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What now?

Camps and schools deal with aermath of Newtown shooting

by Emily Jacobs Staff Writer

I

t seems like just yesterday our country was reeling from the tragedy caused by James Eagan Holmes, the gunman who killed 12 people and injured more than 50 others in a screening of e Dark Knight Rises in Aurora, Colo.

Less than a week before, the Jewish community was holding its breath in fear as headlines across the nation read “Jewish Summer Campers Terrorized” when three adults and two juveniles drove through Camp Bonim in Northeastern, Pa., yelling anti-Semitic slurs and shooting campers with paint ball guns.

Now, we’re once again dealing with a tragedy. is one even more terrible than the last, with 20 children, all under the age of 8, and six adults massacred by Adam Lanza, a 20-year-old who also took his mother’s life before taking his own.

So how do we keep our children safe? How can we possibly go about our normal lives knowing that this could happen at any

minute at our childrens’ camps and day schools?

Jonah Geller, president and CEO of Capital Camps, recommends that organizations

Geller, along with other Jewish agency executive directors, met on Monday and heard from John Wassel, director of security for e Jewish Federation of Greater Washing-

weren’t sure how to react.”

Wassel also recommends making sure that the camera and access systems are all up to date and working properly.

When a tragedy occurs, “I think we all take stock of how we can improve on things. It really makes us carefully review what we already have in place.”

— Jonah Geller, president and CEO of Capital Camps take every opportunity to re-evaluate security measures and emergency action plans.

Geller, who described the Newtown massacre as a “shock wave through the entire community,” explained that at Capital Camps, “the safety of our campers and staff is paramount to everything we do. We have a number of security measures already in place and have continued to improve and check and make sure that we are acting as responsibly as possible.”

He added that when a tragedy occurs, “I think we all take stock of how we can improve on things. It really makes us carefully review what we already have in place.”

ton, to review important elements of security measures and get some professional advice on how to better protect their organizations.

“I stressed that the most important thing that we can do for security is to make sure everyone has an emergency plan that they have tested,” said Wassel, who has been doing security evaluations both nationally and internationally for the past 30 years. “As we see from the situation in Connecticut, even having an access system doesn’t preclude someone from getting into the building. ere needs to be a security plan in case someone gets into the building or onto the premises.

It appears that they had some training but

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“I reminded the executive directors that someone dangerous may be someone you know or someone that used to work for your organization that may still have access to the building. When a person leaves an organization, it’s extremely important to make sure their ID is taken out of the system, and to make sure that all cameras are recording and working properly.”

Many, if not all, of the area day schools have released statements to their families, offering support through school counselors See AFTERMATH, next page

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Camp&SchoolGuide AFTERMATH from previous page and promising increased security measures for their children. “Over the next few days and weeks, as with schools all over the country, we will review our security procedures and equipment,�

Gesher Jewish Day School in Northern Virginia said in a statement. “Much care and concern was devoted to the safety and security features of our facility when it was built six years ago. Since then, we have upgraded the initial settings with grants from Homeland Security and following consultation with Fairfax County Police Department and their emergency response team. We have trained our sta and faculty for lock-down and evacuation. As always, a guard is on duty whenever children are present, the doors are locked, and the security cameras are on. We strive to create as secure an environment as possible.â€?

Joshua Starr, superintendent of Montgomery County Public Schools, released a similar statement saying, “As an educator, I know the worry and concern that such a tragedy sends throughout every community.

We take the safety and security of our students and sta very seriously and work every day to make sure that our children are learn-

ing in a safe environment. We will continue to make safety a top priority.�

Howard County executive Ken Ulman announced yesterday his plans to create a joint task force on school security in response to the Newtown shootings. â€œî ˘ere are clearly broader, societal issues at play with tragedies such as the Newtown shootings,â€? Ulman said in a statement. “It’s not just a school problem, or a police problem. We have to put the pieces together and try to lower the odds that a tragedy like this happens again.â€?

With sadness and security on everyone’s mind, î ˘e Jewish Community Relations Council of Greater Washington and î ˘e Jewish Federation of Greater Washington hosted two brieďŹ ngs on security in local educational institutions this morning at the Jewish Community Center of Greater Washington and the Jewish Community Center of Northern Virginia. î ˘e brieďŹ ngs featured remarks from the local chiefs of police, training on security procedures in schools and synagogues, presentations from mental health professionals and moments of silence to memorialize the victims of Friday’s tragedy.

Wassel added that the Federation oers free security consultations for organizations. î ˘ose interested should email him at john.wassel@shalomdc.org.

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Having the talk Experts advise parents how to talk to their children about Newtown

by Simone Ellin Baltimore Jewish Times

H

ere we are again — dealing with a national tragedy so horriďŹ c, that it is almost impossible for us to imagine. And if we adults can’t fathom the killings at Sandy Hook Elementary School, how can we discuss them with our children?

Ideally, said Dr. Abram Sterne, a psychologist in private practice in Silver Spring, we wouldn’t discuss the events of last Friday at all. “Until the age of 8 or 9, children are fairly oblivious, and the line between fantasy and reality is blurry. î ˘ere tends to be a culture in America, and elsewhere, that young children should know about things they shouldn’t know about,â€? he said.

comfort, not rational responses. î ˘e emotional content is what needs to be addressed.â€?

Joan Grayson Cohen, Esq., LCSW-C, senior manager of access services for Jewish Community Services in Baltimore, agreed that parents should aim to make their children feel as safe as possible. But in the case of the Sandy Hook murders, she said, it is especially challenging. â€œî ˘is is a hard one in some ways. You really can’t 100 percent assure your child. We can never guarantee their security, but somehow before this happened there was some sense of security; we hadn’t been really concerned about sending our kids to school, especially the young ones. î ˘is felt dierent, because there were so many victims and they were so young,â€? said Cohen.

“Try to be brief and concise, and remember that even when they ask questions, what they want is comfort, not rational responses.� — Dr. Abram Sterne, a Silver Spring psychologist

î ˘at being said, Sterne acknowledged there is a possibility that young children will hear about the shootings. In that event, he said, “Parents should acknowledge the tremendous sadness and pain associated with the loss of lives. Children are aware of death and loss and know there are things that can hurt us. We can say, ‘Yes, terrible things can happen but they are rare.’ Our job is to reassure them that they are safe, that we will protect them, and we must do it authentically. Children can sense when we are inauthentic,â€? said Dr. Sterne. “Try to be brief and concise, and remember that even when they ask questions, what they want is

In Cohen’s view, it is unlikely that children — even young ones — are completely oblivious to the events in Connecticut. “Even if they don’t know what happened, children sense something’s going on,� she said.

Cohen advised that parents should observe their children to see if they are talking about the shooting. If so, try to determine how much they seem to know. “You need to be careful about staying with them, and not giving them more information than they need,� she said.

Cohen recommended that when possible, parents take some time to cope with their

own emotions about the tragedy before talking with their children about it. Choose the right time and setting to have the conversation and consider talking to each of your children individually, she suggested.

If children are not talking about the tragedy, Cohen advised parents to ask an open-ended question such as, “Have your heard anything in the news?â€? If the answer is “no,â€? she said, decide how to proceed based upon the emotional makeup of your child. For some children, it may be best not to raise the subject at all. Instead, oer general assurances about their safety, and let them know that if they do have questions and concerns they can turn to you for help.

Above all, Cohen stressed the importance of knowing your own children, and being able to anticipate how they will respond and what they will be able to absorb. “Kids aren’t always good at expressing themselves. You must be sensitive to when a child needs to communicate,� said Sterne. “Try not to ignore the signs, and be open to talking about this; don’t push it down because of your own discomfort with the topic.� “Communication is really important,�

SPECIAL REPORT – Tragedy in Newtown seconded Cohen. “It’s an opportunity to talk to kids about who they can go to when they are upset about something. Keep in mind that a child’s ďŹ rst reaction to the conversation may change over time. î ˘ey may come back to you, so keep the door open.â€?

However, she cautioned, once your children have talked about their concerns, they should move on with their lives and continue with their routines.

When children don’t talk about their worries, Dr. Sterne said, their fears and anxieties may grow. If your child knows about the tragedy but isn’t talking about it, Cohen recommended parents be on the lookout for signals that their children may be struggling. Sleep disturbances like insomnia or nightmares, not eating and the appearance of new fears may be signs that a child is harboring anxieties about the Sandy Hook shootings. As always, if your children seem to need more help than you can provide, Cohen urged parents to seek support from a trained counselor.

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No link between Asperger’s and violence

by Eric Hal Schwartz Staff Writer

C

onjecture about the role of mental illness in Friday’s tragedy in Connecticut filled articles and blog posts almost immediately, fueled in part by the anonymous law enforcement official who informed the Associated Press that the shooter, Adam Lanza, had been diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome. Asperger’s syndrome is a neurodevelopmental disorder oen characterized by difficulties with social cues and communications, referred to as social cognition by specialists. “ere’s no evidence of any linkage between having Asperger’s disorder and a propensity for violence,” said Dr. Eve Band, a clinical psychologist in Owings Mills, Md., who has worked with children and adults with Asperger’s and autism spectrum disorder for more than two decades.

People seeking an answer to what led to the attack might spark an unjust vilification of people with Asperger’s disorder, Band added, so it is vitally important that people understand that there is really no link between having Asperger’s and violent behavior. Mental illness in general and its role in violence grew quickly in the media and online with the publication soon aer the attack of a column on the Blue Review, penned by blogger Liza Long, about her own difficulties raising a mentally ill and sometimes violent son. e piece, titled “I am Adam Lanza’s Mom,” quickly spread all over the Web, cycling rapidly through the standard lauding, backlash and analysis until it became almost inextricably linked to the tragedy that inspired Long to write it.

But while discussing mental illness and its treatment in the U.S. makes sense, linking the specific disorder of Asperger’s to violent tendencies does not, Band said. ere is ev-

idence to link some mental illnesses such as depression and anxiety disorders to violent behavior, and it’s possible that Lanza had more than just Asperger’s disorder.

“He could have had a dual diagnosis,” she said.

Research in the area has led to some reports suggesting such a link, such as a study in the Journal of American Psychiatry and the Law Online looking at possible connections between Asperger’s disorder and criminal tendencies. But ultimately the study found the results inconclusive and requiring

quences have drawn more scrutiny and analysis than ever before. Depression, anger and destructive or self-destructive acts have all been connected to feelings of social ostracism and disconnection, feelings that could very easily have played a role in Lanza’s actions as they did for other school shooters. ere are efforts by communities and schools to eliminate and discourage the isolation and ridicule students with intellectual and learning disabilities oen face.

“Students with disabilities are more prone to issues of self-esteem,” said Rochelle Wer-

“There’s no evidence of any linkage between having Asperger’s disorder and a propensity for violence.”

— Dr. Eve Band, a clinical psychologist in Owings Mills, Md. further research. e study did state that they found men more likely to have violent tendencies. But since approximately four times more men than women are diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome, this is not conclusive evidence. Experts like Band can therefore confidently assert that there is no convincing evidence to indicate those with Asperger’s will be violent because of their disorder. People on the autism spectrum may act out and become aggressive when they are frustrated with their difficulty in understanding others or making themselves understood, but that kind of impulsive action is very different from any premeditated violence and is the same behavior anyone may exhibit when similarly frustrated.

“Having Asperger’s doesn’t raise the risk of their being violent more than anyone else,” she said.

In recent years, bullying and its conse-

tenteil, the president and chair of the board for the Sulam program. e Sulam program is integrated into local Jewish day schools and works to support students with a variety of learning and intellectual disabilities, including Asperger’s and autism spectrum disorders, within the Jewish school setting. Children can thus be included in the community, valued and brought to their full potential, she said. “ey deserve to be accepted, not just tolerated,” Wertenteil said.

Until now listed as an individual disorder, the new edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders coming out this spring will fold Asperger’s under the larger heading of autism spectrum disorders on the higher functioning end of the spectrum. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, one in 88 children at age 8 will fall somewhere on the

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SPECIAL REPORT – Tragedy in Newtown autism disorder spectrum, although this includes the entire range of possible manifestations.

Lanza’s motives and reasoning may never be fully known but there can’t ultimately be a real connection to anything on the autism spectrum, Band concluded.

“Most who have Asperger’s are actually very rule bound and rule abiding,” she said.

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inking differently at e Nora School

by Emily Jacobs Staff Writer

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or students seeking a smaller, more intimate high school environment, look no further than e Nora School located on Sligo Avenue in Silver Spring.

With just 60 students and 12 faculty members, e Nora School has been providing a unique and more personal educational experience for its students since 1964.

WJW spoke with Marcia Miller, director of admissions, and Dave Mullen, head of school, to learn more about e Nora School and what it offers to the community.

How would you describe e Nora School, and what makes it different from other educational institutions?

We’re a small college prep high school, and we work with bright kids who have been frustrated in other schools, particularly the larger, more impersonal high schools. We work with students who have a variety of learning challenges such as ADHD or anxiety who get lost in the shuffle in a bigger schools. e big thing with our students here is that they’re known. We have very small classes (no larger than 12 students) with six to 10 students in a classroom. Our students’

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strengths and challenges are known by their teachers, and we just know our students in a more holistic way. ey have a voice in the school, which is extremely important.

How is your curriculum different from a larger school?

Our curriculum is largely discussion based, so that the students’ voices are heard in the classroom, and they can explore ideas our loud and get a lot of their information that way.

What is your advice for parents who are looking to enroll their child in a school similar to yours?

I think you just have to know your child because every child is different. While some kids can thrive in bigger schools and find smaller communities within the school, there are a lot of kids who don’t find their niche, and so going to school becomes a chore for them. Education should be a lot more fun than that, and we want our kids to be excited about it.

What is your college prep like?

For our juniors we take them on a threeday retreat to emphasize the importance of their junior year in terms of applying for col-

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leges. We also have them meet with college counselors to come up with a list of schools that they may want to visit. For seniors we take them on a three-day retreat to work on their applications and essays, and make sure that our college counselor follows through with them.

What about those that are worried about the SAT or ACT? If a child has a learning challenge, then we make sure that there is appropriate documentation on file stating that they’re entitled to accommodations. We also make sure to not raise anxiety about the test, because most of the liberal arts colleges that our students apply to are good at teasing out what’s important and what isn’t so they look more at transcripts and essays and its less of a numbers game.

What has your feedback been from your alumni who have gone off to college?

We see the students every year at a big dinner the day before anksgiving. ey always tell us that they feel much more prepared than their peers, which makes their first year of college much easier for them. What is great about our curriculum is that we teach our students organizational techniques so that

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when they begin their freshman year of college they know how to break up a larger assignment and organize themselves, so they don’t get into a bad place.

As administrators, how did you handle the shooting that took place in Newtown last week?

We had a moment of silence for the victims and we spoke to the students about the social and legal implications and policy changes that need to be handled in terms of mental difficulties and gun policies. We want them to look at the broader picture, and let them know that they don’t have to sit by helplessly, but they can write to their congressmen, and tell them how they feel. We also have a social worker that they can speak to.

Lastly, how would you describe your school to someone who has never heard of it?

We think it’s a very human place where people are known and treated as individuals.

We teach our students and take them from where they are to where they should be when they head off to college. e kids know that they have a personal connection with the teacher and with their peers, and that really makes all the difference.

Camp&SchoolGuide

How Asperger’s impacted my decision to study in Israel

by Nathan Weissler

T

his past June, I graduated from the Melvin J. Berman Hebrew Academy in Rockville. I attended the Sulam program which is a special education program housed in the Melvin J. Berman Hebrew Academy. I am currently studying at Yeshivat Darkaynu, a special needs program housed on the grounds of Yeshivat Har Etzion in Gush Etzion. As I approached my high school graduation this past year, I thought seriously about what I could do going forward to carry on my family’s dedication to Judaism and Zionism. Aer a lot of consideration, I decided that I would very much like to study in Israel. I committed to do whatever I could to fulfill that dream.

When I was very young, I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome, which, among other things, can make social interactions and hand-eye coordination difficult. I also occasionally experience substantial anxiety.

Sometimes, I can be perceived as socially awkward. I was uneasy about living away from home because of these concerns.

However, I was confident that studying in

Israel would be easier because that was something that I very much wanted to do.

Furthermore, I knew that if I achieved my goal of studying in Israel, I would have great potential to give hope and encouragement to others. I also knew that studying in Israel would be a truly life-changing experience.

I believe that people who experience substantial obstacles in life have great potential to transform their challenges into advantages. is principle helps motivate me to continue to do my best. In my opinion, because of the perspective on life that it has given me, Asperger Syndrome ultimately makes it easier for me to be successful.

During my first week in Israel, I traveled with the other members of my program to the Kotel, the Western Wall, in the Old City of Jerusalem. Davening at the Kotel has been one of my most meaningful experiences in Israel so far. I recognized that receiving spiritual inspiration at the Kotel and throughout my time in Eretz Yisrael will give me increased courage to do whatever I can to move closer to Hashem (God) and to build my life as a Jew. I also was very

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moved when several people in the Old City of Jerusalem greeted me, saying, “Welcome home.” I feel very much at home in Eretz Yisrael.

Additionally, I had several meaningful experiences in November 2012, when Hamas was launching rockets from Gaza into Israel. I spent time in Jerusalem with some of my cousins who live in Israel. I bought a Kiddush cup in Jerusalem. One of my primary goals was to share my great appreciation of Judaism and Israel with others by my use of the Kiddush cup. Additionally, during a time of danger, I very much wanted to help inspire others in terms of their overall Jewish commitment. I thought a good way to do that would be to explain the fact that I bought that Kiddush cup in Jerusalem during a dangerous time and that I very much wanted to inspire other people who see me using the Kiddush cup. I will always remember that story.

I am very much looking forward to continuing to have a wonderful school year studying in Israel.

Nathan Weissler, 20, is studying in Israel for this school year. He is from Chevy Chase.

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Everything you want to know about college admissions but are afraid to ask

by Meredith Jacobs Managing editor

A

s the mother of a high-school junior, my world is ever more revolving around college. But with rumors that our children must obtain a perfect 2400 SAT score, 5.0 grade point average and found an orphanage in Africa in order to garner an acceptance letter to the college of their choice, it’s hard to separate fact from fiction.

So I spoke to Brie Jeweler- Bentz, college counselor, and asked her everything my daughter and I want to know as we navigate the treacherous waters of college admissions.

Do families have to hire a private college counselor in order for their child to get into their dream school? Has the playing field changed because of private counselors?

It’s very analogous to SAT and ACT preparation. It used to be “eat something good and get a good night’s sleep” and now it’s “how much money do you have? How much prep can you afford or schedule in?”

Not everyone has access to test preparation tutors. Does it put them at a disadvantage?

Yes. Is that fair? No. It’s the same with college counselors. A lot of families do it.

I sort of am an independent private consultant, a personal counselor for students. I take them through the whole process — first I get to know the student and figure out a list of potential colleges. en it’s time to do research — visit the schools, talk to the parents and get the list down to where the student will actually apply. en I help with the application process — making sure the applications are filled out correctly, that they are submitted by deadline.

I heard a rumor that college advisers actually write the students’ essays. Is this true?

I help the student brainstorm the essay topic, but I would never, ever write it. Certainly, I will edit it so it does the job content wise. I’ll also help the student prep for interviews and help with the final decision of where to go if they are accepted into multiple places.

Is much of your job anxiety and stress management?

Yes, particularly in this area, there is a lot of pressure.

I have a doctorate in clinical psychology and my therapy experience is in college counseling centers. Before my doctorate, I was an undergraduate at University of Michigan and aer graduating, worked for the university as an admission’s officer. I loved admissions and

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December 20, 2012 • Washington Jewish Week

college and didn’t want to do therapy, so I created my own business.

We are fortunate to live in an area with outstanding schools. But they are also filled with outstanding students. Is it hard for any student to stand out? Are students competing with their classmates? Do colleges compare students to applicants from their school? is is a myth. You’re made to feel like you need to be out in Wyoming to get in, but most schools don’t have quotas. If there are 50 amazing students from Wootton, they’ll all get in.

I was on the phone this morning with admissions officers from University of Wisconsin because I had been hearing rumors that Wisconsin doesn’t like Churchill High School — that rock stars from Churchill are not getting in to Wisconsin. ey said it’s ridiculous, that we would never say we don’t like a school.

Do you have to found an orphanage in Africa to get accepted into your dream school?

No, you don’t have to found an orphanage.

Curing cancer is just fine.

But seriously, colleges used to look for wellrounded students, but now they’re looking for angular kids — kids with a sharper point.

Meaning, a student who has been in a few activities and really dug in — created a specialty.

What schools want now is a well-rounded class made up of sharpened students.

And, know that when colleges ask for a list of activities, they want ninth grade forward.

If you want them to know about something life changing you did in middle school, you may want to use that in your essay.

I feel like I keep hearing the same 10 colleges listed by every high-schooler. Does it help your chances of getting in to find a less popular school?

Everybody today is very savvy — we know what’s out there. We know the whole country and the Ivys. ere is so much pressure to get into the best college. But there are 4,000 schools. We need to expand the list.

Some big schools are very popular, but not every kid is a big rah-rah kid. But they may not know that.

You may not have the grades and scores to go to Harvard. But that’s okay.

I tell my students that they are the consumer — they need to think if the college is right for them.

What do colleges look for? Is it more important to get a B in an AP class or an A in a regular class?

Grades and the rigor of curriculum are the most important factors. And, what I mean by rigor of curriculum is how rigorous it is for what the school offers — what courses the student took relative to other students.

For some schools, it’s more formulaic — grade point average, standardized test scores.

But most schools are looking holistically at the students, meaning they care about the essays and recommendations. Have they been a leader, an innovator? Are they active and engaged? en the college may think, aer we get them, they’ll go out in the world and do damage — in a good way.

I believe it’s all about balance. Don’t load up on honors and AP classes and get Bs across the board. Don’t compromise the grades completely. But you also don’t want to take less challenging classes and get all As. I tell my students to take the curriculum you can successfully manage. at also means emotionally manage.

Some of these kids are just fried. ey are working until 2 in the morning, not seeing friends. You need to have a life, you need to attend to your hygiene.

“Manage” in terms of keeping your GPA at a competitive level.

For a student whose math isn’t his strong suit, he could take an honors class and maybe get a B, but it will take a lot of work. Take a regular class and get the A. You can always write an explanation for why you dropped this class. Attach it to your application. Even in common applications, you can add additional information. You can say, “I wanted to challenge myself but it meant tutors, and I had to be honest with myself.”

I encourage my students to take ownership of their situation.

Same is true for students with learning issues. I always have my students write up explanations for what is challenging How do you know if your SAT or ACT test scores are good enough for a school? e Fisk Guide publishes the range of scores for students admitted into the school.

And the individual college websites give a student profile. Is that valuable information? Sort of. I don’t want the college to say 3.8 and the kid has a 3.5 and doesn’t apply.

We don’t necessarily know what that score is — is it weighted? Do they take out phys ed and ceramics and just look at the core GPA? I hate when people rule out a school. On the other hand, if a student has 2.0 and wants to go to Stanford... .

Do colleges look at freshman year grades?

Camp & School Guide

It depends on the school. By and large, colleges want to see trends. ey know in the early years you are adjusting. When I was at Michigan, we didn’t look at ninth grade at all.

I think colleges are like that. ey’ll consider the grades. If you’re going to have a bad year, as long as it’s freshman year, it’s okay. Some schools, you have to be a rock star every year.

Or you can explain what happened that year.

You’ll probably be okay.

When does the college search begin?

Without getting too crazy and stressed, it should get on the radar for parents in seventh or eighth grade. You need to be mindful of what you’re taking in middle school because some of these classes show up on high school resumes. Start getting active in activities that you’re passionate in, learn how to manage time and work so that you can handle things in ninth grade because that’s when colleges start looking. e summer aer 10th grade is a good time to start test prep. I like to have students start with me the fall semester of junior year. Some students come in saying, “I want to be a doctor and this is where I want to go.” Fall semester is when we create that list of colleges and start doing business.

You have to have the college mind-set for course selection, activities, test prep — early.

Can’t you just use your high school guidance counselor?

At bigger high schools, like Wootton, they have a lot of students. Wootton has a college person on staff in addition to guidance counselors. When parents come to me, they say that high school person doesn’t have time to really get to know their kid.

Should the student know where she wants to go and what she wants to do?

No. I had a student who had to answer “what are your academic and career goals” for an application and she was freaking out. I said, let’s own it — say you don’t know and that college can be the place to figure it out.

Do you see a lot of students who have parental pressure to get into certain schools?

It’s very high pressure. I try to get everything out on the table. I ask: “Who is ultimately making the decision?” Are the parents? What parameters are you putting on? Does the student have to go to Maryland because the parent went to Maryland? Does the student have to stay local? I don’t want someone to have California on the list and See ADMISSIONS, next page

Camp&SchoolGuide ADMISSIONS from previous page then they go through the application process and their parents tell them they can’t go.

I do have parents who have put parameters — some understandably and some not understandably. It’s awful to have that conversation aer the applications come out.

I’m hearing more and more about students going to state schools for undergrad and using the money saved for private graduate schools. Or even going to a community college for two years to save money. e economy is significant. Our community colleges are undervalued. e kids feel like losers. It’s a shame because you can crank out two years and transfer and your degree is the same. But you do sacrifice a traditional college experience.

I’m now reading articles saying college is waste of money. Kids feel like they have to major in business or health to get their money’s worth.

Lately, whenever I mention college to my daughter, no matter what I say, I’ve said the wrong thing.

Understand where your kid is at. ey all talk to each other. No matter what you say, you’re not going to win. Know that the messages you’ve been cramming into her head will win out.

Stress, fear — the stakes are really high. ese kids really feel that. Just be there and try to talk as much as possible. Meanwhile, they are trying to live their life and are going through developmental stuff about separating from mom and dad.

We parents all joke that we would not have been accepted to our alma maters if we were to apply now. True?

Absolutely true! A lot of schools switched to the common application a couple of years ago. It makes it easier for kids to apply. e sheer number of applications makes it more competitive. You have these poor counselors who have to read all these applications.

And, for some schools, like the Ivys, it’s always a crap shoot. We don’t know why they took student A over student B. How do you figure out the list? e list really needs to be tailored to the student. ere are schools that I love, but don’t work for everyone. Are they shy, outgoing? Where geographically do they need to be? I generate a list from that. ere are schools that fly under radars, like Quinnipiac University. I have to educate the families about schools like this. I try to be honest about it. I say, “We are not going to rule this school out because you can’t pronounce the name. Just put it on the list for me. And when you apply, you’ll go visit.”

But I know it’s hard in this area. Parents

want to say, “My kid is at this school or that school.” ere is a book, Colleges at Change Lives.

It doesn’t have to be Harvard.

I was at Bard, at the information session.

And the admissions director said, “I bet everybody in this room is concerned primarily about getting in. What do I have to do to get in? Who else is getting in? And no one is thinking, ‘What do I want to get out of college?’ ” You are the consumer.

Part of this is fear. Part is a lot of these kids don’t know themselves well enough. How am I supposed to know if this is a good fit for me? ey really just don’t know.

How do you help your kid? Exposure, dialogue. If you don’t have time to travel around the country, you can see a diversity of schools locally. Go to George Washington University, to Georgetown, to UMD, to Goucher — go see. Get a feel for a city campus, a suburban campus. A big school, a small school. For some students they aren’t going to know until they go and experience. And if it doesn’t work, that’s when you have a transfer.

Many schools offer summer programs for high school students. Does this help your child get into that school?

Going to summer classes doesn’t hurt, but it doesn’t give the kid an edge just because he went to the summer program.

It does help this way: If you are on the campus and interacting with faculty and eating in the cafeteria and living in the dorm, when they ask you, “Why do you want to go here,” your answer is that much richer.

And, it shows interest. A demonstrated interest factor — campus visits, etc. is important for some schools.

What can parents do early to help position the child well for college?

Remember the movie, Parenthood? Rick Moranis has this kid who is 4, and he’s doing flash cards with her. And that’s insane. I like sneaking cauliflower in mashed potatoes.

Laying the foundation, encouraging her when she wants to run for SGA president. Get your kids reading. Nothing will teach them vocabulary more. Encourage them when they get to a word they don’t know to figure it out in context; if not, to look it up. is is all important stuff.

Talk about the essay. e admissions team is reading thousands of essays answering the same question. How do you make yours stand out?

Essays that are good are essays that when you put down you say, “I absolutely know this kid, and it’s someone I want on my campus.”

If you’re a funny, sarcastic, dry-witted person, incorporate that. I have a kid who is an environmentalist at heart, and she wrote her essay about her bearded dragon. I have a kid who wrote about Honey Bunches of Oats (the cereal).

So many kids are doing the service trips.

When I applied to school, no one did that.

Kids say they can’t write about these experiences because they’re commonplace. But at the same time, no one had the experience you had. If you had a defining moment there and it changed who you are — write about it.

Make sure it’s well written and answer the question. If there is a prompt, answer the prompt. e essay that talks about something seemingly small, a nugget, that the student can artfully explode, is wonderful. e ones who talk about “internship” and “leadership” — they run into each other. I’d rather hear about your trip to the grocery store. Some students feel like they haven’t done anything incredible, but you can make anything incredible if you write it in the right way.

I will read an essay and have a visceral reaction. I get revved up and I think I love this kid. And sometimes, you don’t care at all.

I know you can feel like there’s nothing that sets you apart. ere are kids with amazing accomplishments, and they stand out. But your personality can stand out. It can just be who you are. If you can show that to the admissions counselor, they see that and like you and root for you.

How much does it cost to hire a college adviser and are you basically paying for someone with connections to get your child into a school? e range is $3,000-$6,000.

Honest, to some extent, yes. I would never say, “I can get you in.” ere are certainly students where I made the difference — I got on the phone, I advocated. I happen to have connections at University of Michigan and other schools.

But it’s hard to cultivate connections with college admissions directors long term. ere is so much turn over.

I always do a free of charge meet and greet.

I want families to get a good vibe, to feel like we could be a team.

When should a family hire a consultant?

If you feel clueless about the process, or don’t have time, energy or motivation to do all the research yourself.

If you’re going to murder each other.

If there is a specialty area. For example I work with students with special needs and there are some consultants who work with athletes.

What needs to be considered as a Jewish family?

Some families say, “I don’t want my kid to be the token Jew.” ere are some schools with few Jews on campus. Families can call Campus Ministries or Hillel at various schools and find out what is Jewish life like.

But what does that mean for each family?

Does that mean a kosher kitchen? Does it mean a Hillel? Georgetown is a Jesuit university, but it’s located in Washington, D.C., with a thriving Jewish community. ere’s a difference between that and Alabama.

But there are a lot of misconceptions. I tell parents not to rule out the entire South. ere are Jews at Emory.

Any final advice to parents?

Before I started doing this, I was kind of worried. You want so much for your child.

But this job has been so eye-opening. I actually feel less stressed now. ese kids have stories, they’ve been in rehab, they’ve tanked in math, but they’re going places. I feel like my kid will be fine.

Parents, there are so many schools out there. ere is one that is the right fit. Balance all this nonsense about being a rock star with being a regular kid. If you have to work so hard, have so many tutors to get to Harvard, it’s not worth it. What’s going to be there at Harvard? More of the same.

It can’t be all about grades and scores‚ they have to be mentally healthy. Focus on their well-being. It can be such a stressful process.

We need to be open-minded and not put pressure on someone who is feeling pressured enough.

If you can get an objective person [like a college counselor] involved in the process, that can help.

Start early, that can help.

Brie Jeweler-Bentz lives in Rockville with her husband and 10-year-old daughter. To learn more about Jeweler-Bentz and the School Counseling Group call 240-994-7901 or email brie.jeweler@verizon.net.

Har Shalom Early Childhood Education Center Half & Full-Day programs for ages 2-5 s small, nuturing classes s emergent curriculum s enrichment classes

s summer program s early drop off @ 7:30 a.m. s late pick-up @ 6:00 p.m.

s MSDE Certified s PJLL Commended school s English & Hebrew programs

Now accepting applications for 2013-2014!

Limited openings for January s Open House Jan. 14 @ 10 a.m. www.HarShalomECEC.org s 301-299-7087, Ext. 244 s 11510 Falls Rd s Potomac, MD

Camp & School Guide

Washington Jewish Week • December 20, 2012

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Camp&SchoolGuide SLEEPAWAY CAMPS CAPITAL CAMPS Waynesboro, PA Winter Office: 11300 Rockville Pike Suite 407 Rockville, MD 20852 301-GOT-CAMP (301-468-2267) www.capitalcamps.org The official Jewish overnight camp of the Greater Washington DC community is just one hour from Rockville. The glatt kosher overnight camp is for children entering grades 3-10. Sessions of 2, 3 or 4 weeks are available!

Gorgeous facility includes new cabins, arts & theater center, aquatics center, ropes & challenge course and climate controlled dining hall.

Capital Camps is a beneficiary agency of the Jewish Federation of Greater Washington, a member agency of the Jewish Community Centers Association (JCCA) and is American Camp Association (ACA) accredited. Financial aid is available.

HABONIM DROR CAMP MOSHAVA www.campmosh.org Executive Director, Jen Silber 301-348-7339, jen@campmosh.org Registrar Tammy Schmidt 800-454-2205, tammy@campmosh. org.

Jewish celebration, social justice, love of Israel, leadership development, community service and lots of fun. Creative Shabbat observance, skits, singing, dancing, sports, swimming, low ropes challenge course, tubing, canoeing, crafts and more. Build lifelong friendships and strong Jewish identities. One-week introductory experience for rising 3rd graders, two-week options for rising 4th, 5th, and 6th graders, and four and eight weeks for all rising 4th – 10th graders. ACA accredited.

DAY CAMPS CAMP ACHVA (SCHOOL-AGE) 8900 Little River Turnpike, Fairfax, VA 22031, (703) 323-0880, www.jccnv.org Rising Kindergarten through 10th grades Hours: 9am-4pm, Monday through Friday, Before- and After-Camp Care available Nori White, Camp Director, NoriW@jccnv.org, (703) 537-3041 Jessica Tischler, Special Needs Director, Jessi-

caT@jccnv.org, (703) 537-3031 Since 1969, Camp Achva offers an exciting day camp experience in a caring Jewish environment.

Age appropriate camps include: general programming for rising kindergarteners through 6th grade, arts camps, theater camps, special needs camp with inclusion programming, one-week specialty camps, teen travel camp and counselorin-training programs. Activities include: swim lessons, arts and crafts, sports, Israeli culture and dance, drama and music, science and nature.

Camp sessions run from June 24–August 23.

Highly qualified staff; Israeli shlichim; Shabbat programs; Before- and After-Camp childcare.

CAMP JCC Jewish Community Center of Greater Washington 6125 Montrose Road.

Rockville, MD 20852 301-348-3883 campjcc@jccgw.org Camp JCC programs allow campers to develop skills, make lifelong friendships, enhance Jewish identity and create unforgettable memories in a nurturing and inclusive environment. General and specialty camp programs are available for children age 4 through entering 9th grade, and our CIT program for entering 10th graders. Campers swim twice a day, enjoy theme days, field trips, special events and Kabbalat Shabbat celebration. NEW THIS SUMMER: Mitzvah Corps Travel Program (entering grades 7-10) where campers can earn up to 30 SSL hours and more affordable bus transportation!

CAMP OLYMPIA 5511 Muncaster Mill Rd. Rockville, MD 301-926-9281 www.camp-olympia.com Celebrating our 54th anniversary serving families in the Washington suburban area. We offer an instructional sports program for children 3 - 15. Our sports include: swimming, mountain biking, horseback riding, gymnastics, soccer, tennis, basketball, track and field, plus much more. All facilities are located at the Camp. Other programs offered include year round horseback riding for children and adults, plus year round private nursery school for children ages 2-5.

Winter Break Horse Riding Camp Dec. 26 - 28.

CAMP SHORESH 2428 Pleasant View Road Adamstown, MD 21710

301-874-8150 shoresh@shoresh.com www.shoresh.com Shoresh, the Hebrew name for roots, is dedicated to providing educational enrichment programs related to our Jewish heritage. For seven weeks in the summer, children ages 4-15 can renew and reinforce links to their heritage.

The distinctive programming at Camp Shoresh combines the beauty of a rich Jewish studies program with an extensive range of physical activities including swimming, arts and crafts, sports, archery, challenge course, overnights, and Hershey Park -a design to create a total Jewish experience for body, mind, and soul.

Join us at our beautiful 107 acre facility in Adamstown, Maryland.

HARBOR SCHOOL 7701 Bradley Blvd., Bethesda, MD 20817 www.theharborschool.org Whether attending our fabulous Summer Camp or our dynamic School, your child's unique brilliance will have an opportunity to shine. Our half-day Summer Camp provides a fun, safe environment for children ages 2 1/2 to 12. Admissions Open House for the 2013-14 school year on January 10 at 10:00am.

IMAGINATION STAGE 4908 Auburn Ave. Bethesda, MD 20814 Info: 301-961-6060 Box Office: 301-280-1660 www.imaginationstage.org Imagination Stage is the largest and most respected multi-disciplinary theatre arts organization for young people in the Mid-Atlantic region. We offer a year-round season of professional shows (adult actors performing for families and classes), after-school programs and summer camps for ages 1-18, and arts-integration professional development training for teachers, students, schools and families. All of our programs are informed by our core belief in making the arts inclusive and accessible to all children, regardless of their physical, cognitive or financial status.

JCCGW PRESCHOOL Jewish Community Center of Greater Washington 6125 Montrose Road.

Rockville, MD 20852 301-348-3839 preschool@jccgw.org Preschool, T/K and Kindergarten – where chil-

dren and families grow together. The Early Childhood Education program offers 10 & 12 month program options for children age 24 months-5 years; half- and full-day Preschool options and full-day Transitional Kindergarten and Kindergarten; early drop off at 7:30 a.m. and late pick-up at 6 p.m., a child-centered environment infused with Jewish values; HoliDaycare when school is closed, but the JCCGW is open; and a summer program with daily swim!

JEWISH COMMUNITY CENTER OF NORTHERN VIRGINIA SUMMER DAY CAMPS 8900 Little River Turnpike, Fairfax, VA 22031 (703) 323-0880; www.jccnv.org CAMP AHAVA (PRESCHOOL) Amy Vermillion, Early Childhood Services Director, AmyV@jccnv.org, (703) 537-3038 Uniquely designed as a hands-on developmental program combining learning and fun join together to create a dynamic summer experience. Experienced early childhood professionals (from our preschool program) are teamed with carefully selected college and high school students. Specialists provide enriching activities each session. Special entertainment is also planned!

Camp sessions from June 24-August 23 CAMP K’TON TON 20 months (by 6/30/13)-23 months 9am-1pm only; 24 months (by 6/30/13)-35 months CAMP K’TONA 3 years old (by 9/30/13); 4 years old (by 9/30/13) CAMP K’TONA TOO (preschool) Alexandria, JCCNV-Beth El Hebrew Congregation 3830 Seminary Road, Alexandria, VA 22304 20 months (as of 6/30/13) to 4 years (as of 9/30/13) 9am to 1pm, Before and After Camp Care available Camp Options: Two year olds: 2-day (T/TH), 3-day (M/W/F) and 5-day options.

Three year olds: 3-day (M/W/F) and 5-day options Four year olds: 5-days only

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Camp & School Guide

Camp&SchoolGuide LOCAL JEWISH DAY SCHOOLS BETH SHOLOM EARLY CHILDHOOD CENTER AND KINDERGARTEN Potomac, MD 12 months through Kindergarten Nurturing teachers; full day options available; wide variety of Enrichment Programs; welcoming families from all Jewish backgrounds.

Register today and receive up to $1,000 of ECC Thank You Coupons.

Sue Finger, Director: 301.279.7010 x214 sfinger@bethsholom.org www.bethsholomecc.org

CHARLES E. SMITH JEWISH DAY SCHOOL Lower School 1901 E. Jefferson St. Rockville, MD 20852-4029 301-881-1400 Upper School 11710 Hunters Ln. Rockville, MD 20852-2363 www.cesjds.org Kindergarten through 12th grade independent day school that emphasizes academic success in an environment that nurtures a strong Jewish identity. At CESJDS, connections are a part of a complete educational experience. Connections to Judaism, community, history and ideas are what make our students successful in college and beyond. Find out more about how CESJDS helps all students connect to success. Contact our admissions office at 301 692-4870 to set up a tour and see for yourself!

CHILDREN’S LEARNING CENTER 4511 Bestor Dr. Rockville, MD 20852 www.clcmd.org 301-871-6600 dottieclc@gmail.com Nursery school and elementary K-6 as well as Camp CLC, child-care on site 7am-6pm.

Small classes, homework room, vegetarian lunch program, after school activities. Maryland State Dept. of Education approved and accredited.

GESHER JEWISH DAY SCHOOL 4800 Mattie Moore Ct Fairfax, VA 22030 703-978-9789 www.gesher-jds.org For three decades, Gesher JDS has been the center of learning for Jewish children of all the backgrounds throughout Northern Virginia. Our academic program weaves Judaics and Hebrew with a rigorous general studies curriculum, providing TWO educations in ONE for Kindergarten through Middle School. Transportation, after-before school care, financial assistance, and accreditation by the (VAIS) Virginia Association of Independent Schools.

JEWISH PRIMARY DAY SCHOOL OF THE NATION'S CAPITAL 6405 16th St., NW Washington, DC 20001 202-291-JPDS (5737) www.jpds.org sindy.udell@jpds.org The Jewish Primary Day School of the Nation’s Capital (JPDS-NC) is a community day school that provides a challenging and creative dual curriculum in general and Judaic studies in pre-kindergarten through sixth grade in classroom settings with low student/teacher ratios.

We foster a lifelong love of learning, a sense of community and a solid moral foundation.

JPDS-NC offers DC and Montgomery County busses and extended day programs.

TORAH SCHOOL OF GREATER WASHINGTON 2010 Linden Lane Silver Spring, MD 20901 301-962-8003 Headmaster: Rabbi Yitzchak Charner Secular Studies Principal: Mrs. Julie Malka Outstanding, motivating, and challenging Judaic and secular studies programs for kindergarten — 6th grade. Dedicated, enthusiastic, caring staff makes learning fun and exciting.

Emphasis on basic skills, student involvement, and on developing higher thinking, analytical skills. Focus on relevance of Judaism to our lives and love for Torah study and on performance of Mitzvos. Derech Eretz stressed in all facets of school life. Commitment to individualization. Strong school and home partnership.

Approved by Maryland State Department of Education.

Sharing Knowledge. Creating Opportunity.

THE FAES GRADUATE SCHOOL AT NIH

Announces the schedule of courses for the

SPRING 2013 SEMESTER

The evening classes sponsored by the Foundation for Advanced Education in the Sciences will be held on the NIH Campus

COURSES ARE OFFERED IN: biochemistry, bioinformatics, biology, biotechnology (daytime courses), chemistry, immunology, languages, medicine, microbiology, pharmacology, public health, statistics, technology transfer, alternative medicine, board reviews, and courses of general interest.

Technology Transfer Advanced Studies and Public Health Advanced Studies.

SPRING SEMESTER OPEN HOUSE: January 9, 2013 4 p.m. - 7 p.m.

9101 Old Georgetown Road Bethesda, MD

WALK-IN REGISTRATION: Walk-in registration will be held from January 15 — January 23, 2013

Classes will begin the week of January 28

To have a schedule sent call 301-496-7976 or visit our website at www.faes.org

JCCGW PRESCHOOL Apply for Summer 2013! s Expanded hours for summer 2013 s Instructional & recreational swim every day s Affordable round-trip bus transportation s 3 Sessions: June 24 – August 9 s New theater and day travel programs s Field trips, theme days & special events s Extended day AM/PM care

Registration for 2013-2014 opens January 2013! s 10- & 12-month program options for children age 24 months through 5 years s Half- and full-day Preschool options and full-day Transitional Kindergarten and Kindergarten s Early drop off at 7:30 a.m. and late pick up at 6 p.m. s Child-centered environment infused with Jewish values s Kid Koverage and HoliDaycare offered s Summer Program available with daily swim

Visit jccgw.org or call 301.881.0100 JCC of Greater Washington s 6125 Montrose Road s Rockville, MD 20852 Camp & School Guide

Washington Jewish Week • December 20, 2012

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December 20, 2012 â&#x20AC;˘ Washington Jewish Week

Camp & School Guide