says, “…a positive toxicology screen at the time of the delivery of an infant is not in and of itself a sufficient basis for reporting child abuse or neglect. In other words, if it is determined that the child is born drug addicted it does not constitute reportable child abuse or neglect.

It goes on to say, “However, any indication of maternal substance abuse shall lead to an assessment of the need of the mother and child… If other factors are present that indicate risk to a child, then a report shall be made. However, a report based on risk to a child which relates solely to the inability of the parent to provide the child with regular care due to the parent’s substance abuse shall be made only to a county welfare or probation department, and not to a law enforcement agency.” The law acknowledges that the parent possibly will be unable to give the child regular care because of her drug addiction. In short, medical personnel can not report the crime, but must call a social worker.

Social workers will be the only ones who will know that a drug addicted baby has been born. Social Worker’s sole purpose for existing is to help families and children. In this case they will permit mother and child to go “home” not facing any arrest. They will then assist the family with counseling and programs intended to help the mother with her drug problem while she raises the child and her other children, if any. It is a very nice, optimistic, rosy, situation to contemplate. In truth, a woman who cared little for the life she helped create and nurture in her body is now taking home a drug addicted infant while she is also drug addicted. One problem taking home a new “problem” to deal with. And to an addict a child is a great obstacle to their lifestyle. Who do you think will suffer the greatest?

Drug addicted women are likely to have poor nutrition throughout their pregnancy. These parents are 40% more likely to physically and sexually abuse a child (Missouri government report http://www.dss.mo.gov/cd/ info/cwmanual/section7/ch1_33/sec7ch8.htm).

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Simply because they devote so much of their time securing money to purchase the drugs and then more time under the influence of the drugs, therefore leaving little time for child rearing.

At the same time the child demands attention through the only method available to it, crying all while the drug addicted parent has to deal with her addiction. To any normal parent an infant’s demanding cries can become annoying, but the normal parent learns to cope and attend to those cries. But a drug addicted parent has to deal with /her own irritability and physical and emotional craving and demands for their drug of choice while coping with a crying child with its own needs, but, incapable of satisfying them.

A drug addicted baby is likely to experience tremors, sweating, difficulty in sucking and swallowing, fever and seizures as its cries become screams. A crying child only adds frustration, chaos and anger to the already uncomfortable and irritating physical craving that the addicted parent is also going through. It is no wonder that these frustrations are taken out on the child.

It begs the questions, why do these people continue to have children? A better question would be why do social workers work so hard at keeping babies with drug addicted mothers since fathers are usually not in the picture and finances are tight? Against all reason, why is there a belief that a child should remain with such a parent while the mother fights a demanding drug addiction while trying to cope with an equally demanding infant? Most of us see that this is not a reasonable situation.

In the United States there are people in high positions that strongly believe in family preservation, as we all do. Most of us maintain strong ties within our family. We want to believe that our family, despite ups and downs, is a great if not the best family. And usually that is true even if every family does have its own “unusual” characters. But we know that is not true of every family. There are those “other” families.

Family preservationists strongly believe that every child should be raised by its parents regardless of whether the parents abuse or neglect their children. They believe that these parent’s personalities and beliefs can be changed to make them better parents.

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They will tell you that to remove a child from its parents will cause a child emotional problems. I will tell them that I would rather take that child to counseling than to someday visit their grave. They will tell you that to put that child in foster care exposes that child to possibly being killed. I will tell them that Foster parents account for less than 1% of child killers while mothers alone are 27% of child killers and fathers are 17%. That is reality, as opposed to wishful thinking.

The same cited Missouri report indicates that pregnant addicts tend to have low self-esteem, limited family support (most addicts began their criminal career by stealing from family members and friends), a limited education with fewer job skills and therefore less likely to be employed or be able to afford adequate housing for a family. Since social and parenting skills are learned through exposure it is quite likely that they may have been raised by parents with little parenting skills. It is a known fact, proven statistically, that 33% of abused children become abusive parents.

You do become what you see and hear and so you can understand why these people in turn become poor parents..

When speaking to groups I will sometimes remind them that no infant is delivered to their parents with a parenting manual. Nor is anyone taught in any school on how to be a good parent. It has always been left up to each set of parents to raise a child as best they can with little or no advice on how to handle a colicky, fretful, crying and kicking baby who cannot vocalize the reason for its discomfort.

Most parents react quickly to a crying child. At one time it was believed that to permit a baby to cry strengthened its lungs as well as taught it patience. That is no longer the case. But just how do you react to the cries and screams of a drug addicted baby? The Doctors, an NBC television daily show, had a segment on drug addicted babies. This is the link: http://www.hivvids.com/4660/Struggles_of_Drug-Addicted_Babies.htm.

Viewing this will give you an insight to what drug addicted babies look like, sound like, and go through. It is not pretty.

Drug withdrawal is not just 48 hours of pain and then you’re fine. It can continue for weeks or months with the end result that you are still an addict.

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And, kept in that atmosphere by its drug addicted parents it is very likely that a drug addicted child will follow in its parent’s footsteps into an early life of crime, continuing the cycle of being on welfare, unemployable, and a burden on society.

Now that you know the problem will you take the time to think of what your role is on this problem? As a human being with this knowledge it is your responsibility to see that laws are in place that ensure that such children get the support and education to help them secure self-esteem, confidence, and knowledge that will enable them to stay away from drugs and the bad influences that surround them. We must also answer the question of whether drug addicted parents should be permitted to have and raise children, shocking as that thought may be. But there is no question that it is totally unfair for anyone to subject another human being to such torture and a future of possible never ending misery. It is time to leave your comfort zone.

Leo Alvarez retired from the Oxnard California Police Department in 2003 after a 33 year career in which he investigated crimes, processed crime scenes, attended autopsies, and managed, supervised, and worked in the jail for 25 years. He had previously been a Coroner’s Investigator.

He is the President and co-founder of the National Association Against Child Cruelty (http://www.thechildrenswalloftears.org/ ) which has designed and is constructing The Children’s Wall of Tears ™ a traveling memorial to children killed through abuse and neglect. The American virtual wall containing over 3000 names can be seen on the website, as well as an international Wall of Tears containing over 200 names.

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Dr. David A. Crenshaw earned a Ph.D. from Washington University in St. Louis, MO. He is a licensed psychologist in New York. Dr. Crenshaw has the distinction of being Board Certified in Clinical Psychology by the American Board of Professional Psychology (ABPP)and a Fellow of the Academy of Clinical Psychology. He is a Registered Play Therapist-Supervisor by the Association of Play Therapy. He is listed in the National Register of Health Service Providers in Psychology.

He is Past President of the New York Association for Play Therapy. His memberships have included the American Psychological Association, the New York State Psychological Association, and the Hudson Valley Psychological Association. Dr. Crenshaw has served on the Legislative Committee of the New York State Psychological Association. Dr. Crenshaw is in private practice since 1977. In addition, he has been the Clinical Director, Director of Training, and Director of Internship Training at the Astor Home for Children in Rhinebeck, NY; on the staff of hospitals and schools; faculty member at Southern Illinois University, University of Missouri, and Washington University; and a consultant at Bard College.

Besides numerous articles in professional journals, Dr. Crenshaw is the author of several books: "Bereavement: Counselling the Grieving throughout the Life Cycle" (now in its third printing); "Engaging Resistant Children in Therapy: Projective Drawing and Storytelling Techniques," and two books (he co-authored with John B. Mordock, Ph.D., ABPP to be published by Jason Aronson in 2005), "Understanding and Treating Aggressive Children: Fawns in Gorilla Suits" and "Handbook of Play Therapy with Aggressive Children." He is featured on a videotape "Grief: How to Help Children Feel, Deal & Heal" containing practical advice. Dr. Crenshaw's play therapy and projective techniques using drawings and storytelling and puppets are especially designed for defiant, oppositional, and aggressive children.

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Frustrated by the challenges of helping defiant, oppositional, aggressive children? Dr. David A. Crenshaw shares successful techniques he has developed during more than 30 years as a clinical child psychologist.

Chronically angry children may look like strong, fearless gorillas on the outside. Inside, they are like fearful, wary fawns at the edge of the woods. They crave contact with others, but fear being hurt again.

They may have been hurt by loss, whether by divorce or death, and are struggling with grief. They may have been hurt by violence and abuse. Perhaps, they never had a secure family life to develop trust early on.

The art of healing fawns in gorilla suits requires not taking their anger personally, but realizing anger is how they protect themselves. They hurt deep inside from invisible, yet very real wounds. To help such children feel safe, become trusting, and deal with intense emotions, Dr. Crenshaw developed special play therapy techniques. He teaches his techniques to clinicians, school personnel, and others who work with angry children.

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Dr. David A. Crenshaw is a highly credentialed and respected clinical psychologist, who is Past President of the New York Association of Play Therapy. He has dedicated his career, Center, books, videotape, projective techniques, and leadership to helping aggressive children.

He and his Rhinebeck Child and Family Center, LLC are available for: Child and Family Therapy  Consultations  Training  Presentations  Workshops Broadcast and Print Media Interviews 

Mailing Address

Office Address

P.O. Box 286 Rhinebeck, NY 12572

23H East Market St.Rhinebeck, NY 12572

Phone: (845) 876-3400

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"Development of a Healthy Sense of Self in Children"

By David A. Crenshaw, Ph.D., ABPP

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Children strive to find their niche, their place in the world where they can feel significant. They need to feel they belong and have something to contribute to their social world including their family.

When healthy and positive paths to a sense of self are blocked, children may develop a distorted or deviant sense of self. In this case the child will make their mark and derive a sense of importance from behaviours that may be disruptive and have a negative impact in their interpersonal world.

The late psychoanalyst Walter Bonime (1989) described the development of the sense of self, "Children who are frustrated in their efforts to develop a positive and healthy sense of self will make their mark in some, often disturbing, way. It may be necessary for the child to terrorize, bully or see people frightened, worried, crying, at their wits' end. Such a child may have to be first, to be captain all the time.

The child may have to rebel against coercion, refuse to do anything expected of him or her, or insist on doing everything that is forbidden� (p.

136). The implication is that every child needs to feel significant in one way or another. If they can’t make their mark in some positive way, they will distinguish themselves in a deviant or distorted way.

Some children may be so discouraged in their efforts to establish a positive sense of self; they choose to distinguish themselves by being the meanest bully on the block. Others will make their mark in other distorted or deviant ways perhaps by being the class clown or by becoming a world -class martyr. No child starts out with the goal of developing a deviant or distorted sense of self. These are children who are discouraged and believe that the path to a more positive sense of self is blocked. As parents and teachers it is crucial that we notice these barriers and assist and encourage the child to overcome them.

It is essential that we identify their individual and specific talents, strengths, interests, and positive personal qualities and look for opportunities to highlight these assets in children.

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Every child has something that he or she can uniquely contribute to the world around them and it is vital that parents, teachers, counsellors and helpers of all kinds be diligent and determined in delineating these positive attributes. The acting-out child is almost always a very discouraged child who feels defeated in his or her efforts to make a positive impact on their interpersonal world.

One of the stories I developed in the book: Engaging Resistant Children in Therapy is called "The Ballistic Stallion." It is about a girl, Sally, who was determined to ride a horse that her father had decided to sell because no one could ride it since it was so wild. As a result of her courage and determination she finally succeeded in riding the stallion in time to prevent her dad from selling the horse.

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I then ask the kids to think of a time when they succeeded in "overcoming the odds," when they did something that took courage and determination that perhaps no one thought they would be able to do, like the first time they went off the high diving board. Every child has a story to tell about such a moment in her/his life. We should ask for these stories and listen carefully and we will come away with fresh appreciation for the strengths of the child.

Bonime, W. (1989). Collaborative psychoanalysis. Cranbury, NJ: Associated Universities Press.

Copyright Š 2006 by David A. Crenshaw, Ph.D., ABPP. All rights reserved.

Please go to Dr. David A. Crenshaw’s website and donate to the wonderful work which he and his staff is doing in helping children heal. http://www.childtherapytechniques.com/

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Without medication she will die.

What would you do, if it were your child?

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A mother’s fight for the life of her child.

By Dr. Ariel R. King, MPH, MBA, PhD, DTM&H “With all my heart, with all my soul, with all my might, I pray for the health of this child. I pray for it to be perfect in mind and body. To guide safely and easily from me at the proper time…..”

Ariana-Leilani, means “holy one sent from heaven” was born in May 2003 to an “elderly” 41 year old mommy who had prepared waited for you most of her life. After fighting to stay and grow in my nurturing warm safe womb. You were born very small, but alert. From your very day of life, you insisted on seeing everything and greeting the world with love.

Now you are very sick, even though you look healthy. Now with an untreated very rare blood and bone marrow disease, you still believe in humanity and good people, you are a “positive and happy” child. Your life is unnecessarily at risk, since you are being denied the only medicine to avoid a bone marrow transplant, Loss of limbs or death. Yet you look normal, healthy and happy. Looks can be deceptive.

“To grow steadily and sturdily, In a home filled with joy at its presence, To be nurtured into a person who greets the world with Passion, Enthusiasm, dance, love, humility, and faith.”

Ariana-Leilani, Sweetness, and kindness, loving and positive – you are the humanity at its best. Saving your life is to save the best in us. Our ability to fulfill your need for life-saving medicine and medical care is the mirror to our humanity.

“With all my heart, with all my soul with all my might, I pray for the health of this world. I beg its leaders to temper their insanity with reason, so that my child never knows the pain and absurdity of warfare. Let it take pare the dances of peace.”

—Adapted from a prayer written by Rabbi Judy Shanks 83

Ariana-Leilani, with all my heart, with all my soul, with all my might, I pray for strength and courage for you, and I, and others to fight for your life.

Please help fight for Ariana-Leilani to get life-saving medicine and medical care by signing her petition at http://www.ariana-leilani.com Thank you for this blessing.

With love, Ariel Dr. Ariel R. King, MPH, MBA, PhD, DTM&H President, Ariel Consulting International www.ArielConsult.com President, Ariel Foundation International www.ArielFoundation.org U-Tube Channel: Arielfoundation Skype: Ariel Foundation International Tel: +1-202-470-0193 (USA) Tel: +41 22 534 94 41 (Switzerland) Email: arking@arielfoundation.org DrArielKing@yahoo.com

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Ariana-Leilani Dance Upon My Heart (Yishibah, United Kingdom, 2010) Dance upon my heart, with each rhythmic beat, Little “Ariana-Leilani my darling, those nimble feet; Blow upon my face, with each breath you exhale, Refreshing my spirit daily without fail………

Sent from the cosmos, the Divine will to speak, of childhood injustices of others so weak.

Power of prayer, Divine destiny calls, uniting the generations from the ancestoral hall.

Pain, Prayer, power and Praise!

Eternal, global, this little ” Ambassador” is raised, What Divine appointment this matriarchal tree, Not just about Ariana-Leiaini and me.

HalleluYah! HalleluYah! Praises we sing, Mother and Father link chain in the universal ring; HalleluYah! HalleluYah! ring-ting-a-ling, Cosmic HalleluYahs peace and healing they bring!

- Yishibah 2010 (United Kingdom)

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We discus a variety of topics.

Click the follow button on our show page, click the like button to keep informed about upcoming shows.

http://www.blogtalkradio.co

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Wednesday Every Thursday 87 Morning

Listen to Archive shows and get informed, Breaking the silence is not a popular choice but it is the right choice.

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RAZING HELL The Nikki Wells story It’s funny how life is. At times it’s been so bad, full of darkness and hopelessness and other times I feel like the luckiest woman alive.

The rollercoaster of my life began at age 10. It wasn’t meant to be such a rollercoaster ride, except for the fact that a little, angry Irish priest arrived in our parish. I didn’t know it then, but life as mine should have been would change forever.

The next few years I was physically and emotionally tortured by this evil man. The next few decades I was trapped in my own cold, dark prison of symptoms and side affects which slowly disintegrated what was left of me prior to meeting him.

I have been razing hell in many ways for 3 decades now – so it is apt that this film documenting my story is named “Razing Hell”.

The tumultuous ride which has been my life was fraught with anger, substance abuse, joblessness, divorce (2 of them), depression, desire for suicide, fear of the world, inconsolable sadness, homelessness, career success and failure, loneliness and utter confusion.

My emotional scars I hid as best I could. People thought I was eccentric, vivacious, rambunctious – these were the personas I created to hide heartwrenching pain. I did the best I could to show a confident, outgoing, successful lady to the world, whilst at home where I was safe, nobody could harm me and I spent my time alone crying and longing for the pain and torture to end.

I attempted to dull my pain of living by self-medicating – everything from the standard drugs and alcohol, to obsessively exercising and binge eating. Sadly nothing did, or does dull my pain.

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I lost all my friends. My anger and my fear drove everyone who attempted to get close to me away. For good. My existence has been excruciatingly lonely – but subconsciously I thought I was safe from anyone else harming me. I was so terrified of people and never connected the reasons why.

My physical scars I will carry forever. Often people ask about my “pigmentation” – unwittingly pointing out the pain I’ve lived every second of every day for more than 3 decades. These scars will never fade.

The utter sadness at a childhood lost, and adult life never to meet it full potential still bring me to tears almost daily, however I am learning to live with these scars.

I first met Kylee a couple of years ago. She is the incredible power behind Razing Hell, the film. We were told we wouldn’t get along. I now consider her one of my closest friends and trust Kylee with things I never trusted anyone else with. She knows me inside and out. She doesn’t judge me. She knows what to say, when to say it and how to say it. She tolerates my moods and tells me exactly how it is.

Before Kylee and I met, she had never met someone “like me” before.

Child abuse had never touched Kylee’s life thankfully, so I led her into an abyss or horror. At times she cries at the sadness she sees in survivors eyes. Sometimes she just hugs me and I know what she is thinking. I know that she will never completely understand the pain of me and the other survivors she meets – but Kylee has an empathy which is really indescribable.

Throughout the past couple of years there have been many twists and turns in my life and in the story of my fight for justice. I have cornered the Papal Nuncio requesting a meeting with the pope.

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I have sat in George Pell’s office and demanded justice for all victims and a public apology. I have discovered a friendship between the man who assaulted me and the current Attorney General. I have been embroiled in a public media debate on whether the Attorney General should be sacked.

I have spoken in Parliament House in order to have laws changed enabling catholic victims to sue the church. I have spent days in bed crying and never wanting to wake up. I have told my parents for the first time about my abuse. And this is just a small fraction of what Kylee and I have been through together – not just as a director and subject, but as friends and confidants.

Nikki with Tom Doyle

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Nikki trying to make Kylee the producer of RAZING HELL look neat!

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The Two of Us – Kylee Ingram Producer – Razing Hell Nikki’s story had come to us via another producer who had met Nikki and loved her story but she worked for a large commercial production house that was not likely to produce a one off indie story so she passed the story along to us.

My business partner met Nikki first and she rushed to organize a meeting for Nikki and I as it was important to start filming immediately - and without a budget I would have to do the filming. I remember that the time my partner guessing that Nikki and I would not get along – “you two are too different”, but she was wrong. Nikki and I hit it off like a house on fire and I have loved Nikki from the moment we met.

The topics of child abuse, sexual assault and pedophilia had been reserved for political or social debate amongst my friends and family. I really had not met or did not know I had met people who were the survivors of abuse.

One of Nikki’s greatest anthems is that we need to start talking about abuse, or we won’t be able to change the system. Nikki is amazingly articulate and is able to stand her ground against some incredibly intimidating characters. Obviously she has been motivated by her childhood experiences where her Catholic Priest abused her but she is focused on the bigger picture. Nikki is determined to fill the holes she sees in the support and services that are available to survivors.

Nikki used the compensation she received from the Catholic Church to start Project KidSafe she works with survivors daily to try and get them the help they need. One of her long-term projects is to establish the Sunrise Centre where survivors of abuse can come and stay to heal.

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She has also been working with the university in Queensland to develop educational materials for people who provide services to survivors like the police, social workers etc.

We hope the documentary will also shed light on the work Nikki has been doing with the political parties to change state laws so the Catholic Church is an entity that can be sued (which it currently is not). Nikki is also working in the school systems to create new educational curriculum that steers away from the “stranger danger� education we have in Australia, which does not adequately educate on or prevent abuse. The most recent issue we are looking at in the documentary is the connection between abuse and suicide. Nikki describes growing up thinking and accepting that teenagers commit suicide, because that is what she felt like doing and she saw so many kids around her take their lives.

I have come to love and respect Nikki. She is a force to be reckoned with, she really does take the fight to the top to try and gain rights for all survivors. I also know that there is still that vulnerable child in Nikki who is scared and continues to doubt herself. The scars of abuse are deep and there are many times I have put down the camera to give her a hug.

There are a couple of times when filming we have known Nikki was going to break down - so we concocted a plan. In one instance she was doing an interview for one of our national commercial channels and they were showing her the footage they had taken of her perpetrator. Nikki really did not want to cry in this interview so I sat behind her chair filming the reverse angle – she knew where I was and when the tears started she spun around and I stood up in their shot. They were not happy but Nikki was able to appear strong for the cameras.

The most confronting times filming for me was when I traveled with Nikki to Washington DC to a conference where over 300 survivors of abuse by the Catholic Church were gathered.

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The stories were horrific, I was shocked out of naivety and I was incredibly moved by the courage and fortitude of the survivors. Throughout the week I felt waves of anger towards those who had taken away the lives the people they should have been protecting.

I was also in the back of the car filming the day Nikki had to tell her parents. I tried to visualize what it would be like telling my mother and it almost brought me to tears. I could tell Nikki was only just holding it together but she knew she had to do this so she could be the face of the Project KidSafe campaign.

Nikki often says that ironically this has become her calling in life. She is perfect for the role, articulate, funny and unrelenting. One interview we did in Tasmania was with a mother whose son was abused by her brother/ his uncle. This poor woman was distraught she thought that her son’s life was over. During her brother’s arrest and subsequent trail she was unable find any support. She described finding herself swimming in a sea of cold bureaucracy that left her feeling hopeless. Her face came alive the moment describes the moment she found Nikki, someone who understood and could help. She believes that Nikki has given her and her son a future.

On screen Nikki is immaculately dressed and exudes wonderful blend of action and humour, which gives a mainstream audience an access point for this dark topic. Since meeting Nikki I realize how wrong I was about not knowing anyone who had been abused. So many of my friends and colleagues have come forward to share their stories with me and asked me to thank Nikki for the stand she has taken.

We have also upset a few of my Catholic friends who think we are church bashing but the church has made themselves part of this story by not adequately dealing with survivors of abuse. I have invited these friends to watch the videos - there is nothing in our messaging or interviews that I think is unreasonable.

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We also have members of the church making comment and I would be happy to interview others. But I do think that it is time the church becomes accountable and transparent much in the same way other organization ‘s are required to be.

We took a teaser of Nikki’s film to Australian broadcasters (there are only two who would take this kind of documentary) but neither channel are currently commissioning one-off hour documentaries. So we thought why not make a feature length international documentary and see if we can gain support from the public to see this film finished?

Each week we have been loading new short clips from the documentaries.

Some of the faces will be familiar for American audiences like Tom Doyle and Jeff Anderson. We have uploaded the clip of Nikki telling her parents and we will show a clip of her perpetrator finally being arrested after 35 years.

We hope to raise $30,000 so we can finish editing the film. We will be hosting film nights and much more. We are asking people to join our campaign and become Hell Razers and help us spread the word: www.indiegogo.com/razinghell Help us make a film to raise awareness about childhood abuse with Project KidSafe’s Nikkki Wells.

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Meet a woman on the front line Nikki Wells made her name as an incredibly successful businesswoman: the infamous owner of the exclusive dating organisation Millionaire Matchmaker.

Glam and feisty, it’s easy to see how she built a business empire.

She was about to make a television pilot of what went on to be an American hit, when she had a ‘stroke’ while having lunch with the production company. She ended up in hospital.

That’s when she discovered it wasn’t a stroke, although the paralysis was real. Finally, she joined up the dots...

She had been abused by her local priest for years as a child and never dealt with it. The paralysis was stress related.

This was in 2006 when Nikki was 37. She is now 43 and her life has changed completely.

Nikki has become a one-woman whirlwind and she won’t stop until she reforms the Catholic Church. She’s had an apology. She’s had money. But what she wants is a new future for abuse survivors across the world.

Nikki’s already received $100,000 compensation, but the interesting stuff starts this year.

The priest who abused her is about to be charged: he’s still living in the community at West Ryde. She’s going to be there when he’s arrested and film it. It’ll be the first time she’s confronted him. Then she’s going to follow the case through court.

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In the meantime, she’s used her pay out to start an organisation called Project KidSafe Foundation for all victims of child abuse and to help protect kids today. She’s put every penny of her worldly goods into this and lives and breathes it.

She’s currently taking civil action against eight separate entities of the Catholic Church – in Australia and abroad. She’s planning to prove that the Catholic Church in Ireland and their superiors in the Vatican were culpable in her abuse. She’s gathering evidence that they knew the priest who molested her was a pedophile from the outset of his career in Ireland, and tried to manage the ‘problem’ by sending him to Australia.

If she succeeds, she’ll open the floodgates for claims from around the world. She’s armed and dangerous. Some of her cohort of internationally renowned advisors are ex-Catholic Priest and Canon Law expert, Tom Doyle – who first ‘broke’ the issue of child abuse in the Church – and American trial attorney Jeff Anderson – the legal scourge of the Catholic Church in the US. Together they call themselves the “unholy trinity”.

Nikki sleeps with her laptop and starts working the minute she wakes: evangelical is an understatement. In short, all her extraordinary drive has turned on the Catholic Church and she’s determined to make them mend their ways. She’s not worried they are the most powerful organisation in the world, and she’s one person. She’s just waltzed in and demanded they give her $2.5 million to build a trauma recovery education centre, and they haven’t said no. It will be the first dedicated centre for survivors of sexual abuse in the world – the first, she hopes, of many. She’s already found the perfect site in Arcadia, on the outskirts of Sydney. It’s an idyllic 200- acre block – owned, of course, by the Catholic Church – and she’s going to ask them for twenty acres of it.

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Her goal is to see it secured and the first spade turned by the end of this year (2012).

But there are still some huge emotional milestones to overcome along the way. Nikki says she’s not angry any more, just determined to hold the Church to account and take responsibility, however she can. She’s feisty and fierce; honest and emotionally candid. If you can imagine a positive story about child abuse: this is it. Nikki’s Journey is the inside story of one woman’s crusade – gritty, tough, moving and often very funny – as it unfolds. It’s going to be one hell of a ride. This is your chance to help us tell Nikki's story.

The production so far: We have been filming with Nikki for over a year Nikki has an infectious personality loaded with a quick wit and selfdeprecating sense of humour. Nikki really is going to Raze Hell.

Child abuse is such a sad and dark subject yet Nikki is a beacon of light who shares her can-do enthusiasm and humour with all she meets. She is also immensely glamorous – and not afraid of fronting up to anyone. We have followed her as she tells paedophiles to watch out because she is coming after them. But we have also seen the other side of Nikki’s brave persona, the vulnerable nine-year-old who was abused by her priest. That other side adds to our sense of Nikki’s extraordinary courage and chutzpah. She is a very multi-dimensional and layered character.

A couple of years back I was watching the documentary Deliver Us From Evil. It is a chilling and harrowing tale of the defrocked priest Oliver O'Grady’s 30 year long history of sexual abuse on children in his parishes. The Catholic Church dealt with him by moving him from parish to parish. We see Nikki's story as the next chapter in this larger tale as she works with international lawyers to hold paedophiles' and those that protect them accountable.

Nikki is on the front line doing everything she can to make sure children are no longer abused and help victims reclaim the lives that were stolen from them.

We really hope you enjoy getting to know Nikki as much as we have.

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Julie’s Corner: I am grateful to Sherna Benjamin for giving me space in her new magazine to write. I have so much to say on abuse, domestic violence, power and control. Sherna has provided me with two outlets to speak; blog talk radio and now the O.A.B.I Voices United in Global Unity against Abuse magazine. I am very grateful to have space to share my thoughts, guide other’s to safety, protect the children, and rescue people from abuse.

There is so much work to be done in this area but Sherna is opening doors and breaking down hundred’s of years’ of silence. I am confident we are raising a generation of children that will know what to do if they are abused. They will know how to get help, how to “Tell today and get away.” as Erin Merryn says. This generation of children will approach teachers, hairdressers, veterinarians, preachers, bus drivers and doctors to get the help their family needs.

All of these professions are mandatory reporters in North America which means they must report to law enforcement or social service if they “suspect a child is being abused.” After I get done training/empowering all of the children they will tell, they will get help, get to higher ground, they will save their mother’s and other family members from abuse. This new generation will never have lived in a world where abuse was tolerated, underreported, and accepted. This generation will not be drinking abuse the way earlier generations have.

The Kool-Aid has been passed around to too many families. Children are growing up in abuse, hooked on the silent Kool-Aid, and finding the beverage again in their adult relationships. The largest predictor of experiencing domestic violence as an adult is encountering child abuse as a child. Child abuse can be; witnessing domestic violence, being physically abused, being sexually abused, being emotionally abused.

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If parents continue to tolerate abuse of any kind in their homes they are grooming their children to accept domestic violence. Unsacred people with their self-esteems fully intact do not accept abuse. If abuse happens once to someone who is not accustomed to their soul being trampled on, they will most likely leave. Domestic Violence can happen to anyone.

But there is a huge difference between one isolated incident and years of abuse.

After multiple years of abuse a person is powerless to leave because the emotional abuse has eroded their self-esteem so much that their wings have been clipped. It is always and option to leave “With God all things are possible.� Matthew 19:26 but there are more hurdles to cross.

How much simpler to live in a society where children are educated about abuse and what to do if they do encounter danger.

Parents need to begin talking to their young children about abuse and body safety. The average age children are approached by a perpetuator is at 4 years of age. This problem can not be passed off to the public schools, all though their support is always welcome. Children are being approached before they enter Kindergarten.

Parents can take the following steps to protect their children from unwanted touch: *Start talking to your child about unwanted touch before they are verbal.

If this is information they always have, it resonates with their soul. They will understand what you are saying even if they can not talk. Think of listening to a foreign language, you understand many words but speaking is difficult. *Tell children repeatedly that you want to know if someone touches them in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable. This someone can be anyone that you family knows, no one is off limits from being the someone.

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*Tell children that they will not be in trouble for telling. In fact they will be celebrated if they do report inappropriate touch. *NEVER say to your child “I have known them forever, they would not do that.” This is the most damaging thing you can say to your child if they report unwanted touch. If your child is reporting unwanted touch they have been touched inappropriately. Now is your time to intervene, if you choose. If parents choose not to intervene, the consequences for you and your child are grave. *Tell children any area a swimsuit covers is the area that should be off limits to touch. But you also want to know if anything happens that makes your child feel uncomfortable, even if their swimsuit areas have not been touched. *Do not wait, begin the conversation today, you will not regret it. *Read my children’s book on body safety for ages 0-6 years “Some Parts are Not for Sharing” at www.juliefederico.com Thank you for reading this article, if you liked it please share it with a friend. I want to educate all children. Thank you for protecting your children.

Julie Federico is a child advocate and children’s author. She can be reached at juliefederico@oabivoices.org

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Great Reads: “Anger is OKAY, Violence is NOT, written by Julie Federico and illustrated by Glori Alexander, is a thoughtful, much-needed addition to preschool teachers’, social workers’, and libraries. With vibrant, TV-cartoonlike illustrations and simple, direct text appropriate for even the youngest children, this picture book explores the complexity and vitality of anger, and when it is appropriately expressed and when it is not.

True emotional intelligence is something recognized and respected but rarely taught and discussed, even among adults. The goal of this worthy project is to engage children in a safe, non-threatening exploration of complicated, often-frightening feelings. Federico lets kids know that anger is normal, though managing its expression can be complicated.

Clear language and child-friendly art invite a direct, straightforward examination of when anger is appropriate and how to safely express it through art, physical activity, tears. What’s not OK is hitting, biting, throwing and hurting. The book gently and clearly reminds its vulnerable audience that adults can find the journey just as tricky as children do. If an adult hurts a child or someone they love, Federico instructs her young readers that telling a trusted adult is a safe and right action for them to take. Needless to say, this is complex emotional territory, and Federico’s tone is perfect: even, loving, simple, clear. Educators and caregivers may well find this a helpful tool in eliciting important conversations, and the book includes contact information for The National Domestic Violence Hotline and other respected sources of support.”

Written by Blue Ink Review Some Parts are Not for Sharing is Julie Federico’s first book. This book is for children 0-7 years old and is a child’s first book on body safety.

This book introduces children to the important conversation of personal boundaries. Friendly fish are used to teach children about body safety and what to do if someone violates your safety. The book is nonthreatening and wonderfully introduces a very difficult subject. The entire book can be read or ordered at www.juliefederico.com. This book is also available in Spanish.

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When JUSTICE turns on those it swore to protect.

By Angela Hello. My name is Angela. I am fifteen years old, and this is the story of my life. All names, except mine, have been substituted with letters or general nouns to preserve anonymity since my case is still open. All expletives have been edited out of quotes; some things were not said as "politely" as the appear here.

Trapped - that's the only word that could describe my childhood. I was ten years old, and my parents were getting divorced. I wanted to live with my mom, but we had nowhere to live. My mom didn't have a job, and she didn't have any money to her name. We would go live with family, but M didn't want us near my mom's family. I didn't want to live with M, because he was very abusive towards me - he would always hit me, slap me, or beat me (sometimes until I was unconscious). He even beat up my mom in front of me on multiple occasions. I guess we had to take our only option - to live in another house M owned.

You might be wondering who "M" is. Well, "M" is my biological father.

He was never a father to me, in fact, he was the exact opposite. M became my only enemy. After my mom and I moved into the house that he owned, we took a sigh of relief. "Free," I thought, "free from him‌ Not completely free, but we're getting there." The house we moved into was a five minute walk from his house; M had plenty of other houses in multiple places, but he wanted us to move into this one. We lived in that house for two years.

September 23rd, 2008. I will never forget that day. I was in sixth grade English class, and we were assigned to write in our journals. The assignment was to write something that would make you happy - most kids wrote about fame, fortune, or superpowers. I, however, wrote about killing my biological father.

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I shared it with the class, and they all laughed as I described throwing him out a second-story window, only to watch him fall to his painful death. The teacher was the only one that didn't laugh. I was sent to the guidance counsellor's office immediately, and my parents were called into school.

The guidance counsellor asked why I wrote it. I said, "Well, my childhood hasn't been the happiest‌ because of him." "What has he done to you?" she asked I then went on to describe multiple occasions on which he had slapped, beaten, punched, and violently yelled at me. The punishments were for things as slight as eating too fast or too slow, getting a 97% on a test instead of a 100%, and even crying after he had beaten me.

Sometimes he would beat me for no reason. The guidance counsellor then told my mom that I was in crisis. My mom asked the counsellor what she should do, and the guidance counsellor suggested that she take me home.

Later that night, M called me. He said, "I can't believe you would do that to me. You're a pig, a slob, you're stupid, and you'll never amount to anything. You'll wish that you never wrote that about me when you can't get into college because you're too stupid, and you need a place to live. Well, you can live on the street with your mother. You know why? Because your mother's a whore." I'll never forget that conversation. There was something else he said, too, right before I hung up on him.

"I'll burn your grandparents' house down, and I'll burn your cousin's house down, too. With everyone in them. You'll have no one to go to but me." I couldn't imagine living without my family - my maternal family.

Even though M said that I wasn't allowed to see them, I still loved them. I panicked and told my mom what he said.

About an hour after he called, he came to my mom's house. We sat out on the deck, and he yelled at me. He said that I would live with him, and he would home school me. I would have no phone, no computer, and I would not be allowed to see my friends or family.

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My mom said that it was too extreme of a punishment, and that it's not in my best interest. Then M screamed out: "I don't care about her best interest!" He grabbed my hand, and tried to drag me down the deck stairs. He then realized that I was barefoot, so he told me to go inside and put shoes on. I ran inside, my mom following, and I turned around to make sure my mom was inside. She was trying to close the door, but M had jammed it with his foot. M's fist went into my mom's right cheek, and she fell backwards and screamed. I turned and ran, screaming. Our tenants (they were both Air Force veterans, thank god for them) ran upstairs to see what happened.

They stepped between M and my mom and called 911. I dashed up to my room, locked and blockaded the door, and hid in my closet. I could hear M yelling. "Angela! Come on, put your shoes on faster! Hurry up!"

Sirens sounded in the distance. "Faster, you little pig! Then he left. My mom came upstairs to tell me it was okay, and we shared a long hug. Her cheek was bright red, so we went downstairs to ice it. The police came, but they only talked to my mom. I tried to talk to them.

"Excuse me officer," I said, "I saw what happened. Would you like to take my statement?" The officer bent down to my eye-level and said, "No, little girl, it's okay. Your mommy is going to be just fine, her boo-boo is going to heal, it's okay." I walked away astonished. How could an officer talk to an 11 year old like that? I wasn't just an average 11 year old, either, I was very mature for my age.

My mom and I went to the hospital to get her jaw x-rayed. We were sitting in the waiting room, waiting for the x-rays to process, and who else walks in but M. He sat down next to me, looked at my mom, and said "Do I need to get an attorney?" He then proceeded to grab me, throw me over his shoulder, and attempt to walk out with me. I started crying and screaming for my mom, and my mom started screaming.

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People in the waiting room - family of patients, security guards, and even patients, surrounded him in a circle and told him to put me down. M said, "She's MY daughter, I can do what I want with her!" After a few minutes of this going on, a security guard said that she would arrest him if he didn't put me down. He then dropped me on the floor; I got up and ran right to my mom.

That night, the police lead my mom and I to a hotel in Delaware, where we stayed for two days. We filed for a PFA Order against him that night, and the police gave us one - it was temporary, but it was still an order.

After that, we stayed with friends and family, before finally going back to our house in June to pack up to move. That summer, we moved in with my grandparents. I was 12 now, I started at a new school, made new friends, and I finally felt like my life was on track. Then the court battles started.

Every time we went to court, it was the same thing over and over. I was not allowed in the courtroom, there were threats to throw my mom in jail, etceteras. Through these court proceedings, we got the PFA extended to March of 2013, which was only the really good thing that happened.

When I was 13, my mom came home from court with bad news. She handed me the order that was produced from that day's hearing. "‌must attend 48-hour unsupervised overnight visits with the father‌" That was all I read. I went into my room, locked the door, and had the worst anxiety attack of my life. I punched walls, I smashed my head into the floor, I tried stabbing myself with whatever I could find. I just wanted to die. I didn't want to see him ever again, but of course the court didn't care about me. They never listened to what I said. My mom managed to unlock the door, and she ran in and hugged me.

"You've already been on supervised visits with him‌ now there's just no one there. Be strong, okay? They're threatening to put me in jail if you don't go."

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"But mom! No! This is overnight! You don't know what he did to me!"

I pushed my mom out of the room and called the Crimes Victims' Centre.

I talked to a woman named H, she was very nice. She calmed me down. I told her what was going on, I told her everything that I told the guidance counsellor back in sixth grade‌ and then I told her one more thing. I had been hiding it because I knew that it was wrong; I knew that if M found out that I told anyone, he might kill me.

"That's not all he did to me, though." "It's not? What else did he do?"

"Well, I was at his house for the weekend a few years ago, right before I went into sixth grade. He came into my room in the middle of the night.

He thought I was sleeping..."

That's all I'll put here, It's getting hard to type. What I explained to H was how M had molested me in August of 2008. His behaviour the next morning had led me to believe that he had done it more than once, though. He came into my room, said "daddy came in to give you a kiss last night, do you remember?" I said "no," he said "good," and he walked out of my room. The strange thing is, though, is that he would say that every morning.

After I talked to H, she asked to speak to my mom. I walked out of my room, gave my cell phone to my mom, and then fell asleep. The anxiety attack had worn me out. Later that month, we went to the police station so the police could take my statement about the molestation. The officer took me into a room, turned on a camera and a microphone, and had two other people sitting in the room "just in case." She took my statement, and later that week I went to St. Christopher's hospital to get a physical exam.

The doctor said that there was definitely damage done to my body, and with that she concluded that what I said happened to me was true. Despite this, the police closed the case, saying that is was "unfounded." I had talked to many therapists after this, some even court appointed.

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The court appointed therapists (Dr. Ma, Dr. Sh, Dr. F, and Dr. Se) refused to believe that M had ever abused me; they said that my mom was putting it all in my head. Dr. Sh was appointed by the court to do a "veracity study" on me - basically to see whether I was lying. The 45 minute session started with 15 minutes of conversation about my school, and then ended with 30 minutes of me filling out papers about doing drugs and alcohol. I also noticed that Dr. Sh's office was in the same building as M's attorney's office.

I felt like I wasn't being heard. I was being pushed aside. The court didn't want to listen to me, even though it was my life that they were playing with. I wanted to talk to the judge, and I did once, but it was just a conversation about school. I wanted to tell him exactly what happened to me, exactly how I feel. So I did. I went online, and found the judge's direct phone number. He wasn't in, so I left a message.

"Judge B, I want you to know that I will not be going on these overnight, unsupervised visits. Not because I don't want to, but because I can't. I mentally can't." When it came time to actually go on the visits, I was scared for my mom. I didn't want her to be put in jail - so I went on the first few. After being threatened to have my neck snapped and being constantly yelled at, I was thrown into more frequent panic attacks, both during and not during the visits.

I needed a way out. I thought suicide might be the answer. Right before the next visit, I talked to the school guidance counsellor. When I told her about my suicidal thoughts, she called my mom. My mom took me to the crisis centre at the hospital, and they put me in a behavioural facility.

Sure, I had to get blood drawn, deal with terrible food, and miss a lot of school, but it was a lot better than being at M's house. Then I realized - I missed the visit. I missed it, and they couldn't put my mom in jail for it, because it was something out of her control. For the rest of the visits (there were two more) I "faked" suicidal ideation to get myself thrown into the hospital again.

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I say I "faked" it because I knew what I was doing. The suicidal feelings were still there, and they were still real, but I used them to get me out of the visits. Then the summer of 2011 came. There were still visits during the summer, but I figured that they couldn't throw my mom in jail for something that I choose to do. So I would get driven to his house, and I would refuse to get out of the car. I wouldn't get out no matter what. After a few times of this happening, he wouldn't even come out and try to persuade me anymore.

During the school year, the judge had made the visits short, but they got progressively longer. They started at thirty minutes, went to an hour, then eight hours, and then overnight. During the first overnight visit of that sequence, I was arrested. M had been saying nasty and untrue things about my family. I started to have a panic attack. I blocked out everything he was saying and tried to calm myself down. I don't know what made me do it, but I stood right in front of him, looked at him in the eyes, and said: "Would you like to die?" I then proceeded to kick him in his ribcage; he tackled me to the ground and held me down until his wife could call the police. When the police arrived, M and his wife both yelled, simultaneously, "She has her mother's gun in her backpack!" I told the officers that they could search my bag if they felt necessary. The police searched my bag, found no weapons, and then talked to me. I said: "Right now, I'm under the influence of my anxiety. I have no control over myself, so I might kill him if you let me stay here."

They took me into custody right away, called my mom, and my mom and aunt came to pick me up at the police station. Charges were pressed, and I was convicted of assault. The court gave me very little probation obligations, only twenty-five hours of community service to complete. We had another court hearing on December 20th, 2011. My mom came home from the hearing and said two things. For one, the judge decided to continue the hearing until a later date in 2012. Second, the judge had appointed me a Guardian Ad Litem.

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During the continued hearing in April 2012, my Guardian Ad Litem persuaded the judge to talk to me. While in the judge's chambers, we talked about everything that has been going on. He asked me if I had anything else to say. I told him: "I am a fourteen year old girl. I am very mature for my age, I am not easily influenced by others, and I am capable of making up my own mind."

With that, he declared the meeting over. The verdict was reached. "No visits for three months - after July, they will be supervised and at a neutral location. They will start at thirty minutes and gradually get longer," Then the judge turned to me.

"Angela, I cannot order you to talk to him, look at him, or be cordial. I can only order you to go," The judged faced the rest of the courtroom again. "We will reconvene in September." Just like that, the court hearing ended. It was the greatest day of my life so far. For once, I could finally be a normal teenager (aside from my probation charges, but I'm not worried about them).

Since then, I've been living a normal, happy life; I haven't had an anxiety attack since before the court hearing. I'm only a little worried about going on the visits in August - they're supervised, and at a neutral location, so it takes some of the worries away. I don't feel completely trapped anymore I'm fifteen now, things seem to be going mostly my way, and I haven't had to worry too much since the hearing. Hopefully, an even better fate will be waiting for me in that courtroom in September. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ We have with held Angela’s picture until after her September hearing when we shall continue this story.

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Missing Childr

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$25,000 Reward Still Offered for Information Regarding Jhessye Shockley’s Disappearance and/or Whereabouts Continues To Be URGENTLY Sought.

IF YOU KNOW, SEE or HEAR OF ANY INFORMATION THAT CAN HELP POLICE FIND JHESSYE SHOCKLEY or LEAD TO THE APPREHENSION OF THE INDIVIDUAL or INDIVIDUALS RESPONSIBLE FOR HER DISAPPEARANCE, PLEASE COME FORWARD. Tips May Be Confidentially Placed By Contacting: 1+623 930-3000 1+480 Witness (948-6377)

By Calling: 911 Information May Also Be Submitted On This Site Name: Jhessye Jash’ua Shockley Date Of Birth: April 1, 2006 Age: 6 Ethnicity: African-American Height: 3’5″(104cm) Weight: 55 lbs(25kg) Eyes: Brown Hair: Black

Case Number: 1181452 129

Or Please call 916.322.5062 130

Kristi Deann Merrill, 25, left the Carmichael home of her mother Bryn Barton on March 23 and said she would be back by 11 p.m.

Barton, is still waiting for her return, even as last seen March 23, 2012 she vanished into the dark. Please call with information or tips if you have seen her or know something about her disappearance: 877-885-2624 or 916.322.5062.

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This is Brittney Wood, my 19 yr old step-daughter who, on May 30, 2012 left her mother's home on foot around 7:30 pm and hasn't been seen since. Brittney, please come home!

IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION, PLEASE CALL: 251-208-7211 Mobile PD; 251-208-7000 CrimeStoppers; or 855-733-5567 KlassKids FindBrittneyWood@gmail.com @FndBrittneyWood on Twitter

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Gone but not forgotten the Nicole Ayers story

By Sherna Benjamin

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What justice can be given to a mother whose aspiring, beautiful, talented, and athletic daughter has been violently taken from her without notice and through horrific violence?

No more can this mother see the smiling face of her daughter, no more can they have does spiritual talks of faith, hope, and love, no more can she find delight in their conversations, enjoy their shopping sprees, and feel her soul trill with love by those moments of embrace which came so often, this mother will never see her daughters face light up with joy and love after she received a proposal for marriage.

What justice can be given to a father who will never be able to give that fatherly advice, a father who will never walk his daughter down the Aisle, a father who will never embrace those grandchildren she would have borne, a father who will never have his daughter to be by his side in his old age?

What justice can be given to a family whose loved one has been snapped from them by a calculated act of murder, a loved one who will never walk in her graduation, and play her favourite sport?

A loved one whose company they will never enjoy again, a loved one who will never again be a confidant and friend, who will be around the table on those family holidays, and whose birthday shall never again be celebrated.

Can justice truly be given to those loved ones who will never again hear her voice, see her determination, experience her compassion and care, and whose dreams will never be realized?

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I speak here of Nicole Ayers, June 5th 2012 was a normal day for many but for a family in New Jersey it was an unexpected, shocking blow to the heart, on this day in history two names will never be forgotten for they shall forever be penned in the history books of New Jersey, along with the brutal crime which history will never allow us to forget.

This day will stand out as a memory of how depraved the human mind can become with no value or sacredness for human life and no mercy or compassion to the mournful pleas of the innocent victim.

This day will also stand as a memory to the people of New Jersey constantly reminding them and us how innocence can be taken out of the world in the blink of an eye and how we ought not to take one moment of life, loved ones, and those less fortunate for granted.

Nicole Ayers was a promising 22 year old Softball star she dominated the game fully, she attended Deptford high and held a school record of 920 strikeouts she later attended Fordham University on an athletic scholarship, one of her dreams was to play for Rutgers-Camden she transferred to Rutgers University-Camden where she signed up for her major to be sociology.

However her dream was never realized because her young and precious life was brutally taken from her by Stephen Headley a 30 year old registered sex offender who was finishing five years of probation for endangering the welfare of a child when he brutally without conscience stabbed Nicole multiple times in the head, neck, and back in September of 2010 and left her body in the woods of south Jersey to rot.

On June 5th Stephen Headley admitted to stabbing Nicole Ayers age 22 multiple times, during a hearing in the Superior court in Mount Holly, the 30 year old Headley was asked the following question by his defence attorney Cedric Edward, “your intention was to cause her bodily injury to lead to her death?” Headley responded “Yes” without emotion or showing remorse.

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The admission occurred during a plea hearing in which Headley entered a guilty plea to a charge of first degree murder. The problem! Stephen Headley may only receive 30 years behind bars; the family of Nicole Ayers would like the Judge to give a sentence of life in prison as the taking of one life is one too much. No amount of prison time can take away the pain and hurt which Nicole’s family is experiencing the missing of her smile, her scent, her unfailing love, care and devotion to family and friends.

But knowing that her murderer would be behind bars for the rest of his life will bring some solace, closure, and comfort knowing that he will never again have the opportunity to hurt another human being will also bring peace to the residence of New Jersey. Nicole has been gone now for one year and nine months the length of her death should not lessen the cruelty of the crime committed against her nor should it lesson the demand for justice fitting the crime, a human life is not a vapour in the wind it is sacred it is to be respected.

What truly happened on that fateful night when Nicole was killed may never be known as Stephen Headley has taken a plea bargain but what we do know is that a daughter, sister, friend, confidant, gifted athlete, and an aspiring leader was brutally murdered. All the family is asking for on August 3rd when Headley is to be sentenced is life for life, Nicole’s life was brutally taken on that fateful night, Headley should not be able to enjoy life outside of prison his life should be life behind bars which is only fair.

Justice has failed its many victims way too many times the daily hope of the Ayers family is that justice can begin to mend the broken bridge and once again stand as the saviour, hope, and deliverer of the victims it swore so many years ago to protect, when the founding fathers landed on the shores of America.

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To the Ayers family my heartfelt sympathy goes out to you but now you are given the solemn responsibility to forgive, heal, and fulfil the dreams of your wonderful and precious daughter, fulfil her dream by living, bringing hope to other young girls like Nicole who have a desire and passion to accomplish their purpose and become great, fulfil her dream by helping the less fortunate, fulfil her dream by helping victims and survivors the day she died she gave you this solemn responsibility and duty.

As time progress we tend to forget and let the memories fade and soon the most barbaric crimes become just a faint memory and somehow over time these crimes tend not to be so distasteful in the mouth, ears, heart, and conscience of the public I now leave you with one of my favourite quotes and may it find a place within your heart that you too will never forget the depravity of mankind.

"All the rivers run to the sea, days come and go, generations vanish, others are born, remembrance ceremonies follow one another -- and hatred is still alive, and some of us, the remnant of the remnant, wonder with the poet Paul Celan: who will bear witness for the witness, who will remember what some of us tried to relate about a time of fear and darkness when so many, too many victims felt abandoned, forgotten, unworthy of compassion and solidarity? Who will answer questions whose answers the dead took with them? Who will feel qualified enough and strong enough, faithful enough to confront their fiery legacy? What was and remains clear to some of us, here and elsewhere, is the knowledge that if we forget them, we too shall be forgotten.

But is remembrance enough? What does one do with the memory of agony and suffering? Memory has its own language, its own texture, its own secret melody, its own archeology and its own limitations: it too can be wounded, stolen and shamed; but it is up to us to rescue it and save it from becoming cheap, banal, and sterile.

To remember means to lend an ethical dimension to all endeavors and aspirations".

ELIE WIESEL

Please Visit http://www.justicefornicole.org/ 139

to sign the petition

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You Will See Them Someday Š Stephan Banks

when you lose someone it can be hard to take the pain that you feel when your heart has to break the memories you keep are all in your mind as you search your soul for more to find the way their skin felt the smell of their hair as you keep thinking over and shedding a tear the years may pass, memories fade to grey but your getting no younger you'll see them someday unconditional love is never forgotten look deep in your heart it is there at the bottom alone in the dark sometimes in fear voices from loved ones your hoping to hear more years pass, they soon fly by but your always looked upon from those in the sky surrounded by clouds and pure white doves they listen and watch sending you love just remember one thing as you sit and you pray they will be there to greet you, you will see them someday.

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How I survived

By Rodney Calmes My mother and dad got divorced when I was 4 years old. Prior to then, my dad favoured my brother and left me out; he took me on a job site and had me say that I was a girl to get others to make fun of me. I developed slower than most kids when I was young, and I had an uncle say "if I had a kid like that, I would kill him", and my dad laughed at that comment.

My mother stuck up for me and said "someday, that kid will grow up and will become a real man, and you will eat those words." I did not understand what was happening at the time, but I was hurt later on when I did understand. When my mother divorced my dad, he immediately sent me and my younger brother who was 2 at the time to his parent’s house. I lived there from when I was 4 until I was 5.

My grandparents who used to strip me of all my clothing and spank me with a 3 foot stick until I could not feel the stick hitting my butt anymore.

They did that in front of others who watched me get my butt beat and damaged. I got spanked like that for every little thing. I got at least one round spankings a day - which consisted of about 100 swats each from them if not more, sometimes up to 3 rounds like that in a day‘s time. I often got spanked until I had ulcers and my butt was black. I found that to be degrading and felt violated by that.

By the time I left my grandparents house to live with my mother, my nerves were permanently damaged, and I had hardly any feeling left in my butt. The emotional pain was so deep that I just wanted to bury that since I was 5 and never wanted to talk about it, but pretended it never happened. My mother tried to talk to me about it periodically and I would cry and could not get one word out. When I was about 6 years old, my mother said that I was going to my grandparents house, so I hid in the 142

basement, and she tried to comfort me and encourage me that I was not going to my dad's parents, but her parents, and that nothing was going to happen to me. I had a good loving family when I went to live with my mother, and my step dad treated me and loved me like I was his own.

When I was 19, I saw another kid have to pull his pants down to get a spanking, and I went into an emotional shock, I was shaking so bad, I could not get the keys in my car, so my friend took my keys and had me talk about it, I could not get one word out clearly, I was muted for a while. He had me stay overnight at his house until I could talk about it clearly and well composed. I t took till the next evening for me to do that. The emotional pain was then still very deep, and I tried to make myself feel better by trying to convince myself that I deserved it, thinking that I could make myself feel better about that. That lead me to believe that others should be treated like that. I realized that I was not going to like the person I become if I continued that. I also felt that if too many people discovered that I was abused, that they were going to think there was something wrong with me. I thought that I was no good for going through that. I felt like I was not worth anything. I was also picked on often in school from grade school to junior high school, and I went through life thinking there was something wrong with me.

I was not like the other kids, I was not good at the same things they were, but I was different. I still had the scars my grandparents left and I was so ashamed of it that I was looking for ways to get rid of those scars without someone else discovering them. Those scars were barely noticeable at that time and I would have to point them out for someone to notice them.

Then I got drunk one day when I was 22 years old and sat on a heater that had grates on it, and thought “good, now I can say an accident happened�, just so no one would find out what those scars really looked like.

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I got caned, however I did not solve anything by doing that. I became more self conscious of the scars, and I got nervous about changing in public locker rooms. I just got over that now. Others had encouraged me that it is understandable that I did what I did. They told me that I have nothing to be ashamed of; it is a part of me. I accepted Jesus Christ in my life and realized how much I was forgiven when I was 24 and when I was 27, I gave all this to God and asked him to help me to forgive all who wronged me, including my Grandparents, and those who picked on me in school and God helped me forgive them. Jesus went through more suffering to forgive me of all my sins than I ever went through, and realizing that, it helped me to forgive all who wronged me. The healing started when I forgave all who wronged me, and it felt like a huge burden was lifted off when I forgave all who wronged me.

God lead me to Romans 8:28 saying that God will work all things for the good of those who love Him. I had to have faith that God would do that for me. Now doors are opening for me to share this with others and help them heal. God has shown me that you can only combat abuse with kindness and love. Forgiveness is the only key for me to heal from my past. I have also learned that I am not any less of a person because of the mean things done to me, and there was nothing wrong with me, but there is something wrong with the abusers.

I also realized that I do not have to answer to God for what people did to me, but they will. I will only have to answer for the wrong things I have done. I realized that God loves me and considers me precious to Him. God loves me even if others do not. I have nothing to be ashamed of because of what happened to me. The apostles and prophets were also mistreated by others, only because they did not deserve them. I also realized that those who mistreated me did not deserve me. I also learned that God created every one of us different, and no 2 people are the same..

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We all have things we need to learn and we all have things we are good at. Most important of all, showing love and kindness to those who hurt will greatly help you heal as well as the other person - that is how we combat abuse. I am now doing just that to help others who have been abused. Sharing our stories, how we came to forgive and what we have learned helps all heal from their abuse.

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Moments Grace and 146

Of Reflection 147

The Father’s Love Sonia A. Adams

A Prayer to the Father Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

I am hurting and need you to rescue me.

Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

My hopes and dreams have been destroyed.

Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

This internal pain is unbearable and many nights I cry myself to sleep.

Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

Why do evil people exist in this world?

Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

Sometimes I go to sleep and pray that I want wake up.

Don’t you see me heavenly Father?

I need your help, your peace, and your healing.

When you are in the depths of despair, and have been hurt greatly that tears flood your eyes and uncertainty fills your heart, you wonder if anyone cares. Life is full of ups, downs, injustice, and evil people who do bad things to good people.

Everyone desires love. We desire to feel secure and know that comfort and peace will fill up our soul. When darkness is all around us, we yearn for a light that can change our life and give us hope. Our heavenly Father is that light. He is the One that will give you hope and His love can help restore your broken heart and mend your deepest pains.

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An answer from the Father Yes, I see your hurt and your pain.

I wrap My loving arms around you now.

Come to me and earnestly talk to Me And you will feel My presence in your midst!

Don’t give up- I love you so and I desire to heal your heart.

If you trust Me and My son Jesus, I will make a way of escape and give you freedom and peace!

Love, Your Heavenly Father Sonia is co-pastor of KT Christian Assembly, and founder of Blossoming Vines Ministries. An author of Searching to Fill the Void and Only A Little Distance To Success (Ephrathah) . She is a 1997 honor graduate of Oral Roberts University. Sonia is married to Shawn Adams and she has two sons. www.ktassembly.com or www. blossomingvines.com

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Lord I Run to You

By Valeria Long

Then the LORD said to Moses, "Go to Pharaoh and say to him, “This is what the LORD says: Let my people go, so that they may worship me (Exodus 8:1).

The cries of desperate people are still being heard today, by the Lord Jesus Christ, all over the earth and the Lord’s answer is still the same: “Let my people go so that they may worship me”.

You may be, today, in a very hard and dark place. Your circumstances may seem insurmountable. Your trials and heartache may seem like they have no end and this very day you may be contemplating your own end but hear the Word of the Lord, “And the LORD said, I have surely seen the affliction of my people which are in Egypt, and have heard their cry by reason of their taskmasters; for I know their sorrows and I am come down to deliver them out of the hand” of (name your oppressor) Exodus 3:7-8 Can you see past your pain and hear what the Creator of the universe says to you today: I have SURELY SEEN YOUR AFFLICTION. I HAVE HEARD YOUR CRY, I KNOW YOUR SORROWS and I am coming to deliver YOU!! YES YOU!!

The Lord is actively working in your situation because he wants YOU FREE. You cannot worship in bondage. Therefore, know that your situation has an ending and the Lord who created the universe is creating a new promise of freedom and hope for your future.

Valeria Long is the Worship/Vocal Director, at Christ Church, Columbia Station, Ohio. In addition, she is Co-Owner of Tri-Long Productions Medina, Ohio. Valeria is also married with a one son

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JESUS Loves You Personally

By Ed Eberly

Jesus not only loves the world but He Loves you personally.

If you would have been the only person on this earth Jesus would have still went to the Cross for you. His Love is unconditional and no matter what you've done, what has happened in your life, where you came from, how often you've failed in life, been abused, or rejected, Jesus Loves You. Jesus not only loves you and is with you, but God the Father sent Him to set you free from sin, sickness, fear, torment, poverty, and all lack and need in your life (Luke 4:18,19).

He wants to heal your pain, your mental torment, and set you free to start a new life in Him. Jesus came to give us an abundant life that we have peace, provision, joy, health, and a purpose for our lives.

People will hurt you; cast you out, and reject you, but Jesus said if we come to Him, He would never cast us out. The evil in this world are the works of the devil through people, but God sent Jesus Christ to destroy those works and set you free with a new life in Jesus Christ. God told us that He is not willing that any should perish, but all come to Him through His Son Jesus Christ.

Ed was born and raised in Chambersburg Pa. My wife and family moved to the Carolina's in 1986. We currently live in Rock Hill SC. My wife of 45 years as of July 8th, and I have 3 children, 9 grandchildren, and 5 great grandchildren and 1 due in December. Ed founded and Pastor several churches, and until recently he assisted as an associate to another pastor to help build his church. He is currently an Evangelist, author, and writer 151

Broken What is the cry of submission? It is the cry of pain that is release when everything you have you would give up if God would help, it is when you are finally broken and willing to surrender because you realize it is not within your power to fix, solve etc…, it is the time when only God can heal and take away the pain. It is the cry after your husband has cheated and you have given him your all and it seems like your soul is broken, it is the first time the doctor says, who hit you and you lie and say “I fell”, it is the time you wear a sweater in the summer because the bruise will show, it is the cry when you discover your child is on drug, or little Johnny is in jail again and this time for murdering a man, the time the doctor walks in and tell you, it may be cancer, or you have lost all your financial ability to care for yourself, there are things in life that will shake your very soul, this is when your soul finally surrenders to God. This is the time our troubles are so bad the pain leads use him, or as Psalm 120:1 says “I took my troubles to the Lord; I cried out to him and he answered my prayer.” These are the prayers that we scream Jehovah, Jehovah Jireh "The Lord will provide" Jehovah -Elohim God's power and might, Jehovah-Rapha, The Lord our healer" . When you are broken the Lord is the only one that can put the pieces back together, and sometimes for many of us this is the only time we connect or have given God the steering wheel in our lives.

You are beautiful and you are talented and gifted by God. Hold your head up and know that you are loved and appreciated. Don’t give the enemy any place to cause you to have low self-esteem or doubt. You are indeed fearfully and wonderfully made. Let your light shine today because it gives permission to others to do the same”. You are created in the image of God, who are you not to be beautiful, wonderful, intelligent and humble by his grace.

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Walk in the boldness of God’s divine love, because playing small does not allow one to fulfill his or her purpose on this planet and know in your heart and minds when you are in trouble, afraid, He will protect you. When you are discouraged, He will lift you because our God is an unending source of strength.

Dr. Mary Jo Odom-Dull is CEO and President of Vesicle Learning Inc. Christian and Secular Professor and Radio show host of Dr. Odom-Dull tower of grace and compassion radio show. An author of Mother’s Love, First Christian Diversity Newsletters, and Heaven Is Not Segregated: The First Christian Diversity workbook. She is an honors graduate and has a BSBA in Business Management and BSBA in Human Resource Management, Master in Education (MAED) and Four Graduate Certifications in Leadership, Human Resource Management, Diversity Studies and Counseling and PhD in Training and Performance Improvement with a specialization in Diversity and Globalization also she holds certification in Six Sigma "Yellow, Green, and Lean/DFSS Belt.

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I am

being

abuse d

what sh

ould

I do?

I tried to kill myself last night! y abusing ll a u x se is e h d n a o months ago tw e m d e p ra r e th My Fa m afraid! me I need help, I a

g through in o g I m a y h w he loves me if , d o G in h it fa I have lost my this?

I have just cheated on my husband?

My daughter has gotten very rebellious I need help?

My boyfriend slapped me last night I believe it was my fault?

t and n a n g e r p nd I am 16 a

not o d s t n e r my pa

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know!

Dear S.B, Can u give me an advice I am an overseas Filipino worker I work as a house helper for 7mnths already in a foreign country and I notice that my employer and the way they treat us as there maid or helper is not they are telling us bad words always like STUPID! IDIOT! NO GOOD AT WORK we are working so hard and do our best to make our work good they tells things like NO BRAIN, SHUT UP! You are an ANIMAL! it hurts my feelings but I try to ignore it, I just go in the corner and my tears fall, I triple my patience to them because I do not want to go in a jail here.

I accept all the words they are telling to me because I know my self better than them I always pray that God always protect me all the time I work here, what else can I do?

ML ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dear ML, I first must say that I am sadden by your present situation no one should be experiencing what you and your fellow workers are going through, what your employers are handing out to you is abuse, plain and simple, they are abusing you all and taking advantage of you all being foreigners and subjected to them. It is also sad that you are in a foreign country what you may try to do is talk to your employers and inform them about how you feel and the treatment which you are receiving from them, I understand that you have also said that you do not want to go to jail in the country where you are presently based and this says to me that there is many more advantages which these employers are handing out to you, I know many persons go to work overseas for a better standard of life not expecting the treatment which they are presently receiving, If you can get to a UN office you can speak to someone of your experiences and they should help you even if it is with getting another job. In the mean time continue to be strong and we shall continue to communicate for you do need encouragement and someone to communicate with your faith in God is also great as he sends Angels each156day to relieve the oppressed. ~S.B

Send your questions to voicesunited@oabivoices.org Dear S.B, I am 17 years of age and I have a close friend whom I have known for years this friend tells me what to do and how to think I feel uncomfortable but I love my friend and cherish our friendship and I do not want to end the friendship but I need her controlling to stop, I have tried to speak to her about it on many occasions but she does not listen to me and I cannot see myself without her friendship, please tell me what can I do to stop her from being controlling but to keep our friendship.

Confused. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Dear Confused, By your own admission you acknowledge that you feel uncomfortable with the relationship the problem which you have is defining boundaries and sticking to them it is also clear that your friend needs help and counseling allowing her to continue controlling because of fear is not helping her but destroying her as with each level of controlling your friend will begin to think that her behavior and is right and should be accepted not only by you but also by everyone around her.

You need to make a serious decision would you prefer to have your entire life controlled and dominated by another human being or would you like to be free to make your own choices and decisions.

This relationship also shows that you also have some personal issues which you need to deal with you need to work on your confidence as you believe some how deep within that you need to have someone to direct you, control you, and make decisions for you.

If you are happy with this relationship then do not complain or seek help if you are not then you need to do something about it and if your friend truly cares for you and loves you she will accept, respect, and encourage your decision. ~S.B 157

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Things are out of Control Lela Ann Albert In 1996, on Sunday evening in February, all ‘hell’ broke loose! I called the police after Dan hit into the wall of our daughter’s bedroom, then threatened to do me physical harm. From this time on, it was one incident after another, Dan’s abusive behaviours increased including abusing our children. There were many police and court interventions. Dan refused to change. So I made a life changing decision. This decision would prove to be the best decision I ever made for me and my children. (The abusive behaviours with Dan had been ongoing since the time I married him in 1882). This incident started the actual process of me leaving him after 16 years of marriage.

By the middle of January of 1998, the husband Dan Albert, Jr., was served the divorce papers, life was about to change again, things only got worse. The divorce was based on ‘extreme cruelty’. Acts of domestic violence. Things got worse at this point. The following are acts of violence/ criminal behaviour; January/February/6 week period. The husband Dan changed the locks on our house, could no longer access my house, he stalked me, driving back and forth at my parents home where I lived with the children, followed me to work on day, sending me things through the mails and harassing me with numerous phones calls. I ended up making police reports and filed charges against him.

Please note: I file in civil court for the right to access my own home, granted, received the new key to my house, April 1998. Mean while, during this time, I had been hired to work at FSA by the end of January. So

by April, I was totally off of welfare. In March ended up a court hearing for visitations, the husband Dan had supervised visitations due to his abuse and mental illness, so he started seeing our children by the end of March of 1998. This time period was very stressful for both me and for my children.

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Dan was not consistent in using his visitations rights, and that would continue to be this way until 2003. Please note: February of 2003, of his own will, the now ex husband Dan stopped using his visitation rights. The children both confronted their father, and today have nothing to do with him. Things were still crazy with me and working on visitation issues and healing, and dealing with a still abusive husband. (Mentally, and verbally still being abused). Denied restraining order due to down grading the charges from stalking to harassment on my part. REGRET. Should have kept the stalking charges.

By July, the truth finally surfaced that the husband Dan was having an affair with his one female friend from church. That was the final betrayal.

What I had always feared the most had come true. I had always known deep down in my heart, he was capable of doing this, from this time of 1998 till 2000, I was in family counselling and private counselling for abuse and divorce issues. During this time, the Lord used this counselling time to make me accountably for things I did in the marriage and then I would work on each area, one at a time, getting myself back in order in my parenting skills, and some personal areas.

In August of 1998, the divorce was final. It was just me and my lawyer.

That day was the most stressful yet peaceful day in my life. I knew that I was doing what right; God has released me from the marriage due to the abuse and the adultery from the husband Dan's behaviours/choices. It was like being in a movie, but the day was very much real. Everything was settled, it was finally over, and the legal end of the relationship was finished but not the emotional side of it. Friends took me out for lunch after the court procedures. I took the children to see their father later that evening. The tension and stress was very high. But through the power of God, I made it! “I can do all things through Jesus Christ”, words I spoke into my spirit that day. I felt much relief that this marriage was over.

But dealing with the now ‘ex’ husband was going to continue for years to come.

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This was only the beginning of many more family issues and family court appearance. After the Divorce there was numerous incidents of all kinds of harassments on the part of the ex husband Dan. He attempted to control me, interfering with court orders, verbal attacks upon other family members, and using our children to take revenge upon me. Besides the family court issues, some issues were criminal issues that ended up in municipal court, where God used those hearings to teach me spiritual lessons. Police interventions for visitations, removal of items for my house, and for postal/letters issues/phone calls.

Due to a crime against my son, the ex husband Dan, did his best to harass me with that. Many incidents had to be recorded with local law enforcement. In the final divorce settlement, court order sale of house had to enforce this court order, house up for sale through real estate agency December of 1998. House under contact, settlement February of 1999. At settlement, ex husband Dan had been on and off medication for Bi polar, actually fell asleep at the settlement meeting, head hit table and snoring during the actual meeting in front of all those involved. I actually made excuses for his behaviour so that the settlement would be complete that day.

In fall of 1999, after attempting to work things out with him in parenting together, Dan decided he could no longer parent with me due to a current girlfriend, and Dan harassed me with phone calls/messages, which ended with me filing charges against him, a plea bargain, violated that, totally of 9 months of no contact. But this incident was the final wake up call for me to completely remove myself from him emotionally and to end the abuse. I never looked back after that, I move forward in keeping strong boundaries with him. I refused to be abused anymore at this point.

Family court appearances would be a way of life. In court, God would use these experiences for me to grow up and mature as a Christian woman. The first court hearing would be in the fall of 1998 and continue till present. The early years (1998-2000) of court were very stressful. I would pray to God for His strength, peace, and will be done.

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Due to needing a large amount of healing, court would be hard for me, caught up into the bitterness, anger, resentments, etc., attacking the now ex husband Dan, not allowing God to be in totally control. The resentments, anger, and bitterness control me so much, that I would always be seeking some kind of revenge in court for the now ex husband. I was intimidated by the judge, and lack confidence, making it hard for me to express my needs to the judge. I spent too much time preparing for court, rather than preparing in prayer for God’s will to be done.

Then was other court hearing came about (2000-2004) I started having a bit more confidence and prepared more in prayer for God’s will to be done and allowing God to be the one in control not me. I started to see different results in the court hearings that were victories in Jesus and watching him use the judge and the circumstances to bring glory and honour to him. Committing the hearing unto the Lord, starting to praise and worship Him more while waiting for my court to be heard. By 2005 to present, I would seek out the Lord’s will more and still prepare for court, but knowing that the Lord was in control and watching him work things out for me.

Having His peace upon me and regardless of how the court hearings would turn out, I was going to still praise Him and know that he has my best interest at heart. Most of the court hearings, I went alone, just me and Jesus! The Lord was teaching me to trust and depend on Him, alone, to the point, where no one went along with me. Facing the ‘giants’ with the Lord.

A court hearing in February of 2005, brought me much harassment from the ex husband Dan due to that crime with my son, making this court hearing one of the most stressful one on record. The last court appearance was in October of 2008, a hearing where the ex husband Dan wanted my son, emancipated, to stop paying child support. I was prepared in the spirit. I did not have to say much that time, because the Judge stated it all to the ex husband and straightened him out with denying his request.

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My son was still attending high school full time. Everything I wanted to say to the ex husband about his court motion, the judge stated it to them by law he had no legal basis for his requests. I sat there watching God once again, work on my behalf. I praise Him for that! It was the shortest hearing even, like 5 minutes long.

Some of my biggest battles were fought right in front of me, while I sat there in front of the judge. Family court issues with parenting where very deep and intense for me, being an abused woman and dealing with my abuser. God using the judge, seeing judgment come down on the now ex husband Dan, and seeing great favour from the Lord and with men. That was because I had commitment my will and control to the Lord. Mostly God used these court hearing to grow me up spiritually, teaching me to confront the issues with the ex husband Dan, in a godly and legal matter without all the drama of the flesh.

The battles belong to the Lord; I would only do the foot work, in doing the filing, paperwork, and appearances, all for the sake of my children and what was best for them. God would do the rest, because He knows best! So for the past 13 years, I have been abuse free!

Ms. Lela Albert Lelaadvocate@yahoo.com

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Am I Worthy?

By Summer Hawk

As the rain falls I remember gentler times a time of innocence I was free to love and be loved nothing could touch me I was safe storms raging invade my thoughts making me question am I worthy? old scars surface leaving blood stained tears on old roads travelled shadows dance in my mind’s eye with every blow I beg to wonder am I worthy? so many lost chances broken dreams shatter like glass raping my soul of innocence old forgotten voices thunder through my heart I hide behind walls shaken to the core the question begging to be answered am I worthy? then you with your tender heart gently creep in gifting me hope another road to travel my thoughts spin do I dare to believe that I have found in you the chance to be worthy ~♥summer hawk♥~ 165

The Reading Corner Every month we shall highlight some recommended books for reading we firmly believe in education and development of the mind and soul, there are enough books out on the market which can make for interesting and reflective reading, reading does something to the mind when you read of individuals life experiences and how they overcame it encourages you to continue knowing that all is not lost. To the victims of abuse and their families we encourage you to go to go join good reads as there are a variety of books which you can dive into and enjoy. And also use in your book club, what we are also seeing is that many professors, counsellors, psychologist, and educators are using the memoirs written by victims of abuse in their classroom and with their patients. Reading is not a substitute for any medical professional but it helps the spirit heal along the way. http://www.goodreads.com/

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“Give me a man or woman who has read a thousand books and you give me an interesting companion. Give me a man or woman who has read perhaps three and you give me a dangerous enemy indeed.”

f o nt i o p r e a t e to d i r oa er w eas, s o v d t y i o n s , i a t ew riety f m i i : v y o a a l f v s s t by o i e n g t v u a n i r s di f i g m a e u e of R ead which ry, h d th y r r to s n o o i t a T ” H “ ge f his nce s. w of A a e i t van ins o perie inquinra revie ra d ex s (i e Tim e l r a nci a sha n , Fi ing

-A

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yl Gra

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Sex Trafficking: A Global Perspective

By Kimberly A. McCabe, Sabita Manian (Editor), Karin Bruckmuller (Contribution by), Brad Bullock (Contribution by), Michael A. Bush (Contribution by)

In Sex Trafficking: A Global Perspective, sex trafficking is discussed in terms of its multiple purposes and its victims. The essays provide information to build upon the limited knowledge based on the subject of sex trafficking and the legislative responses to human trafficking by the various highlighted countries. This collection is unique because it serves the needs of those studying human trafficking from a global perspective by targeting the issue within every geographic region; it provides a general profile of geographic regions in terms of demographic characteristics and political conditions that may support the growth of sex trafficking; and it is written on a basic information-supply level to provide readers with a foundation on human trafficking throughout the world.

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God in a Brothel: An Undercover Journey into Sex Trafficking and Rescue

by Daniel Walker

This is the true story of an undercover investigator's experiences infiltrating the multi-billion -dollar global sex industry.

It is a story of triumph for the children and young teens released from a life of slavery and the rescuer who freed many hundreds of victims leading to the prosecution of dozens of perpetrators. And it is a story of haunting despair for those left behind in corrupt systems of law enforcement.

It is the personal story of Daniel Walker, one man who followed a path of costly discipleship, agonizing failure and unlikely redemption.

And it is a challenge to God's people to join in the battle that all might be freed.

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Human Trafficking

By Kathryn Cullen-DuPont

"Despite the United Nations having officially abolished slavery and the slave trade more than 60 years ago, millions of human beings continue to be enslaved. Human trafficking - the official term for the modern-day slave trade - consists of buying and selling people with the intent of exploiting them through forced labour or sexual acts." Human Trafficking provides a thorough examination of this issue. It describes the suffering caused by human trafficking as well as the financial and cultural conditions that make modern slavery possible, both within and beyond national borders. The efforts of the United Nations, national governments, and nongovernmental organizations to combat human trafficking are thoroughly discussed, as are those to provide direct aid to the individual victims. Human Trafficking is an eye-opening account that examines how the trade is conducted in the United States, the Netherlands, Nigeria, India, and Belize. Each case study analyzes the patterns of trade, the types of exploitation, why countries have failed to halt the practice, and the unrelenting efforts to eradicate human trafficking.

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The Slave Next Door: Human Trafficking and Slavery in America Today

By Kevin Bales, Ron Soodalter

In this riveting book, authors and authorities on modern day slavery Kevin Bales and Ron Soodalter expose the disturbing phenomenon of human trafficking and slavery that exists now in the United States. In The Slave Next Doorwe find that slaves are all around us, hidden in plain sight: the dishwasher in the kitchen of the neighborhood restaurant, the kids on the corner selling cheap trinkets, the man sweeping the floor of the local department store.

In these pages we also meet some unexpected slaveholders, such as a 27-year old middle-class Texas housewife who is currently serving a life sentence for offences including slavery. Weaving together a wealth of voices--from slaves, slaveholders, and traffickers as well as from experts, counsellors, law enforcement officers, rescue and support groups, and others--this book is also a call to action, telling what we, as private citizens, can do to finally bring an end to this horrific crime.

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Slave Hunter: One Man's Global Quest to Free Victims of Human Trafficking

by Aaron Cohen, Christine Buckley From living the rock star life to wading through the world's war zones, refugee camps, and brothels, Aaron Cohen left behind his closest friends, his dying father, and his partnership with a legendary musician to take on treacherous rescue missions in search of modern-day slaves Years of drug addiction and late-night partying led Aaron Cohen, one-time best friend and business partner to Jane's Addiction front man Perry Farrell, on a path of spiritual discovery that has both transformed and endangered his life — a path that has drawn him into the shantytowns of Cambodia and the hidden brothels of Latin America, across the sweltering savannahs of Sudan, up to the Dalai Lama's Himalayan retreat, and through the unforgiving jungles of Burma and the deserts of Iraq.

At a time when more people than ever before are enslaved somewhere on the planet, Aaron Cohen is a slave hunter — working to find and free human beings from various forms of bondage.

The flesh trade is the world's fastest-growing and most deadly illegal enterprise — even more profitable and easier to hide than guns, drugs, and precious gems. Free from diplomatic restrictions and political agendas, Cohen is a unique asset to government agencies, think tanks, and anti-slavery organizations. He navigates the oppressive territory of pimps and drug lords, cloaked in the all-too-familiar world of substance abuse, oversized egos, and changing rules. Working alone and posing as a sex tourist, he slips into brothels, urged by madams to select from a line-up of women and girls as young as six. Sometimes he can save them from their captors, but more often than not, he must leave them behind, taking only the evidence he hopes will eventually lead to their rescue.

Struggling to make ends meet on his own negligible salary, Cohen faces temptations few could resist and witnesses atrocities his friends and family cannot understand. And though many assignments over the years carry him away from his ailing father, his commitment to protect, assist, and empower human trafficking victims — and to disrupt the patterns that lead to all forms of enslavement — is unyielding. In a remarkable exposé of a sinister trade most of us will never experience first -hand, rocker-turned-antislavery activist Aaron Cohen reveals the fast-paced, timely, inspiring, and unforgettable story of a real life Slave Hunter.

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Child Sex Trafficking in the United States

By Jeff V. Higgins, Christopher M. Brady

The editors of this book focus on domestic sex trafficking, including the prostitution of children.

The exact number of child victims of sex trafficking in the United States is unknown because comprehensive research and scientific data are lacking.

Sex trafficking of children appears to be fuelled by a variety of environmental and situational variables ranging from poverty or the use of prostitution by runaway and "thrown-away" children to provide for their subsistence needs to the recruitment of children by organized crime units for prostitution.

Experts agree that any efforts to reduce the prevalence of child sex trafficking, as well as other forms of trafficking, should address not only the supply, but also the demand. In this book, demand reduction strategies are considered, such as increasing public awareness and prevention, as well as bolstering investigations and prosecutions of those who buy illegal commercial sex.

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ABUSE HIDDEN BEHIND THE BADGE

By Rosaura Torres BIOGRAPHY OF ROSAURA TORRES Author Rosaura Torres is a Philadelphia, PA resident, who has won first place in the 2011 International Latino Book Awards, in the Women's Issues category. Ms. Torres released her new controversial and provocative book, " ABUSE HIDDEN BEHIND THE BADGE" in July 2010. The 2011 International Latino Book Awards Celebration was Wednesday, May 25, at el Museo Del Barrio, New York City, during Book Expo America. Ms Torres has been a vocal activist against domestic violence involving woman, children and men for the past 3 years. Ms. Torres' involvement in this mission came out of her own personal experience as a survivor of domestic violence involving police officers. Rosaura Torres was born on February 26, 1960 in Milwaukee, Wisconsin to parents of Puerto Rican descent.

Ms. Torres now resides in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. Her mother's name was Carmen and her father Ismale Torres. They taught her never to give up, to continue forward regardless the challenge. They were hard working and loving parents. Ms. Torres is the mother of three children and grandmother to three grandchildren. Ms. Torres comes from a modest and humble background. During her childhood, Ms. Torres attended schools in Philadelphia; Camden, New Jersey and Fort Myers, Florida. Ms. Torres has a range of talent and experience from being a Receptionist, Administrative Assistant, Fitness Consultant, Sales Executive at Al Dia Newspaper to serving as Public Relations Coordinator for pharmaceuticals in Camden, New Jersey.

Due to two (2) retinal detachment surgeries stemming from her experiences with domestic violence, Ms. Torres is an avid activist speaking out against domestic violence and more specifically "The Code of Silence" within police departments.

She stands for the right of everyone regardless your gender. "You have the right to not get violated!" says Ms. Torres. Ms. Torres latest accomplishment has been eleven (11) years in the making. She has authored and published a provocative and controversial new autobiography titled "ABUSE HIDDEN BEHIND THE BADGE", which will be available on-line and at bookstores starting July 2010.

The book is Ms. Torres personal story of domestic violence during her relationships with two police officers, one in Philadelphia and the other a Pennsylvania State Trooper. For more information visit our website at www.torrespublishing.com 180

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UNITE Why should we UNITE? It is SIMPLE…...

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We need to UNITE to END VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN and CHILDREN. “There is one universal truth, applicable to all countries, cultures and communities: violence against women is never acceptable, never excusable, never tolerable.”

SECRETARY-GENERAL BAN KI-MOON ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ About UNiTE Launched in 2008, United Nations Secretary-General Ban Kmoon’s UNiTE to End Violence against Women campaign is a multiyear effort aimed at preventing and eliminating violence against women and girls in all parts of the world.

UNiTE calls on governments, civil society, women’s organizations, young people, the private sector, the media and the entire UN system to join forces in addressing the global pandemic of violence against women and girls.

By 2015, UNiTE aims to achieve the following five goals in all countries:    

Adopt and enforce national laws to address and punish all forms of vio lence against women and girls Adopt and implement multi-sectoral national action plans Strengthen data collection on the prevalence of violence against women and girls Increase public awareness and social mobilization Address sexual violence in conflict.

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UNiTE Goals States are failing to meet their responsibility to end violence against women and girls.

Violence against women must be prioritized at all levels. It has not yet received the priority required to enable significant change. Leadership and political will is critical.

The most effective way to fight violence against women is a clear demonstration of political commitment by States, backed by action and resources.

To address the problem, Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon has identified five goals which his UNiTE to End Violence against Women campaign aims to achieve in all countries by 2015.

Goal 1: Adopt and enforce national laws to address and punish all forms of violence against women and girls Goal 2: Adopt and implement multi-sectoral national action plans

Goal 3: Strengthen data collection on the prevalence of violence against women and girls

Goal 4: Increase public awareness and social mobilization

Goal 5: Address sexual violence in conflict

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UNiTE brings together a host of UN offices and agencies to end violence against women: United Nations Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of Women [UN Women] Inter-Agency Network on Women and Gender Equality [IANWGE] Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights [OHCHR] United Nations Action Against Sexual Violence [UN Action] United Nations Children's Fund [UNICEF] United Nations Development Programme [UNDP] United Nations Population Fund [UNFPA] United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees [UNHCR] World Health Organization [WHO] What We Do United Nations Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon’s UNiTE to End Violence against Women campaign calls for the prevention and elimination of violence against women and girls in all parts of the world.

UNiTE brings together a host of UN agencies and offices to galvanize action across the UN system to prevent violence against women. Through the campaign, the UN is also joining forces with individuals, civil society and Governments.

Some of the UN’s many efforts towards putting an end to violence against women in all its forms are highlighted below: Influencing laws and policies Mobilizing Partnering 185

What can you do?

You can Take Action Action For Governments and Local Authorities 

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Adopt national and local plans of action for ending violence against women, including allocating funds and resources for prevention and awarenessraising programmes and activities.

Review existing legislation and identify gaps and areas to be strength ened, working with civil society groups. Develop policies and regula tions to implement legislation at all levels, including by health, police and justice officials.

Ratify relevant international treaties to which your country is not al ready a party.

Improve data collection on violence against women and girls, includ ing through population-based surveys.

Inaugurate an annual award to recognize women and men working locally or nationally to end violence against women.

Create cross-sectoral coordinating committees to address the issue of violence against women, working with civil society groups.

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Action For Schools and Universities 

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Hold conferences, seminars and workshops to ensure that educators at all levels are trained in gender and women’s issues, including recognizing and addressing violence against women.

Organize panel discussions, symposia and debates for students on the issue of violence against women, inviting experts from local NGOs, the government, academia or the private sector to participate as guest speakers.

Include activities to raise awareness and promote prevention of violence against women in your curriculum.

Organize a public speaking contest on the issue, targeting male students in particular.

Run an essay-writing contest on the topic of violence against women.

Winning entries could be posted on your website or offered to a local newspaper for publication.

Organize an art/poster contest, asking students to conceptualize the issue.

Ask students to create a flash animation presentation or e-postcard to highlight the problem of violence against women, especially in a local context.

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Action For Civil Society 

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Work with government officials at the local and national levels to establish legislation to help end violence against women in your country or community. You can consult the violence against women database.

To find out about your country’s legal framework, policies and programmes on the issue, as well as data and statistics.

Initiate an SMS/text message campaign to create awareness about gender-based violence in your country or community.

Produce a compilation of real-life stories of women and men working to end violence against women, and send it to government officials, NGOs and media.

Organize seminars and speaking events that focus on issues such as national legislation on violence against women and the role of men in stopping violence against women in local communities.

Ask local artists to create a piece on violence against women and organize an exhibit to display the work. Screen a film which highlights the issue, and follow it with a panel discussion or question and answer session with the filmmakers.

Run a workshop for local journalists to sensitize them to issues of gender and reinforce the importance of the role of the media in ending violence against women.

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Action For Business 

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Hold mandatory gender awareness workshops for all employees in your company.

Implement a zero-tolerance policy towards gender discrimination and harassment in your workplace.

Ask staff to nominate a women’s representative for your employees.

Select a local NGO which is working to end violence against women as your company’s chosen charity for the year.

Go to the website and do get involved UNITE to end violence against women. http://endviolence.un.org/

#40 Woodford Street Newtown, POS

Phone: 622-7273/ 657-5355 fax: 622-1079

http://www.rapecrisistt.org/

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Human Trafficking Organizations Directory Listing.

If you know of any organizations please send us their information at support@oabivoices.org and we shall place them on this directory listing.

Doctors at War against trafficking worldwide P.O. Box 681364 Franklin, Tennessee 37068

http://www.doctorsatwar.org/ Doctors at War provides critical medical care to human trafficking victims -helping them recover from the ill health effects of long-term abuse and neglect

888-55-AT WAR (888-552-8927) Polaris Project P.O. Box 53315 Washington, D.C. 20009 Tel: 202-745-1001 Fax: 202-745-1119

http://www.polarisproject.org/ Polaris Project is a leading organization in the United States combating all forms of human trafficking and serving both U.S. citizens and foreign national victims, including men, women, and children.

United Nations Office on Drugs and http://www.unodc.org/unodc/ Crime index.html?ref=menutop Human Trafficing .Org http://www.humantrafficking.org/ Andrea M. Bertone, Ph.D. HumanTrafficking.org Director (Project of the Academy for Educational bertone.andrea@gmail.com Development) Washington, DC

Amnesty International USA 5 Penn Plaza New York, NY 10001 phone: (212) 807-8400 fax: (212) 627-1451

aimember@aiusa.org

The Michigan Rescue and Restore Coalition

http:// www.michiganrescueandrestore.com/ index.html

http://www.amnestyusa.org/our-work/ issues/women-s-rights/violence-againstwomen?id=1108428

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A21 Campaign

http://www.thea21campaign.org/

427E 17th Street # F223 PO Box 7820 Costa Mesa, CA 92627 Baulkham Hills BC NSW 2153 USA Australia Tel: +1 949 202 4681 Tel: +61 2 8985 6819 Fax: +1 949-612-0827

Breaking Out Corp

Email: Info@breakingoutcorp.org Main Number: (866) 224-2888 Fax Number: (866) 323-2649

http://www.breakingoutcorp.org/ index.html

Breaking Out Corporation P.O. Box 29404 Henrico VA 23242

Truckers Against Trafficking

http://www.truckersagainsttrafficking.com/

tat.truckers@gmail.com

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